Conference Speech Advice to Brown from Blair
Well Labour is in third place in the polls, with Brown having failed to take the Tory lead apart. Blair’s advice from his valedictory conference speech was quite clear…
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Lord Lamont told ITV News…
“I think the PM is just human and Ed Balls is a pretty irritating person”
one lyer to another fuckers should be hung
Polling worse than Kinnock?
If Gordon was not suicidal before then he must be now.
Looking on the bright side for gordon, people always speak well of the dead.
Steady there: Gordano hasn’t done his afternoon speech, yet…
Brown’s biographer has just told Sky that Brown’s inner circle say that Gordon is Looking amazingly upbeat this afternoon! Looks like He has been popping the pills again.
If the Brown skid-mark is looking upbeat, it’s a sure sign that he is about the announce another wizard scheme to trash something new or to shaft the population in yet another splendid way.
There has to be a brace of doctors who could get this fool sectioned – pretty please !
Shall I start a whip-around ? perhaps BUPA can do it for a shilling or two?
Leave Brown’s inner circle to me.
I very much look forward to speaking well of him!
Maybe he’s planning a Massada type finish with all the remaining faithful on Ben Nevis. Or perhaps a Jim Jones style get together at No 10.
More Punch anyone? A bit more orangeade? Jack? Harriet? There’s plenty for everyone.
gord says “the pink ones are very good” and tomorrow “you dont feel bad “
Hanged.
But if they are left hanging for sometime then they are hung out.
Life under Labour
Down With The Nanny State
(The views of a grumpy old man)
I am now of the opinion, that the nanny state thinks we are fools
I have seen our society changing, I am staggered by some of the rules
No longer do we have the freedom to take risks after weighing the odds
When having considered the chances, put our fate in the lap of the gods
Banned are the daredevil heroes of which our great nation was proud
Adventure, thrill, exhilaration are simply no longer allowed
Today it’s all stresses and traumas caused by the slightest mishap
Not by bombs, poverty or starvation but by insignificant crap
We must not get upset or worried or ever receive reprimand
Our lives must be like Mary Poppins or we will be mentally harmed
Yet before councillors were invented and you were confronted with strife
You didn’t start whinging and whining you simply got on with your life
Now it seems kids can’t play conkers, at school unless wearing specs
And firemen’s poles are a hazard, I wonder what they’ll think of next
All workers now have to have footwear that has steel built into the toes
Plus high visibility jackets worn over their normal work clothes
What with PC and human rights rubbish and constant advice on our food
We should tell all do-gooders to “Stuff it” up somewhere decidedly rude
How do they think we all managed before all this twaddle arrived
Through wars, poverty, depravation a hell of a lot still survived
Nobody made a commotion if a schoolteacher gave you the cane
It was considered unmanly if you couldn’t cope with the pain
Villains broke rocks up on Dartmoor and murderers paid with their lives
Fisticuffs settled a dispute for only a coward used knives
Hooligans given a birching, till their backsides were blooded and sore
It’s hard to look tough when you’re crying so very few went back for more
So don’t patronise me with this drivel, my generations not dense
We have learned how to roll with life’s punches by just using sound common sense
If we could just gaze in a crystal and the next fifty years we could glimpse
Then I for one feel pretty certain we will then have a nation of wimps
None of us need to be coddled, we don’t need it all on a plate
Let’s stand up to all these busybodies and jettison the nanny state
The result of this do-gooder nonsense is not very hard to detect
By the loss of respect for each other and virtually no self respect
Gone are the days of the nit-nurse, and gone is the headmasters cane
Is society better off for it? well, perhaps we should all think again
INVADE IRAN AND KILL ALL THE ARABS!
DIRTY ARABS BLOW THEM UP DROP BOMBS ON THEIR WEDDINGS
TORTURE THEM
YEEEHA!
Iranians are Persians not Arabs
Well the people that believe all the BS about Iran’s nuclear program (politicians and mainstream media) have the IQ of a rather backwards sheep. They would not know the difference between an Arab and a Persian.
They also do not seem to know the difference between uranium enrichment of 5% and 95% (and that is down to the type of centrifuge, NOT the amount of them) Nor do they understand the difference between sticking to the letter of the IAEA treaty and sticking two fingers up to the UN, the IAEA and telling them to fuck themselves. Nor do they know the difference between building a massive stockpile of nuclear weapony and being in a position to have your secret security services proliferate it to anyone who can attack the west (for your benefit) and not having nuclear weapons at all.
to clear up any doubt, the IAEA have repeatedly asked to inspect Israel’s nuclear facilities and their nuclear weapons, but have been told by Israel to go fuck-themselves. Israel are NOT a signitory of the NNPT and can do what they damn-well please and that is with Obama’s blessing.
The US vetoed the attempt to have Israel sign the NNPT. It seems when Barak Obama stated last week that ALL nations must abide by the rules of the international community, he really meant ALL bar the one that actually isn’t. ironically, if one studies the relevent clauses of the NNPT, Iran have been in total compliance with their obligations under the NNPT all along. They are in breach of the UN security council resolutions, but then so are Israel, so they must be voluntary.
Or could the same people behind the same powers that lied us into the illegal and immoral and evil Iraq war, be trying to do the exact same thing again with Iran???
Yeah right.
why do you need the multiple layers of SAM’s and other short range air defence assets around peaceful nuclear power development sites? The places are fucking crawling with them, they’re in the middle of fucking nowhere and there is no credible air threat around them at all for thousands of miles until you get to Israel.
The fuckers are developing the bomb, they know it, we know it and they know we know it. What the fuck is the point of developing a MRBM or longer range ballistic missile if you’re not going to put a worthwhile fucking warhead on it?
Hopefully The Israelis will solve the problem that starts with I and ends with Slam.
Matter of time
Islam can rot in hell for all eternity.
Given that Israel consistently threatens to bomb the irainian nuclear sites, it would seem a sensible precaution to put in some defences. The site may or may not be peacful, either way it is under constant threat of attack.
hey, israel can and does do what it likes.
but if they attack iran then iran will pop a couple of missiles off at israel and iran will target israel’s nuclear missile silos.
forget the promised land, it will be the cursed land then.
and so israel will not attack iran and anti social citizen is just spouting hot air.
as usual.
dick is just a prick too.
Very well said Mr. Ned(I didn’t realise I was a poet).
I seem to remember that Israel are in contravention of 45-50 UN resolutions but get away with it due to the support by the USA.
Am I cynical to suggest that it might be due to the money that is pledged by Jews in the USA to the ruling parties???
No, you’re not cynical – it’s just a fact of life. Also, complete control of the mainstream media helps.
tha jooooooooz control everything
nice mr alex jones told me so
5% uranium is what you need to make plutonium isnt it?
Good point, Mr. Ned. The hypocrisy and double-standards are simply nauseating.
As for Iran, I have no idea if they’re building nuclear missiles or not, but maybe they wouldn’t have embarked on such a costly program if they hadn’t felt suffiiently threatened by their ever-belicose, nuclear-armed neighbour, Israel.
WHO GIVES A FUCK WHAT THEY ARE JUST BOMB THEM
AND ANYWAY, ALL THE ARABAS LOOK THE SAME TO ME
WE MUST KILL THEM ALL AND THEIR CHILDREN LIKE HEROD DID
OR THE STREETS OF BRITAIN WILL NEVER BE SAFE
VOTE LABOUR VOTE WAR
WE WILL INVADE IRAN
STOP BEING SUCH A LILLY LIVERED COWARD WITH YOUR PRECISE DEFINITIONS
THE ONLY GOOD ARAB IS A DEAD ARAB
WE MUST BOMB THEIR WEDDINGS TO STOP THEM BREEDING
DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND?
“WHO GIVES A FUCK WHAT THEY ARE JUST BOMB THEM”
At last, I agree with you on something.
And Persians are about the oldest civilization, and have lovely pussies (says Mrs Slocombe). ^ ^
Right, who leaked the Operation ‘Bomb Iran back to the Stone Age’ file.
Do you need to do anything?
Culturally they’re already there.
as are you, intellectually speaking.
I blame the teachers
I blame Margaret Thatcher
I don’t.
it’s te single Malts that done it
Anyway looks like prezza was right labour might go fourth
“If we can’t take this lot apart in the next two years, we shouldn’t be in the business of politics at all.”
going mental says:
September 29, 2009 at 1:17 pm
Anyway looks like prezza was right labour might go fourth
missing words ‘and multiply.’
They did in the European elections.
He’s such a tease
It started in America
Sorry – don’t have new fangled speakers – what is the idiot saying?
“If we can’t take this lot apart in the next two years, we shouldn’t be in the business of politics at all.”
Something about if they can’t take that path, then they shouldn’t be in the business of politics at all.
thanks 15, i just caught the last part…. I was getting too exicted there
He’s tellng Gordon that he is useless and should fuck off.
He’s saying “Gordon, you took a hospital pass once when you were playing rugby….well here’s another.”
Iran is not an arabic country. Moslem and arabs are not the same.
That should be Persian and Arab. There are a lot of Christians in Iran, as well as moslems.
And despite what the western media reports, there is a thriving Jewish community in Iran too.
Mossad?
In a mass grave 45 miles south of Qom.
Who I delieve declined the invitation to move to Israel
Plenty of ‘em in Damascus too if I remember rightly.
Can’t we kill them all on flimsy evidence anyway?
So, let meget this right, you just want me to make these corrections you’ve writen here in red and then type it out on official notepaper Mr Blair?
Gosh. Wait until I tell my mum I did some typing for the PM.
LOL
“Sure Tony (and Gordon my friend). Do whatever you want. Attorneys General are very accommodating. Which is why we expect to be treated with kid gloves. I scratch your back you scratch mine.”
Where is Baroness Scotland of Tonga? Is she at conference or confined to barracks?
Is he drawing a line in the sand, as per UN speech, over Iran?
Loved this from the Comment section on Toenails blog.
23. At 10:29am on 29 Sep 2009, Mister_E_Man wrote:
I can’t even imagine the strength of the medication required should Brown somehow end up doing this debate… do anti-depressants come in elephant doses?
Own up – who was it? Subervise far right blogospere extremists
Wasn’t me. I always spell anti-depressents wrong.
There’s a pill for that.
You’d probably move him up to ACP, which is a horse tranquiliser. ( Frequently used in small doses by your loveable local Irish dealer, to take the edge off that difficult customer, before palming the beast off to some unsuspecting punter !)
I think vets sometimes use it to commit suicide, so it would be appropriate under the circumstances and when people are as useless with figures as these nulab cnuts, there is always a sporting chance they’ll get the dosage wrong.
Isn’t that rohipnol? The uglier gentleman’s ‘ice-breaker’.
I’m feeling depressed about the economy being in a depression.
And the weather
funny brown we are fucking depressed cause your a lying hoon
take some more of those sweeties, you’ll be fine
He could blow his brains out!
Would plod let him have a shotgun licence?
Pea shooter fashioned from a biro should be more than sufficient
Layers of expanded polystyrene and wood chip to penetrate.
Aiming difficulties…
As of next year, Gordon Brown won’t be in politics (at least not in any meaningful way). Seriously, if he wins his own seat and Labour suffer a landslide loss, what’s he going to do? You can’t imagine him working hard fro his constituents form the back benches.
Rise up, English people, and address the unfairness of the “Scottish arrangement”!
Yep, labour in 3rd place, but don’t rule out a hung parliament helped by a clever move by labour to trick the libdems into backing a referendum on electoral reform.
Milli the labour manifestor writer is now on the record for having said there is something to be said for the call for elctoral reform towards alternative vote.
This will be a huge headache for conservs, as will postal votes
After Blair reneged on PR surely the Lib Dems are not so fucking stupid to get conned again?
Actually… they probably are.
As will be the B&P be a headache, to all the tossers currently infesting parliament.
O/T England put into bat against New Zealend
and lose strauss 2nd ball
Good luck to England today
There was no need for that.
init just won 3 on the trot and he had to spoil it
It started in New Zealand
South Africa
I wish they weren’t in this business at all……
Jack Straw on BBC Parliament at the moment……… he’s clearly been on Gordon’s happy pills cos he thinks Labour have been doing a good job and deserve a chance for more………..
…….. I feel nauseous. Anyone know where my local lynch mob will be forming (Hampshire)?
They’ll be celebrating in the streets of Raith
that would require micro surgery.. not a gun
With the speech coming up soon, I reckon there’s more than one drip in gordo’s room. What if he starts moonwalking?
He’ll announce that he will be taking part in the leadership discussion on Sky then pull out at the last minute with a motte in his good eye.
Guido – you really need to give us a transcript for this sort of thing. Sitting in the middle of the office with T Bliar blasting out of my pc speakers is liable to get me sacked/lynched/sectioned/executed – delete as appropriate….
Mr Fawkes, can you provide us with an insight into how all these party coneferences, the travel, the hotels the pints and the absence from the regular job (if you can call it that) are paid for/accounted for:
-how much taxpayer money, either directly or covertly through paying for travel, hotel and food expenses
-conference venue, incl all the security (who kept bystanders out of the backgroud for that staged phote of Brown climbing the stais with the missus?)
-all the absence from the regular job (do delegates etc not in parliament need to take days off?)
-all the fringe events, do parties need to report on the amount that is sponsored by companies, newspapers, unions etc.
I very luckily hardly pay tax in the UK (as I’ve left the UK, I’m not cashflow-poor), but for what I will have to pay still I do want to know whether I’m cosponsoring all this grandstanding.
To precis:
“if we can’t see that lot off (the Tories) in the next 4 years, we don’t deserve to be in politics”
In short then, Labour don’t deserve to be in politics. Goodbye.
You have to give tony his due. He does a good speech and he makes lies into believable truths.
Guido,
how about a liveblog for the Mental one’s speech?
Could be fun shouting tractor stats every two minutes.
Maybe i’m just missing PMQs!
It is up now,
Top man!
Right wing subversive
“Whenever and wherever there is anti-social behaviour, we will be there to fight it,”
Except in the case of the Pilkington family.
“We will not stand by and see the lives of the lawful majority disrupted by the behaviour of the lawless minority.”
Except in the case of the Pilkington family. Except in the case of Baroness Scotland and everything else the lawless New Labour minority do to exploit and abuse the lawful majority.
Resist them.
And of course not in the case of their own behaviour which is perfectly defined as anti-social and lawless.
You heard our Leaders proclimation from the Bunker – resist Labour!
Don’t we think that the Labour Party is the epitomy of “anti-social behaviour” ?
What benefits have the public seen under this shower of shite ?
All they ever do is lie, decieve and pull bait & switch stunts while their talentless moronic followers dream up more ways of taxing anything and everything under the sun.
- Not to mention the rambos in drag who “police” legitimate protest meetings by beating the shit out of anyone who is within battering distance.
Can’t wait to hear how many crack-downs Gormless is going to launch, how magnificent Liebour’s fight-back is going to be, how deeply caring Gordon is, how brilliant he and Alistair have been in saving the World from economic calamity, how many hard-working families will be destroyed if/when Labour lose the next Election,where Gordoom’s moral compass is pointing now,how many ‘British jobs’ have been saved because of the car scrappage scheme….
Fcuk me, Gordon. Pass me some of your anti-depressants, please…
Look away now if mingers make you nauseous
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1216878/The-moment-Labour-MP-turned-BBCs-Andrew-Marr-Browns-prescription-pills-questions.html
My god, have you *seen* the trash filling the seats down in Brighton? Did they offer free meths to anyone who’d come in?
what a shower of shit, eh?
it’s like a crackheads anonymous meeting FFS.
Yea I thought I saw that old slime ball Vaz!
The stench of stale piss and BO must be almost unbearable. Good thing Brighton’s on the coast so the stink should clear quite quickly over the weekend thanks to the sea breeze. Watch out for Brown dribbling. And sweating. Plus some involuntary flatulence.
Barbara Streisand is rumoured to introduce him this year, better have some more of those happy pills “to help you through”
Happy Days Are Here Again
So long sad times
Go long bad times
We are rid of you at last
Howdy gay times
Cloudy gray times
You are now a thing of the past
Happy days are here again
The skies above are clear again
So let’s sing a song of cheer again
Happy days are here again
I reckon that Screaming Lord Such was a ringer,(bless Him)
The Labour Party is the true and genuine “Monster Raving Loony Party”
- Accept no substitutes !
My advice to Gordo: book yourself into the Priory son
http://newslion.blogspot.com/
Keith vaz on my telly – GET OFF YOU HOON!
Mwah, mwah !!
An industrial-strength degreaser such as 2-Ethoxyethanol should see your telly all right again.
Topical (not).
Brillo doing a good job right now straightening out some Labour knobhead on his hopeless economics!
Sarah’s been gushing.
In truth, he ain’t done bad job.
Cameron’s going have to up his game a tad.
Re. Blair and the “Business of Politics”, ZanuLab is not the type of business in which any sane person would invest (and that is not just on ethical grounds).
Labour’s internal finances are as catastrophic as the UK Treasury’s
Labour’s Support is Evaporating
2009 doesn’t look to be going much better than 2008.
This time next year, Labour will be facing extinction, and, having sold out its traditional supporters and then completely fucked its new ones, this will be richly deserved.
By gathering around Brown as he throws off his unconvincing attempt to disguise his “Class War” tendencies, this lame, wimpish Cabinet has now ensured that the end will be predictable and, rather satisfyingly, almost entirely self-inflicted.
Re. Blair and the “Business of Politics”, ZanuLab is not the type of business in which any sane person would invest (and that is not just on ethical grounds).
Labour’s internal finances are as catastrophic as the UK Treasury’s
Labour’s Support is Evaporating
2009 doesn’t look to be going much better than 2008.
This time next year, Labour will be facing extinction, and, having sold out its traditional supporters and then completely fucked its new ones, this will be richly deserved.
By gathering around Brown as he throws off his unconvincing attempt to disguise his “Class War” tendencies, this lame, wimpish Cabinet has now ensured that the end will be predictable and, rather satisfyingly, almost entirely self-inflicted.
Sorry… forgot to say great post – can’t wait to read your next one!
For an opportunity change your thinking about public sector services and to have the greatest challenge to your thinking for free, book your session with John Seddon at the conservative party conference
http://conservativerealreform.eventbrite.com/