Parliament Spy is Now EyeSpy.MP
Guido was a bit late to the Parliament Spy twitter phenomenon, which sadly disappeared after James Kirkup of the Telegraph scared them off. It is back in a new web 2.0 way, crowd sourcing gossip from parliamentary staffers.
The creators tell Guido it is more secure and anonymous in this version. Email your MP sightings to tweet@EyeSpy.MP and the subject line will be tweeted out. So far today we know who Lembit was chatting-up last night and that Nick Herbert is currently lunching a pretty boy. Early days yet…
We’re all in it together.
We’re all dimwits together.
Ohhhhh matron!!!
Up the Hammers!! lol lol
naughty labour!! :0
i’m mates with campbell claret
everyone who disagrees with me is stupid!!!! lol lol lol omg lol
I spotted George Osborne getting shouted at by Andy Coulson for some reason
A freak just like me
tit
pack it in cripples
you are a thief.
and a dimwitted one at that: I do not use my full pseudonym during the day.
DOH!
woof woof
Has Griffin got Parkinson’s? He keeps twitching.
GO GET’EM NICK!
Either that or he’s got a late stage addiction to methamphetamine, like his beloved Hitler.
When they tweeted that, Nick Herbert was speaking in the Commons.
We’re all at it together.
we’re all at it together
It’s the right thing to do: you Taxpayers still paying for my Sky TV bills, aren’t ya ?
Spotted at 12.30pm – Caroline Flint having coffee with a fat man in Portcullis House
Wow riveting stuff.
Caroline is all froth
And slightly unclean, look of a city girl
Pikey surely?
Lucky white heather sir!
and grimy skin
offer her a facial?
She’s out of westminster this time and she knows it. The troughing cow.
I’d stlll like to froth the fuck out of her. Or is that fuck the froth? Anyway, bet she sucks like a dyson. Dirty bitch.
Fat man? Not G. Brown, then?
Prescott is now pie spy.
Didn’t the Barclaygraph end up covered in ordure with this autotweeting malarkey last summer?
Hope so, Barclaygraph is awful these days. Heffer is a turdsplat on a slumtown Mumbai bog and The Speccie is rapidly going down the feckin shitter. Frasier Crane is a numpty.
Official.
Back under the bridge tory troll.
And hello to you tat you horse’s handbreak. Back from the dead.
Naaaaa Heffer is a walking corpse. Best send the rubber faced piss guzzler back to whichever long gone decade he belongs to.
10 minutes & no comments – has Guido dropped out of favour today?
Buggar!
I’ll bugger you
I’M FIRST !!
FIRST Secretary, right ??
Is that what you sometimes have to wipe off your shoes?
A good facility for Staffers who are normaly treated like fixtures and fittings by the MPs to get some payback.
Eyes Pymp ???
Is this some kind of sourcing service for ye ancient procurer of ladies of the night ????
Very good, MLC!
Labour MPs vote themselves even longer holidays in February !
http://www.iaindale.blogspot.com/
Lucky we’re not in a crisis then.
Too bad that they didn’t vote themselves 365 days holiday a year way back in 1997.
Sure, paying them 400 million quid a year for doing fuck all would be a bit galling but paying ‘em 400 million quid to completely fuck up the UK is far more galling.
On balance I’d prefer we paid them to stay at home with their SKY subscriptions, eating their 400 quid a month unexpensed groceries and paying their wages. Far cheaper and far better national outcome.
Some people seem to think that MPs are just sitting around on their arses all day wasting vast sums of public money.
This is not true.
It takes an extraordinary amount of effort to waste £700 billion.
I’m knackered.
I don’t doubt it for a moment Bill. Only a tireless, dedicated, single-minded pursuit of pure idiocy could waste that kind of money with less than fuck all to show for it.
Uniquely in time and space we seem to have located just such an idiot and elevated him to the position of maximum damage.
Step forward Gordon Brown. The Supreme Imbecile. Destroyer of Economies. Ruiner of Nations. Jackass de tutti Jackass.
Imbeciles Uber Alles.
Reminds me of the film Brewsters Millions, if they have a remake they could base it on Gordon, Gordon Brewster blow 700 Billion in one year and get even with England.
They’ll be on permanent holiday come the election
the Lazy fuckers they dont do fuck all as it is
everything is done in Brussels !
You mean “they do fuck all these days” I presume
Dale thinks he’s David Dimbleby:
http://www.totalpolitics.com/blogs/index.php/2010/01/21/tickets-available-election-question-time
If iot was chaired by Bumblebee I might go, but it aint worth it to see Dale stroke his vanity.
Squandered another 500,000,000 quid today
You were spotted at an RBS cashpoint trying to withdraw ANOTHER £ 500,000,000 for tomorrow as well.
RBS are fresh out of taxpayers cash having lent Kraft 11bn quid to buy Cadburys.
So now the taxpayer will be underwriting the insurance to underwrite the loan to buy the company that will fire the entire UK workforce and rehire a punch of Poles in Poland.
And on top of all that we’ll be printing the money to buy the bonds so that RBS can claim that the bonds it already holds are worth something because look the government was able to issue bonds into the ‘market’. These bonds are good! We’re not ins*lvent and neither is the entire UK!!
An excellent synopsis and precis. I just wish that it wasn’t true.
Un-fucking unbelieveable!
Bastards I hate them all. Labour for doing it, and the Tories and Lob Dums for not stopping them.
If the pound were stronger it would be harder to purchase UK assets…
It doesn’t matter how strong or weak the pound is if you can lend the money from a bank that is essentially ban**upt anyway. What are they going to do once you’ve spirited all the machinery and manufacturing overseas and sold off the grounds for housing?
The UK government (via the banks) has already written off billions on dodgy loans to Russians buying non-existent assets.
This is a one-way bet for Kraft. At any price.
Heads we win – tails you lose.
If it was anyone but Calamity Clegg asking that RBS question then I think Brown would have been skewered at PMQ’s. But fair play to him for at least putting him on the ropes. ’bout time Davey stuck on his best pair of hob nailed boots and started giving Gord a right good shoeing.
Lembit Opik spotted ram-raiding a Lidl on a shopmobility scooter wearing a fez
Sion Simon spotted helping an old lady across the road while picking up litter and ticking off two oiks for using bad language.
Mark Oaten has just seen a dog having a dump and found the experience strangely stimulating.
You really are unable to milk that meme anymore. How about some therapy, or just STFU.
Good afternoon Mr Oaten.
John Prescott spotted furtively entering a building in Soho advertising……Remedial English classes.
Not a sex clinic then?
Or even a Pie Shop?
Tiger Woods spotted in a sex clinic after offering tips to Barry Obama.
Are the remedial english classes taken by a young lady with a Moldavian accent with the refreshments mainly being a champagne label glued over some Lambrini at £160 a bottle?
If so then it wasn’t Gordon Brown you saw.
……He goes to the young man’s classes…….
That’s a bit more like it – tittle-tattle, rumours and gossip of catamites on the public purse in Sodom and Gomorrah.
Anyone else see that as “Eyes Pimp”?
Dunno what that says about me……
Lembit here.
As the ungrateful voters of Montgomeryshire seem likely to evict me from my sinecure, any ideas on how I can gross(=net) around £175K pa for doing fuck all. I am also likely to lose my Daily Sport column and £50k pa.
If Ali Campbell reads this, I can turn my hand to soft porn so perhaps we can knock out a few titillating political thrillers with significant sex content. I know quite a lot about the subject. And btw how is it that I pull the nice birds and ole Chipolata Prescott must settle for scrubbers?
Wayhayhay.
The human anagram.
Limp to bike?
I bike lot MP?
Bottom pickle…Well, not quite.
I like bot MP?
Or is that Mandelson.
Ooops. Sorry, forgot. Mandelson’s not an MP.
Nick Brown then.
Lembit Opik MP = Lob Me Pimp Kit
O, bit like PM
Pimp like bot’m…
OK, so I had to add the poetic apostrophe, but it kind of works!
Lembit here.
Thats enough ana(L)grams.
I am strictly a front bottom man myself.
You are confusing me another Lib MP who will lose his seat, Mark Oaten
“Apostrophe’s permitted,” as my sister Agnes used to say.
LimpDick NosePick
slantgobtwatface
It suffers from what Scottish MPs would call the Disney Syndrome..
It Disney bloody work…
Why are the small doings of pygmies interesting, exactly?
Quite so Sir W W.
Feeling better Mr Anus?
Human equivalent of combing for lice. Evolution developed the most banal into hairdressers until one of them invented Twitter and so it begins again.
Looks like a great source of information for shit nobody cares about.
Good description . Could apply it to http://www.harrietharman.org/
Naaah. It’ll keep the paranoid fuckers looking over their shoulder.
See how they like the surveillance society they created.
Bastards.
(applause)
Excellent – keep the enemy occupied on worthless things – like getting the Nazi’s to send three divisions to Norway – who the hell was going to cross the North Sea in thousands of boats?
Which brings me neatly to Arromanches and a certain Moron Brown – the only (unelected) PM to be booed by his own war veterans……
Near to Obama Beach wasn’t it?
Beach Balls
They are really going to regret snooping on us. They have far more to lose, and technology is on our side. They would have to close the National Grid to stop us now.
Fuck ‘em.
The Plod have far too much to do, controlling feral Yoof. The Parlaimentarians have had this coming to them for so long.
Sarah Brown might find going to Kent to get some Lapsong a bit more inconvenient.
‘I never go to Kent’
tweet,tweet
I believe you. You’re too busy making ‘British’ roasts.
Michael Fabricant spotted drilling a hole in a dyke somewhere in Lichfield
I’m surprised a dyke let a bloke anywhere near her.
You’ve never seen the dykes in Lichfield then. Very scary and not exactly fussy either.
If it helps make them feel less secure and untouchable I’m interested. If it causes the little creeps to become paranoid – always looking over their shoulders – even better. Nothing to hide, nothing to fear. I like it a lot.
Wasn’t it this Government that launched a campaign encouraging citizens to snoop on each other unde the pretence of terrorism prevention?
My my, aren’t their nasty control-freakery ideas starting to bite them hard on the arse now.
Not content with Laptops 4 chavs Gordon is now starting a £2.6 million chav support fund, to be financed by the next Parliament.
http://www.number10.gov.uk/
Great ! Labour create this huge underclass as social mobility has gone into reverse since 1997 so he waits till the Nation is on the verge of bankruptcy and then tosses them a few cream buns. Just before a General Election too.
Haven’t these problem families suffered enough without Brown’s intervention?
Good job that we have plenty of money, and no debt. Otherwise this would be really concerning. There is no stopping this fucker spending money, is there?
“If it costs nothing, it’s worth nothing!” Old Yorkshire Saying.
The scum will not be arsed at all. You could triple their allowances and benefits and they would still piss it away. Because they are uneducated pond life.
On our local commercial radio stations there is a Government advert every 10 minutes on each ad break, trying to recruit even more Social Workers from the local population.
So please tell me what difference these wet wipes will make to the productivity of our once great economy. In fact 4/5ths of the adverts are Central Government departments, Local Councils, Quangos, NHS Trusts etc. ALL paid for by the public purse.
WHY do we need them?
Would make a good caption competition;
Gordon the Moron says;
“Now then little Jonny,what should I write to this bereaved mother and go slowly as I cannot see,cannot write and cannot spell”
£2.6m = 400,000 bottles of Buckfast.
We are all in it together now, the midden.
I’ll say! Where can I get some?
you are not the real Mark and I claim my £5
It is manure free!
“I won’t allow any bodily fluids in my garden”
Silly bint, the best thing to add to compost is piss. She knows fuck all about about gardening.
(my gardener told me to type that, the turnips are doing really well, so he must know what he’s talking about)
Has she told the birds?
It did sound like any bodily fluids stuff was a no, no,…… Snail poo, ugh!
She sounds to be the type that gardens in Marigolds. Can’t have that filthy soil getting under her nicely-manicured fingernails. Ugh – might have microbes in it.
Spotted — Glenys Kinnock in the House of Lords, with Peter Mandelson’s hand up HER arse …
I suppose it makes a change to be ‘doing the fisting’…
tweeters: NICK BROWN IS WATCHING and following YOU.
So is Randy Andy Coulson
..that would be waddling after , he must have to do a Boy George and chain his rent boys up, otherwise he’d never catch up with them.
If I ever see my MP in his constituency it will be a fucking miracle and I will be sure to report it.
The Honourable Members will not like this one bit – expect people tweeting the whereabouts of MPs to be detained under the Prevention of Terrorism Act or similar.
Yes
And it you ever see an MP with his wife !!
Seems to be a dying breed…
Must be eugenics…
My MP is such a loafer,he didn’t even get in to the Commons yesterday to vote for an extra holiday!
Must have been playing with his 3 garlic pressers.
LOL
This weekend The Conservative Party are holding a wank-o-thon to raise money for the Party, and they are asking those owed money if they are willing to wipe the slate clean.
Hopefully there will be lots of contributors keen to splash out, spend their wad, etc..
Fill a bucket – win a pound
I’ll “Come” along with a “Full Sack” and give out “Large Portions” So everyone can have a”Pearl necklace” i hope my” Load” will Help you with your Erection
Almost down to the standard of a Carry On film.
Did you know that Ed Balls has two plonkers? It stands to reason he couldn;t get that stupid playing with just one.
first comment
That made any sense, or was moderately intelligent.
do not steal.
one of the ten commandments innit.
Bit rich bringing a rent boy into Westminster Palace and entertaining the bitch at taxpayers expense.
Herbert needs to under his cojones are exposed, not only to ridicule but a damn fine shoeing.
Cnut
spastic, cripple, troll Nick Herbet is getting his cock sucked at tax payers expense.
You forgot ‘innit’.
Oh dear tat you have reached your three comment limit.
What a shame, well au revoir until the next thread old boy
So much time and for such little effective, or interesting contribution.
Bless.
TaT your post quota is used up.
innit.
cripple.
Sorry! My tat tribute group need a bit more practice before they’re ready to headline Glasto.
Louie ! At least mine are all still alive!
You’ve only got one comment left tat use it wisely.
Do tell us who Lembit was chatting up ? Boy or girl ?!
An inbetweeny
Lembit here.
Stop this calumny categorising me as a bottom fisher. I only do front bottoms FFS.
Gizza job. Voters are turfing me out because they are jealous of my ability to attract Top Totty. Wankers.
It’s the wonky chin what does it for the ladies.
Fantastic quim stim during ye olde soixante-neuf.
Better to have a big nob though.
Disgusting…
My work here is done.
O/t yesterday The lying Fucker McBust said that unemployment had dropped by 7000
then later at pmq’s said Lie-Bore were reducing unemployment by 300,000 per month
First Mc Fuckwitt The 7000 figure was for Sep/Oct/Nov period which is when employers take on temp staff for christmas which compared to other years is minimal
And if as you state you lying Turd
you are removing 300,000 off benefits every month
then in “Real Terms” there will be NO unemployment within 6 months !
Well Done You Fucking Idiot on those figures
we must be in the biggest economic recovery in the history of the world !
our industry must be crying out for people to work for them !
What a fucking Dreamer .
And this is how Brown works. Lie in a headline. By the time the 20% suss the lie, the remaining 80% only remember the headline.
Standard policy for the last 13 years unfortunately.
And successful too. 25 – 30% of the voters are still blissfully unaware of the economic clusterfuck that is all around them.
Why would they ever be aware?
They cannot read,spell,speak or string a sentence together that is longer than 5 words which consist of;
“Where is my benefits mate?”
Come to think of it,isn’t there a man from Scotland who cannot do any of those things and was famously encouraging people to milk the benefits system when they were a student,now what’s his name?
The Coward Jack Straw Is Lying His Arse Off at The Iraq Enquiry !
What i find strange is he is laughing all the way through it
is this nerves?
Is this because he is lying ?
or is it because he already knows all the questions
and has prepared all the answers ?
He’s laughing because he’s not the one under fire in the St*n.
Yeah. Tough dilemma Jack. Shall I stand up to this fucking lunatic Blair and Bush and say good-bye to the best paying gig I’ll ever get or shall I just keep my gob shut and keep taking the cheques.
Hmmmm. A Damascene conversion for Straw then. Along with the entire cabinet of the time [with a somewhat bizarrely honourable exception to Robin Cook]. Farewell then lofty idealist student, hello venal self-centred jackass.
Does this suit/skirt make my lies look big?
Having to love the rogue elements of the Mus’lim population of his constituency. Must really grate. He really isn’t a faithful follower of the one true faith. The ‘chosen ones’.
The fucking snake is lying and trying desperately to cover his own arse.
To Gordon McBust.
Yeah,I see that Strawman the arsehole is up to his usual mealy mouthed trickery.
The arsehole brings a new meaning to the word backbone,his sprog Willy Wanker though thinks he made the biggest mistake of his life.
Blackburns other community might be upset though.
Straw really does have this demeanour that makes you want to tie him to the front of a train and drive it across Siberia in the coldest possible weather.
That would be the warm up act.
Then it would be a case of leaving him with a village full of Cossack women to slowly pull him apart pore by pore.
It’s because he knows that as he sits there,he has his fraudulently gained cash stashed away ready for his retirement – I cannot make the statement I would like to make because the Press would prosecute me,but it rhymes with a kind of tree that lasts longer than most.
He is lying. He doesn’t have to tell truth. No risk of perjury here.
No oath, no truth, nothing done to stop this shit happening again.
See Nadine Dorris is on the blower to Carter-Fuck, oh what a wonderful democracy we live in.
mad as a box of frogs that one
Anyone given any thought to EYESPYMEP.Could be interesting don’t you think?
Important that the airport as well as parliament is covered in order to catch the “sign on” merchants.
Have a look at: Expense allowance abused by MEP’s and part two “still” abused on you tube !
Spotted – Neil Kinnock being given a good kicking by a lynch mob.
Well, I can dream, can’t I?
That was Glenys being chased by the Bunker gang.
Kinnock was the man who had a spot of bother in a toilet with a couple of men – they tried to fight him and he beat the shit out of them – blood all over the place evidently.
Must be the red hair and being Welsh.
The Tory majority will provide hilarity for the next five years
hey name stealer!
oh wait i did write that………
Have you been nicking Gordon’s sweeties again?
The fool forgot to change his name in between comments.
An old dog like me can’t be taught new tricks
woof woof
Had a walk in the cool air after awards last night – had to clear my head.Hero Hubbie tells me he still can’t sleep in the spare bedroom without having those nightmares.Feel so sorry for him.Off for my hair do and then read a bit more of The Canterbury Tales.
Met this young guy at the awards last night. Went back to his place for drinks. Ended up in bed with him and had the most fantastic sex I’ve ever had.
Dr Who, Sarah?
Straw at the Iraq Inquiry…he’s sending me to sleep
Tony Blair is innocent
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH and you’re right not to believe it, shall we move on.
Free Nelson Mandela
with every four gallons, and replacement tyres.
Gordon Brown is a misunderstood man, trying to better everyone’s lives.
Don’t believe the media lies.
I kept a straight face while typing this…..well almost.
maybe we can discuss tory party membership being down on your blog?
We are all in Russia. At sniper school. See you when we get back. Pora e t.
174
For 174
Well i’ve got a date lined up thanks to Guardian Soulmates, nothing serious just a few drinks, well wish me luck. I will tell you all how it went tomorrow.
have fun kiddies.
fuck off concrette pump you masssive tit
Has Cyclops been subjected to cosmetic surgery or has he been botoxed ?
spotted – Mark Oaten in a B&Q ‘trying’ out different glass coffee tables by lying underneath them and checking visiblity
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