Just under a year ago Cheryl Cole had tea at Number 10 with Jonah. It wasn’t long before rumours spread of her troubled relationship with footballer hubby Ashley Cole. Last night we heard they are to split up. There was nothing she could do to stop her fate.
The Curse of the One-Eyed Son of the Manse had struck again.
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Lord Lamont told ITV News…
“I think the PM is just human and Ed Balls is a pretty irritating person”
Is it cos I is black?
Were they comparing notes on beating up typists and nightclub attendants?
They were consulting on the best forms of anger management.
Everything that Hunt touches turns to dust !
Just notices Cheryl Cole signed the petition to stop the PM Bullying in the workplace.
http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/09Bullying/
Funny No10 at its best again by deleting the number of signatures each day.
what are the chances of the Cole being the only person to visit Brown this year
SPOOOOOKY!!!
Yeah. And Gordon is a bit of a lady’s front bottom too!
The how come Ashley hasn’t?
Do you have to have a criminal record to be photographed with the Sociopath Thug Brown ?
McBride is back
http://twitter.com/BBCLauraK/status/9570184182
Is the BBC paying him our license money to spout such lies and rubbish? And why?
The curse started 11th December 2008. Ashley Cole and Gordon Brown met up for the No To Knives Coalition Launch. It’s on Gordon’s website, they have even spelt Cole’s name wrong as ‘Asley’.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/downingstreet/3100010787/
No.
She’s a WAG CHAV…ot CHAV WAG…not sure…
Says it all really
And a real ZanuLabour supporter…
Couldn’t make it up….
Why is she famous ?
Was she naked on the Tele or something important like that ?
She’s famous for singing badly, beating up a nightclub attendant, then marrying a footballer.
Great role model and all that!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/3321458/Girls-Aloud-singer-pays-price-for-throwing-a-drunken-punch.html
Of course she is a labour supporter, she’s from up geordieland an that eh.
They do not understand politics, or policy or anything like that. All they know is on polling day put a cross next to the labour candidate or god will kill your parents/children/pets/ It is a mindless, unthinking, un-reasoning religion to those fuckers.
I’d like to know why she advertises that we need to “Get a leaf” for our hair!
Silly moo!
You are famous for having beaten up a “toilet attendant” FFS a
And allegedly calling the female attendant a “Carinnean jigaboo”…
Could not make this up
Another real ZanuLabour female thug………..
Karist….you really can’t make this shit up…
Glad that the lovely Cheryl finds her way into even this blog. Less politics and economics; more celebrity love-ins. Hurrah!
Wonder if this will warrant a mention at the start of PMQs – will it be before or after the names of the fallen in Afganistan?
I’m sure Brown will be desparate to offer his condolences at this difficult time and hope that their privacy is respected (until the full details are published in an exclusive multi-million pound magazine deal).
There is a big Political content here as McStalin/Bean pledged £2m of our money to help with Malaria in Tanzania.
Was that country ever part of Empire? Commonwealth? WTF has it got to do with us.
Bizarre. Whenever he gets a photo-opportunity he gets the cheque book out! Not his though.
That’s Brown all over. Every budget the same. ‘Pledge’ 20 million here, 20 million there. Meanwhile his deficits are of the order of 10′s of billions. A factor of 1000 times greater. Now of course they are in the hundreds of billions.
He relies on the numerical blindness of the electorate for his continuing idiocy. Millions, billions – what’s the difference?
2 million quid (at present rates of cash burning) is just five or six minutes of squandering. It probably took him longer top announce squandering the money than it does for him to fucking well burn it.
Tanzania was part of the Empire after WWI under an LoN mandate.
Boring but true.
Poor girl.
Doomed no matter which way you look at it.
Met the Prime Wankstain and married a scumbag footballer.
She needs to smarten up her choices in life.
I’m free.
She’s all yours mate…wouldn’t touch the old slapper with a sterilized bargepole.
Scrub off all that slap and she’s a dog…woof, woof!!!!
I’m not free, but am very reasonable!
She could just “Get a leaf” for her life!
Gordon associates himself with someone else prone to the odd outbreak of violence against junior staff I see…
Crikey Steve give the girl a break can’t you see how broken up she is over this – not.
You have her confused with Nokia Naomi…
Nope!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1443763/Girl-singer-punched-lavatory-attendant-in-eye-after-row.html
Please Guido lets not get started on the Cole vs Cole saga. Who side will Max Cliffod be on? Who pays the most?
Max is too busy with that woman Pratt.
The way things are going at present in the Media Max has the fastest growing business in the UK. His client list is growing by the second.
Shes almost Scottish. Should be a minister.
Brown showed Cheryl what a real man is like. Treat ‘em rough, slap ‘em about a bit, that’s what they want innit?
Who can forget the Hewitt backhand incident, that”ll teach the bitch to sneak up on his blind side, in future !
From the front, then?
Brown is really into fisting so recent reports suggest!
Ahah!
Thus was Guido’s long anticipated rant against the money power posted. Let this day ring in infamy. Weds 24 February 2010.
The day the (fat) worm turned on it’s masters.
Well done son! Knew you wouldn’t let us down with the usual boring tabloid twaddle! Top drawers!
you play with fire you get burnt, said Confusionas.
Man who put carrot and pee in same pot very unsanitary
man who eat carrot after being in piss pot needs head examining.
Man who have little bit of “How your father?” on side of hill definitely not on level!
My dogs are the most important thing to me. Unfortunately most of them have resigned.
I’m also a very worried, because Gordon wished Happy New Year to the Chinese.
If the whole of China become affected by the Jonah curse in, that truly will be world melt down time.
You seem better at predicting things than the Met Office.
O/T: British justice, it sometimes works
http://uk.news.yahoo.com/21/20100224/tuk-police-commander-assaulted-in-jail-6323e80.html
A bucket of shit over the head of …well.. a shithead.
Hope they off the bastard.
And how come he still ‘could’ be sacked from the Met within weeks. Has no politician/high-ranking policeman spotted that he has been found guilty and is in jail. If I may, as an atheist, quote from the Bible. Jesus wept.
But Darzei was quite happy to fit up an innocent man and send him to jail for potentially the same treatment.
Fuck him. He should have his own personal link to my septic tank and be woken every morning by a curry-inspired shit followed by a deluge of asparagus and MSG scented piss the nasty bastard.
And still too fucking good for him.
And Cameron should pointedly not be ruling out pursuing Labour MPs for fraud on a massive scale regarding the nations finances. I’d like top see the entire Labour party jailed for life for their wilful, idiotic destruction of the UK economy.
I am prepared to put my health at risk consuming enough curry and booze to ensure a sufficient supply of effluent to toss over the worthless c*nts every morning to wake them up in their cell.
This high ranking police officer has now been moved to a “soft” jail in Suffolk because he was subjected to abuse by other prisoners in Wandsworth. He got exactly what he deserved by being given a custodial sentence, and he should have been made to serve out that sentence in Wandsworth. If he had been anyone else, he would have had to stay there. The very fact that he was found guiilty should have automatically lost him his job, and the very generous pension which went with it. Why is it that no matter what these people do, they will still be rewarded?
Labour. We look after our own.
two twats with a combined IQ of 25.
You misplaced the decimal point 2.5
The problem is it will take longer for A Holes broken foot to mend given the less amounts of Physio. Then again maybe not.
Even with one eye you can somehow collect loads of postal votes ….
What a Man,
for a Power freak,
he always knows Nuffink
Nuffing to do with me
betcha know nothing about
Hollie Grieg and reporter Robert Green
as well
as if
Let’s face it, anyone stupid enough and unpleasant enough to accept an invitation to tea with Brown is probably so screwed up that their chance of a successful marriage must be cloes to zero!
Good point. It begs the question who would want to accept an invite from our great leader.
Just glad you didn’t mention what I got up to with my pet one-eyed snake in days of olde……….
Who is in charge or “organising” postal votes in the ZanuLabour Party ??
Let’s denounce them by name….
Gordon Brown?
Cheryl Cole? Who gives a shit, really? Apart from the BBC, that is.
Good day to bury more bullying stories.
After all the darling of ITV is such an important cultural icon and her husband is a role model for all
Agreed, the real football news is that Warnock is going to fuck off to QPR with three of Palace’s best players.
That’s after we demolish Villa tomorrow night.
If you show up tomorrow night Villa will win by a walkover. The match is this evening.
And Villa will win.
And a couple of million chavs whos lives revolve around these overpaid morons.
It’s been an amazing journey.
Imagine what I’d look like, like without make-up
John Terry will be around to comfort you later.
Pure Gold jgm2 – Terry’s All Gold.
Just seen the Mentalist on Sky and wow!! see them bags under his eyes, even with slapper style makeup he looked like a fukin panda.
tick tock tick tock gordon gonna blow his top.
Just watched it too. The fucker has got more drugs in him than Boots The Chemist.
If he was a dog you would do the humane thing and have him put down. Where’s there a good vet when you need one.
“Just under a year ago Cheryl Cole had tea at Number 10 with Jonah.”
Come now Quido, that’s really stretching Jonah’s powers a bit…
Surely not everyone he’s ever touched is cursed?
Oh…
I think it is more to do with the one-eyed thing in Ashley’s pants not the one in No 10.
Ashley cole was once accused of having a vibrating Nokia shoved up his arse by another chap (its true google it)
Could it be that the accursed one had a “tangerine moment” and mistook Mr Cole for a secretary?
There’s more than one of us you know fat boy!
How’s life as a government censor anyway? Faux opposition good eh? How’s the book coming? Been a while now… must be getting really good huh?
I sat on it by mistake
He has MacCursed the future of the country itself and MacDoomed our grandchildren to a debt mountain all of his own making……
He has single-handledly MacCrushed our armed services and Chavez and chums are now ready to take on the three squaddies and two tanks we have left to protect the Falklands……
He is almost as bad as ole Devil Eyes himself.
Time for Gordon MacBully to praise himself……
As my granny used to say – if you are going to sup with the Devil you need a bloody long spoon
There seems to be an unending list of NuLabour thugs, rentboys, liars, thieves, frauds and assorted fiddlers..
And claiming to be the contrary…
MI5,you omitted renters of boys from your list.
Yes….and I told the public to vote Labour at the next election as a favour to my new best friend…..Gord
on Friday I became Team GB’s first individual Olympic Winter Games gold medallist for 30 years and the first woman individual gold medallist for 58 years.
I did all this without a word of encouragement or good luck from our beloved Prime Mentalist who probably had never heard of me or Skleleton Sliding.
After the Gold medal ceremony Gordon rang me up and congratulated me on my achievement. On hearing his voice, I fell off the chair, fell down the stairs, cracked my ribs, lost an arm and a leg which triggered a chain saw which ran over my poor mam and left her in stitches.
Now that is funny. Congrats Amy.
Did he wish the Ladies Curling Team good luck. They were supposed to be shit-hot favourites? Well done, Amy, both in winning and avoiding the curse!
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/othersports/winter-olympics/7301119/Winter-Olympics-2010-Britains-women-curlers-out-after-6-5-defeat-to-Canada.html
I think the Curling team bar one are all scots so likely in some form or fashion the curse struck again.
Well done Amy great post
I love the Nokia ad on this blog Guido…
I hope they are paying you a lot to run it…
After all..You have made Mad Mcbroon use of it as a weapon world famous…
One famous slapper meets another.
Oh dear. Wasn’t Beckham in No 10 very recently. Oooooops.
‘Right-to-die’ campaigner Debbie Purdy criticised Gordon Brown for showing a “lack of respect” to the British people after the Prime Minister warned against legalising assisted suicide.
I would like to be the first to volunteer to assist with his sir. I have a few ideas that will get the job done.
I would not wait for suicide. I would commit hoonicide!
Book all the Labour fuckers on a one-way trip to Switzerland. We may get a group discount.
radio 5 mcbride: i didnt brief against darling!
I am not sure on the time line here (it’s an age thing) but wasn’t McPoison gone before this spat?
What happened to him fucking off and getting a proper job?
He’d better fucking not be back!
Many reports suggest McBride has been working for Gordon behind the scenes. His fingerprints are all over lots of stuff recently.
bunkerbrown and sarah are rather like groupies aren’t they? – forever chasing after anything with a celebrity labelled attached to it and then posturing themselves like gormless fans for a photo op.
They are completely undiscerning about the the quality of the celebs that they chase, anyone will do as long as they claim to be famous!
Slightly off topic, but when is Alistar Darling going to do a Geoffery Howe on Brown?
That would be yesterday evening.
And still no sign of Milidolt or the Torturer’s Apprentice in these serial denials.
No. It’s odd, that. Milipede is usually one of the first to leap to Brown’s defence. He is conspicuous by his absence.
Some people are giving hints that something interesting will happen this sunday. I don’t know what though. And Guido is more interested in Cheryl Cole than Alistair Darling.
Even Nick Robinson is avoiding the standard BBC line this week – he and Crick have both been very critical of the PM as the bullying story has unfolded.
There has to be something they know about this that we don’t, they are good friends of Rawnsley and must have either read the book or know what is coming this weekend.
Election called today for March 25th?
I have just seen a pig fly past my window, he will hold on until the last possible moment, and will still be carried out kicking and shouting it was not me, it all started in america….
He’s caught between a rock and a hrad place – as usual. He leaves the election as late as possible – Darling has to have a budget which, if not serious at cutting the deficit, will see Gilt yields explode, sterling disaapear into the ether with the inevitable effect of the economy.
If he got any sense at all – silly me! – he’d go RIGHT NOW. We’re in the eye of the economic hurricane and nobody knows when the back end of it is going to hit.
I can answer that one
it’s you giving hints that something interesting is happening sunday
is it that it follows saturday ?
Politicians bleating away about bullying, why is it then that they need government whips to keep M P’s in line, or is that not bullying?
Heaven forbid old boy its stimulated persuasion, its not bullying.
Bullying is when you metaphorically beat your subordinates to relive stress and to prove your dominance to yourself and of course get your own way, a bit like Maggie Thatcher!
…and who did she bully?
look up the thread – she was convinced of assaulting a nightclub attendant in 2003, got community service.
Good company for Gordon to keep – maybe they discussed violence in the workplace, something of which they both have a lot of experience!!
Was she serviced in the community?
Cor yes they was the days, I miss the sound of screaming pain and crunching bone.
Operations are much sticker these days tho, landed a bit heavy on some spads noddle after dodging some particularly heavy boogie flack, had to bale again I’m afraid.
We can’t go on like this I don’t think it will hold together much longer Squadron Leader….
Labour could recruit a secret weapon for the next general election – national treasure Cheryl Cole.
The Girls Aloud star has said in an interview she supports Gordon Brown, and party chiefs want her to help attract young votes.
The interview in Vogue says: “Cheryl Cole could probably swing an election … she is a Brown voter, by the way, not Cameron.”
X Factor judge Cheryl, 25, has never forgiven David Cameron for saying he fancied her. She said: “He was just trying to be cool.”
Cheryl Cole is a very rich lady who has to pay quite a lot of tax, I imagine.
Get the gist….?
Very rich people pay NO TAX in Gordon’s UK. Only ‘the little people’ pay tax on their earnings. Haven’t you learnt anything in the last 13 years?
They say you learn something new every day.
Today I learnt that there’s a footballer called Ashley Cole, and he’s got a wife called Cheryl.
Jesus. Does anyone give a fuck?
You lead a very sheltered existence. When is the next flight to Mars?
Having said that you right in that probably not many people give a f*ck.
Anonymous, “You called my son?” – “Well, ever since the maintanance of the Pearly Gates was put out to PFI tender by Brown then his ticket downstairs was assured.”
I think there are a lot of people who give a fuck about these celebrities – they are called thick Chavs and now form possibly about 80% of this cesspit country.
Hasn’t he cursed Greece too?
“David Cameron. Brrrrr. Slippery isn’t he?” she says.
“We’ve always been Labour in our family, it just feels wrong not to be. Better the devil you know.”
What a good judge of character Cheryl Cole seems to be!
Don’t think about the shit state of the country, or its bleak, even shittier future, look over there instead, it’s a celebrity.
To: Guido plus Mrs Guido,
You are cordially invited for tea and PHOTO OP at No 10,
on Friday, 13 March 2010.
Leave your Nokias at the door.
Cordially,
Gordo Jonah
Friday is the 12th. & the 13th. is a Saturday. Try confused.com.
It’s a blessing really. She’s free to start going out with me now.
Somebody (paranormal research?) should really investigate this man and the masses of Jonah type incidents. It really is very spooky – and very worrying for this country if the mong gets back in power.
Ha hahah this is so funny! Because Gordon really does blight anything and everyone that he meets and wishes well. She was cursed!
http://cyberboris.wordpress.com/2010/02/18/joke-for-the-day/
Latest quote from Calamity Brown (in an interview published in Shortlist):
“I would have loved to have been a football manager. It’s a great idea, isn’t it, to be able to manage people and get a great team. But I can’t do that, so I’ve got shares in Raith Rovers”
that is what you get for hanging around with idiots