April 6th, 2010

The Circus Begins

It was a media circus this morning. ITN, Sky and the BBC had cameras at College Green, Millbank, County Hall, Downing Street and of course in the air. They have now retired to the adventure playground structure erected overlooking Parliament. Despite the obvious focus today on the Prime Minister, the other parties have fought hard to get attention.  The Tories were savvy enough to slot Cameron’s speech into the coverage when they knew Brown would be on the move, but Clegg hasn’t had a look in.

Other attention seeking efforts didn’t go so well…


  1. 1
    Oh and by the way says:

    How could I have missed that red arrow?

    • 13
      Anonymous says:

      lib dems got “The beginning of the end of gordon brown” sweet!

      • 24
        Lord Wayne of Trombone says:

        any of you readers want to get dressed up in a chicken suit and follow gordon on his travels.
        will be more interesting than his words/ lies

        • 49
          Disaffected says:

          John Sople was off on his one-sided inaccurate spin this morning touting propaganda for Libour. Out of context to his questioning of Michael Gove he felt the need to make a quip about Cameron beng an Eton toff. Robinson was also off and running for Liebour- make sure your voice is heard on the BBC website.

          Trust Brown’s judgment: Brown robbed everyone’s pension in 1997 and is now wondering what should be done to finance people in their old age- Brown won’t let you down. Brown sold our gold when it was at its lowest price costing the UK £7 billion pounds- Brown won’t let you down. Brown improperly financed the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, thousands of people lost their lives because Brown did not provide enough money. Brown’s denied this in complete contrast to the evidence of military chiefs. He then realised he did not fund the wars properly and wrote to confirm he was wrong- Brown won’t let you down. Brown wanted ot change the face of Britian b mass immigration- he ie dbaout the statistics- Brown wo’t let you down. Brown is the one who was given a good economy and now it is bankrupt- Brown won’t let you down. Brown still claims for a second home that he does not have, Brown won’t let you down. Brown recently told the country- I won’t let you down. He cannot be trusted. Brown has let you down for 13 years, it is time for change, vote him out.

          • Mr Ned says:

            Radio Two at lunchtime in an all out attack on homophobic tories being unfit to Govern. Phone-in, “will the homophobic comments of the tories hurt them at the election?”

            Suggestive that they want to burn the gays at the stake!!! Attacking Chris Grayling for the Allowing people to use their conscience to decide who to allow into their own private homes = we want all gays dead!

            Cameron not mentioning “straight and gay” in his speech this morning was NOT an attack on straight people but clearly a sign of rampant fascist anti gay homophobia.

            The BBC are utterly and completely throwing everything they have got at getting Brown re-elected, or at least in power with the Lib-Dems.

            My conscience is telling me to vote UKIP, but I may just vote tory to spite the heterophobic corporatist fascists at the BBC.

            And then pray that the tories dump Cameron and get a real conservative in charge who will scrap the BBC entirely.

          • Good on yer Ned.

          • Peter Grimes says:

            That makes sound sense, Mr Ned. If Cameron gets in it will be with a small majority in my view. The alternative is 5 more years of Brown+NoMarkCloggy, and because they propose to change FPTP, give votes to 16 year olds and likely to immigrants as well, we will not have a chance of an alternative government.


          • Fat Bloke on Tour says:

            Nr Med

            Who are you:

            1) Upmarket NY crotch feeler?
            2) Graphic / Pretentious London luvvy

            One thing you are not is a purveyor of any deep and incitelful commentary of UK politics.

          • MadMitch says:

            Spunky Spunky Plastic Paddy

            Any chance of a new topic this is getting a bit stale?

          • Fat Bloke on Tour says:


            Covering up for Nr Med?

            Didn’t think you would be into a NY Gentleman Outfitter?
            Or is it all a bit incestous on London right wing blogging circles?

            Graphic designer my arse.

          • CAERTIFEID INDEPENDENT (try not to laugh) says:

            Lovely bit of TV recycling for Coulson and CCHQ there
            Shame you’ll be out in the cold after May

          • Fat Bloke on Tour says:


            They are talking about your Polish au pair again.

            By the way, how much does her pocket money go up when the wife is away on business?

          • Mr Ned has partaken of too many rocks this evening I would wager.

            If you vote Tory to spite the BBC you might as well pay your fucking TV license.

            BBC ain’t anti-Tory. BBC is anti anything that ain’t pro-BBC. If you’re too fucking thick to see that and vote for Cast Iron fucking “I love the BBC” David fuicking Cameron…

            Then at the very least you’ll appreciate why the country is so fucked.

            Easily manipulated mongs like you. Now fuck off. You traitor. Go “Vote for Change”.


      • 33
        Yorkie says:

        It’s at times like this that I wished I lived in a democracy, where my vote counted and not in a rock solid Labour seat with a newly “parachuted in” labour/Blairite candidate.

        • 44
          North Durham resident says:

          Tell me about it

        • 68
          Pottery Lottery says:

          And we’ve got Mandy’s glove-puppet here in Stoke.

          • Brown's a Tosser says:

            I sympathise and it is why in the marginals people vote to get rid of this government.

          • Animal says:

            I bet a certain other one-eyed party lader is chuckling at the mess Labour have so far made of retaining Stoke Central. It’s a real time-warp area with a lot of disillusioned Labour supporters who will be drawn to the British Fascists Party when they discover the Labour candidate is not a local but instead some Southerner called Tristram who’s a friend of an uphill gardener. They may go as well to Gary Elsby, a long-time Labour party member who was shunted off the selection list to allow Nr Hunt to be picked.

            Stoke Central is going to be an interesting one to watch. Despite a 10,000 majority over the LibDems and Tories it’s definitely a three-horse race there, and the Tories have a (small) chance to get voted in from the split in the Labour vote with Norsheen “Belly Dancer” Bhatti.

          • I'll have some of that says:

            Then vote for Gary Elsby from Stoke…..the worst you’ll get is Nora Bhatti…….

          • Anonymous says:

            I don’t know if he’s a puppet but Mandy certainly does shove his hand up the man’s jacksie.

        • 220
          Eric Cartman says:

          You just have to vote for who is the best candidate.
          Dicuhe bag

    • 32
      Booking says:

      were is my 13 grand ticket

    • 45
      ? says:

      So what does it say?

      It looks like VOTE FON CHANGE to me

    • 66
      Vote for change says:

      Vote for the difference, whatever that is.

    • 343
      WVM says:

      That white van – Wot’s the White Van for again?

    • 486
      Up sh1t creek says:

      Peter Mandelson’s bastard “Digital Economy” bill is being rammed through parliament today, strange how you have to find out this news from non-UK based foreign news.

      Any politicians that votes for this bill, including Conservative, you know they are for the censorship of the internet, and you MUST vote against them at the coming general election.

  2. 1
    • 9
      Peter Grimes says:

      A bit like his performance in the GE, then!

      Still, he may get fewer votes in Jockishland for wanting to foist more immigrants on them because the lazy Jockanese don’t want to work, unless it’s in the black!

      Jockish Jobs for Jockish JSA Claimants!

      • 57
        Jock McJock says:

        We want MORE immigrants. Its them wot’s pays the taxes.

        That and the generous subsidy we get cos Labour don’t want to sh*t on their own core vote.

        (Do you think the SNP cottoned onto that and are bleeding you all dry?)

    • 17
      Clegg says:

      I’ve shagged 30, er, women!

      • 71
        Thats News says:

        Unlike Brown who has shagged a country of 61 million people. No wonder he looks so tired!

      • 307
        Sir William Waad says:

        Clegg, you naughty old man! Was Nora Batty one of them?

        • 353
          Peter Carter-Fuck says:

          She goes like a fucking train that one. Mind you, it’s not just her stockings that are a bit wrinkled. Still, every hole’s a goal, as Grim Gordon The Gurning Gulper was telling Davina Milipede just the other night at Torture Garden.

    • 69
      Double Vision says:

      two number 1 posts are you Guido?

    • 91
      PM says:

      I’m with Old Holborn. Who’s Nick Clegg?

    • 167
      Proud Englishman says:

      Vote Lib Dem get Brown. Keep repeating it!

    • 357
      Up sh1t creek says:

      Nick Clegg who? A yellow coloured Communist, goes well with the red Communists (aka New Labour).

      • 410
        10/1 on a hung parliament says:

        It is going to be so so so very sweet when Cameron comes snivelling looking for the LibDems to support him in a hung parliament. And even sweeter when Clegg tells him the price.

        • 482
          Nick2 says:

          No – let Clegg damn himself by association with Labour. A Lib/Lab coalition couldn’t last more than 6 months before hitting the rocks.

  3. 3
    Got-By-Cluster-Fuck says:

    Watched McSnot shaking hands with the great unwashed in St Pancras on Sky, and was interested the only people he took time to say more than good morning to were children.

    Presumably because he was certain they would not ask any awkward questions.

    He really does appear terrified of the electorate.

    • 11
      Peter Grimes says:

      It’s called proselytising!

    • 12
      Govt-By-Cluster-Fuck says:

      Damn, was laughing so hard I mis-spelt my name

    • 14
      yuk says:

      Brown seems to have a thing about children. His face always becomes animated when he’s surrounded by schoolboys.

      • 27
        Sarah Brown says:

        I know, he gets positively orgasmic!

      • 29
        Gordon Brown says:


      • 40
        The Beast of Clerkenwell says:

        What about Hollie Greig?
        Or is Downs syndrome Gordon only attracted to Male Downs children.

        Its a fact that the gurning one has an obession with children , be it “lifting them out of poverty” curing them of cancer or aids
        McMental truly loves children. Perhaps when he is scaked he can get a job as Santa in the Glasgow branch of LIDL

        • 170
          shrinking sack of shite says:

          I don’t know what “scaked” means but sounds painful enough for me to want to see it used on all the troughers ……

      • 55
        Anonymous says:

        It’s because they’re the only people he’s certain won’t be voting against him …

    • 169
      Proud Englishman says:

      It’s called cowardice.

  4. 4
    Olly boy says:

    Yeah, who’s this Clegg?

    • 21
      Compo's Favourite Ferret says:

      Haven’t you ever seen “Last of The Summer Wine”?

      • 47
        Nick Clegg says:

        When we gain power , ferreting will be abolished, uness its of the chutney kind, then it will be compulsory for all boys over the age of 5

      • 411
        Olly boy says:

        Yes, sorry I do know him.

        Wikipedia say’s of the chracters in Last of the Summer Wine:

        “The men never seem to grow up and develop a unique perspective on their equally eccentric fellow townspeople”.

        A fairly accurate description of the Limp Dums and many parts of our society I’d say.

        Question is, who’s Foggy and Compo?

    • 41
      Peter Grimes says:

      Are you Olly from ML?

    • 406
      Proud Englishman says:

      Vote Clegg get Brown

  5. 5
    Tory Dan says:

    Just saw on Sky Gorgon at St. Pancreas getting the train with the plebs pushing some woman out the way after he shook her hand!

    Is this man a complete retard mumbling to people ‘its a very nice day isnt it!’

    Yes you one eyed idiot because finally people get the chance to get rid of you.

  6. 6

    Any one heard rumours that the Prime Minister of England is thinking of calling an election some time soon? My sources are impeccable.

    • 100
      Can't remember my moniker says:

      No. No truth in that at all. Nothing to see here. Move along.

      • 145
        Anonymous says:

        No truth in anything NuLiebour say.Tractor stats, smears & lies.

        • 395
          Doctor Miggins of Sudan says:

          Are you that devious ‘Gordon’ fellow who goes around pretending you don’t know who you are and then when no one is looking you call a snap general election? Fiendishly cunning

    • 419
      Anonymous says:

      Gordon Brown is the Mad Madi.

  7. 6
    you vill do as you are told!! says:

    I won’t ever criticise Guido’s modding again. This place is a bastion of free speech compared to these jumped-up little Stalinists at http://www.housepricecrash.co.uk

    “Forum announcement
    Now that the General Election date has been announced temporary rules will be put in place on the House prices and the Economy forum and Off topic forum.
    There will be a thread entitled “THE ONLY GENERAL ELECTION THREAD” in the Off Topic Forum . ALL political threads will be merged into that thread. Any posts of a political nature derailing or hijacking any other threads will be removed at the moderators’ discretion.
    If you want to make an individual political statement then there are other political forums for this purpose. Those who persistently ignore this temporary ruling will be banned for the duration of the election period.
    This is the decision of the Moderating Team and any posts questioning the decision of the Moderators will be removed.”

    • 10
      laughing my arse off says:

      If the posters at housepricecrash weren’t such a bunch of compliant sheep they would boycott the site until the mods behaved themselves.

    • 30
      Old Skool Nokia says:

      You really should have twigged by now the only political views tolerated on HPC are those supporting the B.N.P, or other sections of the extreme right. Start a thread saying alien lizards are manipulating the General Election and you should be fine.

      • 34
        JB says:

        Housepricecrash.co.uk sounds like an offshoot of Brown’s Britain where Stalinist authoritarianism is alive and well. Do the posters not mind being dictated to and constrained in what they can post with the threat of deletion and being banned if they fail to obey?

        • 74
          Dick Tumb says:

          I’m going to register and post I have come to be banned.

          • el gaucho says:

            The posters on hpc are always going on disparagingly about the ‘sheeple’ but, in reality, it’s they who are the real sheeple, controlled and herded about by a bunch of control-freak moderators.

            Anyone who could think for themselves has left in despair at the cultism and control-freakery on there..

        • 178
          Ken says:

          All the decent posters left HPC long ago. It’s just prattle from a bunch of desperate halfwits these days.

  8. 8
    Lcromps says:

    Oh this is going to be so much fun bring it on………………

  9. 15
    Gay Gordon says:

    If you believe in Jockocracy, vote Labour.

  10. 16
    Hacked Off Already says:

    I have just thumped my TV after seeing Sarah Broon on BBC1 and Milipede on BBC2. How on earth did windbag the Welshman get on Toady at 8.05 thi morning?

    • 22
      Down Periscope says:

      BBC are corrupt. I do not even listen to their shit. Vote for the ABBA party.

      ‘Anyone But Brown Again’ Party.

      Saw it on the Telegraph Blogs.

    • 97
      Hugh Janus says:

      I am pleased to say that Toady trailed his visit in good time for me to make a point of completely avoiding the hypocritcal tosser.

      The Welsh Windbag:

      ‘I was against the EU – that’s why me and the missus got stuck into their very deep and very expensive trough.

      I was also against the House of Lords, but funnily enough I accepted a peerage.

      Man of principle – that’s me!’

    • 217
      Mr Ned says:

      Good job you are not listening to Radio 2. Attacking homophobic tories and asking, “will their homophobia damage them at the polls?”

      NOT a mention of the numerous “gay only” guesthouses that exist in this country!

      Fucking hypocrites!

  11. 18
    Dazed & Confused says:

    For more of this wilful indoctrination of children, please remember to vote Labour, as you’d simply be mad not too.

  12. 23
    LOL says:

    It’s only day one but already Chris Huhne has had a hysterical meltdown on Sky News.

    The man is completely fucking deranged.

    • 31
      Huhne in meltdown on day one says:

      Huhne was almost frothing at the mouth. He won’t last the week never mind four weeks of an election campaign.

    • 56
      Groucho says:

      Return to your constituencies and prepare for oblivion

    • 239
      Peter Carter-Fuck says:

      To be defeated by a no-mark like Clegg will do that to a fellow.

  13. 25

    IS it over yet?

    • 113
      Andy Q says:

      I’m moving into the garden shed for a month. Give me a shout on the 6th and I’ll nip out and vote Tory.

      • 153

        I have mailed my tory candidate this morning – new feller to replace the trougher Winterton – to ask for one good reason other than getting rid of Gordon to vote for him. I’m not holding my breath, but unless he comes up with something good I’m not voting for Dave.

        • 181
          Proud Englishman says:

          That is a vote for Brown. Is that what you want?

          • If you think Labour stand a chance in Macclesfield you’ve obviously never been there – they could pin a blue rosette on a complete buffoon and he’d be elected.

            That’s got to be the explanation for Winterton, anyway.

            I’m in a similar position where I live, but our MP (Gerald ‘Action Man’ Howarth) at least has comedic value.

          • Mr Ned says:

            Apparently I am now in one of the marginals. Was a rock solid labour seat for years, but now under threat of changing to the tories.

            Damn that really leaves me in a quandry…

            I really want to vote UKIP as they mirror my values, I would feel good voting UKIP and feel that the tories are just another Rothschild puppet show. …. but I would hate for the labour candidate to win here too.


          • Peter Grimes says:

            Proximity to calamity certainly sharpens the mind, eh Mr Ned!

          • Mr Ned is obviously shilling for a higher power.

            In truth Conservative dreams will turn into Nasty party and UKrap territories.

            Mr Ned would like you to vote Labour, Tory or Liberal Democrat.

            But this time, Mr Ned will laugh at you for voting Labour, Lib or third Party

            Just like Mr Ned did in 1997 when he voted for Cameron’s Daddy: Blair.

            Well done Mr Ned. £5 a hour plus perks to you. Well done son.

  14. 28
    SpiralTrance says:

    fuck off gordon brown you twat.

    • 369
      The Slave Labour Party says:

      How very dare you speak of your betters this way.

      Thanks to the generosity of Gordon Brown and his Party, I’m a fully qualified Diversity Coordinator Assistant Trainer Facilitator on £50k plus 6% non-contributory gold-plated pension, plus numerous other benefits.

      Over the past 13 years, the Labour Party has been so generous to your Public Sector Masters that we have run up a bit of a bill on the National Credit Card, which you and your family will have the privilege of paying off over the next couple of decades.

      So get back to work and give me half your money to keep me in the lifestyle to which I have become so very accustomed.

      I am altering the deal. Pray I don’t alter it any further.

      Now say thank you.


  15. 35
    Bankers Party says:

    And the result is in: massive swing to Austerity Party with years ahead of UK taxpayers making good the losses of private bankers.

    • 38
      SpiralTrance says:

      to be honest Gordon Brown is just as much guilty as the bankers are. I seriously don’t believe he didn’t realise that the debt based economic boom and banking system wasn’t going to come down like a pack of cards.

      • 53
        Groucho says:

        It boils down to the question we have all had about Brown for may years – mad, or just incredibly crap?

        • 80
          Anonymous says:


          • Lord G says:

            Both, but also focussed entirely on persuading himself and others that he is the right person at the right time to do the right job. I seriously think he is deluded enough to believe his own shit, and genuinely believes the state of the country is purely down to bad luck… Imbecile does not even come close.

        • 88
          Longbow says:

          or completely focused on his progressiveness business venture to fuck UK plc for whatever purpose which that lot who really are in charge, require.
          There is NO political solution, but there is a solution.

          • Madme Defarge says:

            Totally deluded with an overarching sense of entitlement. He really has no grip with reality. I really do think it will all be revealed that he his seriously psychotic.

          • Snottie says:

            shoot ‘em

      • 119
        AC1 says:

        Gordon Brown is more guilty than the Bankers are. After all it’s HIM that was supposed to be prudent whilst M4 was going crazy.

        Then you realise Credit => Tax.

        It was deliberate, he just got his timing wrong (Tony didn’t).

    • 205
      Susie says:

      And who was it who decided to bail out the banks (most especially Scottish and northern banks where Labour MPs have their constituencies) with our money?

  16. 36
    Anonymous says:

    I noticed that VFC thing intended for the helicopter and thought it was quite clever as it may end up going in all the bulletins that show the trip to the queen, but I expect that it was pretty pointless and achieved little – but every little helps.

    • 150
      Australian says:

      Anon – I somehow suspect that the Al-jabeeba broadcasts will have a careful bit of editing done for later news bulletins so as to remove the moment when the VFC banner comes into view.

      Solely in the interests of fairness and neutrality of course…

      • 221
        Mr Ned says:

        Yup the BBC will give equal time to how great labour are and how awful the tories are. Absolute equality in coverage!

  17. 37
    Chris says:

    Brown’s stopping to hug every little child in St. Pancras was vomit inducing

  18. 39
    Private Sponge says:

    That labour shilling Scottish tart, from the Brown Broadcasting Corporation, Laura Kunigsberg ? said that she spotted a ‘paper shredding van’ outside number 10 this morning. Obviously they’ve had their instructions from Gorgon to carry on shredding the incriminating stuff whilst he’s away in Kent.

    • 212
      bergen says:

      She’s much better than Toenails when she stands in for him.They’ll need every shredder in the Kingdom for the next month to cover up their misdeeds.

    • 224
      Anonymous says:

      They are still shredding the Glenrothes register.

    • 280
      labour is a cancer on society says:

      Guido needs to get on to ‘Shreddergate’ and the ‘Brown, Morrisons and the Tampons’ story asap.

    • 338
      Anonymous says:

      Ah, yes, Laura Kunigsberg – a famous Scottish lassie from Glen Kunigsberg and a member of Clan Kunigsberg. Every Burns’ Night she recites poems by that famous Scottish poet, Goethe.

    • 416
      Moley says:

      Shredding public records is an offence.

      I do hope that the civil service have a clear idea and clear instructions on what documents must be retained for public records.

      • 456
        Gobshite says:

        Of course they do. Anything that paints the Gorgon Imperium in a bad light must be put into the shredder.

        On a related note, I would love it if someone connected with Operation Ore leaked the whole list to wikileaks just before the election.

  19. 42
    Hatchet Harry says:

    With The LibDems and Labour a lefty can have two bites of a cherry.
    Add to that the BBC and a few papers.
    Oh and most qaungo’s and charities not forgetting the civil service as well.
    Fucking hell we need a far right counterweight.
    Cameron, shit or get off the pot.

  20. 43
    Telly Gordon says:

    The BBC are still giving the Mong more time on air, time for a complaint to the electoral coms

    • 189
      Proud Englishman says:

      Where the BBC will be most devious and most biased is in their selection of “floating voters” to interview throughout the election campaign.

      Watch out for lots of anti Tory stuff from people supposedly picked at random.

      • 247
        Mr Ned says:

        Yup, Radio 2 lunchtime call-in. “Will Chris Grayling’s rampant homophobia hurt the tories at the election?”

        First caller, a homosexual man, who “considered” voting tory but who now cannot trust them.

        Second caller, an ex pub landlord from the 1980′s who was called homophobic!

        Third response was an email from a “Christian” who finds homosexuality to be an abhorrence, but who still thinks that Chris Grayling went too far and that even an extremist Christian homophobic bigot thinks that gays should be allowed to stay wherever they like.

        Where do they recruit these callers from? Central casting? Labour clubs the length of Britain?

        They would not allow me onto the air to call them out on GAY ONLY guest-houses though! despite the fact that they are breaking the law, with impunity, every single day! My call was screened out for some reason!

        Even the actual guests on this show. In the studio, a bright loud voice for a gay pressure group given free reign to spread lies and exagerrations without question or interruption. The other guest was on the phone, (easy to cut him off) and sounded like the Major from fawlty towers. Was interrupted and questioned about everything.

        The BBC are all out using EVERY biased trick in the book to attack the tories whilst giving a fig-leaf of attention to impartiality.

        • 430
          Moley says:

          When the BBC want to interview gays for a programme, all they need to do is put up a poster in the corridor. Heterosexuality in the BBC is the exception, not the rule.

          They don’t need any outside lines.

          Never, in the history of the BBC, has it been so corrupt; and such an open threat to democracy.

          If you don’t like what you hear; don’t pay for it.

          Boycott the licence fee.

          • Gobshite says:

            Well, at least they are carbon neutral.

            Lord Reith spinning in his grave creates a lot of green energy you know.

  21. 48
    Phil's Tampon says:

    Dimwit Murnaghan on Sky talking up Labour’s Election Chances. He may have left the BBC but he continues to practice their style of journalistic bias. He should stick to hosting quiz shows.

  22. 51
    Oi gis us a job says:

    Fucking hell did you see the shifty bastard get on the train, he was sweating like a suicide bomber.

    Also Tory trolls asleep on the job again, why didn’t they have anyone with ‘DON’T VOTE FOR THIS MAN’ T-shirts on the train. How funny would of been for Gordon to be standing with loads of students in the background with those t-shirts on.

    CCHQ really need to hire me.

    • 286
      Mr Ned says:

      We will probably find out later that it was a specially hired carriage for that train and normal, real people were not allowed anywhere near the soon-to-be former Prime Mentalist!

  23. 52
    Fire Up The Quattro says:

    When are we going to get details of the great Tory Repeal Act 2010?

    • 58
      lolol says:

      All change from red to blue that’s the only thing we will get.

    • 104
      Can't remember my moniker says:

      There will have to be a number of them. Remember back to Margaret Thatcher’s first term?

      • 241
        Mad as hell and won't have to take it for too much longer says:

        Yep, I sure do. And I thought the country was fucked then, boy look at it now.

  24. 59
    The Dirty Rat says:

    The Digital Economy Bill will now be rushed through the commons. It looks like Mandelson has delivered what he promised to David Geffen when he dined with him in Corfu last year.
    I wonder what his price was – a lot more than I earn in a year I’m sure.

    • 73
      oy vey says:

      Mandelson is the Rothschilds special representative in the British government.

      • 115
        Mr Ned says:

        The entire Parliament is the Rothschild special representitive.

        • 142
          SpiralTrance says:

          good point mr ned. if you really want to know who’s going to win the election just ask the rothschild clan who they’re backing.

          of note I heard from a good source that when the banks were about to go bust gordon brown went to see sir evelyn de rothschild and asked him what to do and mr redshield told the pm to get the tax payers to bail the banks.

        • 293
          Mr Ned says:

          Well the entire British Government has been “in-hock” to the City of London bankers since the Bank of England was first chartered.

          Hmmmmmmm there are those maritime words again…….

          Those to whom you are in debt to are your masters. Fuck the electorate, we exclusively serve the bank. The Palace of Westminster is subservient to the City of London.

    • 82
      Groucho says:

      Those Patek Philippe watches, Saville Row suits and multi million pound houses don’t buy themselves you know.

      Isn’t socialism great?

    • 93
      The Dirty Rat says:

      Also at the same dinner party was the son of Colonel Gaddafi and we all know where that one led to. Terminal prostate cancer my arse!
      Great to be on holiday and have two nice little earners in one night.

      • 145
        SpiralTrance says:

        strange thing is alex salmond always goes on about an independant scotland free from the influence of westminster yet it appears the snp are obviously taking orders off the rothschild just like westminster is.

        • 296
          Mr Ned says:

          Most of the fucking WORLD is taking their orders from the Rothshchild family!

    • 102
      Hugh Janus says:

      They may rush it through the Commons but perhaps the Lords will be less keen to do likewise?

  25. 60
    Stepney says:


    Today there is no Prime Minister.

    We do not have a Labour Government.

    This feels fresh and good. I am liking it. Now for the next phase….

    • 85
      Mad as hell and won't have to take it for too much longer says:

      That’s made my day. Let this condition continue ad infinitum.

    • 168
      ShoutsAtTheTV says:

      Ahhhh… That’s a really nice way of looking at the situation. The weight has lifted…

    • 222
      taxed to death says:

      unfortunately my Ni tax has gone up again.

    • 441
      Madme Defarge says:

      Now I thought he was no longer Prime Minister but the braoadcasters are still calling him that. A slip? Deliberate? Or is he still technically PM?

  26. 64
    Jon says:

    With all recent polls except one suggesting an overall Tory majority, what dirty tricks do Brown and co have up their sleeves for the next four weeks?
    A “terrorist” outrage? A stitch-up of Cameron on invented “evidence”?

    I just know from the sordid smirk on Brown’s face today that something very underhand and unpleasant is being planned.

    • 76
      JVG says:

      Brown would love to have another senior Tory arrested on trumped up charges.

      • 89
        Mad as hell and won't have to take it for too much longer says:

        And the BBC to dutifully publicise it at every opportunity.

    • 86
      Clog Dance says:

      They famously did it to a Labour supporter who heckled Jack Warts at their own Party Conference. National security threatened by a pensioner! No shame.

      The VC hero who snubbed Gordon Brown has the right idea. Why tread in it if you walk on by?

    • 105
      DNTT says:

      Headline in the Mirror for May 6th.
      McCann body found under Call-Me-Dave patio.

    • 460
      Wankersrthey says:

      no he’d just had his incontinence bag changed and sarah slipped him an extra length early doors b4 he saw HM. Then back for a quick fisting from peter and onto the stump for day one…operation ‘king con’

  27. 65
    Gordon Clown says:

    Thank you fellow clowns and loonies for letting me have my turn on the big chair, I will now go back to wearing my dunce hat and sit in the corner.


    • 218
      stilyagi_air_corps says:

      “When I read about Gordon Brown’s plan to give the UK more broadband, I couldn’t restrain my laughter. Isn’t this the same clown now busy circumventing democracy to take away broadband from Britons who already have it? And what good would broadband do them if they’re punished for using it (or even being suspected of using it)? Laying cables would be a waste of resources if people are not allowed to use them. Brown did suggest another possible use for broadband. He said that it would enable MPs to better communicate with their constituents and keep track of what they want.”

      – Richard Stallman

      • 302
        Mr Ned says:

        No it will all be one way broadband. It will carry labour propaganda (via the BBC) into the homes of the people 24/7. And it will be useful to track dissenting voices in the comments sections.

        Whilst they bend over backwards to support Google taking on the Chinese and they fight for the Chinese to have unfettered and unrestricted access to the net, they are doing every thing they can to get a Chinese style clampdown on the net over here!

        FUCKING cuntS!!!!

  28. 67
    Adios El Gordo says:

    We need our own wind up gordo campaign.

    we have only 4 weeks left to do it before he gets some charity job harrassing the vulnerable and telling them hw he is going to save the world – may i suggest playing a cuckoo clock evertime he talks?

  29. 70
    dish the dirt says:

    The Sun, News of the World, and Sunday Times have some very tasty stuff on Brown and some of his closest cronies which they have been saving especially for this election campaign.

    Some of this stuff will be shocking and leave Labour fighting for it’s very survival.

  30. 77
    Loony Labour Tunes says:

    Gordon has used the weekend to stuff Money4Gold envelopes in order to fill the UK coffers. Great idea but don’t think there is going to be much left over.

    • 427
      Mr Ned says:

      That would be funny IF Gordon Brown had not actually sold a huge chunk of this nation’s gold reserves for a price that is LESS than what many of these Cash-four-Gold style conmen are currently paying householders for their gold (typically 20 – 40% of it’s real value).

      So far, Brown’s decision to sell OUR gold when he did has cost this nation the equivalent of two “Black Wednesdays.” Yeah TWO!!!

      But even that is dwarfed by the Government debt burden, servicing which is now the equivalent of a “Black Wednesday” EVERY WEEK!

      With the actual Black Wednesday, it was the currency markets that eventually picked up the bill, the country bought a lot of currency, which inflated in value following black Wednesday and ALL the losses were reversed inside 18 months.

      With the current debt tsunami equivalent of a Black Wednesday every week, it is you and me and every other ordinary tax payer that will be picking up the bill for at least two decades.

  31. 92
    Martin Day says:

    I demand 5 more years of Gordon Brown as Prime Minister

    • 103
      Gordon ( SoldGoldAtThe ) BottomBrown says:

      I wrecked the economy: any danger I can have another go ???

    • 116
      DNTT says:

      Ask your mother to wipe the easter egg from around your mouth Martin.

      Oh, it’s not chocolate! Dirty little coprophiliac oompah-lumpah!

    • 194
      Anonymous says:

      Strange. Martin Day has been conspicuous by his absence from posting his LieBour cr*p on here; unless he has been hiding behind a different nom de plume. Methinks he had come to realise that which the majority of us knew long ago. NuLiebour are unwanted, finished, kaput, & long may that continue to be the case

      • 342
        sockpuppet #4 says:

        for me its like lent in reverse.

        I am giving up politics for the next 40 days.

        Shower of shites.

  32. 95
    The Sleeper says:

    “Get the big decisions wrong and hundreds of thousands of lives are affected”

    Yeah,you bleedin’ murderer..just like the hundreds of thousands dead in Iraq.

  33. 99
    Gordon Brown's Press Officer says:

    What does David Cameron mean by the meaningless ‘big society’? Obesity for all? It’s ‘BS’ for short, of course.

    • 109
      Gordon ( SoldGoldAtThe ) BottomBrown says:

      I prefer Big Oppressive Government: Vote me, vote B.O.G.

    • 442
      Mr Ned says:

      It means people getting together and volunteering to provide more and more of the services that the state currently thinks we need and currently charges us for whether there is a need or not!

      I hope this will rid us of “service designers”. Vastly overpaid pen-pushers whose job it is to think up more ways to spend OUR money. If there isn’t currently provision for a service, they will create one, regardless of the need, and tick all the boxes needed to justify their own vastly inflated salary. It is a bureaucratic cancer that is spreading throughout town and city and county halls all over the country.

      Perhaps if we are given the choice to decide for ourselves whether to give our own personal time and money to provide a service, then we may discover that the service is not really necessary after all. IF it is necessary, then good, community and socially minded people will provide it. Do not expect the tax-payer to provide it regardless of need, just because it keeps a fucking seat polisher in a well funded non job.

  34. 107
    Angry yopung upper class Tory twerp says:

    Whatever happens in the election, Peter Mandelson and Michael Ashcroft will still be making decisions for you in Parliament after it.

  35. 111
    Kev says:

    Fuck me, that photocall in Downing Street must surely have wrecked Labour’s chances? When you mention the hoons individually, it’s enough to turn your stomach. Then you see them in a collective photo opportunity:Brown, Balls, Mandleson, Harman, Darling, Wee Dougie, Cooper, Murphy, Straw, Millipede’s etc.. Fucking Hell, who in their right mind could ever vote this bunch of traitorous bastards back in?!

    • 117
      Bob Ain'tworth-Atoss says:

      Don’t forget me, the Nation’s Defence Secretary !!!

      • 123
        Maladroit Labour Chump says:

        Whatever happened to Geoff Hoon, Patsy Hewitt, James Purnell,Ruth Kelly,Hazel Blears,Caroline Flint,Des Browne, Old Uncle Tom Cobbleigh and all ??

        • 193
          Anonymous says:

          Don’t forget Jaqui Smith!!

        • 253
          Peter Carter-Fuck says:

          Caroline’s never been busier working for my parliamentary escort agency. It’s honest work and paid in cash, so none of the NI bollocks. As an election special she’ll do a two girl with Sally Bercow, only £200, but it’s £50 off if you let Mr Speaker watch. He likes to watch.

      • 125
        Kev says:

        I was on the verge of vomiting, couldn’t write anymore of the Bastard’s names…..

    • 244
      McGroom says:

      How can you imply incompetance among these fine, upstanding Right Honourable Ministers when Gordon recruited the Government Of All the Talents.

      Everyone who works for our expansive government or are a beneficiary of Gordon’s wonderful liberal equality, social welfare largesse know his team saved the world and voting for anyone else would be pure folly.

      Ed Balls as Chancellor would see an end to inequality, poverty, racism, discrimination, illiteracy, illness, homelessness, climate change, criminal activity debt and lies.


    • 276
      Audi Watch says:

      Was the Quattro in front on the road!

  36. 120
    Afghanistan Banana Stand says:

    When Snotty gave his announcement this morning, all his crap cabinet lined up with him.

    All I could think of was:


  37. 121
    Martin Day says:

    I’m asking you, the British people, for a mandate,” said Martin Day, flanked by his bloggers outside his official squat. “I’m not a team of one, as everybody can see I’m one of a team.”

    • 128
      Maladroit Labour Chump says:

      Can’t you get a woman date ??

    • 137
      restandbthankfull says:

      Do you mean a date with Mandy?

    • 172
      Anonymous says:

      Strange. Martin Day has been conspicuous by his absence from posting his LieBour cr*p on here; unless he has been hiding behind a different nom de plume. Methinks he had come to realise that which the majority of us knew long ago. NuLiebour are unwanted, finished, kaput, & long may that continue to be the case.

  38. 122
    restandbthankfull says:

    I Heard Laura Hoonsburg telling John Soapsuds that she saw a shredding van outside parliamentary offices – once she realised what she said she started back peddling like mad – oh! dear Laura you let the cat out of the bag there. I don’t suppose you will see that repeated on AlJaBeeba

  39. 124
    Sarah Brown says:



  40. 126
    Sarah Tweet says:

    On the train to Canterbury with my hero. Little hiccup on the way when he wet himself but he is all cleaned up now.

  41. 134
  42. 136
    marcus aurelius says:

    can we vote “Lord” Mandelson out? Or “Lady” Uddin?

    how about abolishing the House of Lords and creating an Imperial senate elected from UK, Australia, Canada amd NZ?

    • 138
      restandbthankfull says:

      Perhaps that could be part of the “wash up”.

    • 174
      J.Presclott ( five bellies, two Jags & two inches ) says:

      Fuck off !! I’ve just got me and Pauline ‘selected’ as the next intake into the House of Lords.

  43. 140
    I hate New Labour says:

    Ah, only a month then sweet release from the failed cyclops.

    All smiles today, but it won’t be long before the abject misery of his fate will be written all over his saggy grey face. It’s going to be great.

    People voted the Tories out in ’97 because they were fed up with them and the sleaze. But this lot are absolutely detested. Except for the 30% of benefit scroungers and employess in govt nonjobs.

  44. 141
    Women Know your place says:

    My missus just saw Magda and said “The state of her hair it needs washing”.

  45. 143
    Brown's a Tosser says:

    Clearly Rochester is full of fuckwits who shop at Morrisons. FFS these people must live in a glass bubble. Please Gordon come to my home town where I can guarantee you a really warm welcome. Molotoff cocktail anyone.

    • 160
      Adios El Gordo says:

      Sarah tweets

      just had a whunderful day in rocherster – everyone loved us, morrisons were fab and it was great to spend the lunchhour with the check out operatives – they perform such an important job in the community. gordon said he hadn’t had such fun in ages and i managed to use one of their staff discounts to pick up supper so i can cook a british roast. toodles x

    • 228
      Roger Daley says:

      Rochester ? Near Canterbury ain’t it ?

      Kill two birds and all that.

    • 265
      Peter Carter-Fuck says:

      Can’t afford the petrol mate.

  46. 147
    Pretty Please says:

    Can we make sure Brown is the last Scottish incompetent to ever sit as prime minister again.

    • 148
      I hate New Labour says:

      If we could also ban the perennially incompetent Labour party from ever holding office again I’d sign up for that.

    • 273
      McGroom says:

      We can’t be rid of them – they are everywhere

      The next front bench is likely to include Cameron, Osborne, Duncan, Strathclyde, McLoughlin and Mitchell.

      or a JV with Kennedy and Campbell

  47. 151
    bird wsb says:

    I can’t bear it. Gordon on bbc news chatting to supermarket workers. He has no social skill whatsoever, zilch, zero. He’ll lose more votes by meeting people than gain votes, and Sarah looks awkward and disengaged. Poor lass, what a life.

    • 284
      The Dirty Rat says:

      I like it when he interrupted a young lad having a cup of tea and asked what it was like to work there. The yoof said, “why. are you looking for a job?” Very prophetic.

    • 290
      Susie says:

      She only feels at home with celebrities. Anyone without a Anya Hindmarsh handbag is sooooo difficult to make small talk with.

      • 363
        Peter Carter-Fuck says:

        Did he ask them if they’d done any fornicating over the weekend?

      • 371
        grannysmith says:

        I notice she is alway’s with other women.

        • 443
          Proud Englishman says:

          A woman’s woman you mean?

          • Peter Carter-Fuck says:

            Grinning Gordon the Gaping Gargoyle is very much a man’s man, so it’s a marriage made in NuLabor heaven. Together with their turkey baster children they are the NuLabor ideal.

      • 479
        Tonto says:

        sarah doesn’t need a handbag she uses her gash

  48. 152
    Women Know your place says:

    Is it British Brown Day today on Pravda

    • 163
      streamfisher says:

      Today and every other day, so we should have 365 Brown days holiday a year.

  49. 154
    Adios El Gordo says:

    i have already laughed my socks off – gb can’t make polite chit chat to save his life – why he is stalking a load of women in morrisons and asking them such a load of crap? he is taking a lot of attention in the checkout supervisor role – perhaps one t apply fr after the cv?

    ” easter eggs were ppular were they?” – yes fuckwit it was easter.

    • 191
      Ben says:

      Incredible! Brown asked one women what she was going to do with a box of tampons. It’s now been cut from the sequence.

      • 207
        Adios El Gordo says:

        come on guido you need to have that clip – pure gold. it is going to be the funniest campaign ever – sarah brown looks bored already (i don’t blame her i would be).

        • 281
          restandbthankfull says:

          She’ll be out of breath running after El Gordo her hero if today is anything to go by – run Sarah run…..

      • 213
        ST says:

        Please tell me that’s true Ben. I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time.

      • 223
        streamfisher says:

      • 279
        The Dirty Rat says:

        He should have a good idea as he uses them two or three times a day to stop his arse from leaking.

      • 366
        Peter Carter-Fuck says:

        Why would Grim Gordon the Gay Gulper know about things for lady parts?

      • 519
        Peter Grimes says:

        He probably needed one to stop it all running out of his chuffer!

  50. 155
    QWERTY says:

    Is John Sopel drunk on the BBC?

    • 186
      brown bummers broadcasting corporation says:

      He’s drunk with lust for his beloved Gordon Brown.

    • 454
      Madme Defarge says:

      Now he’s always like that. I think he’s friendly with Charlie.

  51. 157
    bandersnatch says:

    Everybody’s sporting new haircuts for the campaign… Huhne has a silky floppy forlock, but hacks, spinners and also rans seem to favour crew cuts… I specially noted Charlie Whelan, Michael Gove (!) and and Andrew Pearce for the latter style.

    An amazingly sober and sombre collection of old farts and has-beens stood in a dumb row, like a wall, in Downing Street protecting the goal of No 11. Goalie Brown, absurdly grim, chose to stand out in front, face covered in corset-coloured pan-stick, and dully droned on (again about his varlues and middle class credentials… yawn) into a badly echoing mike. Sheesh! Expect the polls to widen!

    Cameron, looking like John Travolta about to break into a dance routine, wowed a clack of young and beautiful people standing in a courtyard at County Hall. They had obviously been drilled to clap in the right places. Diamond Dave pointed at Westminster across the river as if he were the leader of the Red Army about to storm the Winter Palace.

    Spose it depends which kind of staging you prefer…

  52. 161
    Martin Day says:

    On this momentous occasion am I the first to mention Lord Ashcroft and Unite in the same sentence?

  53. 164
    restandbthankfull says:

    Oh God. Jayne OvertheHill will be shadowing Gordon “I saved the world” Bruin for the next GHod only knows how many weeks. Yawwwwwwwn.

    Love the guy with the placard “7 million Irawis killed/injured/homeless ….” He is persistent isn’t he.

  54. 165
    ShoutsAtTheTV says:

    Ahhhh… That’s a really nice way of looking at the situation. The weight has lifted…

  55. 166
    restandbthankfull says:


  56. 176
    Agent 99 says:

    Admitted on BBC by LauraK that a shredding ‘van’ around at the governement offices

    Has the feel of Berlin 1945 about it .

    What next burning official papers and documents in the Government office fireplaces and whitehall courtyards?

    • 180
      streamfisher says:

      Only one?

    • 246
      stilyagi_air_corps says:

      Watch for smoke from rooftop incinerators. When you see partially-burned bits of documents floating down on the street, you know they’re panicking.

    • 274
      ...- ...- says:

      Interesting analogy particularly as 7th May 1945 was the day the Nazis surrendered to the Allied Armies….May 8th being proclaimed VE Day when the bells peeled throughout all of Britain in celebration. This should be the first act of an incoming Tory Administration……that every bell be rung throughout the country to signal the end of 13 years of Labour Tyranny…………………………………..

    • 313
      Anonymous says:

      That was a cue for a downfall video, come on give us it !

  57. 183
    Tony Blair is a Murdering Rapist says:

    Vote Gordon, Vote Labour. That’ll be £1m.

  58. 195
    English Liberation Front says:

    The simple, over-riding objective is to send this Scottish Government packing. Anything else can wait. It doesn’t matter what people may think of Cameron, getting rid of Brown has to take precedence.

    Vote Tory and send Scottish Labour back to Scotland!

    • 234
      Dimwit Liebourman says:

      There is actually no such party registered as “Scottish Labour”. It’s only a description of Labour. This type of false branding of a party should really be outlawed.

      Labour need add Scotland to the front to trick people into thinking it’s some sort of separate local entity, yet still bears the red English rose as their emblem.

    • 310
      English Liberating themselves from reality front. says:

      So there are I think 3 Scots in this Government, the rest are English and a south African. How does this square with your statement dumb boy. ?

  59. 200
    Upper class young Tory twerp says:

    William Hague http://www.williamhague.com. This domain name is not being renewed. email info@internexpert.co.uk.

    I wonder why ??

  60. 202
    Maladroit Labour Chump says:


    Figures published in Wednesday’s UK budget show that the UK’s contribution to the EU has increased from last year’s estimates. The 2009 budget estimated that the UK’s contribution for this year would be £5.6 billion. However, this figure has now increased to £6.4 billion and will rise to an estimated £7.6 billion in 2010/11. The £6.4 billion cost this year is more than twice the £3.1 billion the UK contributed last year.

    The increase is due to a reduction in Britain’s annual rebate, a portion which Tony Blair agreed to give away in 2005, in exchange for a ‘health check’ of the EU’s Common Agricultural Policy, which has produced no substantial effect in reducing the amount of EU money spent on subsidising agriculture. (Telegraph, 25 March)

    • 255
      Sir Everard Digby says:

      Tony Blair gave this up in return for actual reform of the CAP. Which has been deferred,unlike the reduction in our rebate.

      Thanks Labour.

  61. 203
    Moley says:

    Thought for the day.

    To what extent is the Tory Party going into the election, a Party that has been moulded entirely not by its supporters, not by the electorate, but by Labour’s criticisms and attacks?

    In the campaign the driving force should be the voice of the electorate and not Mandelson’s or Whelan’s carefully calculated attacks.

    Setting up a mechanism to ensure feedback from constituencies to campaign HQ on how campaign components are going down would be a useful step.
    The media, now more than ever, (especially the BBC), is categorically NOT the voice of the people.

    • 282
      Engineer says:

      That perhaps explains, in part, the rise of the internet as a significant force in politics. Bloggers are taken seriously by the main parties, and some candidates started as bloggers (good luck, Old Holborn). Perhaps the connection between people and parties is more direct through the blogs than through the filter of the broadcast and print media. (The limitation of blogging as a political force is, of course, that only a minority of people read, comment on or run blogs – so far.)

      • 492
        Noahs a Dude says:

        public traffic on the sites is still comparatively light though and thus difficult to gauge true influence

  62. 206
    I'm in to that kind of thing says:

    I would love to be a party leader and go around kissing grannies all day.

  63. 210
    Anonymous says:

    BBC: “Business Secretary Lord Mandelson admits Labour would have a “huge job” on its hands to continue rebuilding the economy if re-elected, but tells the BBC his party has “a team the public can have confidence in”.”

    So, after admitting that they’ve completely destroyed the economy, they expect us to trust them to fix it?

    Sorry, I forgot, the trillion pound debt and worst uk recession ever and 8million real unemployed was all the americans’ fault, silly me.

    • 216
      Adios El Gordo says:

      yes, a bit like me pushing gb over and then expecting a round of applause when i help him out.

      they are so arrogant and think we are so stupid.

    • 219
      Gordon ( SoldGoldAtThe ) BottomBrown says:

      Please do pay more attention to the BBC propaganda broadcasts which remind people every day that the dire state of the public finances is all the fault of those people in America.

      We are only responsible for anything that happens to go right; did you notice how the sun shone when I called the Election today ? I arranged that.

    • 229
      Gordon Brown says:

      But I burned more money than anyone else ever has before, increased demand, innit? I increased demand for notes ‘cos I needed to set light to tons of it. My economics teacher said that increasing demand was good.

      why is you dissin’ me? is it ‘cos I is a lying evil fuckwit?

    • 453
      Anonymous says:

      For British Empire read Gold, pension funds or surplus.

  64. 215
    Radio 5 for a New Labour Britain says:

    ….. and don’t forget our unrivalled polical coverage of the election …. we’ll have peter mandelson telling us how things are going everyday, there’ll be analysis of all things new labour from our expert team of derbyshite, bacon and allen and rigorous criticism of cameron, osborne and ashcroft all the time.

    ….. we’ll be spending lots of resources (your money) following our dear leader Gordon Brown around the country, so don’t forget to phone in or text us to say how well you think he’s doing.

    …. don’t forget this is your station providing balanced reporting and coverage of the new labour election victory on May 6th.

    …. what? did someone mention nick clegg? … never heard of him!

  65. 226
    The IMF is coming says:

    Would someone please take Sally Bercow’s phone and computer away.
    She is the most irritating non-entity twatter on politics home

  66. 230
    Chris Hoon says:

    I am Calamity Clegg’s best mate

    • 270
      Mr Plum says:

      Wouldn’t want to be on the battle bus after that.

      • 285
        Mr Plum says:

        They have just renamed the battle bus ‘The Deadwood Stage’

        • 319

          The ‘Coach of C*nts’.

          • Maladroit Labour Chump says:

            Cleggover looks a tad uncomfortable. Hoon lies easily, politician-style, gliding smoothly into attack-dog, bruiser mode…..

        • 397
          Susie says:

          And these people are in the same party?

          No wonder Labour want a hung parliament. Just imagine the chaos of another Lib/Lab pact! or should that be a Continuity Lib/Real Lib/Lib/Lab pact? Unbelievable.

  67. 231
    Penfold says:

    Yawn, wake in a months time, i’m orff to me gaff in Menorca.

  68. 238
    Anonymous says:

    A whole month of Brown going round to “public” places, where they’ve replaced all the normal people with card-carrying labour members.

    I hope he visits an army barracks and that everyone there point-blank refuses to shake his hand, and instead just all give him the finger.

    • 243
      Maladroit Labour Chump says:

      I’m still hoping Johnson Beharry VC knocks the Gorgon out.

      Would anyone actually arrest a real hero ??

    • 256
      I hate New Labour says:

      Maybe he could get the names wrong of some other serviceman that have died because of his phony war.

      Only for the Mirror and Guardian to excuse his appalling handwriting on the grounds that he’s disabled…

    • 259
      Rt Hon Bob Ainsworth MP says:

      I’m afraid that due to previously unforeseen security risks, all Army bases and installations are now on high alert, and the Prime Minister has no wish to interrupt our brave, not-at-all ill-equipped soldiers as they prepare for the security threat.

    • 306
      McGroom says:

      Does anybody know where Gordon will be in advance, so real (non planted) members of the electorate can ask about his record in office.

      No, of course you can’t know where he will be tomorrow or any other day, it is a matter of national security

      • 331
        Pensioner spreading marge on butty says:

        er trains run on tracks,that go from a to b,follow them on a map.

  69. 248
    Bob Frost says:

    First stop for Brown is Rochester, home of the Dickens Festival.

    As Micawber said ‘Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure nineteen nineteen six, result happiness. Annual income twenty pounds, annual expenditure twenty pounds ought and six, result misery. The blossom is blighted, the leaf is withered, the god of day goes down upon the dreary scene, and, in short, you are for ever floored. As I am!’

  70. 257
    Little Brown Jnr says:

    Stop picking on me dad

  71. 262
    Mitch says:

    How many primary schools can brown visit in a month? and has he been checked by the CRB?

  72. 264
    restandbthankfull says:

    I see Clarence “pinky” Mitchell is now in full time employment with ………
    the Conservative Party. Rethinking who I will vote for with this nut job working for the tories.

  73. 275
    Undecided Female Voter says:

    Why does the sight of Gordon Brown make my flesh crawl?

    • 300
      Sir William Waad says:

      It’s because you’ve seen blokes looking like him with their hands in their coat pockets, eyeing you up and dribbling slightly from the corner of their mouths.

  74. 278
    Margaret says:

    They’re off and running.

    The key things to watch our for in this election campaign;

    1. If elected would Gordon Brown serve a full term? Watch him avoid that question like the plague.

    2. Gordon Brown. How much will we actually see of him. Labour’s own private polling confirms that he is not a vote winner in marginal seats.

    3. Labour and Conservative spending plans – how clearly will these be set out? If Labour are not candid then the Conservatives won’t have to be either. Key battleground.

    4. LibDems – Cable has a higher media profile than Clegg.

    5. Conservatives need to gain 117 seats for a majority of 1.

  75. 292
    David says:

    Oh Gordon Brown no…. err, sorry Gordon Bennet No!

    Roll on election night to give us a rest from the earache that goes in between of pledges and broken promises… and door knocking when you are about to have a high tea on a low table or when that favorite soccer teams on telly!

    But don’t hold your socks yet… this guy could change like the wind and call it off – he did it once remember.

    And for the love of God, all those repeated hi-lights on telly, Brown said this and Cleggy said that… and Cameron hasn’t this or that.

    At least Novices, any novices would make this lot who supposed be called a Government look like nicompoops in a rat hole.

  76. 301
    Sarah Tweet says:

    Is on high speed train whizzing across Kent – fabulous day

  77. 303
    Sir William Waad says:

    Well, I’m all agog for the election and I can’t wait for the parties to put forward their, what d’you call ‘ems, things and the speeches of the leaders and the, um, that thing on telly, and….debates….and…..zzzzzzzzzzz

  78. 304
    Anonymous says:

    Good of Brown to remind us he is one of a team and not a team of one. In gordos head thats him shifting the blame. It also focusses our thoughts of the pepole in his team, Balls Mandleson, Cooper-Balls, Harman etc etc LOL !

    Cant fail with a team like that ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

    • 315
      Another Obama Beach Moment says:

      He also mangled his syntax in his speech at Downing Street calling the election when he said that he “wanted to renew the contract between THE people and those whom THEY( the people)are sworn to serve” instead of saying those whom are sworn to serve THEM(the people)The man can’t even get his election launch speech right.God rid us of this loon asap

      • 325
        The Dirty Rat says:

        Give him a little slack, he was on triple dose medication.

      • 339
        Resistance is futile, the state is God ! says:

        No he didnt mix up his syntax at all he said what he really thinks. Its another saving the world comment.

  79. 309
    Lord Mansion says:

    I have been ignored

  80. 311
    arthur says:

    in call me dave’s speech this morning did he say “the neglected rich”

    • 367
      Engineer says:


      The Beeb made a big fuss about his forgetting to mention gays, otherwise he covered just about every section of society you can think of, bar NuLab apparatchiks.

  81. 312
    The Dirty Rat says:

    When Brown walked out of number 10 this morning, did anyone else, like me feel like a huge boil on your arse had been lanced?

    • 317
      Charles Flaccidwidger says:

      Not until such time as he has been permanently ejected.

    • 318
      Sir William Waad says:

      I felt as though I had finished my ‘A’ Levels and at last left my Catholic boys’ school.

    • 341
      The Arse on the Boil of Noo_Lie_Bore says:

      Watch it!! – I’m festering nicely – and my reign will last for a thousand years.

      And the EUSSR Thought Police know where you live!

      • 466
        Anonymous says:

        Greenpeace know where I live too.

        I’m not afraid of those gobshites either.

  82. 321
    Anonymous says:

    If we shot an MP, every hour on the hour, up to the date of the election then we would get rid of the lot of them – remember these are the people who look after themselves, with our money, before anything else they do

  83. 323
    Archullus says:

    Labour’s new initiative to win back the trust of the public has had some trouble on its christening day. Having earned the unfortunate acronym WYGIWWT (What You Give Is What We Take), GB is having a hard look at his offering to ensure that politicians actually do something to earn public trust. Consequently a two part contract will be put to both politicians and public.
    The part that politicians will play in this is to ‘Demand Trust’.
    The part that the public will play is to ‘Supply Trust’.

    To ensure that this ‘demand for trust’ automatically converts into actual trust, public opinion will be monitored by means of surveys.

    Monitoring the supply of trust will be a vast enterprise in a nation of 60+m; to make this process efficient, sample populations will be used – extracted from the national ID database.

    The results of these surveys will be analysed to determine the level of public trust.

    Evidence of ‘lack of trust’ will be scrutinised to ensure that surveys are completed properly.

    If necessary more people will be surveyed until the right answer is arrived at. When all the right answers have been received, the result will be declared.

    People who do not fill in their surveys properly will have their particulars passed to the new, enlarged Department of (re-)Education to prevent any future Balls-Ups.

  84. 324
    Uncle Fester says:

    If we shot an MP, every hour on the hour, up to the date of the election then we would get rid of the lot of them – remember these are the people who look after themselves, with our money, before anything else they do

    • 335
      Resistance is futile, the state is God ! says:

      Ah but according to Gordon in his speech today these are also the people we are sworn to serve !

  85. 327
    pienomics says:

    The Traders Vote:

    After 13 years of waste, boom and bust on Pie Street, McBroon has to present himself for re-election of the Traders Association.

    Big Dave and his ledger clerk wee George are out early with a banner proclaiming ‘A vote for the Chipper is a vote for change. A vote for McBroons is a vote for the same old pies!’

    McBroon: ‘Right Willy that’s done……….I’ve just been to see wee Sadie at the Traders…….told her I was ready to go to the Street….’
    Willy: ‘Aye McBroon someone must have leaked your visit to see Sadie…..they bastards doon the Chipper unfurled a banner saying ‘ a vote for McBroons is a vote for the same old pies’…’
    McBroon: ‘Shut it wee man…..we’re not going to talk about the past……’
    Willy: ‘But McB you’re always saying the punters like the filling in your pies …that McBroons Pies haven’t changed for generations…..McB the punters want a change…’
    McBroon: ‘ Bugger the punters Willy….this election is about the future…..it’s about how McBroons Pie Shop will lead the High Street out of recession..?
    Willy: ‘ Aye McB…..but your Pie Bailout Scheme was a farce…….the punters don’t believe all your crap about the recession starting when the Yanks switched to pumpkin pies…….you cannae blame the Yanks..’
    McBroon: ‘The great Pie Recession started in America…..everyone knows that…..’
    Willy: ‘ But the boys doon the chipper are offering something ‘green’ and modern….that problem with the leaky roof over the pie shop was a real bummer..’
    McBroon: ‘ Careful son…..don’t ever mention that silly line about McBroons not fixing the roof when the sun was shining…’
    Willy: ‘ And what’s this idea of Toni and his soap box on the High Street…he should stick to his Rotary Club lunch tour….since he left the Traders he’s done nothing but make shed loads of money and buy repossessions……the punters don’t like that…’
    McBroon: ‘ Look you wee fat bastard…..the message is simple…..don’t talk about the past…..if anyone asks you what McBroons is doing about the filling just tell them that Cheekies is emptying the ocean of sole…..and that the wind turbine on the Chipper’s roof doesn’t have consent….’
    Willy: ‘Ok McB….are you getting that guy McBridie back to dig the dirt on Cheekies?’
    McBroon: ‘I’m phoning him right now!’

  86. 333
    Camerons got a mob too says:

    The fucking mob Gorgon has got with him is scaring people from asking the real questions like fiddling etc, lots of fucking CIA bastards acting as electoral advisers.

  87. 334
    The BBC (Brhoon's Bhenders 'n Cunts) says:

    Vote for Gorgon.

    We will.

    We want to preserve our cushy, pointless, and utterly despicable ‘numbers’.

    And pay your telly tax! We’ve got big pension pots to service.

  88. 336
    Tory Dan says:

    I see Gordon is planning the first of his ‘Tea with Broon’ appearances a Local Party Commisars datcha in Kent. Of course ordinary citizens have been invited to express their views and feelings to the Dear Leader.

    • 378
      Peter Carter-Fuck says:

      They’ll say anything for a plate of dog stew.

    • 383
      Justice Fingers says:

      Tell me, Mr Brown, have you repaid every penny that you have stolen from the taxpayer?

      • 414
        Gordon ( SoldGoldAtThe ) BottomBrown says:

        I have stopped giving Taxpayers’ money to my brother for cleaning the flat which the Taxpayers’ bought for me, yes.

  89. 340
    The Dirty Rat says:

    Now that Margaret Beckett will soon be without a job I am thinking of offering her a part time position of taking sperm from my pedigree male goats.
    She just has to look them in the eyes and give them a wank into a cup – she should be perfect.

    • 359
      Engineer says:

      You’ll have to supervise closely, or she’ll be trying to get sperm from the nanny goats.

    • 361
      Margaret Beckett says:

      Can I take that as a firm offer of employnent? Fire up the caravan!

    • 497
      BadgerSnatch says:

      she could take her caravan for more intimate soirees….3 balls extra 50p

  90. 345
    Sarah McTwatter says:

    Whilst we are whizzing through Kent do you think we could stop off in Canterbury for a bit ,Tweet, tweet.

  91. 349
    Roger Daley says:

    A good day to bury bad news … Baroness Scotland to appear as witness in “cleaner” trial.

    Illegal immigrant ‘lied to Attorney General to get job as her cleaner’
    Last updated at 1:59 PM on 06th April 2010

    Comments (0)
    Add to My Stories

    Court date: Baroness Scotland arrives at Downing Street this morning

    The former housekeeper of Attorney General Baroness Scotland lied to her in a bid to start work as her cleaner, a court heard today.

    Loloahi Tapui confessed to lying to Baroness Scotland by claiming she had mislaid her passport when she was first confronted by the Attorney General about allegations she had overstayed her visa in September last year, Southwark Crown Court in London heard.

    But the 27-year-old’s Tongan passport, which clearly showed she had overstayed her leave to remain in the UK by four years, was found by police on a bookshelf in the living room of her home in Sutton Court Road, Chiswick, west London.

    Duncan Penny, prosecuting, told the jury of eight men and four women: ‘When the defendant offered herself for employment in January 2009 the Crown alleges that she acted dishonestly, making a false representation that she was entitled to work in the UK.

    ‘When her true status came to light and she was confronted about her status by Baroness Scotland, the defendant admitted she lied during the application process about the whereabouts of her passport.’

    Baroness Scotland, the chief law officer for England and Wales, will be called as a prosecution witness later today and asked to be referred to as Patricia Mawhinney.

    She was fined £5,000 in September last year for failing to keep a copy of the documents which Tapui provided to show she was entitled to work in the UK when she applied for the cleaner’s job, the court heard.

    Battle for Downing Street begins as Brown fires starting gun for May 6 election

    Tapui admits possessing a passport with a counterfeit visa stamp between June 7 2006 and September 19 2009, but denies using it to establish facts about herself and earn money.

    Overstayed: Loloahi Tapui

    The false stamp purported to be issued on September 12 2005 and claimed she had been granted leave to remain in the UK on certain conditions until September 12 2008.

    Tapui denies intending to use the false identity document ‘for establishing, ascertaining or verifying registrable facts about herself’, including her ‘identity and residential status’.

    She also denies fraud by dishonestly making a false representation that she was entitled to work in the UK.

    The trial, which is expected to last three to four days, started moments after Prime Minister Gordon Brown announced the General Election will take place on May 6.

    Judge Nicholas Loraine-Smith warned the jury to try the case on the evidence before them and to ignore any press reports.

    • 365
      Dave Blunkett says:

      If only she had asked me for advice
      OOp in Yorkshire we know how to get a visa for T’nanny
      speshly if thee art shagging T’ Boss of T’ nanny

  92. 350
    tory boys never grow up says:

    Oh well it may or may not have convinced a single person to change their vote. So much for cutting out waste and inefficiency, it clearly doesn’t apply to political campaigning.

  93. 351
    Rainham says:

    Gordons Joe the plumber moment

    • 380
      Peter Carter-Fuck says:

      The IRS destroyed him. The NuLabor Crime Family will destroy anyone to hold onto power. It is the right thing to do.

  94. 354
    Engineer says:

    Brown and Balls were in conference about their election tactics.

    “It’s no good, Boss” said Balls, “We’re wiped out down south. We’ve got to go north. That’s where the votes are.”

    “Maybe aye, but how do we appeal to the popular vote?” asked Gordon.

    “Easy. We take a dog. They like whippets and things up north.” said Balls.

    Well, they couldn’t find a whippet, so in desperation, they sneaked up behind David Blunkett and nicked his labrador. Then scarpered for a train to the north, before he noticed.

    Arriving in Balls’ constituency, Brown asked, “Now where?” Not wanting to admit that he hadn’t a clue, having seldom been there, Balls looked about, and spying a large pub opposite the station, he said, “In there. We can grab a bite of lunch.”

    So they find the lounge bar, order a lunch and a drink, and demand two receipts. They are just tucking in, when the door to the public bar bangs open, and a local walks in. He looks about, sees the dog, and approaches. Without addressing either man, he lifts the dog’s tail, peers underneath, then leaves again, shaking his head and muttering. Brown and Balls are not sure what to do – is this some strange northern custom?

    A minute later, the public bar door bangs open again, and another local appears. Exactly the same thing happens – he lifts the dog’s tail, peers underneath, and leaves, muttering and shaking his head. Brown and Balls look at one another, perplexed.

    A couple of minutes pass, and the public bar door bangs open again. Another local, flat-capped and scowling, approaches. This time, Balls stops him. “Er, look, we know what you’re going to do, but why?”

    The local looks at him, unsmilingly, then says, “Bloke in t’other bar reckons there’s a dog in ‘ere with two arseholes.”

  95. 356
    tory boys never grow up says:

    Any prize for spotting the first Obama crib of the campaign – Hope, Optimism and Change from Mr Liightweight (2nd crib).

  96. 358
    max says:

    Sky showing a chat with the 3 main candidates in Waverly. The Tory guy was a complete swivel-eyed lisping loon in a sheepskin coat. And that’s a seat they need to win. Cut to Gord ‘meeting the people’ by turning up at a party workers’ semi somewhere in Kent. Sarah’s face when presented with the unemployed looking tubba mongo son that was just a hockey mask away from slasher movie central casting. get me my popcorn! This is just hilarious…

  97. 360
    Must get a pseudonym one day says:

    Meester Brown, Sahib – is it now that you want me to put all these pre-filled Postal Vote forms into the random post-boxes around Bradford ?

    Please tell me, Sahib, because I got so little spare time now between collecting all the benefits, selling the heroin, keeping an eye on my ‘girls’, arranging the crash-for-cash insurance claims, fixing the passports for my relatives, breeding some more, stirring up the local mosque and packing all these IEDs to send for OUR boys in Afghanistan. Plenty good job I don’t need to work in Britain – too f*cking busy, Sahib.

    And another thing, Sahib, I hopes you’s not forgotten that peerage you promised me, and all the Gujerati Gang.

  98. 362
    tory boys never grow up says:

    Perhaps they are his family?

  99. 364
    The Dirty Rat says:

    Re the Labour abolition of the 10p tax rate.
    Frank Field MP says on his blog:

    On 7th July 2009, Frank tabled a motion to the Budget saying that it cannot be passed until the 10p losers have been compensated. This amendment was defeated by the Government and brings Frank’s two-year campaign on the issue to a close. Labour has made a clear gesture away from what many believe to be the issue at its heart, protecting and advancing the interests of those who have the least in life.

    That is from a (Honourable) Labour MP – in my opinion the only one.

    • 374
      Fat Bloke on Tour says:

      Rotten Rodent

      Oh for the days when 20% was the discount rate of tax.
      Away and grow up and take that Birkenhead party boy with you.

      Ego trip looking for a cause.
      He will fit in with Clan Cameron’s takeover of the Tory party.

  100. 371
    The reasons people decide who to vote for says:

    Cleggs cameraman never shows the kid asking the question so he’s off my vote possible list.

  101. 373
    max says:

    Now Cleggy’s getting ripped a new one by a bunch of hand-picked student-types. “Given you have no prospect ever of forming the next Government, why do you maintain that a vote for the Liberal Democrats is anything other than wasted?” Three second silence. Bueller? Anyone? Hahahaha. Oh, my stomach’s hurting.

    • 393
      The universal truth of this election says:

      In 2005 everyone knew that the Tories had no chance of being elected and people who didn’t wish to vote Labour and were also against the Iraq War voted LibDem…hence their reasonable showing in the polls and the fact they captured Tory strongholds like Solihull a typically long standing Tory seat.In 2010 things have altered…the Tories ARE electable and you will find that ex-Tory seats that went LibDem in 2005 will revert to Tory this time around.Taking into account people’s antipathy to Brown it’s likely that LibDems who think they are the kingmakers in a “Hung parliament” like the commentators will find that Cameron romps home with 30 seat majority. As the student said …a vote for LibDem is a totally wasted vote and will allow Labour and Brown to retain power

      • 399
        Thats News says:

        Unless the Labour voters in those areas leave Labour in droves and vote Lid Dem?

        That might mean the loss of former Tories back to the Tory party might not be enough to keep the lib Dems out. But it would keep Labour out.

  102. 385
    Don't_Mention_Immigration_to the Lib_Flabs says:

    Sky are staying with Cleggie talking to some young people……….

    Will any one of them dare to ask him about immigration – one of them ought to since they hold the greatest proportion of unemployed or on micky mouse work schemes….

    Oh…. they have just cut him off….(surpise!)

  103. 386
    Peter Carter-Fuck says:

    Strange that we don’t have enough helicopters in Afghanistan, but the Beeb never has a problem getting one to film completely boring and futile shots of a car driving through central London.

  104. 387
    EasyJet says:

    Stop Press: Women tried to get dead body on EasyJet flight in Liverpool. Police confirm that the dead body is not the expiring Prime Minister.

  105. 388
    Kiss My Big Hairy Swingers says:

    I saw that – a load of (mostly) poorly delivered, planted questions from spotty kids – who cares!

  106. 389
    The Purple Party says:

    Vote for us we are the combined labour and conservative. And like them we will promise to give but will take.

  107. 390
    Engineer says:

    Transport for the main party leaders so far:

    Cameron = Audi Quattro.

    Clegg = Battle Bus.

    Brown = Cheap off-peak saver (standard class) to Rochester.

    Hmmm….think the Tories have the lead on this one, so far.

    • 420
      Fat Bloke on Tour says:

      Thick Civil

      Scratchy = Clapped out 80′s has been left behind in all areas including safety, emissions and economy.

      After saying that I was hoping he is riding the car and not Thatch’s legacy.

      Cleggy = Sensible piece of public transport.

      GB = Modern, economical, efficient, the way of the future.

      Consequently please keep your expertise to things you understand, immobile lumps of concrete built with lots of sweat and little intellect.

      • 426
        Can't remember my moniker says:

        GB? economical? Only with the truth. Otherwise, he cost us £1bn every 3 minutes to run ……….

        Aren’t you appearing in Beijing tomoroow? Goodbye!!!!!

        • 440
          Fat Bloke on Tour says:

          I can — You are Terry Fuckwit

          Away an’ bile yer heid ya rocket.
          You have a full on bout of selective amnesia.

          Scratchy is Ted Heath without the talent.
          Techno babble dressed up as a political strategy.

          Big society my arse, it would be a return to the parish and a lot of nosy intrusive middle class busy bodies patronising the working class.

          • Waiter says:

            Would sir like a little salt and vinegar for the chip on sir’s shoulder?

          • Or perhaps,

            A waffer theen meent.

          • The Enforcer says:

            how about a good old fashioned smack in the mouth blubbertits

          • Fat Bloke on Tour says:

            Reinforced Concrete

            Keyboard hardman I take it.
            You are as hard as my last shite and that was skitters.
            Consequently away and crawl back to whichever rock you call home.

            For the petrolheads amongst the Spunky Spunky faithful, the Audi Quattro analogy suits Scratchy down to the ground, poncified VW Iltis tarted up for middle class audiences.

            Real men would go for a Lancia Delta HF Integrale while there is always the Talbot Sunbeam Lotus for the “Buddies” amongst us.

  108. 391
    Lord Prescott of Lard says:

    We fucked the country right up…..changed the boundaries so we will always have the advantage. We created a society where the useless and lazy (burp) vote for us and a corrupt civil service.

    Yor the idiots that pay us, so yea vote for the blues……and lose!

  109. 392
    Lizzie says:

    Cleggs Britain, rehabilitate the prisoners and shoot the bankers, perfect world! unfortunately not Britain today, Clegg needs to take off the “rose tinted Liberal glasses”

  110. 402

    It’s highly unlikely that Brown will call a general election this year. There’s just no point. Politics is so last season

  111. 403
    Boxer says:

    He showed up in Derby and made a dick of himself in my gym. Punched a speedbag and it came back and hit him in the face.

  112. 405
    Electrician says:

    Cable looks like he’s been on charge to long

  113. 409
  114. 423
    • 439
      Enochs Boys says:

      and we are pissed enough to give Enoch his night

    • 447
      A Calm Dispassionate Englishman says:

      There will now follow a prolonged, embarrassing silence as all those who are in agreement carefully look over their shoulders to ensure no-one’s waiting to check their reaction and instantaneously slam them with the ‘Card’.

  115. 424
    The Dirty Rat says:

    There will be lots of banana skins during the next month but please god let Brown beat this one. It would be quite good if it featured an articulated lorry in place of the sea.

  116. 429
    Anonymous says:

    I truly hope the liblabcons enjoy this election to the full. After all, it is the very last time they can be absolutely sure they will win.

    The pain that will be involved in the arrest, painful punishment, and way more painful execution of these treasonous cυnts will be all the more delicious following their ‘triumph’ in this ‘contest’.

  117. 433
    Kiss My Big Hairy Swingers says:

    STOP PRESS – BBC says Prime Mentalists spends time in Kent being loved up by floating voters, i.e. community leaders, members of a muslim charity etc. Am I alone in thinking that anyone that would be described as a “community leader” obviously votes labour? Surely it’s typical of the PC lexicon shit that we’ve had rammed down our throat in the past 13 years!

    • 451
      QWERTY says:

      He’s been to places where no fucker wants to work. Shitholes like Chatham and Rochester are full of scum, they make the Isle of Sheppey look upmarket.

    • 478
      Susie says:

      Which community does he lead?

      We never used to need community leaders, they were whoever the MP was. Just goes to show how fragmented out society has become — or in other words, broken.

  118. 437
    Susie says:

    Anyone else noticing the scroll bar’s gone haywire on this site?

  119. 438
    The Sleeper says:

    Slapometer on Pravda….hahahahahaha

  120. 444
    Dick Robinson says:

    Anyone else find it fitting that Gorgon begins the campaign trail in Rochester?

  121. 446
    QWERTY says:

    Just given the one eyed mong another 500+ slaps. Very enjoyable.


  122. 449
    Abandon Hope says:

    The whole system is finished. Give up now before we have to hang you all.

  123. 452
    I am not gay but I want to stay there says:

    Re: Grayling

    Brighton is a world-famous year-round seaside resort, as well as a city with history and elegance.

    It is one of the most culturally diverse cities in the UK: it celebrates its ethnic mix and variety of different lifestyles, and is proud of having the largest lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender community outside London


  124. 455
    I'm the Heir to Blair Tony Cameron (hear my soundbites roar!) says:

    Dave Blair hits the Election Campaign trail.

    • 463
      Down wiv Brown! says:

      but dats not alister campewl ?? ees an old bloke ??? wots going on ???

  125. 459
    jgm2 says:

    If you were wondering about the kind of mindset that informs the fuckwittistas that vote Labour then this is an example to cherish from HYS…

    486. At 1:28pm on 06 Apr 2010, smiley_koala wrote:

    I will not be voting Tory for several reasons, but the key ones are:
    a)they want to bring back fox hunting- possibly one of the most barbaric ‘sports’ imaginable

    Another fuck-muppet who will overlook Blair and Browns lunatic war in Iraq which has killed more Iraqis than there are foxes living in the UK. Dead people? Bothered? Bothered? Do I look bothered? Dead foxes?

    It’s all a question of priorities to these jackasses.

    • 490
      Fox is fox. says:

      • 509
        Axe The Telly Tax says:

        Foxes are vermin. They carry virulent diseases such as rabies. They will kill young lambs and kill a whole coup of chickens and only carry one off. They should be terminated wth extreme predjudice.

    • 500
      brownless says:

      wheres my fucking horse when I need it I’ll get the bastard..tentpegging that chin grinner will be a personal pleasure

  126. 467
    A rentboy says:

    Anyone want to stick it up my bum

  127. 470
    Media decide to piss off the public says:

    the media certainly have it in for politicians because if they keep up this wall to wall clusterfuck coverage of them like today for four weeks solid the public will be ready to shoot all politicians on sight never mind vote for any of them
    Project Overkill is underway

  128. 474
    Statsman says:

    Assume that the voting intentions of people are random and independent and that 30% of people aim to vote labour.
    Then according to the Poisson distribution, the probability of Brown meeting 10 consecutive labour supporters is about 1 in a thousand. Raise that to 20 consecutives and the probability goes to 3 in a million.

    • 484
      jgm2 says:

      What does Poisson have to say about several coachloads of ‘spontaneous’ supporters arriving ahead of the Maximum Imbecile at every photo location?

      There was a joke that Thatch didn’t believe there was any congestion in London because she wafted in every day in a ministerial convoy. Likewise I think it is fair to speculate that the Maximum Imbecile doesn’t realise that the affection in which he is held by ordinary members of the public that throng him at all these ‘spontaneous’ events is nothing but a big hoax to keep negative images off the TV.

  129. 477
    Gay Gordon says:

    I’m busy in Rochester at the momemt. Can you come round tonight while Sarah’s tweeting?

    • 502
      RimmersRus says:

      sarah’s new extra large strap-on is ready to be collected if you can slip out later after the long day…only got the black one but as you’re semi blind already and are never looking that way don’t worry….but brace yourself gordo brace yourself there could a ‘chin changer’ moment coming up.

      • 503
        RimmersRus says:

        ps….tell peter his muzzle is ready aswell but the donkey dick he wanted is being extended to reach the parts a mallet can’t get to….don’t cross him gordo hes close to going over the edge…disloyal…insincere….double talking…evasive about 5 years…watch your back hes lurking …..waiting……..yearning…….the crown….within his grasp…your crown gordo.

  130. 505
    codebreaker says:

    whats your play on the day Nell ?

  131. 513
    Me Me Me says:

    looks like the Mad moderator has fooked this thread up somewhat.

    PS if you Asians do get caught wheeling a dead dude thru the airport then just own up.

  132. 523
    Bill Caxton says:

    Westminster Woes
    Clearly our political elite
    Has lost touch with the man in the street,
    With expenses spent on moats and mounds
    A shocking waste of taxpayers pounds.
    The ratepayers do not see it funny
    This squandering of public money,
    While they have been busy flipping homes
    Did we also pay for garden gnomes ?
    An unnecessary expense to reimburse
    All paid for from the public purse.
    Be they egalitarian or toff ?
    Their snouts are buried deeply in the trough,
    Last elections’ large majority
    May now be lost to the B.N.P.
    What Mick of Gorbals failed to see
    They acted so dishonestly,
    Dear politician you should fear
    For your seat this election year.

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Cathy Jamieson MP, Labour’s Shadow Treasury minister, commenting on Treasury analysis of the economic impact of tax changes…

“If the Treasury is looking at the economic impact of tax changes, then surely it should examine the impact of the rise in VAT and cuts to tax credits? George Osborne’s £12 billion VAT rise knocked confidence, helped to choke off the recovery and has cost families £1,350 over the last three years.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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