November 26th, 2010

SHAC Attacks

Guido hears it hasn’t been the happiest of weeks in Downing Street with the mother of all Hilton/Coulson rows taking place early this week after rehab-refugee Hilton* briefed the Sunday papers about big changes to how cigarettes are to be packaged and sold. Steve’s wacky brown paper-packaging ideas went way beyond what Lansley had planned and Coulson apparently wasn’t consulted on the headline front.

With tensions often boiling over are these “SHAC Attacks” going to be the new TB/GBs?

UPDATE : The non-reporting of SHAC Attacks by the gentlemen reporters of the Lobby is the latest example of them behaving exactly as Peter Oborne describes in his book the Triumph of the Political Class. The Lobby is quite simply the tame “client media” of the political class. They’re reluctant to write about the Hilton / Coulson clashes for fear of being frozen out from having stories spoon-fed to them. Just as they were reluctant to write about another Downing Street adviser until the day after he resigned.

*Hilton is a smoker.


  1. 1
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Only one way to sort it …….. Fight


    • 3
      but Coulson is my fwiend!! says:

      I wonder which fuckup is taking up all the press space ?
      Hiltons wonkery or yet another week of Couslons P.R. fuckups ?


      • 11
        Phone Bugger says:

        Coulson is a Genius!


        • 20
          Sarf of the River says:

          They are all turning in to the last lot FFS!

          plain brown packs of fags is just the sort of pointless idea the last lot would have salivated over. Aren’t there more important things to discuss at the moment? The EU are planning a takeover and they are jacking over fag packets.

          Not even a dodgy NOTW editor can be expected to sort these fuckwafts out.

          Screw the lot of them.


          • Red Ed says:

            Angela Eagle would look good with a plain brown bag over her head.


          • Anonymous says:

            Sarf of the River says:
            November 26, 2010 at 12:48 pm
            They are all turning in to the last lot FFS!

            Red,Blue or Yellow Sarf, it makes not a jot of difference; they’re power hungry,troughing politicians.Expect nothing of them & you won’t be disappointed.


          • Maximus says:

            In my experience non-smokers have never needed buttressing from any sort of argument to pour invective over smokers (tho the more polite ones feign a slight effort). Hilton is a non-smoker? or, worse, a reformed smoker? And Coulson partakes?


          • Lord Michael Caine says:

            “The EU are planning a takeover and they are jacking over fag packets”
            Because its EU orders already happening in the EU testing ground Ireland.
            Fags are sold there behind a curtain the shopkeeper will get jail if anyone glimpse a sight of a fag packet.
            Ireland where all the EU politburo laws are tested out.
            No saying no to EU Treaties
            No Smoking
            No plastic bags
            14 separate bins for your rubbish.
            No election unless approved by the politburo.


          • Choking Hazard says:

            Too f******g true Sarf.

            There’e a nice little nuclear war brewing up in Korea, Credit Default Swaps on German bonds are rising significantly above the levels of non-EMU states, and we’re losing (well, not winning anyway) the war in Afganistan.

            And No. 10’s contribution? Change the colour of packets of fags. FFS, I’ve seen better organised riots.


          • Cowboy Neal says:

            Easier to smuggle for those that smuggle them.
            Law of unitended consequence.


      • 77
        William Hague says:

        Put it in mi bum…whhooops


    • 8
      Mr Ground hog Day says:

      Is this Blog Boken. Could have sworn I sae this post yesterday


    • 31
      AC1 says:

      If someone gives you a nudge, punch them in the face.

      Fuck Authoritarian Blue-Labour.


    • 45
      Spank Sinatra says:

      May I suggest strapons and a cage? Could be a nice little earner on pay TV. I will not be watching however…….


    • 69
      The Lamestream Media says:

      Bernie Ecclestone attacked and robbed by “four men” – missing word: B L A C K


      • 73
        Madness, Complete utter madness. says:

        Why do they always run scared of stating the one bit of info that will most likely lead to their arrest? It can’t be the ordinary copper on the ground, it must come from some race and gender awareness jobsworth who has never faced a villain in his/her entire career.


      • 80
        AC1 says:

        PONA = Black


  2. 2
    Howard Flight says:

    Bernard Matthews Funeral is to be an open tray affair..
    He will be arranged with his legs shoved up his arse and his giblets in a polythene bag.


  3. 4
    best book of the year says:

    get Taleb’s new book


  4. 5
    Red Ed says:

    Mithter Thpeaker, can you thack Coulthon pleath? He’th good at hith job and it’th not fair.


  5. 6
    Antipo-dean says:

    Nokia still in business at #10, then?


  6. 7
    Dark Lord says:

    Who cares?


    • 17
      sockpuppet #4 says:

      Perhaps all cig packets should be sold with a felt tip pen.

      That way you can colour it in if you like.


      • 37
        AC1 says:


        I’d prefer it if all cig packets were sold with a health insurance voucher, and the state just stopped meddling.


  7. 9
    Dark Lord says:

    Police investigating Bernard Matthews death have ruled out fowl play.


  8. 10
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Its fucked up policy , How much Tax comes in from smokers ?????, If they discourage smoking then tax take falls , its bollocks that smokers clog up the NHS they pay twice , once in tax and then tax again on Fags .

    And they wonder why people go to the black market ?


    • 15
      Deep Who says:

      Dave was a bit put out when Hilton said he didn’t like fags. Dave said he has fond memories of his first sexual experience with Gerald Frothington-Smythe when he was a fag.


  9. 13
    Deep Who says:

    Someone needs to put that Hilton twat in his box. Fucking poser with his no shoes, feng shui and all that shite.


  10. 14
    Gordon Brown says:

    I never hit anyone.


  11. 16
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    I like this enough to repeat it.

    “Blue Labour, Blue Draper”


  12. 18
    Alastair Campbell says:

    I’m an evil c unt. No one nastier and more sociopathic than me. And I ran the country for ten years! Tee-hee!


    • 30
      They're all smug, sneering, Celt cunts at the BBC, 'cept Kuenssberg whom I wish to bum intensely says:

      Now Unite have Schlomo in place you are a non person to the Politburo, and blood soaked Blair is far too successful to have a mental like you hanging round him.

      Better go back to writing soft porn


  13. 19
    They're all smug, sneering, Celt cunts at the BBC, 'cept Kuenssberg whom I wish to bum intensely says:

    A beautiful, heart warming bit of BBC hypocrisy on the Labour lobotomite Nicky Campbell’s phone in on BBC Radio Five Labour today.

    Discussing the evil, heartless Tories shouting off about the underclass breeding, he had his fellow lefty wankstain, Lady P of Toynbee offering her considered opinions.

    Was he right to say it listeners? smug, sneering Campbell asked
    Outrageous!!!! Polly cried.

    Naturally the Scotch cuuuu’nt didn’t mention to listeners the fantastic Ms Toynbee has likened Tory policy on welfare to the Final Solution!!!! Achtung Juden!!!!

    In a changing world there’s always shameless BBC bias, and hypocrisy.


    • 50
      Mr Plum says:

      I fear the beeb will be pulling these stunts more often now labour are in opposition, they did this when the conservative’s were in last time. Its all well coordinated with every news bulletin repeating the story all day with words out of context, then a big debate about it the next day on chat shows and programs like question time. They make me sick.


      • 74
        The cunt of Monte Cristo says:

        Yes, you’re spot on with regards the coordinated coverage they give to spending cuts/Tory gaffes etc.

        Once they’ve run it on TV they back their lies/distortions up with radio phone- ins.

        I would not have any issue with BBC bias if I wasn’t required by law to pay for these socialist/northern monkey/Marxist vermin


      • 76
        Ed, Shlomo Millibandwagon says:

        The BBC hath my full thupport!!!!! sniff


    • 86
      Sophie says:


      But I bet you pay your TV Tax.

      Until you put your money away & starve the istitutionally left wing BBC of its liefblood (TAX) then nothing will change.

      I am over 3 years into non payment. No fines. No visits. No court action.

      They are powerless without your money & your consent to enter your property.

      Together, we can destroy “our” BBC.


    • 88
      Anonymous says:

      What you need to remember about Nicky Campbell is that he’s adopted ie his own flesh and blood thought he was such a C*U*N*T that they ditched him.


  14. 21
    Moley says:

    The EU is following in Ed Miliband’s footsteps and going on a journey, and this is where it’s going;

    It would seem that Brussels is determined to destabilise as many countries as possible, forcing them to take bailouts in order that Pan European economic governance can be achieved by France and Germany. Portugal, Spain, Belgium and Italy are all in the firing line.

    What happened when France and Germany broke the financial rules and set the precedents for everyone to follow?


    Cigarette packaging is a bit of a distraction; there are more important things for our Government to consider.


  15. 22
    Martin Day says:

    Publish and be damned Guido.

    Guido Fawkes briefly trotted out one of Gordon Brown’s old lines and said: “The deficit was low until the huge global recession hit. We have to remember that we were in huge debt after the Second World War but we still managed to build the NHS and the welfare state.”


    • 40
      AC1 says:

      With the marshall plan money Germany rebuilt industry and reaps the reward today.

      We built a dysgenic immoral cess-pit that harms and kills hundreds of thousands per year.

      I wonder when “Arbeit Macht Frei” will go up over hospital entrances?


      • 85
        Lord Carrington's Binoculars says:

        ‘mazing how rarely you hear the truth. Instead of re-building our industrial base with the post -45 cash (which would have ensured future wealth) Labour spent the lot on setting up the Welfare State.

        The Welfare Horse in front of the profit-making cart, as ever.


  16. 23
    Polly Boy Tee says:

    This site wants a final solution for Hilton and Coulson.

    Oh, hold on, they’re Tories? OK, as you were.


    • 51
      Sarf of the River says:

      The Tories deserve a bit of a whiff of the “final solution” just now.

      They’re behaving like c u n t s, suppressing free speech and apologising to everyone whom they may have “offended” (even rightly so) like a bunch of hoons.

      Looks like Dave wants them media-managed in to a state where even a dried up broad bean would register higher in the homo erectus stakes.


  17. 24
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    Is this serious? People at the top utterly wasting their time on how ciggies should be packed. Is there anything just a little bit more serious to worry them, to get their tempers up? Like the state of this place? Oh! Right. Not a problem for them … Got it now.


  18. 26
    The only time I've liked Michael Howard says:


  19. 28
    Herman Achille Van Rompuy says:

    The Euro has lost 4% this week, that’s our European Parliament payrise nullified. We will have to award ourselves another rise.


  20. 29
    Mine d'Boggles says:

    Nero … Rome …. fiddles …..


  21. 32
    Lobby Reporter says:

    Piss off Fawkes, number 10 gave us a slap up lunch this week, Dave turned up as well and told some cracking jokes. We have no intention of killing off the Goose who lays the Golden eggs.


  22. 33
    blackbyle says:

    No- they are fonctionaires not elected officials ! Ergo they can and should be subject to exactly the the same strictures as meeted out to Lords Flight &Young – stupid as that knee-jerk twich was by our Davy-the-Wavy. He becomes more enfeebled until he shows some galvanised mettle !


  23. 34
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    I think they should be suspended ……………………………….. Froma bridge , Attached to some rope


  24. 38
    Not a Zen Men says:

    Hilton is an image of everything that has become wrong of the Conservative Party. Cameron would do well to the party faithful to get rid of this jumped up arse wipe.

    The public seek right-wing common sense. Not this Guardian wishy-washy crap that Hilton thinks appeals to the middle classes.


  25. 39
    drakes drum says:

    Unelected people having a say on government policy is WRONG.


    • 44
      AC1 says:

      What about elections?


      • 55
        EU, bailouts, muzzies & me? No thanks. says:

        Even the fucking Irish fucked voting up.

        1st time – NO!
        2nd timw – YES!

        WTF changed in between other than loads of brainwashing sponsored by the EU to vote yes?

        Is there legislation here to prevent a government just brow beating joe public endlessly until they get the answer they want?


      • 79
        Mine d'Boggles says:

        No elections before bleakfast, OK?


  26. 41
    Coulson says:

    You ain’t seen me. Right?


  27. 43
    Tim Lovejoy says:

    I bumped into Steve Hilton at a party once …………


  28. 46
    Margaret Beckett says:

    Lick my flange.


  29. 49
    Guido Fawkes Spokesman says:

    ” I did not say i was bigger than God , Just more popular than God .”


  30. 58
    John Bercow says:

    I’m droopy.


  31. 60
    Fag Hag says:

    Smoking is as dangerous as taking cocaine and is highly addictive. Addicts could not give a flying fck what packaging their fix comes in as long as it stops the craving.
    As a preventative measure, brown packaging is preferable to pics of cancerous lungs so it is not going to deter anyone from smoking. If nasty pictures don’t stop young people from smoking nothing will. Peers and peer pressure encourages young people to smoke. This is the area that government should be focusing on. Maybe young people should be rewarded for not smoking i.e special discount vouchers on dvd’s, cd, etc. If working a small reduction on taxes, if not working a small increase in benefit. Maybe I am just writing crap and should stick to a Libertarian view of live and let live. I dunno.


    • 82
      AC1 says:

      No, the fact that smoking is enjoyable, thinning and stress relieving is what encourages people to smoke.

      BTW I’m an ex-smoker. I could see it wasn’t good for my fitness, so I stopped. When I stopped I did put on weight.


  32. 61
    nell says:

    Cameron should donate hilton and coulson to red ed’s lost cause and find himself people who have more professionalism and less ego.

    Poor red ed needs their dodgy guidance he’s busy digging himself some nice deep holes. Last one was yesterday when he said he would be attending the next student riot, sorry, demonstration.


  33. 62
    All revved up says:

    They comes an they goes. Where’s the craption comp, Guido?


  34. 64
    Bongo Cornholio says:

    I’ll miss the pic of Joe Camel.

    Plain brown cartons for cigarettes would look quite cool actually. I think I’ll smoke more when it happens.

    It’s nice that my betters are obviously so concerned about my health though. I still manage to play squash four times a week though and have increased my lung capacity in the last year. Nae danger to the NHS here.


    • 68
      Maximus says:

      Tins of 100 would be cool too. Shiny, embossed tins. No need to paint them brown, that would be eco-unfriendly.


  35. 65
    Bongo Cornholio says:

    Tobacconists have sold loose tobacco in brown paper bags for centuries.


  36. 70
    Bob says:

    Supporting Labour is a gateway drug.


  37. 81
    Been here before says:

    New government – new ferrets.


  38. 84
    White Van Man's latest headlines says:

    Anglo Irish Bank Credit Rating Is Cut Six Levels by S&P to “Junk” status from BBB

    Oh it’s a slippery slope!


  39. 89
    Sunday Morning says:

    It’s not just the lobby press protecting the Tory boys….it works the other way around.

    How else can you explain the PM’s recent refusal to release the information about what McBride was upto in Brown’s government…


    contacts betweewn Damian McBride and Andrew Porter of the Daily Telegraph
    Charles Andrew Harrison made this Freedom of Information request to Prime Minister’s Office

    The request was refused by Prime Minister’s Office.

    Obviously this may well have proved embarrassing for the reporter and his newpaper…… but there seems to be operating a mutually acceptable policy of “you scratch my back and……”


  40. 90
    Brian Kerr says:

    Every day I am so thankful that I left the U.K for a free country where I can buy a packet of cigarettes with a nice design.When I read all the nonsense about what is happening in England I feel so sad for you poor sods who still live there.Get a life and live in a free country like Costa Rica ; part of my pay during National Service 1954/57 was having 200 cigarettes every Friday on muster parade….choice of Senior Service or Players Mild. Now 73 and still smoke 60 or more a day!Great for your health ..only the weak die and good riddance, improves the gene pool.


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