Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View
Another Twittish Tweet from Kerry McCarthy | BBC
What’s the Point of Our Anti-Business Secretary? | Ruth Porter
HuffPo Hiring Pro-Iranian Mehdi “Act of Desperation” | Fox News
Krugman is Seductive, Simplistic and Unrealistic | Jeremy Warner
Lower Taxes, Higher Growth, the Statistical Evidence | CPS
Bash the Unions, Gatecrash the Quangos | ConservativeHome
I Told You So: Euro is Doomed | Douglas Carswell
PM Speaks for the Nation When Bashing Balls | Quentin Letts
Time for an Alliance | Dan Hannan
Farage’s Plan | ConservativeHome
Guardian Open News is a Failure | Heather Brooke
Balls Calls for Deeper Cuts | Speccie
Lessons from the Thirties | CPS
PMQs Idiots | Harry Cole
Jon Cruddas is Not the Messiah | Dan Hodges
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Lord Lamont told ITV News…
“I think the PM is just human and Ed Balls is a pretty irritating person”
Today I’m mostly be playing hide and seek.
Thank you.
(flapflapflap) (swoop) (squit) GOTCHA!!!
Nick Clegg’s new “assistant”? Don’t make me fucking laugh. That coalition was the biggest public request for young cock and arse ever.
Mr Cameron must be going through another mid-life crisis.
Fuck ‘im!
Why don’t you do us all a favour and just keep hiding in the cabinet closet?
Why don’t you do us all a favour and just keep hiding?
‘One in three…….’
or
‘Two in three…..’
Maybe you like 3-in-1… when it’s nice and oily!
Guido is just jealous he didn’t get the job; but we all know he’s applied to be Iain Dale’s new assistant…
Iain Dale’s new “assistant”? Don’t make me fucking laugh. That job ad was the biggest public request for young cock and arse ever.
Mrs Dale must be going through another mid-life crisis.
Fuck ‘im!
Mrs Dales diary is about as inspiring as the original was and frankly now hes gone gooey for sky appearances et al hes gone mainstream so a write off for real invective
plus his boundless enthusiasm for musical theatre
And pretty bottoms.
I am pleased to inform Members of the House that my forthcoming booky will make everything clear as follows:
a. how I saved the world
b. how the world craved more of me than I had time to give
c. how I saved the US of A (after ‘it’ had started there)
d. what I did in the White House kitchen and with which vegetables
e. how the EUSSR will reward me
f. what I will do during my first 100 days as President of the World B ank
g. gow I won the 2010 GE with an unprecedented majority
Found in the fiction section
Next to the bible, the torah and the koran.
oh yes cp
And election manifestos
Or in any good supermarket between the Andrex and the kitchen rolls.
Next to the kitty litter, surely.
CP, there is an old country saying ‘Never believe anything you hear, and only half of what you read’. Are you well read?
bibleold testamenttorahtalmud, sanhedrinkoranhadiths – apocryphal and contemporaneousflying spaghettiI think you’re a bit too clever for me Maximus. I may answer the question poorly and look a complete tit.
Next to the Conservative and Lib Dem Manifestos
It’s been a long Bank Holiday, Maximus and it’s got hard to unpick your last note. Only half of what you read, eh? CP had a good point but I’m too tired to care.
The OT from the Bible (and not the NT), then essentially the same text again (in a more authentic version) with the Talmud (but not the Commentaries).
Then you leave the invisible purple monster as incarnate only as ‘flying spaghetti’. Please clarify before Guido wakes from his siesta and deletes us both.
Apologies for the obscurity of my side-show.
Billy B said > Found in the fiction section
Mr Pump said > Next to the bible, the torah and the koran.
Maximus suggested to remove those 3 from the fiction and insert certain other documents stated.
Maximus does not think religion is 100% bogus, merely 99.9% bogus. If there are ‘deep truths’, he reasons, they are most likely present (to be found) in the original testaments/testimonies — not in the centuries of exegetic b/s deriving from the rebbes, the priesthoods, or sundry imams or sheiks, etc. He considers that it is the uncritical devotion to (=worship of) that exegesis that causes the problems — those narrative conceits being the sufficient and necessary conditions for the oppression of the majority by a minority elite, and the prevention of the majority attaining their own religious autonomy (conscience).
The ‘flying spaghetti’ alludes to the analogous, apparently antithetical narrative propounded by a certain St Richard of Dorkins (ie little dorks) – which, as you see, Maximus considers as just another narrative being promulgated by an elite (ie ‘scientists’) which is required to be swallowed by the rest of us. Maximus declines, having had the benefit of an education that included philosophy.
Please don’t vote for Ed Miliband, you know it makes sense.
Hahahaha, mandelbum’s fucking wearing a syrup of figs what vain slaphead!
Double talking slimey two faced weasel back on the latest spin cycle ..
new labour ..dreamt up amid the spires of university …Tony Gordon
and Peter creating the new vision swallowed hook line and sinker by
the great unwashed giving us 13 years of shitfeist
The c’unt needs a paris tunnel moment.
thought he had died of aids ?
we have the antidote
We fucking started it!
Careful Nat for someone who made a fortune playing with the tories of old the company you keep with tossers like mandelson make your motives for doing anything these days way left of avarice.
Polish your noggin govnor,only a penny.
The BBC keep putting this disgraced politician on, but I don’t know how can anybody bear looking at his oily, smarmy, smug faced boat; let alone listening to his fu’king devious lies, what is it with the arse wipes at the BBC.
He’s a shit stabbing slimy c’unt.
Alistair Darling, along with my predecessor and the world’s best chancellor ever Gordon Brown, did not collapse the UK economy in a mountain of funny money and debt, it was all America’s fault and the bankers.
The UK economy was so strong we decided to sell half the UK’s gold reserves at massive losses to the UK taxpayer, for worthless bits of paper. Now look how well we are doing with those worthless bits of paper.
Guidos Alive !!!!!
PLEASE DO NOT STEAL MY WONDERFUL CATCHPHRASE!!!!!
I thought it was, “I wouldn’t touch it with yours.”
I THINK YOU HAVE ME CONFUSED WITH SOMEBODY ELSE!!!!!!!
As long as nobody tries to steal mine I don’t care.
Like I don’t care about the interests of my constituents!
Ker-ching!!!!
Doth Hague protest too much?
Is Ffion too posh to shag?
We need to know!
The posh ones shag the very best, – eh Jess!
Oooo….I’m arriving….I’m arriving…..
Oh really it’s, “one is arriving” “one is arriving”
ho hi never read the daily mirrow.
So are admiting you gotit wrong with Hauge then ?
And the cartoons not funny ( Nothing new there )
Well it made me laugh on this boring Monday morning.
At least it’s got the usual name-plates so we can tell who everyone’s supposed to be, otherwise we’d be fucked.
Fucked on a bank holiday….Ahhh, the memories…….
Judging Rich and Mark’s efforts is a bit like finding something to praise in one’s 6-y-o’s latest effort in art class. By their own standards, the cartoon is quite good.
Is the “CACAMERON” an In-Crowd appellation; a witty abbreviation of “Cack Cameron”; or a spelling mistake?
Just asking.
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=caca
My, my, concrete pump. You mean the Fawkes We Wuv Dopey Dave Fan Club has been infiltrated by an undercover marxist goon squad disguised as wannabe cartoonists?
Will you fuck off using my name Hunt
Did the one eyed mong and Lord Fondelbum once share a jar of Vaseline together?
So the rumourmongers have it.
I wonder which one of them claimed for it on expenses?
Both of them. Several times.
Just love your comment – probably very true too.
Look at the muck on ‘ere!
Now, be nice!
Shut that door…
Owwww look at you!
“I’m free!”
I’m out!
I’m still hiding, shhhhhh…
oh you are awful what can you mean
I’m very firmly in…….oooer.
(squirt) UH-HUUUURRRRKKK!!! (flap)
exactly..hic
hand ?
Lord Mandelbum king maker has been up to his old tricks again and has been suggesting Ed MiliTwat would be a “Regressive” influence on Liebour.
Select the candidate endorsed by a 5th rate celeb (a La Bliar) and does weird things with fruit
Then if edb can’t win that’s the one we want!
Well it is nearly coronation time at conference and you know my influence is all encompassing so now the hols are over its time to crank up the cloak and swagger routine.
Get ready for my conference newsletter to the faithful….you can be sure I’ll be on the winning side as anything I say is never clear cut but subject to my retrospective interpretation once I see which way my wind is blowing.
To all my regular ring rinsers…keep up the good work…we’re on manoeuvres again soon. pip pip
I don’t get it.
We know
Nothing wrong with that CP
No, you mean you don’t get any.
Not as much as i’d like, no.
There’s help at the Ann Summers banner ad, cp.
Lovely.
i reckon the rumour about Hauge was started by mossad for what dave said about Gaza
Go back to the fucking cricket, at least we know everybody plays with a straight bat.
Oh yes indeed! Very very straight.
Most interesting thought.
Hmmm – poufs or Israel?
Leaves me in a quandary as to which I despise most, but I guess the solution is to send all the poufs to Israel and let them sort it out.
We’ve started with Miranda as ‘peace envoy’, so why not add to the team?
Gazza, he was a good footballer once
i’m hung over….
I blame the NWO
i don’t. i blame myself for staying out until 5 this morning drinking.
too much dreaming
Did Blunt rob any taxpayers money ? Was that the reason he come out ?
Need you ask?
I thought he’d come out because one of the paper’s was going to out him & he was racing to get the news out before they could do that? Hence the very sudden ‘Bye love, I’m off to be gay’ at home.
I suppose that Blunt made his ‘shock announcement just a day or so before this Hague controversy broke in order to try and deflect attention from Hague.
British politicians are so predictable . Idiots!
At least it’s not scandal of the same grubby calibre, at least yet, of the sort of ducking and diving that the last labour government got up to.
Have each candidate enter room backwards with trousers round ankles. Exclude those with rough red ring.
Margaret Becket’s lipstick ?
I had strawberry jam on my toast for breakfast. You’ve just very nearly reunited me with it….
sorry Engineer but glad your strong constitution prevailed !
I’ve heard you love a bit of the blobby stuff.
claps !
Agree Caz. there was a rumour of a super injunction last week, ‘some paper going to out senior Tory’, next day Blunt revelations and except for blogosphere Hague story disappears.
Call me old fashioned but If you surround yourself with knob jockeys and have them as “personal drivers” unless you own a mobile dog grooming service its a bit sus isnt it?
Hague is discreetly flamboyant and tells a good bitchy joke
Yet more evidence, added to the fact that he is threatening to sue if any person calls him a poov in the MSM
Billy , come out of the WC , we will all still like you
A sensible yorkshire bloke who just happens to like a bit of kok
A slim Eric Pickles
I’ve always been suspicious of Letwin, not Hague.
Mr Pump , Letwin supposedly let a “young man” Into his house for a slash and was then appalled to find that he had been robbed
YEAH we all let scrotes in for a piss
Personaly I would have pointed said scrote to a bush or introduced the young chap to some of the interesting things that I keep around the house or about my person
Letwin is definately a knob jockey
Whilst at conference in Bournemouth some years ago there was a fire alarm very late one terriffic evening at the conference hotel..the marriot..and the entire, then, shadow cabinet came down and stood outside the front doors…if you had seen Ollie Letwin with his little jammies on you would have pissed yourselves…buttoned up to the top and a diddy dressing gown (or might have been coat) we all did …his face was a treat to behold and when he realised we were taking the piss he coloured up and slid behind his colleagues…fucking priceless
Don’t forget to add Jeremy Hunt to that sordid daisy chain. It becomes clearer every day that we’re being led by a cosy cabal of cocksuckers.
concrete pump is a mobile dog grooming service.
Whats worse being gay or leaving 4.8 trillion of debt ?
4.8 trill doesn’t frighten the horses
It never bothered me either – the £ 4.8 trillion, I mean.
Sightly of topic here but I had to insure all my big white vans this morning its a fleet policy and the fucking Hunts have put the cost up by 35% on last year! The robbing bastards at the banks/insurance their all the same are really pissing me off of late.
You can try all your comparison sites you want they’ve all put their prices up, its a price fixing rip off, and we were thinking of taking on an extra guy this winter. Now that’s on the back burner till next year, the banks and insurance robots really aren’t helping, anyone else noticed this?
Ok rant over, the voices in my head are now silenced.
One in ten vehicles on road wi no insurance – so you av to pay!
Yeah, the insurance robot told me crash for cash/medical claims and none insured twat’s. But 35% in one year, come on now!
35% seems to be the going rate for everything. Yesterday morning my local car park raised its charges from three quid to four quid for the first hour. That’s roughly about 35% according to my maths – and no discernible improvements to the place either (eg: fill in the pot holes, paint the cashiers cabin etc).
Greedy bastards.
A new car for the Mayor
The only solution to this is to put Third Party Cover onto the price of fuel – that way, every fuel use is insured commensurate with their usage.
If anyone then wants ‘comprehensive top-up’ cover that’s an optional extra which the thieving insurance industry could provide.
But once it became genuinely optional, I reckon not too many would take it – we only pay as much as we do because it’s legally compulsory. That’s an invitation to a cartel.
the reason we all pay ridiculous amounts for car insurance is the racket between the garages and repairers who as soon as the word insurance claim is mentioned think ‘ker..ching I thank you’. Whilst this reality drives the costs of claims ever higher forget any insurer lowering prices and even if they do to ‘buy’ a book of clients they hike them the next year…. the whole industry is a complete con on the driving public.
legally compulsory.
In 1930, the UK government introduced a law that required every person who used a vehicle on the road to have at least third party personal injury insurance. Today UK law is defined by the Road Traffic Act 1988, which was last modified in 1991. The Act requires that motorists either be insured, have a security, or have made a specified deposit (£500,000 as of 1991) with the Accountant General of the Supreme Court, against their liability for injuries to others (including passengers) and for damage to other persons’ property resulting from use of a vehicle on a public road or in other public places.
The minimum level of insurance cover commonly available and which satisfies the requirement of the Act is called third party only insurance. The level of cover provided by Third party only insurance is basic but does exceed the requirements of the act.
Third party only insurance, third party fire and theft insurance or fully comprehensive makes no fucking difference to the price or quote your offered. They’ve now pulled up the price of all third party insurances to be just below fully comprehensive forcing fully comp on everyone and usurping the law.
A cartel indeed and a bloody rip off!
So why does the law of the water, admiralty apply?
South Africa puts the third party insurance on the fuel, just increased to ZAR0.075 (seven and half cents) per litre. Unleaded retail is about R8.80/litre inland–say, a euro.
The scheme arose after the old system where drivers would buy an annual policy from the state, confirmed by a license-style disc, broke down as so many people would fail to buy a disc ( or forged) them that the Road Accident Fund became insolvent.
The system provides cover for personal injury, medical expenses (not always free in South Africa) and cost related to disability, pain, loss of earnings etc. but are capped at fairly low values. It sort of works for a third world environment.
A blunt,vague cameron-just about sums it up.
Aye
What a shit cartoon.
Only on the right. And possibly on the left. But not in the centre.
Yeah, I recognise Gollum when I see him.
Nuffing on TV to watch.
Thanks Beeb
That will be £145 please!
Kerching!
Hi , My names Tim Lovejoy and i am a BBC legend and i dont find the cartoon funny . I thank you
Try Fail Blog Tim, you’ll fit in very well there.
Stop swearing !
Fuck off Mary I can’t help it when Sarah gets my bean between her teeth.
When is PMQS back on ?
Sep 8th I think
Prime Mincing Quееr?
Sorry, that should be Pirouetting Mincing Queens.
Prime Minister’s Q ueers?
How odd.
Not really,
Can anyone please tell me who this gay Cabinet Minister is?
Blunt init ?
Noooooooooo Billy, there’s supposed to at least one more [apparently]!
Aint got a scobby then
It’ll all come out in the wash
Blunt has used his wifes fortune to fund his career into politics – didn’t have her on the payroll – ‘n now he’s kicked her into touch – what a using cynical b’strd – that’s enough in itself to disqualify him as “rep of the people” surely.
watch the News of the screwed
Why cant evrything be straight ?
It would be too easy for the batsmen. You need a bit of swing or deviation off the pitch to give the bowlers a chance.
Its a batsmans game anyway
“You need a bit of swing or deviation….”
You just can’t help it, can you Engineer?
Any engineer will tell you mechanical equipment tends to have an in-built bias, ask Gordon, the man who broke the bank at Monte Carlo.
Balls.
EU rules. Do try to keep up at the back.
Being gay doesn’t necessarily prevent a politician from having a wife and children.
6/10 for the cartoon, which is a vast improvement on the -88/10 I thought one deserved the other week.
That’s six of the best for Rich and Mark then , the lucky bastards.
You’d have thought that with the mess Cameron and co. inherited three months ago, he’d be used to being in the shit by now.
cue Mark O*ten jokes
You provocative twat.
Not really. He’s got a greedy public sector that constantly wants feeding, and all he gets for the effort is a regular whacking great dollop of debt.
Dealing with some on the opposition benches must be dealing with screaming infants, as well.
What galls me [particularly with the BBC] is that they have these stupid Labour bastards on and not once does the interviewer ask them what the f*ck they were doing for 13 years and they let them prattle on about how Labour would sort out this bloody mess, when all along it was THEM that got us into it. I wish they would scrap the licence fee and let the bastards fend for themselves. It’s the BBC/Labour Co-alition party now!
That’ll be £145 please?
Kerching!
Your blogging can not hurt us, our propaganda is like a shield of steel!
Moohahahahahahahahaha………………………….
BBC, we love we:
PAY UP OR WE’LL SEND THE GOON’S ROUND!
I’m sure the bald twat will investigate this disgraceful case of unwarranted harassment for the Watchdog programme.
oh dear you are expecting far too much from labour to think they will curl up and conceal their arrogance….they believe the crap they speel.
The beeb have so little to throw at the coalition they need the last shower to make the audience fall in to the media trap time after time.
Just don’t pay it – Google the anti-licence fee sites for info.
Hahaha… an Ann Summers ad for the ‘Rampant Rabbit G-Pulse Remote’???? Don’t your advertisers know that women are in the minority on here? (Actually, no doubt they do…).
Er… remote?
the fairer sex are in the majority on here I’ll have you know
Well, they make hands-free phones. I suppose it’s a similar principle. They do say that women are good at multi-tasking.
Listen to the expert luv, he knows what of he speaks.
There’s more than one use for a dildo sweet cakes.
do they having icing and candles ?
Candles?!??!!
Get thee to a nunnery.
Ten o’clock girls. Candles out…
..and no press ups in the cucumber patch either.
Only one complaint, Blunt should be wearing his broad ‘Vote for me’ smile.
Thankyou.
Fuckin hell , Police confisgated eggs off some people outside P*kistans team hotel , They never done that with the UAF
Bet they didn’t manage to get any bacon off them to go with the eggs.
I was hoping they would be there burning things like they did when Dave said P*akistan was responsable for terror attacks
didn’t you learn to spell and punctuate or did all the cricket crap cull your learning curve ?
The England team better watch out next time they come to a round a bout
The way things are going, they might be burning each other soon.
The Somerset chairman has just promised the P*kistan team a “warm welcome” from local supporters. Hope he didn’t mean that literally.
If the players accused are selected to play they will get stick from the crowd , My guess that the 4 will be dropped to give the series credabilty .
Quite. If those accused play, then the Somerset (and later the England) players couldn’t have any confidence in the fairness of the game, either.
I’m sure that there are innocent parties in the P*kistan dressing-room, but now even they are tainted by association.
its a shame , I heard a former umpire saying that Amirs carear is over if found guilty , Its such a shame , The last test against the convicts at begining of year is also under investigation .
And to think they cheated at Lords of all places, The accused players all got booed to the crease , If that happaned at lords what will it be like at less restrained venues ?
Could this be the end of cricket? I fucking hope so. I am creased here LMAO
several balls up the kyber are being investigated apparently
As in cricket, so in politics. Corruption in cricket devalues the game, but corruption in politics can kill people. There’s a lot of it about in P*kistan at the moment, and it makes the world a more dangerous place. Sad times.
the open joke is the belief that professional sport isn’t tainted throughout …when the money is so huge and results so vital graft will be there somewhere.
Solution. Stop playing fucking games and get serious
another no ball call again…you must be yoking
http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/cricket/bail-for-man-arrested-in-cricket-fix-probe-2065748.html
Preferable to surgery with a couple of half-bricks, I suppose.
Don’t show your eggs to the cops
or your sausage otherwise its truncheon meat up the lunch box
I just hate Labour
is it like trying to squit a bowling ball ?
That’s why we now have New Labour, smile!
I hate wimmin!
I love my Lord MandleScum, he showed me the sweet joys of the furry cup!
http://farm1.static.flickr.com/138/342341220_c3924aa99c.jpg
Please come to Labourlist
No.
Fuck off!
Slow news day
wel done, you’ve just made it ten times fucking slower.
Ah’ feel ano’tha o’ them speechyfyings a’comin on!
An’ ‘az anyone gotta sandwich . . . ? . . . patsy . . . ? . . . pie . . . ? . . . . chips . . ? . . . anything . . ? . . .
Will someone please go sploooty sploooty up my booty booty? And then drench me in fizzy orange.
Keep your chapter titles to yourself for now.
Hello boys!
Yewwww hewwww ducky, join the club!
Don’t drink Haig, be like Myers he drinks …………er Vague
is that with a squirt of Schweppes ironic or just a cream top ?
We know what he means, one slip Fawkes!
Just half a hand shandy for me, thanks.
Hague is a gism gargler
I’m going to take the cheated Libdems from you Tory swines.
The NSDLP new social democratic labour party
I like you
You like me
I’m as happy
As a girl can be
With a knick knack paddywhack
Give my cock a home
My fat botty
Needs your bone
Show me some respect you bastards, I saved the world don’t you know!
And I will prove it in my own 2,000,000 word biography complete with pictures of me with everybody famous I ever met.
One of these days, I might find either the joke or the artwork entertaining.
But not for a long while, and not today.
don’t hold your breath…break wind instead it’ll relieve the frustration and its particularly popular in the library if its wet and wild on a bank hoilday
I’m still prime minister. I won by a landslide in May. I have a mandate to govern for the next five years.
someone get him his meds
his literary agent has just been caught on video accepting £1.50 to predict on what page his world saving actions get a first mention.
Shut the fuck up Gordon, take your Lithium suppository and have a fizzy orange!
She’s still chewing my noodle!
She’s making up for lost time, awww bless her!
Erick Pickles is a fatty. fattys eat more and cause price increases. That causes inflation. Therefore fatties cause inflation. fatties are responsible for the national debt.
Re: climate camp. A nice posting from Billy Blofeld:
http://billyblofeld.wordpress.com/2010/08/24/climate-camp-the-venn-diagram/#comment-176
Its been a roller coaster ride.
Die Ann Fat Bot has jump another free taxi to the BBC News studios to slag off Mandelbum for his comments today on Ed Militwat hehehehehe!
same old tired wank
said the wanker cripple spastic crackhead innit ?
SQUAAAARRRKK!!! TaT!!! KRIPPLEKRIPPLE!! (sniff) CRACKTRAMP!!! (ping)
They look like lizards to me
First !
Nope!
You came Second and lost, remember?
Was Guido wide of the mark?
Looks like it
Eric Pickles ate us into debt
Do they not get paid with OUR money on Bank Hols?
Or are they all busy at LieBore HQ stuffing envelopes, their bellies, pockets, – and each other?
Maybe their still in Bradford smoking weed colouring each others hair pink and dancing the foxtrot with the EDL?
good news from the condems
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1307248/Locals-given-priority-immigrants-queue-council-houses.html
Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh thats it we are going home now,wash your own dishes you eeenglish Hunts
“No fewer than 310,000 council and housing association homes – around one in 12 – are now headed by someone who is not a UK citizen.”
Baroness Udin ??????
Oh yes!
And I have plenty more where they came from!
It was the systme made me do it! – that and the money!
I’ve got lots more back home.
You might want to review the insurance excess on your flood and subsidence.
Vaguely gay?
http://fxbites.blogspot.com/2010/08/vaguely-gay.html
Bo jo
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/columnists/borisjohnson/7971345/Africa-could-teach-the-wheelie-bin-lady-a-thing-or-two.html
Just a thought this could have been one of those Asian betting scams.
That camera might have been hooked up to a betting network in India
Woman ignores cat 2:1
Woman pets cat 10:1
Woman eats cat 50:1
Woman throws cat in wheelie bin 1000:1
That Nazi cu-nt Boris Johnson is in Africa a taxpayers expense, and then the telegraph pay the fuck-pig for writing that lame shite.
London is a massive cancerous growth on Britain. We should put a wall round it 50 miles in diameter and gas every one of the filthy animal inside the walls.
I like the cut of your jib
Has Hague got any spare SpAds?
She deserves an award for at least making an attempt to reduce the population of cats left to roam in streets and gardens. Vile things.
Petition your MP to raise the ft/lb limit on Air Rifles so you can shoot the fucking things without them crawling off and clogging up vet’s surgeries.
Why bother when you can buy perfectly good tuning parts. My Theoben passes 30ft/lbs.
Don’t know the fps, somewhere around 1100 with Prometheus .22′s.
Plenty death.
Erm, i’d better explain that i do NOT shoot cats with my air rifle.
I can pump mine to fuck knows what but it go’s right through cats
Crush orange peel in water and spray it around the garden. it keeps the cats away for some reason.
I’d vote for that woman.
Just give me the fucking money
bang and another mane for the wall
Has Sam cam got twitter like the beard ?
http://twitter.com/samcamno10
A fake samcam hmm? At least the real one has enough sense not to follow the unlovely sarah onto twitter.
http://twitter.com/1stFuckingLady
#Tweet – Writing a chapter about when I used to get invited to celebrity rubber chicken dinners in lieu of actually going to any these days.
Does anyone know what’s happened to dianeabbot, edballs and andy’eyeliner’burnham?
They all seem to have fell off the planet, whilst dave and ed the flowerpot men are charging around the country spewing out increasing amounts of twaddle.
I have nothing to say !
I’m contemplating the aftermath of my post-neoclassical endogenous growth theory.
It certainly fucked up the UK economy for many years to come, didn’t it ?
A solution to this idiocy presents itself. I shall combine my hatred of cats with my hatred of Labour politicians and propose that the likes of Ned Balls be tied in a bag with a breeze block and tossed in a canal.
I say, – as a change from all this, – anyone care to pop round and try my new recipe for a sausage sandwich?
It’s really yummy, – and I can spice it up to suit your taste!
No need to clear up afterwards – I’ve got a new kitchen boy.
I have left politics to spend more time with my homosexuality.
Ditto.
Everyone should have a Willy.
Its all just one big fuckin game to them init
Give us a second look please .
What part of NO don’t you understand you brain dead mong, now fuck off!
Billy Hague flocks around YCs sniffing for cock
That’s it then is it?
That’s the extent of the scandalous, disgusting behaviour we are going to get out of this Coalition?
You have to admit that labour were far superior, especially in gordon’s day, at producing shock-making headlines. This coalition looks like being rather boring in that respect.
Ed Milibland must be getting desperate. Rumour has it that he will offer a post to Diane Abutt in his shadow Cabinet. ( Private ) Education Minister ?? Transport ( free taxis ) Minister ?? Equalities ( black mums are best ) Minister ??
I have nothing more to say
That would indeed explain why we’ve heard fuck-all from your leadership campaign.
Guido
Here is a list of questions to put to the Zanu candidates :
1) Is there a deficit ?
2) How would you deal with it ?
3) Have you got any substantive policy for increasing growth apart from more debt ?
4) Are you proud that Zanu tripled the national debt in 13 years ?
When we have serious replies to these questions, we might believe that Zanu is more than a bunch of rogues, thieves, self-servers and frauds…
you must be looking for a political blog,this is a is Hague a fag blog
Q1) Is there a deficit ?
A)what’s a deficit?
Q2) How would you deal with it ?
A) I’d increase it; increasing anything is always good. taxes, spending, crime; whatever it is I’d like to increase it just like we always do here in the labour party. The only thing we don’t want to increase is hope; we need to stamp-out any glimmer of hope whenever we see it (luckily we don’t see any hope when we’re in power, so I won’t need to worry about that if I become pm, because it’ll all vanish as soon as I walk into downing street)
Q3) Have you got any substantive policy for increasing growth apart from more debt ?
A)what’s growth?
Q4) Are you proud that Zanu tripled the national debt in 13 years ?
A) we’ve tripled something? cool. that must be good then, right?
Hello boys
You will have seen my attack on Ed Geeky Milliband
In fact, it was my reply to the below the belt of Thuggie Whelan last week who has bought Ed Mllliband with union money…
But it is also what my financier friends have told me to say
They do not want a Zanu Labour party which will tax them…
Including my old chum Saint Tone who is now a multi-millionaire financier himself
So you understand that I have services to render as well…
Watch this space for my earnings soon…
Go back and tell them it will take about 500,000 per person to stop them coming for them and lynching them all
Great war – great fun !
This is turning into a mandy/bliar ( daveM) versus the kinnochioos (edM) War.
I wonder who has the most money? Of course none of it is to do with REAL labour people but there you go!
Go back and tell them it will take about 500,000 per person to stop them coming for them and lynching them all
Guido
You must not attack me and my £1 million from selling my lies……
Since I swore under oath not to publish my memoirs
I have had a nervous breakdown and several alcoholic problems since…
SO you must excuse for breaching my oath and lying to Hutton..
It is my nature to lie as you know
That is what kept the New Liebore fraud afolat for so long…
You do understand…
Please feel free to kill yourself. Chop yourself up and stick yourself in a holdall in the bath for all I care.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/politics/tony-blair/7971212/Blair-to-avoid-book-protests-with-US-trip.html
bliar’s on the run. He’s doing his book launch in America and then in Ireland but he’s cancelled his UK appearances for fear of protests. He’s going to use a taped interview with the beeb twit marr to launch his book here.
Well done beeb good to know you’re still using our license fee to do things like interviews with war criminals.
bliar’s on the run. He’s doing his book launch in ‘merica and then in Ir+l+nd but he’s cancelled his UK appearances for fear of protests. He’s going to use a taped interview with the beeb twit marr to launch his book here.
Well done beeb good to know you’re still using our license fee to do things like interviews with war criminals.
This thread is so fucked that even concrete frump and Billy Bowdens whatsistits have cleared off.
http://img839.imageshack.us/img839/6041/2fags.jpg
How many words are censored on this fucking site?
90% of the English language is auto blocked.
I’m sure this gido fucking is a n***er/joo mix.
Nope, his lineage is Guinness and curry
Holy God!!! What a lethal combination.
Its true
3/4 peat burning, stout (in every sense of the word) drinking bog trotter and 1/4 curry merchant
The Irish are the blacks of europe, and I’m sure a few j**s have ended up in a curry.
So the labour leadership contest is just about to hot up with the ballot papers coming out tomorrow.
Well ‘hot-up’ might be the wrong word for such a damp squib event that may well be eclipsed by the launch of bliar’s book due at the same time. ‘Sadly’, bliar has been forced to cancel all of his appearances here to plug his book out of fear of mass protests.
Interesting though that mandy and bliar are backing davem whilst the kinnochios are backing edm , and an internal war between the two camps is apparantly raging.
Doesn’t look like labour is going to turn into much of an opposition whoever wins.
Guido I really think you should get rid of that alcampbell chap you’ve hired to look after the modding whilst you’re havng a break.
He’s just about shut the blog down.
off message but has anyone seen nellie or has she packed her trunk and gone to mrs dale’s diary with the hump ?
this thread is playing silly buggers…items that were on earlier have now gone walkabout I give up……..hic
Ahh. confused.com, since all political tought on here seems to have died a death for the night, can you give me an insurance quote for a cruise I’m planning next year?
due to global warming there will not be any oceans next year.
Umm. You have it the wrong way round actually. pachauri says the himalayan glaciers are melting and the UEA says that the north and south poles are melting (despite scientific evidence that says ice is increasing) but never mind that.
As a consequence of their nonsense we are supposed to believe that the seas are rising. Therefore I think we all need to be taking cruises next year. Insurance companies please take note (commission payable to pachauri and jones of the uea) – good business afoot!
the Tory troll known as nell was so crap at masking her/his ID she/he gave up after multiple outings.
She is on political betting and con home.
con home figures.
O Lord please look after my mummy and my daddy.
O lord please feed the hungry
O Lord please see to it that a psycho blows Paris Hiltons brains out.
Thank you Lord
I am the 300,feed me
IPCC gets slapped down.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/environment/climatechange/7972034/IPCC-told-to-stop-lobbying-and-restrict-role-to-explaining-climate-science.html
Poor olepachauri , that independent inquiry has given him two options – give up his lucrative role of lobbying for companies claiming ‘green’ credentials (from whom he has earned loads) or start telling the truth about the lack of science that has backed the IPCC’s claims like the icecap is melting on the Himalayas!
Guess he’ll choose the first then!
He can always go back to building railways.
Well he was once an apprentice working on diesel locomotives in varanasi – not exactly environmetally friendly or very high flying – but precisely the sort of lowlife you’d expect the UN to engage as a CEO for their IPCC.
They are all about to be hanged the corrupt fuckers lol
Well I hope you are right – but the ICC , ‘we know how to trough it up with our HQ in Dubai’ has done sod all to put a stop to their very blatant corruption for the last ten years , and I rather doubt that they are going to start now!
It’s the wonderful game of cricket that’s going to be left damaged. I rather think the rest of them are going to slink away and do it all over again.
“the wonderful game of cricket”
To me that’s an oxymoron; cricket’s one of the most boring games ever invented.
Besides which, if they (the team/country in question, not the icc) are actually worrying about someone allegedly taking a bung in cricket when half their country is underwater then that’s even worse that condeeeee rice going shoe shopping when new orleans was underwater and nobody there had any water/food/toilets/medical-care.
Half their country underwater, cholera about to strike down virtually a whole generation, and the headlines are:
“nevermind the flood. this time it’s serious; this time it’s cricket”
Sorry, but I really don’t give a fuck about cricket, and I especially don’t give a fuck about cricket when half their country’s underwater and millions of people there have had their homes washed away.
Worrying about their cricket team in this instance is like worrying about your shoelace being untied after you’ve just had your foot chopped off; it really doesn’t fucking matter.
Hanging’s too good for them. They wanted no-balls, so let’s just make sure that’s what they end up with.
I like the cut of your jib young fellow me lad, if you ever at a lose end or looking for a job just give us a call!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/afghanistan/7971811/Seven-US-troops-killed-in-Afghanistan.html
Fuckin’ hell, its Ricky Gervais’s long lost twin brother!
lol .it is
revenge on the Roma
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/slovakia/7971912/Slovakia-gunman-shoots-seven-dead-in-Bratislava.html
Come away, come away with William Tell, Come away to the land he loved so well Fit a bolt to your bow, and away we go
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/russia/7963982/Vladimir-Putin-tracks-whales-with-crossbow.html
http://tvnz.co.nz/national-news/nz-expert-fibre-link-could-aid-chile-mine-rescue-3750324
Look it’s Bank Holiday. Let’s have a laugh.
prezza is trying to persuade the EU to fund fibre optics out of Ch++ina to put them onto the ch++ilean miners rescue site so that the technology can be inserted into their trapped mine and they can be ‘educated’ whilst they wait to be rescued.
I wonder how much the ch++inese are paying him to publicise that sort of rubbish – he’d know all about education wouldn’t he?
He’s got sly and devious down to a fine art.
So the fat fuck is a China asset
the hand puppet / red fat duck prezza = bought and sold by communist china
look my friends the chinese are world leaders in this fibroid optical malarkey all I am saying is if youve got trapped miners and you need to give them cable down their borehole the chinese are the ones for the job hehehe though i know a borehole or two I wouldn’t mind slipping a length inside some of the crumpet here is unbelievable but you know they do great food over here I had some crispy fried ducks feet the other night just like webbed pork scratching they were reminded me of hull again
hits have been shit today.sure they havent firewalled you fawkes for picking on Vaguey
Wow damian have you been on here all Bank Holilday Monday counting?
Pity Fawkes hasn’t been here to notice.
Does anyone find it somewhat distasteful that the uk media and the pakistani government seem to be more worried about someone allegedly taking a bung to throw a cricket game than half the country being displaced by record floods?
The uk media’s take on this seems to be:
“well, the floods were pretty bad, and maybe millions of people have lost their homes and hundreds of thousands of children are about to die from cholera, but, shit, this time it’s serious; this time it’s cricket.”
I mean, fucking cricket? Who gives a fucking fuckety-fuck-fuck about that when half the fucking country’s underwater?
If I was the pakistani PM, I’d just say “sorry, we’ve got more important things to worry about at the moment; we really don’t give a flying fuck about cricket right now.”
I’ll be on Hampstead Heath at 4am if anyone wants to give me some sploooty sploooty. Don’t forget the fizzy orange.
Aye aye captain one eye, me and me fizzy orange are cocked and ready to go, see you there big fat Scotty boy lover, over and out!
Well, I climbed my first Munroe yesterday, Ben Nevis at 4400 feet. Exceptionally, when I got to the top, there was no cloud obscuring views and the sun was shining. Truly, I was extremely fortunate. 6.25 hours there and back plus some time admiring the view and taking photos.
Even at the base of the mountain, my view forward was greater than most inhabitants of the Palace of Westminster.
Yeah, but does your 70 year old, broken down body look like our Cliffs?
http://tinyurl.com/3aev2dd
Thought not.
Don’t know why you think I am 70 years old. What do they teach you in schools nowadays? I said I was in my seventh decade some few months ago. From birth to the day before you are 10 you are in your fist decade. Now go figure.
Whatever, so you’re 69.
Try again. Wrong end. Not unusual for you chaps, I understand.
You should know, bender.
you tell ‘em Moniker…. think young be young I tell myself …unfortunately the body doesn’t always concur but thats usually because the temperatures are below 20 and the previous night’s consumption contradicts my mantra !
the climbing sounds challenging…have to stick to skiing myself..gravity assisting descent and lift in reverse !
There are 283 Munros and 227 more Munro tops (not complete mountains in themselves.) I have wondered for ages if I would have the time to do Nevis. On this trip back to the UK, I have made the time. I did not do any advanced preparation, because I am very active normally, but I did take all the advised safety stuff plus a GPS with spare batteries. Kendal Mint Cake is also excellent. Two complete bars got me up there. Really just compressed sugar but it gives a fantastic energy boost when you think you have spent it all.
Is hague
a. a poof
b. a liar
c. a poof and a liar?
none of the above…..a capable foreign secretary good orator and generally seen as a solid sort …after the last shower seems strange he should be picking up so much flak here but its obviously fashionable.
Ha!
You sank our Naveee at Mers-el-Kébir!
Now we hav yors!
All thanks to zer Brownhoon! Zer Bliarhoon! zer Camerhoon!, and zer Glorious Fuhrer RumpyPumpy!
Ha! Ha! Ha!
Eat chips rosbifs!
And be ready at Dover when vee send you our illegal imgrants!!!!!
I here the frogs will soon own Dover too
no loss the place is a dump
Any takers for scotland
Ah’ll give ye twa pun scots!
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“Cottages 4 You”
Yes please!!!
This morning I am playing farmy farmy
rrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhh
plop
sploosh
wank wank
We have a cartoon where the characters are labelled, in case we can’t recognise them, that relies on a poo joke.
This morning I am making chutney
I keep getting mixed up between claustrophobia and homophobia.
Which is the one about being in a closet?