July 30th, 2010

Shock: Balls Breaks Promise

In some shocking news, Ed Balls has said one thing and done another. As Guido reported earlier in the week, Balls made a bit of a blunder by promising to pay “interns and volunteers” the national minimum wage, whilst turning a blind eye to the fact that his campaign staffers are, err, unpaid interns and volunteers:

Leaving aside his unpaid brunette bag-carrying Bevanite, Balls has today even had the cheek to advertise on W4MP for unpaid stuff:

Idiocy and hypocrisy is always a toxic mix.

This whole campaign has been an utter write-off for Balls, and now YouGov reckon he will be the first knocked out of the race. If the idea all along was to secure his place as Chancellor, how is coming last going help? Political betting specialists Smarkets are running a book on who will be the humiliated loser..

Looks like it’s going to be a tight run off between Burnham and Balls.


  1. 1
    Charles Flaccidwidger says:

    Useless, sweaty twat. Hope he wins.

  2. 2
    Lincolnshire Squire says:

    Burnham and Balls (deceased)

  3. 3
    Nick B says:

    It’s got to be Balls.. the idiot is a liability to himself and a danger to the country.

    Stupid bag of worthless scum!

  4. 4
    John Cipher says:

    He should concentrate on sorting out his wife’s red complextion.

  5. 5
    Everard P Burgerpenis says:

    Is there anyone out there mad enough to take up this job ?

  6. 6

    What an idiot! Mind you Ed Balls has got a book release to think about…

  7. 7
    Tedium says:

    Farking ‘ell!

    This was boring and fit only for wankers like LabourList the first time you ran it.

    It’s not getting any more interesting the second time around.

  8. 8
    Ed Balls says:

    You fuckin wanker Guido. You’re a total twat. I’m now a changed person and am fuckin calm and right of center. Asshole.

  9. 9
    Andy Burnham says:

    Um, that’ll be my fault. She loves it up the stove pipe.

  10. 10
    Adolphe Militant says:

    We’re fucking rich and you’re fucking poor. HaHaHa. Peasants.


  11. 11
    Expat says:

    Balls is a 5 star wanker – God please help him become labour leader.

  12. 12
    LabourList says:

    Oi – we wouldn’t even run this dross. Guido’s shot his bolt.

  13. 13
    getting balls out says:

    So do they make them all line up on stage while they announce the results? Where do I get tickets?

  14. 14
    Koba says:

    They have had all their serial untruths exposed and have been humiliated at the pols. But still they cannot tell the truth on any issue, they even oppose there own law on AV.

  15. 15
    Koba says:

    Amen to that.

  16. 16
    Slave Labour says:

    Balls is a troughing hoon. I would not feel sorry for his staff, they nick other people’s ideas. So they are not exactly deserving of a wage. Gellard is in it for publicity. Good riddance to the troughing hoons.

  17. 17
    Doc Trough says:

    Just because Kryptonite Smelly is sitting opposite, doesn’t mean you have to get all slippy Freudian on our ass Ted.

  18. 18
    Gone Fuckin mental says:

    nowt new there then

  19. 19
    Adolphe Militant says:

    This is David Miliband:


  20. 20

    His incoherent rambling yesterday on the ‘losers team’ leaders debate showed as much sense.

    There is waste in the public sector..?
    “Well, there is waste in the private sector too. Just go to Headingley and see the people enjoying corporate hospitality.
    “What’s that got to do with public sector waste?
    “Erm…its all just waste. everyone is inefficient..”
    “But this is corporate sponsorship, not food vouchers to people already receiving benefits”
    “Its all waste..”


    He looks and sounds more like Peter from Family guy, every day.

    “I don’t like bees..never got bees.What do they do? Uh huh? Ok.well, I don’t even like honey..or wax.. or why do they live in hives..why not huts? Answer me that…. I like Llamas.”

  21. 21
    Nick2 says:

    To be fair, Balls agreed to sign up to a pledge that “employers must pay interns what they’re worth

    It’s not hypocrisy to do precisely that…

    As far as the Labour leadership race is concerned, I wish there could be a coalition of leaders, a sort of micro politburo. That way voters could treasure all of the distinctive traits that make each candidate so unique!

  22. 22
    the Guy is Fawked says:

    Guido made him his favourite and tried to rally support around him.

    He was doomed from that second on.

  23. 23
    And How much is Balls paying this lot? says:

  24. 24
    Albert Hall says:

    That’s a crying shame, Ed would be ideal as leader, he would ensure liebour stay in opposition for a very long time.

  25. 25
    HJ says:

    So Ed Balls wants volunteers to be paid?

    They they wouldn’t be volunteers, would they. They’d be employees.

    He is so thick.

  26. 26
    Edmund Testicles says:

    I will be pwime minister. And once I am pwime minister, I will close down all newspapers, and take full contwol of all TV and intewnet in owder to maintain stability.

  27. 27
    Die Ann Fat Bott says:

    Riiiiiice aaaand peeeeea!

  28. 28
    Marc Oat An says:

    He’s in the shit now. I should know.

  29. 29
    Edmund Blackadder Balls says:

    I’ve told you all before, we’re playing “Ed Says…”. So I don’t have to do it as well. I need new motivation now the taste of Gordon’s cock has gotten old.

  30. 30
    Manlickscum & Sweaty Balls says:

    Balls & Bevynight. Labour and Champagne Socialism. I am sure Gellard is lapping up all the publicity & the perks she is getting from this. I find it hard to have any sympathy for her or any other hoon who supports Balls.

  31. 31
    Sarah Beard says:

    I’m off to Canterbury for the weekend. Ta-ra.

  32. 32
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’m in Killcuddlies writing 10,000 words a day.

  33. 33

    Ballsdrick! Have you been eating dung again?

  34. 34
    Yvette Cooper-Balls says:

    Ed coming last. That’s a first.

  35. 35
    Gill says:

    Mmm. Lot’s of lovely licking.

  36. 36

    Which word are you writing 10,000 times today?

  37. 37
  38. 38
    Tim Lovejoy says:

    Hi , My names Tim Lovejoy and i am a legend .

  39. 39
    Gone Fuckin mental says:

    Fat tramp

  40. 40
    Sarah Beard says:

    As Samuel L Jackson said in Pulp Fiction, I’m a bad motherfucker. Literally.

  41. 41
    Gordon Brown says:

    Nurse, where is my pampers?

  42. 42
    Adolphe Militant says:

    Prescott was always a tit man.

  43. 43
    The other Beard says:

    I love K’unt I mean Kent

  44. 44
    The Ape Man Commeth says:

    If you belive him, Marx said that ‘All property is theft’.

  45. 45
    Gone Fuckin mental says:

    Ed Balls , The gift that keeps giving

  46. 46
    The place Sarah calls Home says:


  47. 47
    Yarnefromhorsham says:

    Could not happen to a nicer bloke

  48. 48
    Anonymous says:

    .. as will *all* other candidates.

  49. 49

    We’re on our way back! We are the natural party of government!

  50. 50
    Gone Fuckin mental says:


  51. 51
    Tracey Temple, for it is I says:

    John loved mine, especially covered in Pies and gravy

  52. 52
    Adolphe Militant says:

    I revised Marx.”All Milibands are thieves”.It has the benefit of truth.

  53. 53
    Dy Anne Flabby Butt says:

    Ed should have had some nice chickaahn, riiice and peeea. It make me feel ireeee and wanna do da bogle-bogle!

  54. 54
    Grouchy Grammarian says:

    From Balls’ job ad – There will be plenty of opportunities for socializing with our young, fun, diverse team.

    Can you imagine the sheer, gut-wrenching horror of going for a few beers with a group of “diverse” individuals who think Ed Balls is ace? Holy shit, it doesn’t bear thinking about.

  55. 55
    MILIBLAND says:

    This myth that Balls ensures endless years of labour opposition needs addressing.
    The uncharismatic D Miliband is a Jack Straw clone. Who will spend his time in opposition clutching at straw. Feckn useless.

  56. 56
    One of Ms Macauley's sons asks a difficult question says:

    Mummy, how did you and daddy meet?

    When I was handed a tube of anonyspunk at the jizz bank.

  57. 57
    Mr and Mrs 'Satisfied' from essex says:

    Political reasoning says that balls would be the best leader for the current government but the prospect of hearing his crap at the dispatch box really grates

  58. 58
    Andy Burnt Ham says:

    I’ll give Labour a landslide.

  59. 59
    Gordon Brown says:

    Hello, I’m still alive. I could come back.

  60. 60
    Kinnochio says:

    I’d have been a very fine prime minister, boyo. Well alright! Well alright!

  61. 61
    Nick2 says:

    Bill, what channel was the debate on, and if part of another program, which one please?

  62. 62
    Sir William Waad says:

    Cuyah, she gwan like she nice eee!

  63. 63
    Grouchy Grammarian says:

    That wanker with the terrible haircut at back left is priceless. When the video starts, he’s doing a ‘Bobby Ball’ with his braces (yes, he’s wearing braces!) and then does that “nodding dog” schtick that Yvette Cooper always does whenever Harriet Harman is speaking.

  64. 64

    She answered the ad.

    Need a visa? want to stay in the uk? looking for a wealthy husband or are you just willing to get married to help others.?

    Contact Baroness Scotland’s matchmaking service.
    No questions asked. No passports seen.

  65. 65

    Can we can clean up the financial mess and end your wars before you make a triumphant return.
    Shouldn’t take longer than fifty years.

  66. 66
    amongymous says:

    The real beauty is that however unpleasant ballsup is neither Miliband will ever be PM – both have all the gravitas of a 17yr old politics student, both look and talk in completely weird ways, both are tainted by the blair regime (and David by torture) – both will look so childish, immature and ranting away with hyperbolic rage that callmedave despite his obvious faults has nothing to fear from either.

    labour out for a generation – bring on the marxist militwats

  67. 67
    Uncle Arthur says:

    Auntie Hilda has told me to tell you shes not posting to you again ‘cos you’re a dick and you just keep repeating yourself

  68. 68
    rocknrolla says:

    ha ha ha – how will they criticise increasing the inheritance tax threshold when they did this??

    they probably will – both totally shameless – look at david miliband criticising cameron yesterday given miliband’s appalling track record as foreign secretary managing to upset india, the US and russia and leave us open to allegations of torture.

  69. 69
    Ed Balls Slave Labour says:

    Balloons for Balls. Once they have had a good kicking.

  70. 70
    Kered says:

    A bigger shock would be ‘Balls keeps Promise’. I fink itsaloadaballs personally.

  71. 71
    Mugwump says:

    “Natural” as in : rancid – criminal – bare faced liars – incompetent buffoons – self serving arrogant opportunists – as deeply unpleasant a sub species of humanity to be found anywhere on the planet.

  72. 72
    davemcwish says:

    So it’s just Balls and his champagne socialist cheerleader “Bevanite” Ellie then ?

  73. 73
    Jonty Pryor says:

    This is for you Guido, babe

    Gd piece on the importance of our ‘Labour friends of’ groups on @labourlist http://bit.ly/cEX7zi

  74. 74
    anonymous says:

    it would be really nice if Balls took one, short intake of breath and then exploded all over his office wall

  75. 75
    anonymous says:

    have you got the pictures?

  76. 76
    Charles Flaccidwidger says:

    “All Labour politicians are wankers” – Charles Flaccidwidger 2010.

  77. 77
    Everard P Burgerpenis says:

    I thought you were busy writing a book ?

  78. 78
    Penfold says:

    He really does need the help of St Jude, assuming that godless socialists can get that sort of aid…….

    As for any aide, they should be certified for joining that loser’s campaign.

  79. 79
    simon r says:

    What a complete bunch of uttter C**TS

    Can’t we just send them all to bloody North Korea or something and see how they enjoy Socialism then ?

  80. 80
    sarah's turkey baster offsprings says:

    mummy please don’t leave us alone with the scary angry man again !!!

  81. 81
    Gordon says:


    (whilst wanking furiously )

  82. 82
    NotaSheep says:

    That VD show was a classic, there was enough material for 100 stand-up comedians if they weren’t all polishing up their old-Etonian and Brokeback Mountain jokes.

  83. 83
    NotaSheep says:

    5Live yesterday morning. 10-12 I think.

  84. 84
    Grouchy Grammarian says:

    Oh…and “socialising” doesn’t have a ‘z’ in it. Labour-educated morons.

  85. 85
    A Firm Pair Of Breasts says:

    Hopefully Balls is finished in politics.

  86. 86
    Lateral Demigod says:

    Having a name like Balls is just asking to be humiliated – so lets hope he’s not disappointed.

  87. 87
    Kent resident says:

    Google is very informative

  88. 88
    A Fine Pair of Lungs says:

    Guido’s Balls breaking news.

  89. 89
    bird with small brain says:

    I was watching some of it on either BBC news 24 or the Parliament channel – I couldn’t stomach more than five mins so I don’t know how long they stayed with it

  90. 90
    almost but not quite says:

    “All politicians are wankers” – The British Public 2010.

  91. 91
    13 Years that fucked the economy says:

    So what was Balls saying here, that all voluntary work should be paid work ? Voluntary…Paid ???? WTF !!!!

  92. 92
    13 Years that fucked the economy says:

    What if in your opinion the are worth

  93. 93
    13 Years that fucked the economy says:

    ….Fuck All ???

  94. 94
    Four Eyed English Genius says:

    It does too!

  95. 95
    chris says:

    I suppose you could say Ed has made b….up!!

  96. 96

    […] Fantastic work by Intern Aware to get all the candidates thinking about this issue. But has Guido Fawkes caught out Ed Balls breaking the pledge already?  […]

  97. 97

    […] these bloody interns keep bugging me about when they’re going to get paid for all this campaigning. I’m buying most of them off with pints, but for some reason they […]

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