August 14th, 2010

Spending Cuts: Real or Unreal?

Last week John Redwood advanced the argument that we will not see any overall cut in government spending during this parliament, Guido would add that the government isn’t planning on paying down a single penny of the national debt by 2015 either. Nobody challenged the Redwood-Guido contention that in cash terms there is no overall spending cut – the fact is the coalition budgets over the next 5 years to raise expenditure 15% – from some £600 billion to nearly £700 billion.  Some counter that specific expenditure programmes are already being cut because in real-terms, inflation adjusted, there will be an overall cut in government expenditure.

Last week Peter Hoskin on the Speccie’s CoffeeHouse blog produced a chart* showing an inflation adjusted real-terms spending cut of 2.7% after 5 years. Even this thinnest of salami slices doesn’t ring true, Guido is under the impression that the Treasury aims to keep spending flat in real terms. Peter was kind enough to supply the spreadsheet showing his workings.

Peter used a combination of HM Treasury sources to calculate his deflator (red). If however we plug in the Bank of England’s inflation target of 2% things come out different (orange). Mervyn King was warning us only last year, when he was making the case for printing money (QE), that it was deflation that was the coming threat. Nevertheless if we ignore his previous scaremongering and accept that he will meet the Bank of England’s 2% average inflation target over the term of the parliament, the result is a real terms cut of 0.2%. That is a rounding error, not a significant real terms cut in government expenditure. Based on the Bank of England’s inflation target, government spending by 2015 compared to 2010 will be flat in real terms.

Contrary to the BBC-Guardian cuts narrative, the reality is that there is going to be a real terms spending freeze, the coalition is planning a spending hike of 15% in cash terms, it isn’t planning real terms cuts and it isn’t planning to pay down a penny of the national debt. The deficit unfortunately will still be with us come the next general election…

*Fraser Nelson has other 21st century modernisation plans besides charts for the Speccie under his kilt. Expect to see changes to the magazine’s cover, look and feel.


  1. 1
    • 61
      missing the point spectacularly says:

      No slashing of jobs or public services Mr Fawkes ?
      Or is this just so much idealogical semantic wank over five year forecasts.

      There are going to be massive cuts and the Coalition isn’t stupid enough to try and disguise it or pretend it isn’t going to happen in it’s narrative.


      • 79
        Fooking Twats says:

        Payday loans companies with interest rates of 2265% are not being refused loans from the banks regardless of how much they ask for.


      • 90

        There are going to be public sector job losses, but they won’t be massive. Unfortunately.


        • 96
          That's not what the Coalition is saying says:

          So all Cameron and Osbornes talk about 25-40% cuts in departments are lies in your opinion ?


          • They don’t “talk about 25-40% cuts”. If you read above it is about overall spending not individual expenditure programmes.


          • That's not what the Coalition is saying says:

            The most significant moment in George Osborne’s Budget came when the Chancellor confirmed that he will cut spending on all non-protected departments (everything except Health and International Development) by 25 per cent on average.

            Cabinet ministers were ordered by the Treasury to plan for unprecedented cuts of 40% in their departmental budgets as the coalition widens the scope of its four-year austerity drive.


          • That's not what the Coalition is saying says:

            The Chancellor confirmed that he will cut spending on all non-protected departments (everything except Health and International Development) by 25 per cent on average.


          • That's not what the Coalition is saying says:

            Cabinet ministers were ordered by the Treasury to plan for unprecedented cuts of 40% in their departmental budgets.


          • Seymour Clearly says:

            Both guido and the BBC are right. Government spending will stay flat, government spending on services, whether dole or aircraft carriers will drop.

            The difference is that we will be spending an increasing amount on interest in various forms. All the disadvantages of government spending with none of the societal benefits. Thank you Gordon, thanks a fucking bunch.


          • Seymour Clearly says:

            Interest payments on debt are now 35 billion, and forecast to be 75 billion in 2015, provided we can maintain our credit rating. The 40 billion difference is why we have overall spending flat with cuts.

            Wouldn’t it be useful to spend that 40 billion on something more useful? Either guns,butter or tax cuts rather than pissed up the wall by Gordon.


          • Tory and Labour = Two cheeks of the same Blairite arse says:

            Cameron was a stupid cun’t to promise to match Labour spending then wasn’t he, if thought it was so out of control?
            He can hardly bitch about profligate Brown when he planned to match his spending commitments.
            And it was stated Conservative Policy right up until Brown’s incompetence allowed the Bankers to fuck the entire economy and the taxpayer. Then Cameron was all about the cuts.


        • 103
          Must get a pseudonym one day says:

          Maybe not massive. but certainly substantial. But the immediate problem is one of cash-flow. The sheer cost of the public downsizing exercise, allowing for redundancy payments, early pension payments, increases in benefits, reductions in tax revenues, plus the general ‘costs of change’ in so many functions of government, will take years to work through the accounts. Hence the lack of any real overall reduction in spending in the near future.

          But, once the change exercise is complete (trusting you here, Pickles), the cash-flow will reflect the lower operating costs and true reduction should be feasible……..If we believe the direction Dave & Co are taking.

          Don’t forget, it took Blair and Brown 13 full and profligate years to get us into this shit – it’s going to take that period at least to see any real signs of getting out of it.


          • Gordon Brown says:

            Don’t fucking blame me, it all started in America an I saved the world!


          • Bystander says:

            So … is this ‘government’ going to cut or not?

            And by cut I mean sever / cleave / reduce in size . . . and not to build up again in another department.

            NHS / ‘Universities’ / QUANGOs / Town Halls / Global Warming Scams / Inquiries into matters of dubious interest / ‘Consultants’ – all must bear CUTS

            No mealy mouthed words, no platitudes, no prevarication – as per the last lot.

            Yes or No ?


          • Fine Hewing Axe says:

            Like the cut of your jib there Bystander!

            There is so much shit to cut out there I’d be spoiled for choice, you can’t go wrong after 13 years of spend thrift ZaNuLiebour.


          • Ruthelss cuts plus ruthless sentences says:

            You forgot to add taking back from the banks with a vicious interest rate for the gambling they went about .at the end of the day its banks we will pay,so I say lets start with a halving of the debt.warrants issued for the banks top tier management.Child killers are rare because because nonces know there is no out for them.Intolerance of bankers is what is needed.


    • 210
      Anonymous says:

      Talking about cuts: Certain people in and around Number 10 are getting a bit jumpy about the current business secretary, Vince Cable. The word on the street is that he will be ‘encouraged’ to stand as London Mayor in 2012. “He’s too much of an obstical in the Coalition already”. Take note that Boris has yet to throw his hat into the ring…..and the LibDems still haven’t detailed their selection process….It couldn’t have crossed Clegg/Cameron’s thoughts to use ‘one stone’ as it were surely? Maybe thinking out loud should start taking the shape of private walks and talks in the rose garden…..Civil servants have ears and all that.


      • 350
        Sukyspook says:

        The first and most important cut should be to leave the EU – save at least £52billion per annum for starters.

        Exiting the beast system is entirely possible and is in the best interest of all right-thinking human beings as opposed to corporate ‘persons’.


  2. 2
    Gordon Brown says:

    As prime minister, I will make a statement to the House in half an hour.


    • 50
      Schrödinger's cat says:

      ….. yes?


      • 118
        Fiddler-Diddler says:

        I think this means that Gordon has plucked up the courage to step outside his front door and is going to talk to the roses around the door.

        It is a step forward on the road to recovery … just a shame it is not our national finances recovery though


        • 222
          50 Calibre says:

          If you really believe that McTwat has the guts to do anything at all other than dictate his new best seller whilst lying down in a darkened room and dreaming of what might have been if he wasn’t such a deranged arsehole, you might believe anything…


          • Gordon ‘Incapability’ Brown says:

            Here is an excerpt from Chapter 34 of my new book:

            “My heart leapt with joy and anticipation when I heard the new President’s name was Mr Barry O’Bummer. As in so many things, I was to be cruelly disappointed.”

            Next week, an excerpt from Chapter 35 of My New Book:

            “How I begin to acknowledge my mistakes: a necessary step on the Path To Recovery”


          • Brokeback 'Heir to Blair' Cameron says:

            My heart leapt with joy and anticipation when I went to visit Mr Barry O’Bummer. As in so many things, I was to be cruelly disappointed.
            He only shot his load over my face and not in my mouth like Nick does.


  3. 3
    Toryboy says:

    Excellent stuff Guido, apart from the last bit. The massive national debt will still be with us come the next election (at around 1.3 trillion instead of 900 billion as it is now) but the structural deficit will be close to zero, the cyclical deficit will be zero (barring another recession or similar disaster), so post-2015 (maybe 2014 if the economy does very well), we will be in a position to start paying off the national debt.


    • 4

      You better tell the Chancellor, he is predicting a £20 billion deficit in 2015.


      • 5
        Toryboy says:

        20 billion is neither here nor there, compared to the current position of 170bn though. If the excellent Eurozone growth figures from yesterday and the Q2 1.1% (much bigger than expected) figures prove to be the future trend, there is every chance of having a surplus in 2015-16. I admit you’re probably right to stick to the OBR forecast though – I’ll be very interested to see the one that accompanies the PBR after the spending review!


        • 9
          The Beast of Clerkenwell says:

          F ucking cockwaffle!
          You sound like McMental
          Get it into your head that this country produces fuck all that people want
          We cant even feed ourselves anymore
          Its over


          • Schrödinger's cat says:

            Hard to tell the difference between us and Iceland.


          • eric prickles says:

            Iceland is a high street retail shop selling frozen food.


          • Unsworth says:

            Isn’t that Bejam?


          • Anonymous says:

            Lady Thatcher decided we didn’t need a manufacturing sector.

            She was a fucking idiot.

            You only have to look at her children to see that.


          • Actually says:

            No dickwad, The USSR wanted to destroy our manufacturing so they would win the cold war and then your commie mates in China decided they wanted a manufacturing sector and thus all the commies in England following orders from the International meetings decided to lead the gullible working class mugs to trash their own industries and slit their own throats and future prospects and here we are in the shit today.

            HOW IS THAT EQUALITY WORKING OUT? Yeah you can tell the Peoples Republic China really believes in that while invading Africa to suck out their resources and using us to get the resources out of Afghanistan and Iraq for them.

            Funny coincidence how Russia and China are on the rise after adopting capitalism and we are on the downfall for adopting the brands of communism they recommended for us.


          • Circus Maximus says:

            So the old Pirate gunboat nation gets its comeuppance. I wonder what the rest of the world we abused has in store for us. I know from an Iranian who was very angry that his grand fathers generation all had to smoke opium for a penny a pipe if they wanted to eat. All the family had to do it just to earn enough for one small meal.The purer residue in the pipe was then shipped to England for the dens of London etc.Fortunately he saw the ordinary people of the UK as just as much abused by its leaders as they had been,so look out leaders its you the rest of the world want the blood of. I for one would buy a ticket for the show.


          • Got the camper van loaded with tins, dried food and weaponry and have a bolthole planned Beast – if I were you I’d be prepared :P


        • 10

          £20 billion is the equivalent of 10p off the basic rate of income tax.


        • 13
          albacore says:

          With Pickles the hero of the hour on the back of illusory savings of £50 million from disappearing the Audit Commission, £20 billion is very big potatoes indeed.
          What is neither here nor there is whether it’s Dave or Gordon making a sow’s ear out of a silk purse.


          • Anonymous says:

            Yeah but he’s going to outsource the work to the private sector.

            How much is that going to cost?

            Or will the private sector be doing the work pro bono, big society style?


          • "Pickles the hero of the hour" says:

            Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha !

            What a nauseating lickspittle.
            Pickles might let you eat the crumbs from his table little CCHQ minion.


        • 14
          Schrödinger's cat says:

          So five years just to balance the books but several generations, including those yet unborn, to pay off the debt which we could have avoided.

          Not good, is it?


          • Ruth Kelly's plaything says:

            No, it’s not good. But let’s not pass up a single opportunity to point out whose foul-up this is.

            It’s the sole property of Gordon McMental and it’s on such a scale that it would take ANY govt more than a couple of parliaments to unravel.

            Elinor Goodman was on R4 this morning sounding like Pollytwaddle, with a TU gen sec, a Lab MP and a renegade Tory – nice, balanced panel there wich did its job (of peddling the BBC’s political line in relation to the coalition).


          • Schrödinger's cat says:

            Agree, but it still does not take away the problem. Where you said, “more than a couple of parliaments to unravel”, I would replace ‘parliaments’ with generations, a factor of five.


          • Blame everything on the last guy for the next five years says:

            Not working too well for Obama is it ?


          • Schrödinger's cat says:

            Oba ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ma.


          • happy to be fucked together says:

            Dying fucked in a desert,tongue cracked lips peeled but joy and happiness blaming labour.


          • Dubya, the warmongers chimp says:

            he he he! you can’t blame me. nobody cares about the last guy


      • 110
        MI5 says:

        I think you are ahead of the Treasury on this Guido

        And most of the Lib Dem Coalition !

        As for the Labour party, it does not even know what time of day it is, let alone how to calculate the deficit..amateur spiteful retards…

        Well done again…


        • 116
          MI5 says:


          If you have a moment…

          1) Do these figures take into account PFI and off balance sheet finance ?

          2) They assume Britain retains its AAA rating. Is that reasonable given the deficit is not being reduced sufficiently ?


  4. 6
    Genghiz the Kahn says:

    Will the B of E be given a new inflation target?

    It doesn’t seem to have had much success meeting the current one in the last four years. Is Call Me Dave going to avoid creating the impression that he will allowsome inflation to erode the value of government debt?


    • 93
      Freedom Party says:

      As The Economist said years ago

      “The effect of inflation on national debt is that of a sophisticated renege”

      Knowing Cameron, and the Troglodite Labourites would have done it even more, he will let inflation rise to “renege” a little…

      Easy way out…


  5. 7
    Nick2 says:

    If the UK’s still running an annual deficit by 2015 then the country will take much longer to pay down previous (Nu Lab) borrowings, if it ever does.

    By not grasping the nettle now, the ConDems leave the way open to a Nu Lab successor victory in 2015. And if Labour gets in again they’ll fuck up the country just as they have always done.

    What the economy needs are real public sector spending cuts. Anything less will still leave us with huge annual interest payments. And with the ConDems picking painless options, that’s unlikely to happen in time/if ever.


    • 177
      Ruth Kelly's plaything says:

      Yep, dead right. Almost everything cuttable needs to be cut.

      Whatever you think about Trident, all the lefties want to cancel it in order to maintain public sector jobs and perks. That makes me (a sceptic about big, expensive, shiny, new nukes – what’s wrong with our old, rusty RAF ones?) suspicious that Trident could actually be a good thing.

      Unlike the lefties, I put defence of the realm above current consumption. Hence, for me, the Forces come way above the idle buggers in the public sector that I used to work with.

      Trident would be wasted expenditure except as a Keynesian exercise in reviving our engineering sector (I assume that bits of it would be made in the UK?). Keynes’s recipe worked in the 1930s by spending money we didn’t have in order to get the economy moving, an economy that could then be taxed to repay the initial imvestment. Now we’ve got almost the inverse – a huge debt and a sluggish economy. It’ll take Nobel Prize economics to get us out of that.

      Would we ever use Trident? Dunno, but as the man said, the non-use of nukes since 1946 proves they’ve worked. Simplistic, trite, but just possibly true….in the context of 1946 to 2000. But now the game’s different – would Trident be of use? I can’t see it deterring China from invading the UK. They obliterate us, we knock off (say) a fifth of their population. I think that makes them the winner….but then why would they want a radioactive wasteland off the N coast of Europe? This calls for Nobel Prize strategics.

      I don’t envy my children and grandchildren.


      • 209
        £100 Billion of U.S. Weapons of Mass Destruction says:

        Why would we want a Nuclear boondoggle we don’t even control ?
        Trident can’t even be targetted never mind fired without the U.S. say so and technology.

        If the yanks want to use Britain as a Nuclear Missile base let them fucking pay 100 Billion for it.


        • 257
          Anonymous says:

          Same old lefty / marxist lie.

          If the country was to suffer a surprise attack the final word on use is/was left to the captain and crew of the Boat.

          Been said and reported offten over the last 30 years. The Boats are built to survive and act independently. Stupid.


          • £100 Billion of British Taxpayers money for U.S. Weapons of Mass Destruction says:

            The Trident weapon is American, and it’s guidance system is controlled by American satellites. They could incapacitate or disable it in seconds so it is clearly NOT independent.

            The government even admits that Trident is a commingled pool of US/UK missiles.

            If the country was to suffer a surprise attack then that £100 Billion was a colossal waste of money wasn’t it ? It deterred no-one.
            And it isn’t deterring north korea or anyone else from developing nukes.

            How much fucking good is £100 Billion worth of Trident doing us is Afghanistan ? You taxpayer spending mad Brownite profligate twat.

            And where this trident is currently aimed and where do you think it should be aimed in the future?
            Is it at the gaffe-prone White House and its anti-British rhetoric?

            Same old Bush / NeoCon warmongering idiocy from a retard.

            Fuck off and take your useless cold war relic with you imbecile.


  6. 8
    Gordon Brown says:

    Mummy says I’ve been a good boy today and can have a fizzy orange with my dinner!


    • 12
      Gordons Mum says:

      Gordon its “supper” or “Lunch”
      Dinner is for grown ups
      Now f uck of back to your attic room before I flog you with The Bible
      And no playing with your immoral compass


    • 52
      Schrödinger's cat says:

      As he has just separated from his wife, you will have to ask him.


      • 82
        Horatio says:

        You would need to be an Admiral to sail up her estuary you will never see either side


        • 100
          Schrödinger's cat says:

          As a seafarer myself, I have to confess that I am in uncharted waters. (Or do I mean uncatted waters?)


  7. 11
    P. Doff says:

    The only big number I can understand (just, given the history of the team) is that newly promoted Blackpool are heading the Premiership… being 4-0 up against Wigan! This Tangerine Dream will boost the booze and fish ‘n’ chips economy of that seaside hole.

    OK, I’ll fuck-off now… saving anyone the necessity to make the first comment to that effect!


  8. 16
    Banana Republic says:

    Could you overlay revenue?


  9. 17
    bazzaofhorsham says:

    The bank of England and the MPC have proven themselves totally incapable of forecasting inflation having gotten it wrong for 41 out of 50 consecutive months and yet here we are with people still taking what they say as gospel instead of demanding resignations.


  10. 19
    Wheatchief says:

    “The deficit unfortunately will still be with us come the next general election”.
    The deficit unfortunately will still be with us come the next generation.


  11. 24
    Ex-chancellor of the ex and Prime Moron says:

    Have you taken inflation into account?, I’m up to 20,000 words a day now.


    • 34
      The Beast of Clerkenwell says:


      “WHY I l ike Shagging Women”

      He is having it ghost written as he understands the concept just as well as he understands courage and econoomics


      • 49
        Schrödinger's cat says:

        I think the only thing he ever understood about Courage was when he drank a pint of it.


      • 54
        streamfisher says:

        Must be the ghost writer of Christmas past, will our hero give Tiny Tim a jolly good Goose?, wait for further penny dreadful instalments now available at all good Kirkcaldy street corners from an urchin.


  12. 27
    Invincible Cable says:

    I’ll sort it after my holidays


  13. 29
    BonusMyArse says:

    Even the pigs are at the trough


  14. 32
    Wheatchief says:

    Looks like Nicks freedom site has a modder worse than Fawkes.


  15. 38
    Wheatchief says:

    Later chaps,I’m going poaching.


  16. 40
    Ruth Kelly's plaything says:

    Why has the spreadsheet not come out on my screen? Instead I’ve got a little red cross in a square.


  17. 41
    Breaking says:

    Funs kicked off in your old land Guido.


  18. 56

    I’ve always considered David Cameron to be a communist


  19. 58
    Charlie Whelan says:

    I am man with my own mind for fucks sake.

    If I choose to back Ed Balls for Labour leader that’s my fucking business and I will let the rest of Unite vote for the likely winner, Ed Miliband

    Good Night


  20. 60
    Charlie Whelan says:

    Thought your site ripe for a Charlie Whelan take-over

    Look who I bumped into at the Gay Hussar!.

    And no,it’s not Guido Fawkes


  21. 62
    Ed Balls says:

    Site is not fit for purpose.


    • 98
      Bob says:

      You are not fit for any purpose, Blinky

      So just go and wash the dished, like Dolly, and leave it to Eva…


  22. 68
    IntimidatingMyArse says:

    “Talking to The Sunday Telegraph on her campaign plane, she refused to speculate on the reasons – and whether, as some suggest, her own lack of a family as an unmarried career politician makes her even more intimidating to already apprehensive Australian men.”

    Intimidating?, they should have had Margaret Thatcher as PM, poor lambs.


  23. 69
    Mzzz. 'Mad' Hatty HaHaHaHaPerson says:

    My Heroic Husband deserves every comfort and relief that I can offer him.


  24. 73
    Vince Fssst Cable says:

    The conservatives ,fsst,and the libdems crossed their wires ,crackle,when they joined up to form the condems,people think its a new party, phhhht


  25. 74
    The Establishment says:

    we don’t need to have any real cuts in anything so long as the very gullible British electorate believes what we say and does what we demand. The last thing we need is any sign that we are worried. However, I did lose £2million on Royal Ascot


  26. 77
    Moaty says:

    I’m on the telly on Wednesday


    • 162
      Pc David Rathband says:

      I know but I wont be able to watch it though!


      • 170
        Long Memory says:

        I’m not so sure,the program not long ago showed you at the round a bout were Moaty shot you and you said “See were that white car is now,That’s were I was”.To direct attention to a visual object is something only the sighted can do.


  27. 78
    Petunia Winegum says:

    Frazer Nelson has that Scottish hune got a cleft pallet?

    I cannot understand a word the twat says on TV


    • 102
      Kevin, friend of Rupert says:


      Frazer is a nice guy and very reasoable for a Jock…

      But he badly needs elocution lessons…

      Before we flog Jockland and its citizens to the Russians…(in exchange for a regular supply of oil)

      And BTW

      Why is the Scottish National Party no longer seeking independence ?

      Do they realise they would just become a third world country without English cash , especially having bailed out their banks ??!!


      • 151
        Frazer Neocon says:

        Nelson is a neocon twat and was a cheerleader for Iraq.


        • 202
          Jock the media pig says:

          He’s a pleasant enough sort of chap, but he couldn’t kick arse if he had an extra leg.


          • Lord Carrington's Binoculars says:

            I think Frazer grew up in Morningside, Edinburgh. That’s the posh area and the accent is all over the shop as they try not to sound like Cyldeside dockers.


          • Lord Carrington's Binoculars says:

            I think Frazer grew up in Morningside, Edinburgh. That’s the posh area and the accent is all over the shop as they try not to sound like Clydeside dockers.


          • Just back from the Lord Nelson says:

            Give the wheel in the middle a twiddle, and that double vision should merge into a monocular post.


          • P. Doff says:

            Nice one Horatio… that was very funny.


  28. 81
    englisheccentric says:

    Don’t be a tool Fawkes. Nominal GDP should rise 4-5% p.a, so holding public spending flat is a pretty severe squeeze.


  29. 86
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Nominal GDP= Politically convenient Guestimate.


  30. 89
    Mary Whitehouse says:

    I wondered why that prick Draper had it in for Guido,now I know its us lot who post and because he won’t censor us.


    • 94
      Mistic Smeg says:

      Anyone who is offended by those particular comments has got a serious problem. Pitiful, isn’t it ?


      • 106
        Dead Franks says:

        Its a cruel world and Draper needs to accept it,and anyway fuck the PC brigade,if it offends them then more of it.


      • 121
        albacore says:

        How curious, though, that one of such tender sensibilities should propagate yet further that which provokes in him so dire an attack of the vapours.


    • 108
      Rupert says:

      This was in 2009…

      Dolly is washing dishes at home now – all washed up and tarred and feathered…

      Driven out of the Blogoshere for being part of McBride’s libellous smear and dirty rticks operation, run out of 10 Dowing Street to their eternal shame, on behalf of Gordon Brown

      He has the credibility of Goebbels attacking the free press…


    • 111
      Dolly is doing the dishes says:

      Here is a nice little reply on Labour List at the time (2009) !

      Addressed to Dolly :

      “At the next Election, whatever you do, you are going to get a righteous kicking, and you will fully deserve it. Labour is an absolute unmitigated disaster and a disgrace from top to bottom. You have achieved nothing, and broken much.

      Shame on the lot of you.”

      An ex Labour supporter


      • 142
        Anthony Soprano says:

        barabing barabong


      • 211
        Arnie says:

        Do you call winning 200+ seats a kicking?
        I call that a victory on the scale of Dunkirk considering the facts.
        There’s no accounting for the imbecility of the British electorate when it comes to voting for the same old tired politicians.
        They’ll be back, as soon as the new collection of thieves implode.


    • 137
      Georghiu, The one legged Rumanian roofer says:

      Greetings to Mr Derek.
      Fawke’s hasn’t got a leg to stand on


    • 157
      Engineer says:

      Draper is very easily offended, isn’t he? Which takes most of the fun out of it…

      I’d take him a bit more seriously if he either grew a beard or got rid of the bum-fluff from his face.


  31. 91
    Scummy Baggio says:

    Not much trouble yet but it looks like its expected when it gets dark.


  32. 92
    Sikus Fukus says:

    I have an itchy dick.Maggie’s fanny would give it a good scratching


  33. 101
    Nick Clegg says:

    I can’t believe it. I’m in charge!


  34. 112
    James42 says:

    So what is behind the misinformation? Why are the Tories preaching doom and gloom when Guido’s reality says its not?


    • 152
      spin liars says:

      someone’s full of shit


    • 221
      Drink Typing says:

      What this shows is NuLiebour took no real action at the start of the banking crisis and carried on as per usual. Knowing full well that with an election coming and the polls not looking too good for them they could put the whole thing on the back burner. The proof is everywhere, promising funding for this that and the other and then when they’d lost and the new government walked in to office they found a note on the treasury desk saying “There’s no money left”. You can’t do that and promise money left right and centre.

      With this in mind, the real situation is that the current cuts that are now taking place and in the near future are just to cover this Liebour delay, Liebour are a party that cares more for itself that the country. If anything this tells all people of the UK what their really about!

      ConDem are taking the hard decisions, the ones Lieboaur wouldn’t take and left for the next government. But everything seems to run at a snails pace, as it’ll be 2015 before we are balanced and in a position to start making some inroads in to this national debt. Who knows what will happen at the next general, but what needs to happen in the UK is no more Liebour socialist pie in the sky utopia bullshit dreams for 20 years at lease. We need a stable long lasting realistic administration to take hard long term decisions for the benefit of the country as a whole. I really do hope our democracy can deliver that, because we need that more than ever right now.
      I guess most of you guys already know this!

      I’ve had too much to drink again, haven’t I?


      • 224
        It doesn't add up says:

        So why did Cameron promise to match Browns spending plans right up until he and the Banks fucked the economy ?

        That’s not someone who was making hard decisions or caring much about the deficit or levels public spending.

        That was the Heir to Blair copying the Blairite tactics of 97 when Blair matched Conservative spending plans.


      • 242
        the old Dufflebag says:

        not drink but too much senakot perhaps


  35. 113
    Benny Fitz says:

    Pile the problems up for the under 60s,higher taxes,later retirement,more
    regulations,extend the restrictions,telly 7 nights a week,Saturdays at
    Sainsbury’s,whitewashed barn in Picardy, maybe 2 bottles of Sauvignon on
    anniversaries, pay up time for Mammon,,,,cant fault it…………..enjoy


  36. 114
    Magnolia says:

    I want the eighties back and we won’t get it like this.
    I’m listening to The Style Council tracks to reminisce.
    Those Eton nobs are too young to know what they’re doing.
    We need some mertitocratic Grammar School plebs to put them right.


  37. 119
    Engineer says:

    Not altogether sure what to make of this.

    It seems from the figures that the much-heralded “cuts” are mostly a reduction in capital expenditure, and revenue will remain pretty much the same (growth in cash terms, reduction in real terms). So it is unlikely that there will be massive public sector redundancies. That would shoot the Unions’ fox – can’t really justify a winter of discontent if the massive job losses fail to materialise. A slowing of capital expenditure will have more effect on the private sector, which would do most of the work – so that just means that private sector growth is not quite as fast.

    There might be some smart politics here – prepare the public for the worst, then the actuality isn’t so bad. Deficit reduction would still be faster than Labour’s target of halving it over a Parliament, but not fast enough to enrage the public sector Unions, or hand political advantage to the opposition.

    Rather a fine line to tread, but it could neutralise most of the Left’s arguments if it did work.


    • 122
      Engineer says:

      Sorry – to make that clearer, for “revenue” read “current expenditure”.


    • 124
      MI5 says:

      It can easily work; Engineer

      Especially if Treasury/B of E connive to inflate a little too much…

      But it just passes the increasing debt to the next generation

      And risks the AAA credit rating…


      • 135
        Engineer says:

        Also perhaps a bit hard on the poor old private sector, which has taken all the pain so far, and on savers who will take even more of a hit if inflation does edge up. (Some early encouragement for the latter would be appreciated, please.)

        The private sector deserves a break (actually, it’s more important than that – increasing tax revenues depend on growth). Early action to encourage private sector growth (red tape reductions, tax breaks on capital investment, easing the burdens of employing people, etc) are essential. Come on, Vince Cable, we’re waiting…


        • 165
          there are no easy answers says:

          The private sector will not be cheering if the public sector jobs cull is as bad as Cameron and Osborne were predicting.

          The idea that there is always a clearly delineated demarcation between public and private sector is a myth. The private sector relies on a huge amount of public sector contracts these days and there’s going to be a big knock on effect if that public sector is slashed by 25% or thereabouts.


          • Engineer says:

            If the figures under discussion are to be believed (and they do originate from Treasury forecasts) public spending (current expenditure) isn’t going to be cut, so hospitals will still be buying bedlinen and government offices will still be buying paperclips. The reductions are in capital expenditure – money not yet spent, so it isn’t a cut, just less future spending.

            The imprortance of the public sector to the private is sometimes exaggerated. If the private sector did not trade with clients other than the public sector, it could not generate profits to be taxed to pay for public sector activity.


          • Some of the private sector relies on public sector contracts, sure – but it’s up to those companies to weather the storm by either becoming more efficient or relying less on such contracts.

            A lot of the so-called ‘private sector’ contractors are in fact just ex-council types who have joined the outsourcing trend – diversity consultants, change consultants, healthcare consultants and the like. They are mostly penpushing parasites who add no value whatsoever, and I’d happily see them all down the Job Centre along with the currently employed boxtickers who need to go as well.

            Yes, a reduction in capital spending will have a knock on effect on the building industry, but that’s on its arse these days and when the Poles go home there will be plenty of jobs still to go round. Same with the IT – perhaps the councils and government departments could try employing competent staff rather than contracting every simple installation out to Indians?

            A huge contraction in the public sector is needed just to see what is left of the real economy after 13 years of misrule and profligacy. Then we can start to grow.


          • double dip says:

            it’s lucky that these private sector businesses and jobs who have anything to do with the public sector are ‘bad’ and not needed

            no doubt an extraordinary amount of these bad private sector businesses and jobs only have themselves to blame for being stupid enough to be caricatures and generalisations drawn straight out of the Daily Mail pop-up book of stereotypes

            what’s needed are the trustworthy captains of finance from the nations banks to show the public sector how it’s done


          • ‘drawn from the Mail book of stereotypes’

            Funnily enough, they are drawn from my working life, where I have had the misfortune to deal with the public sector far too much over the past few decades.

            But don’t let my observations spoil your fun as you defend the indefensible and, in your turn, caricature the private sector as rapacious and banker-led.

            Pip Pip!


          • P. Diddy Dacre and his Mailgoloid Army says:

            Sadly your ‘real life’ is obviously culled from the most hilarious ramblings of the Daily Mail. All you needed was an asylum seeking gypsy and you had the full set.

            The point about the Banks is they are no caricature or generalisation.
            They brought the entire economy to it’s knees. Public and private sector.
            You must have been asleep at the time so they didn’t spoil your fun.

            So good luck as you defend the indefensible in the Bankers.

            Toodlepip old fruit!


        • 181
          Anonymous says:

          “Also perhaps a bit hard on the poor old private sector, which has taken all the pain so far”
          That would be all those corporate directors of banks, public services run by private sector PLC’s governing water, power and transport, Tesco’s and their dominant crontrollers of the consumer markets, the Media moguls who feed us bullshit. as well as MP’s lobbying and other outside interests.
          Yeah, they’re really feeling the pinch.


          • Engineer says:

            Woolworths? The Redcar steel plant? The construction industry? Bricklayers ain’t paid banker-style wages….


          • Anonymous says:

            “Bricklayers ain’t paid banker-style wages….”

            They’re hardly paid at all. But that’s okay cos Dave-the-Rave and the Bankers will pay other people’s money to keep us in the EU and have even more foreigners swamping Britain.

            Vote liblabcon – you know they’re all cυnts.


    • 132
      Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! says:

      I’m sure the Unions would be gutted if “massive job losses fail to materialise.”

      What a retard.


      • 138
        Engineer says:

        Think about it. Some of them have made no secret of the fact that they’re spoiling for a fight. If they end up with no excuse for a fight, some of them are going to look like right chumps…..


        • 143
          If they end up keeping their jobs they'll look like chumps ?? sure they will says:

          Oh get a grip FFS.

          They’re spoiling for a fight because of continuous talk of massive job cuts.
          If they don’t happen they’ll be celebrating.

          Or perhaps you think people who are in fear of losing their jobs will curse and shake their fist at the Lib Con coalition for keeping their jobs ?

          Yes that certainly is very plausable.


          • Engineer says:

            Unions – not union members. There’s a difference….


          • jobs good, no jobs bad says:

            The members are the Unions.
            What you mean is you think there might be one or two in the Leadership of some Unions who fancy doing a Scargill.
            Even if there is unless the Union members agree and think their jobs are under real threat, those bosses are pissing in the wind.
            So if the Union members keep their jobs those Union Bosses will just claim victory over the Coalitions cuts programme.

            It’s academic anyway because the cuts are are going to happen.
            So we’ll see soon enough what the public thinks of it all.


          • Those that didn't vote LibLabCon says:

            Listening to a senile, retired old engineer fretting about his final salary pension scheme being damaged by the unwillingness of the present day workers to cut their standard of living in order to keep him in Theakstons old peculier and incontinence pants, fair plucks the heartstrings.


          • ommmmmmmmmmm says:

            your an angry chap,you should meditate


          • Engineer says:

            10 pints of Fullers Pride and a quick delve up nell’s dirtbox in the carpark, makes one sleep the sleep of the just.


          • Engineer says:

            Troll at August 15th, 10:51pm.

            Bet you think you’re sooooooo clever, don’t you?


          • Engineer says:

            That’s August 14th…


          • T Woodelyhead says:

            I would make capitol out of winning by talk no job cuts ,see I just did it there a bit.


    • 139
      it's all a cunning plan says:

      Cameron is just keeping his powder dry.

      For another five years.


      • 145
        Wyert Twerp says:

        not a good tactic when the gunslingers come to town.


        • 147
          it's all a cunning plan says:

          but an all too common yet hilarious comment on this blog for months before the election right up until election day when he failed to win the majority.


    • 171
      Bystander says:

      One of the oldest PR tricks – goes back to Biblical times.

      King David (he of the sling shot) was an expert.

      But you have to lay your credentials on the line first.


  38. 123
    Trev says:

    All of which shows how difficult cutting spending is once it is out of the bottle.

    If there are no ‘cuts’ why is everyone screaming blue murder. Why is there talk of 25% cuts in departmental budgets and thousands of redundancies. Its not a fantasy.

    Part of the problem is that it is programmes that are being cut – programmes initiated by labour but for which there are no budgets.

    But once the spending juggernaut is let loose it is difficult to stop.

    The cuts and spending restraints we are seeing set out now will control the inexorable rise. But its going to be a while before we see any reduction of the national debt. The deficit has to be actually turned into a surplus.

    This is the scale of Browns legacy – the shocking level of debt he has dumped on us. You and others talk about how useless he was but – well HE WAS! And its no easy task to waft it all away, not without destroying the economy and quite possibly fermenting insurrection. If you want to recognise Browns disaster you have to recognise the difficulty in clearing up the mess.

    Remember spending went UP under Mrs thatcher as well.


    • 134
      Spinning on a 5 year forecast says:

      The Treasury order Ministers to prepare 40% cuts too.

      That’s probably just to put the fear of God into one or two Ministers, but the ringfenced departments like Health means someone is going to be landed with cuts of more than 25%.

      Education ? Transport ? Defence ?


      • 140
        Must get a pseudonym one day says:

        If only Eric Pickles was Chief Secretary to the Treasury instead of the ginger boy-scout………..


        • 144
          lolol says:

          Great idea.

          Put fatboy in charge of cuts.



          • Anonymous says:

            Well, he magnanimously ceased claiming £200 a month in food bills when then the expenses scandal broke, so on the theory of set a thief to catch a thief, he’s not a bad choice.
            Perhaps he could be fitted with some sort of ring round the throat like fishermen used to put on Cormorants to stop them swallowing the fish.


          • stop eating you fat fuck says:

            or just make his ministerial car a mini

            he’ll never fit in that and will have to wobble everywhere


      • 159
        Some things should never be privatised says:

        What fucking transport,its a joke.nationalise it and let the local councils run it again,it worked great for over 30 years.All we have now are fucking Aviva and Stagecoach on local and national express on well national. The cities were vibrant and the local economy booms if people have a criss cross way around town.These two Hunt companys just set a price together that is way over the top and leaves most buses empty all day.


    • 148
      Wheatchief says:

      Spending go’s up under every government.


  39. 141
    Magnolia says:

    What’s missing is the confidence. The Prime Minister just micromanages the media narrative. He just lectures and hectors to taste. I just don’t get the feeling that he’s batting for Britain with every fibre of his body. The treasury and BOE are just pinching pensions and robbing savers to pay for all the mess and that just won’t fire up the determination of people to go out and make something of themselves to drag us all up into prosperity.


    • 146
      Hier to Blair says:

      Because he’s Blair’s mini-me. His heart and soul is public relations just like Blair.


    • 150
      Wheatchief says:

      You just put into words what I have been feeling all day. He is starting to look like a mini Blair but with a large dose of Tim, nice but dim.


    • 168
      Herr Comrade Herman von Rumpy Pumpy, zer Kommandant der EUSSR, unt zer Master of zer UK arschlochen says:

      Heil! das schwanzlutscheren der GB!

      Unt lay off der CamerTwat. He ist meinen – how you say? – toad stool pigeon.

      Here ist einen queschun: Vy do zer Britischer svinenhunden make mit der whining?

      Anza : becoz vee hav not yet subdued zer questioning.

      But vee hav zer zozialist stoopid drug to put in zer vater.





  40. 149
    QWERTY says:

    The BBC are too busy shagging each other up the arse in the TV centre Transgender bogs to worry about the facts.


    • 156
      Bob Crow says:

      The facts are, that you, me, and every other poor sucker, apart from MP’s, Banksters and all those corporate bloodsuckers that have conspired to sell working Britons down the toilet of the NWO elite, are going to have to pick up the tab.
      And they call me a destroyer of lives.


    • 195
      Mzter Clare Balding says:

      Transgender fags don’t have arses. They shit thru the hole where their cocks was and their arses wear murkins, and are called cu-nts. It’s all in the BBC handbook.

      You need to brush up on your fucking PC lingo regarding trannies and faggots.


  41. 160
    Fuck you all I'm off! says:

    Well I’m not paying extra taxes to service the national debt for the rest of my life and have shit public services to show for it all. I’m emigrating to NZ next year so fuck ‘em, I didn’t create it, never played the housing game or ever been bankrupt!


    • 174
      Those that didn't vote LibLabCon says:

      I presume you’re reasonably young, talented and an asset to any nation.
      Unlike Britain where we welcome the assets as well as the richards other lands are glad to be shot of.
      Go for it Son, it may well be your last chance to escape the hell that us that are stuck here face.


      • 179
        Folkie says:

        I’m staying and they are getting fuck all,I;m going pikey


        • 184
          British political farce. Don'tcha just love it? says:

          I’m pretty sure you can get a grant for that, and a dedicated liason officer from the EU’s cultural commission.


      • 240
        AbleTheSpaceMonkey says:

        the richards other lands are glad to be shot of Very few Richards, far more Hassans & Ahmeds.


        • 307
          Steves' mum says:

          People from Bradford Leeds etc., are constantly telling me that when our ethnic enrichments appear at the door to buy a house they always want to pay with a carrier bag containing actual folding money. If the buyer wont play ball they find someone who will. Could it possibly be that if this is repeated thro the country that this is where some of the missing squillions is?


  42. 182
    Alien Fleet says:

    Abort invasion this planet is full of contagious diseased,all life on it will be dead in 75 years.


  43. 186
    • 188
      Cross Party Consensus says:

      We’ll believe it when we see it.
      If the next government ever bring the previous arseholes to book, who will ever want to join the best club in London?


    • 189
      BA Bookings says:

      A single to Valparaiso.Yes Lord Hutton your flight leaves at midnight tonight,what,you will not be taking any luggage.


  44. 187
    Delores Shayler says:

    Do you think “they” got me, or was i just a typical example of the lunatics hired to run the asylum?


  45. 194
    Christy says:

    We are up shit creek without a paddle and the canoe is drifting aimlessly in an economic mess.
    Too many people indigenous or otherwise are sponging off the state/taxpayers,our productive capacity is frankly shite and shows no signs of picking up.
    We are subject to EUSSR control which is growing steadily year by year and will not abate until they have complete control or the ediface collapses.
    Essential services have been sold off to the highest bidder,which is a national disgrace for a sovereign country.
    Politicians of all ilks have sold this country down the river as regards representing the people and THEIR wishes.
    We are now looking at a very uncertain future for this country Britain.


  46. 198
    T.B£iar - the People's Messiah says:

    I hope that the Taxpayer-funded security guards will prevent his ghost from spoiling my book signing next month…….


    • 201
      Will of the minority shakes says:

      Never mind ghosts. The bounty put up by the arrestblair group may make him reconsider ever showing his bloodstained arse in public again.


      • 203
        Bounty Hunter says:

        One quarter,sounds like they are out for a big profit.why not all of it?


        • 204
          Max "i'm here for you" Clifford says:

          When you add on the media interviews afterwards, plus the appearances on the breakfast sofa, not to mention celebrity big brother, get me out of the jungle and a legover with Katie Price, what’s there to lose?


        • 205
          Max "i'm here for you" Cl*fford says:

          When you add on the media interviews afterwards, plus the app*arances on the breakfast sofa, not to mention cel*brity b*g br*ther, get me out of the j*ngle and a leg*ver with K*tie Pr*ce, what’s there to lose?


          • In off the far post says:

            Yea! A small victory for free speech over the threat of the legal profession.
            First thing is, hang all the lawyers.


          • Police Corps says:

            there is a way of arresting him.first set up a company called POLICEaid.Incorporate it.using company acts create a type of officer warrant card.Have POLICEaid uniforms made.Print out a warrant. Turn up at the book signing in your marked POLICEaid cars with uniformed and non uniformed men and carry out the arrest the same way the cops would.His security are shown the warrant while he is quickly bundled off.Job done.By the time the confusion is sorted he’s away.No laws will have been broken providing he is taken straight to the nearest police station


  47. 219
    Lord Carrington's Binoculars says:

    Er, I don’t get this.

    If we adjust today’s spending for the expected growth over five years, what is the planned 2015 spending in relation to today’s spending? The same? Or rather less?

    And if they aren’t make any cuts in cash terms, how will the UK overdraft (as opposed to our mortgage) be cut back from £160bn to £20bn?


  48. 223
    albacore says:

    From the Conservative Party’s website, 3 August 2010 :
    “The driving purpose of the coalition government”
    “our government’s purpose is to make two major shifts in our political and national life:
    The first is a radical redistribution of power from government to communities and people
    ….It animates our plans for genuine localism”
    “The second fundamental change is that this government, unlike previous governments, will govern for the long term.”
    Wonder if that new buzz word “localism” will catch on.
    It sounds better than yokelisation or, as the EU Fourth Reich would have it, regionalisation.
    Hands up everyone who believes that this or any Lib/Lab/Con government will pursue radical economic policies in the interests of this nation rather than of those of Brussels.


  49. 225
    Schrödinger's cat says:

    Anyone seen OH recently?


  50. 226
    anonymous says:

    when is a quango not a quango?

    when it’s a commission

    yet another unelected ‘tsar’ for the people

    what sort of fucking chacainery is this??????


  51. 228
    anonymous says:

    ……….and while I’m at it, so much for freedom of speech as yet another sportsman gets an injunction to stop the press reporting a story


  52. 233
    WE ARE RICH says:

    Any cuts don’t mean a thing to us because WE ARE RICH


  53. 244
    Mike Newland says:

    Nutshell per the Office for Budget Responsibility figures.

    Expenditure up over five years by £60bn to £760bn unadjusted for inflation.

    But this is eaten up by increases in social security expenditure (you’ve more or less got to increase in line with inflation) and higher interest charges due to a near doubling of the national debt by 2015.

    This leaves departmental spending (NHS, defence education etc) flat at around £340 bn. Since inflation will likely be around 15% over the five years this is a real cut of 15%. Allow inflation protection for some things say NHS, and it means far bigger than 15% cuts in other departments.

    End result in 2015. Further Government borrowing halted but by now up to about 70% of GDP at £1300 bn. Interest £65 bn a year.

    Jobs up a miserable 1.3 m (how many left for UK workers after foreign workers have filled many). Abandon hope all ye who enter the Job Centre.

    Now imagine the cuts to actually bring down the debt or even keep it stable by 2015! It’s a nightmare.


  54. 251
    Mr Politically Incorrect says:

    Morning windowlickers and anonymongs. Is Brown still a c’unting mentalist or has he got even more contemptible in the last 24 hours? I wager he becomes more loathsome with each passing second.


    • 306
      Nursie says:

      After a troubled night he’s on his favourite rocking horse and re-enacting the Battle Of Stirling. He’s stuck plastic straws in the ground to break the cavalry charge and made the speech “You can take our second homes and our brothers’ cleaning payments but you will never take our FREEDOM”.

      We’ve had to stop his favourite bit where the male nurses moon at Longshank’s forces as the care assistant refuses to keep cleaning the saddle.

      He’s not our favourite patient and some of us would like to re-enact the last 10 mins of the film……..


  55. 253
    Gordon Brown says:

    I feel pretty! Oh so pretty! I feel pretty and witty and bright!


  56. 255
    Schrödinger's cat says:

    Well! Mrs Fawkes must be really blessed this morning. ;-)


  57. 256
  58. 261
    Bryony Gordon says:

    Suck my baps.


  59. 262
    Neil "Boyo" Kinnochio says:

    My son is alright! He’s alright! He’s alright!


  60. 268
    Mr Politically Incorrect says:

    Just saw on the news that Alan Milburn is joining the coalition in be advisory capacity. Er…why? Milburn’s not the worst in New Labour but he’s still New Labour. Can’t he go away and be a cab for hire like Byers?


    • 270
      Penny Farthing says:

      He was the original black cab,as minister for health he oversaw the dwp computerised medicals given to a firm he was paid adviser too and pfi contracts given too a firm he then went on to advise…. the firms in question Schlumbergersema(now atos origin) and bridgepoint capital….

      A typical blairite capitalist….. he must have something jucy on dave and crew for this appointment to be made…they will be giving mandelson a job next.


  61. 271
    Gone Fuckin mental says:

    Fuck sake , I dont pay my fuckin taxes to pay for a divearsty officer for paper clips , sort it out Dave !


  62. 274
    Reality calling Guido & Redwood says:

    Absolute bollocks Guido, Redwood is using Vulcan economics by the look of it. One example, Local Authorities are being told you ARE going to get less than the previous year, thats “less than” as opposed to “more than or the same”. If the government are not proposing spending less than the previous year then its because they are spending the money elsewhere, but its not on front line services. So cuts are/will happen.

    Next ridiculous thing Redwood will be telling us is that Blair would make a good peace envoy for the middle east……!!!!!


  63. 277
    Mr Politically Incorrect says:

    Michael Howard is calling for in inquest into Kelly. This is getting tasty. If someone as senior as Howard is calling for it, maybe he has inside info. Maybe B Liar will end up having to cancel that Waterstones signing and seek asylum in Libya.


  64. 278
    Mr Politically Incorrect says:

    Andy Burnt Ham on Sky urging Milburn not to join coalition as adviser because “it would give legitimacy to the government”! What a twat!


  65. 286
    • 290
      Courtnose says:

      we need a Betty whats her face to attend these court hearings so we know who’s who and can later post it on the blogs,in the meantime a search of the international papers and sites will find it in a day or two.


    • 293
      Anonymous says:

      It’s either Ashley Cole or John Terry.


  66. 295
    Gone Fuckin mental says:

    ““The celebrations this year will involve people giving thanks to God for Brother Al Megrahi’s release, and marking the event with their own quiet celebrations. People will pray for Al Megrahi and give thanks to those who helped free him, including former Prime Minister Gordon Brown and Scottish Justice Minister Kenny MacAskill.”



  67. 296
    Gordon Brown says:

    As a reward for being a good boy, mummy is going to give me a slice of choccie cake with my lunch!


  68. 297
  69. 299
    Guido Fawkes Press officer says:

    Guido is more popular than God !


  70. 302
    Coming here soon. says:

    Theres a new post but everyone seems to be staying on this one so I re post this here


  71. 308
    hey up says:

    Coalition seeks changes to Scots Parliament rules


  72. 310
    Jonty Pryor says:

    If Alan Milburn is the answer I shudder to think of the question…..


    • 313
      jock spastic watch says:

      I shudder to think that they’ve let you out of the secure unit, you ginger munter.


  73. 311
    David Laws says:

    I like playing chess in the park with all the gays. Trouble is they all want to be the queen


    • 324
      arzes says:

      “Check Mate!”
      “Oh Yeah. My cock is hanging out of my pants again.”

      “Cheque Mate!”
      “No Ducky. I only take cash.”

      “What nationality are you Ducky?”
      “Chec Mate!”
      “Suck this!”

      Chess and fagging is not good comedy fodder.


      • 329
        window lickers anon says:

        You’ve just sabotaged hours of fun for the rest of us, spoilsport.


        • 359
          arzes says:

          There’s more:

          Bishop takes queen (up the arse)
          Knight takes pawn (up the arse)
          Pawn (rent boy) is queened
          Check mate!
          That’ll do nicely – you spoil us Mr Ambassador.

          The quality suffers but you can spin it out. Have a go ………. if you think …….


    • 336
      P. Doff says:

      Ah yes… bishops and pawn… always make a good combination of moves.


    • 347
      Simon Hughes says:

      I just love to stick oversized chess pieces up my arse when no ones looking!
      I do find the knight in particular quite a challenge, but there again I never look a gift horse in the mouth.


  74. 312
    Gone Fuckin mental says:


  75. 315
    cuпt watch says:

    Poor little Piesry Wiersy is still in denial about the election result.

    “Within seconds, we were debating, at his instigation, the merits of the Conservative/Liberal alliance currently running our country.

    ‘How did that happen?’ he asked, as puzzled as I am by the most ludicrous pact in modern politics.

    Now, no offence to Ashley, but I doubt he even knows how to write an ‘X’ when you vote.”

    Read more:


  76. 316
    Vandriver says:

    Guido, I used to think that this site was interesting and informative. Now I realise that it has been hijacked by people who only have four letters left on their keyboard.

    If the government, regardless of political persuasion, pursues policies which are likely to be detrimental to the running of the economy, then the markets will take us to the cleaners and we will all have to emigrate. Having promised cuts, the government will – indeed must – deliver cuts. Spending must be reduced.

    The whole thing is very very simple. You can spend more than you earn for a while. Countries can do it for a long time. But there always comes a time when the bills have to be paid.

    We have reached that time.


  77. 319
  78. 320
    Anonymous says:

    And in other news desparate ConDems engage Blunkett and Milburn to show them how to make the worse-than-useless liblabcon ruling class even more hated and despised by everyone else.


    • 325
      Kamikaze coalition says:

      Is Dave a fucking idiot or more of a lunatic than Brown? Why the fuck would he employ Blunkett ,of all the labour twats he has to be primary twat uno.


    • 326
      Bystander says:

      The French, as in so many matters, say it best, – Plus ca change, plus c’est la meme chose.

      (And they even defy the EuroCrats. Rosbifs do little more than whine.)


  79. 330
    Jonty McPryor says:

    Hey guys, I’m the foxy dude on the far right in the photo. Leave a message for me and perhaps we could meet for cocktails, or just plain old cock. LMFAO!!!


  80. 331
    Gordon Brown says:

    I love me.


  81. 335
    Troffer Faced Dave says:

    Daves a bit fat


  82. 342
    Crabby Spastic says:

    Councils pay for prostitutes for the disabled
    what do you mean I can’t have that Kate Moss sent round.


  83. 343
    • 354
      insane explanation says:

      so we’re to believe he suffered a heart attack luckily just at the exact same time as he failed to cut his wrists and supposedly stuffed all those pills inside himself ?

      fuckin ‘ell!!! who writes this shit ???

      it’s Blair and the government who are wearing tin foil hats now if they expect anyone to fall for that ludicrous rubbish

      looks like call me Dave is going to keep covering it up


      • 368
        Desperate defence says:

        Its like the excuse the dumb kid comes up with.


      • 373
        Anonymous says:

        “so we’re to believe he suffered a heart attack luckily just at the exact same time as he failed to cut his wrists and supposedly stuffed all those pills inside himself ?”

        No, you’re supposed to believe he had a heart attack because he stuffed all those pills inside himself. Keep up.


  84. 345
    Abdul Bassett Hound al-Megacunti says:

    Ha ha. I wins!


  85. 346
    Gordon Brown says:



  86. 348
    Alan Milburn Of slime Ball hall says:

    Up yours Gordon I’m ok


  87. 351
    Shocking says:

    This is a fucking disgrace. Ban it.


  88. 355
    Evidence: Ten reasons to query the suicide verdict says:

    1. An elbow injury had left David Kelly’s right arm too weak to cut his wrist.

    2. He had “difficulty swallowing pills” so he couldn’t have swallowed 29 tablets.

    3. Medical records about the case have been classified for 70 years, implying there’s something to hide.

    4. There were no fingerprints on the pruning knife used to cut his wrist.

    5. He anticipated his own death, predicting he would “probably be found dead in the woods” if Iraq was invaded.

    6. Doctors doubt the severed artery would have caused enough blood loss for him to have died of a haemorrhage.

    7. The detective who found his body, Constable Graham Coe, said there wasn’t much blood, so how could he have died of blood loss after slitting his wrist?

    8. Two paramedics at the scene were sceptical the “wrist wound we saw” could have caused his death.

    9. There was no evidence he was depressed; he was looking forward to his daughter’s wedding.

    10. His death certificate was not signed by a doctor or coroner and does not state a place of death.


  89. 365
    Thuggie Wet Fart Whelan says:

    Support the strikers at Labour HG

    Sack Mad Hattie the Boss of unequal rights…


  90. 374
    DisgustedOfMitcham2 says:

    It’s not just adjustments for inflation that matter. The total figures for public spending include both welfare payments and interest payments. Both of those are expected to rise significantly over the period, leaving less money to spend on productive things.

    So even if expenditure remains flat in real terms, that doesn’t mean there won’t be big cuts to some departmental budgets.


  91. 375

    on and on and on it goes!


Tip off Guido
Web Guido's Archives

Subscribe me to:


AddThis Feed Button

Guido Reads

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,646 other followers