Quote of the Day

Peter Mandelson said to Adam Boulton…

‘You’re not running for election’.

Adam Boulton said to Peter Mandelson…

‘Neither are you’.

Another New Media Scalp

Another day and another candidate has been scalped by comments they have left online. All of the major parties have now had to sack a PPC, with today being the turn of Scottish Tory Philip Lardner who said homosexuality is “not normal“. Lardner, fighting  for North Ayrshire and Arran, would likely have gone regardless of which medium he used to espouse his views.

Unlike Labour’s MacLennan and Cowan scalps, there was no attempt to fight the inevitable and with Cowan, a cover up instigated by the party machine. Guido will be returning to this subject soon…

Mandy v Clarke – The Anti-Spin Room

Exclusive : Peppa Pig is in Tory Bear’s Hands

Peppa Pig isn’t endorsing Labour because she is in Tory hands. This picture was taken minutes ago behind the scenes in the Guy News newsroom.  Peppa is being held by Tory Bear, who is known to his mother as Harry Cole. Happy Birthday Harry!

He is 24 today and single again girls.  He has never kissed a socialist – yet…

Clegg Stars in Both Tory and LibDem Election Broadcasts

Interesting Party Election Broadcasts last night, the Tories were fear-mongering that coalition government would be all about backroom deals and horse-trading. This is of course what is conventionally known as ‘politics’.  In the Tory broadcast a Clegg-like actor walked around Westminster offering dithering.  Apparently if you vote Conservative you will get a decisive liberal-conservative government firmly rooted on the centre-ground of politics.  If you vote Liberal on the other hand you could end up with a dithering liberal-centrist coalition government.

In the real LibDem PEB we had Clegg walking around Westminster offering change from the old politics, his first promise was an offer of “tax freedom”, a tax cut worth £700 to every taxpayer. Now 10 points higher than where they were when they started the campaign, the LibDems think their most attractive manifesto offer is a tax cut.

Tax cuts, the Cameroons told us, were the old politics that didn’t work with voters.  All the Tories needed to do was to offer Obama-style “change” from Gordon Brown. In the words of Sarah Palin: How’s that hopey change thing working out for y’all?

Peppa Pig has Left the Building

Labour last night issued a press release last night promising:

Peppa Pig Accepts Labour Invitation to Join Visit to Children’s Centre
The Labour Party has organised a visit to a children’s centre in South London to highlight our policies to support families. Yvette Cooper and Tessa Jowell will be shown around the centre and we are delighted that Peppa Pig, the star of children’s television, has accepted our invitation to join the visit.

For those of you without children under 5, Peppa Pig is a mega-star phenomenon, bigger than even Elvis nowadays.  Guido understands that Peppa Pig has pulled out of the event for fear it would be seen as an endorsement of the Labour Party…

UPDATE : Scenes of devastating disappointment at the Coin Street Nursery as tearful toddlers and young mothers learn a bitter lesson: Labour breaks its promises. Tearful toddlers asking “Where’s Peppa Pig? You promised!” Angry mothers and wailing children can only blame the wicked witches; Yvette and Tessa. Yvette has just issued one of her barmy soundbites “the Conservative and Liberal Democrats would form a ‘Coalition of Cuts for Children’ that would put children in the frontline for spending cuts”.  Not claiming they would actually eat your babies – which was probably what Ed Balls wanted to claim.

Guy News : Gordon – The Disaster Movie

LabourVision.TV launches today – a crowd sourced effort to produce an online anti-party, anti-political election broadcast.  Details revealed later as to how your home made video can be part of Gordon – the Disaster Movie premiering on May Day.  The bar is high. Come back tomorrow…

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Kerry’s Cowan Cover-up

The Labour Party were spinning earlier that as soon as the allegations about their disgraced PPC John Cowan emerged he was suspended: ‘The allegations that came to light after nominations closed are totally unacceptable and well below what the party expects of our candidates.”

Came to light “after nominations closed“?  That is just not true.

Social media guru and Twitter Tsar Kerry McCarthy, a Labour MP no less, was tipped off about Cowan’s dodgy online behaviour over three months ago.  Here is the tip-off email (verbatim):

From: █████ █████ <████████████@gmail.com>
Date: 12 February 2010 21:20
Subject: Private and Confidential and off the record
To: mccarthyk@parliament.uk

Dear Kerry,

My name is █████ █████ and I work in the motorsports industry. I represent drivers, teams, and component suppliers in the motorsport industry. I believe you like a couple of friends have suffered from being stalked by a certain John Cowan. Both the girls I know that I know are racing drivers who raced from an early age. I became aware of ████’s problems with Cowan when we were at Brands Hatch for a race. ████ had run out of finances and had hired her car to a driver who I was coaching. Her father was engineering the car. All was fine until I noticed that ████ and her Dad looked a bit woried. When I enquired what was wrong; her father pointed out John Cowan standing by the car and told me of the trouble that ████ had receiving lude emails. I asked Cowan to leave and not bother ████ or my driver again.

Until this was mentioned I had just assumed he was a ‘harmless’ idiot that lived in a dreamworld. I am afraid motor racing attracts these type of fools as does politics. Since then I have found out ████ is not the only female racing driver that has had problems with Cowan. And now I am reliably informed that you yourself have had problems with this man.

I am now horrified to find out that he is standing for Parliament in South Cambridgeshire and I am supprised he was even picked as a candidate with a false CV!

It has now been bought to our attention you have been pestered by this man; I don’t believe in this age that he should be anywhere near public office. Can he be removed as candidate before he can do any real damage?

I llok forward to your reply.

regards

█████ █████

07███ ██████

So what did Kerry McCarthy do next…

Tories Panic, City Relaxes

George Osborne this afternoon is trying to convince us that a hung parliament will mean higher interest rates as investors panic and the gilt market plunges.   Guido begs to differ, arguing that if on May 7 the Tories went into […]

+ READ MORE +

Quote of the Day

Tom Newton Dunn, political editor of the Sun, apparently said…

“It is my job to see that Cameron f***ing well gets into Downing Street”[…]

+ READ MORE +

The Brown Nixon Elvis Conspiracy Theory Competition

Guido has been racking his brain for an explanation into the thinking behind the Elvis support act for Gordon.  Here are my top conspiracy theories:

  1. Gordon is living out a Richard Nixon fantasy, he seems himself as a man of

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Second Labour Candidate Sacked

Former “glamour model” John Cowan has become the second Labour Party parliamentary candidate to be sacked after their online postings were revealed. John Cowan, who was expelled from the Liberal Democrats after sending sexually explicit messages to Labour’s […]

+ READ MORE +



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Quote of the Day

Ed Balls on his defeat:

“I’m a symbol of the vibrancy of our democracy.”

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