Huhne: You’d Need a Heart of Stone Not to Laugh | James Delingpole
Huhne Would Have to Walk | Nick Robinson
SWP Not Opposing King Ken | ConservativeHome
Huhne Won’t Know Until AM Either | Kier Simmons
Totty Cover Up | Mark Wallace
Lord Hamas | Harry’s Place
BBC Doing Putin’s Dirty Work | Peter Oborne
No. 10′s Pessimism | ConservativeHome
Maddie Tory Back | Mail
Civil Service Tax Loophole? | David Hencke
Brothers at Arms | Will Heaven
Careful Guru | Paul Waugh
Labour’s Confusion Won’t Get Them Anywhere | Telegraph
Ed Beats Dave, Dave Beats Bercow | The Commentator
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One scrounger tries to justify their benefits to the BBC:
‘We get the Sky Movies package because we’re stuck in the house all week – otherwise we wouldn’t have any entertainment.’
I don’t need no doctor says:
Ken Livingstone is just an older version of Ed Miliband.
More like gone bananas
Welsh questions – what a ratings winner!
@adamboulton Guido Fawkes still having a shit and missing PMQs
He certainly is going bananas… to lose weight he goes from eating 920 kcals (4 x 230) to 945 kcals (9 x 105)… something does not add up there
It’s a negative growth in calories obviously…
I think he’s ahead of the game – there’s actually been talk of a FAT TAX – much less fat (i.e. none) in Bannanas
A FAT TAX would discriminate heavily (no pun intended) against Labour voters. Scottish kids are bettered only in their lardiness by Italians in Europe.
What would really financially cripple Labour voters is if there was a stupidity tax. They’d be skint.
Guido – I’ve put together some of the best comments from your PMQs Live chat – see the latest comments and highlights here – some corking comments and funnies!
Going to make it a regular feature.
he has never been good at adding up!
Endogenous growth theory
It’s just part of his Fyffe-a-day diet. Soon only have two ape knees to rub together.
I’ll fetch my coat ….
Although slightly reminiscent of 1970′s football matches when Cyril Regis et al first burst onto the scene surely to day would be a golden opportunity for all Tory MPs to show up with bananas and munch them all through PMQ.
I went to his first match with my Dad and Grandad, I was 11 years old and I think he played against Rotherham in the league cup and I remember the bananas from the brain dead, brilliant player Cyril Regis put his heart and sole into that match.
Both soles, surely?
Well spotted William have a pint on me!
My gags today will have Gordon Brown in tears
Rectal tears.
C’mon Dave:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8507645.stm
“Step-Up” and have a go!
Fucking hell, that bird in the short skirt sure is fit. I’d step up to her any day.
I’d step up and leave her covered in a sticky man-glue mess…
She’d be glad she’s wearing those glasses, when I’ve finished with her.
Well done Yeo! Take it the Writ is in the Post? MMM Thought not…
Hain looks like an overripe plantain.
Gordon prefers a nice firm plantain.
the more eyewatering the better.
or a fruit infusion…
I really need this months tractor factory productivety figures and soon.
Guido..Guido..Guido.. You there?.. PMQs, Guido?..
Oh bugger – he’s finally been silenced
Looks like a button was left unpressed before first orders.
Ben Bradshaw could not lie straight in bed !!
I can vouch for that
Down the Fisting Room they don’t call him Stretch Armstrong for nothing.
He’s as bent asa banana.
Fabricant is mad!
I’d be angry if I had to wear a wig like that.
Is there anyone there?
Am I missing something? Live chat not working on my screen.
nor anyone’s…….
Nope. It’s fucked.
Whatever happened to Harman_Pride? And where are her porn shots?
It’s the Giraffe we all really miss.
Live chat not working?
wake up guido
Jonah blessed the server yesterday
McMong spouting crap already
why is this not working? anyone else having trouble with the cover it live?
Yep – seems knackered
jockey
C’mon, another 50p in the meter Guido.
Fabricant looks like he has been thrown together.
Not working!!!
sit down Dave
Carlos – what’s for lunch? Crabs?
Will Cameron ask about Hatties cute fat smelly arse being rear of the year?
“bedder way”
It’s stuffed.
Got nuffink here Guido!
Should arrange it for GMT rather than WET
Bagpuss is BACK
But the BBC never picked this up when Mong announced this care thing the other day, just like Mong’s Caner care plan. Why does the BBC give him a free ride?
TRACTOR STATISTICS
It says 11:45 WET, which only applies to Spain and Portugal…!
Fuck off you fat ugly jock
Broon taking piss
Brown is a total anus
Yay Bananas!!!!!!!!!!
Brown’s gone mad
He’s been bonkers for years, ever since he had his relationship with Peter
Ask about immigration Dave, go on go on go on
Just for the record, Nick Brown is an ugly fat twat. Good day.
Well, as the live coverage isn’t working, I shall ask here instead;
What shall I have for lunch?
Bananas
Fuck of BErkovski
Bercowitz
brown cannot speak properly
You’d think he would have learned to speak with his mouth full by now, wouldn’t you?
Working now!
Has Broon had a make-over? Should get his money back.
Has Cameron asked about Labour’s immigration scandal yet?
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1249797/Labour-threw-open-doors-mass-migration-secret-plot-make-multicultural-UK.html
If the Tories don’t run with this then I know a party who will.
A huge scandal and one you can be sure the BBC will do everything they can to stop gaining momentum.
It is far worse than Brown selling our gold or even Heath forcing the European Communities Act through- this one can never be changed, will lead to more poverty and racialism, makes a peaceful parliamentary nation harder to exist (why would a Somalian accept the authority of a British magistrate for example?) and it was done for purely party political gain.
Worst bit – we haven’t seen it yet; they’ll have far more children and the problems will become multiplied – especially lowered real-term wages for the poor. Not the fault of individual immigrants but of Labour. Give it a century and this country will be totally unrecognisable and, I fear, with it will go habeas corpus, jury trial, freedom of speech (assuming Labour doesn’t formally abolish them all sooner anyway of course)
What do you mean “give it a century”, sometimes looking out of my window it’s like watching a delegation from the United Nations passing by.
Well I feel like a spot on a domino
Give that man a banana.
“Give it a century and this country will be totally unrecognisable …”
Why the long wait? I see it every time I step outside my front door. Following todays ruling on cremation it won’t be long before we see burning bodies drifting down the Thames.But hey… we’re all being enriched so suck it up.
Be like me have 15 kids
If you dial 999 in Bradford you dont get the police you get the Bengal Lancers
Given the Desai / Ghaffur BPA domination of the Police, I’d prefer the Bengal Lancers
Please ensure from now on that your comments do not break my new equality guidelines.
No smut. No innuendo. No sexist comments. Represent the feminist perspective. No objectionable viewpoints! No nastiness!
From now on we want the blogosphere to be fair.
Yes, I know. Freedom of speech is all well and good, but it does not mean you have the right to shout, “I am covered in semen” during PMQs.
I hope that this is clear.
sorry guys, I don’t have the will to go on listening to this pantomime. Brown is nothing short of a delusional bully and how I wish someone would just go over and punch the fucker – why don’t they all just walk out of this charade……???
Cameron is beginning to realise just how difficult it is to deal with a sociopath.
As far as a narcissistic megalomaniac like Brown is concerned, he’s always right and everyone else is wrong unless they agree with him.
Brown came over appallingly on the TV. He appears to be disintegrating live on air.
I suggest this move some weeks ago, if they all got up and walked out, he never answers a question, browms blood pressure would explode!
I WANT TO LOSE THE GENERAL ELECTION
MAKE NO MISTAKE ABOUT THAT
I’M DOING VERY WELL SO FAR
C U N T
PMQs today is a sad reflection on our political system.
W*nkers on all sides.
Cameron tried to be serious and professional but when you’re up against a deranged lying psychopath like Brown then it’s bound to end up in a shouting match with Brown doing most of the shouting.
Did Brown lose? Again? He’s such a loser.
Loser Brown we’ll have to call him.
Brown lost by a mile but in his own deranged, diseased brain he won.
Hooray for Gordon, Saviour of the World!!!!!!
I’d say Brown just edged it.
Deluded!
Bollocks
Our glorious leader smashed that Toff again!
Thought Kruschev was dead
Andrew Sparrow in the Guardians says Brown won by being statemenlike,and Cameron could not answer the question on care home.ffs thought if was Brown to answer question not Cameron.
what a fucking dick head.
Same old bollocks from Brown -policy policy, policy, blah blah blah and no f*cking money, money money. DISGRACE
Toenails Robinson said Brown was on sparkling form brushing aside Cameron’s questions with disdain.
Who needs to watch the film 1984 on TV last night when you can see propoganda live on the BBC each and everyday!
if you want to piss the BBC off post their primetime shit on youtube. I do it every day and it’s not long befor youtube pull it as they spot it.I think there must be a full time crew at the beeb watching youtube now. ha ha ha ha ha
Daily Politics attacking Cameron and bigging up Brown. Studio guests are Shirley Williams and Ben Bradshaw (no Tory again)
The BBC’s pro-Labour bias is brazen and shameless.
Shameless it is, HOW can this be allowed to continue, can’t answer why no tory rep, but the bias is not sustainable.
There have been several shows on BBC radio that have had labour and liberal, or just labour guests. All joining in with the “let’s kick the tories” soiree.
They are getting as much labour bias in as they can before the election is officially called whereupon a legal obligation to even coverage for the top three parliamentary parties then applies.
As I predicted some time ago. Labour would unashamedly use the BBC and their own departmental advertising budgets in lieu of an election campaign, because of their perilous finances and only call the election itself at the last moment to give themselves the shortest official campaign possible.
It’s easy to brush aside questions with disdain when you have no intention of answering them or choose to answer an entirely different question.
As you sew so shall you reap Labour scum.
If the IMF are that funny bring it on
My fervent wish is that the next Speaker holds every minister from EVERY party to addressing the questions that he’s asked.
The current and the last one’s are/were pathetic in that regard.
I’d far prefer to see Dave (or whoever the next PM is) actually answering hard questions. At least the public might respect them more for it…
MILLEPEDE STATEMENT
Who is the big fat bloke top left behind MPede ?
The one with the cardigan and security pass ?
It’s Levi Strauss, Miliband’s handler.
Daily Politics – Not the most balanced panel, wouldn’t you say? Pathetic.
It’s another Labour Party broadcast like most news and politics shows on the BBC these days.
Cameron, please take note and sort out these shills as soon as you win the election.
Neil’s supposed neutrality is carefully nurtured, does his best to dumb down all politics, with his ever more ridiculous hair-piece,
O/T Guido but curse of Jonah strikes again with Kraft ditching Cadbury’s workers…..
“Give me the tools and I’ll finish the job”. Give me a gun and I’ll finish the fecker. (I know where he lives)
And have you been to Downing St recently?
The security surrounding the evil monster is staggering.
All to protect him from all of us.
On that theme,can anyone state with any truth that Brown has actually gone amongst the public at any time in the past 2 years – not the contrived,controlled and cleansed visits he makes (and then dooms) to factories/schools etc.
All that security just affirms his fantasy as man-of-destiny, father-of-the-nation, the-next-Churchill.
He’s going to get such a fucking land when he wakes up some day in June and it dawns on him that he and all his works and all his policies and his entire government have been given a P45.
The evil, incompetent, economy-wrecking bastard.
This idea of him having a ‘moment of clarity’ as the gates to Downing Street close behind him a final time is comforting, but born of dramatic cliché. More likely, he will be stubbornly convinced of the rectitude of his every action until he draws his final breath.
That he should not, is to wish unendurable horror upon him.
The gate of downing street will not be closed behind him, he will be dragged out of the back door and taken out via a different route as Cameron walks past a small crowd of well-wishers and tory party faithful into Downing Street and Number 10′s front door.
Brown will not congratulate Cameron, and will not accept that he lost the election. There will be no contrition whatsoever from the C’UNT at all.
OK, I can happily go along with wishing ‘unendurable horror upon him’. After what he’s done to the country I’d also happily add the CIA torture fests that Milliband assures us are nothing to do with him. Hear he’s claiming he’s ‘exonerated’ – yeah – like Hitler is ‘exonerated’ about the holocaust.
He dare not! If I saw him out in public, I would poke him in his one good eye!
Could you give him bunch of fyffes?
maybe we should all go to downing st
and throw bananas through the railings
And get arrested for terrorism offences?
After you!
Put each banana in a size12 climbing boot first. Better still use a pair of boots to make sure.
Downing Street? You’d not make much of a killer laddie
I rather enjoy my U-TURNS on policy
A vote for the Conservatives is a wasted vote
C UN T
That me, a fucking novice
Unlike me who has a Phd on the history of the Scottish unioins.
Yeah but it took you what – ten years to finish it ?
And even then it was shite
They only gave it to you to get rid of you – delusion , delusion, delusion.
Given your wonderfully immediate grasp of international affairs you’ve just got time to apply to be King of Siam :~) Go on then, Phuk off.
Harlot looking lovely but she also looked as if Millipede Sr was boring the tits off her like he does us. I wondered what Harlot’s slippage was!
Shot off quickly too, once she had given her lukewarm support. Probably a cystitis call!
The duo balls do get a little wet after prolonged periods,so to speak.
And even the tennis ball size tends to slip down the sides of the thong from slack Harlot’s fonte!
She is a he and they are her bollacks from a double hernia
That would explain the dugs nearing what is left of her waistline!
(Fente I meant to write, not ‘fonte’.)
Claims that we intend introducing a £20,000 Death Tax are all Tory lies – it wil be nearer £45,000. All these people dying before the age of 100 will mean that they are unavailable to pay taxes to keep Tracey, her 12 children and their 12 fathers in Playstation, XBox, 42” plasmas TVs, fags and booze. It is the right thing to do.
What an odd looking person he is too – is he gay? Nothing wrong in being so – just cannot work out where he hangs.
Is that why he used to boast about his 7″? Most gays would probably consider that a toothpick though!
Dunno but he deffo looks like a gayboy – it’s the eye makeup that gives him away I think.
Labour = Tomb Raiders. And not the sexy Angelina Jolie types.
More your Burke and Hare types. Witholding treatment through NICE so they can get their hands on your cash that much sooner.
Labour = Grave robbers.
With the going rate at £20k a head does this mean the Armed forces owe
the treasury £5,120,000 for all the deaths of our gallant heroes or would the
individual bereaved families have to cough up ?
Why the fuck won’t Bercow the little prick MAKE McDoom answer a fucking question?
Bercow, ffs, sort this out.
Bercow allowed a question on what the PM’s opinion was re the situation in Sri Lanka but admonished somebody who asked him what his opinion was about the French buying Dover Port on the grounds it was nothing to do with the PM.
So – Dover nothing to do with the PM, Sri Lanka very much to do with the PM.
Thank you Bercow. Enjoy the next few weeks. You might want to get the traditional outfit on expenses. You’ll regret it in later years, or, more accurately later weeks (after June) that you didn’t take the chance when you could.
Nigel will be the Victor
I do hope so !
Ditto.
you really should pay attention…..bercow intervened because the tool of a labour mp whittered on about the ‘tory carpetbagger’….questions are meant to be about goverment business/policy not an attack on tory PPCs…..you will note that bercow feels able to mention this when it is a backbencher, not however when tractor stats and lies about the tories come out of the glorious leader’s own orifice.
“traditional outfit on expenses.” ?
Would that be a traditional GIMP SUIT ?
with or without the slot for the mouth ?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Zentai_BDSM.jpg
Definitely needs the mouth slot version – for sucking on the public tit & for giving blow jobs where appropriate (appropriate to brownosing for his ‘career’ I mean)..
Who will mediate in the televised debates and ensure that “Incapability” debates the questions actually asked instead of his normal trick of quoting Tractor production stats. Will they employ Sqeaker Bercow , or maybe Nick ( I’m impartial) Robinson to ensure fair play??
That will not happen. The terms of these debates has been set so tight that we will only get three party political broadcasts from each of these things.
They are an utter waste of time and money. None of the top three parliamentary parties dare face the real public. They are all scammers ripping off the public and the mainstream media are complicit in this corruption.
If you are going to introduce a Death Tax, I’m off to Switzerland.
Question;
Is this a report on the terrorist suspect in US custody or does it refer to Gordon Brown,another terrorist who should also be in custody?
“It was clear not only from the reports of the content of the interviews but also from the report that he was being kept under self-harm observation, that the inter views were having a marked effect upon him and causing him significant mental stress and suffering.”
PMQ’s is a joke.
Where’s te punchline?
Lordy shit fuck. Now Brown wants to charge people £20,000 to die?
I think he should go further and introduce a sliding scale of tariffs. He should make you pay a non-refundable £10,000 deposit if you are diagnosed with a terminal illness, £5,000 if you suffer from a life-shortening condition and £2,000 if you contract MRSA while staying in one of his shiny, new Foundation hospitals.
I sat through PMQs for the first time in months and I am actually physically repelled by Brown. What terrible, unspeakable crime have we committed to deserve this appalling mong in Number Ten?
Clarence, you are so right. I always turn away when the Mong is on t.v., less I grab something and smash the set.
Hmmm. Charging people a flat tax of 20K for dying does seem a little perverse. He’s rather thrown away any moral high ground he might have had with his ‘IHT cuts for the richest 3,000′ hasn’t he?
Compulsory death tax for everybody rather trumps that in electoral suicide terms. Tell you what Brown. Fuck off.
For all the Labour Loving Mongs who said that I couldn’t take it me, I would like them to witness me and the £20k being cremated.
And if you aint got £20k spare?…
Zombies everywhere!
The bill is passed on to your next of kin, in lieu of inheritance tax.
I intend to blow/give away every penny before I go, without any record of where/when/who it went to. As my next of kin don’t live in the UK, Gordon Brown & his gimps can fuckedty fuck right off. Try & collect that you c*nt!
I am going to blow the lot pissed up,stoned out my skull and die fucking happy knowing I cheated the bastards of it.
I have no idea.
The polls shouldn’t even be close. But because ‘Dave’ is such a weak and uninspiring man, and millions are in the keep of the state, there’s a chance Brown will be with us for another 5 years.
I truly despair at the idiocy of the British people.
You are right that the polls should not be close, but the fact is, millions of people will NOT vote for a continuation of the high-tax, PC, Green, liberal bollocks that labour represents and Cameron promises to keep. Why the fuck should they?
Cameron is NOT offering any alternative, so many people have rightly decided that he does not deserve their vote.
Now I agree that the British public needs to wake up, for so long as they are allowed to remain British. They need to become aware that if they are sick of both labour and the tories, then they need to get out and vote, because they outnumber labour and tory supporters combined!
My mother always maintained that once we reach a certain age, we would all be called in for a whiff of something to sort out pension, benefits and trade deficits.
Looks like Logan’s Run was only out by about £20k.
Having said that I get the satisfaction of watching Brown et al go first – because it’s the right thing to do!
I think the message from Soylent Green would be worse…
Care for some more Soylent Brown, vicar?
let me get this right
years ago we paid NI and for our pension
then Gordon robbed our pensions
now we don’t have any money to cover the things NI used to cover or have any pensions worth having to pay for the things we might need including support
it is expected now that we pay again for the support WTF
Plus VAT
That c/unt Brown always makes the phoney complaint that Cameron never asks about policy. And when he does, he doesn’t answer and just shouts pre-prepared bollocks like “This is no time for a novice.” I swear this country is in the hands of a complete fucking sociopath. Bad enough he’s an autistic asexual bullying c/unt in a sham marriage crying crocodile tears over a child he never gave a flying fuck about. But he’s also an ill-tempered misogynist and habitual liar and corrupt crook. The election can’t come quick enough. That’s if this c/unt doesn’t go completely mental and tells his aides to find a way to bottle this election too!!!!!
When Brown slabbers about policy, Dave should snap back and ask him to call an election so he can argue about policy all he wants for 6 weeks – if he hasn’t the courage to do so, then he should just answer the f**king question.
So I’ll put you down as a possible ‘yes’ then ?
“Sarah, go get me my banana you woman! I hate women! What am I paying you for? You’re not my wife, you female specimen! I hate women! You’re just here to make me look like a regular family man! Go get my banana, female! Aren’t we paying you enough to be my beard?!! Hop to it before I punch you and throw you out of your chair like I did that other female, my fucking woman secretary! I can’t stand women! What are women! Aaaaagh, I’m completely fucking mental!!! Where’s my rocking horse? I need to ride it in my pampers! Hurry, female!!!”
God, PMQs is like listening to a stuck record. Brown as usual lacking the creative skills to say anything remotely interesting and Cameron being unable to exploit Brown’s weaknesses. Zzz
If that nasty Mr Cameron makes Gornon cry again, I will vote for Labour – after Eastenders.
WHAT IS IMPORTANT IS, IS WHAT IS IMPORTANT IS.
I am off the scale…ERROR…ERROR
“It’s not fair to tell our troops that they do not have the equipment they need”
What on earth does he mean by that??!!
Doesn’t he think that they already know he hasn’t provided them with the equipment that they need to stay alive.
Why? Does he not think that they will notice the lack of kit?
Yes, but it’s cruel to point it out to them. He’s accusing the Tories of not behaving according to accepted social norms, as when a child blurts out some uncomfortable comment like: ‘Why does Nana smell of wee?’
She knows, but the situation is not of her making and there is nothing that can be done about it now.
Ah but the situation of not enough/not the right equipment for the troops IS of Brown’s making so he needs to be questioned about it at every opportunity.
You have to admit that putting the State in charge of health care and then instituting a death tax is a stroke of genius.
Another target for the NHS to meet and a certain way of funding free cancer care.
At least we will know why we have the worst cancer survival rates in the developed world.
RUN!!!
Your crystal is black, time to report to the Sleepshop.
Al-Beeba reports…
1251 After today, MPs are off until 22 February – a 12-day break from proceedings in Parliament.
WTF is that all about, 12 days in the middle of Feb, is the HoC an educational establishment?!
If so then they get a week off while 99.9999% taxpayers work on.
Feck off you twats!!
half-term for the half-wits.
Just regard it as being 12 days when they can’t do any more harm :-/
Wrong, Government departments are still active. They are doing us harm 24/7/365.25
Another target for the NHS to meet and a certain way of funding free cancer care
I was going to write that. But I thought .I bet that fucking Moley has done it.so I scrolled down and he had.
We have found a cure for cancer – we off everyone before anyone can get it. Saves on pensions too.
Isn’t that what the bogus pig flu / made-up epidemic was supposed to do ?
- while also giving the big-bent pharma corporations a huge bung ?
Joking apart, the number ogf people I’ve spoken to who have been ill after their swine flu shots makes it look very possible that whatever was pumped into us was NOT intended to protect us. I received my order to report for injection – FRO, thank you very much, Doctor.
was Dave shit on purpose again?
it’s all part of a cunning plan