November 4th, 2010

Rohan’s Silicon Silliness on the Roundabouts of Life

Later today the PM will deliver a speech in East London on the growth of high tech enterprises. Dave will laud the colony of groovy start-up internet companies in EC1 that runs from Clerkenwell to Shoreditch bordering on Whitechapel.

Ahead of this speech Rohan Silva, the Downing Street SpAd who used to work for Osborne in opposition, but now cleaves to Steve Hilton, had a meeting with BT bigwigs last month that ended with BT ‘bemused’ by his requests. Rohan asked BT to Wi-Fi up all of Shoreditch for free to make ‘Silicon Roundabout’ a great place to live and work – coincidentally Rohan lives in East London.

BT pointed out that they generally preferred to make their living by charging for their services. Likewise Rohan’s request for BT to move its research function to the Olympic Park as part of the Olympic legacy met with a polite refusal – BT are very happy with their R & D base in Ipswich. The whole meeting became embarrassing says an insider.

Civil servants at the Treasury and at the Department for Business who work for Vince Cable despair. Rohan was not fondly remembered as a junior official at the Treasury, Guido’s co-conspirator in Whitehall claims

“He and Steve Hilton are worse than Ed Balls and Gordon at their worst – announcement driven activity without even a basic grip on economics… Thank god Jeremy Heywood is still there and able to act as a voice of sanity.”

Ben Brogan, usually more than sympathetic to Downing Street sources, has suggested that Rohan is a Malcolm Tucker wannabee –

… coming closest to acting the part of the bullying, foul mouthed, crazed control freak in The Thick of It, played with such zest by Peter Capaldi… It’s early days, but already tales are coming in of moments of rudeness, self-aggrandisement, mindless cruelty, ministerial notices cancelled at short notice.

Rohan has certainly come a long way from when Guido first met a shy, awkward, besuited, slightly out of place character at a Soho (London) loft party for what was the then hot British internet start-up that went on to become the $800 million Bebo social network. Rohan seems to have forgotten a key piece of advice in life: Be nice to people you meet on your way up in life, because…


139 Comments

  1. 1
    Raymond Luxury Yacht says:

    Hi ho Silva whining

  2. 2
    Dr Stantz says:

    *facepalms*

    Are the people sure that there is no way to vote for non-party individuals to make up parliament?

    How many more examples of “They are all equally ruddy useless” do we need?

    10 maybe?

  3. 3
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    Fuckin worse than Balls and Gordon ???????????????

  4. 4
    The Ides of November says:

    Completely off topic but I’ve got say it in public where it will be heard. I dont like the markets at all today, this QE11 in the States is going down like a lead balloon. I think we are in for a rough time the next week (maybe longer?) batten down the hatches folks….Good luck to you all and I really hope I am wrong…

  5. 5
    jUSTIN bEBO says:

    WASSSSUP BRUV?

  6. 6
    MI7 says:

    Bank of England involved in terroist money laundering. Strange the press/news/blogs are very silent about this one

  7. 7
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    It would appear that even the faintest semblance of power corrupts absolutely…but then he is working with Mr Hilton.

  8. 8
    Pete. says:

    Perhaps the silly little retard would get his hi tech cronies together to build their own VPN wherever they want & leave BT to do what was demanded by Gordo the Clown & put in Broadband for puffins on the remotest uninhabited islands of the coast of chuffing Norway.

  9. 9
    whooooos arskin says:

    Rohan Silver looks like he drives a BMW645i

  10. 10
    SilvaLining says:

    Have had a few dealings with this guy – absolutely dreadful. And not very bright at all.

    Policy made on the hoof in opposition, policy made on the hoof in government…there’s nothing new under the sun.

  11. 11
    a social networking site cunt says:

    I am a brain dead mong who loves nothing more than to give away my personal information to all and sundry without a care in the world.

    I think others are very interested in me and can’t wait for my next updates.

  12. 12
    Martin Day-Miliband says:

    Political blogger, Guido Fawkes accused the Government of ‘destroying trust in politics’ by breaking various pledges, including on university funding.

    He claimed it was a ‘Government of broken promises’ on fees, VAT and child benefit. ‘That is what they meant by Broken Britain,’ he said.

    ‘The Prime Minister used to say he wanted to restore trust. All he is doing, day by day, is destroying trust in politics.’

  13. 13
    Anonymous says:

    Silicon Valley is not built around internet cafes, where jobless look at at fundamental Islam websites and plot to blow up people.

  14. 14
    Backwoodsman says:

    You are Ellie & I claim my etc. etc.

  15. 15
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Current Mailygraph finance headline: FTSE 100 hits 28-month high as global markets rally on US Federal Reserve’s QE2

    Doesn’t sound too bad. But it is the Mailygraph, so, hmm.

  16. 16
    Steve Miliband says:

    In response ‘left foot backward’ and ‘labour uHunt’ replied ‘Is this what his leadership(Ed Miliband) has been reduced to? He supports child handouts for the rich. He opposes better universities for the poor.’ Miliband is like a retro Marxist who forgets his own manifesto.

  17. 17
    Tessa Tickles says:

    I thought it was Stephen Fry..

  18. 18
    Sir William Waad says:

    So these folk in Shoreditch are the Free-Riders of Rohan?

  19. 19
    Gordon Brown says:

    You are Sarah Macaulay. Where’s my tea?

  20. 20
    Old buffer says:

    That’s what you get when you employ young British “graduates”. On the whole, such people are fucking stupid – and arrogant with it.

  21. 21
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Never, ever, employ anyone born after 1973 if they were state educated in Britain.

  22. 22
    Engineer says:

    Osborne’s piece in the DT touches on the question of innovation.

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/economics/8108802/Innovation-is-the-secret-of-economic-success.html

    Up to a point, he’s right. However, a successful economy depends on the foundations – the basic businesses supplying nuts and bolts, loaves of bread, hats and coats, transport and communication, products and services of all types. If they can function in an environment of low taxes, light and appropriate regulation and offer good service to their customers, we will all be the better for it.

    Government pinning too many hopes on the internet strikes me as short-sighted. There is far more innovation going on than just in communication technology – how about nanotechnology? What benefits might that bring? Why London? I was under the impression (possibly mistakenly) that the M4 corridor was Britain’s Silicon Valley.

    The government can do two main things to assist business. Firstly, educate the population to be self-reliant and have a keen work ethic and a respect for hard work and enterprise, and secondly, get off the backs of business and let it get on with the job.

  23. 23
    Dick the Prick says:

    It is quite amazing how inept the Tory machine is. Considering they had a good 3 years to assume they were going to win or be governing it would appear that fuck all planning took place and a cast of competent employees was never even considered. It’s looking like 1 term if that.

  24. 24
    Nick2 says:

    BT pointed out that they generally preferred to make their living by charging for their services.

    It really says something when a company like BT has a more commercial outlook than a Tory SpAd. In fact, that a Tory SpAd appears to have NO commercial outlook.

    I thought that the detestable move to ‘rejuvenate’ the area surrounding the Oympic site by pouring billions of practically unbudgeted, totally unfunded, pounds based on nakedly politically partisan bias would have ended on May 5th.

    It appears not – all that has changed is that the government’s run out of money, so it now tries to persuade/browbeat/coerce the private sector into stumping up the cash.

  25. 25
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    I don’t get this free wifi lark. So you can pretend you are working while in MacDonalds or sitting on a park bench. Tell you what, I’ll pay for my broadband, and the government can pay for the after work beer. much better.

    Oh and while I’m at it “groovy start-up internet companies”. Sound like shite that never really make any money. Unless of course you sell the shares at precisely the right moment.

  26. 26
    YorkshireLad says:

    I thought that such brainless and stupid suggestions were the preserve of NuLab Loonies. Obviously I’m either naive, mistaken…or both!

  27. 27
    Red Ed Militant says:

    I always lead from behind

  28. 28
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    The internet. It looked very rosy and wonderful in 1999. Indeed, isn’t it incredible how you hardly need to go in a shop any more, and find odd things second hand.

    I wouldn’t trust nanotechnology. Reminds me too much of biotechnology from the 80’s (which again had a lot of bubble and bust companies). Visions of the future from back then still haven’t arrived.

  29. 29
    Unsworth says:

    Free-Loaders of Rohan, actually.

  30. 30
    Bunny says:

    Is this boy a gayer, has he accompanied Hague on official business? – He looks qware to me

  31. 31
    Maximus says:

    You can take the man out of the gorilla suit, but you can’t take the gorilla suit out of the man.

  32. 32
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:

    Quite right !! I wish these tit heads would get a grip…….. or someone give them a slap !!

  33. 33
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    “Rohan has certainly come a long way from when Guido first met a shy, awkward, besuited, slightly out of place character at a Soho (London) loft party ”

    I hope you didnt share a room .

  34. 34
    concrete pump says:

    A few years ago, myself and others who were working in the Slough Trading Estate, were told by geeky office salesmen that Swindon and the Winnersh Triangle were going to be THE hotbed of technology companies in the near future. We laughed then…

    And we’re still laughing now.

  35. 35
    ST says:

    And I have dealt with the BT executives, doubtless they showed him all their “cool” toys in their 21st century village: 3D television, on demand home cinema etc., the sad little sod probably got carried away and started asking daft questions.

    It’s probably best he did embarrass himself, had he not done so he might have signed the country up for something seriously expensive.

  36. 36
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    BT research is at Martlesham Heath isn’t it?

    Anyway……..

    Former Bank of England economist Danny Gabay, now of Fathom Consulting, warned this week that those who over-extended themselves before the credit crunch and are already struggling with mortgage repayments could face financial disaster when interest rates begin to creep up.

    “Fixing Government finances is important but is only part of the problem,” he said recently. “The other, larger part, is fixing household finances, where in fact the crisis began.”

    Gabay continued: “It is very politically convenient to believe that the crisis was caused by greedy bankers, but nobody made people take out mortgages of five times their income. Lots and lots of people borrowed too much.”

  37. 37
    Frank bloke says:

    Like Warsi et al, Rohan is not on board because of his talent or towering intellect.

    Everyone knows that.

  38. 38
  39. 39
    bergen says:

    Ultimately this US QE will be disasterous.It was a good idea first time but now they’re addicted to it.It will poison them.

  40. 40
    The Ides of November says:

    Im lookin at the headlines as well, the tsunami of cash filtering to the US corporations is going to translate in to stock purchases and increased share prices . The Fed is a Wall Street cash cow! The Fed buys US govt dept/treasuries. But they buy them from Investment institutions like Pacific Invest, who make money on the deal. The QE11 helps finacial institutions (Wall Street) not Main Street or manufacturers where wealth is created. Its not sustainable it feels like a bubble!

  41. 41
    Nick2 says:

    Namely, at the point of the public offering. That’s how the insiders made billions on the dotcom boom.

  42. 42
    Backwoodsman says:

    Ah, but did you laugh when told a kid from Slough Comp would be PM ?

  43. 43
    Hard pressed small business says:

    Well all those type of groovy companies didn’t do what I want, so started up for myself. They have too much money and too much drugs to be of any help to small businesses.

  44. 44
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    But, but, but the olympic legacy will be wonderful for all in the area. And, and, and the olympics will only cost 2.7 billion pounds, Tessa Jowell told me so!!!!

  45. 45
    Dick Sole says:

    Not even a basic grasp of economics eh? Might be a men to watch for the future. There is hope yet

  46. 46
    Anonymous says:

    It is at Martlesham, and for a good reason, levels of electrical noise. You can do a certain amount with screened rooms (Faraday cages) but a city location would be impossible when you have to use outside aerials. They would also
    have a problem with causing interference in a location like London.

  47. 47
    Engineer says:

    I should perhaps have said the M40 corridor, and areas around Cambridge as well.

    Actually, there’s innovation going on everywhere. There are decent businesses built on the manufacture and supply of better construction plant. So JCB’s and concrete pumps are not innovation? They can still earn decent export revenues, provide good jobs and contribute to the exchequer. If the companies designing and building them continue to innovate, they’ll continue to earn decent export revenues etc.

    You mention Swindon. Why did we throw away our railway equipment design and manufacturing capabilities? We could be selling to China now, if we’d had a bit more nous twenty-five years ago.

  48. 48
    ST says:

    5 years ago I did nanotechnology you know why? Because that’s how you got your research grant.

    Today, I do energy – guess why?

    Although, of course I really do neither, I just shoehorn the phrase in.

    Most of it’s wank, research science takes about 15 years to get to scalable commercialisation. A great deal of the technology today was discovered in the late 1980s and has been in development since. Trouble is there is no money for stuff that isn’t cool. Did you know every single one of the regional development agencies thinks their area will be a national leader in nanotech? Twats.

    Another example, synthetic biology. In the USA their trying to produce high value commodities (certain sugars etc) which makes sense as it commercialises the technology. A science advisor in the previous Parliament told me that he didn’t think we (who are world leaders) should fund this, rather we should focus on synthbio energy because “that’s the future, that’s the next thing”. Great. So the Americans storm ahead on the commercialisation and scaling, while we develop the technology for stuff which is beyond the market’s margin. The result being that when synthbio energy FINALLY becomes economic the Americans pick our research up and run with it.

    It’s this sort of twattish thought which is why we keep dropping the ball.

  49. 49
    X-Factor says:

    Cowell bored with owning the music industry?

  50. 50
    MI7 says:

    Yeah. I’ve noticed The Telegraph give no mention of The Bank of Englands involvement in money laundering for terroists – a very serious crime these days – and instead focus just on the mysterious Foundation X.

  51. 51
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Named Adastral Park, to be precise – being located on a former RAF base. “Per ardua ad astra”, roughly translated as “through insignificant fucking Tory twerps, to the stars…”

  52. 52
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Should be filed under “Twat Watch”.

  53. 53
    Martin Day says:

    The next Budget will be on March 23 next year, Chancellor George Osborne said today, following discussions with Guido Fawkes
    Guido Fawkes told the Commons Political Blogging Committee that he was giving four months advance notice of the date.

    He added: “You can put that in your diary.”

  54. 54
    ST says:

    Depends what you mean by nanotech. In some respects it’s already making an impact and is in products being sold such as wound dressing, fuel, sun tan lotions, surface cleaners.

    It’s starting to impact on medicine – there are some new cancer vaccines being developed based on it.

    But it won’t be nano-robots or any of that crap.

    Biotech is a little different, it requires massive investment. You can make nano-gold with a kettle.

  55. 55
    Deep Who says:

    Add 10 years and you’re nearly right. Like many people I believe what I do in life is in spite of, not because of, my education. Stupidity is inherent; it’s the laziness arrogance that schools build in this last couple of decades.

  56. 56
    Engineer says:

    It’s cynical, but it’s probably still tue. The best way to make money in a gold-rush is to sell shovels.

    I don’t suppose the microscope manufacturers did too badly out of nanotechnology. The trick is being in the right business at the right time, and that’s more down to luck than judgement.

  57. 57
    Middle Englander says:

    Little shop near Covent Garden; it’s where I get my hill walking kit.

  58. 58
    Billy Bowden is the greatest umpire ever ! says:

    So we are fucked then ………. Ho Hum

  59. 59
    Hi Rohan says:

    Make mine a chicken dupiaza. Chop chop.

  60. 60
    Lil Olmey says:

    Obviously a future Chancellor.

  61. 61
  62. 62
  63. 63
    Rohan da Silva Minga says:

    Is it coz I is black innit

  64. 64
    concrete pump says:

    “The best way to make money in a gold-rush is to sell shovels”.

    And metal detectors. Good money made from the recent Sudan mineral / gold rush.

  65. 65
    lmao says:

    Dancing with her must be like slinging a sack of coal around.

  66. 66
    Arrogance? says:

    I’m sure this will provoke howls of outrage from the Labour libs but I find that most anglo-asian men are incredibly arrogant, rude, unthinking, and try to over-compensate for their background with a caricature of the British “lad”. This is not the case at all with anglo-asian women. I’m not talking about the muzee ones, they can fuck off. But secular anglo-asian women are on the whole the complete opposite of the moronic males. Rohan is just indicative of his kind. It also brings into question Cameron’s judgement on hiring such a useless twat.

  67. 67
    ST says:

    Look it’s not that I don’t think these things will never make money, they will. My cynicism about nanotech is that it’s a trendy label for a subject that’s been studied since the 1830s.

    The problem is hype over hard nosed realism. The result is bad investment decisions and wrong tracks being followed.

    At the risk of sounding a suck up we need more Engineers.

    There’s a spin out company I know which has over 7 years of government support developed 12 products but failed to commercialise any of them. The reason? Because their a bunch of academic scientists more interested in discovery than development.

    Why develop 11 new products when you haven’t got your bog standard one to market?

    Put a team of chemical engineers in and the problems of scale up and batch consistency would have been solved, and they’d have one good, consistent saleable product rather than 12 cool proof of concepts.

  68. 68
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Yipee, we are Wall Street, and we thank you all sucker American people for giving us more free money, while you pay for us to live it up in some tax haven with your money. Thank you Mr Obama for having the brains of a plank of wood, and believing in bs Keynesian economics.

    The markets rise on getting all this taxpayers money, and the suckers are left with the bill.

    Should have collapsed the banks instead of letting them get away with it, would have been cheaper and actually taught them a lesson.

  69. 69
    Sir William Waad says:

    How can a House of Lords debate be captioned ‘Democracy Live’? This corroboree of failed or superannuated politicians is about as democratic as the Kray Brothers.

  70. 70
    Rohan's buddies says:

  71. 71
    X-Factor says:

    I’ll bet this prat jangles as he minces along.

  72. 72
    Sir William Waad says:

    Rohan Silva was educated, or at least taught, at an independent school in Yorkshire.

  73. 73
    Lord Wayne of Trombone says:

    bbc is shit

    The strike will last for 48 hours and has been called in protest at the BBC’s proposed cuts to its pension scheme.
    Union representatives said yesterday that big BBC names including Martha Kearney, Kirsty Wark, Nicky Campbell and Shelagh Fogarty will join the walkout.

    Nicky Campbell? big names?

    Do me a fucking favour

    This is the biggest pile of has been shit fucks I have ever seen

    fuck the strike fuck the shitty news service fuck 5L

    I was on the tube on the day of the strike and was not hindered- fuck the the drivers
    when fire and taxi service goes on strike – we do not even notice – fuck the LFB

    Dear BBC journos: I am watching sky on channel 82 freeview digital HD. Fuck off with your strike. you are a bunch of over paid poor quality c9nts. Did you never go to USA and watch news journalism that was the same old shit ever time? Fuck you and your strike.

    Because I am not in some fucking public sector job and not a lazy c8nt – if I go on strike my customers will shut me down. try a few spoonfuls of reality you c7nts

    WT

  74. 74
    Grumpy, Happy, Sleepy, Sneezy, Dopey, Bashful and Doc says:

    We were the pioneers of nanotechnology until that bastard Disney stole all our patents.

  75. 75
    lol says:

    It’s called multi-cultural enrichment and I understand that we’re supposed to celebrate it.

  76. 76
    Steve Miliband says:

    I prefer North Face

  77. 77
    misterned says:

    And this is the tone that the lamestream media will pursue…

    “doddery old fool falls for internet scam!”

    and then move on to the next XfactorStrictly story.

  78. 78
    Tessa Tickles says:

    My rule still hold true, though. Doesn’t mean that those outside the rule – Gordon Brown, for example – will necessarily be any good at their jobs.

  79. 79

    Slightly O/T, I noticed the pillock Peter Watt, former Labour treasurer, of the ‘End of the Party’ – ..Nokia throwing revalations fame has said on Labour Uncut….

    ‘Labour needs to recognise that until we re-establish a reputation for economic competence, we are unlikely to get a fair hearing’

    Fair hearing my arse, they get a fair hearing, the problem is their evidence is completely flawed!

    If you can be arsed, you can read the rest of his laughable bullsh*t here >> http://labour-uncut.co.uk/2010/11/04/labour-is-wrong-on-housing-benefit/

  80. 80
    misterned says:

    BTW, someone has pasted the ennobled Lord’s admission to money Laundering in the comments of that Telegraph blog.

  81. 81
  82. 82
    Polly Tuscany says:

    This site seems to want a final solution for Rohan.

  83. 83
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Hmm. Good point.

  84. 84
    Sir William Waad says:

    Rohan da Silva is a respected pianist, whereas Rohan Silva is a disrespected…..

  85. 85
    Jay says:

    Get those crazy muzzies!!

    It’s a pity our country is filling up with the fuckers.

  86. 86
    John Simpson says:

    Exposing Mr Silva’s behaviour is like waterboarding.

  87. 87
    ST says:

    Put him down as a probably qware.

  88. 88
    Hod says:

    I think we’re all agreed that he’s a slimy turd.

  89. 89
    Nick2 says:

    “The horror – the horror…”

  90. 90

    Has he just discovered his scratch card was one number off?

  91. 91
    Walt Disney's fanatical Nazi ghost says:

    There is no room in der Master-race for little creatures like you, schweinhund!

  92. 92
    BURN THEM ALL says:

    Guy Fawkes tomorrow. Londoners keep your eyes peeled for FBU members setting fire to houses.

  93. 93

    He should change his name.

    Peter Who?

  94. 94
    Lauren Booth joins nutty brigade says:

    First Yvonne Ridley, now Lauren Booth. I would have a law that makes it illegal for anyone to convert to the terrorist religion. Now that Miss Booth has joined the crazies and will probably start wearing a headscarf soon if she hasn’t already, may I suggest she fucks off to Saudi Arabia or Iran where she can get first hand experience of how her new-found religion treats women?

  95. 95
    Anonymous says:

    Agreed and they usually come with a huge sense of entitlement. Wankers the lot of them.

  96. 96
    Tessa Tickles says:

    Yes, something like that.

    John, could you help me out? “Stars back BBC strike”. “Union representatives said yesterday that big BBC names including Martha Kearney, Kirsty Wark, Nicky Campbell and Shelagh Fogarty will join the walkout. “

    I’ve heard of Nicky Campbell (Capital Radio years ago, wasn’t it?) but who the fuck are the others?

  97. 97
    South of the M4 says:

    I suspect the engineers would have spent their time trying to make it a continuous process rather than batch and then over-engineered the kit resulting in reliability problems and high maintenance costs. I met many chemical engineers who thought their job was to look clever, hence the complications. And I have also met many that kept it simple. They were the most successful. I digress, my point is that Chemical Engineering and Chemistry departments are rare in Universities these days.

  98. 98
    sockpuppet #4 says:

    All the steps are hard. much better to go and sell ringtones to the braindead or stuff like that.

    Linking to what I said before ( and almost thinking you’re describing biotech). Get 11 groovy(*) sounding products that might possibly work, and the shareholders will be quids in. Unlike dot-com you can actually answer the rather too obvious question “how will this stuff make money?” in one short answer (even if any analysis longer than half a side of A4 wouldnt).

    (* vomit).

  99. 99
    Tessa Tickles says:

    I thought it was Bradford Town Council discussing an ill-advised planning application for a new Wetherspoons.

  100. 100
    Old Levi Strauss says:

    Dear Engineer, whats the nano tech equivilant of a pair of Jeans ?

  101. 101
    Anonymous says:

    Why is it that SpAds, aides etc assisting US politicians have a reputation for probity, intelligence and efficiency whereas the ones here appear to be either bizarrely partisan (eg Shr+ti Vad+ra), ghastly bullies (eg D+m+an McBr+de) or utterly contemptuous of the public (eg J+ M+ore)?

    But IMO the one thing that all of the last crop had in common was that they appeared to have no concept of ethical behaviour or sense of public duty, merely personal allegiance to their minister.

    Let’s see if the CoDems’s crop of SpAds/aides are any better behaved.

  102. 102
    Guido says:

    Support the Republican movement for a more democratic and fairer society visit http://www.republic.org.uk

  103. 103
    A good Rule of Thumb says:

    The Technology is usually about 50 years behind the science and at least 100 years behind the maths.

  104. 104
    Capt. Shadow (Retd.) - Former MI5 Wet-Ops. Team says:

    Traget identified, Sah!…

  105. 105
    fafinchley says:

    He’s a stupid chump! Wi-Fi? BT’s The Cloud? Who needs them nowadays with practically everyone given a gigabyte of Internet access.

    I don’t even bother to use my wi-fi at home anymore.

    Ampers

  106. 106
    The Beast of clerkenwell(gaza office) says:

    Dave prefers about face

  107. 107
    Infidel says:

    She shags around alot, best if we have her stoned to death immediately.

  108. 108
    Mong says:

    After Al Qaieda has threatened a bomb attack in Paris, the French terror alert has been raised from ‘Surrender’ to ‘Collaborate’.

  109. 109
    Nasty Browsing Habit says:

    Kirsty Wank has been polluting my screen for about 25 years on Snoozenight and I still haven’t understood a single word she’s said.

  110. 110

    I’ve a great idea for a phone – based reality show.
    Public votes to decide who walks out and joins the strike.

    Text 1 – for Graham Norton
    Text 2 – for Nick Robinson
    Text 3 – for that annoying bloke who’s name you don’t know but adverts for his ‘King is dead’ show keep appearing everywhere.
    Text 4 – Ian Hislop
    Text 5 – The girl that isn’t Bleakley and the bloke who isn’t as fat or as grumpy as Chiles.
    Text – 6 Rob McElwee
    Text -7 A Dimbleby
    text 8 The old bloke on the dancing show. Not Forsyth..the other one.
    Text 9 – Jo Brand, assuming Russell isn’t allowed on anymore
    Text 10 – Michael Grade

  111. 111

    I noticed they were very keen to sign up to operating aircraft carriers without any planes on them.

  112. 112
    The Beast of clerkenwell(gaza office) says:

    My router was down last week, I didnt get any calls from young Miss DaSilva offering to let me nip along to his place and make use of his portal
    I suppose that I have too much hair, am too much of a “right wing headbanger”
    As consolation for the poor spad, when Hilton has finished with him Hague is looking for a new swarthy headboard banger

  113. 113
    Nasty Browsing Habit says:

    There’s got to easier ways of going on the wagon, surely?

    Still, if she insists on getting to her knees five times a day, she might as well give the floor a good scrub while she’s down there.

  114. 114
    zoot allures says:

    Makes sense. The frogs are well-practiced in the art of removing body parts with a sharp blade, too.

  115. 115
  116. 116
    Anonymous says:

    Its so much worse. He wants all security turned off all computers and government networks. If you think Government lost data before, hold onto your hats!

  117. 117
    HappyUK says:

    Quite why the fuck any self-respecting start-up would want to be based in East london is beyond me. I’m thinking of some day starting on my own, and East London is probably last on my list of locations….

  118. 118
    mugwump says:

    Don’t forget the Carry Trade. Serious amounts of this money will end up as “investments” in the Asia / Pacific areas. To the intense concern of the Countries on the receiving end. ie their currencies rise and the dollar goes down. Neat eh.

  119. 119
    misterned says:

    I also wonder if the Jeckyll Island meeting is somehow relevant too?

  120. 120
    Anonymous says:

    What does he mean “re-establish ” ???

  121. 121
    BillyBob - Ooman Rights Legislation, just a load of bollocks!! says:

    Very close to the murder capital of the UK…… Ipswich !!

  122. 122
    misterned says:

    Could this be a Yes Men scam?

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Yes_Men#Dow_Chemical

    They are pretty fucking good at tricking people into unbelievable gullibility.

  123. 123
    Ewanme says:

    A fascinatin piece of intercourse .

    Ta .

    E x .

  124. 124
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Change gear, change gear, murder a prostitute, change gear…

  125. 125
    Mornington Crescent says:

    Or Tower Hamlets council discussing pretty much anything.

  126. 126
    On me 'ed son says:

    jellied eels, pearly queens, barrowboys, bow bells, the bull and bush, slags and deadbeats, gobby taxi drivers, thousands and thousands of muzzies….just a few of the attractions that make the east end the place to be

  127. 127
    Jeremy 'Jezza' Clarkson says:

    Change gear, change gear, check mirror, murder a prostitute, change gear, change gear, murder. That’s a lot of effort in a day,”

  128. 128
    MI7 says:

    misterned I doubt it’s the yes men they would have admitted it by now if it was them.

  129. 129
    Disaffected says:

    And to think our taxes pay for this idiot. Wavy Dave has also sent his former party employees to work for the civil service, he thought to use anecdoatal evidence about the Liebour Party would somehow justify his disgraceful behaviour. Politicians do not get that their corrupt behviour is unnacceptable and the public are fed up with it. We cannot trust or reply on a word they say. I would love a UK Tea Party.

    Dave, unless you fcking wake up and act on your pledges to clean up politics you will be out on your ear at the next election- dumb old Gordon will be a distant memory.

    Lib/Dem Party died this week from their lies on university tuition fees. Why should EU students not pay for university tuition fees in Scotland when British students do? Our taxes wasted on EU students to help our EU competitors, unfcking believable……Their position on the EU and immigration remains at odds with the public. Bye, bye Clegg.

  130. 130
    He He says:

    lol a funny one from Martin for once

  131. 131
    Anonymous says:

    I have dealt with him in number 10. He is an arrogant twat that knows fuck all. He goes around shouting at everyone coming out with daft un thought through statements.

    The scary thing is the other idiots in number 10 and cabo listen to him… hilton knows silva, silva knows twat steinberg and before you know it steinberg is on a committee. Another dopey geek with nothing better to do than toss his way around whitehall

  132. 132
    nmj says:

    I think I’ll just stay here in Manila, thanks all the same.

  133. 133
    Anon E Mouse says:

    Shelagh is Campbell’s co-host on 5-Lite Brekkie

  134. 134
    Anon E Mouse says:

    How about everyone over a MP’s salary and then only let them back to work once they sign new contracts – and they can pay for their own damn pensions.

  135. 135
    Rowley Birkin QC says:

    Obviously a total ‘king Hoon

  136. 136
    unablogger says:

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/middleeast/iran/8110535/Iran-accuses-Britain-of-sponsoring-terrorism.html

    Of course we do we have been doing it for ages, Abu Hamza has been living off this country for fucking years and still him and his festering muslim brood are still at it. Get the gallows ready folks…

  137. 137
    unablogger says:

    What is it with these c u n t s, they come straight out of uni and think they know it all, sack the fucking lot and make them get proper jobs.

  138. 138
    unablogger says:

    It’s true, light travel’s faster than sound, that’s why some people look intelligent until they open their mouths. Rohan being a prime fucking example..the twat

  139. 139
    Anonymous says:

    Be nice to people you meet on your way up in life, because…

    Says the man who desperately tries to bully every junior staffer in Whitehall. Guido this is your most fabulous piece of hypocrisy yet!


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Boris on British Jihadis. Apparently based on MI5 intel:

“If you look at all the psychological profiling about bombers, they typically will look at porn. They are literally w***ers. Severe onanists. They are tortured. They will be very badly adjusted in their relations with women, and that is a symptom of their feeling of being failures and that the world is against them. They are not making it with girls, and so they turn to other forms of spiritual comfort — which of course is no comfort.”


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