+ + + Gordon Sighted in Westminster + + +
+ + + Developing + + +
UPDATE: According to Robert Halfon MP, Gordon entered the chamber briefly for Defra questions. Jonah’s back…
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The Enemy Within | Max Hastings
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Ed Balls stretches credulity by claiming he isn’t ambitious…
“I would love to be part of Ed’s Labour government but what I do next for me is not an all-consuming passion. I’m more bothered, in a personal sense, about getting to grade 8 piano by the time I’m 50.”
Bill Quango MP says:
Ned Flanders – Clegg
Lisa Simpson – Natalie Bennett
Milhouse – Hilary Benn
Martin Prince – Andy Burnham
Edna Krabappel – Luciana Berger
Crazy Cat Lady – Glenda jackson
Comic book guy – John Prescott
Carl – Chucka
Lenny – Philip Hammond
Willie – Eric joyce
Poochie – Gordon Brown
Reverend Lovejoy – Tony Blair
Hospital?
but, but, but, but, that’s not what we’ve been saying at all
he has to be in a mental hospital or watching football
it must be filthy communist lies
Ay, you’ve got him dancing to your tune Guido!
He only called by to cash a cheque. His credit’s not too good in Kirkcaldy…
You could dance with me ducky but you have to find me first.
It’s not Gordon
He is here apparently……..
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/north_east_orkney_and_shetland/10401345.stm
This wraith Brown managed to travel from Scotland to Westminster and was only seen by one MP,while the whole country and media are looking for him.
He can see!?!?
IT’S A MIRACLE!!
Humiilated into showing his face.
course he was
You idiot Guido! See what your campaign has done now?…
How much more will we have to pay him never to show his face again?
Agree! See what you’ve done Guido? You’ve humiliated him into re-appearing before us. I for one would have been quite glad to have never seen his mendacious gurning ever again.
yes that must surely be it
innit?
SSSSsssssssssssssssssssssssssss…….
it’s a deflating balloon full of shit
Erm…..I know this a bit picky, but if the balloon was full of shit, it wouldn’t deflate. It might leak, though.
Eng…. just what do you think of of all day when you can distinguish the sound of a balloon deflating and leaking sh*t? Just what kind of engineer are you?
A shit engineer, obviously. Someone I knew had a job grading th eturds at a sewage plant. He said it was OK apart from the smell, but some days he felt he was just going through the motions.
The Penguin.
The study and understanding of fluid flow is a very important part of engineering. How air flows over an aircraft wing, how nitric acid flows down a pipe, how milled flour flows in a hopper (or jams up in the hopper – best avoided).
We engineers have to understand these things, or aircraft would fall out of the sky, the hoppers would jam up, and the acid wouldn’t get to where it was wanted.
It would be fair to state that the study of balloons and shit is a niche one; indeed, I know of no research in that line. However, by extrapolation of existing knowledge, the behaviour of a balloon full of gas would be different to the behaviour of a balloon full of lumpy semi-liquid solids.
Pity the poor sod who has to undertake the experimental investigation, though….
indeed… or blow the sh*tty balloon up or allow the contents to excrete during the experiment.
Just what would the name of the niche area of study of sh*te filling balloons be called?
Oatenology?
Is it “economics”?
It could be gassy poo. There would be a similar effect to BP’s gassy oil, a burst of noxious gas followed by an unstoppable surge of filthy liquid.
By the sound of it, you’ve experienced one of those dodgy curries as well……
What if the balloon was full of fermenting diarrhoea? Then it would deflate and leak. I think.
The engineering challenge would then be to develop a safety valve and scrubber system to safely vent and treat the off-gas whist maintaining containment of the solids. Or liquids.
Or perhaps it might just be wiser to move a few hundred yards upwind…
Scrubber System, eh? Ooh er.
That sounds easy enough. Do you think there’s a market for it?
it’s the sound of anal twattery
If there is a pile of steaming shit in the woods and there is no one there to observe it. Does it smell ?
Does he need to be there again to collect more money, then?
Has to go to the fees office to redact his expenses
no – that was mr bean
Actually, it was me!
I have now left the building.
Now that England have got through to the last 16 has Gordon lost interest in the World Cup?
Or he’s on his way to Wimbledon to personally curse, sorry, I mean wish Andy Murray luck…
or it was obvious bullshit on a slow news day that only windowlickers took seriiously
Hope to fuck Jonah doesn’t back balls in the losers leadership bid…
I hope he does.
Labour (Blair/Brown/Balls/Millipedes/Harman/Prescott/Blears/Mandy/Badger et al) betrayed British workers. Any Labour leadership containing any of that bunch is contaminated and will lose the next GE.
British Jobs For British Workers! – almost as good as No More Boom And Bust!
The Penguin.
Good one. Another: “Ethical Foreign Policy”.
“Gordon entered the chamber briefly for Defra questions:”
Was he disorientated and confused as all the ‘opposition’ were on the wrong side of the house?
No, just part of their ongoing pogrom against the rural population !
back at laptop today until I get to go for picnic in the park to meet my newest small nephew visiting from Australia *really excited*
31 minutes ago via web http://twitter.com/SarahBrownUK/status/16917323750
all the way from Australia and she takes him for a crappy picnic in the park, which if in Kirkcaldy, will be about -15 degrees.
@Jodatu @htclaytor GB has already been to HoC, and here again today, but also working hard in his constituency – good to have him there too
30 minutes ago via web in reply to Jodatu
http://twitter.com/SarahBrownUK/status/16917417536
“Working hard in his constituency”?
What? Doing The Sun crossword?
1 across: First letter of the alphabet, 1 letter.
Gordon: “och.. errr.. erm..give me a minute, it’ll come.. erm..”
He really is G’od – he’s all over the ‘kin place like horse shit.
Note: ‘here again’. That and ‘also working hard in his constituency – good to have him there, too’
i.e. ‘his’ constituency is fuck-all to do with her. She’s staying in the South East of England whilst he stays in Scotchland- yet wasn’t she only too keen to be seen working alongside him in strange places like Bolton when he was PM?
By my calculations he’s ‘visited’ her about twice since the elections and then buggered off back north.
Hope he doesn,t start giving his support to the England side!
“Jonah’s back”
Whale oil beef hooked!
proberly submitting his expenses
Like Sin Feign – lots of expenses for not turning up.
Perhaps he’s back to sort this out:
My neighbor pored some down a drain,it looked like that after it rained.
He needs to get his car serviced by a real garage.
Now we want to know ,,were and why?
Appalling turnout from Labour in the Chamber.
It were a chimera.
He’s back at the Bunker nursing his grudges and plotting his revenge and return.
His role model will be Sauron, now where’s that bloody ring………
Forget ring, key to number 10 is my prescioussss! Myyy presciousss key! My Progressive Coalition will bring me my key!
I wonder what Gordon’s interest could be in the Department for the Elimination of Farming and Rural Annihilation? Could he be thinking of putting his experience at leading a flock of sheep to practical use?
He certainly was excellent at ‘shearing’ the nation out of their money.
He certainly fleeced us.
His knowledge of milking (taxpayers and pension-savers, mostly) is legendary.
Cooeee!!
I’m still missing. Catch me if you can boys.
Laws was in the chamber, during the budget statement.
Anyone seen Lady Hermon in the Commons lately?
I won’t be having sex with my wife for the next 6 days. Period.
That is as good a reason as any I suppose.
wondered if anyone talked to the loser ?
Now that he’s heard the pension plans he’s probably wanted to come to work and be re-invigorated
I look forward to presenting the new Queen’s Speech in Parliament and outlining my government’s plans.
NURSE!
MPs are braced for fresh embarrassment today when the latest tranche of their expenses are published.
Itemised claims including accommodation and office running costs from the second and third quarters of 2009-10 are being released by the House of Commons.
The material will be made available on a searchable database, rather than through copies of actual receipts as has previously been the case.
Details of communications allowance spending from 2008-9 are also being published, but the disclosure of incidental expenses from the same period has been delayed due to “technical problems”, according to the Commons authorities
When the going gets tough the tough… claim their expenses
o/T are there any polls out after the budget?
42%
http://www2.politicalbetting.com/
Yes. Realising that their benefits are being cut, a few have gone back to Warsaw.
Look in the seen elsewhere column at the top of the page.
Thanks all
He has not visited me in Rochdale either!
It was the right thing to do.
Shut the fuck up you bigot!
The Penguin.
errr, that would be ‘neither’ akshulleh.
Mrs Duffy – so has he ‘visited’ you anywhere else?
Love the pic Guido.
“This content does not appear to be working”
Applies perfectly to McSnotty .
thought itwas only me that got . phew
I love the Queen
Thank you!
x x
Just goes to show that Brown cannot face responsibility, rather than turn up for The Emergency Budget, when the public, and his constituents expected him to be there as Boy George lays into Labour’s hopeless economic policy of squander and spend on the never never, he turns up for something minor.
Perhaps the Hunt has gone off to wish Andy Murray good luck in his straight set defeat at Wimbledon today.
But has anyone got film evidence of him turning up today, or is this another little white lie, just like his claim to be jogging three miles a day.
Minor,tractor stats to Gordon are important
Good one.
Photo agents will pay good money for post election pics of Gordon.
You have to admit,he was a great Prime Minister.He left his mark on the Country and his legacy will last for decades.
Run out of indelible black marker pens again.
Gordon was my financial guru.
I always thought this blog was influential but I’m shocked it’s THIS influential. When it manages to shame a former prime minister into appearing, that says something.
Mr Speaker, this morning I had meetings with my egg soldiers. In addition to my duties in this house, I shall be having a lie down this afternoon.
Come now Gordon, time to get back on the ‘special bus’ – now wrap these sleeves behind your back while I up fasten the buckles.
Good laddie, now does my brave leader who saved the world want a snot flavoured ice cream…?
Don’t worry boys. I’m hiding so you can spend all your time looking for me now.
Now that the Great Scotch McBustard has been sighted I am looking forward with much anticipation to the glorious twelfth.
Would that be the twelfth lamp post on the left?
You’re a bit obsessed Guido. Leave the poor guy alone and move on.
The utter excrement that is Gordon Brown.
He should be hanged drawn and then quartered for his crimes.
Police have to-day denied that they are seeking a stocky glowering individual with greying hair and one eye seen muttering in broad Scots to himself in the vicinity of Portcullis House.
Members of Parliament,Media and Public have however been warned not to approach this individual but to advise the nearest police officer immediately if sighted
A spokesperson for the Metropolitan Police for “operational reasons”refused to be drawn on allegations that the individual is wanted in connection with impersonating a MP. Downing Street has apparently been placed in “lockdown” mode as a precaution as the individual is believed to be last heard muttering…”I AM the Prime Minister !” and was last seen trying to get into a government Jaguar parked outside Queen Anne’s Gate before running off when challenged
1ooth
Browns not in Westminster, he’s here in Hampshire helping me put up a fence. it’s cash in hand so it won’t appear on his expenses. nod, nod, wink, wink
Its being a c/unt that gets me up in the morning.
What are the odds that he will be resurrected as a born again something or other, and ask forgiveness for his past and extensive crimes against the British and especially English people?
Its coming home
Its coming home
Its coming home
Jonah’s coming home
Halfon-doe for quick promotion if Cameron has any sence.