March 15th, 2010

How to P155 0FF the Locals

One time girlfriend of Euan Blair, and now Sion Simon’s squeeze, Luciana Berger has been parachuted in as the Labour candidate for Liverpool Wavertree. Given the posh London image is being played down for the election, it was a tad embarrassing when the fact Luciana has swapped cars with her brother for the duration of campaign was revealed by the Mail on Sunday.

Her little black Yaris with 5k personalised numberplate clearly wasn’t cutting the mustard in down-town Liverpool


  1. 1
    totty watcher says:



  2. 2

    I would have thought a chav wagon like that would have been perfect


  3. 3
    WokinghamChris says:

    Black or red?


  4. 4
    Anonymous says:



  5. 5
    Euan Blair says:

    All Scousers are Thieves


  6. 7
    concrete pump says:

    Private plate, eh, on a Yaris.

    It wouldn’t just be scousers thinking she’s a prententious twat.

    I wonder what other types of turd polishing she likes.


    • 50
      Slotgob says:

      Private plate ?? Huh !! We’re used to having a private plane..


    • 125
      Germoloids says:

      The spacing on the number plate is illegal, but since when did politicians care about the law, it’s only for little people!


  7. 9
    Mathers says:

    It’s not a Yaris. It’s an Aygo.


  8. 10
    Tory Dan says:

    Just the usual champagne socialist lifestyle of those in the Inner Party.


  9. 11
    Gorfoons Blownit ruined all our lives says:

    do you have a pic of here in her little black no?


  10. 15
    Green shoots says:

    Ruin just used much stronger words on Womens Hour. Are the wheeels beginging to rattle or are the forces of hell being saved for a bad GE result?

    NuLabia may end up paying for the £11m


    • 37
      The IMF is coming says:

      Is it a set up for Gordon to save the day?
      ‘I have stood up to the Unions, even though they are our paymasters and string pullers. Would not be like this under the Tories’


      • 42
        Doctor Mick says:

        Somehow we’ll all survive jolly well without BA and its overpaid sozzled cabin crew.


        • 62
          jgm2 says:

          I’ve been flying Air France for years. Once you live outside of London you have to make a connection anyway so you might as well take a cheap European flight to avoid the 200 quid tax on your transatlantic leg.

          PLUS BA have sold off all their internal flights to FlyBe so you’re not even guaranteed your connections in the same way you used to be.

          BA failed to learn the lesson of Beeching from the railway closures (it was the branchlines that fed the mainlines). And Labour has taxed us off BA’s long haul flights onto cheaper European legs.

          Willie Walsh should be joining forces with O’Leary to point out that it is the Maximum Imbecile who has taxed UK aviation into oblivion.

          Because he’s an economic jackass.


          • Doctor Mick says:

            Last time I flew Air France was Paris to London some 20 years ago. They had no red wine on board. I could not fukcing believe it.


          • jgm2 says:

            If they had none on board then it may have been because I dr*nk the fucking lot. Although I liked the fact they used to give you champagne at 7am in the morning out of CDG. Just the fucking ticket after a heart nights libations on the Libreville flight


          • Minekiller says:

            They also run an open bar in all sections on the long haul from Jo’burg. Great airline. Vive Air France (though not so much KLM)


          • Brown is a c**t says:

            I took Air France business once, and never again. I would rather fly Ryanair than Air France business.

            Dirty, uninsterested staff, tired, lacklustre service, and that horrible sniffy French attitude that they seem to think is so cool yet the rest of us just think is c**tish.

            Yeah, at least with Ryanair, you know you are going to be treated like shit anyway.


      • 114
        Eggs Man says:

        thats the theory the reality will be a fucking disaster


    • 116
      Maximus M. Bacillus says:

      Even Brown’s Ballsedup Clostridium managed to mention on Toady the internal contradiction besetting Unite, going back to BOAC/BEA days when different unions were involved. There is still such rank animosity that the brothers cannot abide together in same room – it really is a blood feud internally. What this story needs is to join up with the one about Union Jack’s golden parachute into the Commons trough, and the witches cauldron will be complete.

      Admire the play of the light.


      • 138
        Minekiller says:

        Amazing, in the 80s the country had to endure a union led disaster for people who worked underground and now a quarter of a century later another union led disaster looms for people who work way above the ground….so this is how it will pan out….if the strike takes a grip and the government don’t take their union paymasters to task and the airline folds or undergoes severe contraction, then lots of union members will be laid off and then lost of other airlines will snap up BAs kit and routes. The same people will then apply for jobs with substantially less pay and benefits than they now enjoy. And with no union…

        So let me get this right. BA staff led by their fat cat union, which bankrolls Labour are striking to maintain (improve) pay and conditions in a market where they, the BA staff, enjoy among the best pay and conditions in the airline business. This is unbelievable. This has got to be contrived with the idea of ensuring it holds just enough for the Tories to detonate another post-election landmine, the failure of the national flag carrier. Its the BA staff that are the dupes here. The miners were too. I note Arthur didn’t lose out.


  11. 16
    udderly 'orrible says:

    O/T (sorry) But the Scottish Mafia/Purcell story ain’t going away…

    (Good thing too, the fallout damage should be liberally sprayed around the marginals. The Cons as per “Quote of the Day” are bowling very feebly.)


  12. 17
    The Court of Public Opinion says:

    One day the truth about how Liverpool became the “capital of culture” during the time of honest tony Bliar and his delightful Scouse wife will emerge.


  13. 18
    Anonymous says:

    P155 0FF isn’t a valid numberplate format

    It’d be P155 OFF in old style and I expect you can’t put an I in the 2nd position in the new style which it’d be then PI55 OFF

    Speaking of which – shows how well the economy is doing that I’ve not seen a single 10 reg which should have come out at the start of the month – they used to all get delivered on the 1st round here to people’s work so they could show off.

    oh, and it’ll be PI55 0FF if it was a postcode.


  14. 19
    Desperate Dan says:

    I wonder if she’s made the mistake of meeting Jonah Brown – like the misguided Sarkozy did last week on the eve of the French regional elections.


  15. 22
    angelnstar says:


    Hahaha, Boris calls Ed Balls an intergalactic ass! Boris sure has a way with words, lololol


    • 54
      DC - nob joke or knob joke? says:

      Boris has a way with balls as well – just ask the wives of his friends and his staff.


    • 57
      sockpuppet #4 says:

      So, in boris-land latin is a brilliant subject, but even he didn’t do it past O-level.


      • 92
        Doctor Mick says:

        What’s your point? He was bemoaning (the public school educated) Balls removing it from the school curriculuum as “elitist” in favour of meeja studies.


        • 111
          sockpuppet #4 says:

          It seems you just cannot read.
          Boris and balls didnt mention media studies.

          Boris did mention being eaten by canibals.
          You’d be better off learning a living language, or physics.


      • 140

        One of my Latin masters at school once described me (in my school report, no less) as ‘an egregious boor’.

        What a flatterer he was!

        Egregiousness is something I have held dear all my life, and were there more of us boorish types around, this country would be in much better shape.


      • 162
        angelnstar says:

        Of course Boris studied Latin past O Level! It’s me who did it to O Level, are you kidding me? Boris was a Kings Scholar at Eton School and then studied Classics at Balliol College, Oxford. what sort of nut job are you? (this last is only a joke)


  16. 23
    Catflap says:

    The Westminster village is now an inbred banjo playing fucking Commune.


  17. 25
    Rog says:

    Surely the most embarrassing thing for Luciana here is that she’s been outed as Sion Simon’s bird.

    She’ll never live that one down.


    • 31
      Doctor Mick says:

      At least she can still claim with some credibility to bea virgin


    • 49
      Engineer says:

      Shouldn’t he be done for cradle-snatching? In political terms, she’s barely out of nursery.


      • 60
        Freddy says:

        She used to be Euan Blairs bird but dumped him after he kept repeatedly trying to get in her back door. A typical red blooded Labour male just like his fathers cabinet.


    • 65
      bergen says:

      The joke will be on us when she’s elected.I assume that it’s a “pin a red rosette on a donkey”type of inner city Liverpool Labour constituency.


      • 77
        Engineer says:

        Normally, yes. This time, the Lib Dems may stand a fighting chance, and there’s the Party that must not be named, as well….


      • 123
        oldfella says:

        Wavertree is not an inner city part of Liverpool. It has working classs and middle class populations. It has not benefitted from the European City of Culture noticeably. Parts are still lovely but it needs some attention to bring it back to its glory of the 1960s……


  18. 26
    Doctor Mick says:

    Phoarr, I’d like to remove her hubcaps so’s I would.


  19. 29
    grdnon brwon compulsive liar says:

    we are the party of the people.

    the rich people.


    • 47
      Bob says:

      We are the bling bling ZanuLabour bust party

      Of thieves frauds and smearers..

      What a legacy..


    • 48
      DC - nob joke or knob joke? says:

      And we would like to extend a warm welcome to Dave and Georgie – they share our policies and they have the necessary wealth qualification for membership.


      • 71
        Naked Gordon says:

        Fuck off you piss stained troll prick.

        End of you rebutthead grandad nosher.


        • 152
          DC - nob joke or knob joke? says:

          Ah, the treatment of English as a foreign language, the uncontrollable temper – welcome back Dick Sniffin.


  20. 40
    Bring Back the swingometer chappie says:

    Absolutely no taste.

    Where are the fluffy dice, fern tree air fresheners and “I’ve seen the lions of Longleat” syicker?


  21. 43
    EU = Willkommen zum Vierten Reich! says:

    How strong is the Lib Dem presence in Liverpool Wavertree?

    Parachuting this posh bint into a gritty constituency like this one could backfire spectacularly for NuLabia…


  22. 44
    DC - nob joke or knob joke? says:

    This parachuting in candidates on unhappy local parties is disgraceful – so that rules out voting Labour or Tory.


  23. 53
    English Liberation Front says:

    Why would any half respectable female want to be associated with fat lo5er Sion Simon?????

    Here is an official announcement:

    The government today announced that it is changing its emblem from a Union Jack to a CONDOM because it more accurately reflects the government’s political stance. A condom allows for inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks, and gives you a sense of security while you’re actually being screwed.


  24. 55
    Sesachili says:

    Dozy tart on her blog claims that:
    “we could soon be seeing high speed trains at Lime Street, which are capable of travelling at 250mph. This is fantastic news for Liverpool, and I was thrilled that Alastair decided to come to celebrate this announcement.”

    According to the proposals published 11th March 2010 by the Department of Transport the Hybrid Bill covering the High Speed Link will not come to the Commons (if Labour are re-elected) until 2014. If passed, Construction would not start until 2019 and the line would not open to Birmingham until 2026! Liverpool, I would imagine would be at least 5 years after that.

    So “Soon” with Labour is 21 years hence!


    • 75
      Adolph Tarbuk says:

      Lime Street is the end of the line, the buffers etc so make sure you keep well the fuck out of the way when one of them fuckers comes hurtling in


    • 106
      Sir Reginald Titbrain says:

      Just shows the contempt these political aliens have for almost anybody. Like Brown on the Politics show espousing the bright new future that Nulab are investing in with all these Green Jobs and apprenticeships. Total bollocks as all of us know.

      This is a technique used to humour the old or half-witted, which are not the same, of course. Nurse finds some old codger whose shat himself, fallen out of bed and has been choking on his slippers for half an hour, smiles and and tells him he’ll soon be right as ninepence; since he’s on his last legs and nearly asphyxiated he says nothing she thinks she’s solved the problem. Confuses words with action, you see.

      BTW I notice Brown cured his jaw related problem. If the medication can be upped a little to stop it functioning altogether that would most welcome.


    • 127
      Anyone But Brown says:

      Standard Liebour policy. Announce it now as “soon”. You then have 16 years to constantly re-announce it. With a bit of creativity this could be announced 50 or 60 times (may be a little less to do so from opposition though)


    • 128
      Anyone But Brown says:

      And of you scroll further down her blog she visits a centre for Arab youths to ensure their social inclusion etc etc. Brave lady with her background.


    • 134
      Willsteed says:

      [‘I was thrilled that Alastair decided to come to celebrate this announcement.”’]

      Do you you think ‘Alasdair’ came all over her tits?


  25. 63
    earthshattering vehicular numberplate news says:

    staggering stuff


  26. 64
    Gordon Brown is a shit says:

    I enjoyed watching Brown get torn to shreds by members of the public on The Politics Show yesterday. I bet Mandelson regrets agreeing to the leaders debates. Cameron will make mincemeat of Brown.

    Forget what the polls say. The sheer anger I saw on display yesterday said it all. Labour is finished.


  27. 67
    Maladroit Labour Chump says:

    So Lu Berger has been Euan Bliar’s girlfriend and then moved on to Slimeon Simon ???

    Kin ‘ell !! She’s got absolutely no judgement at all !!!


  28. 68
    ong says:

    Looks like an illegal plate – the spacing is wrong


    • 94
      Flatcap Army says:

      talking to a policeman friend of mine a while back, he told me that coppers love illegally spaced plates – it gives them them due cause to pull the car over and go over it with a fine toothcomb, which always turns up at least one more serious crime


      • 101
        jgm2 says:

        The forces of evil don’t need any excuse to pull you over. The majority are just fishing expeditions to see if you reek of bo*ze when you wind down the window. Hence the huge failure rate of their random breathalyz*r tests. If people were being stopped for obvious dr*nk driving then you’d expect a 90% success rate.

        If you pass then they don’t have to perjure themselves that the reason they ‘suspected’ you were dr*nk was the terrific smell of bo*ze from your breath. However if you fail then suddenly the smell of bo*ze was overwhelming and vindicated by the machine.

        Fucking liars.

        Naaah. They’re 90% just random stops.

        Which, if folk gave a shit about civil liberties, should have us all up in arms. But we don’t. Hence 42 day detention without charge, abolition of double jeopardy, abolition of the right to silence and soon abolition of jury trials and compulsory ID cards.


      • 108
        Groucho says:

        Insurance, tax and MOT records can now be checked by the police in just a few seconds as they follow your car. This is the reason behind many of the stops that the police make.
        If you change insurer it takes a week or so for the database to be updated, so even if you are squeaky clean and driving legally, this can give the police a legitimate reason to stop you. Piss them off in any way and they will go over your vehicle with a fine toothed comb.

        Back on topic (sort of), the police should stop anyone with a vanity plate on sight and club them senseless for being so fucking stupid and lacking the imagination to do anything more worthwhile with their money than spending it on a pathetic ‘look at me’ plastic banner.


        • 110
          Yozzer says:

          the zipper on my Aero has a habit of scratching cars with private plates like hers, funny innit can’t imagine why it happens


          • Middle Englander says:

            You’ve got a zipper on a chocolate bar…


          • Anonymous says:

            Some kids obviously are too challenged to open a chocolate bar. Its clever of Nestle to put zippers on them. I wonder if they have velcro for kids too challenged to open a zipper?


  29. 73
    She can personalise MY numberplate any day says:

    She went out with Euan Blair, and now Comedy Sion? Does New Labour pass around former partners amongst themselves? That’s the closest they’ve come to socialism in the last 13 years.


    • 154
      DC - nob joke or knob joke? says:

      Sorry – are you implying Dave, Georgie et al are socialists because they shared Natalie around?


  30. 74
    stimpy says:

    In Labour terms a safe seat is the equivalent of being a ‘made man’ (or woman) in the Cosa Nostra


  31. 79
    QWERTY says:


    I’d buy the above one for the mong.


  32. 82
    Harridan Harpy says:

    I find these comments about Luciana most disgraceful and sexist! She is a candidate of integrity! And so is my husband! Enough with these petty remarks about him coming top in an all women shortlist. It’s not true I helped him carpetbag a safe Labour seat! I’m a genuine feminist and I haven’t sold out!

    P.S. I’d really appreciate your support when I stand for Labour leader after we lose the election. Thanks.


  33. 84
    Eileen Critchley says:

    V0TE 1NDY


  34. 86
    Sion Simon says:

    Rohypnol is a wonderful thing.


  35. 88
    thick as thieves says:

    mine is V0T3 LAB0UR


  36. 89
    Catflap says:

    For simplicity and because it is broadly true, they all agree on virtually everything, I will refer to the LibLabCons as ‘The party’.
    The ‘party’ now pervade every branch of government.Parish, Local and central governance is drawn on ‘party’ lines.Very few Independents.
    The Civil service is not independent and neither are the BBC nor any Public body it seems.
    This girl is a ‘Party’ member,that is all the ‘Party’ need to know.What you think has fuck all to do with it.
    Because the ‘Party’ now know you have no alternative.
    Want to know why you have stinking wheely bins?
    Because central ‘Party’ members told local ‘Party’ members to jump, and they responded”How High?”.


    • 102
      Catflap says:

      I used wheely bins as an example,I could also include wind turbines and Eco towns where I live.All foisted on my local community by a CONSERVATIVE council.
      An independent local or county council would have told central government to fuck off with this environmental bollocks.


    • 130
      Anonymous says:

      Yup. Vote anything but LibLabCon.


    • 148
      Ronny from Donny says:

      Vote English Democrat in Donny north to wipe the smile from Milliband’s face.

      Get ready Eddy


  37. 90
    Flatcap Army says:

    That’s an Aygo, Guido. And it’s pink. Silly tart, though – they’re not called “vanity plates” for nothing


  38. 104
    I hate New Labour says:

    And yet still the thick scousers will vote for her, because she isn’t a ‘tory toff’.


    • 160
      Pub Bloke says:

      She’ll go off her plebby new putative constituents once they’ve chopped her vanity-plated Eygo in for a week’s worth of Vim-enhanced Charlie.


  39. 115
    gildedtumbril says:

    Another drongo carpetbagger parachuted into a labour craphole.


  40. 121
    Nick says:

    Totty ! You’ve filed this under Totty !
    I wouldn’t touch it with yours!


    • 137
      Willsteed says:

      In the pic she looks like a bag-lady. What a total wreck!

      Her and Sion Simon?… ideal couple. Like a couple of tramps on a park bench.


  41. 143
    Dave says:

    Luciana has at least one big fan in Liverpool: fellow zionist and Israel-firster, Louise Ellman MP.

    They look after other members of their tribe. Perhaps we celts and anglo-saxons should start doing the same?


    • 150
      Anonymous says:

      The “celts & anglo-saxons” in the HoC & HoL have been looking after themselves (at taxpayers expense) for years. Your suggestion,though well meant,is not needed and we will continue to carry on as usual with our troughing.


  42. 146
    Despairing of Leeds says:

    Shock, horror! An illegally spaced numberplate. I trust the old Bill is watching …


  43. 147
    Cockney Christian says:

    Wasn’t ‘my arse’ Jim Royle going to stand against her? I hope he does I’d vote for him.


  44. 158
    toddy from walton says:

    all this anti liverpool stuff just shows how many gobshites and dickheads post here.


  45. 171
    Lion of England says:

    First to the !being who looks like a girl/woman? or is it some one in drag with a
    potato bag that she has on,
    second can we not,sterilize all of Lab-our so we can save the country, and
    definately B-lair familly,and browns so they will become EXTINCT.


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