April 1st, 2010

Statistics Boss : Stop Lying Mr Brown

It takes something for a civil servant to write publicly to the PM admonishing him for lying.  Could it be that three lies this month based on twisted statistics were just too much for the offical charged with counting the beans.

The Lies of March:

  • “Some people talk as if net inward migration is rising. In fact, it is falling..”
  • This lie drove Michael Scholar at the ONS to protest (above) at Brown’s corruption of the integrity of the statistics.
  • “We have shown our commitment to our armed forces by increasing expenditure on them every year…”
  • In real terms expenditure went down and he had to apologise to parliament for this lie.
  • “Everyone now has a clear right to see their neighbourhood policing team spending 80% of their time on the beat”
  • The Advertising Standards Authority banned a government advertising campaign from going ahead using the same claim because it was misleading.

Gordon pathologically lies with numbers all the time, he constantly reels off fudged statistics whenever he is questioned.  Crime statistics are massaged and worst of all the government’s real debt position is hidden using PFI and by ignoring public sector pension obligations. When the Tories get in one of the first things they should do is restate the national debt to honestly reflect the dire truth of the position hidden by Gordon’s years of deceit…

Hat-tip : C4 News Fact Check


  1. 1

  2. 2
    משאבת בטון says:

    I heard on the news this am that some people have received their polling cards, for May 6th.

  3. 3
    Sue Denim says:

    Can we even trust his Tractor Production statistics?

  4. 4
    jgm2 says:

    Net migration is a wilful fudge in any case. What the indigenous population really want to know is how many Somalis, St*nis, Nigerians and suchlike economic migrants have blown in to the point where London now resembles Khartoum.

    The over all ‘net’ figures are only lower than 1997 (if that is true) because back then there weren’t so many folk quitting work or retiring and fleeing the UK in horror at what is happeninghere.

    Another lot of economic migrants you might say. Or white flight as I believe it’s called in the US.

  5. 5
    simon says:

    Not only a revision of the deficit totalis needed; but the civil servants conniving with Brown about lying regarding said totals require sacking.

  6. 6
    jgm2 says:

    Local elections probably.

    Still June 3rd for my money. Or later.

  7. 7
    Gobshite Brown says:

    Look into my eye. You can trust me.

  8. 8
    jgm2 says:

    Plus everybody at the treasury that cannot provide written proof that they objected to Brown’s risible economic projections all through the period 1997 – 2007.

  9. 9
    David Cameron says:

    Ghastly Piece of Filth

  10. 10
    astateofdenmark says:

    Restating debt to GDP to a believable number would be a good start. I would suggest using the Maastricht definition as 1) it has to be reported anyway and 2) it can’t be fiddled.

  11. 11
    bergen says:

    That speech yesterday confirms my long held belief that Brown isn’t very bright.He’s dug himself a deep hole on a subject that he needs to avoid if he wants to hang on.I suppose he never expected to be called out on his lies by the Civil Service.

  12. 12
    Anonymous says:

    Still nothing about purcell – is labour managing to keep this all under wraps ?

    Sure looks like it .

  13. 13
    Peter Grimes says:

    Lying is what Brown does for a living; he is very good at it!

    I feared that the liar Brown would bring up immigration as he would do anything to secure the next GE, but at least the Tories can attack him now with vigour without fear of the ‘racist’ taunt.

  14. 14
    John Cipher says:

    If we let him in again we will be as a nation of Tracy Temples – giving ourselves to an ill equipped vile fat oaf.

  15. 15
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    Will the tories DARE to reveal the true financial situation?

    I doubt it. It will freak out the populace, spook the markets and induce mass emigration. Politicians and truth are not happy bedfellows.

  16. 16
    amongomous says:

    If he was good at it we wouldn’t know about it.
    He’s an allround useless article.

  17. 17
    global warming my arse says:

    No one I know believes a word that comes from any politicians mouth. They don’t know how to tell the truth and they don’t know what the truth is.

    I would not believe one of them if they were telling me the time and looking at their watch.

    They can’t even lie straight in bed – the bastards.

  18. 18
    Peter Grimes says:

    4 Correct.
    When you consider that about 4 million self-supporting, likely Tory voters have left the UK over the last 13 years to be replaced by a likely similar amount of low-earning at best and fully state-reliant benefit recipients at worst, it is clear that the UK has changed radically. All to McDoom’s benefit, of course, and to the detriment of the UK’s economic performance!

    The oft-used (and abused by McDoom) debt to GDP measure is another fudge, too. We should measure debt and deficit against government revenues not against the whole economy. One pound in four of current spending is financed by borrowing.

  19. 19
    amongomous says:

    I’ve just shuddered and vomited into my brekky.

  20. 20
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    I will try a 3rd time

  21. 21
    Porky Pickles says:

    Who ate all the Pies ?

  22. 22
    Rip Van Winkle says:

    Well the media has NEVER called him out on his lies for 13 year bloody years. ALL the media – not one radio or TV station. Why would you possibly think they would now? Even his own employees can’t sit there and take it any more but the media can.

    Someone needs to call him a liar to his face. And let the people see his response.

  23. 23
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    Mr global warming my arse seems to have said it.

    The truth could upset alot of people, most especially the financial markets!

    Hardly likely.

  24. 24
    Rip Van Winkle says:

    But he’s NOT good at it. He’s allowed to be good at it by a super compliant and suppoting media. Don’t blame Brown or any of the Labour shits in office. The blame lies with the media – they’ve allowed it to happen and look what it’s done to our democracy.

    Fourth estate, my backside.

  25. 25
    Sir Reginald Titbrain says:

    Its been said before but is worth repeating now and again to keep a grasp of the character of those we are led by.

    What is important to New Labour is that the message be delivered at all costs. Lies, deceptions and subterfuge are all there to be used to this end and to be caught out involves no shame and calls for nothing more than a grudgingly feeble apology. Truth is entirely incidental to this process, and is to be regarded as a bonus.

    Look at this sort of behaviour in a family context; the family wouldn’t work, would it? And with this crew at the helm it is not surprising that the country is in pitiful state that it is.

    Take education as an example. Quite simply it’s not what one would wish, especially with the PM’s desire for a high tech. future capable of taking on the Indians and Chinese [stop sniggering at the back]. But according to this spin obsessed bunch of losers it’s all top notch and on the up, so we’ll all be OK.

  26. 26
    Engineer says:


    The only thing that would surprise anybody would be McRuin using statistics that turned out, on examination, to be straight and accurate. His sole motive in using statistics is political advantage; good governance for the country is something he stopped bothering about long ago.

  27. 27
    BoBo says:

    “When the Tories get in one of the first things they should do is restate the national debt to honestly reflect the dire truth of the position hidden by Gordon’s years of deceit…”

    Throw open the doors and let the light in!
    Clear and transparent Government from day one…
    It’s the only way to fight all the lies.

  28. 28
    Ed Balls, Corgi Registered says:

    Oh dear Mr Scholar you really have brought your career in the civil service to an ignominious end.

    Please ensure your desk is cleared early on May 7th or prepare to be bullied, smeared and briefed against, before you are humiliated and dismissed.

  29. 29
    gj says:

    Walking around London, particularly the Oxford Street area, you never hear English being spoken in the street!
    McBroon of Mong has no idea of what’s going on with immigration. The bollocking by a civil servant just proves that.

  30. 30
    Sir Reginald Titbrain says:

    This comment was awaiting moderation. Anybody tell me why? Or is it simply that Guido has nipped out for a slash and turned something automatic on?

  31. 31
    Engineer says:

    If at first you don’t succeed, pack it in and do something more useful.

  32. 32
    jgm2 says:

    Interestingly I suppose you could argue that this civil servant is making a bid to be kept on by Cameron after June 3rd.

    Since the ONS has obviously been simply used as a generator of bogus statistics since 1997 it stands to reason that there will be mass firings of those complicit in the Brownian economic and social clusterfuck.

  33. 33
    Engineer says:

    They’ll have to find all the hidden debts first; that might take some doing, unless the Civil Service is so sick of what it’s currently being asked to do, it fesses up with relief.

  34. 34
    Alton Towers says:

    Have you seen our new roller coaster at the Olympics?

  35. 35
    Odds Bodkins says:

    Y’see in the bad old days, Brown would no doubt have gotten someone like McBride to do the dirty on Sir Michael Scholar, or anyone else who would have dared question Browns methods.

  36. 36
    Mr Ned says:

    Correct, people are forgetting or overlooking the local elections which are set for May 6th too.

    As for the election, I am not sure that it will happen so soon jgm2. It may not happen until the Army restores order after the civil war.

  37. 37
    Dom Fisher says:

    When the Tories get in one of the first things they should do is restate the national debt to honestly reflect the dire truth of the position hidden by Gordon’s years of deceit.


  38. 38
    Sir William Waad says:

    I would like some of the UK’s mathematicians to get together and form an Office of Honest Statistics. This could deconstruct offical fudged statistics and provide instant comments on the use of figures to mislead, whether by Government, Opposition, pressure groups, lobbyists or advertisers.

  39. 39
    Whiff Whaff says:

    You mean Boris’s strange looking erection?
    There’s probably a whole gaggle of fillies who have seen that.

  40. 40
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    I dont view London as a English or British city. I feel totally ill at ease there its not the place i used to visit when I was growing up. The only English county left is sussex!

  41. 41
    Anonymous says:

    “When the Tories get in one of the first things they should do is restate the national debt to honestly reflect the dire truth of the position hidden by Gordon’s years of deceit…”

    Your joking? Stupidest suggestion all morning. Thats what the new Greek government did and look where it got them.

  42. 42
    backwoodsman says:

    Well, it won’t be ‘Toenails’ robinson, or any other of the fearless beeboid seekers after the truth !
    It really hurt them this morning, having to report through gritted teeth that certain (obviously dodgy), business leaders were reportedy not wholly supportive of the Dear Leaders plan to increase NI tax.

  43. 43
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    Do you think the Tories will dare to reveal that the aliens have landed and have Lizard heads. They may quake at such things in Belgium but im sure call me Dave is made of sterner stuff!

  44. 44
    Sir William Waad says:

    It looks fun. I worry that it will cost a lot to maintain – can it pay for itself by attracting visitors, like the Eiffel Tower?

  45. 45

    Socialism doesn’t work, so lies and threats and genocide is all they can do.

    For instance, look at this story in the Guardian this morning: http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2010/apr/01/labour-gordon-brown-hard-man

    These people are monsters.

    Although, I wouldnt’ be suprised if the policy was scrapped by 12 noon

  46. 46
    jgm2 says:

    The thing with Brown is that often he will be using very precise language to convey his lie. He’ll be giving the impression of saying one thing but knowingly saying an entirely different thing.

    There is a recent case in point. Brown (apparently) wanted to reassure the voters that police in the community would spend 80% of their time on patrol. Now that is clearly designed to give the impression that police spend 80% of their time on patrol. Which makes sense. There’ll be a few adminstrator types, Chief Officers etc who do paperwork but yeah. Police spending 80% of their time on patrol seems about right.

    Except the key qualifier was ‘community’. You see ‘community’ police are very specifically designated class of police. they’re the ones designated to be on patrol. The 20K out of 150K who are actually supposed to be walking around deterring crime and directing you to ‘Brook Crescent’ ‘cos you’re new to the area.

    The other 130K of the fuckers? They’re the ones who only appear when there’s a bunch of protesters who need ‘kettling’. Otherwise they’re sitting with their feet up fielding calls from burgled properties and issuing you with a crime number for your insurance claim.

    But Brown’s clear intention is to mislead that all 150K of the fuckers are out and about. Stalking the streets, keeping ‘em safe.

    He is normally a very thorough liar and he knows and the MSM knows that if you start to pick his lies apart the average voters eyes glaze over as their attention span is exceeded.

    Lately though he has become, like Blair, completely pathological in his lying so it’s much easier to make the case to the public.

  47. 47
  48. 48
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    Try telling that to McDoom hed hit you with his clunking fist!

  49. 49
    Hang The Bastards says:

    Lying untrustworthy bong-eyed bastard

  50. 50
    jgm2 says:

    Never fear. By tomorrow morning Brown will have arm-twisted 40 ‘business leaders’ to write an open letter to the Times supporting his imbecile policies.

  51. 51
    The Dirty Rat says:

    The old saying, ‘Bullshit baffles brains’ just doesn’t wash when the bullshitter is a busted flush like Brown and NL.

    I really do hope that he is attacked on this and accused of lying , or is that not a gentlemanly thing to do in public.

  52. 52
    Anyone but Labour says:

    I have thought for a while that the Tories should forensically dissect Browns tractor stats and ram them back down where they came from.
    He consistantly comes up with figures which to me, appear made up on the spot. To challenge his figures of course needs a thorough knowledge of the stats themselves and a knowledge of where the information is held.
    Ideally Cameron would be able to spear Brown at the ‘Leaders debates’ , he may not be able to pin him down at the time but he can raise the issue for the following day when the media can do the damage.

    One stat which I don’t think is fully understood, is the ‘halving of the deficit in four years’, which doesn’t sound too bad. This halving, applies to halving the borrowing and not the deficit. The deficit will still be rising for many years. The country need to see some real figures, the word ‘billion’ flows like water at the moment and means not a lot, borrowing £500m a day I think has more affect. Let us know how much interest a day we are paying and what this will peak at.
    Keep plugging away and relate it to real people, not just made up tractor stats.

  53. 53
    Sir Reginald Titbrain says:

    I should give it a wide berth in case bits fall off.

  54. 54
    Hang The Bastards says:

    Actually I think it is very believable.

  55. 55
    Moley says:

    I cancelled my postal vote last year because I no longer trusted the system.

    The council has just sent me a local election postal vote polling card for May 6th.

    I will try and cancel the postal vote again.

    Postal votes are like credit cards used to be; everybody seems to want you to have one.

  56. 56
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    The biggest lie of all is that of saying that the Lisbon Treaty is not the same as the EU Constitution. On that basis Brown avoided what was his most significant political pledge. A true whopper of a lie!! Yet not one body is authorative enough to stand up and call the PM a complete liar! You may argur over statistics, you cant deny that 99% of the text of Lisbon is the same as the EU constitution.

  57. 57
    Shocked of Sheen says:

    What’s the date today?

  58. 58
    Sir William Waad says:

    I hear that the unfortunate Mr Purcell has fallen down something called a ‘K-Hole’ and can’t get out. Guido’s less rustic readers might be able to explain where in Glasgow this ‘K-Hole’ is and why it hasn’t been repaired.

  59. 59
    Don't believe a word they tell you says:

    They have been deceitful about immigration figures for years. For example, counting people into the country (asylum cases) where they just counted the head of household in and ignored the rest of the family, but counted everybody (i.e. whole family) out to make the figures look good.

    Brown and his party know exactly what they are doing, they just tell the public at large a different thing to keep them happy. Immigration in itself should be a positive thing when controlled properly, but this government has changed the face of Britain for good and they meant to do that, as was recently revealed.

  60. 60
    Sir Reginald Titbrain says:

    Look at the date Frank, then go back to bed.

  61. 61
    John Prescott says:

    See, I told you Pauline, I’m a legend, a class warrior and a legend.

  62. 62
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    Yeah I get that all the time. Particuarly when I say something non-controversial, its a mystery to which we demand an answer.

  63. 63
    A Pensioner says:

    Its not numbers (ie net migration) that counts its the quality of the resultant population. Hard for the ONS to measure, but it wouldnt take a statistical genius to figure out that the shits coming in and the good stuff is going out.

    Net result: destruction of the English way of life, crime, etc..

  64. 64
    I'm not a violent man but... says:

    Give me ten minutes in a locked room with him.

  65. 65
    jgm2 says:

    I was looking for a computer part in Crawley a few months ago and ended up being directed to some local shopping precinct. Anyway I parked up opposite a school and it was (as it turned out) fucking off home time.

    Only the crossing lady was white.

    Crawley has fallen.

  66. 66
    A Pensioner says:

    Exactly. Like the Stalinist clearouts – show your hands, no sign of hard work, up against the wall.

  67. 67

    I wonder who put the letter on Gordon’s desk. I suppose it would be easy enough to find out by checking the local hospitals and asking if anyone has been admitted with a Nokia burried in the back of their neck!

  68. 68

    What fucking gentlemen ?
    what fucking right honourable ?
    they even have their own word for it
    as in “The right honourable gentlemen has been a bit disingenuous with the truth” !
    which to the public sounds a lot better than

    “That Twat Over There is a Total Lying Cu*t”

  69. 69

    In fairness to the not-very-bright coke-addled sons and daughters of the upper middle-classes who infest the media like a clinging dose of clap, they’re mostly givign the punters what they want. People are too thick and lazy these days – thansk to the socialist welfare state and socialist comprehensive education system – that they neither want detail, nor can cope with detail, in their news. Celebs and soundbites is all they can manage. I’d say, based on personall experience, that even among the educated classes you’re looking at perhaps 1% of the populace who take the trouble to get informed on all the major issue sin the world, perhaps less than that, given that most will still skip areas they’re hazy on, perhaps technology or science, the arts for others. I can honestly say, and I’m really not trying to big myself up here, it’s as much a source of odd shame as anything, that I have never come across anyone as well informed on such a wide range of subjects as … myself. I have this weird voracious news appetite. By no means do I know everything, but I know a little bit about almost everything. Enough to get by on bullshit…

    But it’s not that hard… just spend an hour or so a day reading almost randomly. Is there any point? Well yes – I knew for a bloody fact that the WMD line in Iraq was fantasy. Anyone who read around the subject *knew* that to be the case. I *know* the UK is fucked. Whoever wins. Fucked. Doomed. No way out – except a fortunate catastrophe. Hmm. What else… hmm, well, the Surinam toad has a pointed head…

  70. 70

    Ahem. My clues are in the post Sir Reg…

  71. 71
    Lord G says:

    What’s worse, in my opinion, is all the kids talking ‘english’ with a caribbean / gang / rapper accent (black and white)- it’s unintelligible at best, so how are these people ever going to be in gainful employment?

  72. 72
    Cast Iron Cameron says:

    “Today, I will give this cast-iron guarantee: if I become PM a Conservative government will hold a referendum on any EU treaty that emerges from these negotiations.”

  73. 73
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    “Socialism doesn’t work” On a basic level ive never met two people who claim to be socialists who agree with each other as tho what socialism is. Its a nefarious dream like concept which is characterised by its adherents inability to face up to reality!

  74. 74
    Mr Ned says:

    Did he ever bother about it? The whole reason he granted independence to the Bank of England was so he didn’t have to bother messing about with interest rates. All Gordon did was sit back and overtax the profits and then waste the proceeds by overspending on wasteful expenditure.

    Although, this ‘granting of independence’ never prevented him taking personal credit for the low levels of interest rate, even when it was fuck all to do with him.

    No, I am wrong. Credit where credit is due, he was not always lazy and just sitting back and taxing the profit of UK plc…. He was busy, he was far too busy getting into making the tax and benefits system as infuriatingly complex and unfathomable and expensive as possible.

    The other thing he did was remove the oversight capacity that the BoE had, which SHOULD have been left with the bank. Instead he farmed that out to a toothless political quango whose job it was to increase the values of property to ensure a debt fuelled never ending boom, AND now we know it was also done to allow MP’s to build large, tax-free property portfolios paid entirely by the tax-payer.

    The man is a complete and total CUNT!!!

  75. 75
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    When April Fools finish?

  76. 76
    Tory Voter says:

    Its been like that for decades.
    I don’t mind myself. London’s a world city
    and alot of the foreign women are quite alot fitter
    than homegrown anyway.

    If they vote Labour then thats something different.

  77. 77
    Down With Brown! says:

    Gordon Brown is the biggest April fool of all.

  78. 78
    jgm2 says:

    It’s not quite so bad. You could argue that those immigrants who scratch together a bit of money and have the nouse to make their way across several continents before arriving here have great reserves of personal resource that should, in time, benefit the UK.

    The problem, as you point out, that by the same token it is the ambitious natives who are leaving.

    So you are left with under-educated, motivation-free, IQ-deficient indolent natives who will soon see the Somali and Bang*la kids getting all the good jobs while they continue to sit around in Labour voting strong-holds moaning about their lot in life. It’s already happening in Brum.

    Grammar schools packed with Indian and St*ni kids while the native doletariate and their fuckwitted, glue-addicted, knowledge-resistant offspring make do with the local comp daycentre.

    No wonder the B&P is cleaning up in the NE.

  79. 79
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    You cannot hold a referendum on a treaty which the country has signed up to

  80. 80
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    Good point! I dont class Crawley as Sussex. Its a Labour social engineering project, a Trojan Horse in our midst. No the old Kingdom of the South Saxons – Crawley is the last of old England!!

  81. 81
    DNTT says:

    Had mine last week for local government elections on May 6th.

  82. 82
    REEVO says:

    Despite the rhetoric, as always any elected British Government will opt to target those least likely to complain or be heard, namely the weak and vulnerable while huffing puffing and spinning the opposite. Those that do complain will be ignored especially those in safe seat constituencies.

    More useless Quangos (jobs for the boys girls and cronies).

    More useless initiatives and schemes (smoke and mirrors).

    More corruption and certainly a lot more sleaze. (MP’s game on!).

    Nothings changed they still “don’t get it”

  83. 83
    Taggart says:

    Every body up here knows about Stevie Purcell but the labour mafia are pulling in a lot of favours in the written and broadcast media on this one as it could bring the house of cards a tumbling down.Can you imagine if it had been SNP or Tories. It will come into the MSM sooner rather than later.It was mentioned in the.HOC by an SNP.member,by Norman Tebbit in the HOL.Several respected journo’s are digging and are publishing.The deeper you look into this whole affair you realise what evil labour have tried to get away with and thats without the wee Hollie Grieg and Dunblane cover ups.Och the new

  84. 84
    DNTT says:

    Chocolate ration increased from 75g to 65g.

  85. 85
    Mr Ned says:

    Yeah, I saw that on the news. Their blind political correspondent (labour propagandist) even resorted to the line,

    “Well they would say that wouldn’t they because it means that they will pay less tax.”

    As if reducing the tax burden on employers is a bad thing???


  86. 86
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    If London is a ” world city” then where is our capital! Call yourself a Tory, then kindly start behaving like one!!

  87. 87
    Bored Sh*tless by Martin Day says:

    Eh up. It’s half term lads and lasses.

    Guido a suggestion for site improvement.

  88. 88
    Living Abroad says:

    Do foreigners have to become British citizens to work here. Virtually all Brits in France and Spain are only residents, they haven’t taken French or Spanish nationality.

    Why do foreign workers in Britain want British passports? Oh yeah, the benefits of course.

  89. 89
    Gordon Brown says:

    Whats a few lies compared to scotching the economy and getting away scot free.

  90. 90

    that is the type of stuff that should be on the billboards
    under the heading “Lest we forget “

  91. 91
    buzby says:

    don’t know his name but his face rings a bell……

  92. 92
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    I think you will get to a situation where the native indolent glue sniffers will be so de-educated and ignorant of their history that they will not be able to make the intellectual connection between their plight and the solution offered by the B*P. No the country is totally F****d.

  93. 93
    jgm2 says:

    Quite so. The FSA should be investigating Brown, Blair, Darling and probably the rest of the Labour cabinet for insider dealing on their property empires. Because they were uniquely placed to know that no effort would be made to stop a reckless housing boom. Prudence would not be invited to the UK housing boom.

    And, as events have proved, no amount of taxpayer money will be spared to keep it propped up.

  94. 94
    simon r says:

    So Gordon, how was your week ?

    2 more ministers caught up in ‘cabs for hire’ scandal

    osbourne’s good performance on chancellor’s debate

    backtrack over elderly care scheme

    public apology for Lumley bullying

    blair’s poorly received return to the political stage

    caught fiddling immigration figures

    business leaders supporting tories ni plans

    Don’t know about you but I am really looking forward to next week, come on, call that election you f****** coward.

  95. 95
    Anna says:

    “I did maths for a year at university. I don’t think I was very good at it. And some people would say it shows.”

    Gordon Brown

    Is this true??

  96. 96
    Cast Iron Cameron says:

    not if you are gutless no

  97. 97
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    They are banning the sack wearers very soon here in the non country!

  98. 98
    Anonymous says:

    This is no surprise. It’s safe to assume that when Brown is talking he is lying.

  99. 99
    PM says:

    The impartial BBC is now giving Mandelson & Co. free air time to attack the Conservatives spending plans.

  100. 100
    the voters says:

    we won’t

  101. 101
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    Labour ministers dont believe real Statistics and figures. A couple of years ago a junior Treasury Minister requested some historical tax statistics. On being told that tax on investment income was 98% in the mid 70s he told the civil servant off for suppying duff information. Typical Labour attitude. He simply could not accept how absolute crap they have always historically been!!

  102. 102
    The Ape Man Commeth says:

    The way I saw it at the time was that the malicious cowards primary concern was to become prime minister, whatever it took; I believe this was where the most of his energy was focused, he never took his eye off that ball.

  103. 103
    Angry Gobshite Brown says:

    NO, not that one, it doesn’t work ! Try the other one !

  104. 104
    The Dirty Rat says:

    Gordon Brown.
    The man on a crowded tube who stinks of p*ss, stale sweat and halitosis yet nobody has the bottle to tell him to his face.

  105. 105
    jgm2 says:

    Disagree. We need the truth. Otherwise we’re just postponing the inevitable.

    The sooner we confront the truth the sooner we can fix it. Or at least the sooner we can stop making it worse.

    The Greeks are a shower of indolent socialist jackasses – we have our fair share of indolent socialist jackasses but they’ve been hiding behind a patina of lies for too long. Time to drag the lying fuckers blinking into the sunlight and confront them with their crimes of idiocy.

  106. 106
    Mr Plum says:

    Its the 1st april every day with Gordon

  107. 107
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    Also, I know most people here try to ignore this FACT, onLy Britneu and Danemark gave the east euros permission to work in 2004.
    Did Germany…no way.
    France…forget it.
    Luxembourg… you are joking, surely!
    Belgium, Holland… I think not.

    That is why half of eastern europe came almost exclusively to Britney.

    Lock your garden shed, or charge them rent!

  108. 108
    MP says:

    they should be praising them

  109. 109
    Moley says:

    It sometimes takes a long time before people see through a skilled bullshit merchant, and it takes someone who knows the subject really well to expose them.

    Has the penny dropped with the other world leaders and the IMF?

    Does everybody understand that putting Brown anywhere near the levers of global finance will allow him to do for the world what he has done for Britain?

    How will Cameron be able to handle Brown’s barefaced statistical lies during the election debate?

    Are the leaders allowed to be wired up to receive outside briefings during the debates; (you can bet Brown will be, Labour’s first thought will have been “How can we cheat?”

  110. 110
    Hoon MacHoon Chief Hoon of Clan MacHoon principal Hoons of hereaboots and a liitle beyond! says:

    We can be obnoxious and renege on anything we like. Weve got rights you know!!

  111. 111
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    Jezzus, modded 4 times already this morning!

    PatienceNickpatience. Emily wil let it out, most of it, perhaps, in a minute!

  112. 112
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    The washing up awaits!

  113. 113
    Disaffected says:

    Well put Mr Ned, I also think he ought to travel the country to see how parts of UK resemble Africa and India. His quangos faithfully promote political correctness into the public sector to prevent anyone challenging the waste of money on interpreters, literature to promote foreign languages (except Welsh which ought ot be included). Extra personnel drafted in to schools, hospitals, benefit offices and police stations to help those who are not able to speak ENGLISH. I hope he is catering for the Turkish who will flood here soon. What I am also infuriated with is that his speech only referred to migrants outside the EU- we need to remember those inside the EU and asylum seekers. I can remember in 2002 that the goverment did not even know how many refugees were being accepted in the country. The service providers did not know either, they could only give estimates!! All Liebour cared about was that there should be enough distribution centres around the country- you may recall newspaper headings that the Met could not cope with the amount of sex slave cases from Eastern Europe (translaters costing the police £72 million pounds a year). Before many were processed they disappeared from where they were sent- funny that. The migrants were given fully furnished houses and NOT allowed to work for 3 months. I understand that the young people detained in Kent are given pocket money to help them understand our currency and to help them learn our language- more than most people can afford to give their own children who live here. It simply is a fcuking disgrace that Liebour wanted to change the face of Britain for their own self serving interests. A bit like Brown’s change to the banking system which has got the country in this economic mess while it lined their pockets and still does. Brown won’t let you down.

  114. 114
    Call me Infidel says:

    London is a world city. A turd world city sadly.

  115. 115
    משאבת בטון says:

    ‘Solution offered by the B*P’.

    What’s that then?

  116. 116
    Anonymous says:

    How’s that for a statistic – 100 per cent fucked.

  117. 117
    The Beast of Clerkenwell says:

    He wasnt lying ,merely using carefuly phrased statements to make the average idiot think the opposite of the truth.

    Any Drs out there reading this?

    My piss smells like Bovril and I haven;t been drinking it (the Bovril , nor piss)

  118. 118
    Yorkie says:

    I’m still chunky…

  119. 119
    Mr Ned says:

    @40, you should visit Cumbria. We are still mostly white and respectable here.

  120. 120
  121. 121
    Al Megrahi,s Doctor says:

    He’s laughing at us now!

  122. 122

    The final solution?

  123. 123
    Grandma says:

    Markets might panic? We might panic? On balance do it. It’s no good living a lie.

  124. 124
    Sarah Twit, The Twatty Totty says:

    Can’t think how many times I’ve been shagged senseless this past week.

    Never know who it is each time though, – they won’t let me keep the light on.

    I know something’s going to happen when the nurses take Gorgon away to play with his toy money.

  125. 125
    jgm2 says:

    Try posting it in two halves to see which half has the offending word. Repeat until you figure it out. Then let us know. It’ll be some auto-mod keyword.

  126. 126
    Anonymous says:

    Careful Frank F. You could end up learning more & more about less & less until you know everything about f**ck all.

  127. 127
    5 bellies says:

    10g will not get rid of even 1 bellie

  128. 128
    Maximus M. Bacillus says:

    Stop calling them all QUANGOs. In fact many are GONGOs, ie. Government Organized – lickspittles emplaced to pass off the organ grinder as merely the monkey. (With the collusion of the Blaggers Blagueurs Claque).

  129. 129
  130. 130
    Mnsgr. Phoney '£rd Way' Bliar, ***, ****, emoting + stupid grin says:


    I called by again to remind you I am very, Very, VERY RICH, – and all b’cos of Noo_Lie_Bore!

    And you can trust Gorgon’s stats. I did.

    And if you can trust me, you can trust Gorgon. Remeber – you very likely voted for me in the past.

    You can always trust an empty, vacuous, meaningless statement by Noo_Lie_Bore.

    It’s what we do.

    And Gorgon is so pleased to have me endorse him.

  131. 131
    Steve Expat says:

    Well done to Mr Scholar for pointing out the bleeding obvious to the Great Unwashed and the media, who have been trying to avoid this story for a while. Gordon Brown is a lying scheming cnut who has only five weeks left before we can all tell the liar to fuck off for good!

    Well done to C4News’ ‘Fact Check’ team for actually holding politicians (of all sides) to account for the lies they spin every day.

    Well done to the Tories yesterday for saying they will scrap IR35 – the most pernicious piece of legislation passed in the last 13 years, gaining nothing but costing millions – has Dave been reading about the Great Repeal Bill??

  132. 132
    RONNIE CRAYfish says:

    Ive just remembered !
    That Stephen Byers
    He’s a “Cock Jockey !

  133. 133
    Oh and by the way says:

    You’ve done it now Mr Ned, the order has already gone out to build a high speed rail link from Gatwick and Heathrow to repopulate Cumbria with your fair share of new wave immigrants.

  134. 134
    Cassandrina says:

    Baldemort this morning was on the Toady Programme and as usual had an easy ride, but came out with the statement that when NI increased some two years ago employment went up.
    Even the Marxist Toady questioned this and he repeated it. They then took it as gospel.
    Compare this to the grilling and constant interruptions that Cameron got from lefty Sarah on the same Today Programme.
    The bbc need to be punished for their traitorous bias in not holding the government to account, and allowing and supporting them to further bring Britain down.

  135. 135
    Hitler was a Marxist says:

  136. 136
    Tristwam Hunt says:

    I’m going to be an MP if Uncle Mandy has his way. Bally rotters on my consituenwhatsit don’t seem to appeciate my public school left wing cwedentials. I’m posh and pwoud!

    Toodle pip comwades!

    I’m not a complete twistram, honest!

  137. 137
    The day is coming... says:

    It what they do, but hopefully, the majority will see through the lies and propoganda when the opportunity is finally given on May 6th (but even this date is now being questioned).

  138. 138
    Anonymous says:

    Sir Reg, I draw to your attention the following:- “Tell a lie often enough & the people will believe it ” ~Joseph Goebels.

  139. 139
    Engineer says:

    I’ve been zapped in the past for using the word that describes a contemptuous or malicious chuckle. Suspect the Mod Machine doesn’t like the word when it has the ‘s’ removed, so any word with an ‘n’, an ‘i’, a couple of ‘g’s, an ‘e’ and an ‘r’ get clobbered. Understandably.

    Try ‘chortle’ instead.

  140. 140
    nell says:


    gutlessgordon as Dirty Harry – labour’s new campaign tactic.

    I read it and laughed – I think the Guardian is having an April Fool’s Day moment but I’ll bet gordon isn’t amused!

  141. 141
    Shocked says:

    I’m shocked! And appalled!

    Surely you can’t really mean that AlJaBeeba broadcasts anything remotely partisan?

  142. 142
    Steve Expat says:

    …and the publication of the report into the gold sold after it was annouced to the mar.kets, costing us all £6bn (or an NI rise next year, if you prefer)


    ..and Darling admitting being an illegal drug user

    ..and I’m sure others will help out with a few more…

  143. 143
    Phany Stroaker says:

    “I have thought for a while that the Tories should forensically dissect Browns tractor stats and ram them back down where they came from.”

    Surely you mean “…ram them back up….”, and preferably wrapped in a super rough grade of emery cloth?

  144. 144
    Old Nick Heavenly(really happy with my non country resident's permit and id card. Yes I am legal!) says:

    The yanks have one.

    Double the bad figures, half the good ones and basically you are there.

  145. 145
    Anyone but Labour says:

    There are 21.16 million full time workers in the UK (ONS Jan 2010)

    Labour is borrowing £500m a day.

    Labour is borrowing £23:00 a day (every day) for each full time employee in this country.

    That is £690:00 a month

    Or £8400:00 a year.

  146. 146
    Charles Flaccidwidger says:

    More of a bellend than a legend.

  147. 147
    Disaffected says:

    I think every MP should place their last five years expense claims outside each Polling Booth so people have a choice whether they want to vote for someone who does not possess the personal qualities to know right from wrong. It is plainly clear that they do not have the moral fortitude to stand up for bigger issues that affect the local area or country. In any case, the whip system prevents them from acting as individuals- unless they are lobbying for someone/company for money. We only need about 100-200 MPs. 643 MPs who are told what to vote on- absolute nonsense. Most of the useless committee’s should be scrapped and no serving MP should be on a committee which acts as a judge for their standards or interests.

    I would emplore every voter to check their MPs’ expnses before the election, it is easy to do, just go on line to the Daily Telegraph. Many MPs still claim publicly they have done nothing wrong and some claim John Lyons found them to be innocent- absolute lies. Vote the rubbish out.

    Let us not forget that Brown was in power and could have made this an issue. Of course he had self-serving interests not to do so with house flipping and his flat at Westminster. At the moment he is claiming to be a good leader who makes all the right decisions. Why did he not have the moral fortitude to say this is wrong and it must stop. He claimed on TV that he too was annoyed with MPs expenses- hypocrite who was and still is lining his pocket from property development paid by the tax paying public. The truth is he had no moral authority to act because he was doing the same. John Lyons’ Inquiry was limited and fudged, it never included house flipping that Brown, Darling, Hoon, Blears and many other Liebour MPs were guilty of (Blair’s claims were all destroyed, a trick he must have learnt when lying about Iraq). Elizabeth Filkin (Parliamentary Commissioner) hounded out of her job by people like Mandelson- perhaps that is why John Lyons has been so weak on the MPs’ expense scandal.

    Trust Brown’s judgment: Brown robbed everyone’s pension in 1997 and is now wondering what should be done to finance people in their old age- Brown won’t let you down. Brown sold our gold when it was at its lowest price costing the UK £7 billion pounds- Brown won’t let you down. Brown improperly financed the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, thousands of people lost their lives because Brown did not provide enough money. Brown’s denied this in complete contrast to the evidence of military chiefs. He then realised he did not fund the wars properly and wrote to confirm he was wrong- Brown won’t let you down. Brown is the one who was given a good economy and now it is bankrupt- Brown won’t let you down. Brown still claims for a second home that he does not have, brown won’t let you down. Brown recently told the country- I won’t let you down. He cannot be trusted. Brown has let you down for 13 years, it is time for change, vote him out.

  148. 148
    Quangos Must Be Abolished says:

    Quangos were created for the sole purpose of offloading government statutory obligations to unaccountable bodies thereby leaving the taxpayer howling at the moon.
    The fact that they can also be used as devices to reward corrupt placemen is an added bonus as far as partisan thieves and liars like Gordon Brown are concerned.

  149. 149
    Anthony Charles Lynton Blair says:

    Education, education, education!

    Well it was a good line you have to admit. I wonder how it all worked out, I spend so little time here anymore I hardly recognise the place. Oh well must dash, we are off to the caribbean for a little r`n`r after my brilliant comeback speech. Don`t forget, vote Labour guys, we are there for all the little people, not like those millionaire Tory toffs.

  150. 150
    BEN EFIT says:

    Fuck me is that the time ?
    i’ve gotta get up in five hours to sign on
    i was jus thinkin
    yer right that Brown bloke he’s a right lying bastard
    i wos lyin ear this mornin an a fancied rippin one off
    but then a realised that i havent had me free laptop
    so i’ll jus hav to keep usin the 1970’s skuzz mag under the bed for now

  151. 151
    MTV wasn't like that in my day says:

    That was very good!

  152. 152
    theprofromdover says:

    Here is something that World Statesman of the Year might be able to conjure up some ‘economic-with-the-truth’ about-

    This morning the financial blogs are discussing the quality of the Gold that Chancellor Brown sold in 1998 onwards *, appears not to have been ‘gold-bar’ quality -which is standard your are expected to sell on the markets.
    It seems that the purity of refining was only at ‘coin’ standard -ie melted-down trinkets.
    He was raiding the cupboards even then, and the BofE were too embarrassed at his behaviour to endorse his proposals.

    * he sold nearly 400 tonnes in total.

  153. 153
    hang um high says:

    well i think hes fucking desperate to stay in power because if he looses then hell be buried under all the fucking shit and lies and skeletons in the cupboard that will come out.
    I bet there are thousands waiting to spill the beans.i.e the gold sale.on him and this labour goverment

  154. 154
    Winston says:

    And then I realised that yes, war is peace and torture is good and protects us and that chocolate is cheaper today than yesterday and that Big Gordon was right, all the time.
    That is when my human spirit was broken and that is when I learned to love Gordon Brown.

  155. 155
    Very Angry Gobshite Brown says:

    Grrrr look into my eye, or I will punch you in the face!

  156. 156
    DNTT says:


    Living as I do within Birmingham, I would not be surprised to see the Bee And Pea get a lot of votes from wards such as Weoley, Erdington and Billesley.

    The old school, old socialist types are finding that the Bee and Pea has policies that are very similar to those spouted by Labour from the 1970s.

    The “doletariat” will be mini-bussed to the polling station and no doubt be rewarded with a sixpack of Stella and 200 Lambert on putting the cross in the correct box.

  157. 157
    jgm2 says:

    Good spot.

  158. 158
    Anon says:

    Count your blessings Nick, you are lucky you are allowed to post here at all.

  159. 159

    Sky news Gordon Brown is Threatening to re-nationalise british airways
    if they have any more strikes !

  160. 160
    Disaffected says:

    Brilliant, it should be the Lib dem’s tune after their last attempt.

  161. 161
  162. 162
    Hattie Harperson's curiously cavernous front bottom says:

    Oh, don’t you fret, there’ll be an election soon enough.

    We just plan to ignore the result.

  163. 163
    Mr Ned says:

    Ditto, but I spend about 5 hours a day reading news from all over the fucking place. I like to be informed and have a thorough and all-round understanding of the issues.

    I was blessed at a very young age to attend a small village school where a very impressive teacher had us all imagine what we would do if we were the King or Queen. We had a week of pure fantasy establishing what kind of country we would like to create. we were very young, full of life and wild ideas and we really enjoyed letting our imaginations flow unbridled and unrestricted to create a world in our minds of how we would want the world to be.

    Then after this she shattered our illusions by teaching us the actual way that laws were made (this was before the EU did all that stuff for us) and imprinted in our young minds how important voting is and why we should try to know as much as possible about ALL political parties and what they stand for and how to get that information. How to assess that information and how to make up our minds based on all the information we have gathered.

    Why? because our vote, although it is so tiny as to be almost meaningless, is part of a voice that can potentially change the entire country, like being a King in a fairy tale. So that is a great responsibility and it is very important that we treat it seriously. We can only vote properly IF we are properly informed to make that decision, whatever that may be. This lead on to another lesson about the importance of a free press. Oh how I laugh when I think back about that now.

    Note that this was to a class of 7 year olds in 1977. It had a profound impact upon me. There was absolutely NO bias or political message in these lessons at all. It was purely about the system in as nuts and bolts a way as possible.

    OK now, in my older years, as I have researched the political system in this country I now know that the system is rigged, the table is tilted and we are not offered this perfect freedom or democracy that my infant school teacher taught me about, AT ALL, but there IS still a spark of that system left.

    We DO get to vote and if enough of us vote against the corrupt establishment, (EG all those that are NOT going to vote), then we would have the numbers to make a difference. There NOW IS enough people who are sickened by the establishment to change it, but they are mostly asleep at the wheel.

    The point of this waffle is, that I do take the time to make sure I am informed, and like the post above, I too could clearly see, with almost no doubt at all, that Blair was blatantly lying about Iraq’s WMD BEFORE the invasion, in spite of most of the media LYING to the public about it and acting as blatant propaganda outlets for the Government.

  164. 164
    jgm2 says:

    No. That only happens if the locals stop voting Labour.

  165. 165
    Mary Hinge says:

    Isn’t there something about kiddy fiddling in the pipeline?.

  166. 166
    Mr Ned says:

    I am already there I think. LOL!

  167. 167
    Peter Thomas Anthony Manuel says:

    The pathological liar that sits in no 10 is nearly as consumate a liar as me.
    However I see that damage he has done, so just send him back up north to me.

    I’ll take GOOD care of him…………………..

  168. 168
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    …And Prezza will be elevated to the House of Lards……………….

  169. 169
    Dave AGW Cameron says:

    In light of that, I’m going to get rid of the windmill on my mansion and tell George to scrap my plans for a Green Bank.

    *snigger* Only kidding. More green taxes.

  170. 170
    bergen says:

    You’re wrong about the Somalis.A schoolteacher friend tells me that they are the one group that he fears.They’re not likely to climb the ladder to good jobs any day soon but will become a public menace instead.

  171. 171
    The Sleeper says:

    Having just watched part of the Mandleson,Darling and Byrne show on Pravda,I have to believe that Labour are running scared now.

    Mandleson slagged off Stuart Rose,and used the expression …”Quack medecine from a quack Shadow Chancellor”

    Nothing about their policies..just attack Tories.

    Now they seem to want to attack business for agreeing with the Tories.

    Mandlesons demeanour was of sheer anger..ordering either Darling or Byrne to answer questions.

    Definitely Labour are in panic.

    Roll on May 6th.

  172. 172
    Gordon's Evil Empire of Failure says:

    Why hold the local and general election on the same day when I can wait till June for the GE? Let’s have 2 election days. It may be more economical to have them both on the same day, but wasting money is what I do.

  173. 173

    Hey you stay there Dave we dont want you damaging your airbrushed face before the election
    there are about 10 million men out there who would just love to go outside with him for you !

  174. 174
    Right Bastard says:

    McMental ran out of anything meaningful to say a long, long time ago. In a last desperate throw of the dice to save himself and the stinking pile of shite called The Labour Party he has resorted to telling bareface lies, all delivered with a straight face.

    His date with Destiny can’t come too soon.

  175. 175
    Martin Day says:

    Did I mention I’m on the sex offenders register?

  176. 176


  177. 177
    The Bottle Fed Triplet says:

    I am told, the Eiffel Tower was only meant to be a temporary attraction and was to be dismantled after six months. A bit like the Crystal Palace. Shurely shome mistake?

  178. 178
    Anon says:

    Cassandrina, the BBC employees know that they would not get employed on such overly generous salaries anywhere else and so they will do and say anything to keep their jobs.
    The BBC live in a different world, they don’t care that their wages come from threatening householders with jail if they do not pay their cartel money, they really don’t give a damn about being truthful or productive or pubic service.
    They are in it strictly for the money which they would not earn elsewhere and in people are intimidated and threatened to collect their tax on TV they simply don’t care.
    The BBC don’t care about jailing people in order to have extortionate wages because the people who work for the BBC think they are better than us.
    They have a superiority complex over the British taxpayer and license fee payer.

  179. 179
    Mr Ned says:

    I was talking about an election that could actually change the Government. Not the pretend one that Brown is offering.

  180. 180
  181. 181
    DNTT says:

    Martin, get back to revising for your GCSEs. There’s a good lad.

  182. 182
    I hate New Labour says:

    True, but the BBC and MSM *never* take this lying scumbag to task do they?

    No wonder he thinks he can get away with it – he does.

  183. 183
    Anon says:

    Ah, another thick as thieves wannabe.

  184. 184

    ‘a sixpack of Stella and 200 Lambert’.

    A reward indeed. The ‘doleteriat’ can’t afford Stella and real fags. White lightening and roll ups are the favourites.

  185. 185
    jgm2 says:

    Absolutely. I trust the Tories already have all Brown and labour’s snide quotes about David Davis wasting money when he called an ‘unnecessary’ by-election over the issue of ID cards.

    No doubt giving the people the opportunity to express their opinion was a waste of money then. No doubt the same reason he saved us a few quid by not having a Lisbon referendum. Or a referendum on PR as promised in 1997. These votes are just so expensive to organise.

    But gripping on to the wheel and pissing away another 15 or 20bn quid in the four weeks between May 6th and June 3rd. And having two separate elections. Oh that will be money well spent no doubt.

    Disingenuous, self-serving, lying cu*nt.

  186. 186
    OTT but SPOT ON says:

    I’ve said this 10,000 times before on hundreds of occasions all over the world – Gordon Brown is a lying, cheating, fat-arsed git of the highest proportion. His inability to use the correct figures for anything lead me to believe he must have an IQ of minus 73, having failed all his mathematics exams at school, his ability to deduce anything from anything is certainly problematic and at worst totally incomprehensible.

  187. 187
    Taggart says:

    Wee Stevies nickname to a few of his chums was the Ketamine kid.Och the new

  188. 188
    Not long until Labour gone says:

    Yeah, the Biased BBC headlines with the Mandelson damage control rather than the actual story, 23 Industry chiefs back the conservatives plans.

  189. 189
    Leggs Akimbo says:

    I just watched it too, need to go and take some Gaviston, Mandlescum really is loathsome. Who paid for this party polital broadcast???

  190. 190
  191. 191
    PM says:

    When Labour are booted out in May, Mandelson can look forward to a new career as a comedian. He’s just said:

    “Mr Cameron and Mr Osborne are peddling a deception”

    This is from the man who’s been twice booted out of government for fraud. Staggering.

  192. 192
    Down With Brown! says:

    Labour have no credible policies and no record to boast of. They just snear, smear and whip up hate and hope to get votes that way. Utterly pathetic.

  193. 193
    Mr Ned says:

    The news will ignore it. After all the “expert” MPs looked at the CRU “climategate” leaked material and decided that Science now allows for a hypothesis to withstand contrary evidence. In fact in “Climate Science” nothing is allowed to challenge the central hypothesis. Evidence my be suppressed, hidden, lost, altered, manipulated and even invented, so long as it does not harm the hypothesis. Scientific publications can be threatened and Peer review can be conducted in secret by self selected peers and NONE of this invalidates the “science”.

    Well Climate science is NOT science. A religion?, A Cult? maybe, but it is NOT science. When real evidence from the real world does NOT trump data compiled in computer models (fed with bullshit data and run along bullshit algorithms based on bullshit assumptions), then you know you are NOT dealing with science anymore, but a cult!

  194. 194
    wet dishcloth says:

    ir’s not fucking Belium for a start Goober

  195. 195
    Leggs Akimbo says:

    Sorry I mean political….angry typing!!!

  196. 196
    Purpleline says:

    O/T Just watched the lying scumbags press conference it is noticeable that Mandelson calls Osborne a QUACK. This is a direct smear attack on Osborne’s brother who was recently before the GMC.

    What a nasty piece of work this Hunt is. Q

  197. 197
    Down With Brown! says:

    Being called a liar by Peter Mandelson is like being accused of being a short by Ronnie Corbett.

  198. 198
    Mr Ned says:

    This excellent article sums up my beliefs about climate change exactly.:


    Superb stuff!

  199. 199
    Purpleline says:

    O/T Just watched the lying Laboured press conference, it is noticeable that Mandelson calls Osborne a QUACK. This is a direct smear attack on Osborne’s brother, who was recently before the GMC.

    What a nasty piece of work this Hunt is. Question are all gay’s as vindictive as mandy

  200. 200
    hang um high says:


  201. 201
    anonymouse says:

    We’re all fucked. I’m fucked. You’re fucked. The whole country (department) is fucked. It’s the biggest cock-up ever. We’re all completely fucked.

    Sir Richard Mottram 2002 (Perm Secretary).

  202. 202
    Esther Ratzens arse cleaning tat says:

    s a u s a g e s

  203. 203
    Dick Tator says:

    I see what you did there. They’ve welched on every one of their promises.

  204. 204
    anonymouse says:

    What we really need to do is set up a campaign for a mass “spoiling” of ballot papers. It would really put the sh1t up the whole lot of them.

  205. 205
  206. 206
    jgm2 says:

    Do you remember when we had a show trial of the bank’s CEOs? Utter intellectual plancton Labour MPs without a brain cell between ‘em snidely asking the bank bosses what were their banking qualifications? Do you remember?

    When can we get some real fucking scientists asking the same jackass MPs pronouncing on AGW what are their scientific credentials? In fact when can we get some real scientists asking these AGW ‘scientists’ what are their ‘scientific’ credentials. The majority of them seem to be geographers and cartographers who happened to be doing the ‘right’ university course when the bandwagon set off.

    They’re no more scientist than fucking Polly Toynbee.

  207. 207
    robbo says:

    I think it important that Dave and George analyse the true statistics as soon as possible after moving in to Downing Street and publish the true state of the finances along with their plan. the longer they leave it the more chance that the population will believe the nu/old labour screams of ‘you caused it’. Publish the true figures and to try and sooth the markets try and publish a viable plan to deal with it.
    Anyone with a brain knows it will be far far worse than the present published figures.
    This is quoted from the new york times. ‘According to Nick Silver, an independent actuary who has studied Britain’s liabilities, the nation’s debt burden — including pension obligations and the cost of bailing out big banks — is actually 420 percent of G.D.P., twice the level of Japan, the world’s leading debtor.’

  208. 208
    DNTT says:

    The BBC won’t be getting any more money out of me.

    I haven’t renewed my TV Tax, and I have no intention of doing so.

    The nasty letters have started arriving, and I’m going to have them framed.

    Simple advice.
    TV Detectors are a myth.
    TV Licence “inspectors” are salespeople, they get paid a commision for signing you up on the doorstep. You can tell them to bugger off just as you can the numpty selling double-glazing.
    You do not have to let them in.
    You can tell them to get off your property or you will be calling the police to inform them of a breach of the peace.

  209. 209
    Alan Bread says:

    Perhaps Gordon can persuade ‘business’ leaders like Tangerine Tony or Bernie Madoff or that bloke from Lehmans to endorse his plans. Fred Goodwin or that numbskull Victor Blank might want to join in too.

  210. 210
    Porky Pickles says:

    I see C4 News is having to do the oppostions job for them yet again as Guido points out.Which is fair enough.
    You can’t expect Pickles to have much time to do it between Pie eating.

  211. 211
    hang um high says:

    wouldnt it be nice to see the media follow this up about the lies on imigration
    by Brown,for the sake of the country.
    sorry time to go back to your padded cell this is Browns world.

  212. 212
    Down With Brown! says:

    Lord Mandelson, Liam Byrne and Alistair Darling claimed this morning that a Conservative government would likely rise VAT. What evidence at all do they have for this claim? Have Cameron’s Tories ever suggested raising VAT?

    NuLabour are following Josef Goebbels’ dictum – repeat a lie often enough and eventually people believe it.

  213. 213
    Joseph Gorbon Bronwen says:

    “One of the most ridiculous aspects of democracy will always remain… the fact that it has offered to its mortal enemies the means by which to destroy it.”

  214. 214
    Gordon Brown says:

    You might think I’m an incompetent deranged traitorous corrupt lying Nokia-throwing one-eyed jock gayboy but I’ll be ignoring the result of the General Election and getting on with the job. I’ve sorted it with my bumchum Gus.

  215. 215
    Brown Hater says:

    You’ll be ideal in Labour Land. Yorkies aren’t for girls!

  216. 216
    Al Megrahi,s Doctor says:

    Also….. “These days, after all the misery you made.
    Is it any wonder that i feel afraid?
    Is it any wonder that i feel Betrayed!
    Kean- is it any wonder.
    I think this song could have been written for this government.

  217. 217
    The IMF is coming says:

    The Tories must put the National Debt as well as the deficit on the agenda. The whole lot – Debt, PFI and the Pension hole.
    When they are elected they can then at least not be blamed when it keeps going up. BBC allows Labour 13 years to blame the Tories. The Tories will get 13 minutes before they are blamed for everything.

    It makes me laugh, comical mandy and his two puppets attacking the Tories over NI. It is a drop in the ocean and pray tell, what are their plans? They have ducked a spending review which is a scandal.

  218. 218
    Mr Ned says:

    Quangos are a brilliant example of the Hegelian Dialectic of Thesis, Antithesis, Synthesis. AKA Problem, Reaction, Solution.

    The “powers that be” want decision making and power removed from the people. How do they achieve that?

    1. Create the Problem: Fuck up decision making in the Commons, in select committees and in local and regional councils, introduce corruption and piss-off enough people to cause a back-lash.

    2. Take note of, or create via useful media outlets, the reaction: Wait for people to distrust politicians on any specific subject, to the extent that they “demand independent decision making” on that subject.

    3. Create a quango to deal with it and all of a sudden, you no longer have those pesky voters having a say at all anymore. Fill the quango with your cronies with high salaries and fat expense accounts and you can really profit from the whole de-democratisation of this once free Isle as you take it into the “third sector” and away from democratic accountability or constitutional norms.

  219. 219
    jgm2 says:

    Aaaaaargh. ‘plankton’

  220. 220
    Lord Peter Flint says:

    To be fair Crawley has always been a bit ‘different’ and its closeness to Gatwick has always attracted a certain type of person. Sussex still has its charms though but God what the hell has happened to Brighton. There seem to be places which are positivly no-go areas if you don’t happen to be gay; I grew up there and was always proud that the place was tolerant but it grows more intolerant by the day no wonder the greens think they can get an mp there.

  221. 221
    Al Megrahi,s Doctor says:

    Oops- I mean Keane.

  222. 222
    Lord Peter Flint says:

    Lambert are not proper fags.

  223. 223
    Down With Brown! says:

    A special video from the department of Government waste celebrating 13 years of making Britain a world-leader in waste!

  224. 224
    Self-Employed Tyke says:

    On Toady, Montague laid into DC with interruptions about the NI and efficiencies.
    Later Webb gave Byrne an easy ride when Byrne countered by saying that Liebour had CREATED jobs from an NI increase by using the money to create more NHS jobs!! Webb should have tackled him up to say that this is disingenuous as public sector jobs don’t add value like private sector jobs created by an NI reduction would and besides these NHS jobs are just Brown creating his own client state!!

  225. 225
    Gordon Brown stole my pension says:

    If you really want to spoil your ballot paper, put an ‘X’ next to ‘Labour’.

  226. 226
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    Gordon can’t be wrong about the numbers, ever – remember he is an economic genius. Don’t you recall how he used to go on holiday to Cape Cod every year with a case full of economics textbooks? He was lying about that too.

  227. 227
    Brown's a Tosser says:

    Or never. He will have to be dragged kicking and screaming out of downing street. He will be like the little boy still holding on to the kncker and screaming I DO NOT WANT TO GO. What a complete asshole he really is a tosser.

  228. 228
    Anonymous says:

    Its a double negative being called a liar by Mandelson, means their telling the truth

  229. 229

    I have just started to draw my pension after paying it for 37 years
    the reasons for this are over the last 12 years it has lost over £100,000 thanks to Mr McBust and his gang of scum
    i am only 52 but i was sent a letter from the pension company quoting figures for now and in 3 years time
    the figures for 3 years time were less than the figures for now
    the government know how bad it is as they agreed to let people take them before april 6th
    the reason i have took the money
    and ran is i would rather be in charge of it than watch it dwindle away in somebody elses hands

  230. 230
    Down With Brown! says:

    Mr Cameron has managed to swat away Labour’s latest smear without any difficulty. The Tories have no plans to raise VAT.

    David Cameron MP, Leader of the Opposition BBC News/Sky News

    Mr Cameron insisted that a rise in VAT was not part of Conservative plans, and accused Labour of being patronising in their response to a letter this morning from business leaders praising the Tory proposal to partially block a rise in National Insurance.

    “Our plans don’t involve an increase in VAT,” he said. He went on to say the Labour suggestion that the business leaders who signed this morning’s letter had been misled was: “Patronising, wrong, will backfire, and shows their plans are in meltdown.”

  231. 231
    confused says:

    just heard half a briefing that Gordon has been found unconcious in number 10…whats happened

  232. 232
    Mr Ned says:

    Do you mean the word: snigger?

    That will be because it has the word nigger in it.

  233. 233
    Albert Pierrepoint says:

    At the end of a rope.

  234. 234
    Gay Gordon of Scotchland says:

    I am happy to lead you to more disasters in England and do not need you vote. I can just carry on as before, elections are a waste of time and you will obay. Just close your bin lid and don’t sell any gold fish or you will be in chains for the rest of your life.

  235. 235
    Anon says:

    Did you see Esther’s excellent quote about fraudsters like Moran being paid to do nothing in the newpapers today.
    A very good point and well made.
    Luton South is in the bag for Esther Rantzen methinks.
    I am sure TaT will be along to gloat when she wins.
    And I am positive he will be back to gloat even more when a hung parliament is voted for by the good and wise electorate of this great country.

  236. 236
    Archer Karcher says:

    Just stop paying the EU money and demand all we have paid for the last 14 years, be returned, unless and until they get their accounts signed off by the auditors.
    Anything less would make HMG accesories to fraud, under international law, they could do nothing.

    Stop feeding the beast.

  237. 237
    confused says:

    thought you had just croaked

  238. 238
    Mr Ned says:

    Thirded. Well said jgm2!

  239. 239
    The Court of Public Opinion says:

    Obama has just announced plans to invade Iran. Briun has agreed to commit more troops as long as he can get £20m in hoonwork when he leaves office and the US agree to be friendly to him later on when the rest of the world catches on to his scam.

  240. 240
    anon mk 2 says:

    I was trying really hard yesterday to be contentious and thus modded but failed all day

  241. 241
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    And Scotland
    And Kelly
    And Iraq
    And the Armed Forces
    And property dealings
    And bullying

    Not so easy to control the media when you are not in power

  242. 242

    My matewas at a partya few years ago and he walked into a bedroom and some bloke was back scuttling Una Stubbs over the end of the bed !
    Honest !
    i see Cherie Blairs father is sat on the couch giving another oscar winning preformance

  243. 243
    Roger Daley says:

    …while every child born to an immigrant instantly becomes a full fledged UK citizen.

  244. 244
    Phil Hope MP, Minister for the Third Sector says:

    You know.. too much..

  245. 245
    Gay Gordon of Scotchland says:

    I may be dead but I will still lead England to the thunder box of doom.

  246. 246
    Hold tight.. says:

    Parts of Hampshire still flying the flag…

  247. 247
    Butler to Lord Fondlebum says:

    His Lordship has just given a press conference accusing the Conservatives of “cynical deception”…even I had to laugh at that one. His Lordship is a card!

  248. 248
    Mary Hinge says:

    He’s fed intravenously,unlike John PresHunt who uses a trough.

  249. 249
    Mr Ned says:

    Clearly and obviously an April fool story from the Grauniad there. Very funny….

    …..then again……


  250. 250
    George Robertson says:

    I hope not.

  251. 251
    fishey fingers says:

    that was result for your mate..keep up the gossip wars much more interesting than this politics thingywhatsit

  252. 252
    The IMF is coming says:

    Two of the Business Leaders have hit back at Mandy who suggested they had been decieved by the Tories:

    Cheshire: it’s a little patronising to suggest that we’ve been deceived… whichever way you look at it, it’s a tax on jobs

    Wolfson: Do we pay for government profligacy through increased taxes or do we urge them to save money in a way that businesses have?

  253. 253
    Catflap says:

    Stats up Mr Brown,
    Stats up Mr brown,
    Eeh aye eeh aye eeh aye oh,
    he makes them up as he goes,
    Stats up Mr Brown,
    Stats up Mr Brown,
    Dont put your stats up,
    It shows Labour right up.
    Stats up Mr Brown.

  254. 254
    Anonymous says:

    I had to laugh when I heard Gordon Dracula claiming that they were getting tough on immigration…they have let millions of people in to this country in the last 13 years & now they expect the voters to believe that their new policies will work. I’m sure that Labour will get their answer soon!

  255. 255
    A female secretary says:

    I did and look what happened to me.

  256. 256
  257. 257
    English Liberation Front says:

    Many a true word spoken in jest.

  258. 258
    Gay Gordon of Scotchland says:

    A few years ago I was back scuttling a researcher chap with big Balls when in came Tony. He pushed me out of the way and told me I would have to go second. AGAIN!!

  259. 259
    Sir William Waad says:

    Now Gordon told such dreadful lies
    It made one gasp and stretch one’s eyes.
    His aunt, who from her earliest youth
    Had kept a strict regard for Truth
    Attempted to believe the fibber –
    The effort made her wince and gibber
    And might have killed her had not she
    Discovered this Infirmity.
    For Gordon’s fist upon his Dell
    Appeared to start the flames of Hell
    The laptop belched a gout of flame
    His aunt was out – that prudent dame –
    But, hearing Gordon shouting “Fire”
    The weary staff yelled back “You liar!”
    So that, when Gordon’s aunt returned
    Gordie, and the house, were burned.

  260. 260
    Madme Defarge. says:

    There has been (and continues to be) a lot of trouble between the established Asian immigrants in some London boroughs and the Somalis. The Somalis are considered to be lazy and sit around smoking Ghat all day and are the product of third world brutality highly unlikely to integrate or develop into useful citizens.

  261. 261
    amongomous says:

    ZZZzzzzzzz PARRRRRRP

  262. 262

    This from a time whenbritish comedy was great !
    in my view totally un offensive

    it’s a bit long but hey !

  263. 263
    ichabod says:

    Er , have you ever been to Birmingham ? On a recent visit (through choice incredibly enough !) I was shocked at the number of non white schoolchildren. Within a decade or so they will mostly of child bearing age, and we know what enthusiastic breeders readers of the Koran are.

  264. 264
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    Your name says shocked but you are, and I quote “shocked and appalled” you have told an untruth. Please move to the heart of government immediately

  265. 265
    Stranger in my own country says:

    I was on a tube recently and I was the only white bloke in my somewhat crowded carriage. Two more white blokes got on and stood near me and it turned out that they were Australian tourists!

  266. 266
    the planet [is it getting warm on here lads ?] says:

    Ah dear martin I’m sure somewhere in this infinite universe there is some one more deluded than you ! but until using the large hoondrone colander we find it ! can you keep up the good work giving everyone on this planet something to look down on !.

  267. 267
    The Dirty Rat says:

    This blessed plot, this earth, this realm, this England.

  268. 268
    Catflap says:

    Cherie’s dad was in all those confessions of a window cleaner type films.
    He should do an updated version.
    ‘Confessions of confessing to a perverted priest’ Starring Cherie (get your tongue out the Popes arse)Booth Blair.

  269. 269
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    But do you people understand how hard it was this morning to discredit this story? The great Lord M and Allie C thought it was an April Fool at first and gave us absolutley no guidance at all until late when we had regrettably had to report the facts. Damage limitation now in full swing. Sorry your lordship.

  270. 270
    Dont vote for that Pig vote for this Pig says:


  271. 271
    Hang The Bastards says:

    I hope he’s finally had that massive fucking STROKE I have been wishing & prediciting for some time now.

    Abigail (Aged 6)

  272. 272
    Captain Stereotype says:

    And all Tory Voters must be greedy bankers who fox hunt, right ?
    Stupid C’unt.

  273. 273
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    The last thing they want is 19000 anti labour voters to have a say. This needs to be banged home constantly. He cannot be allowed to get away with it – these people deserve more.

  274. 274
    The day is coming... says:

    One day then truth will come out.

  275. 275
    Goobercountry says:

    they’re almost as bad as the Belgians

  276. 276
    Mr Ned says:

    Nope, that would just spoil the country… Or keep spoiling it, anyway.

  277. 277
    The Director of Politically Krect 'n Convenient Troof at AlJaBeeba, the Brhoon Bullshit Corpse says:

    BBC executive tried to hide large salaries

    ‘Reward director’ Robert Johnston asked staff to ‘deliberately disguise’ managers on six-figure salaries, e-mails reveal (Times)

    Us high-ups at AlJaBeeba, – we have to hide our salaries – or the sheeple would get the wrong idea.

    But hey! – we’re worf it!

    Anyway – just make sure you pay your telly tax!

    We need the money. We’ve got us pensions to look af

  278. 278
    dream on says:

    Jeremy Hunt Conservative MP, Shadow Culture Secretary

    “I believe that the BBC is a great national institution.”

    “I am proud of the BBC. I think that most British people think that we are very lucky to have a BBC and most people who aren’t British, if they don’t have a BBC, wish they did have one.”

    “I don’t see the BBC as a State broadcaster. “I think people see the BBC as operating at arms length from the government and it’s very important that it should continue to do so and that’s why we’ve said we will protect the BBC charter.”

  279. 279
    Watt Tyler says:

    I beg your Gordon…

    Yikes! Brown as you’ve never before seen him.

    (2009) New Labour ILLIGITIMATE “P.M.” Gordon Brown -PARASITE: http://eotp.wordpress.com/2009/05/08/2009-new-labour-unelected-p-m-gordon-brown-parasite/

    Next stop for Brown: Bedlam.

  280. 280
    The Sleeper says:

    Mandleson now likening Osborne to a kid nicking sweets from the sweetshop…….a bit like Brown stealing our pensions and the future prosperity of our children.

    Meanwhile,two of the signatories to the Telegraph NI letter have responded angrily to Labour claims that they “have been deceived by the Tories”….by completely dismissing such claims.

    Let’s just hope that this precipitates the start of a City retaliation against this corrupt,deceitful,incompetent bunch of thieves….Labour,of course.

  281. 281
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    Prescott on Newsnight on Tuesday was plain ridiculous. Attacking every comment, mentioning Ashcroft at every opportunity, relevant or not, making silly hand gestures to Huhne and saying “Yap Yap Yap”. The interviewer just savaged the other two and played up to Prescott. These people need to understand there will be no job for them in a few weeks.

  282. 282
    jgm2 says:

    Cue Labour news conference with Mandelson getting all sniffy and patronising about how that business leaders shouldn’t be getting involved in politics. With possible special reference to the banks.

  283. 283
    R Slicker says:

    The post just arrived. Technically “morning post”, I suppose.

  284. 284
    Roger Daley says:

    Worzel Gummidge had a stiffy !

  285. 285
    I'm Mandy, lie for me says:

    I prefer intra-anally

  286. 286
    Wavy Davy Bullingdon Gravy Loves to eat his Greens says:

    Mr Cameron said: “If you want to understand climate change, go and see Al Gore’s film, An Inconvenient Truth. Today, I want to tell the British people some uncomfortable truths. There is a price for progress in tackling climate change.”

    Mr Gore praised the role Mr Cameron had played in promoting environmental issues.

    “The fact that both your political parties are competing vigorously to offer solutions is very important,” he told Tory frontbenchers.

    “I can assure you that people around the world really are watching and are appreciating the quality of this debate.”

  287. 287
    Piano Wire says:

    I can’t wait to see the fuckers dancing on the end of a rope.

  288. 288
    The Sleeper says:


    Brown the bullying thug in a class war against the toffs.

    Except that all the Tories need to do is blindside him for the KO.

    What a complete twat…I can’t believe that any self respecting ad agency would suggest the strategy of publicising our PM as a lout who beats the shit out of anyone who disagrees with him.


  289. 289
    jgm2 says:

    They are just winding us up aren’t they. How does he muster the gall to come out with shit like this after 13 years of Labour fuckwittery –

    He said shadow chancellor George Osborne was “like a kid in a sweet shop, who thinks he can just grab sweets from every jar without paying for them”.

  290. 290
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    Plant the seed in the mind of the people and then the Conservatives have to deny it. Knowing that they can never totally rule it out, they will deny with some caveat, which the spin machine will then leap on and all of a sudden the Tories are planning to raise VAT despite their denials. Job Done

  291. 291
    The Court of Public Opinion says:

    Fucking hell I just checked the C4 link and the date is yesterday – I’d assumed with this being up all morning it was an April fool. Unless…

  292. 292
    Gordon Brown says:

    Please accept my sincerest aplogies and rest assured i will have a laptop despatched to you straight away.
    Also i take full responsibility for what has happened. That’s why the person who is responsible will go immediately.

  293. 293
    QWERTY says:

    Did anyone else see how the BBC reported this last night? It got a brief mention before the BBC mongs then went into a story about evil Tories and immigration. The BBC didn’t even highlight this was at least the third time (the gay one eyed mong was caught out before using dodgy crime stats as well) this month he told lies.



  294. 294
    The IMF is coming says:

    From the Party that has spent £1.4trn on ‘sweeties’

  295. 295

    Hung parliament!!!


  296. 296
    QWERTY says:

    I see Lord Rent Boy is getting worried about the Tories and their NI cuts. Well it’s not really a cut is it, just not putting it up. But the BBC have as usual sided with Liebour, the BBC were pleading for some businessmen to come out (ho ho ho ) and support McMongy.

    Expect to see Liebour some up with some proposal of their own very soon

  297. 297
    Bemused of Suffolk says:

    Now that’s what I thought, as PMs who lose an election are usually out of Downing Street with immediate effect, but his latest plan to hold on to power even if he loses the election gives him at least a month or so to man the shredders 24/7.

  298. 298
    I hate New Labour says:

    Uh oh: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/election-2010/7539652/Gordon-Brown-could-lose-and-still-be-Prime-Minister.html

    Looks like he’s not leaving even when he loses.

    What’s the betting some ‘emergency’ comes up that means there couldn’t be another election for years?

  299. 299

    Traditionally the election is called four weeks ahead of the date but legally I believe only three weeks notice is required. That means Brown could wait until the 8th or even 15th April and still annunce a May 6 GE.

    Whether he will or not is a matter of an entirely different stripe.

  300. 300
    AC1 says:

    Any increases in debt should be discounted from GDP.

  301. 301
    The Sleeper says:

    Fuck…just realised the date today!!!


  302. 302

    Man Utd have announced plans to sell their stadium to raise funds to pay down their massive debt.
    Gordon..take note!


  303. 303
    Rex says:

    It’s got to be an April the 1st joke……… Surely!!!

  304. 304
    Lizzie says:

    Labour are not called “liebour” for nothing, it is a well deserved title, and they live up to it every day.

  305. 305

    Wasn’t there an American politician who recently got in trouble for using the word ‘niggardly’?

  306. 306
    MI5 says:

    Don’t forget that Lord Mandelson

    1) Is unelected . So what the fuck does he think he is doing giving us any opinion on anything unless he is elected

    2) has never done one day’s work in a business, yet tells business lmeaders who have spent their lives working in business how to behave

    3) Has had to resign twice from Government for shady dealings

    4) is no openly lying about tories raising VAT etc like his oss the serial liar Brown

    It is high time that a senior Tory tells Mandescum these facts on national television to his face…

    I think he is like thuggie Whelan. Just a bully and when you tell him to fook off he just goes away…

    and throws a hissy fit in private…

    These socialist liars need to be taken apart publicly….

  307. 307
    Lizzie says:

    I propose they fall into their own black hole.

  308. 308

    Well it was quite good I thought, but as soon as I read it, smiled grudgingly, I then imagined Mandy reading it thinking “hmmmmmmm…..”

  309. 309
    M.T. Bucket says:

    You are not alone Frankie I am in the same boat, I was with NPI who were taken over by the Aussies AMP who cut and run after the pension raid.
    Now its a zombie fund only tranferable at a 25% cost to my fund.

  310. 310
    fuckwit of the month says:

    Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha !!!!


  311. 311
    Anonymous says:

    Next Tuesday Gordon goes to the Palace to call an election.
    The bank-tax on bonuses also ends on the same day.

    Surely some politically embarassing celebration in the city is due…

  312. 312
    udderly 'orrible says:

    I got one sent me in the name of the flat’s previous owner and another for me also, even though I never asked for it … Liebour gearing up to steal the election, they have form in the Kirkcaldy McSlimelands.

  313. 313

    Duurrrrrr!!!! I fell for an obvious April fool


  314. 314
    jgm2 says:

    He will defer until the last possible moment hoping for some good news. Or Cameron getting knocked off his bike by a Lorry. Or something.

    He probably doesn’t even realise it himself that the date will be 3rd June. he’s probably mulling over a number of delicious scenarios in his head. Moving his imaginary troops around an imaginary battlefield baiting the perfect trap for his political enemies. But in the end he will decide that the best tactic is to delay the announcement until the last second and delay the election until the last possible day.

    Then claim that is what he decided to do months agao. Because it was the right thing to do.

    Because that’s how his fucked-up mind works.

    June 3rd. If at all.

  315. 315
    I hate New Labour says:

    It’s nearly as funny as the Guardian’s circulation numbers…

  316. 316
    DNTT says:

    Captain Stereotype:

    Nope not all of them. I find most of them just want to get busy earning a living without being financially fucked over to pay for vanity projects, and to keep the lazy and feckless in comfort.

    The “doletariat” are those that think the world (and it’s taxpayers) owe them a living. They think they should be rewarded for breeding and doing sweet fuck all.

    Trust me, I’ve lived amongst them for long enough. They would happily put a cross in the box for booze and fags.

  317. 317
    The Sleeper says:


    A senior fucking moment…alright?

  318. 318
    I'm the Heir to Blair Tony Cameron (hear my soundbites roar!) says:

    Tough on clones, tough on the causes of clones

  319. 319
    Gordon Brown stole my pension says:

    I was going to site Brighton, as I live there.

    If (and it’s a big ‘if’) you do hear English being spoken on the street, it’s with a foreign accent.

    As for the gays, I find it’s only the young ones who are openly hostile to strangers/straights, which I put down to the fact they’ve probably recently ‘come out’ to their parents and got a bad reaction, after 10-15 years of bullying at school. By the time they’re in their 50s, they seem to mellow-out.

  320. 320
    John Thomas says:

    Pickles is the heir to Prescott

  321. 321
    oldrightie says:

    The Marches are glorious!

  322. 322
    Mr Ned says:

    The tories should have an office full of staffers making FOI requests 24/7 and they should be doing this NOW!

  323. 323
    amongomous says:

    Agreed! they fight for us we can fight for them by electing a government that respects their sacrifice.

  324. 324
    Ministry of Truth says:

    +++++++++++++++BREAKING NEWS++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    The Ministry can report that three key Labour Government Ministers pulled off one of the best April Fools Day jokes for some time on assembled hacks/hackettes at Labour HQ this morning.

    An unnamed source confided to the Ministry that the three Ministers had had difficulty maintaining a straight face throughout as they attempted to pull off one of the greatest pranks on assembled journalists that had ever been attempted. “It was a particular heart thumping moment when Lord Mandelson claimed that business leaders who had come out in favour of Tory policy on NI cuts had been deceived but he managed to actually deliver the line faultlessly” said an unnamed staffer before adding “Although we were all “bricking it” behind the stage that the journos would rumble it particularly when Nick Robinson actually asked a non-partisan question which almost threw us as it was totally unexpected !”

    “How the three of them actually managed to keep a straight face as they came out with the script was truly amazing” said another intern. “I think this shows exactly how skilled Labour Ministers are in selling these things to agullible media and bodes well for our re-election!” before being hurriedly shushed by a more senior party spokesperson and rapidly ushered away into a side room.

  325. 325
    oldrightie says:

    It seems that the British love being shafted so much Labour will be in power for ever.

  326. 326

    Try drinking fluids that AREN’T alchoholic.

  327. 327
  328. 328
    Tango Tony and Slotgob Slag says:

    Labour must not lose. It will severely diminish the wadds of cash we make by peddling contacts and influence. Our ambition is to be as rich as the great Kinnocks who have managed to fleece the taxpayer for umpteen millions and have all their family in cushy state -funded sinecures. They have raised the bar in lucrative hypocrisy and our only wish is to emulate them. Three chers for New Labour.

  329. 329
    joolz says:

    Good idea, why cant WE the people do this, if one person goes to each polling booth and puts up a piece of a4 with what each mp claimed, what could they do?


  330. 330
    Archer Karcher says:

    A case full of nappies and condoms more likely.

  331. 331
    Gordon Brown stole my pension says:

    And why do Labour want immigrants to have British passports? To the point virtually thrusting a British passport into the grasping hands of every immigrant?

    Oh, yeah, so they can vote. I wonder who for..

  332. 332
    John Thomas says:

    The grand old Gordum Brown marched his men to the top of the hill, then marched them down, when they wre up they were up, and when they were down!!!

  333. 333
    Levi Stapress says:

    Only notionally independent dear boy. The whole thing was rigged via his placemen and the ridiculous inflation target.

  334. 334
    Archer Karcher says:

    They are projecting their own inadequacies onto their opponents. They have a collective mental disorder, they are incapable of being honest. Only five weeks of this shit left.

  335. 335
    QWERTY says:

    None of this matters to the BBC, he’s a bummer and that’s important to them.

  336. 336
    Mr Ned says:

    “As for the gays, I find it’s only the young ones who are openly hostile to strangers/straights which I put down to the fact they’ve probably recently ‘come out’ to their parents and got a bad reaction, after 10-15 years of bullying at school.”


    If my natural aversion to having a bloke’s cock being very unwelcome in my arse, and finding the very idea to be repulsive, un-natural for me and sick is an example of “homophobia”, then their aversion to what I consider to be NORMAL sex is a sign of their blatant “heterophobic” bigotry.

    It is time that the natural majority STOPPED giving in to the gay mafia, and asserted the fact that heterosexuality IS NORMAL and nothing to be ashamed of.

    Stamp out “heterophobic” bigotry NOW!!!

    I am NOT homophobic. A phobia is an irrational and debilitating fear. the word “homo” in homo-sexual, means “the same” so to suggest that I have an irrational fear of “the same” is utterly meaningless and ridiculous. Even to suggest that I have an irrational fear of the same gender, or sex with the same gender is utterly incorrect. There is NO fear at all. I find the idea of having sex with a man to be disgusting, but I have no irrational fear of ANY homosexual person at all.

    Nor am I against homosexual people or homosexual rights, at all.

    In fact the best man at my wedding (my very best friend through school) was openly homosexual and his boyfriend was the chef that made my spectacular wedding cake. We were good friends until about 10 years ago, when he changed relationships from the chef, and moved in with a blatantly “heterophobic” lover and I have not seen or heard from him since. A really good, true friendship has been lost because of “heterophobia”. ALthough I am always ready and willing to welcome him back into my home as a good and true friend.

    I am not against homosexuals, or homosexual rights in any way, shape or form, but I AM sick and tired of blatant “heterophobic” agendas!

    I am in favour of equality regardless of the legal, adult and consensual sexual preferences of people, but the balance is now swinging too far and the latest “equality” legislation is nothing of the sort.

  337. 337
    Purpleline says:

    What they should do is arrange a meeting with the Greek PM remarking they wish to learn the lesson the new administration in Athens is performing after findng a massive Black hole in Greek economic statistics.

    It gets the message out that they might at some point, call for an inquiry and a audit of the true position of the British economy. Also they could just spin it that they are looking at the measures Greece is taking to reduce the deficit.

    Either way until the card is played they will have Labour in turmoil and when in turmoil we know they make mistakes.

  338. 338
    Hollie Greig says:

    I hope so!

  339. 339
    Moley says:

    Regarding Blair and Iraq, what really got me was the massive troop movements taking place in East Anglia BEFORE the Parliamentary vote.

    And putting Saddam Hussein in the position of having to reveal all the weapons he did not have in order to avert an invasion.

    The decisions had been made by Blair and Bush regardless of the presence of WMDs and regardless of the vote in Parliament.

  340. 340
    PM says:

    No it’s not.

  341. 341
    Up sh1t creek says:

    I am the great Gordon, I do not lie to you, I just bend the truth to suit my twisted Open Borders agenda.

  342. 342
    LibLabCon enemies of Britain says:

    I don’t mind myself. London’s a world city

    Spoken like someone who doesn’t have to live there, or not in the more enriched parts at least.

    Tories and Labour – both mass immigration parties. Tories out of low wage, corporate greed, Labour out of Marxist anti-British hate.

  343. 343
    Up sh1t creek says:

    Hi, my name is Phil Woolas, and I do not acknowledge the figures the ONS have given here, our leader, the great Gordon is right, and everybody else is wrong. Immigration really is falling, look I myself compiled the statistics that prove it!

    Please don’t check me and the LibDem’s out on Newsnight (31March2010)… I in particular made a right arse of myself.

  344. 344
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    And the headline for this story on the BBC website? “Tory Tax Deception Row Erupts” Priceless – you could not write this rubbish

  345. 345
    Stop Funding The Labour Party Spin Machine With My Licence Fee says:

    And the headline for this story on the BBC website? “Tory Tax Deception Row Erupts” Priceless – you could not write this rubbish

  346. 346
    D L George says:

    The upstanding police looked into it all extremely briefly (bribary of the council, peculiar funding, drug dealing, dodgy police, mafia, a mountain of evidence that makes Ben Nevis look like a wee hill) and found there was nothing to investigate.

    Makes you proud.

  347. 347
    stilyagi_air_corps says:

    Yeah, man, but that ain’t reel Soshalissm, izzit?

  348. 348
    stilyagi_air_corps says:

    Get to it for Esther, TaT, I’m sure you’ve got more readers than that on your own blog.

  349. 349
    Dan Hannan says:

    I did, and I’m still here.

  350. 350
    udderly 'orrible says:

    If Her Maj the Queen leaves him in power in a hung parliament that would be dandy. He will then be far worse off drinking from the wells he has so deeply poisoned. His death will be excruciating agony. Just carry on McSlime&Ruin, we want you and Ediot Castration to win … in a hung House.

  351. 351
    BEN EFIT says:

    Oh yeah, an it’s freezin in ere. any chance ov laggin me loft like you said youze would?

  352. 352
    Mr Ned says:

    I can actually envisage a section of society where this would work rather effectively.

  353. 353
    Anon says:

    The only April Fool is you.

  354. 354
    Gordon Brown stole my pension says:

    Hang on, Mr Ned, I’m not talking bollocks. Your natural aversion to cocks up arses doesn’t explain hostility by gays. I’m merely attempting to find a rational explanation for young homosexuals in Brighton being very rude and hostile to strangers and/or straight people, whereas older homosexuals aren’t.

    My hypothesis is quite a good one, I think. I’m very pleased with it. It is entirely possible, though, that the younger ones are emboldened by the fact they can be very abusive to you, in the knowledge that if you’re abusive back they can accuse you of ‘hate crime’ and the police have to get involved, against you. That’s my other hypothesis, which I harbour whenever one of them’s pushed in front of me in the pub and I’ve had the audacity to complain.

  355. 355
    Cato Street Conspirator says:

    Yes, they didn’t have any ‘plans’ to increase VAT in 1979 – and proceeded to almost double it from 8% to 15% in their first budget. Remember one thing – all politicians lie and the ‘no plans’ is the oldest lie in the book.

  356. 356
    Harpic says:

    I also liked Iain Dale’s exclusive on the strike of returning officers om May 6th which could result in votes not been counted till the end of the dispute. Seems he managed to get a couple of Gov. Depts, to believe it.

    Nice one!!!!

  357. 357
    Harry the Camel says:

    No, no, no. You see you have already been conned.

    No surprise, Darling happily swapped ‘defecit’ for ‘debt’ according to mood the other day. Either he is an incompetant or a liar. Or both.

    The Labour law, to halve the defecit by 2014, is to halve the percentage of GDP McRuin borrows from 12% today, down to 6% in 2014. By that time the debt will be £1.5 trillion and will keep growing until the defecit can be brought to zero.

    At that point the debt may be £2tn and then we have to pay annual interest and then, we have to start paying it down. A defecit of negative (a surplus) 12% for example means paying down the debt at 150bn pa for more than 10-15 years.

    Nice job McRuin.

  358. 358
    Harry the Camel says:

    21 million includes gordon’s 6m army does it not ?

    take away 6m = 15 million actual producers..

  359. 359
    cant hunter says:

    A health worker from the Birmingham area informed me recently that it was common knowledge in medical circles that certain communities in the West Midlands practice female castration, ie removal of the ovaries, without fear of the law.

  360. 360
    fishey fingers says:

    i thought he was the salvation army window cleaning heir

  361. 361

    But most of all – Heather Brooke, surely.

  362. 362

    Fucking ha ha.

    Anyone playing an April fool “joke” needs a double tap.

  363. 363

    BBC charter.

    BBC institution.

    Nothing about the c­u­nts who work there at the moment…

    Got it yet?

  364. 364
    Anonymous says:

    He’s got my vote!

  365. 365
    Axe The Telly Tax says:

    Easily replaced, after the election, when the BBC is carved up and sold :)

  366. 366
    g1lgam3sh says:

    Send them a letter withdrawing their ‘implied right of access’. They can’t even come to your door then.

  367. 367
    City of Vice says:

    Well done that man at the Stats Office?

    However, I would advice that you don’t go walking in the woods alone until Brown and his cronies are safely out of office…

  368. 368
    City of Vice says:

    Well done that man at the Stats Office1

    However, I would advice that you don’t go walking in the woods alone until Brown and his cronies are safely out of office…

  369. 369
    City of Vice says:

    Oh bollox can’t find my ‘!’ key..

  370. 370
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am the great and wonderful wizard of the UK

  371. 371
    Robert Ainsworth says:

    Ha! Ha! Legs can never be akimbo though arms can

  372. 372
    Chuck E Oeuf says:

    Mmm. I rather think it’s going to take a phonecall to the lads barracks in Hereford then the Iranian seige – stun grenades an’ all – all over again before the friggin shithead can be removed/terminated with extreme prejudice. Then the whole of No 10 will need to be sterilised and steam cleaned of all the excrement sticking to the floors, walls and ceilings in order to make it habitable again by a true representative of the British people.

  373. 373
    Martin Day says:

    No, because I support Labour – the party that supports rape, incest and kiddy fiddling MP’s, so I don’t have to be on the register !

  374. 374
    Martin Day says:

    lol, we don’t have to revise for them any more under Our Glorious Leader – they give them to us for free !

    aren’t I complete CUN T ??

  375. 375
    Joe Bass says:

    The above discussion reminds me of my childhood in Wales. My parents lived in a ‘nice’ middle class area close to the Grammar Schools. It was my duty to take the dog for a walk each morning before school started. Only one foreigner lived in our estate, an Asian medical Doctor. My dog for some reason always bolted to the Doctors garden to relieve himself of solids. Try as I might the dog would not wait until we got to the open ground and fields – the dog insisted on utilizing the Doctors garden. It became so that my friends understood I had ‘trained’ my dog accordingly. The real answer was of course that my dog liked shitting in the long grass and as the Doctors garden was the only one in the estate that was wild and unkempt, the dog really had no choice.

  376. 376
    Anonymous says:

    Isn’t this simply Labour’s way with everything? Say a lie with a blaze of publicity then apologise when you are found out. No one remembers the apology and the lie is already out there. In any case an apology is for something you in advertently did what Brown does is clearly thought out dishonesty.

  377. 377
    Sid says:

    (some of you should grow up and stop being so unneccessarily abusive. You are not adolescents so why act like them)
    ‘When the Tories get in one of the first things they should do is restate the national debt to honestly reflect the dire truth of the position hidden by Gordon’s years of deceit…’

    I have been arguing for honesty and truth-telling like this for 20 years, including under the previous Tory administration. The USA needs to do this too about the true level of its debt commitments for the future or it, like ‘Great’ Britain, is finished.

    Public sector pension shortfalls I read are in the region of £60-70 billion. These are not accounted for in any figures I have seen regarding our gargantuan national deficit and, quite separately, our overall National Debt. And I haven’t even begun to think of PFI schemes.

    Moreover the real number of adults of working age not working and thus able to support themselves is closer to around 5 MILLION because every time a person on Jobseekers Allownace or one of the other similar but differently named schemes is required to attend a ‘Job Training scheme’ of some kind they disappear from the unemployment statistics.

    In other words, they are regarded as employed, despite costing the taxpayer the same. And such schemes are usually just mandatory job search clubs with little or no training at all … more mis-selling to the general public. Now add to all that the fact that this Labour government has deliberately but secretly encouraged mass immigration since 2000 in order to force down wage rates, whilst spouting phrases like ‘British jobs for British workers’, including those of the indigenous population that has thus far been Labour’s main source of support. And finally that this and the National Wage mean that several million more people in the UK cannot afford to cover all theiral mortgage/rental commitments, tax and utility bills, etc and thus are eligable for subsidies from amongst the rest of the working population. Do you begin to see the true state of things that Labour has hidden from the public?

    Britain has a very bleak long term future indeed unless and and until it finds some courage. The courage to be brutally honest and lay everything bare on the table before the people of this country. We’ve got to know the full, or fullest possible, scale of the national debt and make long term plans accordingly. And if there is more than one way of calculating this, then give all the sets of figures.

    This is our solemn duty to ourselves and future generations, for if we do not do so this generation will not and should not be forgiven. Ever!

  378. 378
    jolly says:

    of course gordo the prince of liars,surely bound to be caught out soon

  379. 379
    DNTT says:

    Don’t do that. It just draws attention to the fact that you are willing to get into an argument with them.

    Ignore them, ignore their empty threats, give them no information whatsoever.

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George Galloway says of his former Respect candidate the UKIP MEP turned Tory, Amjad Bashir…

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