January 26th, 2010

Crowd Sourced Gossip : We Are All Watching Them Now

Guido is very much enjoying the growth of @eyespymp – in just a couple of days it has garnered nearly 1500 followers and is starting to bear more fruit than even its predecessor. Guido hears that some MPs are up in arms about invasion of their privacy and that hacks are chortling away. Though people are often too quick to dismiss her, Nadine was the first to clock that the Lobby might not be laughing for long: “The hacks are going to realise that @eyespymp may yet bite them on the bum!And indeed the penny is starting to drop.

Yvettte Cooper was outed earlier lunching with Polly Toynbee in the Atrium restaurant on Millbank. Whatever tit-bit she was trying to plant in tomorrow’s Guardian has had its source well and truly blown. Former hack-pack totty turned yummy-mummy Gaby Hinsliff* has had a moment of enlightenment:wow. @eyespymp is going to make it hard for lobby journalists to protect sources. start looking for more obscure lunch venues.” Lazy hacks might have to actually trundle even further than Shepherd’s at this rate.

*Is it just Guido that thinks Gaby might be missing the cut and thrust of Westminster life? She is tweeting away all day and he has seen her byline more times since she went to live a life of domestic rural bliss than when she was working for the Observer. Poor Mr Hinsliff must be close to a “it’s Twitter or me” moment.


  1. 1
    Pissed Off Constituent says:

    Anything that upsets those shifty fuckers has got to be good.

  2. 2
    Al Lane says:

    Thanks for that heads up. Am now following direct. And may be able to feed too.

  3. 3
    Al Lane says:

    And got to make the most of it, cos after the election we wont know most MPs from Joe or Josephine Bloggs, in fact they may well be J or J Bloggs.

  4. 4

    We’re all watching together.

  5. 5
    Stool Pigeon says:

    I wonder if Toynbee has managed to drop a Christmas log yet?

  6. 6
    concrete pump says:

    Cooper and Toynbee, a frightening duo of pseudo socialist harridans. Probably discussing where they are taking their ski holidays.

    Fucking hypocrites.

  7. 7
    AC1 says:

    Make them wear a High visibility bib with “WARNING: MP” on it, when they are in public.

  8. 8

    Us, watching them, watching us, watching them


  9. 9
    0.1% for £200 billion says:

    Twitter is a complete bunch of arse.

  10. 10
    jgm2 says:

    Nothing to hide = nothing to fear. Polly getting a briefing from Yvette about what a fucking terrific job her hubbies been doing and how the economy is finally soaring thanks to 300bn quid of printed money. Or perhaps the latest educational initiative from the bug-eyed jackass.

  11. 11
    Twatter says:

    Why not make some friends in the real world, turn the pc/phone/whatever off and go for a pint?

  12. 12
    anon,anon,anon.... says:

    Getting our own back for millions of CCTVs watching us……technology is a double edged sword.

  13. 13
    anon,anon,anon.... says:

    Foreign Secretary ” I come to Bananaland as a good friend of Orange County.”

  14. 14
    Stool Pigeon says:

    you sound like a funster, I bet you are all lycra, new world wines and extreme sports

  15. 15
    concrete pump says:

    “Nothing to hide = nothing to fear”.

    A phrase used by some MP’s who support ID cards.

    Boot’s on the other foot now.

  16. 16

    The problem with eyespymp is the fact that any sod can post a ‘sighting’ on there (or could the last time I checked anyway).
    How can anyone tell that the sightings are genuine, and will it fill up with ‘sightings’ of Gordon Brown and Piers Morgan juggling badgers at Watford Gap services?

  17. 17
    Taxman cometh says:

    No doubt both claiming for the bill on expenses.

  18. 18
    Nick Drew says:

    Poly Toynbee’s entire modus operandi is being briefed up to the eyeballs over lunch, and dropping a couple of selective, spoon-fed factoids into the next day’s op-ed

    it was never very difficult to figure out who’d been giving her one

    – – – – – –

    There’s a one-eyed yellow Scotsman of a dour and sullen hue
    There’s a stench of pious bullshit all around
    There’s a broken-heated woman dreams of socialism true
    And the yellow Scot forever lets her down

    He was known as Red McBroon, and he made the Party swoon
    Though his cowardice had long begun to smell
    But for all he was a wanker he was feted by the bankers
    And Polly Toynbee smiled on him as well

    He’d been stringing her along with his socialism strong
    She’d swallowed all he put into her head
    When she judged Blair’s time was short, she said Broon had her support
    Provided he would prove himself True Red

    He wrote to ask what promise she would like from Red McBroon
    They met for lunch as many times before
    And fervently she told him then that nothing else would do
    But his vote against Blair’s mad Iraqi war

    On the night of the debate, Red McBroon was in a state,
    His followers could bring mad Tony down
    But he’d never in his life had the balls to wield the knife
    For he knew the wielder never wears the crown

    When it came to the division, courage gave way to ambition
    And his scruples failed as surely as his balls
    When she heard them read the vote, fury welled up in her throat
    And ‘betrayal!’ was her cry around the halls

    Now Hell it hath no fury like a jilted Polly Toynbee
    First Blair and now McBroon had sold his soul
    As she stomped off in the night, for her op-ed piece to write
    She vowed vengeance on the yellow Scots arsehole

    There’s a one-eyed yellow Scotsman of a dour and sullen hue
    There’s a stench of pious bullshit all around
    There’s a broken-heated woman dreams of socialism true
    And the yellow Scot forever lets her down

  19. 19

    -says man on internet.

  20. 20
    anon,anon,anon.... says:

    You mean they can lie but we have to tell the truth?

  21. 21
    Clarence says:

    Is this what constitutes a ‘power lunch’ in 21st-century Britain?

    “Cooper and Toynbee, a frightening duo of pseudo socialist harridans.”

    I can’t say that I find either of them “frightening”. ‘Irritating’, ‘self-righteous’ and ‘priggish’ would be more appropriate terms, perhaps.

    However, I am surprised to hear that La Toynbee has been seen at Westminster: I thought she spent all her time at the BBC. I wonder if she took the Tube?

  22. 22
    H H says:


  23. 23
    concrete pump says:

    Tres bien. Very good indeed.

  24. 24
    Anonymous says:

    Whatever Yvette had to eat at the Atrium, I hope it choked her!

  25. 25
    Spank Sinatra says:

    Any ideas who paid for said lunch? Oh fuck me – probably the taxpayer! Silly question (sighs)………….

  26. 26
    R.McGeddon says:

    Nice one, N. Drew !!

  27. 27
    Anonymous says:

    Give it six months and Gaby will be bored shitless and she will be back, bigger brighter and bouncier than ever before.

    She is just biding her time until the shit hits the fan at Guardian Towers over the closure of the Observer.

    She may even end up Editor of the Indy. Maybe she’s using the time out to learn Russian ??

  28. 28
    R.McGeddon says:

    Ringing a bill, shouting ‘Unclaimed. unclaimed!’

  29. 29
    Spank Sinatra says:

    Just seen Brown and Morgan with some meerkats stuffed down their trousers at Tibthorpe Services (M1 junction 28). Question is how can they get so fast up the M1?

  30. 30
    Peter (Perma-tan) Hain says:

    Don’t drag me into this.

  31. 31
    Blue Rosette says:

    Gaby Hinsliff – yours

  32. 32
    Painful says:


  33. 33
    The Admiral says:

    OT But good

    Elizabeth Wilmshurst was awarded a standing ovation (a first at an enquiry)after her evidence and then went the the local for a livener.

    Don’t you just love it?

    Good girl…

  34. 34
    Interpretation ! Interpretation ! Interpretation ! says:

    To-day’s Law Officer witnesses may just have provided the “smoking gun”

  35. 35
    Engineer says:

    Pollytwaddle has her own chauffeur-driven Tube. So that she doesn’t have to soil her hands by mixing with the hoi-polloi that make up hard-working families.

  36. 36

    Theyre probably investigating this “free-meerkat economics” that Gordon heard about recently, thats why Gordon argued when the meerkat breeder wanted paying for them.

  37. 37
    KL says:

    Sweaty, rent-boy-perv, Mark Oaten has a temper tantrum on telly:


  38. 38
    I Spy says:

    spotted – Eric Pickles in a laundromat eating raw bacon while washing an enormous bear costume

  39. 39
    Dave says:

    Dirty shit-eating nonce

  40. 40
    I Spy says:

    spotted – Harriet Harman emerging from an adult video store with a full bag and a false beard

  41. 41
    I Spy says:

    spotted – Nadine Dorries feverishly operating a JCB Digger in her back garden in an attempt to kill the mole people who whisper in her ear at night

  42. 42
    Max says:

    Anyone know where Jack Straw was today whilst his role in the lead up to war was being cruelly exposed at the Chilcot enquiry?

    See: Never Mind The Legals Lets Get In There.

    Anyone know where his other face was too?

  43. 43
  44. 44
    glass coffee table says:

    The fat, sweaty prick, Oaten, is totally shameless. He’s hardly been off the TV and radio since getting caught out indulging in coprophilia with a scouse rent-boy.

  45. 45
    I Spy says:

    spotted – Lynne Featherstone running an underground budgie fighting gambling club in a disused car park in Wood Green

  46. 46
    GH says:

    Jack Straw exposed once again as a brazen liar. His muslim voters love him. Lying to the kaffirs/goyim is a requirement of their mediaeval religions.

  47. 47
    Cyco Billy says:

    ND 4:44

    Nice – and it fits with the tune to Squeeze’s ‘Take Me I’m Yours’, which would make a good refrain.

  48. 48
    Mr Ned says:

    So the useless, lazy,human scum, war-criminal bastards in the political lobby may actually have to *GASP ‘Work’ for a living?


    They only take what the fucking MP’s, or civil servants, write, and then copy and paste it into a screen, add their name to the fucking bottom of it and call it news.

    It’s all bollocks and the sooner these bottom feeders are strung up by the perineum the better.

    These fuckers rolled over and allowed Blair and the rest of those evil cock sucking, rimming, knob-jockey Neanderthals in the commons to ride roughshod over democracy, decency, justice and the rule of law to murder hundreds of thousands of men, women and children overseas and to set in motion the blatant theft of over a trillion pounds from our pockets to go to the banking wanking bastards in the city.

    These mainstream media bastards are as guilty as Blair is, for they knew the truth and they wilfully peddle more and more lies all the fucking time to prop-up the entire, false edifice of the establishment.

    Fuck them all.

  49. 49
    Cyco Billy says:

    Which, were it to have actually occurred in Bananaland, would surely have seen him being put straight into the tribal cooking pot as a foreign agent.

  50. 50
    P.Diddy Dacre says:

    “Is it just Guido that thinks Gaby might be missing the cut and thrust of Westminster life?”

    Who wouldn’t ?
    look at all the incredible scoops broken here lately because of amazing Westminster insider knowledge and sources

  51. 51
    Maladroit Labour Chump says:

    Don’t sugar-coat it, Mr. Ned. Tell it exactly how you see it.

  52. 52
    Goldfish says:

    He should have beem found dead with a satsuma orange in his mouth wearing womens underwear in the midst of sexual autoasphyxiation like a respectable MP

  53. 53
    sinosimon says:

    i think you’ll find that’s the fragrant Jacqui…….

  54. 54
    sinosimon says:

    if she can take eddie without gagging i think her stomach can be said to be pretty cast-iron…….

  55. 55
    genghiz the kahn says:

    has brown been sighted at selhurst park?


    now what was mcdoom and bust saying about football clubs?

  56. 56
    sinosimon says:

    at least it was a pre-digestion satsuma

  57. 57
    sinosimon says:

    there’s only one way to get rid of a mole………….

  58. 58
    Site foreman, Beddington Sewage Farm says:

    Not yet!

  59. 59
    Job Centre Plus says:

    Just put on this hooped black-and-white sweatshirt and get down there. Your job as a Belisha beacon started at 9 a.m.

  60. 60

    Update: They appear to hand-pick the ‘sightings'; for some reason they refused to believe that I just saw Sion Simon buying tights and oranges in Sainsburys…
    ….which I did, obviously

  61. 61
    Sub-editor says:

    No, she’s the “full bag”.

  62. 62
    caesars wife (aboard the dustcart) says:

    Mandelson vs Clarke on ch4 news 7pm watch for Mandelsons private investment line , totally misses capacity re balance , totally unfounded fairy story if you ask me .Ken did a marvelous job , its the differnetial even 2% growth at 0.5% interest rates doesnt do it ?

  63. 63
    Gravel Pitt, Brad's more talented brother says:

    You DON’T TALK about the underground budgie fighting gambling club.

  64. 64
    Banana Skiner says:

    I come to Palestine as a friend of Israel

  65. 65
  66. 66
    How the arrogant are fallen says:

    Off Topic:

    Torygraph reporting today that the IPCC now claims that its reports are made by people who are only human. This is in repsonse to the discovery that some glaciers are not melting as claimed in their 2007 report. Hmm, previously the IPCC viewed their reports as received wisdom akin to religious dogma. So, we have the CRU fiddling the figures, the IPCC claiming melting glaciers… What a bunch of tricksters.


  67. 67
    Jackass Straw says:

    Accountancy is not my strongest suit when it comes to expenses either…

  68. 68
    AC1 says:

    300 billion in borrowing = 0.2% public sector growth.

    Wow that investment will pay off…
    What’s the %age interest on that 300 billion…

  69. 69
    AC1 says:

    I’ll work it out for you.


    It’s a 3% fall.

    Great “investment” Gordo.

  70. 70
    Local Plumber £5K per first 10 mins says:

    Cracked the pan

  71. 71
    Tet a tet says:

    Is Guido the new “Eyes Only”?

  72. 72
    kulak class says:

    slightly off topic but on the subject of toynbee thinking marxists check out this on will straws blog….


    ‘Ban private schools….They perpetuate the gross inequalities in the UK; this can only be addressed if they are erased completely.

    The two other alternatives which might be more palatable to our politicians are taxing the life out of those that can afford private education (almost impossible), or paying teachers in state education more than those employed privately to drain public schools of their best resource. We do this in many other public sectors to attract the best talent, so why not in education?’

  73. 73
    Labour Tao says:

    Man of Straw sway with the wind, upright men are broken

  74. 74
  75. 75
    Steve Expat says:

    There’s obviously an editor/moderator checking what goes up there – and a tenner (to charity) says that Guido knows who he or she is…

  76. 76
    This is Gordon Brown's Britain. says:

    BBC News;

    “Simon Heaton, 17, of St Helens, pleaded guilty to rape, sexual assault and causing grievous bodily harm.

    He was previously protected by a court order which banned the publication of his identity.

    Heaton was jailed indefinitely at Liverpool Crown Court and ordered to serve a minimum of five years.

    On Monday, the court heard how Heaton first struck in parkland near his home in St Helens, Merseyside, in April 2009.

    Debbie Gould, prosecuting, said: “He began to follow his victim, who was three weeks short of her 11th birthday, and stare at her.

    He grabbed hold of her and despite her resistance pushed her into some bushes.

    The sick monster who is in court today took my little girl’s childhood away from her
    Victim’s mother

    “She was trying to scream for help but he said to her, ‘If you shout one more time, I’ll break your neck’.”

    So this scum – a product of Brown and Blair – is sentenced to just 5 years.

    Oh – by the way,at the time of this crime,he was on bail for the rape of a 10 yr old girl.

    No wonder Gordon Brown doesn’t sleep at night.

  77. 77
    Steve Expat says:

    They probably asked for two copies of the receipt though…

  78. 78
    MILLS AND BOOM and BUST says:

    Mr I Spy
    i spotted Alistair darling in an Abacus repair shop apparently all his beads had fallen off !
    And he didn’t have enough fingers to do his job

  79. 79
    NUT ter says:

    Lets give it a try

  80. 80
    Straw - an example of excrement says:

    Take him apart with a baseball bat – only language these utter c*unts will ever know.

  81. 81
    Engineer says:

    PM Programme on Radio 4 reported Chilcott asking “But is not Jack Straw a lawyer himself?” Miss Wilmshurst reponded quite sharply, “He’s not an international lawyer” provoking chuckles from the public present – and from Chilcott himself.

    It is heartening to think that the Civil Service might still contain people of Elizabeth Wilmshurst’s ilk. Given the chance, it should recover from the depredations of the last decade. Let us hope that the rest of us can, too.

  82. 82
    Steve Expat says:

    Why don’t we lock up the little shits? What the fuck is someone doing on bail when accused of raping a child?


    He was sentenced “indefinitely” with a 5 year minimum, which is actually harsher than a 10 year sentence. He has to prove he is suitable for release (which ain’t happening) after a minimum of 5 years – whereas with a 10 year sentence he would be automatically released after 5 years.

    The new indeterminate setences are actually a step forward, but the way they are announced by judges and reported by the press make them seem relatively lenient.

  83. 83
    AC1 says:

    Society isn’t broken*, bit the state is.

    *Though It has been damaged by subsidising immigration and thus low quality immigrants.

  84. 84
    JACK (Yellow Belly) STRAW says:

    My father was also one of the “Dead Beat Dad’s ” That we in the Labour party Encourage to keep moving around the country knocking up every loose slapper they can find ,then fucking off leaving the tax payers to pick up the tab andkeeping the police and prison service in full time employment !

  85. 85
    Engineer says:

    One size fits all = lowest common denominator.

    Surely even the most blinkered lefty can work out that if there’s no competition, there’s no incentive to do better. See NHS for details.

  86. 86
    AC1 says:

    Harrison Bergeron


    THE YEAR WAS 2081, and everybody was finally equal. They weren’t only equal before God and the law. They were equal every which way. Nobody was smarter than anybody else. Nobody was better looking than anybody else. Nobody was stronger or quicker than anybody else. All this equality was due to the 211th, 212th, and 213th Amendments to the Constitution, and to the unceasing vigilance of agents of the United States Handicapper General.

    Some things about living still weren’t quite right, though. April for instance, still drove people crazy by not being springtime. And it was in that clammy month that the H-G men took George and Hazel Bergeron’s fourteen-year-old son, Harrison, away.

    It was tragic, all right, but George and Hazel couldn’t think about it very hard. Hazel had a perfectly average intelligence, which meant she couldn’t think about anything except in short bursts. And George, while his intelligence was way above normal, had a little mental handicap radio in his ear. He was required by law to wear it at all times. It was tuned to a government transmitter. Every twenty seconds or so, the transmitter would send out some sharp noise to keep people like George from taking unfair advantage of their brains.

  87. 87
    AC1 says:

    The important thing is that there are customers with a choice.

    In the National Death service you are a cost, not a customer.

  88. 88
    Beware the ides of March says:

    It is now clear that a March Election may well be on the cards. Labour have produced results which can be spun to show the economy is recovering ( yes I know its nonsense but thats not the point), already their strategy is to harp on about how the recovery must not be damaged by the evil tories. That is the narrative they have embarked upon.

    It is way to risky for them to wait until the next set of figures later in the year which may not be so easily spun.

    Their “best chance” is to go as soon as possible.

    I know that Brown would dither but I belive Mandleson will have the upper hand in deciding this.

    A couple of other points to ponder.

    What was the unexpected gathering of the cabinet about the other day? Could it be to decide this matter ?

    Bob Ainsworths so called Slip of the Tounge was nothing of the sort. His announcement was very deliberate, it was a poor attempt to wrongfoot the opposition.

    An early election will also mean Chilcott is put on ice. Handy for Gordon.

    March it is then.

  89. 89
    History says:

    ” erased completely” = crystal night

  90. 90
    The Admiral says:

    Thanks Steve. I did wonder…

  91. 91
    Charlie's mum says:

    Is that you, Charlie? Time to come in for your tea!

  92. 92
    Anonymous says:

    dont forget Elizabeth Firkin another heroine.

  93. 93
    Dr Sorders says:

    What “gems” of real wisdom and information that Boy Cooper may impart could easily be written on the tip of an ant’s c*ck using a 4″ wide paintbrush.

  94. 94
    Anonymous says:

    Yes and in another age these type of fuckers would have burnt you at the stake for daring to disagree with them !

  95. 95
    Mr Slater's Parrot says:


  96. 96
    Anonymous says:

    Step forward my arse. Hang these fuckers !

  97. 97
    Dismal Dave says:

    Unlike my guarantees.

  98. 98
    Anonymous says:

    Jack Straw will forever be known as The Amoral Snake. See The Slog.
    His son will be no better.

  99. 99
    jgm2 says:

    We don’t want to do it, Will, because the risk is that a fuckwit such as yourself will be the pinnacle of state education’s output as opposed to the ‘slow’ child who has to do GCSEs instead of the IB at private school.

    That’s why.

    Now you can go and fuck yourself Will.


  100. 100
    jgm2 says:

    From a crane. The Iranians have the right idea in such matters.

  101. 101
    This is Gordon Brown's Britain. says:

    And if it was your 10 yr old child?

    You cocksucker, you know you wouldn’t say this shit – you would be standing outside the prison when he comes out,with a Transit van and 20 friends to bury the c*unt in a nearby woodland.

  102. 102
    jgm2 says:

    You might want to read what he wrote again.

  103. 103
    jgm2 says:


  104. 104
    Straw - hang him,disembowel him. says:

    Straw – junkie,druggie,coward,”lawyer – yeah right,not an international one,cue mocking laughter from the audience”,useless fuck.

    Now that’s the father described,let’s move on to the son.

  105. 105
    concrete pump says:

    Completely OT.. Palace have just gone into administration. Get your wallet out Noades.

  106. 106
    Dec says:

    Could people stop writing Yvette Cooper’s pearls of wisdom on my mate’s c*ck?

  107. 107
    Straw - hang him,disembowel him. says:

    He will be released and allowed out,probably at the age of 25 – 30 yrs of age.

    What can possibly happen within that time that will stop this scum from doing exactly the same when he is 30/40/50/60/70 yrs of age?

    He needs to be either put to death or kept inside forever.

    This country has become so damned scared of fighting back – the whole focus is on the criminal and not on the victim or potential victim.

    It is time the people of this country stood up and were counted – ignore Brown and his thugs who shout “police” whenever you take a photo,have a go at a burglar or simply try to protect yourself or your loved ones.

  108. 108
    Gordon "now I have you pension" Brown says:

    It was the right thing to do.

  109. 109
    Gordon's favourite Butt Plug says:

    Mr Ned, as long as that makes thing better! Good to let it out. I encourage it.

    Otherwise depression can set in. Hardly surprising with these munchkins trying to run the show.


  110. 110
    Ant says:

    Fuck off, I love those wide brushstrokes.

  111. 111
    Gordon's favourite Butt Plug says:


  112. 112
    Gordon's favourite Butt Plug says:

    Couldn’t cope with Twitter, This and Life.

    There would be no time to breathe!

  113. 113
    Gordon's favourite Butt Plug says:

    Just 2?

  114. 114
    Anonymous says:

    Why don’t we lock up the little shits? What the fuck is someone doing on bail when accused of raping a child?

    Why? Because socialists find criminals useful as vehicles for social unrest.

  115. 115
    nell says:


    I see there might be quite a lot of people watching out for bliar now that someone has launched a website to encourage people to make a citizen’s arrest for war crimes. The fund to reward anyone who gets close enough to arrest him currently stands at £7468.97 and that’s only after one day. It’ll be fun to watch the fund grow day on day and see if anyone has a go.

    Thank you gordon for your 97pence.

  116. 116
    What Guido won't tell you says:

    More trivia from Guido,

    The country has been taken over by the EU with the help of the bilderberger MPs, a scientist murdered and covered up for the next 70 years and Guido distracts you with this personality bollocks!

    `Political` xfactor for the sheep!

  117. 117
    concrete pump says:

    Sorry Genghiz, didn’t see your post.

  118. 118
    Gordon's favourite Butt Plug says:

    The Indian Chair of the IPCC is one arrogant MF. Maybe that he has scammed loads of money in loads of ways, and gotten huge rewards for TATA closing Redcar, and being paid in Carbon Money to do it. 1700 British Jobs that we will pay for twice. Once for the new investment in India, and secondly for all the benefits payable to those laid off.

  119. 119
    Smash Labour says:

    Mandelsbum on Channel 4 News, has he got a black eye? His left eye looks like someone has smacked him one. I hope so.

  120. 120
    streamfisher says:

    Very logical, but then we also know Brown as the bottler, and Browns Bette Noire is an election, he has never been elected by anyone (given a choice would anybody?). He will leave it until the last possible moment and hope for an excuse not to hold an election at all……severe warning?

  121. 121
    Smash Labour says:

    Fucking leftie rent boy Snow keeps cutting Ken Clarke off to let Fondelbum speak as well.

  122. 122
    Anonymous says:

    Yvette Balls and Polly Toynbee lunching together? MEOW!!

    PS. only 2 Ts in Yvette Guido.

  123. 123
    Gordon's favourite Butt Plug says:

    Blair may be hated more than Brown. A truly remarkable feat. Personally I hate Cherie Blair more than both of them combined. It may be irrational, illogical, but it just feels so right.

    She really is EVIL.

  124. 124
    Munter Hunter says:

    Fucking ugly pair of whores

  125. 125
    WE ARE OUT OF RECESSION (So I'm Off to Save The Irish) says:

    I would just like to thank Alistair for the remarkable job he has done
    in producing the massive rise in the economy with the stroke of a pen !

  126. 126
    TERROR says:

    U just Know new anti Terror laws will make it unlawful to report on MPs whereabouts at all times 24/7/365

  127. 127
    Lord Mandelslime says:

    Or to report the election of any MP who doesn’t actively support the strides we have made in combating racism (i.e. those who oppose membership of the EU).

    Where is my Maserati?

  128. 128
    rocknrolla says:

    “stupid” is, I still think, the best term for both

  129. 129
    WE ARE OUT OF RECESSION (So I'm Off to Save The Irish) says:

    MangledBum: We Should Not Talk Down OUR Economic Recovery !
    FFS !
    If you tried to talk down O.O5 %
    It Would only take O.O5 of a second !

  130. 130

    Mandy versus Clarke on C4

    Pure cage fighting

  131. 131
    streamfisher says:

    Blair being the straight good upstanding kind’a guy he is, put in place a 24/7 security arrangement in perprituetry payed for by you the taxpayer (Cost at least £1 million a year) just before he handed over to Mc Ruin, about the time the shredding machine was going into meltdown. So, to anyone thinking about making a citizens arrest on Blair you are not likely to get through the wall of ‘Minders’.

  132. 132
    Cheese Lover says:

    I don’t understand this, Brown’s still in NI isn’t he:


    Davos police commander ‘commits suicide’

  133. 133
    GORDON I'M McBUST says:

    It’s all that was left in the treasury !

    But now I’ve fixed the economy There’ll be rakes of cash comming in for me to spend,spend,spend to help me win the GE ! Yarhoooooooo !

  134. 134
    nell says:

    She is the most greedy, grasping person I think I have ever seen in public life.

    But really how the bliars and the browns have brought 10 Downing Street into such disrepute!!

    Harold Wilson was pretty awful, with his kitchen cabinet and his lavender lady, but he was nowhere near as catastrophically bad as this lot have been!

    gordon though is, by a long way, the absolute worst, failed, incompetent PM this country has ever had!

  135. 135
    Jacqboot's local kebab shop owner says:

    Fragrant? I think not. We all dread that moment late at night when the beast as we affectionately call her comes stomping in, her husband at home relieving himself – at taxpayer expense – while she goes looking for food. Normally wants 4 or 5 kebabs, fries, cola, loads of mayo, we can smell her coming a good 5 minutes before she arrives. I just hope Labour win so I can keep the illegal immigrants working.

  136. 136
    nell says:

    My prayer for gordon is that when his time comes he is given a pauper’s funeral with no mourners. Having said that, my prayer for bliar is much the same.

  137. 137
    GORDON I'M McBUST says:

    when todays two witnesses finished giving evidence today at the Iraq enquiry
    The gallery broke into applause
    Unpresidented at this enquiry acording to C4 news !

  138. 138
    Engineer says:

    Are the days of the Lobby numbered?

    Press briefings can now be fed by video link to any number of locations. No need for photocopied handouts – documents can be uploaded to official websites for anyone to access. Interviews can be sought by any reputable news organisation. Broadcast and print media are embracing the web, and communication technologies are developing. Even a hick from the sticks such as myself can be aware of developing news in and around parliament within hours, sometimes minutes, without waiting for tomorrow’s papers, or even the 10 O’Clock News.

    Technology changes things. Communication technology is changing fast – bewilderingly fast for someone like me schooled before personal computers where common, and when phones needed wires. Journalism and politics will have to adapt to the new technologies and the things it makes possible, whether they like it or not. If it makes it easier to hold politicians instantly to account, it might be a good thing – if it makes it harder for them to conceal dodgy dealings, we’ll all be better for it.

    All this electrickery wizardry still bamboozles me, though. As far as I’m concerned, a blackberry is tasty soft fruit, currently out of season. So I’m off to service the tin cans and taut string. And twittering is for birdies.

  139. 139

    Can’t we all contribute to the cost of having one of the new Kent police pilotless drones in a holding pattern over the HoC?

  140. 140
    Half eyed Scottish idiot says:

    Oh dear, Jonah must have gone to see Brenda last week

  141. 141
    andy says:

    I thought you said that gaby woman was fit?

  142. 142
    Kim Novak says:

    Is it true that the beautiful Mrs Balls now drives a cerise metal-flake finish Porche Cayenne 4×4, with the numberplate YC 40W?

  143. 143
    Anonymous says:

    That is true but I’m not at all sure that Brown is the deciding voice in this. Im still not convinced he will stand anyway.

  144. 144
    C&S curch (West Africa & London) says:

    He doesn’t look much like a boiler, more a spare rib

  145. 145
    Engineer says:

    A Drone at the HoC? That’s Michael White isn’t it?

  146. 146
    Anonymous says:

    Wouldn waste my time buring this piece of evil shit. Lerave his rotten corpse on display as a warning to those other sick fuckers still out there.

  147. 147
  148. 148

    The Drones Club.

  149. 149
  150. 150
    Sting's Beard says:

    Yes it is and unfortunately its being rammed right up our hows yer father

  151. 151
    Hello Ladies says:

    Don’t take dating advice from a pisshead like Guido, he’ll hook you up with some right munters thanks to his beer googles.

  152. 152
    Sting's Beard says:

    My secrets out!

  153. 153
    eyespymp says:

    phew, Polly has stunk the cubicle out, I would cut down on the meat intake love

  154. 154
    Engineer says:

    Beer googles?

    Damned internet wallahs are taking over everything. First information dissemination, now brewing.

  155. 155
    Unsworth says:

    Yes, but she did not say that Straw has not acted as a lawyer for decades – whereas she has. I thought her evidence was superb – as did everyone in the Gallery who broke into spontaneous (and unprecedented) applause after she had finished. She was clear, convincing and transparent. A welcome change.

    Beckett was, frankly, garbage.

  156. 156
    nell says:


    I do hope Benedict Brogan of the Telegraph is wrong – but he is saying the chilcott inquiry is going to be just another labour whitewash just like the hutton rubbish.

    As for hutton surely now his findings are going to be challenged in a Court of Law , given that eleven! eminent coroners and medical personnel and Norman Baker are stating unequivocably that Dr Kelly was murdered.!!!

  157. 157
    AC1 says:

    > She is the most greedy, grasping person I think I have ever seen in public life.

    Hey what about Kinnochio?

  158. 158
    Smash Labour says:

    That’s “Sir” Michael Shite to you sonny.

  159. 159
  160. 160
    Smash Labour says:

    I can’t tell when shit is coming out of her arse or her gob.

  161. 161
    Smash Labour says:

    Mandy made a tool of himself and I swear he had a shiner on his left eye, or makeup. I hope Ronaldo isn’t smacking him about :)

  162. 162
    Australian says:

    “Palace have just gone into administration”

    Crystal or Buckingham?

  163. 163
  164. 164
    Sting's Beard says:

    Two BILDEBERGERS together. My Latin is not brilliant but I will take a stab at it.

    Posterior Posterium Fricat, which roughly translated means the Arse rubs the Arse!

  165. 165
    jon says:

    Mandelson lost the plot. The man’s a fucking head the ball.

  166. 166
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:


  167. 167
    Down with Brown! says:

    I spied Gordon and his cabinet screwing up the country. NuLabour have been doing it since May 1997.

  168. 168
    Sting's Beard says:

    Burning at the stake is a bit heavy on the carbon, They’d probably have you Frozen at the pole. But then they cant do that if all the ice has gone. Hell punishment is a confusing business.

  169. 169
    Down with Brown! says:

    When Tony Blair and Gordon Brown enter the hall they will get booed.

  170. 170
    Down with Brown! says:

    Did Gordon visit Croydon recently?

  171. 171
    Sting's Beard says:

    I take it you are referring to the WHS the World Health Service formerly known as the NHS

  172. 172
    Down with Brown! says:

    Left Foot Forward = another blog for ugly Marxist students jealous that their posh contemporaries pull all the birds.

  173. 173
    Hello Ladies says:

    ding dong

  174. 174
    Blindingly Obvious says:

    The Blatant truth is those two (Clarke and Mandelson) are far far better people to run this country than Cameron and Brown.

  175. 175
    Down with Brown! says:

    Elizabeth Wilmshurst should be made Dame Wilmshurst. Her Majesty should reward all those who chould the courage to stand up to the NuLabour stasi.

  176. 176
    Anonymous Misogynist says:

    nell, it isn’t gonna happen and you know it..

  177. 177
    Sting's Beard says:

    Why dont we hold the election on the internet and then just give Brown his marching orders . Its no use waiting for him to do the decent thing. He hasn’t got a single democratic bone in his body.

  178. 178
    Get Blair says:

    Gosh, this new site is now taking in serious dosh.


  179. 179
    Hello Ladies says:

    Goggles indeed, I stand corrected sir/madam. Too much of the tio pepe myself obviously, QED those without sin cast the first stone…lessons have been learned etc. etc.

  180. 180
    Hello Ladies says:

    Blair probably set it up himself.

    He would do anything for his silver pieces.

  181. 181
    Sting's Beard says:

    What does the C stand for?

  182. 182
    Hello Ladies says:

    Someone once commented about Mandelson being a leviathan under the water or something, I can’t recall the exact quote just the gist, but it was very clever and summed him up to a tee.

  183. 183
    Anonymous says:

    How is he a product of Brown and Blair? Can every nutter who commits unspeakable crimes be attributed to the incumbent government? It’s so idiotic that I suspect you must be from somewhere like Hampshire or Suffolk. Only the inbred reprobates of such place could come up with shite like that.

  184. 184
    Silver Peaches says:

    Ducats to you ducky.

  185. 185
    fudge packer says:

    Up shit creek more like.

  186. 186
    cut out smacks between meals says:

    You mean you hope he is smacking him about.

  187. 187
    Tathos says:

    I got the feeling they were having an affair. They were even finishing each other’s sentences, so maybe it’s been going on a while.

  188. 188
    Sting's Beard says:

    Mandleson is like a statistican, That is he can stick his head in an oven and his backside in a freezer and say that on average he is feeling just fine!

  189. 189
    bergen says:

    In any earlier time,Straw would have now resigned.Instead we have to put up with the deceitful toad until the election as a living testament to Labour’s mendacity.

    I read in some paper recently that Straw the Spliff junior was blaming Blair for involving his father in Iraq.He should look closer to home.Good old hereditary Labour.

  190. 190
    nell says:


    Elizabeth Wilmshurst – the absolute hero of the Chilcott Inquiry. And my Hero of the day!!

    Even if chilcott decides to make his inquiry a whitewash in favour of gordon’s and bliar’s government, her testimony will stand, as solid gold, in the world of dross that gordon and bliar have given us.

    Straw in his arrogance and pig ignorant scrablbe for high office ignored her and her boss. Her boss chose to stay because he thought he could get even more ennoblement for his loyalty. She chose to resign because her conscience was honorable!!

    I note that the BBC gave her scant attention , giving more attention to the costa coffee book prize!!!

  191. 191
    Anonymous says:

    I’m sure you are right. Cameron and Osborne are just as bad as Brown and Darling. If our democracy is so best why does it ignore sane opinions and ideas from the wise?

  192. 192
    Turnpikey says:

    no, because Haringey Council’s spy camera smart car would be round to give you a penalty charge pronto

  193. 193
    Muhktab says:

    can we have an eyespymp with pictures?

    I want also to know our mps have nothing hide.

  194. 194
    Anonymous Misogynist says:

    nell, on this I totally agree. Spot on..!!

  195. 195
    Tathos says:

    I think Ken is cooling off. Barbie will be doing on of these next…

  196. 196
    Muhhktab says:

    can we have an eyespymp with pictures?

    I want also to know our mps have nothing hide.

  197. 197
    nell says:

    If we’re talking about an inquest into Dr Kelly’s death – I think it will happen – I think it must happen – But I don’t think it will happen until after the next GE.

    And the main suspects ie bliar, campbell, balls, whelan etc in respect of a verdict that Dr Kelly was killed unlawfully, (bit like the unlawful war in Iraq Hmmmmm?) will be far away in other parts of the world and therefore unreachable by British Law!!

    No doubt Jack Straw will be trying to join them abroad somewhere!!

  198. 198
    Muhhktab says:

    Are you available for after dinner speaking?

    “And it reminds me of the time someone said something to me. I cant remember what they said but it was verr, verr funny”

  199. 199
    stilyagi_air_corps says:

    Pseudo-Socialists? I’d say they were the real thing: 100% echt Britsoc.

  200. 200
    stilyagi_air_corps says:

    Green Lanes… Mmmmm… kebabs… drool…

  201. 201
    South of the M4 says:

    Indeed there will be no justice if they do not.

  202. 202
    Muhhktab says:

    Mandelson’s microphone was louder than clarke’s.

    All the better to talk over you deary.

  203. 203
    Epicurean says:

    True. It is quite difficullt to decide whether it is her lips or sphincter you are watching.

  204. 204
    Cheese Sandwich says:

    Quite agree, Mr Ned, and I’ve got depression to boot

  205. 205
    Can'tHelpButShout@TheTVwhenGordo'sOn says:

    I frickin’ hate Polly Toynbee.

    Contrary frickin’ Mary (Polly).

  206. 206
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    CW is obviously very upset at CRU and IPPC , and current back peddling being put out only rubs salt in it . Its no so much the 5 odd years spent encouraging green technology and putting huge ammounts of personal research into it , its the fact that these so called scientific masters , who had eluded to the mass effects of mans energy useage , using huge computers and brilliant brains and programs , got a global movement that was rather unscientific , aided and abetted by certain politics .

    Naturally this goes against the subject of science and is particulary upsetting as it was such a big and important subject , there are other examples of science political conspiracy to make markets , but this particular one is due to scale is beyond what you might call “a mistake” .

    While for now driving the jag can revert to fun again , there are still a few problems . new oil reserves enable the internal combustion engine to have an extended ecnomic life , there is still the problem of where other stuff goes and the importance of ensuring ecosystems work and perhaps letting nature do its own thing free from mans commercial instincts and pollution .

    So even if CO2 scare theory has been shot down , it doesnt make the challenges of feeding , clothing and housing 6bn people much less of a problem with unwelcome eco effects , which the socialist greens see as being a future . CW thinks not so , it is perfectly possible for capitalist market models to react both quicker and with more effect , yes it does mean preserving and perhaps re growing some important eco systems such as forests . It also means accepting that things such as clean air water and land , are the ultimate provider economies even if not defined in monetary terms . going back to the real life ecnomic story of how the dodo died and repeating it ,is not on . There are still limits , natural laws even which need to valued and respected .

    There is no doubt relief short to medium term about energy , but it must not excuse the idea that eco damage is somthing that doesnt matter .

    The IPCC handouts and money waste is very unfortunate , as if it had approached the eco problems , many countries would be starting to impliment the right sort of long term perspective , economic models , instead of the socialist fraud ones .

  207. 207
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    Mr straw has not come out to well has he from this principalled lady .

  208. 208
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    No I distinctly heard that he was the winner of a Liarthon

  209. 209
    anon,anon,anon.... says:

    Just TWEET?

  210. 210
    Mr Slater's Parrot says:

    U-UUURRRKK!!! (choke) (hack) SQUIIIIIIRRRK…

  211. 211
    nell says:

    I think I am going to watch for pollytwaddle’s diatribes over the next few days to see which one’s have been influenced by the taxpayers heavily subsidised balls /cooper insertions!!!

  212. 212
    Steve Expat says:

    It’s “BONG”


    stupidest use of social networking site #27

  213. 213
    Steve Expat says:

    Prize for the first person to have a go now up to £2,000.

    If it’s done properly they can’t arrest you for attempting a citizen’s arrest on Bliar…

  214. 214
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    could be the 60s classic the “odd couple” only in this one the tall thin suntanned one is actually a global crook .

  215. 215
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    Yes I thought I had terrets at first , but now I hear of so many people with the same condition around 60mn people in this country apparently .

  216. 216
    AC1 says:


  217. 217
    nell says:

    ome out too well!!

    He looks more odious than an asian night soil carrier!!!

  218. 218
    nell says:

    Come out too well!! (Where did my c go!)

  219. 219
  220. 220
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    expect articles like Ed Balls was right to say that milk should go in the cup before the tea and not tea before which the conservatives have included etc etc , anything but admitt they are busted corrupt bunch of crooks.

  221. 221
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    could I have a vowel next please carol

  222. 222
    Anonymous Misogynist says:

    We’re talking about both nell. Bliar cannot and will not be prosecuted, as much as I dislike the arrogant son of a bitch. He and we will have his/our day on friday, it will have to suffice. He knows that we know and we know that he knows that we know, let it rest on his conscience to his demise..

    Jack Straw, let’s hope Chilcott and his panel grow a pair and refute his original evidence..

  223. 223
    AC1 says:

    Sorry for being ignorant but I don’t get the reference.

  224. 224
    Slotgob says:

    Another ten grand and I’ll arrest him…

  225. 225
    jgm2 says:


    I have had an(other) idea of genius.

    At the moment Brown holds the cards regarding election timing. Now on balance he will dither and dither and dither and the election will be in June.

    But he risks the Q1 2010 figures showing we’re back in recession.

    Thing is – Cameron has oodles of cash for his election campaign and Brown’s party, like his government, is bank*rupt. So Brown will be going for a short, sharp election when he gets to book all the advertising hoardings ‘cos he knows what the date will be. Except he won’t. It will be on June 3rd. But Cameron can’t be sure of that.

    With me so far?

    What Cameron needs to do is call a Tory party conference for (say) the week before April 28th – the day when Brown’s economy officially tips back into the shitter.. Right now. A pre-election Tory Conference. Masses of media exposure. Brown and his jackasses wiped off the radar. Cameron buys himself a week of TV coverage unopposed.

    The beauty is that he doesn’t have to actually organise a conference. He can just let it be known that he’s thinking of doing such a thing.

    Now suddenly Brown is worried that Cameron will be able to get a bundle of his spare cash out there in an attention-grabbing way any time he chooses. Suddenly Brown is trying to second-guess the Tories rather than the other way around.

    It’ll eat him alive.


    I commend it to the House.

  226. 226
    Linkenjaeger says:

    And you reside where, Sir?

  227. 227
    Anonymous Misogynist says:

    Give this man a cigar..

  228. 228
    Happyness Stan says:

    Mr Ned

    Love it, simply love it.

    Now all we need is for around 20 million or so more of us suckers to finally get the perfectly horrendous picture, and we might start to kick some serious arse.

    However may I very strongly suggest that we do whatever we MUST do as peacefully, and lawfully as humanly possible?

    Remember the parking, police services and armed forces are also one of us, although when they are pointing a riffle at our wives and loved ones heads, while checking our ID cards, this may seem almost impossible to achieve.

    Of course the one thing to very much remember are the establishment owned scumbags we all trusted, who helped so very much to get us into this hopelessly debt enslaved mess, which is the ENTIRE main stream media in general, and the BBC very very much in particular.

    Polly Toynbee at this point should be given a special mention, as well as Rupert Murdoch, Nick Robinson and Andrew Marr.

    One other thing to remember, a fully provoked, organized by them, and therefore very much predicted TAX strike is what the ID card is really all about, which will without doubt rapidly morph into an ID chip.

    What they really want is your cash, and more specifically the product of your own hard work and productivity. If you don’t allow them to take/ thieve it, they will simple take you permanently out.

  229. 229
    South of the M4 says:

    Stupidest yes. And as informative as PMQ on Wednesdays.

  230. 230
    Monica Lewinsky says:

    I’ve got one he can have…

  231. 231
    barefootcontessa says:

    I understood that you were in favour of the war v Iraq Nell?

  232. 232
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    Sorry but cant stop laughing , Fabian Solutions has been defeated on lord tebbits blog and thrown a hissy fit 6:36 , deluded or what !

    Fabricated solutions

  233. 233
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    yeah good idea , but you will keep it secret wont you !

  234. 234
    resurgemus says:

    Or Lord Ashcroft buys a chunk of Labour’s debt.

    Gives it a week or two then hits them with a winding up order to repay or else- hey presto no Labour party election fund; maybe no Labour party.

  235. 235
    Just saying says:

    He did win his seat

  236. 236
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    Darling on newsnight 10:30 , if he lies does a large claxon horn sound , and his chair tips back into a vat of hungry crocodiles !!

    Tuck in paxman , it should be court no2 not newsnight

  237. 237
  238. 238
    jgm2 says:

    But would the Co-op Bank sell the Labour parties debt? Because if the would then I’d be willing to buy some with Lord Ashcroft and write the fucking thing off for the greater good.

  239. 239
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    Is “hey presto” , a new daytime show , sort of like supermarket sweep , but with Robert Preston baggin a pre parliament leak from the ruin .

  240. 240
    nell says:


    dear hillary is incensed that the meeja’s view of US aid to Haiti is that that aid is shrouded in a mantle of massive incompetence!!

    Her government’s incompetence so absolutely , completely mirror’s gordon’s inadequacies

  241. 241
    jgm2 says:

    No. He didn’t win his seat. He was awarded his seat by the Labour heirarchy. His constituents would elect a used sanitary towel with a red rosette. It is what is known as a ‘safe seat’. You don’t have to win the seat – you only have to ‘win’ the nomination.

    It’s what John Prescott was trying to organise for his son. A nice safe seat. Hull. Highest unemployment rate in the UK. 80 or so uninterrupted years of Labour MPs. An electorate that takes loyalty to the same extreme as battered wives who refuse to call the police.

    That’s Brown’s constituency.

  242. 242
    resurgemus says:

    doesn’t have to be the co-op, what about all the private donors promised a knighthood who ain’t getting one ?

  243. 243
    Just saying says:

    When she wrote of hhher contraceptive equipment I assumed she was referring to her face

  244. 244
    R.McGeddon says:

    AC1: in Biblical times, those unfortunate wretches who had leprosy had to be segregated from the rest of society. If they ventured beyond their leper colonies they had to carry a bell which they had to ring and shout ‘Unclean.unclean’. Troughing MPs ought to be forced to carry such bells when they venture outside the Palace of Westminster.

  245. 245
    jgm2 says:

    What? Buy the debt off them? Good idea. Plus Cameron could reward their service. With the passage of time. At the appropriate juncture…

    But are there any records? Or did they have to class them as ‘donations’.

  246. 246
    Moley says:

    If Brown goes for a March election it can be guaranteed that (as with Copenhagen) the weather will be uncooperative and all the Labour voters will stay indoors sheltering from rain, snow, sleet, meteorites, gales, hurricanes, tornados and advancing glaciers.

    Bring it on.

  247. 247
    jgm2 says:

    Hilary should come right back and give the fuckers both barrels.

    We’re doing our best. We’ve got ten times as many people on site as any other fucker. If you don’t like it we’ll fuck off and leave the UN to organise it. After all they’ve done a terrific job all the time they’ve been here.

  248. 248
    Steve Expat says:

    Looking forward to it already.

    T minus ten…

  249. 249
    resurgemus says:

    Don’t parties have to record who their major donors are ?

    I’d just look for a mate of Charles Clarke on the list, then buy a truss to keep my bollocks on when I’m laughing.

    One thing Gordon’s not short of is enemies !

  250. 250
    Fony Blair says:

    Although Clarke did lie about not saying he’d suggested lowering VAT – http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article5209367.ece

  251. 251
    Just saying says:

    I stand corrected

  252. 252
    AC1 says:

    I don’t see the French Carrier in their Ex-Colony…

  253. 253
    AC1 says:

    Government Starts to call the ClimateGate emails a LEAK rather than a HACK.


  254. 254
    Steve Expat says:

    jgm, unfortunately Cameron won’t be allowed a week of uninterrupted TV coverage, due to rules on impartiality from the day the election is called. The Tories would be caling Brown’s bluff big time if they scheduled something for the end of April on the assumtion that he would bottle it.

    I think the smart money now has to be on March 25th for the election, or possibly April 8th – will avoid having to present a Budget, the surely negative Q1 growth figures and seasonal unemployment as the sales finish and the retailers dump the thousands of Christmas temps back on the street

    But this is dithering Brown we are talking about, maybe Parliament will just ‘expire’ on May 10 for an election on Friday June 4th, the last possible moment…

  255. 255
  256. 256
    AC1 says:

    I disagree.


    In order for the arrest to be lawful, the following two conditions must also be satisfied:

    * It appears to the person making the arrest that it is not reasonably practicable for a constable to make the arrest instead
    * The arrestor has reasonable grounds for believing that the arrest is necessary to prevent one of the following:
    o The person causing physical injury to himself or others
    o The person suffering physical injury
    o The person causing loss of or damage to property
    o The person absconding before a constable can assume responsibility for him

  257. 257
    christy says:

    To217,Bliar will smarm and lie his way through the whole charade.
    He is nothing but a self serving on the make pillock driven by a greedy grasping wife.One thing springs to mind though,George Orwell,real name George Arthur Blair,the man must have been a mystic,seems like years ago he figured out that a Bliar would be the chief pig in f—–g the country up and he changed his name.
    Bliar goes around denying any kind responsibility for his actions not only on Iraq but on the total mess that him and the other scottish arsehole have landed this country in.
    With Bliar it’s a strange irony that this warmongering Bush’s puppet is now a peace envoy FFS who the hell dreamt that one up.
    A job like that I would have thought would be given to someone who would be acceptable to the various parties as an honest broker,Bliar on the other hand is hated and of course can only be part time due to his speaking cash duties and the various companies that come under his banner.
    In essence a thoroughly disreputable,greedy scheming self serving example of what NOT to be as a role model.
    But never mind Bliar all is forgiven since you converted you have seen the light and are a changed man,the pope has absolved you,and I have just seen Karl Marx walk through my lounge.

  258. 258
    jgm2 says:

    It’ll be like that on June 3rd too. Or whatever day he calls the election. It’ll be like that scene from ‘The Man with Two Brains’.

    Oh Lord – is there any reason I shouldn’t call an election on (say) June 3rd [Instantaneous localised torrential rain, lightning strikes and gales] Any reason at all Lord? [Lightning strikes car and melts tyres, sparks fly every where] Just give me a sign Lord [Hailstones the size of golfballs hop off his head] Anything. Anything at all….

    I think it is fair to say that God has given us the heads up with Brown.

    He’s not the messiah. He’s an incompetent, mendacious jackass.

  259. 259
    jgm2 says:

    They’re all down in Fort-de-France in Martinique hammering the arse off the local whores. Or they were last time I was there.

  260. 260
    jgm2 says:

    I know they won’t be allowed uninterrupted coverage once the election is called. That’s why Cameron should organise a weeks free coverage before the election is called. Or precipitate an election as Brown tries to out-manouvre him.

    But that’s my whole point. At the moment Brown holds all the cards on election timing. But Cameron can actually force his hand. He just has to float the idea of a pre-election party conference and Brown will be more or less forced to call an election just to wipe a weeks uninterrupted positive coverage off our screens.

  261. 261
    AC1 says:

    Hehe, I thought it might have been a Monty Python reference…

  262. 262
    Steve Expat says:

    But remember this is still Brown we’re talking about.

    The man just can’t make a decision on anything, let alone name the date for his own demise one day earlier than the law requires him to…

    Good idea for DC tho’

  263. 263
    Gazza says:

    How else can you expect to get six bellies?

  264. 264
    Justice Fingers says:

    Oh I see. It’s ‘I Spy MP’. I kept reading it as ‘Eyes Pimp’

  265. 265
    revolting peasant says:

    I think he’ll go earlier than expected now the economy is storming into recovery, unemployment is plummeting and Brown is bringing peace to Northern Ireland…
    Labour is so divorced from reality they think we all believe this crap and they’ll opt for an earlier date before the shit really hits the fan.

  266. 266
    Gazza says:

    Good job you were not in Tesco with Phil Woollas

  267. 267
    Steve Expat says:

    Oh dear.

    “It was the right thing to do”
    “The baby-eating Tories will threaten everything by cutting spending”
    “Of course the AAA isn’t under threat”
    “We will wait until the recovery is properly under way before making £20-25bn reductions in spending” – is this new’??

    Same shit, different day…

    I hope DC now goes in for the kill at PMQs tomorrow – assuming Broon can be arsed to fly back from the shield of Belfast, of course.

  268. 268
    My Other Cars Not A Prius Either! says:

    You simply cannot say that about our prime minister,its far too tame,have two bottles of bucky and apply yourself!

  269. 269
    revolting peasant says:

    Wouldn’t hold your breath waiting for DC to go in for the kill. My 98 year old granny could do a far better job.

  270. 270
    Imbecile down a bottomless pit says:

    I can see the green shoots of recovery from here.
    Look Ma! I’m on top of the world.

  271. 271
    jgm2 says:

    I know it’s Brown. That’s the beauty of my plan. The election will be on the last day possible. Even Brown doesn’t know it yet because he still believes – in his fucked up head – that he’s a decisive leader of men – that he holds the date of the election in the palm of his hand – a trivial decision to be taken when the time is ‘right’. Except we all know, that for him the time will never be ‘right’. The time was right in October 2007. Best chance he was ever going to get. And a single speech by Cameron had him bottling it.

    So Dave could quite confidently book (say) the O2 Arena for a week in April. Full week of rah-rah-rah for the troops with 24/7 coverage. Bright lights, bright colours, photogenic accolytes in the front row. All this followed by the news that – oh, fuck me – we’re still in recession and then the following week Brown has to call an election. Cameron has a two week free run of good news from the Tories and shit news from (Labours) economy.

    I tell you – it’s a fucking brilliant idea. Even if I do say so myself. Which I do.

  272. 272
    Gordon Brown's duff eye says:

    hows this for a solution? Stop making babies you cant feed.

    Malthus had it right, starvation, disease or war. Take your pick.

  273. 273
    Tommy Cooper says:

    QE. Economy.
    Economy. QE.
    I went to the doctors the other day. I said, “Doc, I keep thinking i’m the Prime Minister”. He said “Take these pills and PMQ’s once a week”.

  274. 274
    The Admiral says:


    What a lady. I may have to have some impure thoughts over the coming days re.Liz. She came over so well, she must run on pure adenaline.

    Boy did she have her “day in court”!

  275. 275
    The Admiral says:

    Me too. Says too much…

  276. 276
    Numbers says:

    They’re not really interested in whether you believe this crap. In fact,they know you don’t. But there are millions more out there that do. Guido and other bloggers have very impressive viewer statistics,but even the Daily Mirror has more readers.

  277. 277
    Moley says:

    I forgot.
    Labour will be relying on the Met office for a reliable forecast for polling day.

    But they won’t get it because the Met office computer is full of corrupt global warming data.

    The Met office forecast will be calamitously wrong, and Brown, in large part, will be responsible for it himself. PhDs in Scottish Socialism do not qualify one as an expert in climatology.

  278. 278
    Steve Expat says:

    Bloody hell – Broon staying in Belfast again tonight.

    Will he make PMQs tomorrow to gloat about the 0.1% growth?

  279. 279
    revolting peasant says:

    Surely Mirror readers just look at the pictures?

  280. 280
    jgm2 says:

    Of course the ‘AAA’ isn’t under threat?

    What a fucking liar. Every ratings agency on the planet PLUS the IMF have said that they’re waiting for an adult to come up with a coherent debt reduction strategy but they’ll wait till after the election.

    Ie the present debt reduction strategy doesn’t cut it.

    Of course our AAA rating is under stress. We’ve just borrowed 300 billion quid to buy 300 million quid of ‘growth’. Brown borrows 500 million quid a fucking day. We borrowed 300bn quid to get 15 hours of ‘growth’.

    It’s fucked. Darlings a lawyer. The only maths he can do is fill out an expenses form fopr another flipped aprtment. Browns a history teacher. He’s no good at maths. Jack Straw is self-confessed as being shit at maths ….

    And this is our government. Of course our AAA is under threat. They should have pulled it back in 1997 with a bunch of CVs like that.

  281. 281
    Happyness Stan says:


    Someone certainly killed him, but it was not Blair, Brown, Campbell or any one else you could name, or ever will be able to name. Very likely that none of these people gave permission for such a deed, or indeed knew anything about it. These sort of things just are not done that sort of way. I doubt very much indeed that any one you could name had the slightest idea this was going to happen. Chances are they TB and all, shit their pants when hearing about said event, almost as much as Kelly clearly was doing a few days before he met his assassins and then maker.

    Perhaps you have not been reading enough James Bond books. It is all there in black and white?

    You see the whole point of secret services is that they are indeed secret.

    A licence to kill, and all that stuff. These people do not work for elected governments, and they sure as hell only work for the British people by accident. It may not have even been emeyesix at all. It could have been The kaygeebee, mossarrrd, ceeeyiah, because they all ultimately work for the same people, and have a well established habit of doing each others most dirtiest of work.

    Oh I see, you thought that James Bond Books were wholly fictional. Well you see the story is much the same in principal, only the names had to be been changed to protect the murderously guilty.

  282. 282
    jgm2 says:

    Or economics. Or economic history. OR, paradoxically, history. Because if he had any sense of history he wouldn’t have repeated the Tories housing boom and bust of the late 1980’s. Only on a much bigger scale.

  283. 283
    Steve Expat says:

    Go on then, I admit – it’s a fucking brilliant idea :-)

  284. 284
    Goodbye cruel world says:

    As a nation we deserve the government we elect. Three times.

  285. 285
    Beardy-Bill says:

    this has got to be worth a tenner:


  286. 286
    jgm2 says:

    I do hope not. Then we get to see Hague getting stuck in.

  287. 287
    Peed Skills says:

    A handful of “Billy Whizz’s” and he’ll sprint back to Westminster.

  288. 288
    AC1 says:

    Even the women?

  289. 289
    jgm2 says:

    It’s true. We deserve everything we’re about to get.

  290. 290
    Numbers says:

    Only the clever ones. The rest just carry a folded copy for the perceived status.

  291. 291
    Steve Expat says:

    jgm, fingers crossed we’re about to get a change of government.

    And boy, do we deserve that!!

  292. 292
    Steve Expat says:

    Not a bad thought.

    Hague against Hattie “I just got my equality bill thrown out by the Lords” Harperson

  293. 293
    Those who fail to learn from history.... says:


  294. 294
    Labour Munters says:

    Who is that fat bitch on Sky’s paper review? She’s like Dianne Abbott’s white soul sister.

  295. 295
    Every Major Dude Darling says:

    Every major country, every major country,Every major country, every major country,Every major country, every major country,Every major country, every major country,Every major country, every major country,Every major country, every major country,Every major country, every major country,Every major country, every major country,zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!

  296. 296
    jgm2 says:

    I see your point. But it’s safe. Cameron is not Welsh. Or bald (?). Or likely to fall into the sea while walking.

    And Brown isn’t Major. Brown isn’t even Kinnock.

  297. 297
    "During the war" says:

    Brown is currently in possession of the remarkable ability of making even Kinnock look electable,which would be jaw droppingly amazing enough,but when you add in the failure of Cameron to display any killer instinct leaves the spin doctors of both sides with a major headache.
    2010 politics. Dontcha just love it.

  298. 298
    Mr Ned says:

    This is not a sign of broken Britain. It is working exactly as designed by the Marxist ‘Common Purpose’. They must create the chaos out of which their graduates can become the leaders of he post democratic age and create their new order.

    Watch Brian Gerrish’s video presentations on bbc5.tv and be afraid, be very afraid!

  299. 299
    "During the war" says:

    To Blair,Brown,Straw,Campbell and Goldsmith,the old adage of be nice to those you meet on the way up because you meet them on the way down,may i say, warms the cockles of the British heart on a cold winter’s night.

  300. 300
    Mr Ned says:

    Indeed happyness. I understood that Iraqi guns for hire hit him funded by French intelligence services. Blair knew it was likely to happen, the rest of the cabinet were clueless about it.

  301. 301
    Boys from the black stuff says:

    Working then, jgm2?

  302. 302
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    mmmm non answer on triple A credit rating was a bit worrying and “in my judgement” appeared again .

    funny how ruin was erm somewhere else when the good news of 0.1% broke .never even went on telly ! It was nae me .

    Justin greenings quest on business tax rates is a taster of the heartache yet to come

  303. 303
    Mercian says:

    I made the mistake of looking at that eye spy thing. It has reminded me why I ignore a lot of modern technology. What a load of trivial drivel. It is a fad that will pass within 6 months in my opinion.

  304. 304
    Egg and Cheese says:

    You’ll have heartache if you don’t empty my bin. Have you finished that case of special brew i gave you as a xmas tip?

  305. 305
    Just saying says:

    RMG; We are still in Biblical times, I witnessed this in Apapa, Lagos in the 1970’s

  306. 306
    Shame says:

    So you’re Tony Blair
    What’s that mean to you Chilcot?
    I’ve heard about you
    What have you heard Chilcot?
    I’ve heard that you’re a low down lying warmonger
    Prove it

  307. 307
    pigs in space says:

    here’s a killer quote, up there with Ed ‘so what?’ testicles

    Ken: … we have the biggest, fastest rising debt

    mandybum: who cares?

    I guess Lord Rio in the the Country of Brazil and Marrakesh in the country of Morocco doesn’t

  308. 308

    Go for a pint at 4.36pm? Blimey! Some people have all the luck!

  309. 309
    caesars wife (doing a spot of freelance rubbutal) says:

    Empty your bin ? Dont drink very much these days havent done for years, besides I drank enough in my youth , all appears well and good from where I sit , the ruin is parading around in his birthday suite , darlings eyebrows are getting scorched , harriets single handedly upset every person with any common sense , jack straw or tony blair could face trial in certain countries, sociailst hypocracy uncovered .

    I suppose we could do without the debt and unbalaced economy, but I would call that a result by most measures.

    funny fabiansolutions posts have been removed from telegraph !

  310. 310
    Beatsy says:

    Boadicea reborn! I am tumescent with admiration.

  311. 311
    Fubar Brown says:

    Factoid that will be dis information in the afternoon , not left but right but who pulls the strings

  312. 312
    The big D says:

    James Cagney did that line in 1949. We won’t be able to give you quite such a spectacular send off, oil was much cheaper then.

  313. 313
    BillyBob ... reduce crime, national debt and carbon footprint, stop immigration? Every little helps! says:

    Looks like they are finally acknowledging what has been covered up…..


    Prison is a final resort, usually after numerous offences and lesser ‘punishments’

  314. 314
    BillyBob ... reduce crime, national debt and carbon footprint, stop immigration? Every little helps! says:


  315. 315
    OH is still asleep! says:

    “Old Holborn says:
    January 26, 2010 at 7:33 pm
    Mandy versus Clark on C4

    Pure cage fighting”

    Both Bilderberger whores you moron, both bat for the same NWO/EU team.

    Selling us out to their corporate banking buddies is what they do.

  316. 316
    Down with Brown! says:

    Gordon’s remaining in Belfast and missing PMQs. He is running scared of Cameron and knows he would get smashed for 0.1% growth. So he is putting up Harperson to get shot down by Hague.

    Cue Laboids spinning that Brown is essential to a deal in Northern Ireland and he’s getting on with the job. But surely he could have delegated the task to his Northern Ireland secretary. But his NI secretary is too busy buggering his butler.

  317. 317
    Down with Brown! says:

    Gordon’s “too busy” to allow himself to be held account before parliament for UK PLC’s delayed and painfully slow exit from the “great recession.” Brown has no respect from the British electorate, so we should have no respect for him.

  318. 318
    Down with Brown! says:

    NuLabour’s legacy? Rich-Poor divide wider than 40 years ago.


  319. 319

    Listening to BBC Radio 2 news just now I am reliably informed that Labour have done well to narrow the ethnic minority and women/men pay gap, plus the rich/poor divide was all much worse under the Tories.

  320. 320
    Mr Ned says:

    Just been announced on BBC Breakfast, Brown staying in Ireland and will miss PMQs.

    Surprise surprise surprise.


  321. 321
    The Ministry of Truth says:

    New day new spin

  322. 322
    albacore says:

    “The Ministry of Justice is aware of 1,512 offences committed by offenders during their period of early release. This includes three murders.”
    Three people dead because government considered them expendable; or rather because it gave no consideration whatsoever to their existence.
    The wet seaweed brigade’s fabulous supercomputer could have predicted this outcome with 100% certainty. Shame it’s too busy fantasising about man-made global warming.
    Such totalitarian callousness exceeds by a marxist mile the plotted and bungled assassination of an inconvenient David Kelly. At least he was recognised as an individual.

  323. 323
    Tapestry says:

    Not much coverage of Fraser Nelson being slung out of the Lobby.


  324. 324
    The Ministry of Truth says:

    Look he’s saved the global economy,the global banking system and steered the country into recovery after the longest recession in living memory(which started in America of course).So Rejoice ! Rejoice ! Once again Gordon Brown has saved the nation. Now he is turning his vast talents to saving the Irish – It is THE right thing to do !

  325. 325
    Chuckey Chuckey Egg says:

    Nu labour don’t appear to be goo at doing anything other than hosing money down the drain

    The only thing keeping our economy stable is the hope of a new government within a few months

    Is it not time Labour should do what they do best and shout from the opposition bench

    Labour is the party of freeloaders and the deluded

  326. 326
    The Fly on the Wall says:

    Tony “What did you put it writing for ?”

    Peter “Er er er sorry”

    Ally ” For God’s Sake Peter get on side. We’re trying to wage a fucking war here you know !”

    Jack: ” Bloody typical of lawyers !”

    Gordon: “Sorry I’m late. Did I miss anything ?”

  327. 327
    Lil Olmey says:

    Here’s another example of the sort of twisted ‘thinking’ that defines Nu Labour :


    In other words, there are loonies out there who think that a fundamental inability to do a given job is not a reason not to get the job. The Prime Mentalist springs to mind, for some reason.

  328. 328
    Gordon Brown says:

    In order to prevent David Cameron being humiliated I shall not be taking PMQ’s this afternoon.

    Cameron will have to crack his gags next week

    Good Morning

  329. 329
    The Admiral says:

    Or Mellissa…


    Bet she loves Guido really…

  330. 330
    The Admiral says:

    The headline had me choking on my Weetabix!!!!,,,…

  331. 331
    The Admiral says:

    Now having read the whole text all I can say is,

    “You couldn’t make it up”.


  332. 332
    Sir Mortimer says:

    ‘Boudicca’ to those who knew her.

  333. 333
    Mr Plum says:

    I wonder would it have been OK if she had advertised for an unreliable slacker.

    Might have got a few redundant labour MP’s applying.

  334. 334
    Moley says:

    Why does Brown bother having Ministers?

    He runs everywhere shoving his Ministers out of the way, snatching problems out of their hands, and completely fucking them up himself.

  335. 335
    Sir Everard Digby says:

    But they are not keeping the economy stable. They have just lit a longer fuse to the explosive charge and added more explosives,whilst claiming they have defused the bomb.

    To make things safer, their solution is to add more explosives whilst the fuse continues to burn.

    That supposedly intelligent people support this scenario is staggering.

    Who would give credence to anything these nutters say or do?

  336. 336
    Moley says:

    If Brown is bottling PMQs; what excuse will he have for being busy during the election?

  337. 337
    Unsworth says:

    The ‘Ministry of Justice’ is ‘aware of’ fuck all.

  338. 338
    Nigel Tufnell says:

    What’s wrong with being sexy?

  339. 339

    …blow it’s bloody head off!

  340. 340
    Henry Crun says:

    At least Straw the Spliff’s dad now has now war experience than his granddad.

  341. 341

    […] it tweets about sightings of MPs and what they are doing… Hat Tip to Guido Fawkes…who states “Guido hears that some MPs are up in arms about invasion of their privacy […]

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