Osborne Gets His Soundbite | Nick Robinson
Moonbat V Chomsky | Charles Crawford
Beecroft is “S**t” | LibDem MP
News of the World Trailed Watson’s Mistaken Mistress | Indy
Shabana Mahmood MP Saves Brum Market | ITV News
Plan a Velvet Divorce for the €uro | Gideon Rachman
Truth About Romney’s Bain “Vampire Capitalism” | Wall Street Journal
Clegg’s Revenge | Nick Wood
Cleaning Out Stables | Biased BBC
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
Norman Tebbit has a humble brag:
“We Maastricht rebels were derided and abused for opposing the single currency by the wise, clever, Guardianista soft centre left establishment from whom we now hear so little on the matter.”
The last Quango in Paris says:
Mr Bryant and Mr Watson managing to make the whole hacking affair look like a farce – the more they moan the less I care about the whole subject! So partisan it beggars belief at all costs. They cannot rise above it ! If I was to call the PM a ‘liar’ I would want to be VERY sure.
Hang Billy!
This Tory MP isn’t the only one…..
A public service announement by Guido Fawkes
There’s been a little confusion over payment dates relating to bank holidays in different area’s of the UK, including myself, so let my clarify things. Typically England do not share Scottish or Northern Ireland Bank Holidays but this does not effect benefit and tax credit payments although Scotland and NI do share English Bank Holidays.
It does not matter where in the UK you live. If there is a bank holiday anywhere in the UK (Eng, Scot, Wales or NI) you will typically receive payments a few days earlier, the DWP and HMRC are not allowed to make late payments. If you do not receive payment of benefits or tax credits on time you can request an emergency counter giro payment so that you do not have to wait until the holidays are over or until the Job Centres reopen. These can be cashed at the Post Office before they close for the Bank Holiday. You will need to provide proof of identity when collecting the counter giro-cheque and when cashing them at the Post Office. The Job Centre will be able to provide information as to which forms of ID are accepted.
Here is the link to the payment dates for Bank Holidays from Christmas 2010 to Christmas 2011.
http://www.hmrc.gov.uk/taxcredits/payments-entitlement/payments/next-payment-due.htm#3
The Christmas spirit is over. Bring back a harsher version of the workhouses.
Can’t the Taxpayers just leave sacks of money outside out home ?
I thought Gordon’s plan was to drop the freshly printed money from helicopters to the grateful serfs below. Like all his plans, it never quite got there.
Here’s another public service announcement.
The word “areas” is a plural NOT a possessive, so the use of an apostrophe, as used above; “area’s” is a solecism.
Similarly from the sentence construction, here; “There’s been a little confusion over payment dates relating to bank holidays in different area’s of the UK, including myself, so let my clarify things.” it would appear that Guido is, himself, an area of Britain!
Need I go on?
Yet our post offices are shut for Mon and Tue, as well as from 12:30 last Friday. As was our public library. So ‘public services’ think it’s OK in the present climate to bugger up their customers who have mail-order returns to post and library books to return but will be abroad for a time. Not to mention the effing London Tube lot.
Mind you, the Tube drivers striking (ie without pay) on a day when they would have got at least double time is slightly sweet. It’s a bit like the loony Scargill calling a miners’ strike in the Spring when coal stocks were very high.
I do hope this statement was printed in every known language thus allowing all the scroungers from the rest of the planet who have gathered here to benefit from our social services, the chance to collect their cash
How sweet. What a breath of fresh air. We are the new gayers, perverts and all round wankers now.
Does anyone know if a clementine will do instead of an orange?
Only if you address her in song using the words “Oh my darlin”
OK !
Not a good week for Vince … as he loses out to Cap’n Jack…
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1341589/Strictly-Come-Dancing-Christmas-special-John-Barrowman-beats-Fern-Britton-Vince-Cable-crowned-winner.html
I’m surprised the BBC give as much time to Barrowman as they do. Granted he is gay but he’s certainly not ethnic or black unless American is ethnic in their book.
I note that he was born in Scotland however so perhaps it’s a BBC Scottish Mafia thing.
Ain’t a cock, it’s a hen!
But as the saying goes…
Why let the facts spoil a good story (joke).
Ampers.
Looks like a “fine upstanding bantam cock” to me
SQUIRRRRRRRRRR… (fluff) (cuttle) (stare) OOYEWLOOKIN’AT!!!
Judging by the size of the comb and the size of the bird I would say that is a cock bantam.
It’s only a little cock.
Should be shown alongside hazel blears holding mr blears’ helmet
… in between her teeth.
With the dribble running down her chin onto her….. okay officer, I’ll come quietly.
Such Filth!
http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:M5bYr5vxuxbK3M:http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3406/3569091071_aca2b0ee90.jpg?v=0&t=1
There is a limit to what my bowels can withstand following my return from Africa, Pickled Wizard, and your photograph strays some considerable way beyond that delicate point.
Scuse me, I’m off…
Sorry, Ill tread on her and forget the whole thing….
You are a gentleman, Sir.
Looks like a `old english game` bantam cock to me
It’s a cock and so it seems is Ampers
But was not the cock a Bantam?
John Bray, 37, Rumbolds Lane, Haywards Heath, RH16 4NX
Too late for a Christmas card and there are bantam cocks.
What an awful house. Are you a Tory?
I thought you were. Peter.
I’m an international consultant, me.
WTF??
Have you no respect for a former Premier of South Australia ?
Bit of an ass, what ?
What the fuck!?
(apologies for double posting, the laughable mod didn’t like the first one, touchy bastard.)
FFS
Austrailia all out for 89
England 159-0
wheres mr Bowden ?
Hungover
Piss off, who fucking cares what you or your fucking relatives are up to you narcissistic wanker.
Clear, concise, succinct and to the point I think you speak for almost everyone.
Ever thought of joing
ing the diplomatic corps’e we need someone like you who speaks their mind?
My name is COCK, HANDYCOCK
So we meet again, Mr Cock.
And he has to hold it in both hands to prevent it from getting out of control.
Me too!
Lookin at him
i would say thats not the first time
he has held a strange cock !
Well, at least he doesn’t appear to be colour prejudiced in the area of the touchables.
Mornin ar moniker !
Morning Frankie. This item really appears to have brought out the worst in me, I regret to say.
I’m a traditionalist at Christmas,
Boxing day morning I always have a dump,
It knocks the stuffing out of me!
I prefer to have my stuffing knocked back in to me.
Coooeeee!!!
Well at least we avioded the follow on , Hope all had a good day yesterday and Santa emptyied his sack for them
Apologies for the joke @1. Rest assured a fellow EU-basher needn’t fear the Tyburn jig.
No worries .
When can we expect another election?
Here’s a clue ……..7 May 2015 ??
Heel, we have Genelar Erection onry evly fi yeals: is sulpisin’ we have popuratio’ glowth!
O/T Over in New Zealand i see that Billy Bowden had a great game .
i wuv u Billy.
Today i will be a Tyre.
Even side-on you’re still spoiling our view.
That’s neat, because I am a remould.
Unofficial caption comp?
“So free enterprise means you sell the eggs for a profit. Labour means that a man with a clipboard confiscates most of them. And what did the LibDem candidate tell you about economics?”
“He didn’t say anyfink, mister. He unzipped his flies and took the chicken in to the shed”
O/T : http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1341613/Secretive-lobbying-firm-claims-peerage.html
Give me a chance princess…..I know I can make you happy.
I wnt 2 b ur teddy ber, princess. Mike xxx
I’m 69th!
Do you really see something sexual about that picture?
Oh dear.
He had to wash the shit off his cock before he put it anywhere near those kids.
Said the expert on the subject !
For the last time, I’m not a fucking Tory!
Mr Guido sir, my cock it scares the shit out of the neighbours at the crack everyday. The Mrs, the old sow I keep in the baaarn, she don’t mind sir. Keeps her regular so it does.
I reckon that hen there the master is ‘olding will do my cock quite nicely sir.
Todat i will be an ice hockey puck !
I’ll eat you for breakfast.
Eat me.
That is a very small cock.
Size doesn’t matter.
Oh yes it does, when you are talking about brain…
not if your talking about a womans brain !
Ooooooh! Dear me. Tell me Frankie (in confidence of course, entre nous), how would you characterise your success rate with members of the opposite gender to date? (Using a scale of 10 to -50!)
Marriage should score -50 in the success stakes.
I celebrated 40 years of marriage last month, AC1. However, I do admit to having a major problem with my wife; she understands me …
Yes a bit lacking in the ladies dept over the last 29years
…..for a black one.
** NOTE TO ALL AREA PARTIES **
From the office of David Cameron:
Ensure that, when photographed with children, only a very small minority are white.
Please see the photo above as an example of how not to do it. Any questions, contact the Notting Hill Soviet.
* END *
But he’s got a black Cock wth a Ginger head.
After a tip off from the BBC, we are investigating this picture under the Race Relations Act and if the white male MP in question is found guilty of racism he will be sent for a 6 month diversity awareness course and the Harriet Harperson Equality for Women Labour Voters Centre (cost £350m from evil white male taxpayers)
First !
Get stuffed you hoon
My cock looks forward to a good stuffing.
My Hubby has a cock which he is always showing off in the barn. I’ve often wandered in there and seen him holding it in his hand. I’m such a bird lover, my tits are always all over his nuts, which hang in the garden, and this christmas I gave him a fine old gobbler on the kitchen table. Though what he really likes is stuffing.
Nice try, but you didn’t quite cover it all.
I see Phillip Hammond wants to introduce a Kneejerk law to fine airports for getting snowed in. And there was me thinking this new government was not going to be a nanny state big government. Does really think airports want to be closed by snow and lose hundreds of millions profits?
Hammond is a dickweed
Remind me : who’s respsonsible for keeping all our roads clear ?
BAA owned by Spaniards Ferrovial whose piles of debt are greater than their piles of snow.
Major investment in shovels planned once capital budget approved based on more borrowing.
If a company is fined and makes less profits, it puts up its prices or reduces its service to recover profits. Ultimately the traveller will be paying the fine.
Does anyone really think BAA did a good job at Heathrow recently?
Not I, but reports from friends tell me that asstd Continental airports were also closed for a couple of days – even Geneva, who ought to know how to deal with it.
It’s snow, it happens occasionally, it buggers everything up. Grow up, people.
I blame the Unions !!!!
Taking money away is the only thing bloated and useless monopolistic organisations understand. You can hardly take your custom away if you’re booked on a flight from “The Worst Airport in the World ©”
Fine the bastards until the pips squeak. It’s the only medicine.
A cock in the hand is worth half as much as two in the bush.
I like cock and I like bush but which is better.
There’s only one way to find out…….
A cock in the bush
is better than two in your hand !
Nice girls shave, Frankie.
i would have thought that due to your location
the ladies
down at your local nudist colony would have a good supply of body hair ?
all adds to the flavour !
I refer you to #137! Same problem!!!
Nicer girls are waxed.
Today I will shove some secretaries, throw some Nokias and blame it all on Sue.
??? Who’s Sue ?
I blame Nick..
Please Dave if you are reading this , Sell Scotland and leave the Fuckin EU !!!!
you can only sell an asset.
Okay , Give it away to anyone that will take it or even a million or 2 .
But in the topsy-turvy world of finance a debt is an asset and can be sold to the next mug who comes along. No wonder we’re in such an effing mess.
One persons debt is another persons credit.
I hope you are not one of those mongs who things FRB invents money…
thinks
A debt remains a debt until such time as it is paid. Until that time it is not an asset, it is a gamble at short odds.
The trouble is that bankers have become addicted to gambling with their customers’ money, and they’ve been making increasingly risky bets.
Seconded !
Or even, just give Scotland away, and stop paying EU ‘protection scam’ now.
Leaving the EU won’t be too difficult but who the F*”k would buy Jockland?
That ϲunt, Connery? We might be able to wangle a few tens of millions from him but he would then have to pay for his own wall.
Grow up FFS.
Quote of the day (with apologies to Mark Oaten)
Guido Fawkes
“This coalition is a shower of shit”
Tut Tut Tom , A socailist never says sorry ! Thought you would have known that.
Even someone with half a brain would know that Billy.
Shit we’re in it
Labour were a swimming pool of radioactive fecal matter.
… on a good day.
they put some berroca in the radioactive fecal pool?
What? Altruism from the Labour party? A first …
Berocca apparently causes urine to turn deep yellow in colour because of vitamin B2 expulsion. Maybe Brown took some in Rochdale on 28 April?
Here’s a top tip, learnt from experience…
Berroca is not a replacement for orange juice when making vodka and orange.
Nice!
That pic is hideously white apart from the cock.
Perhaps it’s a decent school.
Must admit I noticed that, the first time round.
I thought Dudley was overrun with mosquerats.
The diversity tszar has obviously had them whited up to make it look multicultural.
Festive Cheer.
http://tinyurl.com/386r89q
that’s one ginger I wouldn’t discriminate against.
http://www.lazygirls
Yesterday I had too much fizzy orange and now I have a nappy rash.
I had some big cocks at a BBC party once…..
Merry Christmas
Tim Lovejoy
BBC legend.
You spelt leg-end wrong.
I love your socks
Oops, I love your cocks
100.
*cough*
TT , Am shocked , I didnt thought you would stoop to those levels
Merry Christmas aand Have a great new year.
Tony always has a great year, he’s fucking loaded.
Or 64 in hexadecimal.
4 in binary.
I do have some new batteries, if you need them, AC1. [1100100]
Reminds me of the old saw: There are three types of mathematician, those that can add up … and those who can’t.
Surely it’s
‘There are 10 types of people. Those that understand binary and those that don’t’.
*** claps ***
The Tuscan’s dart is no longer sitting plumb in the bullseye but is now firmly lodged in the frame of the picture six feet to the side of it.
As a result all the above commentary must be reworked.
Decimal…….: 106
Hexadecimal: 6A
Binary………: 1101010
and for those who are happiest using Octal, your number is 152.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-12080028
Airports should be fined for disruption, ministers say
So Government should be fined for road disruption, taxpayers say
Shit, Government means taxpayers
We are fucked , One socailist goverment after another .
Fuck cocks Billy, how would you like to see my trouser snake?
Now fining Bureaucrats for failing to keep roads open might be a different story.
Maybe they’d go on less one armed bereaved lesbian awareness courses if they actually lost pay for not doing the job.
Dorset County Council, £30,000 bonus for the Roads portfolio holder and they cant even grit the roads.
Come to think of it they don’t do very much. What do we pay Council tax for?
And don’t mention West Dorset District Council, £19,000,000 for new council offices but they can’t even collect rubbish. Their re-cycling scheme costs ratepayers £120 per tonne of rubbish (sorry-re cyclables) collected.
And Bedford Borough – does all the pious stuff about encouraging recycling but limits its collections to five bags a fortnight.
The gold standard no.69 went to Gordon Brown, but nice try.
I thought Hammond would be better. Unfortunately he has turned out to be as shit as the rest of them.
You mean he’s threatening shitty companies who don’t give a shit about customers and generally piss them off? If he stands by his threat what’s the problem?
Breaking News
Nick Clegg’s rallying cry to senior Lib Dems: “Treat the Tories as right wing arseholes, not friends”.
I don’t need Clegg to tell me that. He’s wrong however, the current lot aren’t right wing in the slightest.
Breaking Wind
I feel a right cock having to wear a dress everyday.
How is the all-woman job going you fucking twat?
Mr Scrooge brought us his cock! God bless us, every one.
A small cock could never stand up to a traditional Xmas Goose.
They obviously don’t call you tiny tim for nothing.
Look at the size of that cock! That will never do. That will not feed the starving children this Christmas. Bah Humbug!
Tories are renowned for their little peckers.
Yeah, they could never compete with Labours 1.4 Trillion.
+5 (trillion!)
Unofficial casption contest ! All in a days work for an MP
Now which one of you little girls would like to stroke my cock >
“Fine, sir, as long as you don’t ask me to blow it again. The feathers got stuck in my teeth last time.”
Children. Have you met the Prime minister?
Elliot and i both got butt plugs for xmas.Think we are going to need them if we end up in Bell (end) Marsh.
Anybody running a book on the sentence?
I’ll have a tenner on 3 years a piece.
Nah , Com service
Peerage each. If I can do it, we can do it.
I like to come dancing and not just strictly.
And sell Wales !
Fuck you GreenP*ace
what a bunch of twats
I told you Mr Scrooge, I will only look at your cock if you buy me sweeties.
Can you imagine what a grim and gloomy affair christmas day will have been at McDoom’s hovel yesterday? He’ll have had his bowl of porridge whilst watching a documentary on coal. Of course his beard and her sons will have spent the day elsewhere.
He could have sat in your bedsit and shared your Tesco xmas dinner for one.
It’s ok, Labour troll, we understand your pain at losing the election, and we love it. Run along and buy your copy of Beyond The Crash.
It’s ok, T*ry troll, we understand your pain at losing the election, and at having to form a government with the dogshooters, but run along and buy your copy of Dave’s big EU society.
LOL!
Tories came first and they lost? Nice one tat. You’ve been overdosing on the spaghetti ‘oops again.
I just came into a sock. Whose idea was that? Sue’s I think. I just punched my beard’s sons. Whose idea was that? Sue’s I think.
I just Bailed out the Euro and the Irish Bankers with £7 BILLION of UK taxpayers money. Whose idea was that ? Mine I think.
I just took it up the arse from Nick while SamCam was away munching Clare’s minge. Whose idea was that ? Nick’s I think.
Yap! Yap! Yap!
Jesus Christ, are CCHQ that dense?
As we look back on the events of the year, let us take a moment to pause and solemnly reflect on one particular moment that defined the year…and remember what an absolute fucking laugh we had.
How the hell did I know that those fuckers at sky had left my radio mic on?
What an absolutely awful , disastrous, embarrassing PM he was!!
You ain’t seen nothing yet!
He should look in his own
closetcabinet for further information.I gave the students carbolic soap for their Christmas present this year. Those pesky kids have been extremely nasty this year. Ho! Ho! Ho!
I am not looking forward to swinging from the end of Prisoner L14RS666 cock.
Bugger that! How do you feel about your house(s?) and bank accounts being taken away from you to pay for the thoroughly avoidable costs you incurred (and got the taxpayer to bankroll for you) over recent years?
I hope they charge you interest you utter Hunt.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
And court costs I hope.
I meant them too!
lordarcher got four years for his perjury and was let out in two. And spent it in a low security prison where they could walk out and about whenever they wanted.
how long is this joker going to get??! More to the point is he going to have to repay the £200k tha he got from the NOTW in damages?
because , if not, whatever is the point of the punishment??!!
Low security? No way, he’ll be allowed paper and pens to write another political book nobody will buy.
We hope tommy can join us in a christmas roast.3 honest Labour MP’s. , 2 butt plugs and 1 tube of Vaseline.Priceless.
3 Lying,cheating Labour MP’s,2 butt plugs and 1 tube of Vaseline.Priceless.
Tonight i will be stuffing an old bird
Merry jizzmas and a spunk filled new year.
Piss off you vile child shagging Pervert.
Gimme a chance, princess. I know I can make u happy.
I pledge never to vote Conservative again.
I blame Nick……….for everything going(well it seems to have worked ok so far). But I must make my New Years Resolutions …. and I feel that I must stop blaming Nick for all the Coalition policies so in 2011 I intend to blame Nick for only those that go wrong…what do you mean ? that’s all of them….well being in government is tough as I never stop telling him…….
I’ve just filled my christmas stocking.
Booyakasha! Ah wah gwanin? Me had an iree christmas, blud. Roast ryce and da peea, innit. Brrrrap! Big up and ting. Bogle Bogle.
I’m 200! Now can I be PM again?
No, you’ve dropped a nought again.
… and your nappy needs changing.
I’ve dropped a bollock.
Don’t worry, you can get by with one.
I see the Labourites, such as Guido Fawkes, are out in force again infecting this website
Don’t worry this is not an infection it is an anti Tory virus protection post. It is designed to protect the brain from the Tory serf virus, a most horrible virus, that makes even the most sensible of people into Tory drones, serving their masters like good little serfs should. Only a good injection of humanity, love for their fellow humans and not to mention the common wealth gene that makes everyone that little bit richer and doesn’t restrict the wealth to the masters of the Tory party. Have you had your protection yet Lord Ashcroft or do you have a terminal case of Tory serfdom. Good health Lord Ashcroft
If someone might like to explain to us what a Tory is, or even what they mistakenly believe a Tory to be, perhaps we might be able to make some sense of this twaddle.
Anyone attempting to respond should make it clear how they relate their definition of a Tory to this site and their host, to the contributors on the site and in addition explain what they understand the taxpayer should be required to do in respect of contributing to the responder’s personal position and those of his fellow political travellers.
Then, certainly I, and I expect others here will be able to make an informed view as to the responder’s motivations, integrity, state of mental health and purpose.
RSVP
No response. Thet are frit!
I think its almost impossible to define a Tory these days Moniker but whatever it’s complexion… optimism for the future under the Tories is preferable to the socialist alternative which has evolved no further than it did under Harold Wilson despite the New Labour tags.
Seasonals from the S of F and optimistic wishes for 2011.
Actually my book on modern serfdom was about socialism leading to serfdom….
The inherent vice of capitalism is the uneven division of blessings, while the inherent virtue of socialism is the equal division of misery.
Winston Churchill
Socialism is a philosophy of failure, the creed of ignorance, and the gospel of envy, its inherent virtue is the equal sharing of misery.
Winston Churchill
We’ll could fight them on the beaches …but can we wait until its a bit warmer ?
‘We could.’ ….stupid boy
Don’t think he got the bit about ‘equal sharing of misery’ quite right.
He obviously hadn’t heard of Sham-Pain Socialism.
I don’t know why he’s holding his cock so tightly, that chick is clearly to young to fly.
David Cameron walks into a pub with a black and white decorative theme.
Bar Humbug!
Prezza has gone back to his roots and is working on a cruise ship.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1341735/Why-Prezzas-ship-shape–First-risque-jokes-upset-fellow-cruise-passengers-Now-norovirus.html
It’s not norovirus; it’s a Christmas bulimia session brought on by all these free pies.
John & Pauline Prescott ( wearing my clothes )
what a prize piece of work prezza is…how on earth did this moron of a man get where he has.
It,s easy. look at me. The political system is so easy to exploit. You can spend your whole life enriching yourself through the taxpayer. You don’t have to do any work, you can use taxpayer’s money to pay off cronies and the wife, fiddle your expenses, earn more money from foreign Governments and be provided with as much free sex as you want throughout, just by providing a bit of information. It’s a great life and you stupid mugs are paying for it. I have never had a proper job and I am extremely rich. Off to my luxury villa in Spain now, then to St Petersburg for the children.
How about taking me with you Handy, my husband is getting a bit past it?
Sorry, you are about 60 years too old and not Russian or Romanian my princess. I like a wet one.
The name is COCK, HANDYCOCK.
I would demand a refund If I was a passenger on that cruise.
When Ed Milupa shows his cock to kids, he has to point out it is called Dave…
Then you grasp yer Liberal Demorcat’s firmly like this, twist and pull ….and the jobs done
My God, what an incredible cock. And what’s that bird he’s holding?
Lembit Grope-it Opik showed his cock when blotto ( no change there ) in Crystal’s night club in Newtown just a few weeks before the election. Just on eof the reasons he lost his seat…….
cock shows his Tory mp to kids.
I am shocked by this photograph.
After watching the BBC news for so long I was convinced that there were NO white kids left in education now.
Then you grasp yer Liberal Demorcat’s firmly like this, twist and pull ….and the jobs done
Motor Caravan Insurance