December 12th, 2009

Tiger Woods / Nigel Griffiths, Naked Abuse of the Law

After the Trafigura injunction crumbled Guido canvassed the idea to interested parties that we should individually write to the major London libel law firms and say that we would not voluntarily submit to these “Whom it May Concern” injunctions thus:

Am intending to write to all the firms that send me them [super injunctions] advising that in future I will exercise my own judgement when I receive them.

If I judge it to be in the public interest I’ll forward the injunction to Wikileaks and take my chances in the Courts.

If more people told them this it would bugger up the blanket ban system. Spartacus system. They won’t know who gave it to Wikileaks…

People were genuinely positive towards the idea.  The Tiger Woods media gagging injunction which we are not even allowed to mention is now uploaded by person(s) unknown on to Wikileaks.

For good measure Schillings should note that there is also a picture of Tiger Woods partly naked and looking a complete w****r on the blog – a further breach of the “Confidential Schedule”.  Tiger Woods is not really the issue here, freedom of the press is the issue.

For example, Nigel Griffiths, an MP caught on camera with his trousers down in his office with a woman in only her stockings and suspenders, also apparently has a super injunction preventing the media from fully informing voters as to what he was up to, in the office taxpayers pay for him to work in. Enough. Guido will take his chances in the Courts.


447 Comments

  1. 1
    Shaun Woodward, That's Life dog says:

    Sausages

    Like

  2. 2
    Tachybaptus says:

    Good luck, Guido. You will need it in a world where the bad guys are in charge and make up the rules as they go along.

    Like

    • 163

      Schillings?

      Worse than Hunter Fuck

      Come and sue me, ya fuckers, if ya dare.

      Like

    • 188
      udderly 'orrible says:

      Excellent Mr Fawkes.

      Marxist sc*um masquerading as a legitimate “government” have spent Liebour”s too-many-hours in power enacting one of the most authoritarian frames of reference for rule since that of a certain infamous German warmonger.

      A record that shames “liberal” Britain.

      While you’re onto the injuncters perhaps you might also rally behind the Liverpool family of hotel keepers harassed and ruined by the grotesquely termed “hate crimers”. (see Daily Nail-em today)

      Official undermining of free speech and democratic rights is persistent and insidious, smothering a dozy public in blood-red blankets of socialist filth and furthering the agenda of desert-robed camel riders and similar extremists.

      If we don’t all stand up soon we will be Jackiebooted into submission.

      Like

    • 441
      Archie says:

      Spot on, Tachy! Having had dealings with our so-called justice system.

      Like

  3. 3
    Grumpy Old Man says:

    Brave words, Guido. I’ll cough up a fiver for your fighting fund and visit you in prison.

    Like

    • 19
      Dick the Prick says:

      Eldrick Tont???? WTF is going on in the world?

      Like

    • 46
      Boycott the Licence Fee says:

      Er, no one goes to prison for de/fam/at/ion.
      Guido, if it ever comes to the worst, insist on a jury rather than a single judge. They’ll never find against you in the current environment.

      Like

      • 197
        Bordeaux Binger says:

        Hear hear. Never underestimate the common sense of a jury. The possibility of going before one scares the crap out of the CPS when they try to enforce some of the more restrictive legislation passed by the present Stalinista government. That is why so may stupid cases are dropped when the victim refuses a Police Caution or a quick plea in Magistrates’ Courts. More power to Mr Fawkes, and to Wikileaks.

        Like

        • 397
          Anonymous says:

          Won’t be a problem for much longer if Jack Straw has his way. Juries would be a thing of the past in his vile little vision for our future.

          Like

      • 210
        angry old git says:

        It’s not defamation, it’s contempt. And yes, you can go to prison for it.

        Like

  4. 5
    Nigel Griffiths MP says:

    Oi! That was my daughter in the sussies. Can’t help how the yooff of today dress can i??! and I was reaching over for a Murray Mint. See you in court Huntflap.

    Like

  5. 6
    bunnco says:

    Guido – where’s the ‘Paypal – Donate’ button so we can all contribute to your costs?

    Like

  6. 7
    anon says:

    Bet Mrs Guido is quietly watching X factor without the faintest idea Guido has left the X box to do a bit of a dirty protest in the name of democracy.

    Like

  7. 8
    Off to anywhere but here if I could. says:

    Superb – fucking lawyers and their like are what are killing freedom in this benighted country.

    Shame a can’t post a pic here but one with two fingers stuck right up would fit the bill.

    Like

  8. 9
    Anonymous says:

    Good, a bit more sunlight is required on UK public life, this persons pubic life might be a good tool to start things rolling.

    Like

  9. 10
    Baron von Rippedoffbritain says:

    They coming for you Guido, You hear that?? they are at the door!!!

    Stand completed still. Make no movements.

    You are the dead.

    Like

  10. 14
    D 4 Dogshit says:

    if Gordon Brown organised a disco it would be really shit

    Like

  11. 15

    so should we be saying

    Go get ‘em tiger?

    Like

  12. 16
    Off to anywhere but here if I could. says:

    Who the fuck is Simon Malcolm Smith?

    Like

    • 17
      Simon Malcolm Smith says:

      Sausages

      Like

      • 18
        Off to anywhere but here if I could. says:

        Not you, the other Simon Malcolm Smith

        Like

        • 39
          Simon Malcolm Smith says:

          Walls

          Like

          • Old Holborn says:

            118, 24/7, it’s directory heaven.

            Like

          • Old Holborn says:

            I love the 118 24 7 tune I’d love to know the guys who sing it and whether they’ll release something.. anyway utube does the trick someone posting the lyrics which is fab I made a couple of changes:

            118 24 7
            give them a call it’s directory heaven,
            if you need a cab, their service is fab,
            if you fancy a curry, and it’s there in a hurry.

            118 24 7,
            send them a text it’s directory heaven,
            want a kitchen extension, a pizza or pension,
            a plumber or sparks, or a place to see sharks.

            118 24 7… it’s directory heaven!
            (lyrics for EXTENDED version!)
            Day or Night, Dawn or Dusk,
            cause the’ve got the number,
            for a roof or venter a place to learn rumba,
            Portugese or Chinese or a nice Lebonese,
            Find a restaurant to please with the greatest of ease,
            Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, give them a ring,
            Yeah, Yeah, Yeah, the finda thing,
            118 247… it’s directory heaven!

            Like

          • Who the FUCK are you?

            Like

          • Sir Gus says:

            I’m YOU bitch. Who are YOU?118 24 7, it’s directory heaven…

            Like

    • 59
      Records says:

      Simon Smith, didn’t he have an amazing dancing bear?

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simon_Smith_and_the_Amazing_Dancing_Bear

      Like

    • 171
      Anonymous says:

      Apparently a partner of Schillings, whose mobile number is now all over the internet, LOL

      Like

      • 212
        Off to anywhere but here if I could. says:

        So let’s get this straight.

        There is an ban on publishing photos of Mr Woods (that don’t exist, allegedly) which was instigated by a partner in the firm that raised the ban.

        Democracy, it’s what LieBour can’t abide.

        Like

      • 326
        Simon Smith's Wife says:

        “Apparently a partner of Schillings, whose mobile number is now all over the internet, LO”

        Please don’t send him any obnoxious texts.

        07712 183996

        Like

        • 368
          Technomist says:

          Does anyone have a photo?

          Like

        • 426
          F. OFF D. LOTTAYA. says:

          Schillings …. isn’t that the firm used by Jonathan Woss to prevent disclosures regarding him and his family?

          Like

          • Ratkins says:

            Yes and to stop pictures of him playing tennis with David Badell. Also lawyers for Roman Polanski, Alisher Usmanov, the Government of Saudi Arabia, Northern Rock….. that Icelandic bank and other luminaries like Sassou-Nguesso – and not to forget the case of Caprice and the forged letter.
            John Kelly gave an interview in FT this weekend touting for work from more bankers – just a consonant away.

            Like

  13. 21
    The Beast of Clerkenwell says:

    Tiger has got wood

    Like

  14. 22
    The naked truth says:

    Naked pictures heh, gives a new dimension to Tiger’s wood!

    Like

    • 155
      Technomist says:

      Apparently they don’t exist, which is not something one would have known unless able to read the terms of the injunction, which of course, is not something one is supposed to know exists either

      Like

      • 427
        Donald Rumsfeld says:

        As we know,
        There are known knowns.
        There are things we know we know.
        We also know
        There are known unknowns.
        That is to say
        We know there are some things
        We do not know.
        But there are also unknown unknowns,
        The ones we don’t know
        We don’t know.

        Like

  15. 24
    Gonk says:

    Guido you must be rich.
    Still, you have a svelte snake hipped lawyer
    on your side don’t you.
    And think how many visitors you’d get if it all
    goes pear shaped.

    Like

  16. 26
  17. 28
    constan treader says:

    Guido

    I salute your courage, your strength, your indefatigability, and I want you to know that we are with you, hatta al-nasr, hatta al-nasr, hatta al-Quds.

    Like

  18. 29
    My throbbing heart says:

    Excerpts from Cheetah Woods own blog title entries;

    “Playing Three In A Row”

    “Developing Endurance And Stamina”

    And a question from a fan back in 2008;

    “Do you enjoy playing so far away from home? I can imagine that, now that you have children, it’s got to be hard to be so far away from them.
    — Rupert from Houston

    “You’re exactly right, Rupert. Now, it’s very difficult to leave Elin and the children, and I’m sure it’s only going to get tougher. Once Sam and Charlie start school, it won’t be easy to take them out of class for a week-long trip. A veteran pro once told them it’s tough to leave them as babies, but once they ask you not to go, it breaks your heart. That’s something I’ll always remember. “

    Like

  19. 31
    PDM-Cockermouth says:

    Fucking brilliant Fawkes, this is why we read. What newspaper would have those kind of stones?

    Like

    • 167
      Voice of The People says:

      Please remove ones tongue-tip from Mr Guido Fawkes Esq’s bumhole. This is a FAMILY forum. Pervert.

      Like

  20. 32
    Fore! says:

    From the man’s own website;

    Tiger Tips;

    “Maintain A Quiet Head” …whoops.

    Like

  21. 33
    Anonymous says:

    Fair play to you Mr. Fawkes. In the age of the internet hopefully the UK will stop being used as a destination for libel tourists and also see the end of these gagging orders in the future, not so much due to our politicians seeing sense but the persuants seeing the futility of the action.

    Like

  22. 34
    William Blake says:

    Tiger, tiger, burning bright
    Caught with pants down
    Now in the shite

    Like

  23. 36
    2 under for the day says:

    Cant get the wiki thing to open. Has someone got to it?

    Like

    • 124
      HandsomeDavid says:

      Wikileaks has an algorithm which interrogates your emails. If you are a Global Warming Denier then you will be denied access.

      Like

  24. 37
    It's not what it looks like. says:

    This is exactly how Brown will try to stop any mention that he was totally destroyed in the forthcoming Election Death he is soon to suffer.

    He will instruct Cart Fuck etc to put a gagging order on any mention of a Tory landslide and Brown defeat.

    Oh and for good measure he will try to ban any reference to a “Brown’s Broken Britain” and that there is an economic crisis (crisis,what crisis?).

    Soon Brown,your arse is going to be OURS!

    Fucking lying bastard.

    Like

  25. 41
    I did NOT have sex with that woman,but I did with loads of others! says:

    President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.

    “What is it?” exclaims the President.

    “It’s the Abortion Bill, Mr. President – what do you want to do about it?”

    “Just go ahead and pay it.”

    Like

  26. 42
    Gonk says:

    Thank god for that, he’s gone.
    I thought for a moment I’d had
    to much to drink.

    Like

  27. 44
  28. 45
    bernard manning says:

    What’s the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa always stops after 3 ho’s

    Like

  29. 50
    Brown to fuck off soon! says:

    From The Times;

    Gordon Brown last week addressed a private “key seats” meeting, when candidates were told to have their campaign literature ready for publication by the end of next month.

    The party’s general secretary, Ray Collins, is understood to have told No 10: “We will be ready whenever you decide to go.”

    AND US TO RAY,US TOO!!!!

    Like

  30. 52
    Carry On Don't Loose Your Head (1967) says:

    Well done Guido!

    The fuckers should remember there are more bloggers than drunken judges in this country. Publish and be damned!

    Like

  31. 54
    assegai mike says:

    I pledge a minimum £50 to your fighting fund if it comes to it, and a visit in prison if it comes to it. Well done and good luck!

    Like

    • 95
      Beezley says:

      >a visit in prison

      Was what Richard Ingrams dreaded from Lord Longford and the only reason, apparently, he didn’t publish something dodgy in Private Eye.

      Like

  32. 55
    What Carter Ruck do not want you to hear says:

    Go for it.

    Only problem is, they will use their resources to shaft the little people and throw them to the wolves who apply for injunctions to make an example out of you all and throw up counter cases and polarise the vote and debate.

    Like

  33. 56
    Mr Slater's Parrot says:

    SKREEEEEEERRKK!!! (ping) TAPTAP!!! SOORRRR-TED! (flutter)

    Like

  34. 61
    TheCourtOfPublicOpinion says:

    Well look on the bright side – you got next Fridays caption competition sorted: http://www.newsoftheworld.co.uk/multimedia/archive/00031/grif_516x300_31895a.jpg

    Like

  35. 62
    Guido will be the fresh beer bum in the shower block says:

    Hey big boy you gonna pick up that soap?

    Like

  36. 64
    Brown - the colour of shit says:

    Talking of the law

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk/2009/dec/11/snapshot-special-branch-terror-suspect

    Another nail in the coffin of respect for the police.

    Brown’s Britain – fuck off you c*unt,we shall beat you.

    Like

  37. 67
    (yes I am a cunt / no I am not nu labour) says:

    Any chance of a pic of Emily No-Mates beautiful honeydews while your at it?

    Like

  38. 74
    syd says:

    Woods is a fucking N*gger. What else do you expect?

    Like

  39. 75
    hooper dooper says:

    I really do not want to see Tiger Woods brandishing his 3 wood

    Like

  40. 81
    Brown Hater says:

    I need to mention, on here today, that I DO hate Brown more than anything else that I can think of.

    Like

    • 98
      Geoff Hoon says:

      And while we’re in reminding mode, please don’t forget which part of the female anatomy I resemble in every possible way.

      Like

    • 101
      Brown Hater II says:

      But Blair wins by a short straw in the hate stakes, ’cause Blair facilitated Brown’s very existence.
      Brown would have been nothing without ‘I’m a regular guy’ St. Tony (now known as a war criminal)

      Like

  41. 82
    Boring Bland Corporation says:

    Jobs for the boys and girls tonight on the BBC, wonder how they rigged the vote for their own employee Chris to get in and how much Lily Allen pocketed for that shite tastic appearance.

    Like

  42. 85
    Tony couldn't keep his gob shut says:

    Tony Blair is a dead man walking

    Like

  43. 87
    Joseph Malik says:

    I never knew Tiger’s real name until I’d read this court order, and no, it’s not Streisand.

    Like

  44. 89
    A weese mon siad says:

    Hidden Tiger, Crotching Dragon

    Like

  45. 90
    threepence says:

    Stick it in your family…..album.

    Like

  46. 99
    A weese mon siad says:

    18 holes in a day was easey peasy for Tiger Woods.

    Like

  47. 100
    Snotty says:

    The Times reckons McDoom is going for a snap election, possibly in March as Labour is nearly bankrupt:

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article6954609.ece

    Monday wouldn’t be soon enough!

    Like

  48. 103
  49. 105
    Anonymous says:

    I dont think we should confuse the issues here. Nigel Griffiths conduct is on the public purse so an injuction is a travesty. We demand to know what he was up to and with who ! He is a disgrace and should resign or be deselected. Labour sleaze at its worst.

    Like

  50. 106
    Arthur Haynes (Comedian) says:

    Looks like Tiger’s trouser iron has done some great bunker work recently. Well done Tiger keep it up!

    Love child as well?? Hmmm

    AH (C)

    Like

  51. 107
    Anonymous says:

    Blair has fucked up big time on this….http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8410071.stm

    Like

  52. 110
    Jimmy says:

    Bizarre. There is no prohibition on photoshopping, therefore it would seem that in the event of such photos being published, they would not be able to enforce the order against anyone without proving that they were genuine.

    They make Bl@ney look good.

    Like

  53. 111
    A weese mon siad says:

    I’m putting money down that Tiger has done the business with more than 100 women.

    Come on Tiger my son help make me rich.

    Like

  54. 112
    A Pensioner says:

    Tiger’s not exactly an equal opportunities shagger.

    Like

  55. 114
    A Pensioner says:

    Stockings & suspenders – man or woman?

    Like

  56. 115
    JonTod says:

    The lawyers in this case I suspect are taking advantage of the situation for a bit of money grabbing from their client. I’m sure they knew they didn’t have a cat in hells chance of really blocking the pictures – only of stopping people in the UK from casually looking at them. All the solicitors are doing is making a quick buck.

    Like

  57. 126
    Steve Expat says:

    Guido, is this a so-called Super Injunction, restricting even mention of it’s existance? If so the Sunday Telegraph could be in trouble for mentioning it…

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/telegraph-view/6798318/Tiger-Woods-injunction-makes-an-ass-of-the-law.html

    Like

  58. 127
    Mr Ned says:

    Spot on TAT, Agree with every word there!

    Like

  59. 128
    Climate change denier and proud says:

    These halfwit lawyers clearly haven’t heard of the Internet.

    There are a thousand internet sites that you can find anything out about the shagging habits of celebrities.

    The real danger is when the media suppresses information about the Government

    Like

  60. 132
    Peter Jobess says:

    Wankers the lot of you! Who gives a shit about Woody, Barry or even Mandy…………..you tossers……….get a fucking brain……………

    Like

    • 141
      Chad Merchant says:

      Look, my somnambulant, post-democratic apologist friend, if there’s been any xxx sphincter-stretching action going on in the HoC, we, oi polloi, have not just a right, but a burning need to know! And watch. Repeatedly.

      You may not like it. But I do. We don’t just want open government, we DEMAND gaping, all-she-can-take close-up shots of the alleged deed.

      Like

  61. 138
    Herr Fritzl says:

    Dear Tiger,

    I am very disappointed to hear about your recent infidelities and no longer consider you to be a good role model for my children. I do however sympathize with your situation, I too have had some family problems of late and have through no fault of my own become separated from them. I also think that there is nothing more important than spending time with your family and being a good father. I wish you and your family all the best in the future and if you are looking for somewhere to get away from it all, I believe my old house is still up for sale.

    Regards

    Josef Fritzl

    Like

  62. 140
    13eastie (145 Days: Good-bye, Gordon!) says:

    Go for it, Guido.

    When you fuck a skanky porn actress, photos are SUPPOSED to be taken, Tiger!

    Thanks to this utterly silly injunction, we now all know that “Tiger” is not half as ludicrous as his real name: ELDRICK TONT WOODS. Anyone seeking nude photos should take note this is an anagram of “DICK LETS DOWN TORSO”.

    Don’t say I didn’t warn you…

    Like

    • 142
      13eastie (145 Days: Good-bye, Gordon!) says:

      Or maybe even DICK LET DOWN TORSO…

      You get the idea…

      Troppo primitivo…

      Like

  63. 143
    Judge Filth says:

    The main problem is British judges. -They are shit from the sewer. Most of the filth appointed as judges, by corrupt scum in politics, are dirty junkies, and many are perverts, paedophiles, homosexuals and dirty jews.

    British judges are liars, thieves, and corrupt scum. They have no decency or humanity or standards. The dirty trash should be burned like rubbish.

    Like

  64. 144
    Watt Tyler says:

    Bring it on! I’ll see you in court, you scum. Defend yourselves against this: http://eotp.wordpress.com/

    Like

  65. 145

    [...] Tiger Woods is a great golfer.  He has a few ‘issues’ with his wife and his personal conduct – which, frankly, I believe should be a private matter. What I do not want to see in our country is libel lawyers threatening all and sundry with ‘hell and damnation, contempt of court, prison, seizure of assets et al’ because some golfer fucks up and people want to to ‘extract the Michael’ .  Life is rather more serious, valuable and important than that.  We need to get a grip on superinjunctions, libel and freedom of the press.  Guido does what Guido does – and well done. [...]

    Like

  66. 147
    An Aussie says:

    Just been running a principal components analysis here at the Australian Climate Research Unit (ACRU) on the Tiger data.

    Waiting for peer review, and further funding from Soros to complete analysis, but the results so far show

    TSF = 1.0*White + 0.75*(Chest Size) +0.5 * Blond

    The TSF (Tiger Shagabilty Factor is then “normalised” on a scale 0-100. Only “scores” >50 need apply.

    PS further research needed.

    Like

  67. 148
    A Firm Pair Of Breasts says:

    I’m in just stocking and suspenders now….but I can’t find an MP.
    :-(

    Like

  68. 149
    H says:

    This is so important after Tonys remarks today11111

    Like

    • 152
      H says:

      soz – meant !!!!!! not the 1 things!!!!!!!

      Like

    • 230
      worried says:

      agh, british imperialism, don’t ya just luv it???

      where’s the democracy now??

      Oh, sorry, there’s never really been one – what we have is a sham, the least they can afford to give us and the most we will ever get

      Like

  69. 153
    Anonymous says:

    have you ever seen Obama and Tiger in the same place at any one time?Maybe they are both mixed race

    Like

  70. 157

    Off topic, but it is the festive season.
    Happy Christmas to all thermosceptics and wrap up well!

    Like

  71. 159
    13eastie (145 Days: Good-bye, Gordon!) says:

    Here is a picture of Tiger Woods naked.

    He is employed by Gillette to pose naked with their razors so that this image can be broadcast world-wide. (Like most men I know, I usually wear a Pringle sweater when I can be bothered to shave, but if Eldrick prefers to do it naked, it’s really a matter for him).

    This is his occupation – part of his everyday routine.

    But the advert is now outlawed.

    Why is Schillings trying to deprive its own client of his livelihood? (And me of the useful reminders to buy new razor blades)?

    Like

    • 169
      Anonymous says:

      Erm…make that “…was employed by Gillette…”

      Like

    • 180
      caesars wife says:

      i rather liked the idea of one the “hostesses !” appologising for ruining his wifes life , perhaps mary whitehouse was right all along then , pecker pleasure outside of marriage/relationship . aint no pleasure at all in the end . the Lusts/busts of labour and the desires of democrats eh !!

      CW notes how things have changed , an aqaintence who was due to get married to a nice girl was on a his useual friday night out with mates , looking cool getting pissed ,club and a curry , he was reasonable looking , as he stood at bar loverly girl came over in tight fitting number , giving cutie chat up askin which club he was off to , he knew he was on , told mates he had scored , told her he was single , went to club snogged her, she then went to toilet and never returned , he returned to his mates shrugged and carrried on getting pissed . Next day fiance turned up gave him both barrels of dissapointed chick rightous vengence , chucked photos of him with said girl . turned out she had hired a honey trap to ermm test him !!! engadgement over .

      Like

      • 202
        Two faced Liar says:

        Same thing happened to my mate. He was at his fiancee’s house the night before the wedding. Half way through the evening, fiancee and rest of family announce they have to go out – leaving little sister behind. She’s dressed very provocatively and offer to take groom upstairs for a quickie. Groom rushes out the front door – only to find bride, her parents and brother standing on the lawn!!!!

        Moral: Always remember to leave your condoms in the car.

        Like

  72. 160
    Arch-Duck Franz Ferdinads says:

    Sometimes ya blog is shite, but when you get it good, you get it good.

    Like

  73. 172
    Smiley-In-Your-Stout says:

    There couldn’t be a better time for this to appear than now, with the McCanns in Portugal trying with all their legal might and money to stop the book about the Police investigation appearing in English in the UK.

    Why are our media so craven in front of the McCann machine? Why do we never hear anything about what’s in the police files, about the crucial evidence held up by the UK Police, about Gordon Brown’s involvement in the early stages (when he was Chancellor with no possible justification for getting involved).

    What super injunctions have been issued in the McCanns’ name? We know that for about a year the UK public were denied knowledge that Madeleine McCann had been made a ward of court or that public agencies had been instructed by a High Court judge to co-operate with her parents – even when they were arguidos (prime suspects) in the case.

    Like

  74. 173
    nine iron says:

    Tiger tees up his balls.

    Like

  75. 179
    caesars wife says:

    Dont think ESSO will be interested in him now , although could be some money in new topless bar called frosties “there great!” .

    Com res gives conservatives 14% lead although 24% still say they will vote Labour , but what does Labour voter look like , weve had months of explanations why Labour are a mind bending disater and waste of time , I dont need convincing that they are evil crooks , so I wonder what the 24% must be thinking , the hard core of wonk marxists project are in so called safe seats , so as Darth Brown issues his bitter “you have all failed me for the last time” and tempts with a snap election , Ray collins says “comming ready or not ” , what are we to make of it .
    On the one hand the far right seem to have stopped polishing bronze busts of dead facist militarists , and decided people want roads repaired , safer streets and keep having regular spurts of belief in democracy now that they have sussed marxist NWO control freakery . The conservatives have just about decided it will not be business as usual and the task of getting back to low tax is not going to be easy as all suffer under runinomics , the economy in some aspects of personal aspirations is badly damaged , social mobility is now somthing you get if your in Labour quango land and no one is quite sure how much of future pensions have been gambled . So many of the Blair era soundbites and union echos seem so hollow now , there is no socialist solution to the scale of the ruin , massive state has sunk in its own pool of waste. In the end as with all socialism it had to bring about conscription , ID cards (personal tax) , copenhagen (global governance tax) , tobin tax (living transaction tax) . ALL the guff about giving you state eurotopia , involves the state being able to tax anything you do and recording it , its a kind of electronic stasi that tells you your free so long as you comply , and you must comply as you can never be free from the states reach.

    CW really hopes that when this is all over , some text books will be re written and the Blair/ruin will be some sort of fall of the socialist empire in high ed .

    Its no so much as this disater is some sort of left over from the cold war , its that now they have had full rein , total controll , is still a massive fail , sending people into poverty and depression , corrupting democracy , and damaging the planet.

    next week we have copehnagen wk2 , already draft agreement has trouble , yet real greenies (and not tax NWO fakers) have struggled to get some messages across , CW notes that equations, caluclations and risk analysis are of little use if you miss somthing that is of vital importance , man made global warming is having some questions asked , but taxing carbon bears no relation to , the carbon cycle as it only adress the burning , the forests do not benefit form tax (urban economies and government do) , they only benfit from clean water and very limited resource exploitation. The main fresh water rivers proivde food if clean , but nothing being said about third world industialisation (govt funded) killing rivers , or cheap workers enjoying poor urban sanitation . The fact you can close a steel plant in teeside and make £90mn out carbon credits indicates for corporatists coiffers , is the wonkness of making the rich poor for equality run by a wealthy marxist elite .

    900 people are rioting for NWO taxation run by marxist crooks , what a let down to get home and still find them polluting and using damaging agriculture in secret for tax !

    Like

    • 410
      Francis Futurama says:

      Insightful summary, especially agree that ID Cards are primarily for personal taxation; I have always argued this. The day ID Cards are scrapped on cost grounds would signal the start of the most desperate phase of the Nu Labour scam yet, as it would indicate that we are now so bankrupt as to be unable to afford to generate the new regime necessary to squeeze blood out of the stone to pay for the banking disaster. Of course, whatever announcement on ID Cards, the cards themselves are dispensible in the grand scheme of things, as long as the NIR database is retained.

      Like

  76. 185
    Tomorrow belongs to????? says:

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article6954609.ece

    The “polls” are all over the place but if Gordon want’s to believe YouGov then ….Go on Gordon go for it and make 60 million people very very happy

    Like

  77. 190
    Mitch says:

    Trying to ban anything with the internet here just makes the star look stupid and the law firm out of touch and just taking the guys money for nothing.

    Too late mate ! if they could power a space ship with bad news we could reach the stars hohoho!!

    Like

  78. 191
    Mitch says:

    Oh I forgot my wife has said if I buy any more Gillette razors she will assume Im having an affair and move to Sweden……..thanks Tiger!

    Like

  79. 192
    Vote Vote Vote for Jacqui. says:

    It seems like good olde Tiger has had more tarts than Mr.Kipling.
    Were any of these birds colourds? Were they all blonde,chubby,bimbos?
    Why have none of these young,well sort of young ladies,been Afro Carribean
    or of mixed race like the man himself?

    Like

  80. 194
    Pimble_Searcher says:

    How much is that Max cliff turd getting to talk the guy up on TV?

    The advertising sponsorship deal with Gillette remains on a razor blade’s edge, so I hear, but the one with Nike remains sure footed.

    Like

  81. 198
    France base liebour hater says:

    Didn’t the gruesome Balls couple obtain one of these injunctions to stop details of their expenses getting into the public domain?

    Like

  82. 200
    • 324
      udderly 'orrible says:

      Well the world’ best news agency (now Canadian owned) got that wrong didn’t it, the evil injunction covers England and Wales only.

      Like

  83. 201
    Stan Shall says:

    They bite

    They injunct

    They make an awful fuss

    It’s no use stroking them and saying “pussy pussy puss”

    Oh

    Grunting Tigers out in Indiana

    Out in, out in, out in Indiana (yuh).

    Like

  84. 204
    BillyBob ... reduce our carbon footprint, stop immigration? says:

    Majority of the great and good in Parliament are lawyers so no surprise that they create work for their own profession…..

    Like

  85. 205
    Mike Hunt says:

    That such a blanket order can be granted is absolutely frightening. And banning pictures of ‘any naked part’ of his body presumably includes photos showing his face? I take a fairly keen interest in current affairs and politics, but I wasn’t aware of just how evil a super injunction could be.

    Like

  86. 206
    RestandBthankful says:

    BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS!

    The Prime Mentalist becomes the first Prime Minister to ……………..

    wait for it ………………

    stay overnight in the air base at Kandahar. Now let me see. He goes unannounced so no one knows he’s there (apart from his staff and Karzi) and this is reported as a big deal, why?

    No 5 star hotel for the Prime Mentalist he sleeps in the same shity conditions that he makes our HEROES stay in month after month, year after year, and somehow because he stays overnight (surrounded by an army), unannounced to the rest of the world, this is somehow worthy of mention. Nobel Peace prize for a prize numpty in the offing perhaps? Well he’s as worthy of it as Obamarama.

    Like

    • 208
      Fees Office Clerk says:

      Sky News were fucking comparing the fat c.unt’s so called bravery to that of Churchill by virtue of the fact that he slept in a warzone overnight. GRRRRR!

      Like

      • 236
        Tomorrow belongs to????? says:

        Now c’mon…. give Brown his due………It takes real courage to stay overnight in the midst of a highly trained,armed group of professionals who hate your guts

        Like

    • 209
      hooper dooper says:

      did he stay in the Pink Corner?

      Like

    • 211
      Doc Trough says:

      Truly the Audie Murphy of the rear echelon.

      Like

    • 223
      Anonymous says:

      Let’s hope Alchy Ada gets her shit together then.

      Like

    • 234
      V for Vendetta says:

      Kandahar is luxurious cimpared to Helmand FOB’s. And it’s American controlled. Why did the fuckwit not go to Bastion? British bases not safe enough? Why would that be then?.

      Like

      • 239
        AND .......the vote of the luxembourg jury is says:

        “…………British bases not safe enough? Why would that be then?…..”

        They had a vote and decided that they didn’t want him ??

        Like

      • 242
        Anonymous says:

        If Kandahar is a Yank camp then gordon will be getting 5 star Hotel Service and is probably safer thgere than Downing Street. I see Dave Spent his time with the British troops last weekend

        Like

    • 238
      Snotty says:

      I’m very disappointed with the servicemen and women. All that weaponry and not one of them thought to shoot the bastard!

      Like

    • 244
      Concerned Climate Change Believer says:

      I am getting increasingly concerned about Brown’s ever more frequent and unnecessary trips to Afghanistan for photo opportunities, and the amount of CO2 these trips are generating.

      Only last week he was lecturing the world on the dangers of CO2 and was handing over billions to other countries to help them fight global warming.

      Hasn’t anybody told him about video conferencing, internet video and chat facilities, or even email if he wants to say hello to Karzai or a few British soldiers and generals?

      Like

      • 309
        Never were so many gulled by so few says:

        BBC ecstatically spinning that Brown is the first PM since CHURCHILL(we’ll just repeat that …CHURCHILL) to spend the night in a warzone!!!
        They continue rather breathlessly that he wished to see-IN SOME SMALL WAY the hardships our troops undergo……………………..what they actually mean is that as usual Brown is using our armed services for electioneering purposes(expect footage of “BRAVE” BROWN AT THE FRONT in forthcoming Labour party political broadcasts)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        Like

    • 256
      England expects every man to do his duty. says:

      A VC with Bar for the first soldier to blow Brown’s brains out AND send the press a photo – no super injunction there,my boy,more like SUPER DOOPER HURRAH BROWN IS DEAD!

      Like

    • 305
      barefootcontessa says:

      Did he really sleep under canvas with his braces over his pyjamas? (rumour I’ve just heard).

      Like

  87. 207
    Quentin Davies MP says:

    ‘You can ring ma bell, ‘ell ‘ell, ring ma bell’

    Like

  88. 213
    Oswald Spengler says:

    Is Tiger’s middle name really “Tont”?

    Like

  89. 225
    legless and angry says:

    OT but I see in the Mail that Squeaker Bercow wants to take a safe seat so that he cannot be unseated by Nigel Farage. The greedy grubby little fecker, I hope his missus has given him a dose of the pox.

    Like

    • 243
      Buckingham to buck the Speaker ? says:

      Also see his “missus” been adopted as Labour candidate to fight next election too prompting calls for the Buckingham Association to de-select him as his “office” is now politically compromised. Could it be that Bercow will go down in the history books as the first Speaker to lose an election with Toriy Voters lining up to support Farage at the election ?

      Like

    • 322
      udderly 'orrible says:

      He wants to create an entirely new seat within the boundaries of parliament so only MPs can vote for him. The berk.

      Like

  90. 227
    City of Vice says:

    Just seen Ed Balls on the BBC Marr show right. Jeez, he’s useless. Rambling, incoherent, pushy and clearly dishonest. The term shifty The more airtime Balls gets, the more votes Labour lose.

    Looking forward to the next election when the spiv Balls has his own ‘Portillo’ moment.

    It speaks volumes that this pillock is Brown’s right hand man.

    Like

    • 231
      City of Vice says:

      Typo- I meant to write :

      ‘Just seen Ed Balls on the BBC Marr show right. Jeez, he’s useless. Rambling, incoherent, pushy and clearly dishonest. To describe him as a shifty bastard is an understatement. The more airtime Balls gets, the more votes Labour lose.’

      Like

      • 251
        Mitch says:

        The thought of balls stopping people working with kids when he looks like the creepiest peado on the planet is so nu-labia.
        What an odious little shit he really is, I hope I see his “Portillo” moment.

        Like

    • 262
      The Trouble With Balls. says:

      Watched it while in the gym,laughing out loud so much the woman next to me (had a nice arse actually,Tiger) must have thought I was bonkers.

      Nazi Balls really is a very odd git – I am sure there is a wire in his head that has become disconnected – he speaks and then has to stop while his brain catches up.

      If he EVER got the PM or Chancellor role,he would be demolished within seconds – by himself.

      As for shifty – there is no person so repugnant – you really can see him in the death camps explaining to a group of Jews that it really IS a shower and to hurry along cos he has other more important things to do.

      Like

    • 265
      English Liberation Front says:

      Yes, one of New Labour’s nastier little spuds.

      Like

    • 279
      Ratsniffer says:

      Balls is one of the most repugnant of this generation of Numarxist politicians, though he has some stiff competition.

      Though I don’t know what he is like face to face, on TV and in the commons he comes across as arrogant and nasty, with a school bully persona and a smug shit-eating grin.

      No amount of coaching by smoothie media spinmiesters will change him; and he and his type, and their complete disconnect with the lives of ordinary people, is a major reason why the public are deserting Zanulabour in droves…

      Like

      • 306
        barefootcontessa says:

        Would you buy a second hand car from that man?

        Like

      • 321
        udderly 'orrible says:

        His boywife?

        Like

        • 386
          Tracing Balls says:

          Balls has just GOT to be related to Adolf Hitler (he only had one) – is this why he refuses to appear on;

          “Who Do You Think You Are?”

          And the boy wonder Cooper – there’s got to be a “Braun” there somewhere,and I don’t mean the shaver.

          Like

      • 384
        Gonk says:

        One of the worst, no laughable character flaws
        about Balls is that he thinks he can play football.

        He shouts a name on the pitch hits a hopeful heave
        upfield and absolves himself of personal responsibility.

        It ends up on the roof of a bungalow.

        Like

  91. 232
    Echo? says:

    The true cost of the Jonah sneaking in through the back door and signing Lisbon. This of course has been happening for some time but the Lisbon signature is now sounding the death nell. Meanwhile spansih fishermen continue to haul fish with sight of our coastline and all perfectly legally.

    “Town’s last fisherman driven out of business by EU rules”

    There were once so many fishing boats in Great Yarmouth that locals claimed you could walk across the harbour over the decks of the fleet. But now, after years of decline prompted by European Union quotas and environmental concerns over fish stocks, the town’s last full-time fisherman has announced he is quitting the industry.

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/earth/earthnews/6796366/Towns-last-fisherman-driven-out-of-business-by-EU-rules.html

    Like

  92. 233
    NS says:

    ‘Sliding down the razor blade of life…’

    Like

  93. 237
    RestandBthankful says:

    224 – The ignoramus couldn’t string a sentence together could he? Unless of course he has a speech impediment – to match his brain impediment, oh wait he’s a brainless twat.

    Like

    • 248
      The gullibility of the gullible says:

      Look – you’re talking about the next Labour leader and Prime Minister you know. Once Gordon has lead the party to a resounding fourth victory in March Ed will be made Chancellor and then after Gordon has presided at the Olympics in 2012(to the plaudits of the World’s Media)he will step down and support Ed for Prime Minister.

      Like

    • 263
      Wrong Wrong Wrong says:

      What’s the odd impediment between friends – after all there’s only another 60 million Brits to choose from.

      What’s wrong with NOT being able to write,spell,speak,think,calculate,tell the truth,represent your nation,inspire a nation,lead people to greater things,have a vision,take people with you and just generally be able to speak normally with those around you – after all,it’s only the job of PRIME Minister!

      Brown and Balls – same letter of the alphabet,same fate – ELECTION DEATH.

      Like

  94. 240
    anon, anon, anon...... says:

    I wonder if Gorgon will be repaying the cost of his wife’s phone calls witout being asked?

    Like

    • 295
      Prime Minister Gordon Brown says:

      “I’m repaying the cost of the telephone calls because it’s the right thing to do. Nobody asked me to. I did it myself.”

      Like

  95. 250
    Harriet Harman says:

    Just for reference, I haven’t slept with Tiger Woods.

    Like

    • 255
      BillyBob ... reduce our carbon footprint, stop immigration? says:

      Hmmmm……have you told him where he can find you ma’am??

      Like

      • 434
        Mini Haha says:

        ma’am? Harriet?
        hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahhaha

        Like

  96. 257
    Agent 99 says:

    Whats the difference between Tiger woods and Gordon Brown?

    One pitches to get out of a bunker while the other pitches to stay in.

    Like

  97. 266
    Climategate says:

    Global warming is recent?

    So why was there no ice at the North Pole in 1958 and 1959?

    http://wattsupwiththat.com/2009/04/26/ice-at-the-north-pole-in-1958-not-so-thick/

    Like

    • 290
      Ratsniffer says:

      You are a climate change denier. You will be awoken at 2am by an armed and masked squad from the newly formed EU Klimate StormenTroopenpolitzie and escorted to Camp 1057/01 for “re-education”

      Your family will be billed for your costs, unless of course, our re-education programme should have a negative outcome and your stay has to be “terminated”.

      Like

  98. 267
    Sarah Brown says:

    I did not sleep with Gordon Brown nor Tiger Woods

    Like

  99. 269
    bandersnatch says:

    Go for it, Guido!

    Like

  100. 270
    Peter Mandelson says:

    I’ve had them both

    Like

  101. 276
    Anonymous says:

    Justice Eady granted the injunction, there’s a surprise!

    Like

  102. 283
    RestandBthankful says:

    Has the world noit been warming since the ice age?

    Like

  103. 284
    RestandBthankful says:

    Sorry that was a posh moment “noit” should have read not.

    Like

  104. 288
    RestandBthankful says:

    Since he is an English judge in England and Wales does that mean that his sooper dooper injunkshions don’t apply in Scotland. Does that mean I can publish an English translation of Amaral’s book on my website and piccies of the naked Eldrick (should that be BallDick) as well?

    Like

    • 395
      Anonymous says:

      Well, I’m not encouraging piracy but torrents of “A.Verdade.da.Mentira.(The Truth of.Lie)” are ‘out there’…

      Like

  105. 292
    Joe Public says:

    Schillings’s communication is crap.

    1. They mention only photos taken by “X” & “Y”, but some may have been taken by “Z”.

    2. Someone really ought to know that parentheses come in pairs. [Unlike Mr Woods who apparently has come in many more.]

    Like

  106. 304
    Moley says:

    The courts in this country are a sick joke and worth nothing but utter contempt.
    It has been my personal experience that wives and mothers in the family court can ignore court orders completely which seriously affect the lives of children and their fathers. The courts are not interested and do not even make the slightest attempt to enforce their orders.

    The only thing that would stop me from breaking this particular court order, (were I in a position to do so) is human decency, which quality appears to be have been severely lacking in this episode.

    The Courts cannot have it both ways; either all orders are defended by the full power and dignity of the court, or none are.

    Were I in a position to break a court order and were it in my power and interest to do so, I would do it without hesitation.

    The Law Lords have only themselves to blame; the contempt of the public for the Court system has been strenuously earned by a crooked and corrupt upper house and a court system which wields justice in an arbitrary fashion which pays far more attention to the wealth of the parties concerned than it does to law and public interest.

    Never has their been such a gulf between law and justice.

    Like

    • 320
      In another world says:

      While in London last Thursday,I walked along Fleet St and thought I would pop in to the Law Courts.

      I ended up in the No 4 court – with the Lord Chief Justice of England & Wales presiding himself as that is evidently his own court.

      Amazingly he is actually called Igor Judge and Baron Judge and so is known as Lord Judge – surely Mandelson has already nabbed that particular title already for himself?

      As my wife said,when he was simply a Judge,was he called Judge Judge? Or was it Baron Judge Judge or Judge Baron Judge,or even Judge Judge Baron (Cohen?).

      Sitting there for 90 minutes showed me very clearly how out of date this system is.

      Like entering an 18th century costume drama – they are literally in another world.

      Like

      • 343
        A weese mon siad says:

        can you just walk into a court and watch a case then? I might have found a new hobby

        Like

        • 352
          Anonymous says:

          Be nice to the ushers and they start saving you seats!

          Like

        • 366
          In another world says:

          Er no,I forgot to mention,I was sitting in the dock on a quadruple murder attempt charge;

          Gordon Brown
          Harriet Spunkperson
          Nazi Balls
          Jack Fuckhead Straw

          Judge Judge or whatever he is gave me a Distinguished Service Cross with ten free passes to their Bar.

          Yes,seriously you can – just watch out for the sirport style metal/baggage detectors.

          Bloody fascinating – I was going to shout out to Judge Judge “Ere Judge,is this where they will be prosecuting Brown and Balir next year?”,but he fixed me with a SUPER hard stare at one point and I had to go and change my trousers.

          Like

      • 393
        Unsworth says:

        Difficult to judge, really.

        Like

  107. 310
    barefootcontessa says:

    Stop Press!!!!! Cherie’s had 4 immaculate conceptions!!!! Tony’s only ever slept with a bible.

    Like

  108. 312
    A weese mon siad says:

    Georgie is making PROPA promises on the beeb right now.

    Like

  109. 314
  110. 315
    RestandBthankful says:

    Bobaintbustinagut on the Politics show now. According to him we are living in “uncertain times”. Talking about trident.

    Like

  111. 316
    A weese mon siad says:

    Tiger has a small willy which is surprising considering the stereotypical jokes usually made.

    Like

  112. 318
    Steve Expat says:

    They Deserve to be ejected into orbit

    – Boris, talking about the Labour party, on the Marr show this morning. Brilliant!

    Like

  113. 319
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Tiger didn’t want to marr his reputation.

    Like

  114. 323
    Dave "Cast Iron Guarantee" Cameron says:

    A BBC News Headline reads, “Palace denies William taking on duties of Queen”. Too right…

    …nobody will replace Freddie Mercury for me.

    Like

  115. 325
    caesars wife says:

    CW gives Boris this weeks best andrew marr performance he manged to insert “nasty” into leftest !! and ta tdaa got marr to admit to Loretto . Ed balls tried to make the case that were not going to say that we now think everyone is a peadophile as some how being better !! but totally evaded treasury questions

    Ruin in Afghanistan , surprise visit , so ime not tony blair who is the war criminal !! Teflon tone does surprise pre chilcot interview robust place in history you wouldnt think he presided over ruinomics , thanks for the debt tony , was the ruin really the greatest chancellor of all time??

    Like

    • 405
      barefootcontessa says:

      How is it that St. Tone needs so many heavys to look after him? I’d have thought his god would’ve done that.

      Like

  116. 327
    rain man says:

    Global Warming nutjobs freeze their balls off in Copenhagen.

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/8410414.stm

    Like

  117. 329
    Plane stoopid says:

    But if you put your personal copy of the super injunction on Wikileaks, won’t the Dear Mr fawkes give the game away?

    Like

  118. 332
    swinging dick says:

    Gillette have squandered a golden advertising opportunity.

    “Be like Tiger, get more holes in one with Gillette.”

    Like

  119. 336
    Snaps says:

    Nigel Griffiths, an MP caught on camera with his trousers down in his office with a woman in only her stockings and suspenders

    Who was the snapper? Third party or self portrait?

    Like

  120. 347
    • 349
      Anonymous says:

      You look like a CUNΤ in anything dear.

      Like

      • 351
        Gordon says:

        And This

        Like

        • 394
          What a mess says:

          Hilarious!

          A Suit
          A white shirt
          A Green Helicopter Hat
          A blue flak jacket (hopefully with the material taken out and replaced with rolled up copies of Brown’s condolence letters).

          At least can we get a PM to LOOK half decent and with just a grain of gravitas!

          Like

    • 354
      Scientific evidence says:

      Can we test the strength of the hat that shit for brains is wearing – perhaps by using an axe – you hold him down I will cut his grotty head off at the neck and then we drop the head from the top of the other prick’s bell tower,preferably on Ball’s Nazi head.

      Nothing like a scientific experiment eh?

      Like

    • 357
      Brown - the colour of shit says:

      And that outfit is just to protect him from the BRITISH soldiers…..

      Hey, Brown – you piece of dog excrement – we are going to blow your political life to pieces – bring it on you utter Hunt.

      Name the day you fraudster and we shall annihilate you – wipe you and your thugs off the political map forever.

      Brown – the greatest coward the world has ever known.

      Like

    • 407
      anon, anon, anon...... says:

      Makes a good ‘ shot ‘for the crosshairs Guido

      Like

  121. 358
    hooper dooper says:

    If Gordon Brown made a meat pie, it would be full of sinew and gristle, it would have thick Ed Balls semen salty crust on top, with Yvette Copper plaster of paris pastry flowers – a total fucking disaster whether or not you like meat pies

    Like

  122. 362
    Jonah says:

    “Gordon Brown: I’m backing Stacey Solomon”

    Gordon Brown has revealed that he and his family are backing Stacey Solomon to win The X Factor.

    http://www.thejc.com/news/uk-news/22187/gordon-brown-im-backing-stacey-solomon

    Like

  123. 367
    That's Democracy says:

    What is the point commentating on something as laughable as the Parliamentary Standards Committee? There are no standards. The whole lot need to be cleared out. Change will only arrive when it suits the scum who fleece the country and dwell in something pathetic known as “Parliament.”

    On the subject of dress, yes, this remains important. The illusion of tradition it is designed to provoke, with old fraudsters wearing hilarious wigs and tottering around in long frocks, invites identification with something that is, apparently “inherently British.” Alas people seem to fall for this. I watched, with mounting amazement, Saxe-Coburg Gotha, a trougher without peer, makes some kind of speech about parliament/policy. To say it was idiotic would be to underplay the pathetic, awful and embarrasing spectacle. The most disappointing thing of all is that the British continue to fall for this.

    Still think you are living in a democracy?

    Like

    • 379
      Anonymous says:

      In the case I briefly saw,the prosecution and defence both admitted they had been unable to get the media software working on their laptops during the lunch break to understand what had been said re some taped evidence.

      Our Learned Judge said that while he would not ask for it to be transcribed by 4pm (this was Thursday 2pm),he would ask that it be translated by…..(relatives crane their necks forward in anticipation that he will say Friday morning) next Wednesday (cue relatives literally gasping with frustration).

      Like

  124. 371
    Fore! ward to the future says:

    So with Tiger Woods running riot around the white trash of the US,can we expect some amazing golfers to pop up in about 20 years time?

    Imagine,there could be a whole British Open Tournament in about 2030 with hundreds of these lookalikes teeing off one after the other – better lock up your daughter’s daughters………

    Like

  125. 380
    the pro from dover says:

    This is a nightmare for poor Cheetah.

    I was exposed to a photo of him topless with a dangerous implement……

    …. naw, a four-blade razor …..

    Surely his sponsors are now in breach of the injunction?
    This is terrible, the whole foundation of our consumer society is now under threat.

    I can’t go on, I’m a nervous wreak. My golf game will never recover.

    http://www.examiner.com/x-15870-Populist-Examiner~y2009m12d9-Is-Tiger-Woods-finished

    Like

  126. 385
    Ratkins says:

    Did anyone notice there are no less than 4 references on this letter – four lawyers at a average of £400 per hour to write this incomprehensible garbage – they saw Tiger the cash cow comming.

    Like

  127. 389
    firstlight40 says:

    Guido, is that photo of the PM in afghanistan with the troops for real – looks photoshopped to me. Worth an investigation? Can’t believe any of our troops would stand with the Jonah, not worth their lives (literally!)

    Like

    • 402
      The Dirty Rat says:

      I have got to say that when you zoom in, the bloke on his right has his left foot in a very strange position and it would be touching Broon’s fight foot. Who the fuck would want to do that!

      Like

  128. 390
    Nuts says:

    Where is Fawkes?Come in,Fawkes,over.

    Like

  129. 391
    We,The People says:

    Joke Joke Joke,bring em on Dave

    Like

    • 392
      Dave "Cast Iron Guarantee" Cameron says:

      Alright – just the one for the moment;

      A Policeman pulls a blonde in a sports car over for speeding and is trying to explain to her what and where her driver’s license might be. After she eventually gives him her driver’s license, he asks for registration.

      Getting another blank blonde look from her, he explains, “It’s that little piece of paper you get with your car and you keep it in the glove compartment.”

      “Ah,” she says as she bends over to get it. While she is looking through the glove compartment, the officer unzips his pants and pulls his member out.

      Excited that she had found her registration, she turns around and looks up. A look of dismay crosses her face and she says, “Oh, no! Not another breathalizer test!”

      Like

    • 404
      Doh - it's TAT says:

      Heh dickhead – you forgot your normal “spastic” mention.

      Takes one to know one,eh?

      Like

    • 413
      ali bongo says:

      We can cut and paste our own jokes now you сunt.

      No fucking cigar.

      http://www.comedy-zone.net/

      Like

  130. 403
    Dave "Austerity" Cameron says:

    This year some prostitutes are offering free sex to anyone attending the UN Global Warming summit. Although if you do sleep with a prostitute at the Global warming summit just remember to cap your emissions.

    Like

  131. 406
    Tiger"Chubby" Woods says:

    I reckon I’ll follow Dave Cameron’s example and become a stand up comedian

    I always remember my mother’s funeral. As they were carrying out the coffin they accidentally bumped into a wall, which was followed by a knocking sound. They opened the coffin and found that she was still alive. She lived for another 10 years.

    I also remember the looks my father got at her second funeral after he demanded the pallbearers “Watch out for the fucking wall this time!”

    Like

  132. 411
    Anonymous says:

    Justice Eades? might have known – is he paid by Schillings?

    Like

  133. 420
    conrad belushi says:

    According to most of the women who felt the force of Tigers wood, he didn’t even buy them a dinner or fuck all else, the Shylock.

    Who can blame them for coming out like gays at a BBC wankfest, and making some belated dosh?

    Like

  134. 421
    Ed Balls says:

    I want to make it quite clear, I am not a CIA agent.

    Like

  135. 428
    Anonymous says:

    So having seen the order can I now ring that mobile number for Simon and ask him if it is alright for me to view any naked parts of Tiger Woods. Do you think they do reverse charges????

    So in effect Tiger and his team has made it illegal to show images that have naked parts of him. Like all those adverts. Hummm might be a bit of an own goal that one.

    Like

  136. 438
    Piston Broke says:

    How come (cum) neither the dead tree press or the blogosphere reported on TWs liaisions until now? It has been going on for some little while.

    The cover up is reminiscent of that with JF Kennedy’s affairs. Or has one “super injunction” just expired & the truth can now be told?

    Like


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cynic says:

Can anyone help me? I went on holiday a week ago and returned to find someone has pulled out the stake and Gordon Brown is back and acting as Prime Minister. What did I miss? Has there been a snap election?


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