Humiliated LibDem MP Mike Hancock was arrested last week for indecent assault after he pursued a mentally ill constituent with a barrage of dinners, presents and late night text messages.  He’s been bailed until January.

The police got involved after the young, yet unnamed, lady’s care staff raised the alarm. Hancock has not denied he was contacting the girl, but claims that he was only trying to cheer her up. Guido has had a glance over the text messages he was sending her, and he’ll let you decide if this was merely an attempt to make someone feel better or something more:

• “You are and believe me i know what i am talking about u r very and i miss you sexy XXX” (15.01 June 14, 2010) With this record, Guido is sure he does…

• “Please give me a chance you never know my princess XXX” (23.33 April 18, 2010) Just trying to cheer her up!

• “Thankyou as long its not a wet one XXX” (23.27 May 27, 2010)

Guido hates to think what that last one is referring to, but given the time of night he has a couple of ideas…