May 9th, 2010

Latest Speculation

The Speccie’s Fraser Nelson says the deal is on it just has to be sold to the Tory parliamentary party, half of whom are freshly minted, and the rank and file.

A deal looks likely to be agreed by Clegg and Cameron tomorrow morning, put to backbench MPs in the afternoon and then Brown will advise the Queen to send for Cameron on Tuesday.

Newsnight’s Paul Mason, who is as plugged into the Labour Party as Fraser is to the Conservatives, says the lights are going out and many want to “go gracefully into opposition and do it soon”. On the leadership issue

if the David Miliband camp and the Jon Cruddas camp were to get together it would make David Miliband hard to stop… This is being mooted but is not a done deal. Since Harriet Harman has ruled herself out of seeking the leadership [Has she really? Guido] I can see Ed Miliband emerging as a candidate backed by parts of the union movement (eg the GMB) who don’t want an alliance with David Miliband. Ed Balls would be backed to the hilt by the existing party machine, Unite and to an extent the “old Labour” left; also the Scottish Party.

The Labour NEC meets on Tuesday and Labour officials are in a rolling meeting schedule until then to decide how to respond if the party goes into opposition. One told me to expect civil war between the Brown “machine” and all those hitherto excluded from it, from the moment the PM leaves office.

Labour is heading for irrelevance…


  1. 1
    Number 10's cat says:

    We can but hope

    • 20
      St George Hawks & Spits says:

      Exactly, a Conservative alliance with LibDem makes no sense whatsoever.

      They will both regret it, sooner rather than later.

      • 27

        Actually, we’ve been without government for four days and seem to be doing all right. No new laws have been passed and no government advisers have been found dead

        I say let it run as it is. who needs them?

        • 32
          EU Fiscal Ministers with a hand in your pocket says:

          The Greeks?

          • Wavy Davy prepares to stamp his feet says:

            I’m picking up a lot of anger among some Conservatives who fear that Dave is about to sell out to Nick Clegg when he doesn’t need to.

          • Engineer says:

            Since nobody outside the negotiating teams and Cabinet Office civil servants know what the deal is yet, what precisely is there to get angry about?

          • Watch the fun unfold says:

            The Tory whips are working the phones to rally support for the idea of a formal deal with the Lib Dems.

          • Engineer says:

            That’s what whips are supposed to do – and presumably, inform the MPs what the deal is, and assess support or objections.

          • Doh! says:

            Since nobody outside the negotiating teams and Cabinet Office civil servants know what the deal is yet, inform the MPs what the deal is, and assess support or objections, what precisely is there to get angry about?

          • Engineer says:

            What planet are you on?

          • Doh! says:

            The planet where I didn’t make a cun’t of myself by talking shit like you did and tried to hurriedly do a U-Turn to cover up your embarrassment

          • David Cameron says:

            I agree with Nick!

          • why the goverment will come for the bloggers says:

          • behind closed doors - what really happend several days ago says:

            Dave, clegg and Brown callt their bilderberg handlers and ask them for the best mothod to finish the destruction of the country.

            Bilderbergers say, what every you do don’t give the people real PR like in Isreal, the people of Britain must have a rigged system to make sure only you three who offer no alternative backed by the media can have power, well assumed power so we can continue to control you and our international loanshark business.

            come up with some crap like a cut off point of 15% whatever it takes to keep UKIP out, so we can continue to build our EUSSR police state and tax everyone into poverty while we own then through our usery debt you three stooges with our media helped us to set up!

            So remember puppets, to keep real democracy from the people, you have to force them to have a high cutoff point, massive deposits, a multiplyer like the EUSSR d hondt system that crushes the smaller parties that we use to select the pointless EU pigs that keeps them on our side and not the people.

            now off you run stooges and destroy that democracy and that country, rigg the votes, use the well know corrupt postal votes, close the polling stations early, replace the voters with immigrants, change the boarders, stop the soldier from having a vote – RIG RIG RIG!


            and don’t forget if you don’t we will get our press to destroy you, pull any retirment plans you may have had in the EU, or on corporate boards and fake charoties.

            Get out their and destroy those bastards, we are not happy with our trillions in personal wealth we want it all!

          • Tin Foil Hat Watch says:


          • Greece today Britain tomorrow - here is how says:

            Greg Palast: “Remove the Bloodsuckers”

            The solution to the Greek crisis, and the global debt crisis, is simple according to investigative reporter Greg Palast. In his 2001 article called “The Globalizer Who Came In From the Cold,” Palast suggests that we should “remove the bloodsuckers,” who are the global financial wizards that work at the IMF, WTO and the World Bank and practice the art of dark finance. Palast details the step-by-step plan of how these transnational economic parasites bring entire nations to ruin, which he learned after he gained a hold of some precious World Bank documents that laid out the banksters’ game-plan of how to harness the financial will of sovereign nations and use it against them. Palast also talked with Joseph Stiglitz, the former Chief Economist of the World Bank and a Nobel prize winner, for the piece.

            IMF, WTO and the World Bank: transnational economic parasites that bring entire nations to ruin.

            Step one, Palast recounts, is ‘Briberization,” and it involves the criminal global financiers paying national leaders of poverty-stricken nations hefty amounts of dough for the direct sale of public assets to oligarchical corporations and private foreign banks. All the illegal dough of the traitorous leaders is then safely stashed in secret Swiss bank accounts, miles and miles away from the nation’s angry citizens whose livelihoods and incomes are stripped in the process.

            Step two is what is referred to as the “Hot Money” cycle by Stiglitz. This is how the cycle works, as described by Palast, “Cash comes in for speculation in real estate and currency, then flees at the first whiff of trouble. A nation’s reserves can drain in days, hours. And when that happens, to seduce speculators into returning a nation’s own capital funds, the IMF demands these nations raise interest rates to 30%, 50% and 80%.” Step two is mainly about hijacking of pension funds, gutting employment benefits, and other social safety nets that people work all their lives for.

            To put it another way, the criminal oligarchic parasites hypnotize a nation to sleep, bend it over, strip it of its clothes, and then rape it. That is the way the secret relationship works behind doors. The transnational banksters are all about economic rape. Rape of public assets, rape of pension funds, rape of electrical and water systems, rape of currencies, rape of everything that secures nations and keeps them alive.

            And when the nation finally wakes up late in the afternoon, it realizes that it was robbed deaf, dumb, and blind the night before. It also discovers that it acquired an economic STD, so the pain has only begun and recovery is far from sight. An even bigger revelation awaits the nation, which will cause panic in the streets, and thrust the nation further into the economic abyss.

            continue reading, you will then understand what is coming


          • You won't get PR you will get a rigged pile of shite says:

        • 38
          Mert says:

          Spot on. I’ll have Felixstowe

          • Cast Iron Cameron lays down his red line! then stumbles over it says:

            Tory MPs have been offered a free vote on a PR referendum

          • Susie says:

            So what? (as that Balls person used to quip).

            They’d vote against it just like half of the Labour Opposition would. This is Clegg’s ‘pas devant les domestiques’, not a lot, but then they only got 23% of the vote.

          • wrong says:

            Labour would slam it through just to do maximum damage to the Tories
            They have a form of PR in their manifesto in case you didn’t notice
            And they clearly don’t fear it as much as the Conservative grassroots and most of their MPs

            Or do you seriously think Labour will play nice and do what you tell them because Dave is in a Lib Dum coalition ?
            About as likely as Tory MPs staying quiet for long if they see Dave bending over for Clegg on PR like this

            This is going to get very amusing very fast

          • Engineer says:

            Let’s wait and see what the deal is before judging it. What have the LibDems given up, for example?

          • Cast Iron Cameron lays down his red line! then stumbles over it says:

            The euro and immigration
            And they were going to dump their positions on them for the next election anyway since they tanked so badly on them
            They get the one thing they really wanted if they get a PR vote

            Was Eric Pickles negotiating by chance ?

          • 13 points on the evolutionary scale and rising says:

            “Lets wait and see what the deal is before judging it”

            What gives you the idea that you get any say in the process?

          • Susie says:

            Do the numbers… it’s a free vote, no whips allowed, in 2012.

            Labour could hardly cobble together a 40 MP rebellion at the best of times. PR would mean at least a third of sitting Labour MPs losing their seats (and second homes, expenses, salaries) so that’s about 86 Labour MPs who will vote against it.

            Take away all the LibDem votes and that gives you about 336 voting against PR (you can be sure Cameron won’t allow a system which favours Labour) with just 254 (assuming +10 SNPs, 15 Others) for it. No chance.

          • wrong says:

            There’s no such thing as a ‘free’ vote unless it’s a secret ballot
            You’re naivite is charming
            Most of those who would lose their seats (and it’s nowhere near a third but nice try) are in scotland, so they would just stand for their own Parliament if they did lose their seats at Westminster
            A price we know Labour would pay since they have a form of PR in their manifesto that would see them lose plenty of seats too

            And who says it will be just be on PR ?
            If it has AV in it then you can definitely wave goodbye to FPTP

            Finally, all the wriggling in the world won’t convince the grassroots and MPs that this isn’t a massive concession to Clegg
            the fireworks that will now follow if he has given them a vote on it will be hilarious

        • 39
          PICK(nose)FORDS REMOVALS says:

          I tend to agree, my Lord. But who the fcuk is going to settle all these unpaid bills ?????

          Can’t just leave them lying around marked ‘It Started in America’, can we ??

        • 49
          AC1 says:

          If laws had a time limit and expired we’d be getting better!

        • 53
          W.W. says:

          Funny I always think that at the end of the summer recess, the country seems to rub along quite well when polititians are doing sod all.


          • filipinomonkey says:

            Well WW many years ago I was interested in how to look after bees. I was taught all the things I had to check and do to the colonies to make sure they produced the most honey.

            Then the lecturer said, “but the hives that do the best will be the ones furthest away that you don’t interfere with and let them get on with it.”

            A lesson there methinks…

        • 71
          johnny says says:

          We still have Ministers. They still have Ministerial fiat to alter statutes at their discretion with the million and one mini enabling clauses they have inserted into Labour legislation.

          • Exterminate Them! says:

            Yes – and now Dave’ll soon have the chance to insert a couple of hundred pages of simple “delete” clauses in one single Statutory Instrument to undo all the damage. What’s sauce for the whatnot is also sauce for the thingy and all done in one morning before elevenses.

        • 93
          Can't remember my moniker says:

          Here here, my lord. (Not a bad uplift considering the undeserved low number of votes – always wanted to be the 17th Earl myself but there is a probelm with the missing 1 to 16.)

          • Can't remember my moniker says:

            This was in response to the disembodied Lord Old Holborn

          • Susie says:

            He’s only following the rules… anyone who misses out on expenses due to circumstances beyond their control (like not actually getting elected) is made a Lord.

            I’m wondering what will become of the Scotchlands and Uddins… mad little bag ladies sleeping rough on College Green telling the policewoman “I’m the Attorney General…”. “Yes dear, but you can’t sleep here…”

          • Can't remember my moniker says:

            It’s a lovely thought, Susie, but it has to be imagined that they has troughed for long enough now that they will be able to live in a style that I could only dream about whilst never lifting a finger again. Sure they will miss the trappings but it will be still be automatic upgrades on flights, free entrance to places and so on and so forth. The only difference between them and TaT will be one of scale.

            I am not complaining. I have just been putting in my own IKEA kitchen here by the Adriatic. I actually bought the units in England and trailed them all the way here. I still saved money on buying them in Germany or Austria. Last year I bought a set of new tyres in the UK for my 4×4. They cost half the price that it did in the UK. (At least I come back and support my country, most people could not be arsed with the effort.) Those things tell you something about the calamitous drop in the value of the pound from which UK folk have been temporarily insulated – so far. But the point: can you imagine Scotchland-Udine-McBroon ever putting in their own kitchens? They wouldn’t know where to start – little people do that.

    • 29
      Lord Guthrie says:

      The new Conservative battleplan.

      • 45

        Tory MPs have been offered a free vote on a PR referendum

        Lots going on behind the scenes. The Tory whips are working the phones to rally support for the idea of a formal deal with the Lib Dems. I’m picking up a lot of anger among some Conservatives who fear that Dave is about to sell out to Nick Clegg when he doesn’t need to.

        • 85
          Double Dip Dave says:

          I will not, repeat NOT, sell this party short in our negotiations with the Lentil Party. You have my cast-iron guarantee on that.

        • 211
          Prag Rag says:

          yes but you’re a tosser

          • Pratt Gag says:

            yes but you’re a shit for brains dog spunker

          • Amalgamated shit for brains dog spunkers (Branch 11, region No 7) says:

            It’s an ‘onest career guv.
            Beats being a politician.

    • 42
      13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

      Anything less than a formal coalition for a full term is suicide.

      Don’t let us down, David.

      • 55
        Cast Iron Cockup says:

        He will, rest assured

        • 67
          Gordon Brown stole my pension says:

          He has before, he will again. Ho hum.

        • 79
          13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

          W|L|D| Player
          0|1|0| Callaghan
          3|0|0| Thatcher
          1|1|0| Major
          3|0|0| Blair
          0|1|0| Brown
          1|0|0| Cameron

          Gordon Brown. Biggest loser for 34 years. Official.

          • Who's sorry now says:

            Says a 28 point lead in the polls and a walkover on the cards if we only play it safe.

          • Looks like Thatcher and Blair go through to the final.
            Major knocked out in the group stages.
            Brown didn’t qualify.

          • 13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

            Gordon’s sorry now, isn’t he?

            (Not that anyone would be so ludicrous as to expect an apology).

            He chickened out of the election he could have won and then chose to be crucified.

            What a fucking loser.

          • Halfway between heaven and earth says:

            The only fucking losers are us who relied on a half witted opposition with a half baked manifesto and a half hearted campaign to rescue us from New Labours living nightmare.

          • 13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

            Sorry. My mistake. Gordon actually won.

            And also everyone is frantically clicking on your fucking stupid youtube clips.

            You twat.

          • Fitter Stoke says:


    • 103
      Martial Law says:

      Martial Law

      • 322
        Henry's Afterthought says:

        Actually, I think it would be a sensible idea to start withdrawing whatever number of troops we still have in Germany, despite the inevitable objections in the MOD (or DOD or whatever they call themselves these days). Although, I suppose this would only be possible if there’s still vacant military housing that hasn’t been allowed to go derelict, or been sold off or otherwise rendered unusable.

    • 178
      No more defeatist b*llocks says:

      Early step:
      Shrink super-size state. Show the meerkats we’re f*cking serious about it.
      There are plenty of others they can attack. Put the Great back into Britain. (Olympic team: GREAT BRITAIN, none of this liddle team GB crap.)

      Show the world we’re not some Socialist super-state dependent populus., or at least we’re putting some f*cking effort into not being it.
      It CAN be undone.

  2. 2
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Run a minority gov. instead, and dare the opposition to oppose the plans to start sorting out the UK’s terrible budget deficit and borrowing. Baring in mind that if they vote it down and call a vote of no confidence, the UK will get slaughtered on the international markets, and nobody will want to buy the UK’s guilts, and the UK Pound would crash… the chav’s on holiday would thank them for it (not).

    Smells like Cameron is trying to do a deal at all costs, instead of telling the Communists (“progressive”) LibDems to go f*ck themselves.

    • 14
      The Tories lost the Election says:

      The Tories lost the Election. Let me say that again, as so many of their media toadies are pretending otherwise. The Tories lost the Election. There’s no way round this.

      In British Elections, you only win if you get a majority in the House of Commons. They couldn’t obtain that majority. Winning 36 per cent of 65 per cent of the electorate (I make that a ‘mandate’ from less than a quarter of the voting public) does not confer a moral right to rule.

      They go on about how they gained a lot of seats. But that is only because they lost so many under John Major (who is now back among us from his 13-year lecture tour, grinning at Mr Cameron’s elbow). How could this failure have happened?
      The Tories had millions of pounds from Lord Ashcroft, poured into every winnable seat. They had the benevolent neutrality of the BBC and the fierce support of the Murdoch Press.

      They were up against the worst British Government of modern times, led by a man so unattractive, unloved and incompetent that a well-briefed Teletubby could have beaten him. Yet still they lost. How could this be?

      • 23
        St George Hawks & Spits says:

        The Tories had . . . the benevolent neutrality of the BBC

        Joke of the day.

        • 63
          lolol says:

          I’m getting sick of turning on the TV and seeing Conservatives laughing and giggling and beaming in joy at how well they’ve done.

          • Can't remember my moniker says:

            Peter Hitchens does not wear his undoubted intelligence with ease.

      • 26
        Anonymous says:

        As everyone with a concious realises, the Tories got the most votes, they won. No matter how New Labour tries to spin it.

        • 52
          Look up the words "Hung Parliament" you ignorant retard says:

          In British Elections, you only win if you get a majority in the House of Commons. They couldn’t obtain that majority

          • Gordon ( SoldGoldAtThe ) BottomBrown says:

          • Anonymous says:

            Simply not accurate, In British Elections we make up the rules on a case by case basis. You win by getting the Monarch to announce you the winner.

          • Gordon Brown stole my pension says:

            They couldn’t obtain that majority

            More specifically, they couldn’t obtain that majority against the worst government in British history.

            Cameron failed to win against Brown, the most hated politician in living memory.

            Cameron finds himself crawling up Nick Clegg’s arse, begging for support. Begging like a dog. Christ on a bike, what would Cameron be like against something less detested than Brown?

          • A 28 point lead against useless cun’t Brown in the worst recession in 70years & Dave still fucked it says:

          • Prag Rag says:

            bollox twat

          • Pratt Gag says:

            piss off you whiny little pussy

        • 83
          Peasant says:

          LOL, it is funny that you Cameroons spin it so much. The fact is that the Tories had polls of over 50% 18 months ago and Cameron pissed it away to a pathetic 37% last week. That is failure. Most of the Tory party do not know what “Big Society” is, and do not trust it and no one was able to sell it on the doorstep. Whose idea was it to launch an entirely new concept a few weeks before the election? Well that would be the campaign manager, one George Osborne, someone who will be demoted in a Lib-Con pact.

          • Anonymous says:

            Yes, a failure in every respect apart from they get to rule.

          • No one had a 50% poll.
            Clegg had 34%
            Did he? Did he
            And Cameron never had 40% neither. Those are polls..fantasy votes. As Labour trolls who never got above 35% said..its the vote that counts.
            100 Labour mps have found that out.

   one won, but clearly one party lost. Quite why the leader of that party thinks he can still hang around is unclear.

          • Franks gone bonkers Bruno says:

            Because to depose a champion you have to beat him. A draw allows him to retain his crown.
            That’s boxing ‘Arry

          • anonymous says:

            Ain’t that a bit like ‘you were 5-0 up half-time and only won 5-2?’

          • Sussex Saltmarsh says:

            ‘Champion’? Surely winning a contest nem con is not the same as being the champion in a contest.

          • Cast Iron Cameron lays down his red line! then stumbles over it says:

            this stupid twat doesn’t even know Dave is currently selling out the grassroots and MPs by giving Clegg everything he wants and may even be giving in to a PR referendum vote

            you seriously think Dave’s got his head stuck up Cleggs arse because he ‘won’ ???

            Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha !

          • anonymous says:

            Altogether now:

            “Non-job, quango, non-job,
            Slash, slash, slash”

            Let’s get this private sector rollin’ chaps. The markets will focus on others if they see we’re REALLY giving this a crack.

          • Susie says:

            Monty CamerClegg Python and the Brown Knight

            “Look you silly bastard, you’ve got no arms left!”
            “Yes i have.”
            “it’s just a flesh wound…”

      • 62
        Anonymous says:

        Apologies to “Pink Floyd” but the words seem to fit even if the names have changed

        “The Fletcher Memorial Home”

        take all your overgrown infants away somewhere
        and build them a home a little place of their own
        the fletcher memorial
        home for incurable tyrants and kings
        and they can appear to themselves every day
        on closed circuit t.v.
        to make sure they’re still real
        it’s the only connection they feel
        “ladies and gentlemen, please welcome
        McGuinness and Adams
        mr. Bin laden and friend mr. Brown and Balls
        mr. Putin and party
        the ghost of Milošević
        the memories of Mugaby
        and now adding colour a group of anonymous southern
        Afghan poppy growing glitterati”
        did they expect us to treat them with any respect
        they can polish their medals and sharpen their
        smiles, and amuse themselves playing games for a while
        boom boom, bang bang, lie down you’re dead
        safe in the permanent gaze of a cold glass eye
        with their favourite toys
        they’ll be good girls and boys
        in the fletcher memorial home for colonial
        wasters of life and limb
        is everyone in?
        are you having a nice time?
        now the final solution can be applied

        • 124
          Matthew Amawillywally says:

          This may, or may not, be relevant but it bears repeating for the sake of politicians of all colours:

          Harmlessly passing your time in the grassland away;
          Only dimly aware of a certain unease in the air.
          You’d better watch out!
          There may be dogs about
          I looked over Jordan, and I’ve seen
          Things are not what they seem.

          That’s what you get for pretending the danger’s not real.
          Meek and obedient you follow the leader
          Down well trodden corridors into the valley of steel.
          What a surprise!
          A look of terminal shock in your eyes.
          Now things are really what they seem.
          No, this is not a bad dream.

          The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want
          He makes me down to lie
          Through pastures green He leadeth me the silent waters by.
          With bright knives He releaseth my soul.
          He maketh me to hang on hooks in high places.
          He converteth me to lamb cutlets,
          For lo, He hath great power, and great hunger.
          When cometh the day we lowly ones,
          Through quiet reflection, and great dedication
          Master the art of Judo,
          Lo, we shall rise up,
          And then we’ll make the bugger’s eyes water.

          Bleating and babbling we fell on his neck with a scream.
          Wave upon wave of demented avengers
          March cheerfully out of obscurity into the dream.

          Have you heard the news?
          The dogs are dead!
          You better stay home
          And do as you’re told.
          Get out of the road if you want to grow old.

      • 70
        Anonymous says:

        “Winning 36 per cent of 65 per cent of the electorate (I make that a ‘mandate’ from less than a quarter of the voting public) does not confer a moral right to rule. ”

        Er what percentage did Liebore have in the last election?

        • 163
          Number 7 says:

          In terms of English seats that 36% results in 298 out of 529. What ZanuLiebore mandate!

      • 72
        Anonymous says:

        Well in the Scottish Parliament referendum in 1997, of an electorate of nigh on 4 million, only 1.75 million voted for it, meaning roughly 2.25 million did not vote for it. We still got lumbered with it, it’s called democracy a la UK.
        I tell you this, if I were English, I would be well miffed at possibly having another 5 years of the buffoon Broon foisted on me, thanks to the tribal votes north of the border.
        We cannot have it both ways in Scotland, all or nothing. We vote for a UK Parliament or we vote for a Scottish one and keep our noses out of Westminster.
        Personally I would rather the Scottish Parliament, which is just a talking shop costing a fortune, would vanish in a puff of smoke and we got back to being British.
        I speak as someone working class, born and bred up a close (tenement building) in Glasgow. Worked for everything I have which is not a lot but I know that I believe in the same principles that the Tories stand for.

        • 118
          Bob says:

          1. I agree that there should be a Scottish Parliament; or

          2. I do not agree that there should be a Scottish Parliament

          1.Agree: 1,775,045 (74.3%) 2.Disagree: 614,400 (25.7%)

          Turnout Total votes cast

          of which 74.3% voted yes

          UK wide General Elections -

          Turnout for the 2010 election was higher than previous years at around 65 per cent, compared to 61.4 per cent in 2005 and 59.4 per cent in 2001, which was an historic low. But this year’s figure is still well below the turnouts of the 1970s, which peaked at 77 per cent.

          • ROFL!! says:

            74% isn’t a mandate

            36% is

          • Anonymous says:

            So three quarters of 60%=45%, less than half of the electorate voted for the Parliament.
            Did Bliar not have just 36% of the vote in his election victory in 2005, oh but that’s ok then cos it’s the Labour party and we all know that they have rigged things to make sure the Tories don’t have a level playing field.
            Nasty, spiteful, vindictive people, none more so than Broon.
            Party of the ordinary person, don’t make me laugh.

      • 76
        Young Mr Grace says:

        How could that be?

        The answer tiny brain is labour bastards fixed the voting system, secured an immigrant voter base, secured an underclass welfare and benefits vote.

        There, did that explain it for you?

        • 92
          Peasant says:

          Cameron pissed away a 50% poll to a pathetic 37%. That is failure whatever way you look at it.

          • Shut up you pathetic New Liebour blog mong (One day I want to grow up to be Mandel-scum) says:

            If 37% is pathetic, what do you consider your boys result then??

          • Dave's pathetic little Poodle is going to SCWEAM AND SCWEAM AND SCWEAM!!!!!!! says:

            Brown’s a cun’t
            you are Dave’s spineless lickspittle poodle
            now fuck off before you embarrass yourself any further you retard

          • droog says:

            Awww diddums, someone’s having a hissy fit ‘cos ave is gonna be PM. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha

          • Yap little Poodle Yap! Now do exactly as Clegg tells you! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!! says:

          • Zed says:

            Bad Loser, mate.
            Live with it.
            You are history.

          • Yap little Poodle Yap! Now do exactly as Clegg tells you! Ha ha ha ha ha ha!! says:

            Dave is a bad loser
            that’s why he has his head stuck up Cleggs arse scrabbling for votes and begging the Lib Dums to save him
            you are all Cleggs little bitches now
            live with it

            you’re just too stupid to realise Brown was a cun’t but Dave is a twat

            looking forward to seeing the mighty Libservatives in action
            guaranteed comedy!
            for about a year or so until it all collapses hilariously


          • Susie says:

            Cameron’s going to be the Prime Minister on Tuesday. Deal with it and move on.

          • Trout pout says:

            He’ll last about as long as a Mayfly.


      • 105
        A Chimp Wearing A Blue Rosette says:

        It’s rather tricky trying to be all things to all primates whilst doing our utmost to ignore those naughty euro-sceptic baboons.

      • 205
        Brownzakunt says:

        Yes and Bananaman the superhero really exists. You deserve to be packed off to Dignitas with Brown and stuffed into the same box you stupid Hunt.

      • 276
        Sir Everard Digby says:

        The fact remains,they got more votes and seats than anyone else – that’s a win by most definitions except yours and your cut and paste reprise from the mail.

        OK,’twas not a majority but they did not ‘lose’ or if they did,what exactlyy did the LibDems and Labour do ? Using this logic everyone lost the election. Absolute nonsense.

    • 17
      Brown Hater says:

      We need the “auditors” in from the IMF to let the electorate now just how bad this mess of Broon’s is. Blame should lie fully with the creator not those who must clear it up!

      The “Churchill” (he was in both parties) alliance ought to Con-Dem the socialists to the dustbin of ideological history with its sisters, facism and communism.

      Advance Britannia, as the great man used to say.

      • 68
        They could shock us and make it work. says:

        After accounts verified, wheel Vince onto the BBC to tell the nation how it is.

      • 164
        Zed says:

        LABOUR failures,
        LABOUR Taxes.
        LABOUR Unemployment and cuts.
        The Tory machine needs to brand this econmic disaster as the LABOUR disaster.
        That’s what it is and we need to ensure the electorate knows you let them in again and they’ll do exaclty what they always do, ruin the country..
        Lest we forget.

      • 319
        Brown Believer says:

        Gordon has survived over the weekend and his position strengthens with each passing day. Meanwhile the Tories and LibDems lose ground by protracted negotiations intend to displace the rightful Prime Minister.

    • 18
      Anonymous says:

      Minority Governments never work, your plan relies upon Politicians being able to apply future planning and realising the consequence of their own stupid actions.

      • 97
        Peasant says:

        …and how long has Salmond been running a minority government in Jock-land?

        • 107
          Jabbb the Cat says:

          Yes, but Scotland is only a country council in a creche without having to deal with the outside world, we deal with the real world for them down here and pay their bills whilst they play pretend…

        • 174
          Zed says:

          SNP Socialists.
          Salmond pleads to keep Brown in power but refuses to have any discussions with Cameron.
          Mr salmond, your country is about to feel the wrath of the Westminster government, and rightly so.
          Too many dullards in Scotland, too many being weaned on the state tit of public sector employment or taxpayer benefits.
          Almost 50 Socialist MPs returned from Scotland.
          As a Scotsman I am ashamed and fearful of the consequence.

          • I like the Scottish but Salmond is just a twat says:

            Hopefully the lib dems will open free smack clinics for drug addicts. We wont hear much from Scotland for a while

          • you can't do shit says:

            with who’s votes ?
            you don’t have a majority remember ?

          • Brownzakunt says:

            I hope Scotland gets fucked. Bigotted bastards the lot.

    • 113
      Ash Cloud says:

      Send the chavs on holiday and leave the rest to me

    • 142
      Sussex Saltmarsh says:

      Indeed, ‘nobody wanted to buy the UK’s guilts’. Hard to imagine there are many left unexpiated, given Gordon’s pathological obsession with making apology for them.

    • 272
      Mark Oaten's Best Friend says:

      Up sh1t creek

      “nobody will want to buy the UK’s guilts”

      “Guilts”????? ………… No, Gilts you moron!

      Another product of LieBore’s “improving standards” & “record exam results”.

  3. 3
    Peter Grimes says:

    And bloody good riddance!

    Let’s hope it is terminal!!

  4. 4
    droog says:

    Milibanana, the chosen one.

  5. 5
    Anonymous says:

    The deal between Nick and Dave was agreed some time ago, (pre-election) this is all pantomime to sell it to the parties.

    • 12
      Anonymous says:

      Watching that second debate I told the wife “theres our coalition”. Two public schoolboys who know Labour has fucked us. I wish them well, and hope they can fix the mess.

      • 116
        Gordon Brown stole my pension says:

        Fix the mess? Clegg, who worked for the EU? And Cameron, who won’t say “boo” to the EU?

        While we, a bankrup’t nation give £45,000,000 every day to the EU? And the EU wants billions more from us, to bail-out a bunch of communists in Greece? And Spain? And Portugal?

        Dream on if you think these tosspots will fix the mess.

        • 229
          Susie says:

          EU? E-schmuuu… no worries.

          Merkel might have lost her majority and with it any hope of the German engine pulling the rest of the EU out of the shit… euro’s in free fall for the foreseeable. They’ll be in no position to thrown their weight around.

          • Green Dave and EU Nick, two peas in a pod says:

            LOL, Darling has just agreed a £10 billion bail out for the Euro zone and we are not even in it! If you imagine that Geen Dave or EU Nick would have done anything other than cave in to the EU as well, think again. They are both servants who know who, the master is.

  6. 6
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Hazel Blears managed to survive with an increased majority. The electorate have no shame in returning someone who took from the taxpayers, money they were not entitled to, and rubbed it in their faces when caught.

    • 13
      Alan Duncan (Future Minister) says:

      Jolly good system isn’t it.

      • 189
        Brown's a Tosser says:

        Don’t blame the system blame the stupid electorate that voted for her. Labour fucking idiots she couyld have shit on all their doorsteps and they would still have voted for her. Jeez what a bunch of wankers.

        • 207
          Low flying lawnmower says:


        • 216
          Brownzakunt says:

          Its always been the same. Labour voters are like slappers hooked on smack and grateful to a providing pimp. No sympathy.

          • Green Dave and EU Nick, two peas in a pod says:

            It appears that it is not just Labour voters who are stupid beyond comprehension. The greedy little tosser Bercow, wes re-elected also.

    • 66
      Alan Duncan's taxpayer funded gardener says:

      Yes. Quite right. Have you seen the state of her bush?

    • 75
      Anonymous says:

      Salford has to be high on the list of constituencies needing to be ‘normalised’.

      • 86
        Young Mr Grace says:

        Apparently a second world 1000 pound UXB just went off in salford and did 200 grands worth of improvements.

        • 222
          Brownzakunt says:

          My girlfriend asked me for a dirty weekend once, booked a B&B in Salford.

      • 121
        They could shock us and make it work. says:

        Not like me to feel sorry for LibDems but some bird in Zac Goldsmith’s constituency got 25000+ and lost.

        • 247
          Susie says:

          Yebbut losing to Zac is better than never to have lost at all.

          I would.

        • 308
          Green Dave and EU Nick, two peas in a pod says:

          Goldsmith exemplifies everything that is wrong with Cameron’s tory party-lite. The stench of it’s hypocrisy and mealy mouthed dishonesty, is sickening.

    • 157
      Shrek says:

      so that is Lord Farquaad’s replacement at Dulac

    • 335
      g1lgam3sh says:

      You’re right…my constituency so I can confirm that analysis.

  7. 7
    john in cheshire says:

    Well, I hope it’s a deal that gets us out of the EU and gets rid of 3 million illegal third world immigrants.

    • 24
      Alan Duncan (Future Minister) says:

      Yeah. The Lib Dems plans for amnesty should solve that problem.

      • 234
        Susie says:

        There’s a lot of open tundra in Scotchland… they can park their vardos up there with nothing but the wind turbines for company. Cleggy happy. Sorted.

        • 313
          Green Dave and EU Nick, two peas in a pod says:

          I think you will find, that nice Nicky Clegg was bullshitting everyone. He knows as well as anyone with a functioning IQ over 50, that his little plan to “redistribute” our unwelcome guests, is contrary to both EU and domestic law and thus unenforcable. Do try to keep up at the back.

    • 64
      Anonymous says:

      Thats racist, everyone knows it should be chavs

      • 81
        Jodhpurs. The choice of hunters and military juntas says:

        The chavs are the ones on horseback. Have you seen those outfits they wear?

  8. 8
    twatwatch says:

    Balls for leader say I!

    They’ll be out of power until Tony Blair becomes Queen err I mean King (miranda ;-)

    • 314
      Green Dave and EU Nick, two peas in a pod says:

      The lying queen Bliar, looks as if he has AID’s. Hopefully.

  9. 9
    W.W. says:

    It may not be the Conservatives who pull the plug on it though, I have always thought that Cleggy selling it to his wacky bunch will be the tricky part.

    Even if it goes through, then the real troubles start, sorting the mess out.

    Still the end is nigh for Brown, then let the blood letting commence.


    • 122
      Anonymous says:

      If the Libs cannot show that they can stand up to the plate and make a proper coalition work, any chance they have of selling the electorate the idea of STV is dead in the water.

      • 253
        Anonymous says:

        Cleggs thinking with a long head just read in the Guardian that Clegg will give until tomorrow night to reach an agreement with Dave.I think we can see Cleggs game-hes scared this period of backroom deals,horsetrading and the exclusion of the electorate from the process, will put them off agreeing in a referendum to PR.Cleggs getting the jitters me thinks.

        • 286
          jgm2 says:

          The time for PR was back in 1997 or 2001. Before Brown had really got going with fucking the economy.

          Still I suppose the fact that a ‘strong’ government like the Labour majorities of 1997, 2001, 2005 has the ability to fuck things up completely just as, in theory, a ‘strong’ government is required to take tough decisions.

          Fuck it. Give Clegg his PR vote. The damage is done now anyway. The UK is fucked and, as Mevyn King so helpfully pointed out, whoever fixes it will be out of power for a generation. At least the Conservatives are minded to fix it whereas Brown will just keep printing money and further Mugabeising the UK until people in town start burning down farmhouses and demanding plots of land. Which he’ll be only too happy to award them with another show of hands.

          We’re all fucked.

          • Mdme Defarge. says:

            This is a problem with FPTP – it produces strong Govts but unfortunately strong Govt does not neccessarily mean good Govt.

    • 172
      Number 7 says:

      LibDem split????????????????

  10. 10
    The last days of Labour says:

    Ed Balls for Labour leader, please. That’ll fuck Labour’s chances of re-election for the next thousand years!

    • 50
      Anonymous says:

      I would vote for him he better looking than camcam the Botox man

    • 102
      Anonymous says:

      Yeah, you have to wonder how much funding for the castration strategy came from sane Labour supporters wanting to boot the odious toad from their party.

  11. 11
    Spin, spin and spin again says:

    Pure conjecture.

  12. 16
    Gordon Brown says:

    I don’t want to leave. Please forgive me. I beg you. I promise not to lie so much. I mean, not to lie at all. I’m a son of a manse. I have good values. Please don’t do this to me. There’s nothing else for me out there. I’ll end up spending the rest of my days a bitter and twisted man. That Macauley woman will get a divorce and she’ll go off with her children. I won’t even have the pretence of a family anymore. I might as well kill myself.

    • 31
      PICK(nose)FORDS REMOVALS says:

      Are you taking all these IOUs with you, Gormless ???

      All these unpaid bills, who’s going to sort them out ??

    • 33
      Brown Hater says:

      It’s time to come out the closet, Gordon or wherever you’re hiding….come out come out wherever you are!!!

    • 51
      Phil says:

      I think I speak for everyone when I say I wish you would top yourself because you have nigh on done the whole fucking country in already you useless moronic spendaholic cnut.

      • 188
        Al Megrahi,s Doctor says:

        He’s going into the Priory next week! (or is that Broadmoor?)

    • 78
      Tony says:

      How are you enjoying being PM Gordon?

    • 151
      Matthew Amawillywally says:

      Please, sir. Don’t do anything rash until we’ve finished building our £10 million BBC “Brown’s Departure Live 2010″ studio and Quentin has sorted out my make-up.

      • 199
        The Amroliwala Rap says:

        It’s Amroliwala with the stiff white collar
        He’s the man you’ve got to foller
        He’s the man, he’s got the views
        He’s the man with the latest news
        Yeahh.. it’s Amroliwala with the stiff white collar….

  13. 19
    I've had enough says:

    Your can do it with B&Q.
    Gove, your country needs you.

  14. 21

    We’re still the government! And we won more votes! We deserve to stay in power for another 5 years!

  15. 22
    Anonymous says:

    Benedict Brogan is so far out of the loop its rather sad. He says David will not compromise of FPTP (when he already has) and that David has not offered the Libs Cabinet Posts (when he already has).

    • 154
      Ewanme says:

      LOL !!!

      Benny’s a twit an I’ve told him so on many occasions .

      Never got no reply , tho .

      E x .

  16. 25
    Election Frolics says:

    So who will you be voting for in the September general election?

  17. 28
    Leaky pipes says:

    Amazing that Balls can be leading the sack race.

  18. 30
    A Firm Pair Of Election Breasts says:

  19. 34
    The Morris Marina a nasty log laid by British Leyland says:

    Anyone else listening to fat Irish shit stabber Stephen Nolan on Radio 5? The fat Irish c u n t is blowing his top that the Lib Dems DARE do a deal with the Tories. He sounds like he’s about to have a heart attack (we can only hope)

    • 87
      Fellow Irish cunt says:

      Would this be the same Steven Nolan who gutted Harriet Harperson?

      • 125
        The Morris Marina a nasty log laid by British Leyland says:

        Wow have you seen Hattie? I fucking retarded mong aged 2 could savage Hattie. nolan is STILL a FAT FUCKING IRISH C U N T who shit stabs liebour.

  20. 35
    Legatus says:

    The tories will go into this coalition, and at sometime within the next 6 months the tories will sabotage it. A new election will be held with the public sufficiently fearful of hung parliaments and the tories will win a majority.

    The libdems will break up ….. again

    Balls will get the nod for labour. Bilderberg boy for the Bilderberg party.

    Austerity will start

    within 3 years there will be riots in the street

    within 5 there will be a labour libdem coalition.

  21. 36
    An optimistic pessamist says:

    Libdems take very little to the negotiating table so Tory boy has the whip hand. However if the Conservatives can keep the wierdy beardies in their box, a coalition could prevent Labour from ever seeing the light of day again. Democratic Conservative party could be the progressive party of the future locking in the majority vote and lock out Labour.

    • 74
      Anonymous says:

      You cant kill them all, cockroaches just keep coming back. We need a global vaccination like smallpox

      • 119
        Potts says:

        cyanide in the special brew will get 99%

        • 240
          Centrist says:

          doesn’t your comments prove your the nasty party? And as Mervyn King says, will be out of government for 30 years, although I’m sure you will try and blame the wierdy beardies, otherwise known as 25% of the electorate.

          • Susie says:

            Revenge will be sweet.

            Doesn’t it occur you that we’re entitled to a spot of sheer unadulterated joy after 13 years of having our intelligence insulted, our pensions robbed, our country ruined by the miserable bunch of chancers formerly known as NuLabour? Before we get to at least 20 years’ of work and austerity repairing the damage.

            Centrist, you are nothing but a hissing in the dark.

          • Green Dave and EU Nick, two peas in a pod says:

            Progressive = third way fascism. Same shit as ZaNu, just different faces.

          • The big D says:

            Your definition of nasty depends upon which side of the divide you are standing.

  22. 37
    johnny says says:

    “Newsnight’s Paul Mason, who is as plugged into the Labour Party as Fraser is to the Conservatives, says the lights are going out and many want to “go gracefully into opposition and do it soon”.”

    If Paul Mason’s comments are true it’s no wonder they would rather be anywhere but in power right now. 13 years of shit is about to hit the fan.

  23. 40
    The Morris Marina a nasty log laid by British Leyland says:

    Paul Mason plugged into Liebour? He’s got his stinking cock shoved up Mandelson’s shit stained arse most of the time

  24. 41
    Mert says:

    That was supposed to be reply to OH

  25. 42
    Will be screaming at the telly in tears... says:

    The sound of champagne corks over England as Gordon leaves…

    • 239
      Susie says:

      Yep! Probably a few more than were at the BBC in 1997 as well.

      I think all Guido Fawkers should congregate for a celebration – in Hyde Park? – I want to breathe the fresh air when I toast McDoom (may he rot in hell).

    • 324
      Mad Hattie says:

      I’ve got mine sitting in the fridge waiting.

  26. 44
    Mert says:

    Site is fucked again.replies not connecting with posts.I’m going to thetreeofliberty

  27. 47
    Scotopian says:

    And to think that The Lib-Dem’s were once an electable political party in Scotland. Will ye no come back again?

    • 185
      Number 7 says:

      Not after the English referendum on rebuilding Hadrian’s Wall

      • 292
        Grumpy Old Man says:

        There’s hundreds of miles of reclaimable razor-wire and concrete wall sections lying about in the middle of Germany. That will get the unemployed off the streets for a few months doing something of worth for the Nation.

  28. 54
    Tessa Jowell says:

    I love Balls in my face.

  29. 56
    Not a member of the NUS says:

    Our ‘Azel Blears for next Labour leader. Just for a laugh.

  30. 57
    nell says:

    Ok I want this labour government , especially gluey gordon and bliar brought to book for taking us into wars on a lie and for not kitting out our troops with body armour, helicopters and armoured four wheeled drives!!

    I also especially want gordon’ Isavedtheworld’brown condemned for his destruction of our economy with his spendspendspend policy and expansion of the welfare state for every 16 year old girl whose aspiration now after this labour government is to have 4 children by the age of 20 (fathers irrelevant) so that she can live on the state; and for every other person who is on welfare to spend their days drawing labour benefits and playing online poker!! This is what labour has done to our society!!!

  31. 58
    Lescromps says:

    What kind of fuck up is this when not one single person, who could be bothered to watch hours and hours of shit,then drag their sorry arses down to some shithole to to put a cross on a piece of paper,and can you believe,yes it is the 21st century not one person got the outcome they voted for I think i;v just been well and truly banged in the arse and I didn;t feel a thing…..

  32. 59
    lolol says:

    3 days and they are still f*ckin talking,they are either in coalition or not,time to start surcharging the 3 political parties .

    • 214
      Brown's a Tosser says:

      If you think this is bad just imagine if we did have PR it can take weeks to get a colaition together. This is not governing its continual negotiation and scratchy backy time. Sorry but for all its faults FPTP is my preference every day of the week and twice on Sundays. Try to imagine three or perhaps even four parties trying to put together a government = total shambles.

      • 241
        Susie says:

        Could be worse, have a look at Germany — they’re now at the mercy of the far left and the Greens and most of Northern Rhine Westphalia’s broke. Oh dear.

        • 320
          Green Dave and EU Nick, two peas in a pod says:

          PR always leaves the majority, dependent on the fringe minority.

  33. 60
    Peasant says:

    Lib-Con pact? Oh good. That will mean that at the next election LibDems will be destroyed since the only anti-Tory option will be Labour and no one will ever vtrust the LibDems again. This agreement is the kiss of death on Clegg’s tawdry party and good riddance to it.

    • 166
      Engineer says:

      Not necessarily.

      If this arrangement works (big if, I accept), then the reputation of both Cons and LibDems will be enhanced. They will have salvaged a working government from an electoral mess, and then addressed some really large national problems.

      The contrast with the other party would not be starker.

      • 242
        Susie says:


        You’d think the LibDems would be quite pleased to have the first shot at government in 34 years on 23% of the vote.

      • 250
        David Cameron says:

        This will be massively popular and the public and our grassroots will love us.
        I give you my Cast Iron Guarantee.

  34. 61
    SadButMadLad says:

    I love to see a Labour Party leadership battle between the two millipeds.

    • 111
      Brown Hater says:

      The latest Marx Brothers comedy?

    • 169
      Engineer says:

      Why not have both as joint leaders? Duty and standby. Buy one, get one free. Most people can’t tell t’other from which, anyway.

      • 192
        The logical song says:

        That’s right. Pay two men to do one person’s job.
        Ever run BL by any chance?

      • 251
        Davnick Cleggeron says:

        Why not have both as joint leaders? Duty and standby. Buy one, get one free. Most people can’t tell t’other from which, anyway.

        Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!

    • 326
      simon r says:

      yeah – make it a duel with axes and televise it

  35. 68
  36. 76
    Jacqui Smith says:

    Gisa job, please.

    • 244
      Susie says:

      Right Jacqui — start with the downstairs lav and make sure you scrub under the rim. Then empty the cat litter, I’ll show you where as it’s your first day, then I think the drawing, dining rooms and bedrooms could do with a good dust and hoover, but don’t touch any of the OH’s porn videos, they got you into rather a lot of trouble didn’t they?

      Ok, that should take you up to 11 – coffee and biccy time. Then I’d like you to do the floors — I use ecover floor soap which is in the scullery — do the corners thoroughly as sometimes the pets do their businesses, sorry but you know what it’s like, you look after them, feed them and trust them and they shit all over you!

      I’m off to see my life-coach Carole and might do a spot of retail therapy — back for lunch about 12:30. Byeeeee!

  37. 82
    Margaret Beckett says:

    Can I be leader, please? I’ve got nowt to do.

  38. 84
    The Prime Minister says:

    Despite speculation to the contrary, I can tell you that even now discussions are taking place between my friend Nick, and the rest of the liberal democrat party. Those discussions, while frank, and sometimes bruising, sometimes blood letting, have always been cordial. By tomorrow morning a deal will have been struck which will see me continuing as your prime monster, with Nick at number 11. The liberal democrat rank and file cannot work with a conservative administration, nor will the conservatives offer to discuss proportional representation which I have placed on the table despite 13 years of oposition to it.

    But I am desperate to stay in downing street and will eat whatever shit I have to, to do so.

    These are uncertain times, but only I can make the big decisions, do the right thing, save the world, and stay on as your great leader. Thank you.

    • 126

      It’s as if he were really here.

      Time to footnote Brown into pub quiz territory.

      Who sold gold for £2 a tonne?
      Who was never elected as Prime Minister despite being one for three years?
      Which Prime Minister tied himself to bannisters at No 10 Downing street and had to be forcibly removed by the SAS?
      Which Prime Minister single handedly destroyed the country formally known as the United Kingdom?
      Which Prime minister appeared as a contestant on American Idol doing haddock impressions…

      • 150
        MAD FRANKIE HADDOCK son of COD says:

        Excuse me i do not want my name mentioned in the same breath as that c*nt !

    • 279
      Your friend Gordon says:

      I agree with Dick.

  39. 89
    Jimmy says:

    “Labour is heading for irrelevance…”

    Given your track record for predictions I find that reassuring. But if we are, do save us a seat.

    It’s about who blinks first on PR. If Clegg bottles it (and assuming he can persuade three quarters of his turkeys to vote for xmas) we’ll drive them back to Cornwall next time out. Normal service will be resumed shortly.

    • 132

      You may wish. But apart from the super intellect Kerry, safe seat, still nearly muffed it, McCarthy I don’t think there is a Labour seat within 500 mile of Truro.
      Its like a reverse Scotland in the West Country.

    • 139
      Engineer says:

      Jimmy, you’ve got a few things to sort out before “next time out”. A credible leader, acceptance and atonement for economic, educational and immigration policy sins, and some serious personnel changes. Might take you a few years.

      Enjoy the leadership bloodlettings. It’s quite clear that even if Brown goes quietly, his bully-boys will be stirring it up for some time to come.

      • 218
        Jimmy says:

        Ah bloodletting and stirring…

        I’ve only heard that from one party so far and it’s not us.

    • 156
      13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

      I think we will be able to find a freshly-returned Labour front bencher willing to do the honours as far as blinking is concerned.

    • 168
      Anonymous says:

      you haven’t heard of our plans for your union funding then? well i won’t spoil the surprise!

  40. 90
    The last days of Labour says:

    Labour, back in opposition where it belongs. Hopefully for good.

  41. 99
    pp says:

    We have 650 duly elected MPs – there is a government in there somewhere it just needs to make itself known.

    F*ck the leaders and parties – the people elected the MPs.

  42. 100
    13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

    After having had three days to think about it, I’ve concluded that Brown’s political humiliation does not even come near to offering closure to the electorate on the last thirteen years of maladroit and wanton destruction.

    It would really be better if Brown were to die.

    • 110
      Great British Public says:

      A very slow painful death in public, please.

      • 120
        13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

        Tied to the ground on Whitehall and then run over from the feet up by a very slow-moving steamroller.

        Corpse left in the street during a seven-day Congestion Charge amnesty.

    • 138

      Nah. I think he should be sent to Europe. He’d like to go there and they’d like to have him. Finance minister for the EU.

      Within five years he will have destroyed that institution as well.

      • 325
        More Tories Please - oh, thank you. says:

        Are we sure Gordoom has not been holidaying in Greece

    • 184
      Gordoom cooks the books says:

      no its nice how he thinks he still has a chance death by 1000 cuts aaaaahhhhhhh sweet

  43. 108
    Desperate Gord says:


  44. 114
    Black Monday says:

    What price a run on the pound and queues outside banks demanding their money by lunchtime tomorrow?

    • 135
      Alyingstare Darling says:

      You’re thinking of Northern Rock.

    • 137
      Mert says:

      I withdrew the max just before midnight and am doing the same in about 15 minutes just in case

      • 258
        Zippy says:

        if you can withdraw the lot in 2 gos don’t worry they always have loose change left

  45. 115
    Article 38 says:

    Jack Droney has to be the new hate figure for me – even though the foul socialists are (probably) out of government there’s no reason to stop victimising the bastards and trying to stop them making a comeback. They’re like frickin zombies.

    • 193
      Zed says:

      Isn’t he the most obnoxious human being you’ve ever seen.
      Almost feel sorry for hattie now.

      • 201
        Poor poor Hattie says:

        Must be like living with ‘The best of Scargill’ on cd blaring out full volume 24/7

      • 213
        Geordie Scoot says:

        I just imagine he’s got a matching giraffe suit like Hattie – that brings him down to size.

      • 328
        More Tories Please - oh, thank you. says:

        I heard him for the first time talking to Paxo. It is amazing how many union bosses are so without humour or basic manners.

        • 337
          Mdme Defarge. says:

          God he was unbeleiveable. What a turd of the highest order. What ever is wrong with the rank and file card carrying trade union member allowing such imbeciles to gain control?

  46. 129
    Rev. John-Paul Ballot Box says:

    On this Sunday night lets us join hands and give thanks for the blessings that this election has brought us.

    -Let us give thanks for UKIP for barking at the moon, helping to re-elect Ed Balls and possibly giving us an even more pro-EU government than we had before.
    -Let us give thanks for Jack Dromey for proving that dinosaurs still roam the Earth.
    -Let us give thanks for the Grauniad for jumping on the Lib Dem bandwagon only to realise they will be supporting a Tory government (D’oh!).
    -Let us give thanks for the lefty dreamers who are talking about a “rainbow progressive alliance” of freaks, geeks and celtic warriors and managing to keep a straight face as we stare down the barrel of economic oblivion.
    -Let us give thanks for the BBC who hosted a gala extravaganza on Thursday night but seemed to forget that there was an election on.
    -Let us give thanks for the trendy students who agreed with Nick but didn’t realise until 9.45pm that their vote on Facebook didn’t count.

    But above all, let us give thanks that we wont have go through all this again for a while (will we?).


    • 134
      Butcher of Smolensk says:

      Don’t worry my friend we can eat the greens first

      • 148

        I love all these Libs now saying that they won’t work in a coalition.

        That’s..erm..that’s proportional representation isn’t it? Working in a coalition.
        How lovely that they thought they would only ever be in a government of socialists, media companies,public sector workers,Greens and communists.

        All the sandalistas who last Wednesday said they were voting for a hung parliament but this Wednesday will be crying into their muesli.

    • 140
      13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

      13eastie will now lead the Gord’s Prayer:


      Our Pariah, which art in Downing Street,
      Hated be thy name.
      Thy government come,
      Our Nation’s wealth go, in 2010 as in the 1970’s.
      Give us this day our daily soundbites
      And forgive us our tirading against those who tyrannise against us
      And lead us not into another term of office,
      But deliver us from evil
      For thine is the catastrophe, the penury and the gloom
      For ever and ever. Amen.*


    • 153
      it's not often I say that says:

      Funny post.

      • 212
        13 points on the evolutionary scale and rising says:

        “it’s not often I say that”

        Only in reply to my own posts.

        • 233
          Prag Rag says:

          slopping out time gayboy

          • it's not often I say that says:

            I meant the Rev John Paul you fucking morons, and if you had looked up the reply column you would have seen that FFS

    • 227
      Geordie Scoot says:

      I should like to thank Nigel Farage for giving us a practical demonstration of the dynamics of the UKIP campaign. I am relieved that he lives to tell the tale but in future he should stick to p*ss-ups and breweries.

  47. 131
    Duck says:

    Fuck I want a revolution and I want it now

  48. 167
  49. 170
    Don says:

    Following extensive talks between Labour and Lib Dems, it has been decided that the forthcoming Olympics will be the first proportional representation games.
    Instead of gold, silver and bronze medals, all competitors will get an award.
    “The odious first past the post system is so unfair because some athletes compete and get nothing,”a Lib Dem spokesman said.

    • 180
      13eastie (How do you like them apples, Gordon?) says:

      The bronze medalist will receive an automatic upgrade to silver, and will then distribute the gold and bronze medals as he sees fit.

    • 187

      So everyone won the election.
      Now you’ve pointed it out it does make sense.

    • 206
      Geordie Scoot says:

      Aye, but on the second length the head sprouted a torso with arms and began to fall behind the rest of the field. By the final length it had grown a complete body with legs and feet but it struggled and finished last. At the end of the race, the coach said “You should have quit while you were a head!”

  50. 175
    Chopper Cameron says:

    Harden up Britain

  51. 179
    Gordoom cooks the books says:

    Jack Dromey where do Liebour find these arseholes he may be the best yet my god he is one dumb mother

    • 249
      moot point says:

      We need a LibCon pact now just to keep that creepy fuck in opposition.

  52. 190
    Lying deceitful bastards . . says:

    . . meet their mirror image.

    Good luck to the rest of us who will have to pay or suffer it all.

    Still, Brhoon will ‘of’ gone. So not all bad.

  53. 196
    Geordie Scoot says:

    So many seem to have the inside track on the election post-mortum. What was apparent to me is that whaty happened is that Labour succeeded in mobilising and putting a floor under its core vote in the final week with its scare tactics. In the North East the situation was not helped by Cameron’s remarks about the public sector being too big in the region – true, but Labour immediately translated that into Tories threaten North East jobs and we had a personal message from Brown that he was fighting not for his job but “your jobs”. There is an expectation in the community here that once again we find ourselves on the wrong side of the economic argument – before we had mining and ship-building, now we have government departments and agencies, plus a huge benefits dependency, so natural self-interest mixed with tribalism took hold. What then happened in that final week was that local surge in support for the Liberals began to disintegrate as the Labour waverers retreated to the fold. In the end in the North East, despite all the publicity favourable to Labour, despite the last minute visit by Brown, despite the tribalism and self-interest, Labour still lost over 9% of the total vote-share relative to 2005 and the Conservatives picked up over 4%, with the Lib Dems virtually static. It was not enough to give the Conservatives a breakthrough, but it meant that for the first time in decades Labour’s share of the vote here has fallen below 50%, to 43.6% and I see that as very significant. In the result in terms of seats, Labour held 25 out of 29, losing 2, one each to the Tories and Lib Dems. Under PR, Labour should have lost 14 seats with 7 each going to the Tories and Lib Dems. Things are changing up here and I believe Labour have futher to fall.

  54. 202
    Zed says:

    I’m all for voting reform.
    What about reform such as:
    1. Having to have a basic understanding of Economics before being allowed to vote.
    2. Having to be able to name at least one policy from each major party’s manifesto before being allowed to vote.

    • 246
      Duncan says:

      The 538 blog is reporting that the polls which showed the greatest bias in favour of the LibDems were those which selected in favour of a) people who left the house and b) people who had access to the internet. Non-computer literate shut-ins vastly prefer the two big parties, it seems.

  55. 204

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha !!

    • 245
      Duncan says:

      The truth is, while the Conservatives regard the Labour party as the enemy, the LibDems feel that way about the Conservatives (and are just confused by the continued existence of Labour) – it seems doubtful that Nick could command the 2/3rd majority of the party the constitution says he needs for anything more than a confidence and supply arrangement for STV.

  56. 221
    Geordie Scoot says:

    FFS, someone with some IT skills do a version of the “Downfall” bunker scene for the last days of Brown in No 10 and make it quick!

    • 261
      Hermit Crab of Downing Street says:

      It deserves one as Brown doesn’t seem to know he’s been well and truly fucked.

  57. 237
    Geordie Scoot says:

    The shredders are in full throttle in Whitehall and smoke billows from the furnaces. A spontaneous chorus arises from the throng massing at the gates of Downing Street: -

    “Please release us, you must go
    For we don’t love you anymore (not that we ever did)
    We have found a new love, dear
    So f*ck off and die, you little queer”

  58. 243
    Gordon Brown says:

    Nick Clegg needs to pick a nokia form his head and I’m just the Comrade to do it.

  59. 262
    St George Snickers says:

    Already got most of that, what’s next ?

  60. 264
    Wm T Sherman says:

    Well boys, we’re watching with interest from over here.

    Our conservative wing is looking to have a significant set of wins in November 2010


    the GOP establishment has a history of (1) pissing away advantages, (2) a timorous fear of false lefty accusations of callousness and racism, (3) imagining that campaigns are all about fund-raising events and not policy, and (4) have been government-expanding spendthrifts themselves for decades.

    I have seen the distinction drawn between electoral success and political success. Electoral success is of course winning the election. Political success is not having your next campaign undermined and sabotaged by the party leadership, being in line for desirable unelected corporate and government positions, and so on.

    The road to real power for conservatives is to listen to their base and run on giving them what they are asking for – smaller government. As things stand, I don’t think they really have it in them. To fix what’s wrong with the country, it is necessary to first hammer the fossilized GOP apparatchiks out of their comfortable positions and replace them with people who haven’t forgotten how to give a damn.

    See any parallels?

  61. 265
    Tapestry says:

    No one on here seems to have spotted Darling sneaking over to Brussels to sign Britain into carrying a 10% share of the $1 trillion Euro bail-out. He’s trying to tie Cameron’s hands, by presenting the deal as fait accompli before he’s sworn in.

    This is pure filth from Labour, and Cameron must not honour this pointless deal done behind the backs of the British people, by a government which no longer exists.

    • 275
      Can't remember my moniker says:

      Did see this and wondered WTF? Did not have time to persue so thanks.

  62. 266
    Mitch says:

    Its about time the Queen pulled the chain and flushed brown and co down the pan of history.
    A pound of lard in No10 couldn’t be any worse so make one PM.


  63. 269
    A Welsh Windbag says:

    A word to the wise, my friend Gord:

    Hold out for a job in Brussels – like me and Mrs Kinnochio – when you’re negotiating your peerage/K with your sucessor Gord. Far more lucrative than Tone’s chosen option and handy to our Celtic homelands for a quick nip backover (on expenses of course) when you feel like a weekend – even all week – at home in Fivio. Far better too, than having to set up all those phony front org’s, ‘Faith Foundations’ etc. to hide the money. And best of all, no having to rub shoulders with the intellectual dwarfs on the talk circuit, and those uncouth ragheads.

    Then when Pete’s managed stab Mrs Ashton in the back and nick her job, we can get von rumpy to show us round the fleshpots.

    • 270
      Can't remember my moniker says:

      And the fleshpots of Brussels come in all colours from pink to very dark brown. Bound to be something there to suit Gordo’s cravings…..

      • 287
        A Welsh Windbag says:

        And I’m hoping Pete will go for my crotchless green knickers – go with the few ginger hairs remaining on my baldy old pate donthchaknow.

  64. 274
    marcus aurelius says:

    So the mooted referendum on PR, will that be before or after the referendum you all promised on the Lisbon Treaty?

    Speaking of the Lisbon Treaty, aren’t you just glad that it means British taxpayers have the priviledge of coughing up to support the Euro? Dave what does your new mate Nick say about it?

  65. 277
    Can't remember my moniker says:

    Nokia sues Apple: Was this related to Nick Clegg’s remark ‘I’m about to have my apple’ rather than David Miliband’s banana?

    We could be in for a rather fruity, even impetuous, coalition. In its youth, this will be an impetuous, deeply fruity parliament which, with ageing, will become more velvety and supple, gaining additional facets. It will be enjoyed with beef, noodles, potatoes and pizza.

    Whether it gets to the dessert stage is too early to forecast. The Nokia will probably be overwhelmed and retire very hurt.

  66. 278
    Rodrigo Borgia says:

    I wouldn’t be so sure that there will be a Con/Lib deal…GmTv were reporting on bulletins this morning that Clegg had a 2 hour meeting with Brown and Mandelson late last night in Westminster.

    Meanwhile as the politicians fiddle the markets burn !!!!

  67. 280
    Postal Vote says:

    Conservatives 16,000 votes short of overall majority while Balls manages to hang on with 1,100 majority: without postal votes the UK would have had a new government by now and Balls would have been kicked out

    Both tories and libdems should seek a change in postal vote procedures prior to next election and referendum on voting reform.

  68. 281
    Minekiller says:

    PR or First Past the Post or whatever…..the result of the GE was nothing short of the proof of Labour’s massive welfare bribery, clientalism, boundary fixing and postal vote rigging to deliver 250+ seats. I’d say given the thirteen years of disaster they handed the UK, this result was superb.

    CMD on the other hand just didn’t have the balls to deliver a decent Conservative manifesto in the national interest, such as a referendum on Europe and a repeal bill. Thus he allowed UKIP to save Labour enough seats to deny him an outright win, overall majority. So now he’s trading with a Dutch-Russian guy and his pro-Euro anti-Trident party. Oops.

    On the other hand, faced with actual responsibility in government the Lib-Dems may actually take the pill and drop the more loony policies. This will be much easier, given they have lost two prize loonies in Opik and Goldsworthy. The Con-Lib coalition may actually allow the electorate a view of Clegg’s party and if they don’t blow it they could easily replace Labour, would may well shrink to no more than a core ‘UNITE’ party. But Cameron and Clegg must realise that they have no future together or apart unless they dismantle the Labour Client State at the BBC, in the teaching profession, in the managerialism of the NHS, in the Civil Service subborned by Blair and Brown and also in the Charity sector which was created as a fifth estate by Labour from the mid-1990s. Reforming the voting system, by boundary changes alone, has to be a good start, before even discussing PR, QMV or STV.

    Cameron may have won more seats, gained more votes. Clegg may be the ‘kingmaker’ – but Brown is still in Downing Street and when the hard times come later this year, they’ll sit over on the opposition benches and shout foul every day as they don’t really believe in their black hearts that they lost, having done everything possible to fix it, buy it or simply steal it.

  69. 284
    Dickie H says:

    I can’t see Brown leaving Downing St regardless of what deal the Tories and Lib Dems manage to stitch together. He’ll turn it down, insist on his right to have first shot at forming a Govt, and if he can’t put together a coalition he’ll try to go it alone. To secure the recovery, no time for a novice etc etc.

    So he loses the vote on the Queens Speech – so what? It is only constitutional convention that says he should step down then. He doesn’t have to leave if he doesn’t want to. I reckon it will take a mutiny by the Army to get rid of him. He’s dug himself in and is waiting for another economic crisis so he can save the world again and convince people to ignore the election result and give him another 5 years.

    In any other country there would be a howling mob trying to torch 10 Downing Street by now. I haven’t heard anything from Brown or his bumboys which comes close to recognising that the voters just gave Labour the biggest kicking since 1983. These twats really think that if they sit tight and say nothing, people will accept the situation and let them stay in power. What really worries me is that they might be right.

  70. 288
    Anonymous says:

    Libdems are showing that they only really want PR if it means a LibLab coalition. Not one Libdem activist interviewed over the weekend was in favour of LibCon.

    Be afraid as this is the future for us all.

  71. 290
    Boris speaks out. says:

    Off in Brussels this zombie Labour government is in the process of obliging future generations of Britons to pay “whatever it takes” to bail out the euro, and there is nothing we can do to stop it. The Lib-Con negotiations are still going on, in a foretaste of the Belgian orgies of tedium and paralysis that proportional representation will inflict on the country. Everyone is trying politely to work out exactly how many Cabinet seats to give a party that came a resounding third and did worse than in 2005.

  72. 291
    Attention Conservatives! salute your new overlord. LOL! says:

  73. 296
    RavingMad says:

    ………. another day and democracy continues to go down the pan………… at least it’s pleasant not having ministers telling us what to do/ what not to do all the time……..

  74. 297
    lolol says:

    Think Cleggy has left it too late now,the game he’s playing has now gone out of the media and the braindead will go back to Clegg who?,the power he had over Cameron is slowly leaching away,he should have got together on friday and the media would have kept him in the news, he now has his minions doing the work so the braindead think it’s all over.

  75. 299
    Walk_on_By says:

    If Dave can not roll through his essential legislative processes, namely:

    1) Arresting immigration control from the EU
    2) Derogation of the Social Chapter
    3) Fiscal reform towards less spending
    4) Phased reduction of public sector jobs

    … he will be sitting in No 10 with a phoney mandate and then get the blame afterwards when things go pear-shaped.

    He ought to walk away from any deal; get the Tories to stick to their guns in opposition, shooting down bills and get across to the Public the absolute piffle values of AV and PR, whose legacy would destroy the British moral.

    • 302
      A bloody angry NZ voter says:

      Don’t forget the ‘missing’ 100-200,000 votes ‘missing’ from the NZ and Oz british voters – most of us having already fled from the Brown Terror: so I have a very good Idea who those votes would have gone to!

      The votes were held up due to – yes you guessed it that bloody Volcano!

      Utter Labour Bullshit!!

      - my guess is that the Union baggage handlers ‘delayed’ the relevant sacks of mail + of course this “inconvenient truth” is being kept out of the media

      • 307
        God save us. says:

        If you fled the country, ran away in a fit of yellow belly and left us to fight the battle – why should you get a vote.
        You welshed out.
        I have no sympathy. You vote in the place you ran to and leave us alone.

        • 312
          A bloody angry NZ voter says:

          No way! we want our cake and to eat it + there is the little matter of our Pensions within the UK + We still hold our British passports

        • 329
          NZ is better than the UK says:

          To be fair, it’s shit in the UK, and NZ is very nice.

          If a proper revolution is on the cards though, we’ll be back, so stop talking fool and get planning.

          • Pommie Bastard says:

            Yea, NZ is nice and I’ve lived here 30 odd years but my advice would be to keep your powder dry here just in case the Brown clone, that dykey Marxist Helen Clark – our last “Prime Minister” – or one of her sleeper minions rises from the dead.

  76. 301
    tory Voter says:

    I would prefer a LibLab pact and let them implode. While at the same time put a Tory in charge of the tory party.

  77. 303
    Viz Top Tips says:

    Lost an election? Don’t want to stand down? Simple. Just turn up for work and carry on as if nothing had happened. Pretend you’ve won. You’ll probably get away with it.

    (Tip submitted by GB, London)

  78. 305
    God save us. says:

    For a start we need reform of the human rights garbage and immigration.
    Clegg won’t allow that.
    This will be the final nail in the coffin of the Tory anti EU right.
    Shame on those who are opposed to Europe and our membership, yet voted for Cameron knowing he was pro EU and pro the selling out of the independence of this nation.
    People of Buckingham – you betrayed us all.
    We needed a dozen UKIP MPs. Yet Tory voters are as thick and blindly bigoted as most labour voters with far less excuse.
    You went and voted for a pack of Cameron place men and women who are as much Tory (or even less so) than Clegg.
    Well done idiots.

  79. 311
    Steady as she goes. says:

    Seems to me things are ticking over quite nicely since the Civil service took over the day to day running of the country while the politician went off on the election trail.

    Politicians, who needs them?

  80. 317
    God save us. says:

    Bank stocks soaring.
    All is right with the world.
    Wake up!
    They are soaring because the EU just pledged billions to bail them out with taxpayers looted money, should there be national default.
    The taxpayer teat put up for the banks yet again.
    More bail out.

  81. 321
    Seth the pig farmer says:

    If Harman is not in the running it is because she fancies her chances after the wipeout at the next election. Labour are 3 leaders and 2 General Elections away from a PM – assuming the rules remain the same.

  82. 338
    Chattering Classes says:

    What was all that Tatler Tories tosh? No wonder none of them won their seats. FGS Dave stop surrounding yourself with well-heeled intellectuals and employ someone who can give you real insight into how it reads on the street. The vast majority are tax bashed, over-worked, in debt and fearful of a future with no public services or pension.

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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