December 24th, 2010

12 Days of Guido – Remember that Election?


  1. 1
    Chator & Morley says:

    What a great time it was.Prison was just a place where ordinary people went.

  2. 2
    Lord Hanningfield says:

    Those were the days.

  3. 3
    Lord Taylor of Warwick says:

    Brings a tear to one’s eye.

  4. 4
    Gordon Brown says:

    Today I will be the baby jesus.

  5. 5
    Chator & Morley says:

    Jim Sheridan is another honest Labour MP.Elliot and i are right behind him,as long as we are in differnt cells.

  6. 6
    Wavy Davy says:

    Today I won’t sack any Liberal Democrats, even if they call me a cun’t.

  7. 7
    Lord Hanningfield says:

    I shall tell Lord Archer of this Christmas miracle.

  8. 8
    COYS says:

    Jap eye?

  9. 9
    Gordon Brown is a cunt who needs a gallon of fizzy orange rammed up his bot bot says:

    Hello Mr Wuv and Winkie. Are you a new Crossbow Cannibal in waiting? You know, a sad lonely loser who finally goes beserk?

  10. 10
    Anonymous says:

    At least he not a liar like Cameron or Clegg, these two will rip you underwear off if you go near them, you will not even realise it.

  11. 11
    Smig says:

    You can’t even get that right. It’s TOMORROW you bong-eyed, incompetent, jockinese waste of DNA.

  12. 12
    First version of this year's Queen's Christmas Message says:

    “This year, you finally got rid of that awful fucking mong Brown. Took you long enough. I was on the verge of kicking the fucker out myself.”

  13. 13
    Smig says:

    The past wasn’t so bad.

    Then a bunch of thieves and charlatans convinced the rest of us that money was a great idea.

  14. 14
    Old Arsehole says:

    Up for some fingering and banging up 16yr old schoolboys this Crimbo, Gaydo? Meet up usual place?

  15. 15
    Berlusconi says:

    At least he fucks women, not boys.

  16. 16
    a new low says:

    Gordon Brown: a hero of 2010 for his dignity in defeat.

    We all know he was a flawed PM, but Britain needs Gordon Brown’s faith in international economic co-operation.

    Fucking hell the twats at the Grauniad are as deluded as the Hunt himself.

  17. 17
    a new low says:

    • This article will be open to comments from 9am

    09:10 – No it won’t, they still can’t bring themselves to open it up to comments.

  18. 18
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin says:


  19. 19
    Gordon Brown is the Jobby Master says:

    I’ve got a comment or two for them.

  20. 20
    Smig says:

    Second draft:

    My loyal subjects. It is with great happiness and joy that I have instructed my loyal and most courageous generals and chiefs of staff to instigate a military coup.

    We have at this time placed all members of the cabinet under house arrest pending execution for treason. For too long and with great sadness I have watched our most noble and sovereign nation be whittled down to a shell of its former self.

    Please remain calm at this time. Eastenders will follow this broadcast and your Christmas Day will carry on as normal. Please take time to celebrate that we are about to free ourselves of the insidious and evil European Union.

    Fellow Heads of State throughout Europe will be joining me in a conference call to discuss the termination of the European Superstate Project. Those with strong economies will be offered the opportunity to rid themselves of the Euro and join the Pound.

    You may witness some of your neighbours being questioned at length by military and civil police forces. Do not be alarmed. We seek only to rid ourselves of the cancer of socialism.

    There will be hard times ahead, but we will triumph over the tyranny of New Labour and Blue Labour. Britain will once again be great.

    I wish you all a very happy Christmas.

  21. 21
    Gordon Brown is the Jobby Master says:

    I genuinely tried to read that but lost the will to live within a few sentences. Not so much an opinion piece as a stomach turning hagiography. I almost threw up.

  22. 22
    CallMeDave, Billy 'traitor' Vague, Osborne & chums says:

    British windmills from Tory companies for British hillsides and British waters.

  23. 23
    Gordon Brown is the Jobby Master says:

    Surely you mean British jobbies, Gordon?

  24. 24
    Socialists = Sociopaths says:

    ‘Flawed’ ?? He should have been floored ten years ago and we wouldn’t have been in such a mess now.

    Forget his (a)moral compass; he should have used an accurate calculator.

  25. 25
    I'm not happy says:

  26. 26
    Ken Clarke - EU loving idiot says:

    Sorry, no more room at the Inn. They’ll have to be given community sentences.

  27. 27
    Sally Bigcow says:

    What a jumped up little twerp.

  28. 28
    Court of Public Opinion says:

    Who the hell does that dwarf pipsqueak think he is? What an embarrassment to the position.

  29. 29
    Donkeydong says:

    Ahh shaddap shortround before I slap you round the face with Bubbles deVere’s bingowings.

  30. 30
    Tom Tomos says:

    Guido, who is Guy New? Are you going to make it a New Year’s Resolution to get a grip of apostrophes?

  31. 31
    John Bercow says:

    Order! The honourable gentleman has no business scurrying out of the chamber…oh fuck it, I’m off home to get a blowjob from Sally.

  32. 32
    Spank Sinatra says:

    Awww – cut him some slack. He’s probably started on the sherry.

    A Cool Yule to one & all etc

  33. 33
    Centre Parting says:

    Anyone else think the Pope sounds like a friend of Chris Bryant?

  34. 34
    Anonymous says:

    Can’t trust the hired help these days. Harry is a bit slack if you hadn’t noticed.

  35. 35

    I agree with saint Nick

  36. 36
    jgm2 says:

    Lay off the Rohipnol and you might notice it.

  37. 37
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Infamy! Infamy! There’s no room at the Infamy!

    Happy Christmas and a prosperous New Year even for TaT and Fabian Droids.

  38. 38

    When the wise men bring you a gift gold, please try not to sell it off at the bottom of the market.

  39. 39
    The Beast of Christmas past says:

    From that film it is sooooooo obvious that Tory Bear is one of Boris Johnsons many love children

  40. 40
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    There are no firms in the UK making windmills – Pillock

  41. 41
    Hello Boys! says:

  42. 42
    Sir William Waad says:

    I wish he would wear the Speaker’s traditional wig and robes. It would give him more gravitas and hide a substantial part of his face.

  43. 43
    Sir William Waad says:

    Merry Christmas everbody and, if you’re driving today, put that laptop down and concentrate on the road!

  44. 44
    Anonymous says:

    How much longer do we have to put up with this arrogant BERK?

  45. 45
    Court of Public Opinion says:

    It doesn’t matter where they are made, follow the money. Dolt.

  46. 46
    The Beast of Christmas past says:

    Fond of adoring crowds
    Like to dress up
    Orders must be followed
    Surrounds himself with large men in uniform
    Drives about in an armoured car
    Head of state
    Likes to straighten his arm out from balconies and cars
    All good things but I don’t think he has ever posed in his manky Y fronts on Gaydar

  47. 47
    Lil Olmey says:

    Surely that’s Uncle Fester ?

  48. 48
    Ed Milliband says:

    At least until I’ve had a good spanking at the next election.

  49. 49
  50. 50
    Vote Sally says:

    How can he be bigcow when he is not a wimmin. Nor particularly tall.

  51. 51
    Vote Sally says:

    Think of how much she would to kneel down for tat?!

  52. 52
    anonymous says:

    just like to wish all the politicians tuning in a very merry fuck off you sleasy bastard sort of christmas – we’ll get you you criminals

  53. 53
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am Mr Motivator.

  54. 54
  55. 55
    FUK U HO says:

    Harrow !
    We send you ten mirrion viagra tabrets
    coz u hav trouble wiv your erections

  56. 56
    SkyDesk says:

    hey, we know you’re having problems travelling but our main news today is about a woman who has been killed by a dog in London – can only happen here in the capital eh! When interviewed the dog’s parents said it was a bit ruff but that their dogchild (name withheld for dog protection reasons) was a nice little doggy

  57. 57

    And Remember Dont Drink and Drive

    as you tend to spill it when you change gear

  58. 58
    Yap! Yap! Yap! little CCHQ poodle says:

  59. 59

    Today I will be wanking off to pictures of Dave.

  60. 60
  61. 61

    Keep that Nazi kiddie fiddler away from those children !

  62. 62

    Dont you mean
    I’m off home to suck SDallys Dick ?

  63. 63
    GORDON tiggywinkle McPOTTY says:

    Sarah Sarah look !
    I’ve laid an egg

  64. 64
    Murdocks Press says:

    Tommy Sheridan heading back to prison.

  65. 65
    GEOFF HOON 07796938196 says:

    Anybody wanting to wish “The right Hoonourable Geoff Hoon ”
    A Merry Christmas and a very prosperous new year
    give him a ring his number is 07796938196

    i’m sure he would love to hear from you !

  66. 66
    MI7 says:

    Is that really his number? How did you get it?

  67. 67

    I hope it didn’t chew up her Burbury baseball cap !

  68. 68

    Dignity in Defeat ! My arse
    he stayed locked in Downing street for ten fuckin days
    while his scum sucking leaches like Mandelscum tried in desperation to worm a deal out of the Glib-Dems
    before he was forced to leave
    there was No dignity there !

  69. 69
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Only 47 comments so far.

    Did McMental pen the article himself. Sycophantic nonsense, Brown’s departure was stage managed, no questions from the press, used his kids as human shields.

    He doesn’t vote, he is never seen in public, he wasn’t in London for a wedding this week. Did the family only invite Sarah? Is the Hunt in a secure ward or in a safe house 24/7.

    Perhaps he is only seen watching Raith Rovers, yet no-one appears to have the balls to Tweet that they have seen Gordon.

    But why no pictures of he great man since his well earned electoral disaster? Brown is hidden away from the public.

  70. 70
    Archer Karcher says:

    Ah, that would be Chermany by the Chermanians with billions of British taxpayers pounds. The good news is that the power companies are Cherman and Franch too, so they get billions more in subsidies from the British taxpayers. But just to make it entirely fair, non renewable sources must pay extra carbon taxes forcing up the price of British coal, so as to make ‘renewables’ competitive. Good game eh? I believe the phrase is ‘all in it together’.

  71. 71
    genghiz the kahn says:

    British windmills for British power from British hillsides and British waters.

    But there is no British wind for British windmills in freezing winter fogs.

  72. 72
    MI7 says:

    Not a liar lol. All politicians are fucking liars

  73. 73
    Lil Olmey says:

    Better yet, he should adopt the new tradition and wear a burqa – then we wouldn’t be able to see his face at all.

  74. 74
    Archer Karcher says:

    From the stupid Hoon himself. He put it on his company card.

  75. 75
    No Pasaran says:

    Wavy Davy sings The Little Xmas Tree.

    “Oh xmas tree, oh xmas tree, what gifts are at your trunk for me ?”

    The xmas tree then shimmered bright. And formed a message in the light.

    “For you I give a pair of balls, your spineless ways do quite appall”
    “You need to fight the locust swarm. Of EU crap and ‘global warm'”
    “You need to bludgeon SDPs. Or they’ll sink you when voters freeze”
    “We trees are used to dogs’ cocked legs. But Britons fight when told to beg…”

  76. 76
    More English stupidity says:

    who the fuck is JIM Sheridan you muppet ?

  77. 77
    jgm2 says:

    I agree with Nick Griffin.

  78. 78
    Anonymous says:

    He then used his family when he finally left the bunker

  79. 79
    Eco Dave says:

    George, GEORGE look!! Nick Clegg is giving me a bullyramming.

  80. 80
    Bamber Cote de Gascogne says:

    in Draft 3 make sure you mention climate change..

  81. 81
    Bamber Cote de Gascogne says:

    has he said anything about climate change?

  82. 82
  83. 83

    Yes! google Taylorhoon strategy (his new company )
    and his mobile number is on there !

  84. 84
    Mr Slater's Parrot says:

    SQUWAAAARRRKK!!! (flaps) +1!

  85. 85
    The 'original' Hoon says:

    And his think tank/lobbying/rip you off company webshite.

  86. 86
  87. 87
    Archer Karcher says:

    Very probably, I don’t pay much attention to the lying scumbag though. Like McRuin, anytime his face appears onscreen, I reach instinctively for the remote.

  88. 88
    Gordon Brown says:

    If only I hadn’t chosen the red pill. It’s all Sarah’s fault.

  89. 89
    The Conservative's Glory Years....when we believed anything was possible says:

    Nobody agrees with Nick ;Brown has performed his greatest “McAvity” Impersonation ever and “Dave” given the “Premiership” fails to convince his party or country…………………………..meanwhile storm clouds gather over the Coalition and the year that promised so much ends in a frozen paralysis of riots,,dissent and paranoia

  90. 90
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    Get over yourself. Its not as if its an insult to Scotland to not know the loopiest so-called politician in Scotland.

    hahahahhha ha. and your answer … an MP for a constituency only 20 miles from Troon. “James Sheridan (born 24 November 1952) is a British Labour Party politician who has been the Member of Parliament (MP) for Paisley & Renfrewshire North since 2005.”

    On the other hand, apart from a big TV he’s not been fingered for expenses.

    “Asked by The Daily Telegraph about his expense claims, he said his constituency was too far from London to commute.”

  91. 91
    Unsworth says:

    Which particular 9am did they have in mind?

  92. 92
    Sres says:

    I’d forgotten about the car crash at that opening event… haha summed up the Labour campaign

  93. 93
    Last Days of Tiramisu says:

    I see the queen is earning her keep this year by commenting on sport in her christmas message to the weary and forlorn of UK. Well that’s a thrill. She’ll be guest pundit on Match of the Day soon. FFS get rid of them

  94. 94
    Gordon Brown is a cunt says:

    Has anyone here actually called or sent a text and spoken to him or got a response?

  95. 95

    Can you make the trains run on time?

  96. 96
    Unsworth says:

    Yep, that was an entertaining if predictable set-piece.

    Still, he gets to spend his Christmas with his little girl then – despite all that bollocks to the Judge. And with his wife, of course, or maybe he’ll try someone else’s wife for a change.

    Next we’ll him and his claque all screaming that the Judge is biased and that his sentence is solely politically motivated. Pillocks.

  97. 97
    jgm2 says:


    Tell the kids. Santa’s coming…

  98. 98
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    If a week is a long time in politics ………

  99. 99
    They're all Hoons says:

    Currently generating a whopping 1% of UK power requirements.

  100. 100
    The Queen's Speech Draft 4 says:

    I am no longer your sovereign, I have abdicated my responsiblities and duties to the EU.

  101. 101
    Up shit creek says:

    On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me… a coalition love-in DVD…..

  102. 102
    Up shit creek says:

    On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me… two coalition partners, and a coalition love-in DVD.

  103. 103
    ex Bishop of Southwark says:

    Don’t you know who I used to be?

  104. 104
    In Soviet Russia says:

    perjury guilty of Tommy Sheridan!

  105. 105
    Gordon Brown says:

    Tonight I’ll be Santa.

  106. 106
    Gordon Brown says:

    Tomorrow I will be Harriet Harman.

  107. 107
    Handycock says:

    The Judge was quite clearly biased, nevertheless, it gives me the chance of a crack at his wife, whilst he is banged up. Tommy should have joined the Masons and he would not be in this situation now.

  108. 108
    Tessa Tickles says:

    To be fair, he isn’t related to any of them.

  109. 109
    GORDON tiggywinkle McPOTTY says:

    Tonight while Sarah is sleeping
    I will empty my sack into her stockings

  110. 110
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Vince thread :

  111. 111
    GORDON tiggywinkle McPOTTY says:

    Nick Clegg is overjoyed at his present from the Camerons !

  112. 112
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Daddy! Daddy! Why do the video’s of Santa’s progress have “(C) Copyright 2008″ at the bottom?

  113. 113

    You forget to add MP to your stalking post.
    Try and get into a good shelter for Christmas ‘cityshitters’. The human company will do you good.

    Merry Wintervral or whatever your Fabian Comrades are calling it now.
    Anyway, whatever it is, have a good one.

  114. 114
    Opiate of the people says:

    “…of riots,,dissent and paranoia..”

    but enough about my addled brain, how are you all doing?

  115. 115
    Come on the Aussies says:

    who said it was an insult to Scotland you chippy little Englander ??? Yous guys are clearly shitting yourself at the thought of the 4th test and are still smarting about getting arse fucked by that nice mr blatter.

  116. 116
    The curse of Cameron says:

    Come on England !

  117. 117
    PD77 says:

    I thought it was Sue?

  118. 118
    Top Telegraph Totty says:

    BREAKING : Lib Dem Danny Alexander claims in Telegraph sting that “Osborne is basically King Herod”, while Lynne Featherstone claims she is “the penicillin to Theresa May’s bacteria”

  119. 119
    where is it? says:

    No caption comp this week? Come on Guido, we’re more important than wrapping presents and defrosting a goose.

  120. 120
    Al says:

    Only poodle on here is you with your dull paid by the post troll shit.

    You may go.

  121. 121
  122. 122
    Clarence says:

    Surreal moment of the year: just spotted Ed Balls and Yvette Cooper wandering down Alton High Street. He looked thoroughly hacked off; she looked flustered.

    He has a very large head although he looked comparatively normal. No one paid them the slightest bit of attention – that must have hurt his ego.

    He was carrying a red plastic sledge under his arm. I wonder if he will claim it against his Parliamentary expenses?

  123. 123
    Squeaker beaker says:

    polythene bag with a necktie would be even better still

  124. 124
    Squeaker beaker says:

    Smig you twat thats the point he gets everything wrong bit like ..well you really

  125. 125
    The Diary of the wife of a full time MP says:

  126. 126
    South of the M4 says:

    That’s funny because I doubt any of them will be thinking of you.

  127. 127
    Gordon Brown is a cunt says:

    Bill, he’s the psychotic freak who calls everyone Tory lickspittles and poodles and repeats the words “yap” and “whining” tediously and monomaniacally and then resorts to stealing other people’s monikers because he thinks everyone is his enemy. Total sad fuckwit who’s either very lonely or lives with his elderly parents.

  128. 128
    David Milliband says:

    Remeber that erection ? Sadly not.

  129. 129
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:

    No doubt you will be cracking one off up some dark back passage, saddo !!

  130. 130
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:

    Sorry, above comment was for comment 14 “old Arsehole”…….. Merry Christmas !

  131. 131
    More Aussie stupidity. says:

    What the FUCK are you on about you muppet?

  132. 132

    Christopher Booker reported earlier this week that the current output was 0.2% averaged over the cold spell, when there was little or no wind.

    Contrast that with the 2-3% that we were importing from France, and it seems that the ‘rush for wind’ is just so much Huhnery.

  133. 133
    Ratsniffer says:

    “He was carrying a red plastic sledge under his arm”

    Sledging conditions are particularly favourable on top of beachy head right now…

  134. 134
    Festive Firkin says:

    love the way the lib dims always try to take the moral high ground, like they are some sort of saviours instead of sad nonentities.

  135. 135
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    And the MCG

  136. 136
    who's shooting santa? says:

    daddy daddy what are all those streaking things across the sky when santa stops over a town and makes the deliveries….they looks like tracer fire! daddy what scumbags are trying to shoot down santa?

  137. 137
  138. 138
    Sarah says:

    You try that, and I’ll ram a 13 inch spikey strapon up your festering, putrid poo pipe.

  139. 139
    Anonymous says:

    Don’t you mean Uncle Pester?

  140. 140
    Guido Tweet says:

    “When a 3-year-old specifies what she wants with the degree of precision that Ms Fawkes did… failure is not an option for Santa Claus.”

  141. 141
    Anonymous says:

    Heater Mills parents have bought her a new wooden leg for Christmas. It isn’t her main present – just a stocking filler!!!!

  142. 142
    13eastie says:

    Only 120 days ’til Good Friday.

    Crucification? Good. One cross each…

  143. 143
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    I read someone that even though disappointment is good for kids, you shouldn’t engineer such situations. Kids will get enough disappointment naturally. Especially if you buy it online when theres daily snowstorm.

  144. 144
    Anonymous says:

    Hilarious. I want the raygun used by Dave to cut Cable down to size. Not sure about their portrayal of RedEd as an eagle eyed assassin though.

  145. 145
    13eastie says:

  146. 146
    A Gentleman Rioter says:

    He’s approaching Hanoi, Vietnam with military precision right now.

    Err, Santa, that is. Not Fawkes.

  147. 147
    13eastie says:

  148. 148
    Twatter Control says:

    Thinking of all the families who have lost loved ones in Liebour’s illegal wars in Iraq and Afghanistan too ???

  149. 149
    @ Ed Miliband says:

    Ewa is sure that, in real life, you is a really nice and decent guy , Ed , honey x .

    Havin said that , pleeeze fuck off an die , darlin .

    Shalom E xx .

  150. 150
    @ Ed Miliband says:

    Fuck it -should know how to post on here by now !!

    Ewa is sure that, in real life, you is a really nice and decent guy , Ed , honey x .

    Havin said that , pleeeze fuck off an die , darlin .

    Shalom E xx .

  151. 151
    The ModBot says:

    This site is Kerrrplunked.

  152. 152
    Chator & Morley says:

    When he’s not perjuring or pimping we call him tommy.Jim is his lying,cheating and dishonest Labour MP name.

  153. 153
    Mr Cameron, Chief Afghan heroin says:

    Free Afghan heroin for everyone, my treat!

  154. 154
    Scrouge Cameron PM says:

    Hi everyone

    just popped by to remind you VAT is going up soon – so have a good Christmas, I know I will … hohoho

  155. 155
    Mad, Bad & Dangerous Gordon McRuin says:

    Hey !! It started in America under Tony’s watch !!

  156. 156
    I Hate New Labour says:

    A timely reminder that most of what those three scum bags uttered was a complete lie.

    Their grasp for power was the only thing they cared about.

    I wish them all an exceedingly unpleasant 2011.

  157. 157
    tolpuddlemartyr says:

    Don’t remind me!

  158. 158
    Vince Clayballs says:

    Thooo Daygh
    I is mowstly trying to kheep mhy fhoot out of myh mowff

  159. 159
    smoggie says:

    If that mutt is a poodle then I’M tat

  160. 160
    smoggie says:

    Today you won’t be starting your own blog

  161. 161
    IfIt Wasn'tSoSeriousItWouldBeFunny says:

    And the Conservatives still couldn’t get an overall majority, the plonkers.

  162. 162
    smoggie says:

    The wimp is in in denial.

  163. 163
    smoggie says:

    ..or, worse, lives in fucking Guildford.

  164. 164
    Madness says:

    The only decent thing we ever got from Scotland was the crankies.

  165. 165
    Myrtle Lemon says:

    Cumin Basil, if you’re sage enough, and tell us how Mussolini made a train run on thyme.

  166. 166
    smoggie says:

    Labour out, job done.

  167. 167
    smoggie says:

    Rather get rid of you, ya mingebag

  168. 168
    not in my name says:

    YOU pay for them then you douche bag.

  169. 169
    EU, bailouts, nannying, muzzies, corrupt MPs & me? No thanks. says:

    Are they the very same wars the compliant Conservatives voted for too? The whole Parliamentary estate was masturbating itself in to a war footing yet a million people in London tried to tell them the error of their ways, and they all refused to listen. Of course the 646 people inside decided they knew better.

    How good is that?

  170. 170
    Polly Toynbee's dildo says:

    Normally I post as Ruth Kelly’s plaything, but that i/d attracts constant modding so I thought that, in the festive spirit, we might imagine that Ruth may have passed on her trusty orgasmist to a friend.

    The point was that I’d like to wish everyone on here a merry Christmas and a happy new year. It being Christmas I make no exceptions, even for TAT and London M/u/s/l/i/m – afficionados will recognise how far that stretches Christian charity.

    Best wishes to you, too, Guido, for giving the platform for all the fun and games we have here.

    My usual misanthropy will return on January 2nd.

  171. 171
    Polly Toynbee's dildo says:

    Didn’t work – I got modded!

  172. 172
    smoggie says:

    No I don’t, numbnutz.

  173. 173
    TaT the mental case says:

    Where’s the blog Tat you cowardly shitbag ?

  174. 174
    Al = TaT says:

    9/11 was an inside job by the spacelizards!! WHOOP!! WHOOOP! WHOOOOOP!

  175. 175
    jgm2 says:

    I agree with Nick Griffin!

  176. 176




  177. 177
    Afghan heroin before foreign troops invaded zero, since occupation number 1 heroin producer in world says:

    You are definitely not tat, tat is a hero, you are a cripple who cannot control your own bowels.

  178. 178
    Afghan heroin before foreign troops invaded zero, since occupation number 1 heroin producer in world says:

    So that’s all right then, let’s just keep that Afghan heroin coming, eH?

  179. 179
    173's Nurse says:

    Yes, that’s right dear, now if you could just go back into your lovely room with its special thick padded wallpaper and put this comfy jacket on and everything will be okay.

  180. 180
    Prime Minister of Great Britain (Liar and Expense Thief:First Class) says:

    I would like to make the following important yuletide statement:

    The person held in Afghanistan is a member of the Iranian Republican Army…eh, he’s not? But the Times said he was….shit.

    Great Britain was the junior partner in the Battle of Britain…what, we weren’t? We stood alone against the Nazi hordes… fuck.

    Iran has nuclear weapons… hold on a minute….they don’t? Oh for fuck’s sake Andy, I know you were a wizz at tapping people’s phones but your intel is just fucking woeful. Stop making me look like a dozey c unt or you are sacked you useless fuck.

    My name’s Dave, I am a liar and benefit fraudster (TRUE)

    Merry Christmas everyone!

  181. 181
    Santa says:

    How come on Christmas eve the telly is ALWAYS shite?

  182. 182
    My Name's Fawkes, I haven't got any views of my own says:

    Remember the last election? FFS Guido, you can barely remember your last instructions from Conservative HQ without fucking it up.

  183. 183
    The Queen (You can call me Madge) says:

    I have abdicated my sovereign duties.
    They have now been transferred to the EU and you are all now EU subjects and not British subjects.

    Awfully sorry about that.

  184. 184
    Gideon Osborne Chancellor and Benefit Fraudster who stole public funds says:

    Well done Tory troll, keep banging on about the last adminsitration so nobody notices what a fuck up I am making of this one.


  185. 185
    We Are Tories We Love War Working Class People Die in Wars Lovely says:

    More Tories voted for the Iraq war than Labour ones.

    Says a lot about the Tories and what a bunch of war criminals they are.

  186. 186
    Gordon Brown (Still Prime Minister) says:

    The one I so convincingly won in May to be returned as Prime Minister? Of course I do

  187. 187
    Dr David Viner senior research scientist at the climatic research unit 20 March 2000 says:

    “Children just aren’t going to know what snow is,”

  188. 188
    Celine Dion, Eh says:

    Oh Canada on point two above

  189. 189
    Richard Timney says:

    Jacqui won’t let me forget!

  190. 190
    Cameron's Choice says:

    The Taliban’s Tet Offensive has begun.

    We either stop wasting our soldiers’ lives on the doomed American occupation of Afghanstan or we send more body bags.

    Time to go.

  191. 191
    An inconvenient truth from the BBC says:

    Afghanistan’s crop of 3,656 metric tons accounted for 72% of the world’s illicit opium in 2000.

  192. 192
    nell says:

    C’mon ewanme ed has just stabbed his bro in the back. The last thing he is , is a nice and decent guy!!!

    However it’s Xmas.

    Let’s wish them both, and tommy sheridan, and the student rioters including aaron porter, and the rest of the left wing world, a Happy Xmas!!!

  193. 193
    Anonymous Misogynist says:

    nell…Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year….

  194. 194
    nell says:

    You too Darling. Have a Great Day!!

  195. 195
    nell says:

    Happy Christmas and loadsalove to Everybody!!

    Have a Really Good Day tomorrow!!

  196. 196
    Gordon Brown says:

    Tonight I’ll be bathing my boys.

  197. 197
    Xmas Fairy says:

    To all the regulars on the blog, Merry Xmas. x

  198. 198
    cheesy knob says:

    merry xmas guido

    awesome website

  199. 199
    AC1 says:

    Merry Xmas Guido

  200. 200
    AC1 says:

    I wonder who controls the volume of debt???

    Is it
    a) Banks
    b) The regulator one Gordo Brown, who called the debtapocolype economic growth?

    If you answered (a), I suggest you stop thinking the BBC has any informational content.

  201. 201
    thick arse thief says:

    Sorry, I’m projecting again. I just can’t seem to rise to the occasion over EdM.

  202. 202
    Mandy says:

    Democracy? Don’t talk to me about democracy.
    Were it not for democracy, New Labour wouldn’t have been strangled at birth.

  203. 203
    AC1 says:

    Well I hope the Taliban is as militarily successful as the Tet offensive was for the VC…

    Namely 80% casualties and no ground gained…

    This time we the MSM won’t be able to lie.

  204. 204
    Cameron's Choice says:

    The Taliban have obviously decided they would continue to take casualties anyway from the American cowards hiding in the Nevada desert remotely controlling drones that drop bombs on Afghan weddings so they might as well take the Yanks head on. And as you know, the Tet Offensive led to the Americans running away from Vietnam with their tails between their legs, as will happen in Afghanistan.

    It is called bravery, AC1. Something you know nothing about.

    Merry Christmas coward.

  205. 205
    AC1's fixed narrative is falling apart says:

    The financial meltdown was lender induced.

    That is a fact. Which torpedoes your argument.

    Merry Christmas dimwit.

  206. 206
    Afghan Heroin Exports Run and Profited from by the CIA to fund black ops says:

    According to the US State Department *guffaw*

    Not according to the United Nations who in praised the Taliban for their successful poppy eradication programme.

    And just because that false propaganda was regurgatated by the BBC you believe it?

    Silly boy.

    The figures you offer are false. Nice try though.

    Today, Afghan heroin accounts for 93% of all the heroin in the world, since the occupation the exportation of heroin has risen by 800%.

    It is good to see that I have scared the fucking shit out of CIA stooges like you to such a degree that you felt the need to come here and post your false propaganda.

    I win, you lose.

  207. 207
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’d like to wish everyone a merry christmas. I look forward to serving as your prime minister for another year.

  208. 208
    Tin Foil Tat Watch says:

    178 is too fucking stupid to realise he’s being mocked

  209. 209




























  210. 210
    Tapestry says:

    The lizards bit is so ridiculous that you reject the 911 inside job bit as well. This is classic managed dissent. You seem to have fallen for it. Or you are part of it.

  211. 211
    Tapestry says:

    Pope’s Christmas Message – Child Rape Is Normal. Happy Christmas, Everybody.

  212. 212
    Tapestry says:

    The Pope’s ensuring that Christmas will be miserable for many people this year by advocating things he shouldn’t be.

  213. 213
    The Polar Express says:

    Oh dear…..yet another research thesis trashed !!!!! At this rate they’ll all have to return their “Doctorates”

  214. 214
    Only seen in public when dosed up to the max says:

    ‘secure ward or in a safe house 24/7?’

    Secure ward.

  215. 215
    Archer Karcher says:

    That 0.2% is with thousands of the useless things dotted about the country and surrounding sea, all generating jack shit.
    Still we can look forward to a time when we have tens of thousands, all generating jack shit and ‘earning’ their owners billions in subsidy, if they are working or not.
    It used to be called extortion, now it’s called renewable energy.

  216. 216
    Tapestry says:

    Whatever he looks like, read the words of his Christmas message – unbelievable –

    He is justifying child rape as normal behaviour……

  217. 217
    smoggie says:

    You can’t even spell Afghanistan. Some expert, huh!

  218. 218
    smoggie says:

    Tat is an obsessive spacker. It is well known.

  219. 219
    smoggie says:

    Whatever happened to Global Warming? I blame the greedy bankers.

  220. 220
    Charles Kennedy says:

    I’ll drink to that.

    Whatever that is.

  221. 221

    Can anybody give me a link to the posts after this one
    i dont know if it’s my computer thats fucked up or this blog
    i had later posts yesterday but lost them and since have not been able to get them back

  222. 222
    Red Breasted Robin says:

    Happy Christmas Guido, hope you have fun emptying your sacks :D

  223. 223
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Merry Christmas Guido and all that read the site , I hope Santa brought you everything you wanted.

  224. 224
    Ratsniffer says:

    The prezzies have been opened…the turkey is in the oven…the champagne is chilling. Am relaxing for five minutes peace away from the mother in law. Happy christmas, one and all.

  225. 225
    Ratsniffer says:

    The prezzies have been opened…the t urkey is in the oven…the ch ampagne is chilling. Am getting five minutes peace away from the mother in l aw. Happy christmas, one and all.

  226. 226
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Vince thread below .

  227. 227
  228. 228
    One of the great mysteries of the universe ........... says:

    Happens all the while…it’s the blog most times. You could try clearing your “cache” and re-loading page to see if that works..or just leave it and 90% of the time when you click on site again in bookmarks the later thread will appear as if by magic.It’s one of Guidos quirks and a complete mystery…..much like his comments sequencing which goes haywire quite regularly and his “modbot” which is a complete law unto itself letting profanities through but stopping quite innocent phrases

  229. 229
    P Jones says:

    Coming down from the trees wasn’t such a smart move either.

  230. 230
    One of the great mysteries of the universe ........... says:

    See ? No rhyme or reason to it …………

  231. 231
    Gordon o' the Steamin' Breeks says:


  232. 232
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    The Guardian are still on fuckin drugs

  233. 233
    Slot Gob says:

    Here is a christmas message for Tony b LIAR.

    I hope you die in agony you fucking lying scheming thieving murdering money grabbing Hunt of a war criminal, you killed 700.000 innocent men women and children.

  234. 234


  235. 235

    As i posted before absolutly no dignity in defeat
    after baracading himself into no10 because he lost the election he had people actually going round telling the world that even though he didn’t win the party that did didn’t have an overall majority so he was not going anywhere and he had scum like Mandelson Straw and others trying to strike a deal wiith Clegg just so he could stay there
    a vile man !

  236. 236
    Tom Baldwin says:

    Guido Fawkes would like to wish a happy christmas to you all, along with a happy new year, hopefuly one in which Labour will retake control of our great country

  237. 237
    Postlethwaite says:


  238. 238
    Postlethwaite says:

    He mentioned the w-word – yes wikileaks, he did, he did !

  239. 239

    Did you get those new tyres for your wheelchair TAT ?
    you spacker !

  240. 240
    Cameron Drinks Troops' Blood Fucking Vampire says:

    And a Merry Christmas to you too Smoggie you miserable manic depressive c unt!

  241. 241
    Cameron Drinks Troops' Blood Fucking Vampire says:

    As i posted before absolutly no dignity in defeat
    after Cameron baracaded himself into no10 having failed to win the election he had people actually going round telling the world that even though he didn’t win the party that did didn’t have an overall majority so he was not going anywhere and he had scum like Andy Coulson and Steve Hiltron and others trying to strike a deal wiith Clegg just so he could stay there
    a vile man !

  242. 242
    So Sad Too Bad says:

    Tin foil Watch is too fucking stupid to realise everyone is laughing at him and think he is a twat.

  243. 243
    Gordon Brown says:

    Today i will be Frosty the Snowman.

  244. 244
    Gordon Brown is a cunt says:

    No. Gordon’s still alive.

  245. 245
    In celebration of Blair's Human Rights Act says:

    AND …….no doubt a nice little damages claim will follow against the UK government if they try to deport him back to Albania after sentencing/ serving his sentence if convicted for infringing his human rights…..????

  246. 246
    Archie says:

    His Mrs. seems like a right stroppy slag!

  247. 247
    Archie says:

    The Right Reverend Mervyn Stopwood, I believe!

  248. 248
    Anonymous says:

    Australia 98 v England 157-0 (stumps, day one)


  249. 249
    anon says:

    yhat’s my dream

  250. 250
    fuck the guardian says:

    this guardianista bitch is mental

  251. 251
    centre of excellence says:

    no scotland produced genius in science and the arts and and world leading manufactures and whisky……then GB… and by then it was doomed

  252. 252
    centre of excellence says:

    that would be public sector box ticking non jobs,right

  253. 253
    centre of sexuality says:

    i wouldn’t mind sally giving mr a handjob

  254. 254
    gomez adams says:

    dududah,dududah,tt,dududah,dududah,tt etc ………icant remember the rest of that theme

  255. 255
    hello ofissher says:

    well for all the beer fans out there there exists a munich brew called benedict
    XVI, and it’s very good , find it and enjoy

  256. 256
    as the actress said to the bishop says:


    LMFAO at that name

  257. 257
    tony blair says:

    yeh gordon you Hunt, i feel like topping myself ,everytime i see your arsehole like face

  258. 258
    tony blair says:

    a Hunt

  259. 259
    tony bluuuuurrrgh says:

    he gets caught out and is going to chokey,and says that the taxpayers money should have been spent instead ,on investigating the NOW WTF, thats a typical hard left,, half baked, inverted proposition . what a thug, fuck off sheridan

  260. 260
    swine flu says:

    yes that was prophetic

  261. 261
    POPE XVI says:

    clinically, buy not politically

    guido did highlight this link ….

    read it and LYFAO

  262. 262
    EX PM says:

    where’s” the lord of the pies” ( my quote TM) prescott these days…answers on a postcard please to A. Blair 24 Connaught Sq London W2. i need him to teach me croquet

  263. 263
    EX PM says:


Seen Elsewhere

Users of Gay Hook-Up App Grindr Infected | TechnoGuido
ISIS Raising Funds Online Using Bitcoin | TechnoGuido
UKIP’s Youth Challenge | BBC
ISIS Operative: This Is How We Send Jihadis To Europe | BuzzFeed
Shapps Defends Bashir Defection | Seb Payne
Tory Leadership Contenders Jostle Over Europe | Alex Wickham
Cutting Taxes is Good For You | Art Laffer
Suspects Will Now Have to Prove Innocence | Laura Perrins
Labour Cllr: Cops Shouldn’t Stop Petrol Thieves | HandF Forum
Creeping Cultural Acceptance of Anti-Semitism | Eric Pickles
Time For Greece to Leave Eurozone | Allister Heath

Rising Stars
Find out more about PLMR AD-MS

Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”

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