December 11th, 2009

LibDems Not Winning Here

This coming Monday night all over London crack teams of digital war-planners will be extraordinarily rendered into the back of black vans with darkened windows to an undisclosed secret location. With only months to go before full scale political war breaks out, digital advertising and campaigns agency MessageSpace* has, in the tradition of the trenches of the First World War, organised a frontline truce with drinks. After doing paintball battle…

Combatants from CCHQ’s and Labour’s digital teams will be fighting with leading bloggers (cough) and online campaigners from the political world. It should be fun, it could be brutal, hopefully Guido won’t be too bruised.

Despite being invited, the LibDem’s failed to muster a team…

*Yes, they sell Guido’s adverts.


  1. 1
    Boycott the Licence Fee says:

    Lib/Lab/Con. One party with three names. The act’s wearing a bit thin.

  2. 2
    Not long until Labour gone says:

    “UK Prime Minister Gordon Brown said the UK’s promise, at £500m ($800m; 553m euros) a year was the highest.”

    Is Gordon committing political suicide on purpose or is he just thick?

  3. 3
    Charles Flaccidwidger says:

    Is that what Mandy’s practising for in the caption competion?

  4. 4
    Engineer says:

    Mrs Dale vs. Master Baiter? Handbags at dusk….

  5. 5

    I admire your restraint Guido, I’m afraid thatif I was in a room, or better, a secluded patch of woodland, with those treasonous filth, and drink was involved, I’d almost certainly thump the fuckers. I just hate them all. I can’t see any solution to our woes that doesn’t include slaughtering them all and dancing among their slithering guts, and that saddens me, because these are new shoes.

  6. 6
    Dave "Cast Iron Guarantee" Cameron says:

    I’ll be there reeling off my gags to the bitter end

    My laptop crashed yesterday,

    I knew I shouldn’t have let it drive

  7. 7

    Their common purpose is to make us work so they don’t have to.

  8. 8
    Engineer says:

    Paintballing? Sounds like one of those ludicrous ‘team bonding’ sessions that some large employers send their employees on.

    The session in the pub sounds more sensible.

  9. 9
    The Admiral says:

    Bit early for the gin/gunenness, Guido,,, e3rrr (hic)….

  10. 10
    But what will be left afterwards ? says:

    Its all part of Brown’s ” Scorched Earth” strategy – he knows deep down in his psyche that he’s going to lose the election to the Conservatives but he knows he’s got 6 months to ensure that they inherit nothing and that the country is totally bankrupted.

    It’s a trait of all sociopaths – his view is that the country and its citizens are not worthy to have him as their leader and so they must pay for that disloyalty and betrayal by their financial ruination

  11. 11
    Wee Gordy says:

    If ye’ve got it, spend it!

    If ye havenae got it, borrow it and spend it!

    Nothin’s ma fault, ye understan’.

  12. 12
    Four eyes says:

    …hopefully Guido won’t be too bruised.

    If MB is all they have then you should be OK.

  13. 13
    13eastie (146 Days: Good-bye, Gordon!) says:

    That’s a million coats of paint for a dacha in layman’s terms.

  14. 14
    A fisherman says:

    I can lend you some waders.

  15. 15
    The IMF is coming says:

    Bit O/T

    Labour online brainwashing department must be having their own party this afternoon;
    Not many Pro comments on this one

  16. 16
    The Admiral says:


  17. 17
    Nick Robinson says:

    Has anyone out there seen me paint balling??

    Be very afraid,Guido

  18. 18
    thick as thieves says:

    oh I don’t know AC1, I seem to have the party trolls working their fucking nuts off here. I’ve got the fuckers toiling so much they are sweating like rapists on the scene of the crime with a knife in their hands.
    ps. do you need a wingman, Guido?

  19. 19
    Blue Team Leader says:

    If Draper is present,go live.

  20. 20
    Hugh Janus says:

    Sorry this O/T – “The Prime Minister upped the British figure at the last minute from £1.2 billion to £1.5 billion – the largest national share – to encourage bigger offers, particularly from Spain and Italy.”

    1. Why is is every time McBust goes abroad he feels compelled to scoop up so much of our cash in order to hand it over to someone else? Are we in this country not a sufficiently deserving cause? It is, after all, OUR money.

    2. Has he the slightest idea what negotiation is about, or does he just want to look big at our expense?

    3. We are the last out of recession and our economy teeters on the edge of bankruptcy. The future is very bleak. The living standars of a generation have been severely eroded. We face paying for NuLiebour’s financial shambles for years to come. Where’s the money coming from for this??

    4. What cunning plan has he put in place to ensure that this cash doesn’t finish up in the swiss bank account of President A Thieving-Baboon of the Banana Republic?

    5. Has this ‘gift’ for the ridiculous global warming con been put to the vote in in the H of C? If not, why not?

    You definitely could not, as they say, make up anything like this.

  21. 21
    thick as thieves says:

    sorry nick, people with down’s syndrome are not allowed to take part.
    insurance reasons you understand. they might eat the paint balls.

  22. 22
    Anonymous says:

    I thought you ran messagespace with dale?

  23. 23
    Now is the winter of our discontent says:

    With respect – bollocks to this fun and games.

    We have GOT to stop the c*unt Brown from giving our money away – billions more promised for other countries on made-up scams.


  24. 24
    Now is the winter of our discontent says:

    Frank we march and we do it now.

  25. 25
    Gordon Brown says:

    I am now able to disclose that “the undisclosed secret location ” is ,in fact,Helmand Province.

    Ideally suited for paintballing

  26. 26
    Anonymous says:

    Guido, you are fucking bonkers…

    If the politicians get hold of you they could use the old “We thought the bullets were blanks..” training ground incident ‘excuse’…

  27. 27
    The Admiral says:

    Like this bit…”Poorer nations have accused rich countries of proposing miserly contributions to help them adopt green technology. The new climate change fund, eventually expected to grow to more than £60 billion a year, will go towards measures such as sea walls, hurricane defences and low-water agricultural techniques, as well as protecting rainforests and cutting emissions.”

    Poor bl**dy Norfolk and East coast. EA here aren’t bothered about the UK ….

  28. 28
    knowwhatimeansquire says:


  29. 29

    Just consider how our MP’s are throwing our money around….
    “Carbon trading fraudsters may have accounted for in some European countries, up to 90pc of all market activity with criminals pocketing an estimated €5bn (£4.5bn) mainly in Britain, France, Spain, Denmark and Holland, according to Europol, the European law enforcement agency.”
    ….Already under last year’s Climate Change Act – on the Government’s own figures – we in Britain alone are committed to shell out £18 billion every year from now until 2050. ….But even this may look like a gross underestimate when we realise that it is now the law of the land that, over the same 40 years, Britain must cut its emissions of carbon dioxide by a staggering 80 percent or more. ….Short of an as-yet undreamed of technological revolution, this could not possibly be achieved without closing down not just most of our transport system and electricity supplies but virtually all of our current economic activity.”

    Do the government intend to ‘print’ said money, or is it more likely that the taxpayers (the poor) have to pauper themselves some more while the rich just flit off somewhere ?

  30. 30
    Jilly says:

    Have you seen the latest local council results from this week? Labour taking seats from Tories all over the country.

  31. 31
    The Admiral says:


    Almost too late.

    Slash and burn.

    As someone said “when its all gone, its gone…”

  32. 32
    The Admiral says:

    Good point, Guido. Don’t go out in the woods today (whenever) etc etc…

  33. 33
    Jilly says:

    Who do you hate? They are just people like you. Some of us hate the Tories but we don’t go on about it in such a vehement manner. Relax and read a good book.

  34. 34
    Private Parts says:

    A piece of advice, keep the mask on at all times, even after the paintballing, do the world a favour.

    Guido, get some help, seriously.

  35. 35
    Regain Dave says:

    Dave here, sorry I mumbled and was shouted down in last week’s PMQ. I will try harder next time folks.

  36. 36

    The whole carbon market idea is a fraud anyway.

  37. 37
    Private Parts says:

    Guido, get a tape measure, measure the gut, post the figures on this site. It must be ballooning from the look of the neck and face, holy smoke!

    Get some self respect!.

    This is an intervention.

  38. 38
    Mike Naylor says:

    Hey Jilly, is this the new ‘softly softly’ subtle approach we were briefed on by our paymasters?

  39. 39
    Hugh Janus says:

    You seem to forget that the Tories are not in power and therefore not responsible for wrecking our economy.

    ‘Hate’ doesn’t even come anywhere near it.

  40. 40

    They want the U.K. to sink under the waves.

    Labour = U.K. Destruction.

  41. 41
    Regain Dave says:

    Betting site regulars now putting money on Labour landslide. What are they on about?

  42. 42
    Private Parts says:

    Massage space?

    Sounds minging.

  43. 43
    But what will be left afterwards ? says:

    Proves totally nothing.It just means that some people are still gullible after 12 years of disastrous mis-management of the economy by Brown & Co and local elections are not really indicative of a General Election result as “local” issues play a part inevitably and it could be that there is a very good Labour Councillor/candidate who has a proven record of dealing with people’s local concerns.

    When the General Election is called people will vote against Brown because he has ruined the UK Economy and sold us into debt for the next 30 years whilst refusing to be honest on the cuts and raised taxes he will have to make if he wins the election – irrespective of what they feel about local Councillors.It will a totally different ball game altogether in June 2010

  44. 44
    Regain Dave says:

    The Tories have been in power in the past with millions on the dole and leaking buildings in schools and hospitals. Labour have done wonders but they don’t know how to spread the news.

  45. 45
    thick as thieves says:

    private parts walked into a busy bar and ordered a drink.
    as he was being served he looked around the bustling pub and said to the landlord “I could have any woman I want in this place.”
    the landlord was slightly confused by this because PP looked like such a fucking ugly c’unt and stank of piss and so he asked “How do you manage that then?”
    “I’m a rapist.” replied private parts.

  46. 46
    Phil Spencer says:

    See the picture of the flat roof on his house – what is that thing behind the fake solar panels?

  47. 47
    Ronin says:

    I’ll work for the lib dems for minimum wage and party membership if they want.


    One of the top 50 internet trolls within the UK.

  48. 48
    Anonymous says:

    Before the ‘media luvvies’ get too excited, read the post again.

    Only those journos who ‘survive’ without getting any paint on them will be able to get the drinks which are offered AFTER the end of hostilities…

    That’ll keep the bar bill down a bit…

  49. 49
    thick as thieves says:

    liberal interventionism, what like blair the war criminal illegally invading Iraq?
    give it up PP.
    game over motherfucker.

  50. 50
    Susie says:

    Your caption competition was a preview of Mandelslime’s weapon of choice.

    Remember David Kelly’s words “I’ll probably be found dead in the woods…” Don’t go Guido.

  51. 51
    Beezley says:

    “Whom”, dear. Accusative case.

    “Wot’s that?” you cry. Ancient history, consigned thereto by that abominable, and thankfully dead, piece of excrement, A. Crosland. His disciples live on, however, led by none other than Mr Edward Bollocks, in whose sweaty hands the education lies of all those children whose luckless parents are financially or ideologically incapable of opting out — opting out, that is, of immersing them in the sewer that is the British state school system.

    Yet another Labour achievement; yet something else for you to be proud of, you soppy tart.

  52. 52
    oldfella says:

    I wouldn’t want to play with these people. But I’d be quite happy kicking their fucking heads in..

  53. 53
    Hugh Janus says:

    Oh my aching sides.

  54. 54
    TOO ME TOO YOU says:

    They don’t make them like they used to

  55. 55

    It will be in Viz next month. ‘paintballing’ will be a new euphamism.

  56. 56
    Beezley says:

    Fattist, as you would undoubtedly say.

    The man’s BMI is absofuckinglutely nothing to do with you.

  57. 57
    Private Parts says:

    Hello taat, still simply limply tossing out hackneyed insults.

    Guido needs help, his health is at stake, it would be wrong to stand to one side and say nothing.

    Even his magic mirror must be dropping a few hints.

  58. 58
    Hugh Janus says:

    Speaking of the Testicular One – did he not say a few weeks ago that he would save £2.5bn from the edukayshun budget? Why then is his wretched and ineffective department awared an increase?? He’s absolutely barking, and so is the Treasury for giving it to him.

  59. 59
    Anonymous says:

    The Lib Dems will be at home watching this instead..

  60. 60
    Private Parts says:

    Only as long as he stays out of television studios then the evidence demands someone do something, help him, before it is too late.

  61. 61
    thick as thieves says:

    ah, so having been exposed as a discriminating hypocrite you are now trying to change tack and make Guido’s weight a health issue.
    Guido’s health is not in question but your integrity is you dopey c’unt.
    you’re just a fucking idiot.
    this is too easy.

  62. 62
    thick as thieves says:

    it is too late for you private parts.
    and I would not help you even if it were not.
    game over man.
    face reality.

  63. 63
    pound for pound says:

    Go back to sleep you dopey slag.

  64. 64
    Craigoh says:

    Have to agree with Frank Fisher. (Are you PikeBishop, ex Graun’ commentator?)

    They’re treasonous filth.

    And I think that as a foreigner here (Kiwi expat), and FORMER Labour voter. Lord knows what true blue tories must think.

    (I’ve never voted Labour here; have voted for LibDems and Boris in Blighty, but used to plump for Lab’ back in NZ, back in the 90s as least worst option.)

  65. 65

    It’s all a massive sham…..Labour supporters and their ilk will spend the next few months saying how Labour are going to win, in the hope that by saying it loud and often, thick people will say, “oh well, everyone else on my fucking shit hole estate, who isn’t taking crack or mugging someone, is going to vote Labour, so i’d better had an all, don’t want to be left out, oh and labour support my right to be a lazy c*nt.”

    Fuck labour and all who sail in her !


  66. 66
    Private Parts says:

    Get Guido to face his face, tell him, quick!

    Lord only knows what is happening to the rest of the poor man.

  67. 67
    thick as thieves says:

    what are they on about?
    what are they ON more like, for fucks sake the c’unts must be out of their heads on crackcocaine if they are betting on labour.
    and you must be smacked out of your tiny brain on heroin to repeat such nonsense.
    a hung parliament is the best bet.
    it is the most likely outcome.

  68. 68
    ret butler says:

    Private Parts talking bollocks as per usual. No change there.

  69. 69
    thick as thieves says:

    only top boy has the right to call people slags here.
    get back in your box you silly fucking slag before you get a good slap.

  70. 70
    genghiz the kahn says:

    Jilly. You are the famous Gablle from and I claim my £10.

  71. 71
    Private Parts says:

    taat, this is genuine concern for another if it be inferior and deluded human being, have a look at him recently, it is not a pleasant site, he is expanding fast.
    Consider Mr Creosote

  72. 72
    proctologist says:

    Like your cock cheese in fact.

  73. 73
    Private Parts says:

    No that would be Guido.

  74. 74
    thick as thieves says:

    don’t start crying private parts.
    you have been beaten, take your beating like a man.
    unless you are a woman ofcourse.
    which would explain a lot.

  75. 75
    lucy says:

    Being fat trumps being a ginger сunt anytime, prick.

  76. 76
    proctologist says:

    No that would be you ginger minger.

  77. 77
    Private Parts says:

    Ranga is funnier.

  78. 78
    caesars wife says:

    I doubt you wil get too bruised Guido . Should be fun oh for the halsyon days of username “harriet” password “harman” !!

  79. 79
    The Beast of Clerkenwell says:

    Just look at the Libdems
    On one hand we have

    Ginger haired folk from the Shetlands who havent heard of the Labour party as they only speak Norwegian and lack any contact with the modern world that doesnt involve fish , carrier pigeons or a socal service investigation into satanic incest rituals
    On the other hand we have inbred cave dwellers from that bit of England that gave us the pasty and yet more incest and fish.
    Why do we tolerate these people?

  80. 80
    Private Parts says:

    Loo seat, really?

    Guido looks ill, seriously he looks ill. Have a look at a video from a few months ago it is piling on to him, really.

    Beer can pile it on for some people at a certain age, it is not too late but he needs serious help.

  81. 81
    The Frogs says:

    Brekekekek, ko-ax, ko-ax!

  82. 82
    Doc Trough says:

    Can’t you just lower the ‘nads into a gallon of emulsion, replace the lid and beat that bloody-handed c’unt Campbell to death with the tin?

  83. 83
    Mongrel says:

    Bet you’re not exactly George Clooney yourself, Mr Private Parts (is that a euphemism for Hoon?). Why don’t you post a photo of yourself, in or out of Nazi uniform like your chum Ed Private Parts, so we can all have a laugh?

  84. 84
    Private Parts says:

    taat at least that is an effort, praise where it is due, though it is not due on this occasion because it is so very very limp.

  85. 85
    Teacher Maria says:

    Actually it should be ‘who’ in this sentence .

  86. 86
    Mongrel says:

    He’s like a boozehound in a bar, buying drinks all round on credit, while the bailiffs are back at his house repossessing everything he owns.

  87. 87
    proctologist says:

    How would you know, you witless fuck?

  88. 88
    Sir William Waad says:

    You’re going to paint Balls? What colour?

  89. 89
    Care in the Community says:

    He’s not the only one.

  90. 90
    Beezley says:

    You’re wrong. Look it up, if you know how. Try Fowler.

    That’s the main problem these days — the teachers are themselves woefully ignorant. No wonder the poor little buggers can’t learn anything.

  91. 91
    thick as thieves says:

    said the crackcocaine addict.

  92. 92
    pound for pound says:

    Who rattled your cage butt monkey?

  93. 93
    thick as thieves says:

    not you care in the community, private parts is obviously the crack addict I was referring to.
    please give up the crack PP, stop using or you will soon be dead.
    actually, fill your boots you c’unt.
    maybe your crackdealer will extend you a line of credit?

  94. 94
    Private Parts says:

    It is called having a sense of humour, look it up.

  95. 95
    LibDems bitter here says:

    LibDem’s wife scratches Tory’s Volkswagen after he pips her man in poll

    When Valerie Davies’s husband was ousted from his seat as county councillor, the defeat must have smarted.

    But rather than vow to gain revenge through the ballot box, Mrs Davies took matters into her own hands.

    She vandalised rival councillor Geoff Martin’s car in a suspected revenge attack, causing nearly £1,000 worth of damage, it has emerged.

    Read more:

    Read more:

  96. 96
    Beezley says:

    >Are you PikeBishop, ex Graun’ commentator?

    He is, sir, the very same!

  97. 97
    thick as thieves says:

    take your own advice you dick.

  98. 98
    Mongrel says:

    You are right, they have done wonders. They have made £1 Trillion disappear with barely anything to show for it. If our area is anything to go by, they have spent it in hospitals that have subsequently been closed because of reorganisation, empty wards, scanners that never get used, accidental overpayment of GPs.
    As a tribal political animal, you can’t possibly understand the rage of people like me who have never voted Tory and who were quite happy to see Blair get a run at power in 1997, only to watch almost everything turn to shit in 12 years through ignorance, arrogance, and utter managerial incompetence.

  99. 99
    thick as thieves says:

    how about a nice shade of bilderberg grey.

  100. 100
    Private Parts says:

    Thanks for the kind thoughts, however Guido has an acute and pressing problem. It is mainly pressing the seams of his clothes.

    Someone, Help Guido!

  101. 101
    Private Parts says:

    Back off limply simply tossing.

  102. 102
    thick as thieves says:

    I would ask you to raise your game but that is ofcourse impossible for you to do.
    you might aswell just cut your losses and fuck off before you make an even bigger c’unt of yourself than you already have.

  103. 103
    thick as thieves says:

    get back to pound saver you fucking pikey c’unt.

  104. 104
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    Best double the 10,000 Spin Doctors that they already deploy in Government, and associated organs of Government.

    They might do better if their efforts are re-doubled. On the other hand it will be just business as normal. Crap management, and an awful strategy.

  105. 105
    proctologist says:

    “It is called having a sense of humour, look it up.”

    I certainly wouldn’t find you listed you ginger twat.

  106. 106
    lucy says:

    …said the window licker.

  107. 107
    thick as thieves says:

    what the fuck has your boyfriend mr creosote got to do with this?

  108. 108
    Private Parts says:

    Wind it in a bit turtle neck.

  109. 109
    Private Parts says:

    What is wrong, sprung a leak again?

    There, there, let the Fat Controller help you in to the siding.

  110. 110
    Mongrel says:

    Gu1do if you want to borrow a pair of ringers. my sons (aged 17) are pretty handy at paintball and would love to paste the crap out of politicians of either stripe. They could come in combat gear and face camouflage.

  111. 111
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    They are not people like me, Jilly!

    oh no no no no no!

  112. 112
    Emissions trades says:

    Europol comes up with these figures. Just goes to show that the European police force was a complete waste of time setting up, and ALL of them should be done for fraud against taxpayers,

    just like the British police, all Europol are good for is writing reports and responding to mindless diktats of their masters in Brussels.

    How many MEP’s are implicated in the emissions scam? We’ll never know because there are no receipts.

  113. 113
    Private Parts says:

    Mr Creosote = Guido, is it not?

  114. 114
    thick as thieves says:

    again, take your own advice.

  115. 115
    thick as thieves says:

    mr creosote = mr creosote.
    are you retarded?

  116. 116
    Engineer says:

    Leave Nads alone. She might be a bit mad, but she’s still the most gorgeous MP in the House.

    Beating Campbell to death with a tin of emulsion, or anything else come to that, is fine, however.

  117. 117
    Engineer says:

    Flourescent orange would be good. He’d be much more difficult to miss, then.

  118. 118

    The press release say anything about paints of mass destruction and having only 45mins to get to the venue?

  119. 119
    Engineer says:

    He’s waiting for his sock to dry again.

  120. 120
    shelling-out says:

    If Labout aren’t in power next year, it could put pressure on the government, whoever they are, as this money has now been pledged and will have to be paid.

    Things are going to get nasty……

  121. 121

    When trying to shift a big stinker of a post like that its best to spread it with a shovel.

  122. 122
    shelling-out says:

    The poor sod’s in Happisburgh are already fighting the sea.

    Not much government help for them, then.

  123. 123
    thick as thieves says:

    good thinking engineer. bilderberg orange it is!

  124. 124
    Rumpole says:

    The entire “Carbon” business is an entire scam and a ruse for money “manipulation”. All the energy on the planet, in whatever form, comes from the sun. The technology used to convert it from “sunlight” into other forms of energy is irrelevant. That energy hit the earth and that is where it is staying until the Earth explodes. or implodes or is sold off by Gordon to a passing Klingoff.

  125. 125
    Catflap says:

    If parliament rid itself of the Libdems and replaced them with a pet cat you would hardly notice the difference.
    Come and go as it pleases, answerable to no one,free food and lodgings. Prrrrrrrr

  126. 126
    Dodgy Dave says:

    It’s cos Ruin’s a Marxist cnut. His purpose is destruction.

    Since ww2 these creatures have infiltrated the west to the point they now control everything. McRuin’s the most destructive of them all, though…

  127. 127
    I know who you are says:

    said tat the ex CND member.

  128. 128
  129. 129
    Barry Obama, painter and decorator says:

    If Comrade Hundal is taking part I hope Guido smacks him in the gob.

  130. 130

    You do know who is going to pay for this, don’t you? Your children. You know, the ones you are busy preparing for life. The ones you are currently sacrificing everything for to make sure they can stand on their own two feet and be independent in life.

    Their dreams, their ambitions and their futures have been pissed up the fucking wall by a mere 646 people. An entire generation has been commited to little more than slavery to the State because of the excesses of yet another Labour Government. Whilst you toiled, they’ve been spending it faster than any of us could earn it. So fast, that your children, perhaps yet unborn, are going to have to pay for the rest of YOUR life, if not theirs.

    I’ve attacked the chavs, the bottom feeders, the welfare junkies before. This time I’m aiming at a different section of society.

    I want the heads of the middle classes on a fucking plate.

    What the fuck is wrong with our society that we can allow a Government the free reign to impoverish an entire generation? Yes, I’m talking to you in your three bed semi in Walsall, with a Mondeo on the drive, Radio 4 Womens Hour blaring out in the background and organic avacados in the fridge. Yes, you Hunts.

    Why did you do it? I know you voted Labour because that grinning cocktrumpet Cherie Blair and her snake oil salesman of a husband looked like “nice people” at the time. They are now multimillionaires and couldn’t give a flying fuck about you, your subsciption to the gym or little Chlamidyas extra maths lessons. They don’t care that the BMW needs a service and because the market for asset managers is a bit low at the moment, Keith, your boring husband is out of work.

    Do you think Jo Brand or Melvyn Bragg gives a shit? Do you think Marcus Bridgestock or Adam Boulton would even wipe you off their shoe? Do you think Harman or Blears feel the pain you do? DO THEY FUCK. They are on fully indexed pensions, fat on the excesses of Government/Media. Whilst you bite your nails to the quick dreading what the postman will bring in the morning. Chlamidya and Euphrates are not going to be lawyers. They are going to be highly taxed peasants, spending decades paying off what the 646 spent in a rush to the head, equality for all social FUCK UP of frankly monumental proportions.

    You’ve been had. More than that, you gambled your childrens future on 8 magic beans laid out in front of you by Tony Blair.

    Whilst you slept, ZanuLabour set about making sure that any rebellion by your children can be quickly quashed. So we now have political officers in schools looking out for dissent in four year olds. We have parents being forced to attend “councilling” by civil courts if the behaviour of their child is not compatable with “Government targets”

    Every civil Liberty taken from us in the last 12 years is now set to trample your children into the ideal fodder for yet more abuse from the 646. They are children born into slavery. Bonded labour if you wish.

    And you did it. The rush for Pavlova instead of pudding, the necessity for nail salons and the (unread) Observer on the coffee table to impress the guests has seen Britain sell not just its soul, but its children to the highest bidder.

    Look around the room. Find ONE THING the State does not regulate, control, tax or monitor. This has happened in a mere 100 years and we allowed it to happen. 646 Monsters took everything, absolutely everything from us, including our childrens futures. Their birth certificates are just Gilts to be sold to the highest bidders.

    We are the New Soviets. We must be truly insane. Now we are going to need a bloody revolution and our children are quite rightly going to ask how the hell it came to this.

  131. 131
    concrete pump says:

    You’re getting a bit fucked on tonight aren’t you PP.

    And rightly fucking so.

  132. 132
    talamunji says:

    Later the police ordered them to put them back.

  133. 133
    Brown Hater says:

    For the sake of regularity and the avoidance of any doubt whatsoever I hate Gordon Brown!

  134. 134
    Angry Englishman says:

    Mitchell and his wife appear to be on the payroll of Conservative Central Office. If he genuinely wrote this article, and meant it to be taken at face value, he must be raving bonkers. Jokes trying to imply eqiuvalenec between waterboarding and some mild criticism over his laughable “expenses” claims! “Doctor – you can take Mr Mitchell away now, he will be with us for quite a while”.

  135. 135
    thick as thieves says:

    nope, never been a member of the cnd.
    try again cripple.

  136. 136
    talamunji says:

    Preferably from lamp posts.

  137. 137
    Oxford Don says:

    Agree with Maria ‘who’ pronoun=what or which person or persons. ‘whom’ pronoun the objective case of who.

  138. 138
    The Admiral says:

    T%he3 only question is why did he stop there? Why not go the full £1.5 trillion?

    Hell it’s like eBay….

  139. 139
    The Admiral says:

    sorry, keyboard’s too small…

  140. 140
    tats on the ropes already says:

    A drunken salesman
    Your hearing damage
    Your mind is restless
    They say you’re getting better
    But you don’t feel any better

    Make an attempt at a bluff, without a pause for dutch courage next time and we might believe you.

  141. 141
    tats on the ropes already says:

    We are not playing poker dear, no need to bluff your way out of this round.

  142. 142
    Dodgy Dave says:

    Maybe Queenie (do not disturb) told him to hold back a bit!

  143. 143
    HASH GORDON (saviour of the universe) says:

    O/T Gordon McBust Has Been At It Again!
    He has pledged 1.5 Billion Over 3 Years into the climate change pot !
    MORE than anyone else !
    It is the right thing to do because of our colonial past !
    This Mental fucker still doesn’t get it
    when your country is broke you dont go throwing away money you dont have You thick useless twat !

  144. 144
    String 'em up! says:

    The figures banded about in relation to this climate change con-ference in Copenhagen, if implemented, will finally ring-in what these fuckers have been working towards now for so long, against the vast majority of people’s wishes: in-your-face, full-on, international Communism. Every single penny you make over and above the cost of a stale loaf of bread and half a gallon of paraffin for heating will be shipped off to Africa to be frittered away by the dark continent’s basket-case dictatorships. $65bn pa for 40 years equals penury for every single wage-earner in the West.
    Thank you all and good night, Vienna.

  145. 145
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    I just wonder where Brown is going to get this money, £100’s millions, for for the poorer countries for Climate Change?? We have borrowed 100’s of Billions …… for f8cks sake !! I recall him some time ago promising every black kid in Africa an education….. thats it, 2006 £8.5Billion Pppppppounds….. WTF !!!

    Methinks the Big Black African Leaders will be filling THEIR bank accounts !!!

    My money??? no way have I agreed to that lunacy………… !!!

  146. 146
    Dave "Cast Iron Guarantee" Cameron says:

    So I was sat with my best friend in the living room, when he nudged me and asked ‘Hey mate, do you prefer legs or breasts?’
    Now, being neither a legs nor a breasts man I replied ‘I prefer shaved fannies – why do you ask?’
    He stared at me in disgust for a minute before replying:

    ‘I don’t think that’s an option at KFC.’

  147. 147
  148. 148
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    Want to cut down the UK carbon footprint (bollocks) ??? Stop immigration …… simples !!

  149. 149
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    Dave, dave, dave…… is that the best you can do tonight ?????

  150. 150
    Brown Hatter says:

    For the avoidance of any doubt I, on the other hand, quite fancy him. And Mandy! Such a darling!

  151. 151
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    Mad Hatter????

  152. 152
    Climategate says:

    Lets study Mcdooms eco credentials.
    Bathed in the glow of a credit fueled consumer boom of imported cheap chinese shit.

  153. 153
    nell says:

    Don’t want to worry you Guido but those paintball thingies leave nasty bruises.

    Don’t suppose the labour team includes gordon, aintbustinagut or twatson does it? No? What a pity!!

  154. 154
    laughInearlycried says:

    Sounds as though he’s expecting to be ‘retired’ at the election-although he’s probably a national treasure oop there and will get away with it, just like two-banjoes

  155. 155
    canwekeephiminthiscondition says:

    He just doesn’t care anymore. He’s on the pills. He’s de-mob happy. It’ll all soon be over.
    Nurse, nurse

  156. 156
    Camels toe says:

    Fuck It, I would give up working.

  157. 157
    Mongrel says:

    Back to Blackbird Leys, Donald. Right explanation, wrong conclusion.
    According to my cheat sheet, your “objective case” is a conflation of accusative and dative. In this context – “who (m) do you hate” “you” is the subject and so the pronoun is accusative, so according to your explanation Maria is wrong.

  158. 158
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    The greedy barstewards……… they can flock fright off……

    EU climate cash pledge ‘not enough’ say small nations

  159. 159
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    No thanks from the miserable little flockers !!

    EU climate cash pledge ‘not enough’ say small nations

  160. 160
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    Let them eat cake !!!!

  161. 161
    Technomist says:

    Xmas cards from Blair and now painballing? Guido, you really are being sucked in. Next thing we know the real bloggers will be having to set up a Guido Watch site to see how many free drinks you have been getting from the hands you claim to be biting.

    Meanwhile, some actual news about the scumbags in Parliament:

  162. 162
    nell says:

    I rather thought he pledged it because he knew he wasn’t going to be in office when it was time to pay it and that cameron would pull it after he wins the next election.

    He thought, by pledging more than anybody else, it made him look big and important on the world stage.

    Bit like a kid in the playground saying ‘I’ve got more money than you’ sort of rubbish!!

  163. 163
    Mr Slater's Parrot says:

    SKKRR-RRRAWWKK!!! FIGHT! (bob) (flutter) A-AAAKK!! PUNCHUP!!! (squeetle)

  164. 164
    concrete pump says:

    Fucking hell OH !….don’t hold back.

    Great post.

  165. 165
    Piss In Their Begging Bowl says:

    Let the ungrateful fuckers starve.

  166. 166
    Mr Plum says:

    What a load of crap this is all turning out to be.

  167. 167

    I’d buy Swiss bank shares when the climate fraud money gets shipped to the ruling classes via Africa.

  168. 168
    sarah lavender brown says:

    nobody asked gordon to fuck the economy, he did it all by himself

  169. 169
  170. 170
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    Totally agree. Fabulous post. The terror surveillance of 4 year olds is really scary.

    We really need to be woken up to the facts:

    Airport Security. They don’t patrol the Airport perimeters that I am aware of.

    FFS most small arms at close range will be fatal to a Jumbo or A380 on take off. THey carry a very lot of AvGas.

  171. 171
    nell says:

    brown’s last fling!!

    Last week he said he would pledge £800million to the EU’s contribution towards the EU’s goal of £2.1billion for the climategate rubbish.

    They met this morning, they met that target and then brown inexplicably decided to up the stakes and say that Britain instead would contribute £1.5billion?

    Doesn’t that sound like a man high on something?

    Presumably he thinks this gobsmacking spending spree, after he’s already dug us deep into debt, is going to win him votes !!!!

  172. 172
    concrete pump says:

    @ TaT’s ‘special’ Gay Friend

    If your reading.

    Posts 65 and 67.

    Check the times.

    Cock knocker !

  173. 173
    Death 2 PC says:

    It’s racist to question these things doncha know.

  174. 174
    Gordon says:

    I’ll get back to you after i’ve printed a fresh billion or so.

  175. 175

    If you like Live Motorsports there’s nowhere better to live than BlackBird Leys.

  176. 176
    nell says:

    Interesting that the Fees Office allowed him to claim for Aquatic Plant Food but refused to allow him to claim for Shower Gel!!!

    Anybody know what sort of morons the HoC is employing in the Fees Office???

  177. 177
    Top doctor says:

    Well known as an SSRI side efect….profligate spending. With me it was my money

  178. 178
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    oh flock, I hope I do not get a knock on the door …….. hmmmmm probably not, Plod with be chasing speeders, ‘cos it is a crime in my area !!

  179. 179

    We, the people, have allowed them to steal EVERYTHING not just from us but from our children.

    I hang my head in absolute shame that 646 people could pull this off under our noses and we did NOTHING to stop them.

    My children will spend their lives taxed at close to 100%, in jobs supplied by the State.

    Welcome to East Germany

  180. 180
    Anonymous says:

    “Have you seen the latest local council results from this week? Labour taking seats from Tories all over the country”

    I presume you mean Weymouth. Don’t get your hopes up they are all on the dole down there so not surprising. Dumb fucks havent worked out yet it was Labour that put them there.

  181. 181
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    Ooh 2 computers how very novel. I have 3 here. But I don’t need to be a multi – personality. Dancing Queen.

  182. 182
    Agent 99 says:

    scorched earth and fuck it up as best he can for the Tories.

    He should be at the Old Bailey No 1 court for this

  183. 183
    I hate Brown more than anyone says:

    I do hope I dream tonight that Gordon Brown is murdered by some oddball (perhaps a poster on this very site?).

    I also hope that when I wake up tomorrow morning,the dream is not a dream – it is reality.

    That is how much I hate this vile c*unt.

    Only problem is,he would get the standard bollocks eulogies from the world and a hero’s funeral.

    Better to wait until he gets Election Death – but by god,if I ever meet this piece of dog excrement in the next 40 years of my life,I shall do my very best to kick the shit out of his ghastly body.

  184. 184
    The Sky is falling says:

    Tat sooner or later you are gonna have to come down of that fence and sate an opinion or two.

  185. 185
    Dodgy Dave says:

    OH. Yes, indeed. The middle classes were fooled by the deliberate credit explosion (and deliberate bust!). This is Marxist cultural subversion on a global scale. I fear for our and our children’s future. Could go on, but the debate is endless…

  186. 186
    Agent 99 says:

    Well said that man! one of the best posts I have ever read on here. I guess I am what passes for middle class (still work my nuts off though) but I have never ever, not once, voted Labour in anything.

    From my cold dead hand they would have to rip my vote


  187. 187
    Engineer says:

    Perhaps the Fees Office is working on the principle that he’s a vegetable. Allowing plant food but disallowing shower gel makes perfect sense.

  188. 188
    Susie says:

    Ironic really when most of the charts for the next couple of weeks replicate the start of the ’62/63 winter:

    and next week:

  189. 189
    streamfisher says:

    Brown brings the house down at Copenhagen banquet (best taken with a pinch of salt).

  190. 190
    JCB says:

    If the shovel dosen’t do it but maybe I can help

  191. 191
    Anonymous says:

    Maybe. But they HAVE worked out how weak and out of touch Cameron is.
    When he campaigns for Julie Kirkbride in Bromsgrove at the election, the whole world will have worked it out.

  192. 192
    Sod 'em all says:

    Cut your tax bill, lose 15lb of ugly fat, and help the environment!

    Here’s how:

    Cut off Gordon Brown’s head. Lay on one side. Pour boiling water through top earhole. Collect drained liquid via lower earhole (will be mixture of saturated fat, porridge and water). Evaporate off water, leaving fat and oats (residue of old deep-fried Mars bars and stale haggis). Heat resulting tallow and pour into cylindrical molds containing string wicks. Place solidified wax in candle-holders and light-up after dark.
    Donate empty skull with drooping jaw and hoary tongue still protruding to local neurological med-school of moronic diseases, or send to Africa for practice purposes to aspiring young black footballers.

  193. 193
    Van Helsing says:

    “Lib Dems not whining here”

    Must be the only place on the internet. I’ll stay for a while then.

  194. 194
    Obvious innit says:

    private parts = Master Bator

  195. 195
    Anonymous says:

    they mustave seen all about Julie Kirkbride`s birthday present for her brother freaky Ian Kirkbride – a rotating shaving mirror at £175 claimed on expenses.
    What has she got him for Christmas?

  196. 196
    Private Parts says:

    I really am a dumb fuckwit

  197. 197
    The Sky is falling says:

    Good post OH one though you forgot to mention that they can console themselves by buying little Chlamydia and Euphrates some designer custumes for their School Nativity Plays, oh wait its been cancelled this year something about not wanting to cause offence. Happy Winterval

  198. 198
    anon,anon,anon...... says:

    Dead isn’t he?

  199. 199
    Pedant says:

    Shirley that’s a side-effect of bipolar mood disorder, n’est pas?

  200. 200
    stilyagi_air_corps says:

    Thanks, OH, that was beautiful. you caught the *wu* there, baby!
    Is it me, or is everybody just… waiting for something, or someone, to happen?

  201. 201
    Private Parts says:

    I just would like everyone to know that I am a total fuckwitted dick wad and I really love Gu1do and dream about him every night

  202. 202
    The Sky is falling says:

    Looks like some Lunatic has escaped from No 10 !

  203. 203
    Our Media Correspondent says:

    Are they any good with live ammo? Guido, think about it!

  204. 204
    nell says:


    You do lighten my day!!

  205. 205
    Top Doctor says:

    Not Shirley, I shave.
    No not a ‘side-effect’ just one half of the ‘bi’. No charge

  206. 206
    - says:

    bollocks Old Holborn, you should be in pantomime in a big dress, anybody would think you like taking it up the arse from the left

  207. 207
    Reg511 says:

    Fantastic post OH

  208. 208
    Anonymous says:

    The reason for the LibDem absence is simple – how to explain the death of multiple Tory and Labour hacks at the lone hands of Paddy.

  209. 209
    Balls Bombs !!! says:

    Can anyone tell me when Balls id due to give another interview on the Radio or TV as his last one was such a fucking car crash ( 5 Live drivetime) that I cant wait for the next one.

  210. 210
    Mr Plum says:

    Could Brown have eaten too much beef in the eighties?
    Haven’t heard much about mad cow’s disease these days.
    It could explain a lot of things.

  211. 211
    nell says:

    I understand how you feel because I feel the same about gordon.

    But I also feel passionately that I want him to, just once, face a real election and face the result.

    Because there is no doubt in my mind that he will be resoundingly defeated.

    And I think such a defeat will be the biggest blow to his ego. He thinks he is the most loved PM of all time!

    I want to be there to see the moment he realises he is the most HATED PM of all time!!!!

  212. 212
    Agent 99 says:

    When all the cheques are called in, when Brown’s stuff hits the fan the monocular fruitloop will be far far away. It will be most likely Cameron and the Tories who will have to deal with this and an absolute horrific problem it will be.

    Meanwhile the likes of the ginger chipmunk will be blaming the Tories for all the disasters that are coming and will befall them make absolutely no mistake whatsoever as they negotiate all the booby traps laid for them over the previous administation. Labours actions previously and now are a crime against this country and its people but their supporters are so thick they cannot see it. They will of course next year when the cash dries up, the AAA is lost and the IMF knocks on the door. Oh yes its coming it really is and just in time for Pravda etc to ensure the Tories take all the blame.

    As Bolton said on SKY the chancellor did not come clean over the PBR and nor did the shadow chancellor. What the f*ck has this got to do with the Shadow chancellor. The foundations of blame already being put into place thats what.

  213. 213
    True Dave says:

    Yes mate, I`m in a bit of a rush. Having dinner with Julie Kirkbride and my closest adviser Andrew MacKay. I`ll try harder tomorrow.

    Bye for now luvvie.


  214. 214
    ADL says:

    Cohen? loves money. must be a fucking !

  215. 215
    Anonymous says:

    I understand John Prescott was going to the paintball but had a last minute change of plan. He has turned pro at snooker after hearing that the winner of the UK Championship wins his weight in pies.

  216. 216

    Resist. ALWAYS

    Use what little rights we still have to fuck them. Break their machine. Without us, it doesn’t work.

    If the most obedient and brainwashed people on the planet, the East Germans, can do it, so can we.

    Time is running out

  217. 217
    This is scary says:

    Listening to Any questions this evening. There is absolutely nothing in Principle for the voter to choose between the 3 main parties. They have a few issues but basically nothing will change whichever one wins.

    More frightingly all three of them 100% trust the science that global warming is man made and only man can cool the Earth down.

  218. 218
    Top Doctor says:

    Compared with Brown’s symptoms, Mad Cow’s is benign

  219. 219
    Anonymous says:


  220. 220
    Anonymous says:

    Buggers Nutters and Perverts – one party with three descriptions.

  221. 221
  222. 222
    Anonymous says:

    Should have added – the one thing which is not wearing thin is Dick Sniffin.

  223. 223
    nell says:

    Come to think of it Mr Plum – anyone heard of Swine Flu lately??!!

  224. 224
    Bromsgrove Man says:

    Its more likely that the LibDems will sort Kirkbride out in Bromsgrove.

  225. 225
    Engineer says:

    Paintballs are about the same size as meatballs, aren’t they? Fire meatballs instead of paintballs, and Prescott will be there like a shot….

  226. 226
    Ratsniffer says:

    You’ve got to watch those paint balls. I’ve heard tell of people being shot up the arse and shitting purple poo for a week.

  227. 227
    Anonymous says:

    Wekk done Dave! You certainly know how to tap the real experts. With Julie Kirkbride behind you, you are bound to romp home to a massive Tory landslide!

  228. 228
    nell says:

    Julie kirkbride is finished. She might choose to fight the next election but she absolutely cannot win it.

    She is living in lala land. 2010 is going to bring her into reality!!! Very much like that labour lass in lu’on!!!!

  229. 229
    Susie says:

    Caught by one of their own CCTV cameras too… there is a God.

  230. 230
    Carter Ruck says:

    Carter Ruck

    On the Day that Carter Ruck had to postpone their Kate and Gerry Mccann makeover in Potugal cuz the opposing Lawyer has swine Flu.

    Tiger Woods has now silenced the Brittish press.
    UK injunction granted over golfer Tiger Woods

    Is Carter Ruck acting for Tiger?

    For anyone a tad mystified, Carter Ruck recently tried to silence the British Parliament (and lost).

  231. 231
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    ” 4 Dec 09 – All this talk about the sea rising is nothing but a colossal scare story, says Swedish geologist and physicist Nils-Axel Mörner, formerly chairman of the INQUA International Commission on Sea Level Change.
    When running the International Commission on Sea Level Change, Mörner launched a special project on the Maldives, whose leaders have for 20 years been calling for vast sums of international aid to stave off disaster. Six times he and his expert team visited the islands, to confirm that the sea has not risen for half a century. Before announcing his findings, he offered to show the inhabitants a film explaining why they had nothing to worry about. The government refused to let it be shown.
    Similarly in Tuvalu, where local leaders have been calling for the inhabitants to be evacuated for 20 years, the sea has if anything dropped in recent decades.
If there is one scientist who knows more about sea levels than anyone else in the world it is the Swedish geologist and physicist Nils-Axel Mörner. His findings are based on “going into the field to observe what is actually happening in the real world”. . . ”

  232. 232
    Anonymous says:

    Cross-party co-operation? Why not just have one party – they all agree with each other!

  233. 233
    Private Parts says:

    Only having a laugh gals and guys I really am a total twat so don’t worry about what I say

  234. 234
    nell says:

    useless gordon’s doing that already.

    He just has never done anything so adventurous nor so courageous as facing a paintball challenge!!!!

  235. 235
    Mr Plum says:

    Heard something on the radio today, Scientists reckon it might not be a serious as first thought.

  236. 236
    these days are the great says:

    A time and place for everything

  237. 237
    Anonymous says:

    Nell, the choice should not be down to Julie Kirkbride. Dave should act now against this electoral liability

  238. 238
    Privates on Parade says:

    Don’t worry, we don’t.

  239. 239

    This is Post Modern Science. It’s what you feel is happening that’s more important than mere measurement. Especially if it means you can posture and exercise your hypocrisy and narcissism.

  240. 240
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    This is why the CRU, IPCC etc are shit scared of Steve McIntyre.

    His excellent first analysis of some of the emails tied in with historical context. Lots more to come.

    None of this is a smoking gun but the body of evidence is being built. I’m sure a ‘consensus’ will be reached soon.

  241. 241
    nell says:

    Wow!! Is that right.??

    Are they going to take the eight staff , dealing with swine flu here then, that they have in our local sports centre, and make them redundant???

    What a shame , they were part of gordon’s ‘real ‘ employent figures

  242. 242
    Glaswegian says:

    Excellent post.
    I am retired, but I listen to my well educated sons discuss current events in a passive way, unlike my rants about the current state of the nation.They, in common with their contemporaries lack the passion necessary to participate in a revolution.
    My generation has allowed our children to be conditioned by a liberal left establishment into a reflex of acceptance.
    Unlike my parents’ generation which suffered sacrifice due to the depression and the second world war, my generation was mollycoddled by a welfare state and free tertiary education into a state of benign indolence.
    We have idled away whilst the enemies of liberty have grown like a cancer into our body politic.
    Thatcher was a beacon of hope but she was brought down by the Euroliberal establishment.
    Perhaps a decade of hardship will make reform possible.

  243. 243
    Gurka the mercenary says:

    what is totally unacceptaple about the government is we can’t pay GBP 24m for the TA yet we can spend GBP 500n on the third world

    Our boys die in the stan

  244. 244

    It was a career move.

  245. 245
    Mongrel says:

    My point exactly, AC1. From the intellectual level of Don’s comments, it looks like the nearest he has been to Oxford is the infamous Leys.

  246. 246
    Engineer says:

    O/T, but I’ve just been listening to Clive James on climate science. He seems to talk more sense than some scientists on this issue. Transcript here:

    and the repeat is on Radio 4 at 8:50am on Sunday.

  247. 247
    Gurka the mercenary says:

    apologies the one eyed fucker has spent GBP 1500m

  248. 248
    Anonymous says:

    Quite Agree. I’ve been rowing out to my mored boat in an estuary from a permanent jetty for the last 20 years and the water level (Low or High water ) has not changed one bit (except for wind direction and barometric pressure).

  249. 249
    nell says:

    I suspect you are gordon’s new PR man. !!!!

    You aren’t going to do any better than the myriad of PR people that have gone before – but give it your best before you hit the dust!!!!

  250. 250

    Play away from home with a
    girl and then get her
    Naked and in bed taking all kinds
    Photos (allegedly) What
    Of it? I’m sure he said You’re a

  251. 251
    Engineer says:

    Ah, yes – the Trafigura affair.

    Seen somewhere – Woods is trying to suppress the publication of nude photos. Whether of him, or others, or him and others is not known.

  252. 252
    Engineer says:

    And that’s only the start. This damn conference lasts a few days yet…

  253. 253
    Agent 99 says:

    Fears are growing in parts of the cabinet that Gordon Brown is drifting towards a core vote strategy in a bid to be a player in a hung parliament. Some members think Labour will be forced back into its heartlands, and lose a swathe of swing voters.

  254. 254
    Tiger's lawyer says:

    If it wasn’t such an outrageous assault on our freedom of expression, this ban on ‘pictures that we’re not admitting exist’ would be just amusingly absurd.

    I presume co-conspirators will soon be circulating pics of ‘Cheetah’ Woods getting a few ‘holes in one’…

  255. 255
    Engineer says:

    Ouch. Bet that leaves a nasty taste in the back of the throat.

  256. 256
    Agent 99 says:

    I suppose this sort of thing only applies to people who go to Eton then?

    Brown resists pressure to sack defence minister over £20,000 bell tower invoice

  257. 257
    Engineer says:

    Don’t worry, nell, they’ll be redeployed to Diversity Management and Target Monitoring. But definitely not nursing, in case they catch something. Besides, those uniforms are expensive, and there is a financial crisis.

  258. 258
    nell says:

    Politics being what it is – worthless game!!!!

    I suspect he’ll take the low road of I’ll scratch your back etc etc …..

    gordon does exactly the same………………

  259. 259
    Mr Plum says:

    Could be a bit more than 1.5 Billion what with the interest on the loan

  260. 260
    Agent 99 says:

    PB.Com (Hat tip Mike Smithson) are reporting the folowing should be safe at a GE.

    What is really dissappointing is this seems like catching the perpe’traitors’ of the whole situation and getting them to a ‘Nuremberg type’ trial only for the jury to then pronounce them not guilty. They then set them free indicating they can carry on with their lives as before while millions of lives have been wrecked and destroyed because of their actions.

    The Safe Group

    Gordon Brown – KIRKCALDY & COWDENBEATH LAB MAJ 43.6%

    Harriet Harman – CAMBERWELL & PECKHAM LAB MAJ 42.83%

    David Miliband – SOUTH SHIELDS LAB MAJ 41.61%

    Andy Burnham – LEIGH LAB MAJ 38.73%

    Bob Ainsworth – COVENTRY NORTH EAST LAB 38.08%

    Hilary Benn – LEEDS CENTRAL LAB MAJ 37.98%

    Peter Hain – NEATH LAB MAJ 35.49%

    Douglas Alexander – PAISLEY & RENFREWSHIRE SOUTHLAB 34.95%

    Alan Johnson – HULL WEST & HESSLE LAB MAJ 34.06%

    Ed Miliband – DONCASTER NORTH LAB MAJ 31.85%

    Shaun Woodward – ST HELENS SOUTH LAB MAJ 26.76%

  261. 261
    restandbthankful says:

    It’s a bit late for Woods to silence the British press now that 9 cats are out of the bag.

  262. 262
    Anonymous says:

    Hole in 9?

  263. 263
    James Gordon Brown says:

    Hi I’m James Gordon Brown. You may not know me, but I have 12-billion pounds here that says you’ll vote for me regardless.

    Narrator: James Gordon Brown. Strength. Leadership. Vision.

    Oh, almost forgot! I’ve taken every drug known to man. And not just orally. Just gettin’ that out there.

    Narrator: Paid for by the people who gave James Gordon Brown 12-billion pounds

  264. 264
    Engineer says:

    You’ve got to hand it to the developing nations. They’ve managed to extract billions from the so-called developed world to tackle a problem that might not exist. Where do the world’s brains reside, these days?

  265. 265
    shelling-out says:

    You can always rely on Labour to give our hard-earned away to someone (anyone) else.

    He used our money to bail out the banks, he’s going to shaft us all tax-wise next year and now, he’s giving away money the country can ill-afford.

    No change there, then.

  266. 266
    MI6 says:

    Does it really matter who wins. We are all fucked any way. These Wankers have smashed everything to bits. Even the Chinese are doing a better job at running their economy. I mean what does that say about the West. Ah I forgot they aren’t running about the world smashing everything to bits that must be the trick if you want to fuck your economy.

  267. 267
    shelling-out says:

    Nah – that’s nowhere near painful enough.

  268. 268
    Craigoh says:

    Ta muchly :-)

  269. 269
    Bromsgrove says:

    What’s a gagging order?

  270. 270
    anon, anon, anon...... says:

    Bromsgrove folk don’t need to know

  271. 271
    INXS says:

    Suicide Grey.

  272. 272
    concrete pump says:

    It’s what happens when Mandy demands one of his subordinates to take his full 4″.

    Alistair Campbell springs to mind.

  273. 273
    Chapps says:

    Hey Beast,
    You are spot on ,have you noticed that Lib Dims allways have something wrong with them.
    There faces do not fit there heads!

  274. 274
    Down with Brown! says:

    I think Tiger needs a new PR agent.

  275. 275

    Let me put that into English

    One Thousand, Five Hundred MILLION pounds. Of OUR childrens money.

    On diamond encrusted Learjets for third world dictators

    No wonder they were queueing up at Nohopenhagen.


  276. 276
    Me Cheeah says:

    More of a Cheteah than a Tiger.

  277. 277

    Think the banks defrauded us?

    Wait till you see what “Carbon” fraud is going to cost us

  278. 278
    anon, anon, anon...... says:

    Mrs. Anon etc says it’s about time that female newscasters started wearing the veil……………starting with Fiona Bruce

  279. 279

    I’m not going down without a fight

    646 of them. 61,000,000 of us.

    Come on then…if you think you’re hard enough

  280. 280
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    Heres one for the greenies, Does this make you feel all good inside?
    Coppenhagen event bankrolled by Shell oil and British Pertroleum.
    Shell is one of the most CO2 intensive Companies on the planet.

    Shell Oil and British Petroleum express their vehement support for a global carbon tax in “Copenhagen Communiqué”

    The big irony behind top globalists descending on Copenhagen in luxury private jets and stretch limos is not just the fact that their own behavior completely contradicts their self-righteous hyperbole about CO2 emissions, but that their propaganda is vehemently supported by the very same big oil interests they accuse climate skeptics of pandering to.

    Probably one of the most flagrant examples of climate cronyism to emerge from the climategate scandal were emails in which CRU scientists, the body that provides much of the foundational global warming data for the UN IPCC, discuss how they conducted meetings with Shell Oil in order to enlist them as a “strategic partner” while getting them to bankroll pro-man made global warming research.

    The emails reveal that the CRU was also trying to get money from oil giants British Petroleum and Exxon-Mobil, under its former identity as Esso.

    “Now who is the shill for Big Oil again?” asks Anthony Watts. “Next time somebody brings up that ridiculous argument about skeptics, show them this.”

    A “Copenhagen Communiqué” put out by leaders of over 500 global corporations in advance of this week’s summit calls for drastic measures on behalf of developed countries to “de-carbonise their economies” – a move that would completely devastate living standards and lead to gargantuan levels of unemployment.

    The communiqué also demands that a global carbon tax be implemented via a carbon trading system. Bear in mind that the very people calling for such a system are the same people who will benefit from it to the tune of billions, as we shall explore later.

    The statement calls for, “Measures to deliver a robust global greenhouse gas emissions market in order to provide the most effective, efficient and equitable emission reductions. It would be comprised of a growing series of national or regional “cap-and-trade” markets linked together, in which the “caps” are brought down in line with the
    targets that have been adopted for emission reduction.”

    The document also states that CO2 emissions need to be reduced by a staggering 50-85% by 2050, a process that would return humanity to a near stone age level of development.

    And who are the radicals calling for such severe measures in the name of fighting the evil life giving gas that humans exhale and plants breathe? Greenpeace? Al Gore?

    Namely – James Smith, chairman of UK Shell Oil, Tony Hayward, Group Chief Executive, British Petroleum, along with hundreds of other global corporate giants, many of whom are directly tied in with big oil, and central banks who, far from bankrolling climate change skeptics, are directly invested in the scam of human-induced global warming.

    A common charge leveled against global warming skeptics is that they are on the payroll of transnational oil companies, when in fact the opposite is true, oil companies are amongst the biggest promoters of climate change propaganda, emphasized recently by Exxon Mobil’s call for a global carbon tax.

  281. 281
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    Yeah, you are all a bunch of right weekend hippies you dumbfucks!

    believe me, it gives me no pleasure to have been right all along, but what a bunch of sad fuckers you have all been!

    Save your arses and run, because you sold your dignity for the respect of hypoctites so long ago that you will never find the balls to fight back now!

    How very fucking SAD!

  282. 282
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:


    This was meant to have had a link.

  283. 283
    Anonymous says:

    C UNTS !

  284. 284
    Freddies Ghost says:

    Fucking ell lads Labour are getting both barrels this weekend

  285. 285
    Master Kan says:

    To suppress a truth is to give it force beyond endurance.RIP Carradine.

  286. 286
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    And as for thatcher, she was the real beginning of your complete brainwashing!

  287. 287
    davew says:

    Schillings are acting for Tiger Woods. Mr Justice Eady granted the injunction. It all adds up…

    Grauniad report:

    Copy of the claim filed by Schillings:

    “Confidential schedule: any photographs, footage or images taken or obtained of the Claimant naked or any naked parts of the Claimant’s body or of him involved in any sexual activity.”

  288. 288
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    Yeah, the money that you fucking idiots gave them, willingly, cos you were doing the ‘right thing’!

    Repectable, RESPECTABLE? REPECTABLE????????????????

    Now you are comletely fucked, aren’t you!

    Powerless, enslaved and just waking up as the ball is being attached to your chains!

    Sold your dignity for the respect of hypocrites and now, surprise, surprise you do not feel good about it!

    Well, what a fucking shock!

    Fucking weekend hippies!

  289. 289
  290. 290
    Brown Hater says:

    Looks good on his CV!

  291. 291
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    As i have written before, when you aspire to be middle class you volunteer to pay for EVERYTHING!

    the last time that I looked in a sociology book I was in the lowest class in the last line.

    The lowest in your fucked up society!

    But let’s face it, I am the smart one,


  292. 292
    Brown Hater says:

    You could paintball Brown’s Summerhouse and save us £500. It’s the right thing to do!

    I hate him!!

  293. 293
    Brown Hater says:

    He’s got the ex factor.

  294. 294
    Brown Hater says:

    I can tell him now; I f*cking hate him…

  295. 295
    Brown Hater says:

    Nah…wait till we get warmed up!

  296. 296
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    I finally understand how the Nazis got to kill 6, 000,000 jews.

    The signs were obvious, the smart fuckers left, even if they lost everything and the dumbarses kept saying:

    no, it cannot be true

    right up to the gas chamber doors!

  297. 297
    FFS says:

    Right off topic but…………………………..

    When, FFS, is someone going to pick up big time on that tosser Fondlebum’s comment about the Guards being ‘chinless wonders’? Perhaps he might think differently if it was cold steel rather than a Brazilian up his arse?

  298. 298
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    So how is the Brown Micra coping with the cold weather? S’pose you have to put the old free newspapers on the windshield at Night. De-Icer is so bad for the enviroment isn’t it? One day, if you post enough here, you might get your paymasters to let you borrow a Prius.
    Multiple personality freak show. Or a cynical attempt to put the Reef Fish off reading the comments? You really are a sad set of Beef Curtains, aren’t you?

  299. 299
    Brown Hater says:

    You just abouts said it all OH. Very good post!!

    I hate Brown.

  300. 300
    Brown Hater says:

    I feel a hate crime alert coming on…honest guv, it only Brown I hate. Apart from all things Labour of course.

  301. 301
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    TaT is really only ‘running interference’. So very little contribution for so very many posts. Of course there will always be certain elements that will try and appease the mincing tart with the polyp ridden white chocolate starfish.

    Senile old bastard with an Inferiority complex. Actually I don’t think that you have a Complex at all. You are simply Inferior.

  302. 302
    rick says:

    great post OH. Democracy – the god that failed.

  303. 303
  304. 304
    gov stats says:

    great post OH. Totally agree, I can could forgive a labour government for running up a deficit requiring repayment over the life of the next parliament. This is, after all, to be expected. But the next 30 years, I never saw that coming..

    Interesting to hear Peter Schiff podcast from yesterday, saying that essentially the UK is a socialist country (with the conservative party) – sadly I agree.. this country is finished.

  305. 305
    barefootcontessa says:

    Yes brilliant post OH! Creepy, that police stuff and photographers. Have a friend in Paris who was stopped recently in Paris because he was taking shots of buildings across the Seine. Police stopped him, said he was directing his camera at Carla Bruni’s appartment. His flat was raided next day, papers checked, and his friend’s and his photographs were confiscated……… serious case of paranoia?

  306. 306
    barefootcontessa says:

    Regain Dave, I think you’re needing treatment!

  307. 307
    barefootcontessa says:

    Says who? Who cares?

  308. 308
    barefootcontessa says:

    How can he be giving away money he hasn’t got?

  309. 309
    barefootcontessa says:

    And they’re not the only ones!

  310. 310
    barefootcontessa says:

    Trouble is, Clive James is senile.

  311. 311
    barefootcontessa says:

    he can even walk on water now Monsieur Sarkozy’s his new best friend.

  312. 312
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    Oh! By the way TaT, Concrete Pump, Mr Slaters parrot to name but a few of your preposterous posting identities. There will be a predictable demise for your rambling, abusive, woman hating, old sadact. The other reasonable, articulate, erudite, observant, and wide awake visitors and posters will overtime shun you.

    Pity that you don’t have a normal life, just a much abused sock.

  313. 313

    The Banks didn’t defraud us, but the Bond-Holders did.

  314. 314
    Losing my shirt says:

    The Greenshirts invade Copenhagen

  315. 315
    global fascism says:

  316. 316
    global fascism says:

  317. 317
    A Pensioner says:

    OH you hit the target. One correction theough: its wasn’t 646 bastards that did it, it was only a handful – Blair, Borown, Campbell, and Mandelson are the real criminals. The rest are lobby fodder.

  318. 318
    Lanchester Lad says:

    “Labour will ………………………..lose a swathe of swing voters.”

    I think if you look at the latest “Marginals Poll” they’ve already lost them. I can’t speak for the rest of the country but the West Midlands(over 24 Labour Marginals)where unemployment is the highest in England with job losses/business closures almost everyday,the marginals dotted around Birmingham Region are going to be a “blood bath” for Labour – it remains to be seen however whether the “minority parties” benefit or Conservatives as just as the Labour Government is being hit hard there is not that much appetite for “Dave & Co” either other than the desire to perhaps punish Brown for his perceived “mismanagement of the economy” and thereby deliver seats where Conservatives are close second to them at an election

  319. 319
    Archer Karcher says:

    Dismal Dave is hopeless.

    The worst government EVER, the worst Prime Minister EVER, the worst financial crisis and recession EVER, yet Dismal Dave is looking likely to struggle to beat them in any election.


    Because he is yet another phoney, like his hero Bliar and people can see it. All he wants is his time in the top job, the fact that it has been rendered down to the position of regional manager, does not bother him in the slightest. He knows that if he does as he is told, the reward from the people who really control events, will come.

  320. 320
    Archer Karcher says:

    That was DismalDave at his “finest”. Yes he really is that shit.

  321. 321
  322. 322
    Archer Karcher says:

    McMental plans on tying the next governments hands, by signing as many treaty committments as he can. The onrushing NWO, need to remove democratic choice by binding international treaty.

    McRuin is doing as he is instructed, the trouble is, it is increasingly clear that Dismal Dave will do the same.

  323. 323
    Archer Karcher says:

    McShit will soon have an EU sinecure, lavishly financed by the serfs of course. Oh and a title in the House of Lords, after all great statesmen like McRuin, should be rewarded for their sacrifice for the country.

  324. 324
    Archer Karcher says:

    Just think, every day you spend at work, you are funding some third world dictators, new jet, fleet of luxury cars, swiss bank accounts and holiday villas around the world.

    World fascism / communism has arrived.

  325. 325
    Archer Karcher says:

    I smell an ecoreligionist, keep drinking the Kool Aid.

  326. 326
    Cheetah says:

    Woods wins UK court ban against nude, sex photos

    British court order banning publication in Britain of any photos or video showing him nude or having sex.

  327. 327
    Orange Man says:

    Living on rations eh?

    Sack hime Dave, withdraw the party whip, he is a bad un.

    Then again isn’t Dave doing pretty much the same himself?

  328. 328
    Archer Karcher says:

    If this were a half competent government, Dismal Dave would be struggling to get 25% poll ratings. As it is he is up against probably the worst administration ever and could possibly only win with a tiny majority

    He has no real vision, offers no alternative other than, he is not McBraun and is quite content to be told what to do by unelected and unremovable masters.

    Dismal Dave is going to have, if elected, a very short honeymoon, before people realise that although he sloganeers change, in reality, his “change” is more of the same.

  329. 329
    Give_Away_Gorgon says:

    Until when can a leader who has not even won an election give away money that he has never worked for?

    His offer of more of our money at Copenhagen put me in mind of the famous Adams Family ‘charity auction’ film scene. Somebody should seriously consider having this loose cannon certified before his mad rampages put up the bill more.

    Do not forget that every household will be paying 257 pounds more to the Eu next year than this thanks to the volunteering of 2.3 billion more of British taxpayers cash in the so-called CAP non-subsidy deal, the final meeting of which was done specifically with Brown’s exclusion recently.

  330. 330

    It’s really the same technique any conman uses to get you deeper into the game; you invest a little, and you invest more to protect what little you have already put in.

    So we play the game, we go to school, we work hard, we start a family – we’re investing in this society, thei nation, we’re investing in their game. It’s very late in the day that we realise that the game we’re playing is enslaving us. When the majority of your working hours are put in to support *other people*, not you, nto your family, and you have *no fucking choice* about it, I reckon that’s slavery. We have consented to this. Of course, we didnt’ realise what it was we were consenting to, it’s a marvellous deception. It’s the most beautiful and elegantly constructed lie. We thought we were free. We thought the world was as it seemed. We thought we had an equal chance with everyone else. We thought the talk of dark millenia-old conspiracy was bilge, paranoid fantasy.

    Well we were fucking wrong. We’ve been played like twats, and now we find ourselves marching into a future in which we *know*, for a fucking fact, that every day they are gaining more power, we are losing more, and there isn’t a bloody thing we can do about it.

    Why not? Because all we can do is withdraw from the game – all we can do is break all the rules. And if we do that, we throw in our pot. We will have to sacrifice our jobs, homes, familes, liberty, our *reputations*, and perhaps our lives. And we’re not willing to do that, are we?

    We’re choosing safe slavery over dangerous liberty.

  331. 331
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    Yes, Frank, you are a bunch of


  332. 332
    Dave "Cast Iron Guarantee" Cameron says:

    Hello.Good Morning and Welcome

    What have my football team and my wife got in common?

    They both think they are too good to go down.

  333. 333
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    And I will tell you that


    is thrilling, exciting, no room for boredom and easier to FEEL the Infinite!

  334. 334
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    Getting better Dave…….

  335. 335
    Fees Office Clerk says:

    Bliar-Britton Interview WTF?

    Why not Bliar-Paxo or Bliar-Brillo or Bliar-Boulton or even [perish the thought] Bliar-Toenails?

  336. 336
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    That’s what Labour has done for us………f*ck all !!

    Politicizzzzed and neutralizzzzzed the Armed Services and Police.

    Bliar is now saying he would have gone into Iraq even if he knew there were no WMD !!

  337. 337
    BillyBob ... preparing for Gov't. says:

    How about a cutting edge interview by Richard (I’m an intellectual) Bacon ??

  338. 338
    The Admiral says:

    Qu “Cast Iron”

    Did you also write William Hague’s piece on Blair’s eu presidency in the HoC? That was beautiful.

  339. 339
    Mr Slater's Parrtot says:


  340. 340
    TheCourtOfPublicOpinion says:

    Jonas immaculate touch strikes again. The day after the new strategy to go for the tories on class, one of their own claims for a bell tower. Now that is class indeed…

  341. 341
    Harry Stophanes, comedian says:

    75 or 50 Ohm, sir? Strong enough to bear your own weight?
    Boom Boom!

  342. 342
    Old Nick Heavenly(real dimwit) says:

    extract from 42nd birthday poeim by lao ni ke ten (onh)

    And I have paid a small price,
    I made myself unacceptable to people who are ‘nice’.
    Even though they are intrigued and attracted
    people like myself are not easily accepted.
    I stand too tall,
    too square,
    a proud beggar.
    With nothing to loose,
    I am not easily swayed.
    I have one allegiance,
    my honour is staked upon it.
    An expensive commodity,

  343. 343
    Doc Trough says:

    Be better off putting a team on it. Say a panel of learned judges, counsels for the prosecution and defence, real time stream from the ICC studios, Den Haag and nobody leaves till all questions are answered. That’s a proper show.

  344. 344
    Eldrick says:

    Eldrick Tont? No wonder he likes to be called Tiger.

    I guess one of the UK Sunday Papers was about to publish the photos.

  345. 345
    Dodgy Dave says:

    Well said Lord Monckton! Slaughter the Hitler yuf, before they do more damage.

  346. 346
    A Discerning Reader says:

    TaT’s ‘special’ Gay Friend is really only ‘running interference’. So very little contribution for so very many posts. Of course there will never be any elements who will try and appease the mincing tart with the polyp ridden white chocolate starfish.

    Senile old bastard with an Inferiority complex. Actually I don’t think that he has a Complex at all. He is simply Inferior to top boy.

  347. 347
    thick as thieves says:

    get your fucking act together you titfuck.
    have you got alzheimer’s?

  348. 348
    thick as thieves says:

    said the old nagging spinster.

  349. 349
    thick as thieves says:

    I we reading the same blog?
    are you on acid?

  350. 350
    Airey Belvoir says:

    Careful Guido, they can hardly miss!

  351. 351
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    Tertiary Education and a meaningful life would have helped!

    Is that paraffin heater keeping you warm enough? Think you should have upgraded to that Super Ser all those years ago. Won’t the paraffin scent that trusty sock?

  352. 352
    Airey Belvoir says:

    So we won’t be seeing any photos of his Tont then…..

  353. 353
    TaT's 'special' Gay Friend says:

    All that time to kill, because you are so lonely TaT. And so very dead inside.

    OK so you can’t wash and polish the Micra at the moment. But at least hoover it out occasionally.

  354. 354
    stilyagi_air_corps says:

    ‘Ang on. ‘ang on! Some of those Sromarli Pirates might’ve been affiliate UNISON members! ‘Ad tew check wiv Central Orofice before lettin’ orf hany of them dangerous frierarm thingies nearby… We doe ‘ave Elf urn Safftey regulations in this country, you know!

    True disgrace. Then again, this administration does have form when it comes to bottling out of risky hostage situations – they could have attempted to rescue that chap held in Mali, too, had it not been for cold ministerial feet. Then Gordon fucked up by sending a squad in to rescue a Brit who was about to be released anyway. Killed a soldier and an interpreter with nano-management.

    They don’t exactly put a spring in your step, this government, do they? Every day, more shame.

  355. 355
    Anonymous says:

    Cud it be a picture of Tiger and his Wood ?

  356. 356
    anonymous says:

    Brown will die very soon.

  357. 357
    Flat Eartther says:

    I will be probably have died of old age before giving that shite house a good pasting in fact I would probably still be somewhere at the rear of a queue numbering millions.
    I personally would not wish ill of anyone but willingly make an exception with this scumbag when you think of the enormous fuck up he has made of the economy and the colossal debt facing the next generation because of one man’s insane obssession to deliberately overspend a nations budget year, after year, after year.

  358. 358
    Nick2 says:

    Looks like the injunction was obtained by another law firm…

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Rising Stars
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Alan Milburn says Labour’s scaremongering campaign for an unreformed NHS will not win election…

“It would be a fatal mistake, in my view, for Labour to go into this election looking as though it is the party that would better resource the National Health Service but not necessarily put its foot to the floor when it comes to reforming. Look, reforms are not easy, but the Labour Party is not a conservative party. It should be about moving things forward not preserving them in aspic. You have got a pale imitation actually of the 1992 general election campaign, and maybe it will have the same outcome. I don’t know.”

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