Jonah Curses Morgan’s Viewing Figures
There was a lot of hysterics concerning Gordon’s appearance on Piers Morgan’s Life Stories last night with talk about it having “cut through” beyond politics. Evidence based blogging tells the real story. The Prime Mentalist was the least popular guest, bar Boris Becker, to ever appear on the show and be reduced to tears by Morgan’s gentle probing:
The widely trailed interview was meant to be a chance for the public to see Gordon’s human side. The fact that almost double the amount of people cared more about the life of Jordan or Sir Cliff Richard shows just how far he is willing to demean the status of his office for a couple of thousand swing votes…
Still 3.8 million cockwidgets out there though
We’re all watching repeats of Michael Portillo’s railway journeys together.
Mrs 11 Weeks and I had to choose betwen watching the cat wash its arse or McMental on the TV. Given that they both involved a dumb animal and arse licking, we decided to save the electricity.
3.8 MIllion viewers ?
I’m sure they are gutted with that in Downing Street
Katherine Jenkins is on the list.
She has great tits.
can you put a picture of her for the Telegraph readers here?
Stop press
Prescott spotted in Lincolnshire
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/lincolnshire/8515737.stm
@Lord Old Holborn
Haha… Did witnesses say the perpetrator try to speed away in 2 Jaguars? (One for each buttock?)
I deliberately did not watch one second of that fucking bong-eyed Huhne !
When will he get it no phucker cares about him !
Out of the 3.8 million who did – 3.79 million had to go out & buy new TV’s after putting their foot through his fking ugly face !
Wayne Trombone: Yes, upstanding, and ample upholstery. Pity about the voice, though.
Wise choice, although in my case McBlubber was successfully blanked by avoiding all news bulletins (particularly the Beeb) so that stress and blood pressure levels remained under reasonable control.
The fact is I simply can’t watch this Hoon (or Bliar come to that) without alternating between a stream of bad language and the urge to throw up whenever either of these mendacious little prats appear. Mrs J is definitely not amused.
Is Mrs J Samantha?
Katherine Jenkins – isn’t she the buxom Welsh songstress who turns out at Welsh Rugby Internationals wearing a tight red rugby shirt with the word “Brains” emblazoned across her hooters?
Cameron vows to resign when David Cameron’s Conservatives lose the next General Election.
I will be pleased to see to see the back of that upper class hoon
Oh dear Martin, showing your true colours again – ‘chippy’ and full of hang ups.
Sort yourself out man!
Martin Day is clearly a tit. He has nothing to do but spend all day interspersing comments on this board with messages such as ‘vote labour’ etc etc. What a ‘dumbed down’ ninny he is – a typical miserable, childish leftie and a bad loser to boot.
To coin a phrase “I am as happy as David Cameron in a field of shit”
God, dont you just hate those awkward questions you get after sex? You know the ones:
“How was that for you?”
“When will I see you again?”
And:
“Where am I and why am I chained to this wall?!”
Your right hand can talk?
What a smarmy wan*er you are Martin – are you sure you’re not the Meddlesome Miss Mandy masquerading as a member of the public?
You are a liability to the labour party if you are in any way representative of their voters.
It does put a smile on my face though!
Martin Day said “God, dont you just hate those awkward questions you get after sex? You know the ones:”
Martin I suspect you very rarely have sex if at all. Nobody actually says “how was it for you” did you get that idea from something you read ?
I just read Guidos about us page and Martin day has come under the criteria for banning.just waiting for Guido to see it and it’s toodlepip Marty.
Afternoon, Jonty. How’s life post ‘Master Baiter’?
@Martin the Martian
Personally, I’ve always preferred people with “class” to those with “no class”
so you rather have dried up male would be spinster from the manse what normal man gets married ist time at 50
I watched the series first time around, it was a very good programme, although I admit Portilo is a bit wodden, he comes across as a good egg
The Death tax Swindle
A post on thisismoney.com
This is not set to hit middle income at all; it is set to target lower working class people who have exercised thrift all of their lives so that they would have a house paid for when they get old. It is sinister and morally outrageous. It is not even to pay for the elderly care; it is for the profligate policies of New Labour.
If we can afford to keep asylum seekers in luxury accommodation then we can afford to pay for care for the elderly. If we can’t afford the latter then we most certainly cannot afford the former.
Absolutely spot on methinks
Hear hear
It’s to keep the ponzi scheme going now that “green taxes” are losing their legs. This lot will be ready for the grave themselves when the scam fully comes to light so they dont give a monkeys.
I wonder how many of those viewers were people who tried to hold their dinners down long enough to watch it all, just so they could blog about how utterly disgusting the whole thing was?
VOTE LABOUR
If you hate the UK.
If you want this country ruled by unelected foreign commissars.
If you like war crimes committed in your name.
if you like a 200 billion pound annual deficit.
If you like a 1.4 trillion pound national debt
If you like Schools turning out pregnant fuckwits that cannot even read.
If you like schools pushing gay and ped-o-phile lifestyles as being acceptable and normal.
If you like soldiers being sacrificed for lack of adequate kit.
If you like worker’s pensions being ransacked.
If you like Worker’s having their income tax doubled.
If you like British worker’s have their jobs taken by foreign immigrants because the EU allows employers to pay immigrants LESS than this country’s minimum wage, if they come from a country that has a lower minimum wage than us.
If you like poor families run into financial hardship by the incompetent implementation of tax-credits.
If you like the Government tracking and monitoring every tiny aspect of your life.
If you like the ID cards, children’s database, health database and the other massively expensive databases that ONLY pry into your private lives, but fail to deliver ANY safety benefit.
If you like rank incompetence, corruption and leaders who exploit their own dead kids for electoral advantage.
If you like these things, Vote Labour.
If you like these things, you are a sick FUCK!
therefore ONLY sick-fucks vote labour.
That’s me.
I cannot see a problem with anything on your list.
Socilaism for-ever – whether you like it or not that is what you have now in Team GB.
Mission accomplished for Labour!
So, you admit to being a total and complete twat of the worst kind, a total sick fuck, dead in the head fuckwit, revelling in the abuse and deaths of children? At least you are honest about it.
Gordon and Sarah Brown are the Fred and Rosemary West of British politics, ruthlessly exploiting the death of their own child for their perceived political advantage.
Sick sick sick!
labour has never really helped the working class it exploits them to keep power
Ha ha.
If your not bitter… give this guy a hug.
Only sick-fucks are this bitter. He needs help.
MARTIN IS RIGHT LISTEN TO MARTIN!
VOTE LABOUR – VOTE TORTURE
MILIBAND WILL DO HIS BEST TO COVER IT UP
LOVELY
DEAD ARABS TICK
TORTURE TICK
DEATH AND OCCUPATION TICK
WE TICK ALL THE RIGHT BOXES – MAKE SURE YOU TICK THE RIGHT BOX
VOTE OFTEN
VOTE LABOUR
How many of the 3.8 million live in care homes and were unable to turn the telly over or people watching the show routinely despite who the guests are?
The figures show a lot of people switched off.
Ha Ha.
Some of us avoid switching on for that rubbish in the first place.
Eureka. I have found the solution to Labour
Dynamite Alf.a bit of an upgrade from guidos
saw the twat on the news smiling again (or think it was a smile) bad AC`s orders no doubt “smile Gordo smile” can the relevent programs pls issue a warning 1st as was eating me dinner and was sick all over the dog sorry Nelson
Is it safe to come out now ??
Eh, mate! It was car-crash television!
Don’t assume 3.8m watchers = 3.8m supporters
Some of us watched out of morbid curiosity, wanting to see the death of a Political Career before their very eyes!
I am looking forward to the election night coverage of that death.
Shame it will only be the death of the political career though, and not the death of the politician himself!
How many people would pay to watch Brown’s death, live on pay-per-view?
I know I would.
A lot.
Even more, if he was screaming in agony and begging for forgiveness immediately prior to death.
I actually enjoyed it as it was an opportunity to see Gordon in a completely new light. Sarah was the real star.
Star as in when you watch a documentary about serial killers you mean, the star of those shows being a depraved sick in the head child killer, that kind of star?
You’re clearly a very sick puppy days away from total mental breakdown.
Seek medical attention
Nurse! The screens!
swing votes?
Indeed, beware of those postal votes in the marginals!
..Banana Republic, eh?
Gives me a nice, little, Photoshopping idea (including our 9-a-day man :O)
Yes have a squint at #pm on twitter, plenty of vomiting there.
I watched because it was the death act of a ham,and I love watching death scenes by hams,
The interview with Morgan was pre recorded and therefore any supposed reference to this poor child’s demise should have been cut. This ignorant oaf has chosen to expose us to this sickening exhibition in the hope it gains him some votes. He has tried to exploit his own child’s death for political gain thereby making a mockery of her short life.
He is beneath contempt. he is an utter arsehole
His minders told him to do it
You mean his carers !
whoever it was are ducking nokias
Agree with Englishman completely.
How many re-takes did it take to get just the right balance of emotional tears without a full breakdown? How many takes did it take to get Sara looking just the right amount of sympathetic? She still managed to fuck it all up with a bad,y timed glance at the camera to check they were filming her “sincere” grief.
The whole thing was scripted and choreographed and acted.
That both parents of their child could act so cynically in the ruthless exploitation of their dead child fills me with revulsion.
They are the Fred and Rosemary West of politics.
Disgusting, repellent, abhorrent, appalling, there are not sufficient words in the English language with which to describe this one-eyed son of the manse.
It really is too depressing but with so many millions longing to be one of Jeremy Kyle’s subjects who knows how many votes it will be worth.
…noisome, foul, retch-making, mephitic, unpardonable, beneath contempt, ghastly, vile, hyper-cynical, rebarbative, banausic, filthy, noxious, toxic, methane-ridden, stercorous, shit-smitten, turdy, vaporous, pus-filled, pox-ridden, lousy, scabby, eruptive, eructaceous, leprous…
[There's a few more - & I haven't even seen the Programme!]
hello speeedo shorts
how are things at the bottom of the pond with all the other scum?
No wonder they released the earlier clips, otherwise the audience would have been eveb smaller.
“Bizarrely enough, none of the ‘heavyweight’ Tory blogs: ConservativeHome, Iain Dale or Guido Fawkes, bothered to say anything about the massive blunder.”
54% or 3.8 million? You decide. It quite easily be 5.4% or 38 million. The truth is all in the decimal point.
I’ve never voted Tory… because they release reports based on made-up facts and misplaced decimal points.
Tory blunder goes unnoticed once again.
A decimal point is nothing compared to selling the memory of your dead child for a few votes.
You sound desperate.You say you have never voted Tory… tell me this,how do
you feel when you look at history and see that everytime a Labour govt has been kicked out by the electorate the country has been left on it’s knees.
face facts EVERY labour Govt has fucked up the country without fail,they allways do,it’s taken longer to get rid of them this time because they were left
a golden inheritance by the Torys.
People who vote labour are born with the idiot gene.
Not seen the advert today then?
Thankfully Labour can do their sums thats why the economy is in such tip top shape eh !
No the one that says; I’ve never voted Tory before… because I can see straight through posh people trying to con me.
What’s wrong with posh people?
“I can see straight through posh people trying to con me.”
Tell me about Cherie & Tony, George.
If you voted New Labour, I think you need to get your eyesight checked.
The trick is to spot ALL politicians who try to con you, not just the blue ones.
Beaten by Richard Madley: “Sarah… hand me the pistol!”
“Amount of people”? Are you thick?
“Number of people” please.
Well, he is mental…
Guido, WTF with the TottyWatch tag? Is there something we should know?
Katherine Jenkins got 1.2 million more viewers than Gordoom. That’s good enough for a totty watch tagline.
Mind you, Katie Price got even more, so you have to question the taste of the viewing public.
Definately. Katherine Jenkins is quite top totty. Not in the Fiona Bruce division but a serious contender for the play offs.
And she takes it up the arse for coke, an all round top girl.
I’d like to referee them both in the final, to be honest.
http://newsimg.bbc.co.uk/media/images/40104000/jpg/_40104963_point_pa_203.jpg
Heyyyy, there was nothing forged about those pictures, honest.
It was OBVIOUS to any serving or former soldier that these were faked pics.
Piers always was a class A1 twat!
I resent that. I’m not a twat but I am a total and utter fuckwitted, bastard Huhne.
We remember always.
We will remember you for a long time Piers.
He’s an “arrogant name dropping” A1 Twat as well
On the Social-ist
It was obvious to non-soldiers that they were fake
We agree with Piers, we don’t care if the pictures are fake or not, we hate the bastard British forces, remember how we gave away their attack on Goose Green during the Falklands war (we couldn’t stop laughing for week sin the BBC news office with that one) oh and then we let slip the fantastic Argentine air force were not arming their bombs correctly (we really wanted them to kill more British vermin so Thatcher would be thrown out of power, we at the BBC have never forgiven ourselves for not selling the British forces down the river on that)
Quite right. Let’s have an inflation-busting, telly-tax rise..
Never mind, the Beeb, you got back at the tories via Doctor Who didn’t you? [A tradition you appear to be maintaining still]
LINK: BBC Left Wingers: We Are So Crass We Are Happy To Get Back At The Tories Through Da Kidz
There was a bungie cord attached to his nokia the whole way through the interview.
Is it correct that the one eyed sone of the Manse called the English rugby team before the game with Italy, and Scotland before the game with Wales but luckily Dave called the English team afterwards so they squeeked a win. I think we should be told.
Not watched any of the Piers Morgan interviews, don’t intend to change just to see some electioneering, but do wonder how busy they were in the bunker last night analysing figures with a view to picking the best election date
Oh, and slightly confused as to how 5.8m is “almost double” 3.8m.
What surprises me is that anyone in the bunker thought that Brown welling up on television would win him votes. Piers Morgan’s demographic will happily accept (nay expect) people crying when they get voted off talent/reality shows – but from a serving Prime Minister? It’s just toe-curlingly embarrassing.
What the bunker fails to understand is that nobody would give a shit about Brown’s temperament, demeanour or appearance IF HE WAS GOOD AT HIS JOB. Saturday just made him appear lacking in self-control and, by extension, control of his duties.
Fecking human side?
That knob is about as human as Joe 90 and that’s insulting a puppet who’s strings you could see!
Erm, might that not have a tiny wee something to do with the whole thing having been trailed about a billion times before the actual programme aired?
It’s almost as if someone doesn’t want us to dwell on at least two egregious Tory mess-ups in the course of 24 hours ….
We learnt how to manage the “grid” from a master
Brown’s TV appearance was a “God-send” . I don’t know who’s advising him but keep up the good work !!!
I’m on your side
I’m confused as to how the 4.9 million that Osborne is ‘almost double’ the 3.8 million that Brown got.
Some Jonah style adding up there.
Who mentioned Osbourne? Guido stated Jordan or Sir Cliff Richard.
Either way, this was a ratings flop.
The thing is Guido he will not get a ‘couple of thousand swing votes’ because the public have seen through this disgraceful interview with Piss Morgan and have been sickened by his manipulation of emotion for apparent gain.
So there you have it left-wing nuts, Richard Madeley would be a more popular leader than the fat Scottish cyclops.
Tell me Gordon, was it worth disrespecting the memory of your dead child for 3.8m viewers?
some watched it just to see the fat Huhne faking live
Ian Brady would be a more popular leader than McMental.
Very good band
I now think that McMental dropped the babyeeeeeee on its head and that is why he can now use her as a vote prop.
Sarah says to hi Gordon, please hold baby while I adjust my nightdress.
It’s a bit dark in ere Darling, Please don’t what babeee >Child Benefit, Tax Credits, campaign against Blair check) ok Sarah pass her over. Oh dear looks like you made a stupid mistake Sarah you could see I wasn’t ready to hold Baby yet. Bloody Tory party cuts if it wasn’t for them the floor would have been carpeted in here. I blame them, no=w not a word of this the Doctors I will give a stonking pay rise nobody will know you handed me the baby when you should nee av
Brown putting his family as political props it is no holds barred now, live by the sword hopefully die by the sword Brown you fkg Huhne
how do you feel being as much of a scumbag as speeedo shorts?
Hows the advice feel now Gordy.And throwing that Nokia won’t change things
And doesn’t he have bigger tits and arse than Katie Price.
Thats as maybe, but no one, repeat no one, has a bigger arse than the future Lady Blair of Liverpool. And her husband must be in with a chance of winning the “male boobs of the year” award.
Baroness Blair of Liverpool even. The title Lady is for the wife of a Sir.
Otherwise, all correct, as you were, carry on…
Do you know what, I got that wrong. It will be Lady Blair or if using Baroness, Baroness Blair of……
That’ll teach me post after an afternoon’s liquid ‘working’ lunching.
Accept my apologies cant hunter.
I have bought Lord Liverpool
No, I’m Lord Liverpool – do you even know where it is??
3.8m will be the dole figures soon enough after the election.
what you mean after the election, the massaged numbers are already above that mate. lots of strange deletions and non acceptances on official unemployment registers
Indeed. Comfortably over 5m I estimate. The Labour party is desperate to massage the headline figure to keep it below 3m so that their swipe at the Tories’ ’3m unemployed’ doesn’t sound so risible.
I think they will also regret the other set phrase they trot out on a regular basis of ’15% interest rates under the Tories’. We’ll be there soon when we start to default on the national deficit and the pound plummets.
I meant ‘national debt’ not ‘national deficit’
I know Tories aren’t very good at Maths, but 5.8 million is not “almost double” 3.8 million. It’s almost double 3 million, but not almost double 3.8 million.
I think the Tories need a little bit more edumacation and a little less ignorance and rhetoric.
You are excellent at maths ofcourse, twice now you have managed to bankrupt this nation. I dont think any one needs lectures from c u n t s like you about adding up.
You are excellent at maths ofcourse.
Twice now you have managed to bankrupt this nation.
I dont think any one needs lectures from c o n t s like you about adding up.
fuck off you tedious little fucktard…
“Aren’t very good at Math[']s”?! What? And Labour is historically good at Mathematics and budget deficits?
Labour had fked about with the employment figures, but only succeeding in duping fkwits and ‘party members’ with their bullshit!.. Everybody else (with a brain between their ears) knows that they’re being lied to.
So if Guido is a tory, why does he slate them when they get up to no good.
What’s the matter, can’t your diseased little brain understand that it’s possible to hate Labour but not be a Tory? Not everything in life is that simple, now fuck off you ignorant little butt monkey.
Clearly, some people are more “simple” than others – take your posting’s punctuation (or lack thereof), for example. (I’m guessing that you’re either under the age of 21, or some 50-year-old, uneducated no-hoper.)
He/she with no name – why are you accusing me of being a paid-up Tory?
Anybody who’s been around for more than 5 minutes would know that Guido has a healthy contempt for all of our Political Classes. (Clue’s in the name, really. November the 5th, GunPowder Plot, and all that, Grade-A-Fkingidiot!)
Furthermore, I was addressing ‘Matt’ – and if you aren’t a rabid socialist, you’re doing a very good impression of one. (But, then again, if you are to post under such a weak moniker, then you must expect ‘cross lines’ from time to time.)
TWAT!
You’re beneath contempt
Don’t forget the 54% of teenage pregnancies.
Sure it wasn’t 38 million viewers? You know what you Tories are like when it comes to numbers, figures, adding up, writing, reading, making sense of logical social problems.
Double check Guido. That means twice.
Oh and 2+2=…… any Tories fill in please. Don’t forget, fingers not allowed.
“The Tories seem to think that half our teenagers are pregnant, our cities are like The Wire and that people will get married for a few extra quid.
If they really believe Britain is like this, it’s remarkable that Conservative MPs can pluck up the courage to leave their houses.
They should lower their drawbridges, spend less time tending their moats and duck houses, and join the rest of us in the real world.”
Bizarrely enough, none of the ‘heavyweight’ Tory blogs: ConservativeHome, Iain Dale or Guido Fawkes, bothered to say anything about the massive blunder.
A good point, well made. What’s wrong with teenage pregnancy, anyway? Girls should have their babies while they’re still young and fit. Wait till your past 30 and everything becomes less elastic. while the chance of birth defects increases.
That’s why I support the consistent policies of Blunkett, Morris, Clarke, Kelly, Johnson and Balls of making our teenage lasses stupider and more dependant. Without that, ugly, aphasic teenage boys wouldn’t get a sh*g and the species would start to die out.
Sorry , “you’re”
I can’t see wyewe haven’t got 54% pregnancies Half the population are women and lets face it Labour has fucked everyone in the country
I just wish it was 54% of teenage girls getting pregnant instead of 5.4%, the Tory MP’s would all have cardiac arrest situation. Shock and awe social pregnancies. Just think about all those benefits.
Sure it wasn’t 38 million watching Gordo last night Guido? Look how similar your names are, twins maybe?
@Englishman
lol
He should cry, he has devastated many families lives, who have lost their sons,husbands and fathers that he and bliar sent to their deaths in concocted wars.
Not only that he sent them to their deaths without proper equipment by cutting their budgets.
Do you cry for their losses you arrogant arse-hole?
Well said; my sentiments exactly
To be fair though if you don’t want some nutter in the hills of Afghanistan cutting your ball off don’t join the army.
It’s not all suba diving and kicking the locals about in Lanzarote.
fuck off u fat c o n t
Depends -when you joined neofascist Blair may not have been in power and eager to send you to fight in any shithole BUsh pointed out ,nor was McFuckwit doing the sums to give you a properly costed set of kit
+1
Who is this Gordon Brown? Is he the life-partner of Andy I’m not gay Murray?
Ooooo, you bitch.
So it’s Katie Price for the next leader of the Labour party? Combining Brown’s leadership ability, Darling’s knowledge of economics, Balls’ interest in education and Miliband I’s flair with foreign languages, she would be a great ornament to the Party of the Workers. Above all, she has Blair’s grasp of publicity, which after all is what matters in politics.
Katie Price would be a great shoe-in, but Brown’s ahead of her in one respect.
She’s trying to fuck everyone in Britain, whereas Brown has fucked everyone in Britain.
Haha, brilliant!!!
There’s not enough tears that Brown can shed to wash away the “sins” he’s been responsible for the past 13 years. He could crawl on his knees over broken glass begging for my vote and he still wouldn’t get it
He wouldn’t get far, with me urging him on from behind….
He only got about half that of Jordan’s. He is therefore equal to one ginormous tit.
God, being at the bottom of the food chain for that depressing roll call of humanity, speaks vollumes about the Dear Leader. And interviewed by a man who was fired for either being terminally stupid, or an utter c.unt. Good to see labour maintaining their habitual standards – in the gutter where they belong.
My new manifesto commitment
‘We will Islamise Britain, we will enforce Sharia law’
Ok with us.
Fantastic idea, let’s get started!
Hey, that was our idea.
crackle
Sharia law bring it on.
MPs note hands chopped off for stealing. no homosexuality, no watching porn. no women in any jobs of authority.
Bring it on Snotty.
I am a complete and utter twat and I thoroughly enjoy molesting chickens.
1. Why is one of the bars red when the others are blue?
2. How can anyone count the viewers of a TV programme?
Jesus, and I thought I was retarded.
That’s my hobby!
http://www.ukcolumn.org/2010/02/12/robert-green-in-grampian-police-custody/
This is outrageous and could only happen with David Cameron as leader of the Oppostion
“LATEST ON ROBERT …
It appears they are seeing him “in camera” (unexpectedly!) and he has no legal representation – such is the power of Sheriff Buchanan and his cronies at Aberdeen Sheriff Court … and the fear of the local Aberdeen solicitors.
There is a larger police presence than usual outside the court in Stonehaven, as they were apparently anticipating trouble.
Will keep Robert’s family and close friends up to date as much as I can …
Tom
07791-226-490
PS. Just heard they are giving Robert’s case a “D Notice” status … what a piece of OTT nonsense! ”
For a “breach of the peace” charge at common law for wanting to distribute leaflets no less.!!!
This is the extent that the Scottish authorities appear to be going to to allegedly to keep a massive ped-o-phile ring in business.
This needs FAR MORE coverage.
All in all reading through the above link quite nicely sums up the state of the current UK Police state under NL.
Never met him but best of luck to Robert (I somehow feel he will need it) and I hope all all the bastards that have lined up against him rot in hell (very slowly).
He is being shafted for trying to get justice for a little girl who was serially abused by up to 20 people. Many of whom have senior positions in the Scottish Establishment.
This must NOT be allowed to stand.
http://www.radio4all.net/index.php/program/39831
http://scottishlaw.blogspot.com/2010/02/justice-secretary-linked-to-lord.html
Police Officer Terry Major and Sheriff Graeme Buchanen.
theres a quicker way
I’d be happy to contribute to the ‘buy a bullet’ collection.
This is fucking scary.
D Noticed though, I sincerely hope some editor in the MSM is willing to stand up and defy it. I’m thinking of the red tops, y’know those known for regularly whipping up slack jawed mobs against paediatricians.
Oh, maybe not.
Called Grampian Police. Put on hold for a bit but then told they cannot confirm who they have in custody. Please, anyone interested, make a quick call to the Grampian Police switchboard and ask about the welfare & status of Robert Green, arrested in Aberdeen. You’ll get knowhere but they have to understand their D Notice is worth fuck all and people are aware. The more the merrier. Please be POLITE and friendly though or you may get a visit by your local plod.
Number is 08456005700
Latest call to switchboard.
Asked to speak to someone in the Chief Constables office. Asked for name & address, I gave a name but refused to give an address. Put on hold then told,” it is Grampian Police policy not to discuss the Robert Green case, you will just have to wait for news on that I’m afraid”.
Do please ring. You lot are all for chomping at the bit on this safe forum, do something that actually matters
Grampian Police switchboard no. – 08456005700 – ask after the welfare of Robert Green (arrested in Aberdeen for Breach of the Peace) or if adventurous, ask to speak to the Chief Cons office about Robert Green. Do NOT give them your address. Be polite though.
Thanks.
Not for the first time I ask myself JUST WHAT IS WRONG WITH THE SCOTS???????
Has anyone emailed Cameron about this to demand he raises the arrest of Robert Green at PMQs on Wednesday?
Reminds me of those horror stories were the evil Lord kidnaps children and takes them to his castle,but they always finish with a torch bearing mob attacking .
After another call. Asked name and address. Refused both. The poor switchboard operator said “this matter is now subjudice” (though she couldn’t pronounce subjudice; bless
Please people, make some calls, only 30 secs of your time!
08456005700
I hear McMong enjoys a good probing. Wow he got beaten by Dannii Minogue. Am I the only one who thinks the sainted Sarah is in fact a bit of a nut job herself? All those tears, I think she’s the one who drives the mong on, no woman in her right mind would want to live with a vile pig like Mongy.
i would never involve my family in politics and only married sarah to quieten the rumours of my love for u.s rent boys.
gordon would be unpopular in a sewage farm!
oh I know just what you mean Ducky!
Superb piece Fawkes
Morally repugnant donors, using his wife n kids as props, and the use of bullying and smearing to attain and hold his place at the height of politics.
This maladroit, lying, hate filled, inept, brooding, spendaholic, sulking, mentally unstable Scotch wretch is an embarrassment to England all hard working, law abiding English people.
This viceroy of the Scotch Raj in London will spend anything, say anything to keep his mental breakdown at bay by keeping the reins of power.
I predict if he is rejected by what’s left of the thinking English electorate, he will go fucking beserk, kill everyone in Downing Street, and be found months later living in a den inside Harrogate municipal tip, wearing bin bags and animal furs.
And I am unanimous in that.
Let’s hope he runs riot with a gun before the removal men arrive
Boris Becker for PM
I was one of the unfortunate’s who watched the Tears for Piers show and unfortunately for Brown, it did not change my view of him one jot!
In fact, once I had stopped vomiting, my view of him was decidedly more jaundiced than ever.
Serves you right ELF. What else did you expect from someone who could use their dead child of 8 years ago to seek electoral advantage?
How bad does it have to get before this spiteful and mendacious bully-boy is finally sent packing?
I watched it. Morgan was appalling and obsequious , the interview was dull, Brown was best when talking about his love of his family and his work ethic. The whole thing was stage managed and seemed scripted. Brown tried to come across as honest but he undermined it by telling, at best, partially-true anecdotes about gifts from the Middle East, messy rooms and meeting his wife.
We’ve been rumbled !!
Why didn’t he mention that Sarah’s being shafted by a junior treasury minister because she can’t get a decent shagging at home? Wonder if that was in the original script……
Damn I missed Boris Becker!
Look everyone, admit it Gordo proves that Britain’s Got Talent!
A latent raw leadership talent, packaged up with an X-Factor personality that rivals Sharon Osbourne (give or take a few million). Look out Obama! Our great white hope is here!
Tears! They weren’t tears of sadness, that was the grim determination of our beached white whale PM humping the beach to see if he can get back into the water without the need of Greenpeace and a crane.
Survive an evening with Piers and a load sand in your foreskin…
Just the determination you need of bring us out of the Pan-global-nothing-to-do-with-me-as-chancellor-universally-missed-don’t-say-rescession-”down-turn”.
Get the chips and brown sauce. White whale take-out for all!
Sky News:
10,000 american troops enter jordan
Slag
They will not get out easy, she needs a re-tread Labia shot to pieces & her Vulva has seen better days, needs a Datsun
But what about the Huge Roast Pig?
Did someone call?
Dear Ms Smith,
Apart from being a useless tub of lard with a husband of dubious morality the question must be asked:
Were you a gift to the Prime Minister from a middle-Eastern government?
Ugly, useless tub of lard, please!
The MSM doesn’t seem interested in following up on that particular curiosity.
You would at least expect them to try and find out which Middle East state would send a huge roast pig to a foreign Prime Mentalist wouldn’t you?
Question anything our great leader says? That’s just crazy talk.
Guido, this Martin Day fellow (?) is probably the son of TAT. Suggest another 24 hrs and if he doesn’t improve dump him. He’ll ruin your stats
Tat wasn’t a Labour supporter.
Gordon should get a vasectomy. No more tears.
I’d give him one with a chainsaw.
Jesus does this make me feel shitty.
Can I help ease that out?
The only similarity between the Prime Mentalist and Boris Becker is that one of them fucked a model in a broom cupboard while the other fucked a model economy into a broom cupboard.
I simply adore the way Brown accepts electoral help from a man who conspired to get British troops killed in Iraq with his ridiculous front page fraud.
Exactly what is Brown’s level of Ku_uuuuntishness?
Utter?
Complete?
Total?
All of the above?
Cameron didnt say his kids and wife weren’t props you fucking mincing leftie cow’s gash
“almost double”
For heaven’s sake, you’d think with all Ashcroft’s millions you people would at least be able to club together and buy a calculator. Can no-one in your party count?
Lord Paul could loan them one of his pension fund accountants
I’m rather afraid that up to 50% of those viewing won’t even know he’s the PM of their country.
Of the 50% that did 40% will be died in the wool Tories – so that leaves 60% of the 1.9m – say 1.15m. Let’s be generous and say 35% of them will be Labour voters and 20% are committed Lib Dems (if there is such a thing – non-sequitur? You said it brother), that leaves us with 500,000 Others and Swingers.
OK maximum turnout is going to be 65% so we’re down to 330,000 possibles who may or may not have been swung.
Again, let’s be generous and say only 50% of those didn’t vomit or see through a complete Campbell of a set up.
That’s 150,000 possible swingers of which, 20,000 will be UKIP, 15,000 will be BNP, 15,000 SNP and 5,000 will be Plaid Cyrmru (possibly less as many Welshmen will still have been drunk after the Cardiff Arms Park party).
So now we’re looking at 95,000 possible swingers. OK. Let’s take off 15,000 political anoraks – they’ve got nothing to do with this. Subtract also the 20,000 old people in homes who couldn’t turn off the telly even if they wanted to.
Down to 60,000. Take off 30,000 for those who began to watch it and suddenly remembered that it was Valentine’s night and the Mrs went upstairs an hour ago.
30,000.
Take off 10,000 for those who leave the telly on whilst they go and do something more interesting in the garage/put out the recycling/get disturbed by a phonecall.
20,000.
Take off 3,000 prisoners.
17,000.
So we’ve got 17,000 potential swingers. Let’s be charitable and say 50% of those have a brain.
Leaving us 8,500 who were won over by the quivering lip.
Divided by 650 = 13 voters per seat.
Which, given the size of the swing currently being reported in the marginals leads me to conclude that it was all a magnificent waste of fucking air-time.
Nice one Al!
Clusterfuck.
that leaves us with 500,000 Others and Swingers.
…. thats moral decline for you
Nice statistics – but you ignore/downplay those non Tory voters who vehemently want to overturn/fragment the status quo.
NO-ONE I know is preparing to vote for the three main parties – & I’ve worked in the City/Canary Wharf for very nearly 20 years. In fact it’s almost frightening how much antipathy almost everyone I know holds for the main parties.
Ignore those Wharf denizens who are going to drift off to Geneva. There’s genuine ANGER in at least some of the rest. And not everyone’s going to play by the rules…
For nearly 4 Million people to willingly tune into a Party Political Podcast of live boil-lancing by the Gorgon must prove that Bugs really do exist, and that their preferred entertainment really is sewer-combing and opening surgical waste bags.
If I ever wished to lose weight by bulemic self-abuse I ought to DVD the gut-churning cauldron of Gorgon’s mucous, mixed with spent tampons so I could watch it every time I’d treated myself to a BigMac too many.
It was atcually over 4 Million. Average of 4.2 million and a peak of 5.2 million. Guido (or anyone else) still hasn’t given an explanation of where these figues come from….
Well, I sent an order out from the Bunker last Friday that ALL public sector workers HAD to watch the Piss Organ Comedy so I can confidently claim that there were more than 5 million viewers ‘glued’ to it.
I can also confidently claim that all our problems started in America.
Out of a popluation of over 60 million – 4 million viewers is nothing to be proud of. Shows how most of the country hold the monster Brown in utter contempt.
Well they’re wrong so presumably they’re from CCHQ.
FFS. Fancy coming behind Richard Madeley IN ANYTHING.
Not a second time.
He didn’t coem behind Richard Madeley though. It got 4.2 million viewers not the 3.8 million on the chart. Bloody right-wingers mixing up their figures again!
Looks like a zero percent increase to me.
Who gives a shit you pathetic fuck up?
The BARB figures aren’t online for a week; meanwhile the overnights vary between your 4.2 and 3.76 (that I’ve seen). Jordan got 5.2 last outing but 5.74 last March. I am looking forward to confirmation of the “UK Is Out Of Recession” figures once the ONS collates the rest of the data. May be more important.
Didn’t he forget to mention why Cherie and Euan hate his guts?
Ha ha surprise surprise, Gordon. I’m better than youuuu.
Gasps around Twitterville following the tear jerking gut wrenching mutual love fest brokered by newspaper bad boy and reality TV judge Piers Morgan, it’s said they took two hours to record the interview and no doubt the hapless editor had a No10 heavy jogging the edit key.
Just as it was about to get interesting, a commercial break would pop up and in one case they were all in-house ITV programme promos. I would have thought at least the Royal Mail could have bunged a couple in, along with a couple of debt free vulture finance outfits.
Anyone who knows the Edinburgh student scene at the time of Broons vintage will tell you six pints was just the entry ticket and the tipple was a a ‘huf an a huf’; Half pint of Heavy and a whisky 1/2 gill, so Broon was tecnically correct as he would need to drink the six pints (12 hufs!) but neck the 12 1/2 gill whisky tots!
Piers didn’t get onto ‘necking’ in the alcoholic sense anyway. I was also puzzled to learn that he had to buy the wedding ring from America.. Broon is not really very good at anything to do with computers, so how did he go about ordering the goods?
One might be tempted to send the transcript to HM Customs & Revenue, just to ensure the correct amount of value added tax was paid and the goods importation properly declared.
Of course an American gold ring wouldn’t have a UK hallmark and perhaps the gold content value of the ring is below the tax threshold for importation, plated even? But that would be churlish so I’ll leave it to Gerorge Osborne to do it when he slides in the back entrance of HM Treasury and wallpapers the building with a cheeky little number from the family Osborne & Little range beloved by the Notting Hill and Fulham set…
Nice wallpaper, got it in my Lavvie.
I’ve got it in my luvvie.
Daily Mash have nailed it…
BROWN WAITS TO SEE IF BRITAIN IS THAT STUPID
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/politics/politics-headlines/brown-waits-to-see-if-britain-is-that-stupid-201002152471/
“Margaret Gerving, a retired headmistress from Guildford, added: “I thought it was a fascinating insight into what makes Gordon Brown tick, though I did keep waiting for the fat-faced prick to ask him why he decided to fuck Britain right up the shitter.”"
iF t4P s had the lowest viewing numbers, exclud boris becker, and it seems the majority who watched (made comment are scepticle to say the least re it’s sincerity, it is very bad news for gb and labour, explains millibands renewed leadership attempt. bananas…get your bananas here.
SCIENTISTS DISCOVER NEW ELEMENT
Oxford University researchers have discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (symbol=Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called pillocks. Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete. Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to 6 years. It does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganisation in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.
In fact, Governmentium’s mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganisation will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as a critical morass. When catalysed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium (symbol=Ad), an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium, since it has half as many pillocks but twice as many morons.
Most creative. I enjoyed that
54% of my colleagues want me to lead the Party for 10 years…
Sorry that was 5.4%…
That many? I doubt it.
One thing I haven’t seen commented on yet is Brown saying about Sarah carrying the baby (Jennifer) for 9 months. It may seem a little thing, but Jennifer was 7 weeks premature, so Sarah only carried her for a little over 7 months. You would think that would be seared into Brown’s consciousness after what happened.
What a perverse line to take.
Just part of the political ‘narrative’. Reality need not intrude…
Well done Guys.
You have made Guido proud.
If only he’d matched the viewing figures of David Cameron’s delightful weepathon over here:
http://programmes.stv.tv/the-hour/news-gossip/157172-exclusive-interview-david-cameron-on-the-pain-of-losing-a-child/
You can hardly accuse him of fishing for votes can you FFS?
He was fishing, but in the wrong waters.
Actually, rational analysis would suggest that as the “salient” points had already been all over the media, there was little to be gained by watching it.
Coupled with the fact that most people don’t give a rats ass about politics, it is hardly surprising.
Am no fan of Brown or Labour but not a fan of half completed analysis either.
The ‘salient’ points of soap operas are well publicised, but they still get the highest viewing figures…
As I said, that is not to be taken in isolation.
Many people care more about their soap operas, football teams and other assorted nonsense than politics.
The question to ask is; why?
The answer is simple: They do not feel represented – because they are not.
Not almost double – more like almost half again.
I went out to watch some paint dry as an alternative.
At least Bonkers Brown beat Bonking Boris, so that’s something he’s not last at.
Ah grasshopper.all but first are last
He came in on May 9th 2010. All he has done for the past 25 years is watch that video of himself with Morgan,over and over again,saying why did I listen to those fookers why? What happend to his wife. Oh she fucked off with one of his advisors.
I’m *so* glad I didn’t watch the evil fucker use his dead baby daughter to help get a handful of sympathy votes.
I’d rather eat a bowl of my own ear wax than watch that bastard.
“I won’t use my children/family for political reasons”
yeah, right, you fucking evil piece of shit.
I hope when he’s abandoned by the labour party in the very near future he finds himself alone, wondering if all the lies and desecration of his dead child’s memory was worth it for a handful of votes.
I hope he spends every waking moment of his miserable existence realising just how low he sunk to use a dead child for political gain.
£25million pledged by Gordon Brown for Ulster-Scots (made-up) and Irish (dead) languages to appease Sinn Fein and DUP.
Nice of him to throw away yet more money the country doesnt have, isnt it?
Isn’t NI even more loss-making than Scotland? (If it were a business, it would have been closed down long ago.)
Hoots mon a cribbins ids spake well in Balleemeana
It’s no wonder Jordan was more popular. Brown is just A tit.
Sarah best watch her step imagine how many votes a dead wife would get if she has an accident between now and May 9th remember you heard it here 1st
Do try not to get caught up in statistical manipulation, Guido. Based on the graph you gave, I really don’t see how 5.8 is “almost twice” 3.8.
I watched a tiny bit of the show, but Gordon’s gurning grin was very off putting. When Piers Morgan described him as “delectable” (some misguided lady had apparently said that) I just couldn’t take any more. Delectable! Eeeeuuuggghhhh!
Awful sycophantic interview.
The most pathetic bit is all the Laboids going on twitter to praise the great and glorious leader they tried to get rid of a few weeks ago. They are pathetic.
History repeats itself!
http://theknifeandme.wordpress.com/2010/02/15/not-tonight-sarah/
Lizard watch. All I could see was negatvity and spatial confusion. Energy sucker.
The fact that even Richard Madeley got more viewers tells you all you need to know about the popularity of the one eyed phone-chucking snotgobbler.
His fat wife gets more viewers that that when she dances about in front of the window (like in ‘Tales of the Unexpected’).
“shows just how far he is willing to demean the status of his office for a couple of thousand swing votes”
I’d take issue with that, Guido. Most of the viewers will have either been Labour party members (who give a fuck), or Tory party members (who wanted to see him fuck up. Again). Like programmes such as Newsnight, very few viewers will be undecided voters.
Fractionally its nowhere near double, but the main point according to the graph is that the absolute number appears lower than all but boris becker – although perhaps Brown’s episode had a stronger media profile in the week preceding the broadcast.
I’d have preferred to see him ‘reduced to tears’ by high voltage electrodes attached to his private parts.
I’d have preferred to see him reduced slowly over a simmering heat after being cut into mince, and then being fed to a pit bull.
Almost double watched Jordan? Maths is not what it used to be. BTW I didn’t watch , doesn’t matter who is on, the interviewer is too much of a Huhne.
All I can say is ‘bad Seed’ falls on stony ground.
Out of two children One dies the other is disabled, what else is there to say, although I am sorry for the child..
Mind you you looked at Mrs Obama, elegant beautifully turned out, then Sarah Brown looking like a Bloke in Drag. Is she a bloke in drag and who wears the trousers in their family? I bet they have a monthly account with a dildo manufacturer. How will that be hidden in monthly expenses?
With the EU treaty he signed us up to, the ‘Fourth Reich’ comes into being.
Golgotha
Katie Price got the largest figures because she is a useful humn being and reknowned for her work such as erm hmm