June 19th, 2009

Another Gordon Press Adviser Exits

The FT has it “on good authority that John Woodcock, one of Brown’s two spokesmen, is to quit; the move could come soon.” He is after his old boss Hutton’s seat.  Now is he the one who, post McBride, went round telling the Lobby that he would have Guido for breakfast or was it the other one, Michael Dugher?

They come and go so fast in Downing Street nowadays you barely have time to get them in your crosshairs…


474 Comments

  1. 1
    Cardinal Richelieu's mole says:

    Time may be bare but obligation remains ample, of course! :-)

    • 3

      was he the times cricket correspondent?

      • 30
        going down the pan says:

        another rat slides down the anchor chain !

        • 40
          Scallywag says:

          These rats can slide up chains as well…

        • 206
          Scotland's Coming Home says:

          They’ll have Clarence back soon.

        • 286
          Anon. says:

          Scotland’s Coming Home – Not Clarence “Maddy” Mitchell surely?

          He’s still wondering what to do with a rather smelly package stuck at the bottom of his chest freezer.

    • 85
      Wossat? says:

      These are all junior rats and of little consequence. When’s the the big fat one skulking in Number 10 going to jump? If no one else has the guts to stuff a generous dose of rat bait down his lying throat I want to volunteer for the job…

    • 88
      Flying Scot says:

      FFS watching BBC TV i know i know John Mann and Theresa May try to talk sense about REDACTING – on the we will let you see the truth on expenses info

      A TRUE Classic – John Mann someone who i have got lots of time for says about The BIG BLACK CENSORSHIP

      ” if Parliament had not been as conservative” and Theresa May “jumps in this is not about party politics” FFS they as so far up their own arses they dont know how to be honest and they dont understand the English language – Conservative Definition: One who desires to maintain existing institutions and customs opposed to revolutionary or the radical.

      Read Carefully Theresa NOT FUCKING TROUGHING TORIES

      Printers all around the world are running out of Black Ink :-(

      • 103
        Bath plugs for the many, not the few says:

        In the interests of total transparency, I should tell you that █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ ██ ██ ██.

        • 138
          where did my job go? says:

          You are giving a little too much away for Gordo’s liking….

        • 184
          I hate the corruption under Labour says:

          Very funny!

        • 366
          Master Baiter says:

          Jeremy Hunt MP (Con) 1p for phone call, classy.

        • 385
          Class Action says:

          John Bercow – £1200 to replace a bog broken by a Tampax. Not at all classy.

        • 403
          Trough Mixture says:

          Bercow shoyld get imself seen to if he’s suffering ‘the curse’.

        • 467
          Anonymous says:

          Denis MacShane doesn’t mind you seeing what items he buys fromStaples when said items are Toner/Fax paper /Folders but when he buys something at £1,276 from Currys everthing is blanked out (sorry Redacted sounds so much better.

          Also 4 computers and 4 digital cameras over 2 years. WTF

          Also £500+ paid to Yorkshire Water I presume the bill for his constituency office which is based in the garage of his house in Rotherham.

  2. 2
    caesars wife says:

    The cavity searching extended digit of mandelson ??

    or is it make way for new PR company man appointed by peter , do hope we can discover the salary

    • 161
      barefootcontessa says:

      the gorgon’s alright , he’s got his new best friend shaun, peter’s a bit miffed though.

  3. 4
    Posh Tory says:

    Thats a lot of people that seem to think they could eat you for breakfast. I’m more of a brunch person… even just skip to lunch – at least then you can have a Guinness to wash it down.

    • 6
      Chinola says:

      Sadly I do feel Guido will be off the menu come 9:30 with the amount of people who would like a serving. Tis a shame as Cramner has already succumbed to a good toasting.

    • 29
      Churchill's Cattleprod says:

      Perhaps you should byline these people with ‘The Curse of Fawkes’, i.e. anyone in the government machinery who has smugly stated that he’s “going to get Guido for once and for all” and yet ends up, like so many broken Nokias, in the Number 10 trash can.

      • 35
        Sir Mufbourne-Harbor says:

        I like that-The CoF. ‘He will CoF’ ‘A bad case of The CoF, etc…

    • 122
      Anonymous says:

      Hey what ever his sexual preferences are, that’s a matter for him, presumably he had to content himself with eating mady for breakfast

    • 232

      PT – have you seen how big he is? He’d feed a maniple of legionaries.

  4. 5
    Kelvin McKensie says:

    Rebeka…… is 110% behind “them”

  5. 7

    Dear All

    Ha! These petty and infantile distractions given out by Guido to mask coming Cameron tyranny are nauseating.

    True Brown is a slavering, self-obsessed, repressed homosexual mad Scotch authoritarian. Ha!

    However the real problems of tomorrow are not how to end the Brown-induced pain (hint, elections are the cure!) rather how to stave off a Tory Holocaust and help the magnanimous SNP and peace-loving Cleggites form a majority.

    From now until the next opening of the polls, the traditional Tory Mafioso-types shall be labouring to intimidate the ethnic minority vote and to disenfranchise the honourable Welsh, Scotch, Geordie and Scouser peoples from exercising their democratic right.

    Only a vote for the SNP, or if you live in Cornwall, the Cleggite LibDems can sever this unceasing, alternating chain of Labour-Tory absolutist plunder and militarism.

    Hopefully together we can wipe out the sickening, self-reliant libertarianism of the Tories and compose the new Parliament entirely of LibDem savants and SNP heroes.

    Hooray!

    The war on “Call Me Dave” Cameron starts now!

    Yours sincerely

    George Laird

    The Campaign for Human Rights at Glasgow University

    • 8
      caesars wife says:

      yawn

    • 13
      The Dark Lord says:

      get a grip. you are up too late. go to bed.

    • 15
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      One word: Boll*cks. Two words: Complete Boll*cks.

    • 18
      Democrat says:

      What is wrong with you, Caesars wife, Mc Speed et al. these comments seem perfect sense to me. Why do you want to accept this celtic tyranny – that includes Cornwall’s LibDems

      Free the English ™

    • 22
      Mick says:

      Wanker. Almost as bad a GB fuckwit

    • 32
      Anonymous says:

      Yes, yes we all KNOW that Scots are mentally unstable. Just stop infesting our blogs, our country, our government et al ad nauseam…

      • 192
        barefootcontessa says:

        George and the gorgon are only two examples of Scotland’s manhood. Don’t
        judge the rest on them!

    • 77
      Gordon's left Ball says:

      George, have you always been a tit or are you doing it just for our amusement.

    • 111
      alex taylor says:

      Yes….. good idea change a thief for a thief

    • 188
      barefootcontessa says:

      Some sense there george, muddled up amongst the paranoia. Politicians are all bastards that’s why they’re politicians – (someone who is astutely conniving and
      intriguing). SNP? yes, Scotland should have been independent years ago, just that, as per 400 yrs or so ago there have always been too many Scots who have connived with the English for their own ambition, and have stabbed Scotland in the back. It’s the same situation today.

    • 210
      Adrian Prole says:

      Just had a look at your website, George. Now I know why you come on here; you get many more comments on Guido’s than you do on your own. You’re a loser.

      • 322

        Dear Tory

        Ha! A fitting name for a cowardly worthless Anglo invader – prole – the slaves of the dirty industrialised sweatshops. Ha!

        My website was groaning under the weight of comments which at the request of my ISP I deleted so as to ease the strain on internet transmission.

        It seems like Tory sleaze, Tory envy and invective never died but took on newer disguises.

        Yours sincerely

        George Laird

        The Campaign for Human Rights at Glasgow University

      • 373

        Dear Adrian Poole

        I come to Guido because it is a very good place to hurl abuse for free to a mainstream audience of the political scene.

        I like the fact that there are so many hoons in here and I will be asking for their help because there is a higher calling than party politics, there is revenge.

        As to being a loser, are you a success? If so then publish your record of success.

        Egg and spoon race that type of stuff!

        I taught students at University of Glasgow who competed for England, Scotland, Britain in different sports, I even had a student who went on to compete at two Olympics, Atlanta and Sydney.

        My clone is doing a splendid job highlighting my blog.

        Do you seriously think I give a shit what they say? IP numbers can be tracked and Guido knows I have an impersonator, so any writ is their problem.

        Finally Adrian don’t be such a wank in future and stop acting like a petulent fairy!

        Yours sincerely

        George Laird
        The Campaign for Human Rights at Glasgow University

        • 390
          barefootcontessa says:

          sorry to criticize George, but you forgot to say – Ha!

        • 400
          Anonymous says:

          Glasgow University – excellent example of Oxymoron.

        • 415
          Adrian Prole says:

          Adrian who? Oh, so you didn’t teach proper subjects, then? Like the rest of your lies, I don’t believe you ever taught anything. Your last paragraph says everything we need to know about you. Go back to your own site where nobody is listening. You come across as being a spotty little ‘erbert who is pumped full of his own self importance. Are you, by any chance, sectioned in an NHS establishment?

    • 249
      older not wiser says:

      What a numpty. If you think the country would be better off run by a bunch of savants and SNP “one trick pony” pillocks you really need to get out more.

      The SNP are fine whilst they just need to pose whilst squandering money Scotland doesn’t have courtesy of their English neighbours.

      If you so up on SNP what the fuck do you care what happens in Westminster anymore than you care what happens in Washington.

      Get real numpty

      • 342
        Mrs Broon (No Relation) says:

        Courtesy of their next door neighbour, that will be the one who spent centuries trying to kill us then. Get a grip, I am sick of hearing how hard done by the English are, we have had your idea of government stuck down our throats for years, you get 2 Scotsmen, all be it both absolutely useless, but YOU voted them in.

    • 312
      Reg511 says:

      Dear George,

      Perhaps you have heard of me and my nationwide campaign in the cause of temperance. Each year for the past fourteen, I have made a tour of Scotland and the North West, including Manchester, Liverpool and Glasgow and occasionally I visit Wales, to give a lecture on the evils of drink. On this tour I have been accompanied by a young friend and assistant, David Powell. David, a young man of good family and an excellent background, is a pathetic example of life ruined by an excessive indulgence in alcohol.

      David would appear with me at the lectures and sit on the platform whoozing and staring at the audiences through bleary, bloodshot eyes, sweating profusely, picking his nose, passing wind and making obscene gestures’ whilst I would point him oout as an example of what drinking could do to a person.

      Last summer unfortunately, David died. A mutual friend has given me your name and I wonder if you would consider taking David’s place on my next tour.

      Yours in good faith,

      Reg

      • 388

        Dear Reg

        I’ve pissed in your bed and used your tooth brush on the toilet pan to clean it.

        Yours sincerely

        George Laird
        The Campaign for Human Rights at Glasgow University

        ps don’t put your left boot on; I shat in it!

      • 457
        Anonymous says:

        That’s the best putdown I’ve ever read…

    • 430
      penwen says:

      George Laird. I think you’ll find is Scot, not scotch, tthat is something you drink. And come on haven’t we go enought Scots already in Westminster.

  6. 9
    Derek Raper says:

    Guido would love to be a press advisor.

    He’d be well good at it he would.

  7. 10
    mitch says:

    Having to deal with the Prime Mentalist every day must be very damaging, all those flying phones and flip flops.

    • 129
      hoof-hearted says:

      Has Gordon got public liability insurance?

      • 195
        Sacha Lottovem says:

        He doesn’t need it. Any claims against him will just go through on expenses, marked XXXXXXX

        • 202
          Biffo says:

          …and blacked out. I’m looking forward to the Telegraph booklet of MPs expenses tomorrow. I’ll bet that doing a bit of comparison between the DT & the Governmen list will expose quite a few discrepancies.

  8. 11
    Scrobs says:

    Well, I heard that Brownfall had taken on Stan Rubbish, who used to be the Darts Correspondent on The Framley Examiner!

    • 311

      It’s so difficult getting good staff these days.

      I recall the advice given in a very politically correct magazine, to throw away half of the CV’s you were sent, so as to avoid employing unlucky people.

      The Penguin

  9. 12
    The Master says:

    Where is Hutton’s seat? Is it a case of parachute-Woodcock-in? Perhaps Liebour high command see it as a compensation for having contracted a severe case of nokiaitis, which apart from causing concussion, can, in extreme cases, manifest itself with the “patient” prone to bouts of severe neck & head twitching constantly in fear of attack by mobile devices.

  10. 14
    Fix_Is_In says:

    Think back a couple of weeks mutterings that Beckett was going to get a role in government (Cabinet Post) then in the reshuffle she resigned etc, etc. Well it my bet she was offered by Brown the Speaker’s chair. Already we are hearing the whips are getting the labour MP’s into line and lets face it they like sheep so not to diffucult to achieve. There is no way anyone can put pressure on labour MP’s as they have nothing to lose as they are all going to face a real fight at next GE. However, she needs cross party support and significant pressure needs to be placed on other MP’s to ensure she does not get their vote. If this women gets the chair it is going to the worse thing for our democracy. I appreciate its a secret ballot (who put that in place? bet is was labour) and an afront in itself to democracy, but pressure can be placed later to see who voted and for whom and made clear that at a GE they will not get our vote, of course better done by the party machine. Cameron must tell his MP’s not to vote for Beckett in the same way Brown is telling his MP’s to vote for her. This is no longer bi-partisan it is rough and tumble politics and Cameron needs to get ahead of the game before it is to late. There needs to be pressure applied on the conservative hiarchy to ensure NO tory MP votes for this woman to block now what otherwise will be her inevitable dragging to the chair. Lets get this stopped because yet again Brown is going to get his way and stick two fingers up to the public. If we act now and start to make representations we might just get it scuppered. Though I seriously doubt it and expect Beckett to be sitting in the chair come Monday. Guido get behind this – you know it makes sense.

    • 16
      Anon says:

      Cameron doesn’t do “ahead of the game”. He’s a spineless establishment spiv who needs taking out and shooting.

      • 63
        Sylvia's Mother says:

        Sad but I fear you are right. He seems to be a face with little substance and although I like a lot of what he say’s particularly on the NHS he needs to get in the game and really hold GB to account. His recent PMQ’s have been lamentable. He has six questions and wastes at least four of them. He needs much better advisors on what Q’s to ask and when to ask them.

        • 105
          Flying Scot says:

          dont you think Dave boy should have a brain and the ability to know what questions to ask without having a bunch of nannies writing his rubbish for him – a bit like what Guido was saying we dont know who writes this sh$te only who mouths it.

        • 125
          Sylvia's Mother says:

          You have a point.

        • 200
          barefootcontessa says:

          Agree. He’s probably got too many advisers. He needs to use his own brain.

      • 252
        The "Angry Aberdonian" says:

        The “heir to Blair” is as “phony as Tony”

        • 288
          Aberdeen Angus McDayie says:

          I do ironic without resorting to quote marks.

          BTW I agree about Call-me Cameroon.

      • 356
        A NON says:

        Although, this is not my post; I do support the sentiment….

    • 19
      St George Laughs says:

      Correct.

      Labour scum needs super-chlorinating.

      We don’t need yet another Labour apparatchik as Speaker, wasn’t the Gorbals Spiv enough ?

    • 60
      bergen says:

      If the useless Beckett ran the HoC the way she catasrophically ran the Agriculture Ministry then Gorbals Mick’s tenure as Speaker may be looked back on as a golden age of enlightened administration.If she is dumped on us (the third Labour Speaker in a row)then Cameron must declare in advance that an incoming Tory administration will not be bound to nod through her re-appointment.

      • 68
        Sylvia's Mother says:

        Agreed. Protocol would probably mean she gets the nod after the next GE. Cameron is unlikely to make a stand. Hope I am wrong. Does nobody believe three labour speakers in a row is wrong wrong wrong. Christ, people really should be up in arms over this – why not?

        • 100
          hoof-hearted says:

          She will create the illusion of doing what the public want, whilst behind the scenes she will still be troughing.

          Margaret Beckett’s expenses speak for themselves. She’s as bad as the rest of them. No wonder they haven’t objected to her – or someone like her.

        • 126
          Sylvia's Mother says:

          Yes, why has her expenses issues gone away? Flowers and pot plants if I remember rightly amongst other more damning claims. Ming Campbell had his bid scuppered with papers saying he had expense issues yet Beckett gets clean sheet. The whole thing stinks.

        • 293
          Cyco Billy says:

          A nod’s as good as wink to a blind horse.

      • 137
        Seth the pig farmer says:

        It seems as if Cameron thinks that all he has to do is sit back and let Labour make an arse of itself. This makes sense up to a point – the point at which Cameron seems to be incapable of making the running on anything of substance. FFS, it was the LibDems that ultimately gave the shove to Martin.

        He needs to make it clear that he will not accept a Labour candidate. “Protocol” says that it should be Labour / Conservative in rotation. Perhaps a candidate from outside would be acceptable, but a 3rd Labour Speaker in a row is not.

        He needs to get a grip on his own party members and put forward a single Conservative candidate that has respect in and outside the house. Then be prepared to press the nuclear button. If Labour try and force one of their own, then he must demand an immediate GE and start a popular campaign rather than the half-arsed teasing that we see at the moment.

        We are at critical moment in our history, and he looks as if he is going to drop the ball.

      • 170
        backwoodsman says:

        Surely no one can be a credible candidate for Speaker unless they are accepted as being at least a half way decent human being ?
        Beckett OTOH , is an incompetent low life, who revelled in the misery she brought to the countryside during her disasterous spell at the min Ag. There are places in the west country where caravan flambe would be dish du jour , given the oportunity.

        • 338
          Captain Haddock says:

          But at least if the “Screaming Skull” lives in a caravan .. she’ll be first in the queue to see the Doctor .. being a “Traveller” an’ all …

      • 204
        barefootcontessa says:

        Could she run the office from her caravan? – show on the road so to speak?

    • 172
      Twizzle says:

      Beckett’s a certainty. No whip – yeah, you reckon? Secret ballot? Yeah, you reckon.

      Most of these Labour mongs have to be told what to do. The electrical charge between their two brain cells has, in most cases, fused.

      Beckett MUST be installed to continue the Martin effect. A Labour party placeman (now woman) to ensure the executuve cannot and will not be held to account.

      • 396
        Sylvia's Mother says:

        This is why NO tories should vote for her with NO tory votes she cannot get the chair. The point is Cameron needs to get to grips NOW with this or she WILL get some tory votes and then be elected. Simples. She (Beckett) the face reminds of a Meercat though that is not very kind to Meerkat’s me thinks.

  11. 17
    Anonymous says:

    “British jobs for british workers”, labour and union policies get british oil workers sacked in favour of foreign workers employed by the french. However you couldnt do it in France.

    You couldnt make it up could you?

    Gordon goes to brussels with the white flag and gives the germans and the french control of the city of London.

    Why bother fighting the second world war and all those brave millions that died too?

    You couldnt make it up could you?

    Vote labour vote for bankruptcy and annihilation of our country.
    The doomsday party. The nuclear scenario party

    • 315
      hoof-hearted says:

      Gordon said he had all the right answers at the G20 summit, and he was hailed as such a clever fellow that all the other countries were going to follow his example.

      By handing over control of the City, he can’t be blamed when it all goes tits up again, can he.

  12. 21
    Mugabe says:

    I am sick to death of Labour’s Stalin type determination to control everything – why can’t they all fuck off now and take their well deserved place of shame in History.

    My god this must be the worst government EVER – they are all mad!

    • 24
      Black Ink Cartridge shortage hits UK Computer Supply Retailers as MPs expenses "published" says:

      AND the problem is that we’ll never know actually how BAD they were because the Cabinet Minutes will be “redacted”.

      • 44
        Scallywag says:

        Anyone found a dictionary entry for ‘redacted’ yet.

        Is is a new westminsterspeak word designed to lead the electorate away from words like censored, suppressed, concealed and covered up, which of course that all understand?

        • 67
          A NON says:

          Exactly! – Well done.

        • 74
          Chartered Accountant says:

          According to my dictionary (Chambers) it means ‘to edit, work into shape’.
          So it is wholly inappropriate to use it as an alternative to ‘censor’.

        • 76
        • 110
          Junior hack says:

          74….. Redacted therefore has a new meaning…… = censorship of the worst kind in covering up corruption.

        • 147
          Seth the pig farmer says:

          It widely used in the US to mean the removal of confidential information in documents released by public bodies into the public domain.

          Which is not quite the same as removing sensitve information to hide criminality and fraud by public officals.

        • 209
          barefootcontessa says:

          Redaction. Or , to work into shape, to frame. Just so.

        • 264

          It means removed “but still there” in computer speak.

          I.E. Don’t rely on it being there.

          Or is that deprecated?

        • 304
          New SOED 1999 free cd-rom edition says:

          redact /rI”dakt/ v.t.LME. [L redact- pa. ppl stem of redigere bring back, collect, etc., f. as RE- + agere drive etc.]1 Bring (reasoning or discourse) into or to a certain form; put together in writing. LME–M17.2 Reduce (a person or thing) to a certain state, condition, etc. Foll. by into, to. LME–M18.3 a Draw up (a statement, decree, etc.). M19.b Put into appropriate literary form; arrange, edit. M19.

        • 307
          New SOED 1999 free cd-rom edition says:

          Blimey. Who could have guessed Guido would want to moderate a dictionary?

          moderate /”mQdreIt/ v. Pa. pple -ated, -ate.LME. [L moderat- pa. ppl stem of moderari, -are reduce, control: see -ATE3.]1 v.t. Make less violent, severe, intense, or rigorous. Formerly also, reduce the amount of (a fine, charge, etc.). LME.b v.i. Become less violent, severe, intense, or rigorous. L17.c v.t. Nuclear Physics. Slow down (a neutron); slow down neutrons in (a reactor). Cf. MODERATOR 6c. M20.2 v.t.a Adjust in quantity or proportion. L15–M17.b Exercise a controlling influence over; regulate, control. M16–E19.c Educ. Review (examination papers, results, candidates, etc.) in relation to an agreed standard so as to ensure consistency of marking. M20.3 a v.t. In academic and ecclesiastical contexts: preside over (a deliberative body) or at (a debate etc.). L16.b v.i. Act as moderator, preside, now esp. in the Presbyterian Church in Scotland. L16.4 a v.i. Act as mediator or arbitrator. Also, take a mediating view. L16–M18.b v.t. Decide (a question) as an arbitrator. E17–M18.

          The reader’s attention is drawn to the reference to the Presbyterian Church in Scotland.

        • 344
          Wycked Hors says:

          Weasel words designed to obfuscate rather than illuminate.

          See also: extraordinary rendition = torture by proxy;

          terminate with extreme prejudice = murder.

          …it all started in America you know.

    • 73
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      Brown should be redacted! Along with Mandy, Straw, Harmon, Balls x 2 my god I could be typing all day so will stop now – you get my drift.

  13. 23
    nell says:

    The DT is publishing a 68 page supplement tomorrow detailing the claims made by every MP, after it condemned the disgracefully blacked out expense claims published yesterday that concealed the worst of the abuses.

    Shall I buy it ???- yes for the first time in ages I will buy a DT but only because I am going to preserve the supplement for my grandchildren so that they know never to trust a member of any government ever again!!!!

    As for gordon and his PR men – why bother with new PR people?? – nothing they do can make gordon look attractive to the electorate – apart from blacked out expenses yesterday he was forced into a U Turn over the Iraq War Inquiry – he is simply a disaster a day!!!!

    • 26
      The Electorate ? What's it gotta do with them ? says:

      MPS “official” expenses were published on a “need to know”basis and the electorate don’t “need to know” -

    • 28
      Dogger says:

      PR people for Gordoom? As much use as a sell-by date on a corpse.

    • 33
      hoof-hearted says:

      He must realise that by not publishing this information, the majority of the electorate will be hopping mad.

      He kepps saying he wants full transparency, and then we get this. They must have an awful lot to hide.

    • 62
      Cato Street Conspirator says:

      We don’t need a 68 page DT supplement to tell us all MPs are shysters. My dear old dad took me on one side when I was six and told me that little fact, as his dad had before him. That’s what being working class means.

    • 91
      Indigo says:

      for the first time in ages I will buy a DT but only because I am going to preserve the supplement for my grandchildren so that they know never to trust a member of any government ever again!!!!

      Me, too.

  14. 25
    hoof-hearted says:

    How many more of Brown’s cronies will quit, either to further their own ends or save their sorry arses?

  15. 27

    I rang my local reporter and asked him if he was going to run a story on my MP’s ( Tory ) troughing… he said it was unlikely as his editor didn’t like to upset the man… I said that I had done some digging and found 2 sat nav’s, 2 laptops ( top end ones ), 3 camera’s, eye exams x 3, contact lenses, Mens clothing and various other items that looked like regular day-to-day stuff that we mere mortals have to buy from taxed income….. Still not interested…. Fuck that, I will publish and hand out flyers at weekend to everyone on market day and make sure that they know that there local MSM is too scared to report the truth…. fucktards, the lot of em….

    • 48
      Sir Mufbourne-Harbor says:

      Fantastic. See if you can get a local business to fund/sponsor the scheme. This could work all over and put a shot across the bowel of the local newspaper too. Just pick a few from the advertisments in then paper.

    • 94
      Indigo says:

      Well done. Will you come back and tell us how it went? I’d really love to hear about it.

    • 150
      Seth the pig farmer says:

      Which newspaper refuses to follow up that sort of story – they need to be named and shamed.

    • 270

      FYI
      eye exams can be charged to a business legitimately.

    • 367
      Good luck says:

      Your local paper MIGHT be interested in covering your protest though – arms length – covering their arses etc.

      Give them another call and let them know the time & date.

  16. 31
    Lance Legstrong says:

    this kunt’s got more spokesmen than Mavic wheels

  17. 34
    BBC mad fanny €100K bint says:

    it’s the climate! global warming! we’re all going to die horribly, unless you pay me big bucks.

    • 38
      Dick the Prick says:

      Yes please. Could you jibber on about ethnics too – they’re really fucking interesting and stuff?

      • 47
        high-maintenance media fanny says:

        No the ethnics are okay as climate change will only affect racist, homophobic anglo-saxons and celts – proven scientific fact – who refuse to inegrate into the new marxist utopia of Britainland. To make sure of this plod and diversity officers have orders to rest their boots on the heads of non-believers when the waters rise.

        • 58
          Dick the Prick says:

          Thank fuck for that – was a little worried that mad mother fucking mullahs weren’t going to kill my family off for no good reason other than it’s Friday. Pheeeewwwweeee – that’s a relief.

        • 273

          They suicide-murder on thursdays so they can meet the desert paedophile and his virgins on friday in heaven.

  18. 36
    Dogger says:

    In the Guardian:

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/politics/2009/jun/18/labour-conservatives-mps-expenses-claims

    “On the ever-unforgiving blogosphere, there is talk of protest marches through the towns and cities of Britain, as well as reheated promises to put up independent candidates, in an attempt to rekindle the anti-sleaze mood already reflected in this month’s European parliament election results.”

    Unforgiving? Well I can hardly claim to speak for the blogosphere, but I, personally, have now completely forgiven Brown for bottling out of an election in 2007.

    • 207
      Moral Orel says:

      Silly Grauniad hack! Forgiveness is contingent upon remorse, contrition and recompense by the guilty party. No remorse; no forgiveness.

      (MPs may want to look the long words up)

  19. 37
    Stronghold Barricades says:

    Could be he’s leaving because he knows whatever he tries to spin the questions just keep coming back about Brown and his leadership style

    Maybe these are the kind of changes that Brown mentioned when he met the plp

  20. 39
    desperate media shill says:

    Now look here, far too many of you scummy proles are on to us and all our scams – this just isn’t on! We’ve been told from above to ramp up the global warming shite, sorry, proven scientific fact, and threaten you all with imprisonment and ruin if you don’t pay your TV taxes, claim a penny over in benefits or drink half a glass of beer and drive. You are all behaving beastly and it won’t be tolerated! What do you think this is, a free country?

  21. 41
    cynic says:

    A public servant paid by us targeting a blogger for political reasons? Never!

    One way to solve the balance of payments problem may be to sack 25% of the civil service on day 1 and make the rest start real work on day 2, starting with the SCS and working down

    • 208
      Moley says:

      The way to achieve spending cuts is to make every organisation that is publicly funded subject to the F.O.I. Act, information published should include salaries and pensions.

      That should include;

      All Local Authorities.
      All Quangos.
      The whole of the Civil Service.
      All Hospitals and Foundation Trusts.
      BBC
      The Military
      All Government Contractors.
      All private public service providers. e.g. Rail and Utilities.

      After seeing what has happened in Parliament, an incoming Government could achieve more than 10% spending cuts and increase its popularity with the electorate.

      • 425
        Sweet Lass of Richmond Hill says:

        No it isn’t. Complying with FOI requests is extremely time consuming so additional staff would be needed to do it properly. In my last job in the civil service (quite a while ago now), I found when I arrived that the files were a complete shambles and we would have been unable to provide any information from them without major work. The reasons for the mess seemed to be that there had been substantial staff cuts ( money diverted to paying consultants and party members on secondments from the voluntary sector and “rolling out” a variety of off-the-top-of the-head initiatives) and the policy of recruiting graduates to jobs which had once been given to school-leavers meant that those at the bottom of the hierarchy thought they were too important to do basic work like filing and photocopying.

      • 434
        Prince Rupert says:

        Totally agree, more transparency, and lets stop flexi-time – which is giving public sector workers 60 days paid holiday, and stop bonuses, which are an illusion

  22. 42
    Sir Mufbourne-Harbor says:

    Why should there be inheritance tax after all other working and living taxation when it will be continually wasted by these politicians? The DT have a comment about this matter btw.
    It is a wicked immoral tax on heaped on la ifetime of modern slavery.

  23. 43
    Anonymous says:

    BLACK OUT a black out pork MP

  24. 45
    Hugh Janus says:

    Excellent – Evan Davies giving Jackass Straw a bloody good kicking on Toady over funding for the probation service (or lack of). Keep up the good work Mr D, nail these obfuscating swine to the floorboards. The only thing they are supremely good at is dodging the question.

    • 66
      Sinic(sic) says:

      Agree! It sounded awfully like the tractor production figures in the government’s (Government??) last five year plan, with a lot of “Not me, guv” to fluff out the diversionary b*ls**t — just like Our Dear Leader.

      Did they attend the same brainwashing and indoctrination school?

      They should own up, We should blow it up.

    • 255
      Anonymous says:

      Too right Hugh, thats more like it.

      They dont like it up ‘em!

  25. 46
    nell says:

    O/T sorry!

    The Gaurdain is reporting this morning that Met Police Commissioner has said, following initial inquiries, a small number of MP’s and members of the HoL, may now face a full inquiry under caution (and possible prosecution?) .

    The BaronessU is said to be among them!!!! !!!! Happy Days!!!!

    • 53
      Hugh Janus says:

      More power to his elbow. Successful prosecution of at least some of these thieves is the very least we are entitled to expect.

    • 54
      Sir Mufbourne-Harbor says:

      I’d like to believe that the police don’t have much choice otherwise.

    • 57
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      Do not count on it – whitewash comes to mind. However, we live in hope.

      • 131
        Whippersnapper says:

        Has nobody told you that whitewash is delivered by the tanker now to Whitehall area? Even the 20 litre size had become completely inadequate.
        Read the bilge by Brian Binley MP (master of porkies) today in the Indie – the man is raving…..the poor old sod still does just not get it. – Even now. Amazing, but then again, I’m easily amazed.

        • 226
          Sacha Lottovem says:

          According to Binley in that piece this week he “was given an insight into what it must have been like in the dark days of East European Communism”. Welcome to the way the rest of us poor bastards have to live, Brian.

    • 71
      Sinic(sic) says:

      Does the Met have any powers OUTSIDE the UK? I think not.

      In the case of Baroness U they should have!

    • 84
      hoof-hearted says:

      Very few, if any MP’s will be prosecuted. They’ll just close ranks and protect thier own. Same old same old.

    • 119
      Junior hack says:

      DG……: Commissioner……. I think we need some heads to cover my statement that I will not tolerate dishonesty in my government.

      Comm…..: Yes sir, how many and who?

      • 159
        Seth the pig farmer says:

        Exactly, a few sacrifical lambs to please the mob. They still think that it is business as usual….

  26. 50
    Pat says:

    The FT is making it up- thats why they don’t name a source.

  27. 51
    Augeas says:

    OT.

    Evan Davies gave Jack Straw a good going over this morning on Today. Straw had no answer to accusations of dishonesty and turning a 70% increase in funding for the probation service into a fall in the number of qualified probation officers and resorted to generalised abuse.
    For once a well-prepared and combative interview on Pravda. Have they finally smelt the coffee, or is this just a lovers’ tiff over ZaNu dipping into “their” licence fee pot for universal slow broadband?

    • 69
      Mildred Fish says:

      Were we listening to the same thing? I thought that old Slippery did what he invariably does? That is, continue to quote a variety of figures regardless of the question. It was and is a complete waste of time even speaking to these people.

      • 72

        The usual, except that Evan sounded genuinely pissed off, and pointedly didn’t retract his claim that Straw had misled a selec committee.

      • 216
        barefootcontessa says:

        Most of them are trained lawyers, that helps.

      • 346
        Evan Mor Anonymous says:

        The drone of Straw on Toady for 12 years has evoked a range emotions here, ranging from somnolence to the need for a bowel motion. Today was the first time I heard him sound rattled – not even shaking hands with Mugabe raised the temperature of his sangue-froid one jot. Perhaps Evan Davis should show his full-on body piercings more often to his interviewees?

    • 89
      CCL says:

      The boy did good, Evan appeared to get very angry and I was waiting for The Jackel to say I am reporting you to the head master (of the BBC). Everyday this governemnt crumbles, everyday it is more evident their time is up, it is getting beyond a joke. Another year of this will see the national debt climb to unspeakable levels, somebody needs to get a grip before it is to late. We need a general election.

      • 168
        Seth the pig farmer says:

        The only way to deal with these tits is to ignore them. Invite them on ask them the question, let them waffle some bullshit, and then politley thank them and sent them on their way. Then don’t even invite them on.

        What would be worse for a politician than to be igored and treated as irrelevent?

      • 222
        barefootcontessa says:

        He’s now the best interviewer on radio 4 today prog. Humphreys has gone off the boil, Naughtie is useless, and the rest are second-rate. Davies has really got into the role.

        • 249

          …plus he’s the only one of the trumvirate with full-on body piercings. Go Evan!

        • 435
          Prince Rupert says:

          He is also not an overt Labour supporter. Humphreys is the most annoying, rude and labour arse licking wanker on the Beeb. And he’s Welsh, so Lloyd-George knew his father

      • 224
        barefootcontessa says:

        We need a good general!

  28. 59
    Koba says:

    I always used a ferret to flush a rat to the gun

  29. 61
    Anonymous says:

    None of the candidates inspire any confidence. Of course, Parliament reflects society. Time to have a good hard look at ourselves and then send an unequivocal message to the political class that the game is over. We want our democracy back. Under Mr Smiley ‘I’m a pretty straight sort of guy’ Parliament was turned into a kleptocracy. Listening to Hazel Blears chirping on about helping the poor people of Salford I quietly slipped two fingers down my throat. The hypocrisy of this woman sums up all that is so utterly rotten about our politics. She is unfit to represent Salford. The local Labour apparatchiks may have saved her skin last night. It’s only temporary. She’ll be out on her ear in less than a year. And good riddance.

    • 65
      Hugh Janus says:

      Yes, I too heard her gut-wrenching comments this morning, some self-serving claptrap about helping the poor – while she was helping herself to many thousands of pounds of taxpayers’ money.

      I’m still hoping that the good people of Salford will find their voice at the next GE and send this utterly crass and embarrassing woman packing.

      • 80
        Huw Jampton says:

        Hear! Hear!!

      • 86
        Sylvia's Mother says:

        The woman is shameless. Please resign fu*k *ff and leave politics you sorry excuse for a human being. Sanctimonious, hypocritical cow was going to say worse but though better of it. I am so angry. Can’t you tell! Going to doctor to get some valium its worth the prescription charge which no doubt has gone up since last visit. Maybe I can claim it on expenses.

        • 140
          Whippersnapper says:

          Think about those tossers around that table last night listening to her and finally agreeing with her – those are the sort of people who ’select’ our MPs countrywide.
          Breathtaking huh!!
          By the way Sylvia’s mother I think your comments were extremely well controlled under excess provocation – well done.

        • 229
          barefootcontessa says:

          She must have been very persuasive, or perhaps she’d had her hair re-hennaed, at our expense of course!

      • 214
        Moley says:

        If they follow the precedent seen at the last elections in labour strongholds there is a real risk that the Salford electorate will vote for the party that must not be named.

      • 221
        Charles_E_Hardwidge says:

        That should happen, but how to make it. Labour is in the DNA of Salford voters, but given a Clean Candidate, I am sure something could be done. Look to the once safe Labour seat of Bleanau Gwent lost to an independent (Mr Law) in 2005 over the issue of all woman shortlists. Shows what can be done when a principled candidate makes a principled stand in one of Labour’s Rotten Boroughs.

    • 87
      hoof-hearted says:

      Hazel Blears will do whatever it takes to save herself, and her pension. She’s had 12 years to “reconnect with her constituency”. Pity she didn’t think about that before all this happened.

      Let’s hope the good people of Salford will remember that come polling time.

    • 101
      Dr Feelgood says:

      She made one interesting comment along the lines of, “this was the first sensible conversation I’ve had about expenses in months”.

      So, the little chat she had with the Prime Minister a couple of weeks ago wasn’t sensible?

      PS. Don’t need the help of fingers to retch when I hear her stupid voice.

  30. 70

    Fascinating media coverage of this Total dispute – you need to dig pretty deep to find that it’s another “British jobs for British workers” row. Maybe the media have decided to get on board with the political classes and supress anything that might bring succour to the Unmentionables? Stable doors…. horses….

    • 93
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      Just watched the Sky News piece and it goes back to the winter when there were other walkouts at other plants around the country. This could become and should become a major story. 900 sackings. What is UNITE going to do about this? More importantly what is MANDY going to do about it? Foreign workers and british jobs for british workers yeah right. Another Brown Whopper!

      • 112
        Doctor Mick says:

        These foreign workers are members of the European Union. Just as Brits have every right to work throughout the EU it is reciprocal. We’re either in or out.

        • 121
          Dr Feelgood says:

          I’m all in favour of the European right to live and work anywhere in the EU. In fact it’s one of its few achievements.

          However, the perception (rightly or wrongly) is that the recruitment and retention policies at LOR are unfair. The employers seem to have handled this latest incident very crassly.

        • 146
          Whippersnapper says:

          I’m OUT…are you in?

        • 225
          Charles_E_Hardwidge says:

          That is true Doctor Mick and I am working right now in a European country myself. But tell me, what exactly did Brown mean when he said “British Jobs for British Workers” – seems pretty clear to me that he was blowing a dog whistle – I am so glad it has blown right back in his putrid face!

        • 251

          Is “dog whistle” some sort of masonic codeword for a Brazilian?

        • 257
          Anon says:

          I’m out please.

        • 262
          Doctor Mick says:

          Charles_E_Hardwidge Sir, Britain is a European country.

          British jobs for British workers sounds like protectionism, interferism and indeed fascism.

          Get the eggs out boys!

        • 333
          Augeas says:

          The Docs are right, but Total has form as long as your arm. Allegations of corruption in Iran and Italy as well as a highly questionable relationship with recently deceased Gabon dictator Omar Bongo and a lucrative joint venture with the Burmese junta. Oh and I nearly forgot, both the two biggest explosions in Western Europe since World War 2 – Buncefield and Toulouse. Nice people to do business with.

        • 447
          salty balls says:

          reporter on sky saying the romanian gippos in belfast were working in the community selling the big issue some play the accordion in shop doorways brilliant thats What we need more fucking benefit claimants we have enough shit of our own

    • 144
      Don't Panic, Don't Panic! says:

      Time to fill the car and a few jerry cans.

      • 189
        cheche says:

        I am in favour of the right to work in the EU. When the economy finally collapses and there is no money left to pay the dole bill, we will need to be able to work in the EU.

      • 414
        Anonymous says:

        Again.

  31. 75
    My name is Michael Caine says:

    Off topic

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00l94hz/Newsnight_Scotland_18_06_2009/

    Watch Eric Joyce being grilled about expenses…Could not be more unconvincing. Pays rent to his best friend/property agent (not the landlord) as well as paying him a fee from expenses for advice. Did you pay capital gains on the property you sold……..Why did you send £180 of taxpayers money on 3 oil paintings….because they looked nice!

    Must be on his way out

    • 104
      Hugh Janus says:

      Thanks for the link! Would you buy a secondhand car from this man? No, I wouldn’t even dream of stepping onto his forecourt. Note the lack of eye contact during the CGT questions – as shifty as they come. He’s clearly from another planet, so I hope his constituents will do the decent thing and put him out of our misery.

      Incidentally, we could do with a few more interviewers like this one – eat your heart out Paxo.

  32. 78
    We will clean your house if you can't says:

    Salford Liebore party just does not get it. This is nothing to do with Party politics – it is House cleaning and if you don’t WE will

    • 95
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      Hear, Hear.

    • 343

      In a wonderful display of fake democracy, the Salford Labour Party ignored the wishes of it’s membership and had it’s delegates vote to keep the Ginger Minger as their diminutive and diminished MP.

      This pretty much ensures that there will not be a NuLiebore Member for Salford after the General Election, as the twisting little weasel Blears will be a wonderful vote loser. Disgusted of Salford will either vote for the BNP or stay at home, which is pretty close to the same thing.

      In the meantime, the Chipmunk is damaged goods, a wonderfully easy target for the opposition parties. As some might say, Fucking Delicious!

      The Penguin

  33. 83
    Charles_E_Hardwidge says:

    There is only one thing which will satisfy the people of this country at the moment – a general election – anything else is just pointless window dressing (as Caroline Flint might have put it).
    Call an election now! We must keep up the pressure for this. At the moment Brown and crew are bankrupting the nation – 20 billion in borrowing just for May. Call an election NOW! We need a new government with a mandate to sort out the terrible mess our public finances are in!

    Election NOW!

  34. 92
    Dr Feelgood says:

    Meanwhile out in the real world…

    The sackings at the Lindsey Oil Refinery could be the start of some major national disruption.

    Gordon’s “British Jobs for British Workers”, faux pas isn’t going to go away.

    • 97
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      Agree with you this is going to become a very big issue. My guess is others will walkout in support. And so they should.

      • 237
        Sacha Lottovem says:

        There were walkouts in support yesterday at both Eggborough and Drax power stations. This was covered locally in Yorkshire, was it not mentioned nationally?

      • 300
        barefootcontessa says:

        If this happened in France the whole country would be out!

        • 402
          Sylvia's Mother says:

          Your absolutely right in France this would be a very major issue. French workers protect french jobs big time. They do not call it protectionism they call it french jobs for french workers. Now we know where Gordon got it from!

    • 99
      resurgemus says:

      I think you will find this is another Jonah spectacular.

      He “dog whistled ” British Jobs for British Workers and they all promptly went off and voted for Mr Brons

      • 116
        Doctor Mick says:

        He can’t promise something he cannot give. He cannot interfere in the procurement processes of a business and prevent other EU members businesses competing and winning contracts.

        Summer of Discontent looms.

        • 124
          resurgemus says:

          Problem is he does promise things he cannot give and then wonders why people get pissed off and cynical.

          Think I shall be filling up the car from now on

          Still is a summer of discontent and improvement on a winter of discontent ?

        • 132
          The Pedant says:

          Do you spent many hours at Brussels DM?

        • 142
          Doctor Mick says:

          About half an hour – just enough time to sign in for the day.

    • 108
      hoof-hearted says:

      There could be quite a large strike over this if enough Unions get involved.

    • 109
      Charles_E_Hardwidge says:

      Let’s hope so! For once, I would support a general strike to bring down this hopeless excuse for a government and force a general election.

      • 218
        Susie says:

        Me too!

        The only time Brownfall did a U turn was the fuel strikes 8 years ago. He could fix that by lowering fuel duty for a while. He can’t fix this one. The EU’s got him in a corner.

        We’ll probably be getting that old Heath line “Who’s governing the country?” from him in a few weeks… (and we’ll answer: “You have been!”).

      • 260
        Anon says:

        General strike please.

  35. 98
    Pork Busted says:

    BLACKOUT YOUR

    BLACKOUT MP

  36. 106
    Anonymous says:

    Dear Guido,
    Is Gordon bonkers? Page 14, today’s Daily Mail might be worth a look.

  37. 113
    Trooper says:

    Woodcock is an odious little shit. When he was a Labour staffer, he spent an entire by-election campaign in Hartlepool shagging some poor party secretary, behind the back of his equally vile fiance Mandy Telford (fat, gobby, Scottish student issues bint). When chickens came home to roost, he denied it all, accusing said secretary of being a liar. What a scum bag.

    BTW, he only got his job as reward for recording Howard Flight’s infamous tax speech before the last general election!

  38. 114
    TheBigYin says:

    That would be one BIG breakfast Guido…I don’t think any of those tossers have the apatite for it, there eye’s are bigger than their bellies.

    TBY
    (F2C)

  39. 115
    Gordon Brown says:

    █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ ██ ██ ██ global █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ ██ ██ ██ started in America █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ ██ ██ ██ hard working families█████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ Mr 10% █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ transparent █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ rocking horse █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ ██████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ nappies █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █

  40. 117
    MP, PM, they're all the same says:

    Go after this one Guido:

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/mps-expenses/5572042/Tony-Blair-claimed-7000-for-new-roof-two-days-before-leaving-No.10.html

    A fine example set as UN Ambassador to the Middle East.

    • 127
      mad fred 2 para retired says:

      Indeed.

      And don’t forget the deal that has been done to swerve McMental away from supporting Barroso for EU president again in favour of Blair. Blair has him by the balls.

      How fitting for the EU to exchange a rabid anti nation state extremist communist like Barroso for a war criminal like Blair.

      The EU & President Blair were made for each other.

    • 176
      shrinking sack of shite says:

      It beggars belief. I was feeling in a good mood but it has gone a bit grey now. I Seem to not have any black left.

  41. 120
    Count Down says:

    F █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ U █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ C █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ K █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ O █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ F █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █ F █████ ██ ██████████ ███████ █

    • 130
      Dogger says:

      Does that come as a T-shirt?

      • 141
        P A Tentit says:

        Good idea

        • 152
          Dogger says:

          Who can Photoshop this and get it donked all over a shipping container-full of the best Chinese cotton? Polyester would do, though.

          I see the future on Camden High Street – and it is BLACK.

  42. 133
    Dogger says:

    Telegraph now going nuclear on expenses:

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/mps-expenses/cabinet-expenses/

    The gloves are off.

  43. 134
    Mildred Fish says:

    Entire cabinet expenses just out on Telegraph website!

  44. 136
    Swing Doors 'R' Us says:

    Keep em coming (and going)

  45. 157
    Thats News says:

    I think it is time Gordon Brown, King Rat, joined the ratine exodus. And perhaps this might be the way to get his grasping little paws off the deck?

    Expensesgate scandal continues. Thats News argues for an investigation to find out who introduced this systematic, top down, abuse in the first place

    • 186
      hoof-hearted says:

      They introduced it themselves and passed it themselves. What a good day that must have been.

    • 258

      King Rat is an intelligent, hardworking and industrious character in the eponymous James Clavell novel. Please therefore choose another phrase to describe the finger-chewer in chief.

  46. 158
    Mildred Fish says:

    5938.58 in repairs in one month for Milliband …

    • 166
      Mildred Fish says:

      and 525 for a replacement garage door… And on, and on it goes. Morals and ethics have long been abandoned.

    • 167
      It's all Balls says:

      That’s more than the annual basic married couples pension – just ask Nick Clegg :-)

      They are all so far removed from the real World that they should go and we should start again.

      Election now

    • 169
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      Which Miliband? do they come off a labour conveyor belt. You could not make this up.

    • 173
      Dogger says:

      They all need to be ripped new ones – then they can send their repair bills to their own proctologists.

  47. 174
    Rexel 56 says:

    ***** Charity Cuts McSnot’s Grass ********

    2008-09 expenses just released on DT website shoes that a charity has been cutting the grass at McSnot’s Cowdenbeath “home” for £35 per week.

    Sadly, even the DT has redacted the name of the charity so we don’t know who the lucky mower might be – I tried Googling “mental health lawn mower prime minister trough” but no luck.

  48. 177
    Sylvia's Mother says:

    How much must it have cost for all this redacting? It must have taken 1000’s of man hours to do this. Surely a simple searc and replace of sensitive stuff would have been adequate given the DT expose. And why do they need security in any event no fucker would want to bother them as they have NO VALUE as human beings or as targets.

    • 175
      Mildred Fish says:

      Cost of “redacting,” a euphemism for censorship = 1.2 Million.

    • 191
      hoof-hearted says:

      Apparently, they were advised to “redact” this information because of the Data Protection Act.

      The DT has over 700,000 pages of this stuff so it must have cost a king’s ransom to get a firm in to do this – courtesy of the taxpayer, of course.

      • 193
        Mildred Fish says:

        As per above, it cost 1.2 million

        • 215
          hoof-hearted says:

          Guido – your blog is brilliant, but it’s seroiously not good for my blood pressure. I need to go and have a lie down before I explode.

    • 216
      Seth the pig farmer says:

      The blocking out of most of the infomation on the receipts was done so that the incriminating information on the dodgy receipts for payments for work not actually carried out, payments to family members etc could also be blocked out.

      There is no data protection issue regarding information in the public domain, eg business trading addresses.

      If the Telegraph publishes the full data tomorrow as promised, then the cat really will be out of the bag.

    • 223
      The Pedant says:

      I don’t know. It beats a good fox hunt anyday!!

  49. 179
    DisgustedOfMitcham2 says:

    Can anyone tell me whether it’s common practice for MPs to send out mailshots to constituents saying how wonderful their party is and that you should vote for them?

    Mine does it all the time, and it looks like she claims for it on expenses.

    Isn’t it against the rules to claim for party political stuff? Is it just mine who does that or all they all at it?

    • 187
      nell says:

      Harriett Harman does lots of that – look at her personal expense claims for it:
      30,000 A4 leaflets – 40 colour – £800.00
      45,000 A4 Parliamentary Reports – £1100.00
      15000 16 page 4 colour annual report 130gsm coated – £3000.00
      10,000 News Letters – £350.00
      Advertising in the Southwark News – £223.25
      Pensioners Centre Mail – £201.00

      Why are we paying for her self-publicity?

      • 190
        nell says:

        Well first item should read 4 colour of course!!!!

      • 282
        Lestweforget says:

        Don’t worry Jack Straw cleaned this up – remember the 10K Communications Allowance?

        Perhaps we should ask our own MPs what they spent this on? Oh sorry,it’s a no receipts under £250 quid arrangement again.

        The only thing that needs redacting is the scumbags who filled in the claims.

    • 220
      Seth the pig farmer says:

      As long as they put some fig leaf on information such as their surgery times etc on it, they can claim that it is not party political.

      Just the same as government information campaigns are not propaganda….

      • 248
        DisgustedOfMitcham2 says:

        Does anyone know exactly what the rules are on this? If it’s true that a paragraph of genuine information in a 20-page booklet of party political bollocks means that it’s officially “within the rules”, then I guess there’s not much we can do until the time comes to cast our votes next year.

        However, if it’s against the rules to claim for something that’s mostly party political, what are the chances of making an official complaint that might go somewhere?

    • 233
      Whore with a heart of gold. says:

      Mine does to, Andrew Gwynne, Denton & Reddish, bastard.

      • 392
        Adrian Prole says:

        Did you once do business from the “Pomona” on Reddish Lane? If so, I used to work with bloke who probably knew you. God bless.

    • 261
      Sir William Waad says:

      Mine does it, broadsheet size (she is quite large).

  50. 180
    nell says:

    gordon wrote this about himself :

    “Everywhere I go in the country people have stories to tell about the differences Labour policies have made – people whose lives have been saved – mums and dads who have learnt new skills – the elderly who go out more now that our streets are safer….”
    (reported by Tom Utley Daily Mail)

    If gordon really believes these lies and believes that people really regard him as their saviour, and that’s what he is implying with this article, then he’s more deranged than we thought.

    • 211
      hoof-hearted says:

      I’ve got a story to tell Gordon about the change in my lifestyle since I lost my job.

      Our son was mugged at knifepoint on Monday evening in South East London. His phone was taken and his wallet. Thankfully, he wasn’t hurt.

      This is the difference Labour policies have made to us – but not the sort of thing he would like published, is it!

      Gordon Brown needs sectioning – NOW!!

      • 317
        barefootcontessa says:

        It would take forever to describe the deterioration in my life since newlabour took power. Plus the illegal Iraq war. The shame I feel at being British and having such
        a terrible inadequate third rate self-serving government. Thank goodness I am able to spend half the year in France. Newlabour has no moral compass, packed with ravenously ambitious mps who straight away usurped the labour party to serve their own ends.

        • 406
          Sylvia's Mother says:

          You sound just as pissed off as me. A problem shared and all that…….

      • 463
        Summer_Breeze says:

        So sorry to hear what happened to your son. I hope that it hasn’t knocked his confidence too much and that nothing similar happens to him again in the future.

    • 213
      grandma B says:

      Pass the sick bucket!

    • 227
      Count Down says:

      McFuck should come to our industrial estate and listen to the story of break ins, redundancy, fly tipping, red tape, debt, tax….

    • 265
      Doctor Mick says:

      NEW LABOUR

      keeping families working hard

  51. 181
    Mildred Fish says:

    Slippery Jack. Just a quick look before ah goo oot. This from 2007:

    “P.S. May need to change the taps” Add that to the £1995.00 he claimed to paint his garage door and remove an old shed.

    Then it was a 400.00 TV, which was part of a three month expenses bonanza that cost 3049.00. Full claim on food, of course, = 1200.

    And three months later he was back in the trough for another 3200

    And these are “expenses” mind.

    Foo king ell

  52. 182
    The Beast Of Clerkenwell says:

    Gordon has lost wood?

  53. 196
    Biffo says:

    ‘honest to goodness Labour supporter’ – aren’t there a number ogf oxymorons in that statement?

    • 197
      Biffo says:

      ..and a number of typing errors in my comment – DOH!

    • 345
      Mrs Broon (No Relation) says:

      Never met an honest one in my life, and you should be in the Pub when they get together and crucify each other behind their backs.

  54. 203
    mad fred 2 para retired says:

    No wonder there was no money for body armour or armoured vehicles for our troops out in the sand winning hearts & minds to prop up Labours Muslim vote.

    From todays Telegraph:

    Gordon Brown used his Parliamentary allowances to boost his expenses claims by switching his designated second home shortly before he moved into Downing Street.

    The taxpayer contributed almost £10,000 to the costs of Chancellor Darling buying a new London flat after he changed the official designation of his second home.

    Ed Balls – one of Gordon Brown’s closest allies, claimed £33 for two Remembrance Sunday poppy wreaths — and had the bill disallowed.

    Foreign Secretary Milibands spending on his constituency home was so extensive that even his gardener queried the costs.

    The Justice Secretary only paid half the amount of council tax that he claimed back on his parliamentary allowances over four years.

    Utter troughing b_stards.

    Ther eis not one English ounce of decency or core public service values in any of the Labour front bench.

    Election. NOW.

  55. 212
    chronic says:

    Has Dianne Abbott got a black box?

    • 271
      Ride on Time says:

      You’d need full breathing apparatus if you went anyway near it. I think it goes off completely in a couple of weeks.

    • 398
      Adrian Prole says:

      Black boxes are usually orange; which begs the question, “has Peter Hain got one?”. And does this mean that he is a cυnt? Don’t answer that – it’s a rhetorical question to which I already know the answer.

  56. 231
    Sunonmars says:

    Why are the telegraph not highlighting the serious crimes unmasked in the unredacted expenses.

    There’s some stuff on the commons site thats not in the telegraphs version. So either they deliberately left them out or didnt get them all.

  57. 237
    mad fred 2 para retired says:

    Ed Balls – one of Gordon Brown’s closest allies, claimed £33 for two Remembrance Sunday poppy wreaths.

    What is it with Labour politicans who cannot bring themselves to even buy a wreath or a poppy without claiming back the money to assuage their anti British army ideology & conscience?

    Labour have sent british troops into battle 6 times since 1997 – the least they could do is buy a f_cking wreath or a poppy out of their own money.

    Balls isnt the only Labour extremist who has disrespected our military by placing his rabid ideology above his public iffice & duty as a minister of the crown.

    I want this Government gone.

    They have no moral authority to remain & no mandate for their McNuts leader.

    election NOW

    • 241
      hoof-hearted says:

      Hear Hear!

    • 253
      Seth the pig farmer says:

      and had so decimated the Army Medical Services, that it needed private charity to provide basic treatment and rehabilitation.

      Join the Midsummer Revolution

    • 274
      Shithead says:

      I think Balls is even worse than the One-Eyed Fat Man – and that’s saying something.

  58. 239
    Ever Vigilant says:

    #87–Flying Scot—

    You know perfectly well that a signifant proportion of the population will always hear “tories”if someone speaks the wiord conservative — so does John Mann who is in fact as crafty as a cartload of monkeys.

    He was making a sly attempt to to give a subliminal message to some semi-literate voters.

    This was a shabby trick but not surprising from Mann who is really a puffed up partisan masquerading as an Honest Joe.

    Incidentally, Iquestion your motive in making a fuss about the precise use of a word as cover to launch a craftily worded attack on Teresa May.

    Are you a labour party hack ? Or a student at the feet of Mcbride ?Whichever,
    you still need to hone your spinning skills.

    • 243
      hoof-hearted says:

      …..and Mandleson is at the heart of it all.

      • 272
        Shithead says:

        Correct – and there’s nothing we can do to remove him. He will do that himself, as cocking up is in his DNA. He can’t help himself. Well, apart from grabbing rent boys, that is.

    • 254
      hoof-hearted says:

      John Mann claimed £700 rent a month for second home in London in 2004-05. Regular claims for newspapers and unspecified “household requisites”. A year later, claimed room in Premier Inn while repairs done at flat

      Bloody Trougher.

      • 306
        Unsworth says:

        Repairs done at flat and he claims for Premier Inn? What kind of house insurance is that?

  59. 245
    Mugabe says:

    Blair, Mandy and Brown together with all their other socialist creeps can huff and puff and lie, smear, fiddle and cheat -BUT they will be unable to Spin History.

    The History, when written, will be forensic and demonstrate beyond all doubt that this was the worst ‘government’ ever – If their is any justice this will kill off the Labour party for 50 years.

    • 267
      mad fred 2 para retired says:

      50 years is not enough.

      I want Labour destroyed and consigned to the dustbin of political history – and if you had told me I would be writing that statement about them in 1997 I would have probably laughed at you.

      We should take a leaf out of the brave Iranian peoples handbook:

      “Death to Labour – Death to the Dictator”.

    • 408
      Sylvia's Mother says:

      It probably will – thank god.

  60. 246
    shrinking sack of shite says:

    Oh f**k I do so hope the mandy gang are not watching Sky news They could use it for a template as the next labour election agenda. What with a Supreme leader spouting forth 11 milion difference there is not case to answer,blah ,blah etc sounds like lie bore scripting. Oh off to hell in a handcart.

  61. 247
    Seth the pig farmer says:

    It’s time for the “Midsummer Revolution”

  62. 268
    Sir William Waad says:

    Woodcock? Dugher? (usually pronounced ‘do her’). Is this a Carry On film?

  63. 276
    chronic says:

    Iran`s supreme leader calls British Government “Treacherous”, how insightful, must have seen the expenses black out.

  64. 277
    Anon. says:

    Summer Revolution!
    Death to Labour, Conservatives, Lib Dems, to parliament as a whole.
    Death to the most corrupt government and parliament in history.
    Death to the anti-protest rules in Westminster.

  65. 279
    Iranian in London who wants to go back to Iran to be free says:

    Yes! Yes! Death to The Labour Party – Death to the Dictator Brown

  66. 284
    freddie flintoff says:

    is it to much to ask for honest mps just be straight we know you are going to fuck up every now and then we are not stupid , i mean why so many spin drs , the avrage bloke on street fucks up sometimes no one is perfect just be fucking straight with us is that to much to ask ?

    • 292
      chronic says:

      Straight, the new equal rights laws means that we have to accept queers as well, so bend over and take it.

    • 299
      chronic says:

      Straight, the new equal rights laws means that we have to accept arse bandits as well, so bend over and take it.

    • 372
      Lestweforget says:

      The ‘honest’ ones are the worst. To be honest would require a moral compass. Assuming the ‘honest’ members did have one,they just looked the other way,which makes them worse than the troughers.

      All scum ,one way or another

  67. 285
    JoeS says:

    Ben Bradshaw claims for gay mag “Attitude” and Hoon for a magnifying mirror

    Priceless

    • 291
      Charles E Hardwidge Senior says:

      Will Ben Bradshaw be reading this

      HM Revenue and Customs has been criticised for guidance it has released to assist homosexual and transgender taxpayers.

      The 20-page document has been labelled by critics an unnecessary use of taxpayers’ money. It advises people in civil partnerships about their tax allowance and inheritance tax thresholds, according to The Telegraph.

      It also gives advice to transgender people about claiming pensions under their old or new gender.

      Matthew Elliott, chief executive of the pressure group TaxPayers’ Alliance, said: ‘HMRC is meant to produce simple, clear guidance for everyone, not spend extra money going out of their way to target particular minorities.’

      5,000 copies of the booklet were printed at a cost of £1,536, and will be distributed at Pride London, the gay festival and march that takes place on July 4.

    • 348
      barefootcontessa says:

      Ben Bradshaw might rustle his sun kissed hair with his tanned effeminate hands if you say that. And, he might give you that fixed oh so wide smile – so that you can see his oh so beautifully whitened ( but unfortunately) irregular teeth. He is far too
      gorgeous to live! Guido, do you think you can keep up with him? oh sorry, I forgot,your expenses wouldn’t stretch to all that beautification.

  68. 297
    righty right wing (mrs) says:

    Morning all,

    I am fuming about the front page of the telegraphs website this morning.

    Ed Balls claiming back for a wreath for our war dead!!!!!

    It is beyond the pale now – they are destroying any belief the public had in democracy & Parliament.

    This jock junta, the cabal of thieves masqerading as a cabinet overseeing a rotten parliament of troughing pigs have no right to sit in the house any longer.

    Dissolve Parliament – ELECTION NOW!

    • 301
      Seth the pig farmer says:

      Join the Midsummer Revolution

      • 324
        Charles_E_Hardwidge says:

        Would love to – this seriously deranged Government needs to be kicked out of office? But how do we join? Who is organising it? Where? When? How? I am ready to sign up.

        • 397
          where did my job go? says:

          Summer this year is August 17th – 21st. So it must be the 19th then.

    • 394
      Anonymous says:

      I don’t know exactly how it happened, but Remembrance Sunday started as a by-the-people for-the-people memorial. Not many people know that now, as alja-Beeba annually concentrates on showing pictures of the Rt Hoons and troughers of every political persuasion laying their wreaths. Evidently someone realized there was mileage in that, and now everything is spun to show Big Brother as the fount of all ideas, of all goodness. Claiming wreaths on expenses simply follows from that – a professional expense of the nomenklatura. It’s not cynicism or hypocrisy – it’s callousness beyond belief, just as the mega-rich are avaricious beyond belief. I just want to puke.

      I have no idea if school kids are still taught the WW1 poem “Dulce et decorum est…” now that they have Holocaust Studies to learn.

      • 438
        barefootcontessa says:

        I dread Remembrance Day. All the hypocrites file out in their long black coats, lay their wreaths in extra solemn style, go away, then go to war all over again!

      • 445
        Dack Blog says:

        I teach it. And we compare the context to modern wars too – including Iraq/Afghanistan. I make the kids watch the news every morning and take newspapers in. You can engage some. Not their fault they’re fed a tide of shite most of the time.

    • 395
      Scunnered says:

      Ed Balls? Milliband? Hoon? Please use correct nomenclature – Labour, not just Jock – all a shower o’ sh1te!

  69. 302
    Anon. says:

    March on parliament and sack the bloody place.

  70. 305
    SS says:

    These houses built on flood plains should have their insurance cover withdrawn completely.Then the housing price problem would be solved at once.

  71. 309
    SS says:

    Gordon was mislead by his name.You can expect a Mr Anvilhorn to be appointed next.

  72. 314
    chronic says:

    Mr Anvilhorn?

  73. 316
    Dr Feelgood says:

    O/T again, but BBC News just reported that Downing St. have criticised the striking workers at Lindsey. Talk about being on the wrong side of public opinion.

    And, I thought this was supposed to be a Labour government. No wonder the toytown nazis are getting votes from disenchanted Labour voters – but the silly bastards try and blame the Conservatives.

    • 320
      freddie flintoff says:

      thats what gordon does has the choice between wrong and right and chooses wrong everytime

    • 325
      Swallow Sidecars says:

      Watch the price of petrol/diesel rocket – bar stewards!

      • 393
        where did my job go? says:

        Nothing like a bit of social unrest to raise fuel tax revenue. That will be a few £m off the national debt then…. and a possible excuse to postpone an election. Looks like its a win/win for Gordo then. The *astard.

    • 327
      british_irish_anon says:

      Pravda BBC in their coverage of the attacks in Belfast on the Romanian families neglected to broach the real issue with immigrants in Belfast – there are no jobs for the locals, the schools are crap, the hospitals are poor, no dentists & public services are stretched to the limit.

      So why did the liberal elite think it was a good idea to ethnically cleanse the locals from an area and introduce hundreds of Romanians?

      It is not rocket science why nationalism and racism are on the rise.

      The left wing and the liberal elite are to blame – not the people who have to live with their insane immigration and economic policies.

      There is much more trouble ahead – especially as the national broadcaster is now deliberately towing the Govrnment line and refusing to report difficult news that is outside of its political remit and ideology.

      • 359
        barefootcontessa says:

        Esther Ransome seemed to know all about the problems in N.Ireland vis a vis the Romanians. She was TOTALLY DISGUSTED with the people who had ‘been bad to them’. Gave a very simplistic reply, as did all the panelists – except for once p toynbee. They were all as usual paranoid about racism, and didn’t inquire into any problems that the society might have there.

        • 362
          barefootcontessa says:

          Dimbleby’s programme tv last night, forgot to mention context.

        • 370
          british_irish_anon says:

          If these glitzy media kommentariat elites had foreigners taking their jobs, houses, kids school places, dentists, doctors they would understand.

          As it is they just call us racists.

          Thats ok – we accept the slur now, and we have someone to vote for to match the tag they have given us – and they are thre one party I can vote for who I know will really annoy the hell out of the meida and political elites – and the state arm broadcaster and chief propagandists for new labour and the eu immigration project, the BBC.

        • 381
          Mildred Fish says:

          There’s no excuse for violent attacks.

        • 420
          british_irish_anon says:

          Mildred,

          I am not condoning the attacks, i am just stating that you cannot pursue a liberal immigration policy in places where the indigenous people are suffering from a lack of jobs and investment and community resources.

          We cannot deny the true feelings of those who are being forced into a position where they are called racists for trying to protect what little they have.

          Calling people racist to silence debate is done with – the million or so people who voted for national socialsit in the EU election has fiormly kicked that liberal conspiracy into touch for ever. People are no longer afraid to vote for them.

        • 439
          barefootcontessa says:

          Addition to my previous comment…….. Think red squirrel grey squirrel. Human beings are mere animals but they delude themselves into thinking
          that they are something superior.

      • 409
        Harland & Wolff says:

        60% of jobs are in the Public Sector…..nuff said!!

      • 455
        Summer_Breeze says:

        It is forgotten, or more likely ignored, by those in power, that on every sink estate in Britain, there are decent, honest people imprisoned in their own homes by chavs/drug dealers and the like.
        They too have windows smashed, are abused and attacked in the streets, their hard earned cars are stolen and burnt out etc, but funny how nobody bends over bacvkwards to speak up on their behalves. Churches are not opened to offer them sanctuary, the housing depts don’t rush to find alternative accomodation and dibble don’t turn out in their thousands threatening to prosecute the miscreants and trouble makers.
        Maybe it’s because they is white?

        • 459
          Shithead says:

          Precisely, and where I live in North Yorkshire the gyppos get away with anything and everything, including driving offences that would put me and you in the slammer. The police response: “we can’t chase them, Squire, because they’re of no fixed abode.”

        • 464
          Summer_Breeze says:

          You can’t be too far from me then S.H. I’m just up the road and round the corner a little :-) ( Teesside lol )

    • 328
      zobbit says:

      Broooon the Looooon has lost the Plot Shoot the Twat

    • 330
      Charles_E_Hardwidge says:

      All the power and refinery workers in the country should down tools and stay out until the Prime Mentalist resigns and a general election is called!

    • 335
      Charles_E_Hardwidge says:

      The whiff of insurrection is in the air – I can smell it.
      Brown Out! Labour Out! Clear out the troughing hoons!

    • 350
      Dr Feelgood says:

      Labour aren’t going to win any votes by being seen to side with a French oil company against British workers.

      I’m all in favour of free movement of workers and residency within the EU, but it shouldn’t be a just mechanism to dump cheap labour on us. We need a level playing field, but exteme left-wing protectionism as advocated by the British Nazi Party isn’t the answer.

  74. 323
    Dr Gordon Brown says:

    First they came for the press advisers
    and I did not speak out – because I was not a press adviser.
    Then they came for the ministers
    and I did not speak out – because I was not a minister.

    Then they came for me –
    oh f*ck it, they’ve come for me.

  75. 341
    U Nacho says:

    If I get the old chap chopped off can I claim my pension earlier

    • 363

      No, but if you register as a fucking thieving pikey soap dodger you can get immediate free NHS treatment, including cosmetic surgery and breast enlargements.

      The Penguin

    • 427
      Infanta of Castile says:

      It probably depends if you were born before or after April 1955. Women born after that date will not get their OA pension until they are 65 – that is assuming that there will be any pesnions by then.

  76. 352
    Anonymous says:

    Brown claimed for Sky Tv, Gardening, Laundry and “Domestic Services”. He signed to say these were necessary in performing his job as an MP. If they are what they say they are – and remember that he doesn’t need a second home or somewhere to stay becuase we give him a house (houses?) anyway – why on earth does he think we should pay for them?

    Flipping his london flat onto Mrs Brown was an obviosu tax-planning move as well – nice thing for the man in charge of Hm Treasury and HMR&C to be trying on – great example to the rest of us etc etc etc ….Just resign.

    • 355
      chronic says:

      Due to his optical situation surely he only has to pay half for sky tv.

    • 423
      Sacha Lottovem says:

      This is a thing I want, that none of the MSM seem to have asked of any MP so far. I want to hear an MP attempt to answer (or rather avoid answering the question “How, exactly and in detail, was {whatever} ‘wholly, exclusively and necessarily incurred to allow you to stay over night away from your only or main home for the purpose of performing your Parliamentary duties’?”

  77. 353
    CARRY ON GOVERNING says:

    Cracking good larff

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/8107603.stm

    Devine’s claim sounds to be “It wisnae me”…..

    However, there are some areas of expenses which I’m almost inclined to applaud:

    “First Minister Alex Salmond defended a £14,100 legal fee claim for an attempt to impeach Tony Blair as prime minister, over the Iraq war.
    Mr Salmond, said he claimed for £790 of the total cost, which was shared among nine members. ”

    Guido – focus on Teflon Tony and why “every little helps” – HIM.

    • 371
      Chartered Accountant says:

      I believe Salmond and the other guys’ legal expenses were legit.

      They had a good case to argue, but this was an exceptional (almost unprecedented) situtation and without advice from a specialist Counsel they’d have been just flattened by the Government’s lawyers at the outset.

      While they didn’t suceed, they struck a blow for accountable government and against future reckless military adventures.

      • 405
        ScotsHomeRule says:

        We would love Alex salmond to call a referendum on Scottish independence. If the rest of the country got to vote, he would win by a landslide and we would be rid of Gordon Brown.

      • 460
        Shithead says:

        I’d have contributed hard cash willingly for any attempt to try and nail that lying poseur Bliar. I still would.

  78. 354
    tenpin says:

    Guido, McBride left? I don’t think so…..If you have paid any attention to the political village in recent weeks McBride never really went away and he is now back advising the government (but not Gordon as we were led to believe at PMQs this weeK).

    Don’t claim scalps you have not taken – this government doesn’t sack its cronies no matter how bad the sleaze.

    • 358
      freddie flintoff says:

      gordon thinks that we forget things after a few weeks ala boom and bust

    • 360
      chronic says:

      the “………..Pride” attacks on this site would support your View.

      • 376
        Nanny speaking says:

        If only the contributors of this site would please stop being baited into action by cut and paste Labour trolls it would really make my day.

  79. 364
    It doesn't add up... says:

    o/t: The resign petition has now reached 68,007. There are some interesting targets ahead. 69,109 will see it climb another place in the all time list, and the next places are only a little further up at 70,203 and 70,663 – which would take it into the all time top 10.

    • 377
      Link deficiency says:

      Link?

    • 426
      My Petition Rejected says:

      Dear…

      I’m sorry to inform you that your petition has been rejected.

      Your petition was classed as being in the following categories:

      * Outside the remit or powers of the Prime Minister and Government.

      Your petition reads:

      We the undersigned petition the Prime Minister to:

      “Publish all MP’s expenses claims for the last decade on the internet in full and unredacted.

      If you trawl through newspaper back issues there appears to be evidence of a long running and highly organised conspiracy by MP’s to defraud the public on a truly epic scale, totaling perhaps hundreds of millions of pounds.

      The sheer size and scale of the fraud, the calculated manner in which it has been carried out, the methods used and the similarity of the excuses all indicate that this is a carefully executed criminal conspiracy involving hundreds of public servants over the last decade.

      I therefore request that all MP’s expenses claims for the last decade be published on the internet in full and unredacted.”

      — the ePetitions team =

      • 450
        Wholly, necessarily and exclusively says:

        How about

        “in order to restore the reputation of parliament and to regain public confidence in elected politicians, we call on the Prime Minister

        1. to publish all MPs expenses that are currently held on record, no matter how old;

        2. to hold a public enquiry into the running of the fees office to establish who were the ‘directing minds’ behind the operation

        3. to abandon attempts to reform parliament until the voting public has had the chance to confirm in office those it wishes to see in office

        4. to pledge that no further peers will be added to the Cabinet until a mechanism exists for them to be removed from the Lords at the conclusion of their time in Government

        or something …

    • 461
      Shithead says:

      A measly 70,000? It just shows how many of the population are brain-dead.

      • 468
        "For the restless, not the true believers, this one's for you.." says:

        No, I believe that it shows how afraid of ZNL that people are reluctant to give their address and so won’t sign….

  80. 374
    Mercy, Mercy, Mercy says:

    You would think that being smeared in shit a thousands times might make MP’s want to call it a day. Apparently not.

    Another bucket of shit anyone?

  81. 378

    I’m sure it will have been the other one. I remember Woody from his time as Hutton’s spad at BERR. A bit ineffectual perhaps (Williams was the brains of the operation) – but in his defence, a nice guy and not in the business of sticking the knife in.

  82. 384
    Barbie Tourette says:

    ZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz…………………….

  83. 399
    sd says:

    And what connections does John Woodcock have to Barrow-in-Furness?

    Would the local party really be that stupid as to appoint him, and would the public be dumb enough to vote for a parachuted-in Brownite henchman with absolutely no connection to the place?!

    Another Labour seat lost! Well done John Woodcock. Con-bloody-gratulations.

  84. 401
    McGroom says:

    Do we really expect the Labour party grandees of Barrow and Furness to select a No. 10 infected spin-meister and cabinet enforcer that would make Tebbit blanch as the best person to represent their interests. Ed Balls is hardly a stellar role model.

    Even though Woodcock is just a SpAd, I am sure his expenses (and his wifes) would make interesting reading for the selection committee.

    At Edinburgh University, Woodcock used to run Labour Students while his wife ran the NUS. Both are Scottish career politicos. Woodcock just wants to be an MP and doesn’t appear to have had any interest in the coastal Lake District before becoming John Hutton’s SPAD in 2006.

    Why would Barrow and Furness want Woodcock.

    Mind you Hutton was an Essex boy done good as a lawyer, before two failed attempts to get elected in the North West.

  85. 404
    Anonymous says:

    The tories have officially complained that Alan Sugar is on the telly (can’t be on the telly and a minister).

    It’s an odd thing to complain about; perhaps they should instead complain about Alan Sugar giving over a million quid to the labour party, and then getting shit loads of dosh in government contracts and being given a lordship/ministerial-role where he can peddle his own company? To me that’s the conflict of interest, not being on the fucking telly.

  86. 411
    Steve Expat says:

    Did Gordon lie to Parliament over contact with McBride?

    Alex Singleton at the DT seems to think so
    http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/alex_singleton/blog/2009/06/19/downing_street_official_leaks_the_closeness_of_gordon_brown_and_damian_mcbride

    Before Mr Brown appeared on the Andrew Marr Show on May 31, he discussed his lines with Mr McBride by text message. This surely puts him at the heart of Gordon Brown’s inner circle.

  87. 416
    Anonymous says:

    Steve Expat says:
    June 19, 2009 at 1:15 pm
    Did Gordon lie to Parliament over contact with McBride?

    Alex Singleton at the DT seems to think so
    http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/alex_singleton/blog/2009/06/19/downing_street_official_leaks_the_closeness_of_gordon_brown_and_damian_mcbride

    “Before Mr Brown appeared on the Andrew Marr Show on May 31, he discussed his lines with Mr McBride by text message. This surely puts him at the heart of Gordon Brown’s inner circle.

    Reply
    The PM would never lie. He is ever so transpaarent.

    • 428
      Mythomaniac says:

      It seems to me that our Prime Minister is now in continuous lie mode.

      There is a medical term for this:

      Mythomania, also known as pseudologia fantastica or pathological lying) is a condition involving compulsive lying by a person with no obvious motivation. The affected person might believe their lies to be truth, and may have to create elaborate myths to reconcile them with other facts

      http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_medical_term_for_a_pathological_liar

  88. 419
    MP's to get a pay rise says:

    MPs who have been shamed and humiliated by the revelations about their expenses could be in line for a pay rise of up to 10 per cent.

    And the body that sets their pay is to consider a differential pay scale which would mean those MPs with outside interests would get less than the rest.

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article6534773.ece

    • 421
      They're taking the piss and then charging us for it says:

      Is the timing of this announcement another almighty cockup, or another attempt to fuel riots on the streets of Britain?

      • 429
        grandma B says:

        I think that Gordon Brown needs a prolonged booing on every possible occasion. similar to the one he got in France. Gordon is living in cloud cuckoo land and doesn’t realize how much he is disliked. Peter Hain got the shock of his life on Question Time when he realized that most of the audience despised him and his Government’s policies.

      • 432
        Idle chatter says:

        You people are all piss and wind – talk talk talk about marching on Parliament but you just sit at home on your PC’s writing about how bad it is – why not take some action?

        • 433
          grandma B says:

          Chill.

          Some of the blogs are very funny and you obviously get a bit of enjoyment out of them.

        • 444
          Infanta of Castile says:

          are you the troll who used to post here as Idle?

    • 446
      Infanta of Castile says:

      Great – so the 22 year olds with a degree in PPE and a relative in the party aristocracy will be paid more than the 40-60 somethings who have actually earned a living outside parliament and have some sort of expertise which could benefit the business of parliament.

      There has to be a decision about what kinds of outside interests are permissible and what must be declared rather the ludicrous idea that a person whose outside interest is doing the school run should be paid more than – say – a doctor who does a couple of surgeries a week to keep up to date while serving as a back-bench MP.

      • 449
        grandma B says:

        Don’t know whether you’re talking to me or not, but the answer is in the negative.

        Over and out.

  89. 424

    Dear Adrian Prole

    “Adrian who?”

    Sorry for getting the name mixed up but who cares.

    “Oh, so you didn’t teach proper subjects, then?”

    Like face painting?

    “Like the rest of your lies, I don’t believe you ever taught anything”.

    Such jealously is an ugly trait.

    Did you serve burgers at Yoona?

    “Your last paragraph says everything we need to know about you”.

    I am making a fair observation no need to squeal like a bitch!

    “Go back to your own site where nobody is listening”.

    Tut tut, just because you don’t have the balls to start your own blog with your own name don’t try to project your failure on me loser.

    “You come across as being a spotty little ‘erbert who is pumped full of his own self importance”.

    Get a mop and do the floor.

    “Are you, by any chance, sectioned in an NHS establishment?”

    Why; you need a room mate?

    Yours sincerely

    George Laird
    The Campaign for Human Rights at Glasgow University

  90. 436
    A Silent Emission of Bowel Gas says:

    At a recent audience, the Pope told me in confidence that Gordon Brown had asked him to use his influence to get Jesus Christ to be his new spin doctor, to help him win the election.

    Apparently Jesus replied that that kind of miracle was way beyond him these days, and that, anyway, the twat deserved to be fucking crucified.

    • 456
      Canary Wharf Rat says:

      No, What JC actually said was I can heal the sick but have lost the ability to raise the dead (thanks to Bette Midler)

      • 465
        Summer_Breeze says:

        ” (thanks to Bette Midler) ”

        lol, that’s the only joke I can ever remember. It’s a cracker though ;-)

  91. 437
    Ever Vigilant says:

    Stil nothing from Mandleson about the funding of his London house .

    In 2004 an almost penniless Mandleson had to scrounge about £3,000 from the UK taxpayers in order to tart up his semi-hovel in HARTLEPOOLbefore taking residence in BRUSSELS.

    Two years later he managed to buy a LONDON house for £2,400,000,

    It is beyond belief that he could have saved more than£300,000 in the intervening period.

    It is also improbable that he could have obtained a mortgage of £2,100,000
    especially considering his previous record of mortgage fraud .

    This man is a senior minister and we are entitled to ask for an explanation especially because of his friendship with Deripaska for whom Mandleson did
    did an incredible favour,benefiting the Russian to the tune of £50.000,000,

    Mandleson has refused to discuss this which is suspicious . I would have thought that an honest man woul;d be eager to explain his finances in these circumstances and his continued silence tempts the conclusion that he is hiding something and is therefore frightened of something.

    This conduct does not align easily with the new labour mantra ,”nothing to fear if nothing to hide”

    I will persist in my attempts to get an answer or better still,some evidence that he took a bribe.

    2

    • 442
      barefootcontessa says:

      Yes, but he has friends in high places! and low.

    • 458
      Shithead says:

      How about asking Plod to investigate the wonderful “Lord” specifically?

    • 473

      You need to lay a formal complaint then Police must investigate, would help if the person laying the complaint was standing next to a hack who just happened to glance at the written document and then independently splashed it all over the redtops.. this would also give the CPS a strong steer as to how to conduct the subsequent prosecution.

  92. 443
    CARRY ON GOVERNING says:

    HMG PRESS RELEASE:

    New phrase to replace obsolete “Extraordinary Rendition”

    “Extraordinary Redaction” —

    will be issued with high frequency in all media channels with immediate effect. The bureau believes the effect will be to pacify the revolting peasants when they associate the emergency announcements due to be released next week.
    In all instances, non-approved journalists will be indentified and **extraordinarily redacted** as if they were dissident active cells. This will deflect all criticism from expense-related claims with edited information being illegally printed without authorisation from the central office of information.

  93. 448
    Wholly, necessarily and exclusively says:

    Sky says Uddin has confirmed she is subject of investigation

  94. 451
    Anonymous says:

    +++++ Breaking News +++++

    MPs Face Full Police Probe Over Expenses

    Although Sky News website says that names of those to be investigated ( Believed at the mo to be 4 M.P.’s and one peer ) have yet to be released, the names Morley, Chaytor, Chapman, Wiggin and one baroness by the name of Uddin are mentioned in relation to the story. :-)

    • 453
      Summer_Breeze says:

      D’oh, silly me!
      In all the excitement to report the breaking news, I forgot to check that my name was in the appropriate box before hitting the submit button. * sigh *

  95. 462
    Warrick Hunt says:

    Brown: I Could Walk Away From Being P M Tomorrow, “…be best for my children”

    http://www.housepricecrash.co.uk/forum/index.php?showtopic=117756

    Worth checking out if true. Guido off the sauce mate and on the fones please!

    Oh and find out wot McBrides up to and finnish the phucker please.

    Warrick (BF Forum Daddy)

    • 466
      Summer_Breeze says:

      ” Brown: I Could Walk Away From Being P M Tomorrow, “…

      Don’t let us stand in your way – please go! and don’t let the door hit you on your big, fat, lazy ass on your way out!

  96. 470
    The REAL George Laird says:

    If any one has more dirt on Woodcock please keep it coming

  97. 472

    Thought I might apply to get on the Tory list, so dashed off an e-mail to Dave , thinking well in a few weeks might get a response . WITHIN FOUR HOURS, Conservative head office have sent me a zip file with electronic application form and referee forms (you need 3). The covering message makes it very clear that previous political experience is not required.

    Anyone else thinking of doing the same the e-mail is:

    candidateenquiries@conservatives.com

    The co-ordinator is Gareth Fox 30 Millbank SW1P4DP

  98. 474
    Anonymous says:

    Brown honestly thinks he’s on a Mission from God; there’s no way he’s leaving unless he’s physically dragged away. Even losing a general election (if there is one) won’t change that.

    If he loses the election he’ll still stay in the post saying it’s “in the good of the country”, and his fellow labour MPs will support that because it’ll mean keeping their seats even if they lose their seat in an election.

    He’s completely flipped. He needs to be sectioned. We need a general election, and the police/army need to be involved in all those processes, including physically ejecting the de-elected labour MPs from the houses of parliament (and brown from downing street).




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