June 3rd, 2009

Telegraph’s Porter Taking Copy from Downing Street Again

Porter-Smears-BlearsAccording to  the Telegraph’s Andy Porter (a close friend of Damian McBride) “Hazel Blears’ resignation as Communities Secretary was partly triggered by the discovery that she had allegedly avoided paying capital gains tax on the sale of another property.” This is Downing Street back up to its old tricks, getting dirt on enemies, putting the dirt into the public domain via friendly Lobby hacks.  Guido has been told by a source that the same “Cabinet Office compliance unit” that found out about Blears’ other property has more expenses dirt on Alastair Darling.  That is being used to menace Darling, just in case he gets any Geoffrey Howe type ideas.

Nick Brown is the “shit-kicker in chief” according to a well connected Blairite, Watson is still unofficially doing his old enforcer job, even the semi-detached Douglas Alexander is back on the bunker team.  Blairites emphasise to Guido that they are going to keep silent until the close of the polls tomorrow at 10pm.  That leaves the Brownies a free run to have the mother of all factional fights to save their fuhrer.


  1. 1
    Dick says:

    Sub ed – ‘just in case he gets and Geoffrey Howe type ideas’.

    • 5
    • 44
      Cromwell says:

      These Political Parties have ended up being like a good spew after a chicken madras and a good night on the P–s. They Look all the same with the same bits in but most of all they smell the same. infact they stink. These lot have sold our democratic system down the river. for a plug and a few extra grand. At least Stalin or Hilter had grander ideas.

    • 48
      Dr. Sexy says:

      Boom boom let me hear you say WAYYYY OOOOO!!!………..

      • 97
        Baroness Sexy says:

        Wayyyyyyyyyyyy oooooooooooooooooo!!!

      • 227
        dave the rave says:

        Let me hear you say ACEEEEEEDDDDDD!!!!!
        Sorry, I got a bit carried away with an early 90s flashback.

      • 772
        Harri says:

        Money. money money, its an MPs world, money , money money.

        Aceeeeeeeeeeeeeeed pump up the volume .

        Excuse me Mr officer … murderer

        i iz a lyrical gangster … murderer

    • 134
      Peter Grimes says:

      But the Daily Labourgraph will, eventually, publish any further details that are available regarding Badger Darling’s CG’s, surely. If No10 have it, the Labourgraph has it!

      What possible leverage can No10 have?

      • 1003
        going down the pan says:

        none: darling will go ! but did you see how smug brown was today . this trickie bastard has something up his sleeve ,how about handing back to blair ? he looked relaxed and calm today whats he up to ???

    • 337
      MI5 says:


      Quite ORWELLIAN really…

      • 367
        Egbert Hayessen says:

        Worse : “CABINET OFFICE COMPLIANCE UNIT” = Volksgerichtshof

        • 716
          Anonymous says:

          Volksgerichtshof! It has such a wonderfully Harmanesque ring to it

        • 746
          Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

          Stand aside I can translate this for you: Peoples vill be gotton rid of waffa

        • 1050
          Master Baiter says:

          Latin? Pfft!

          Just cos you went to a tory school don’t make you better

        • 1143
          Anonymous says:

          Nope, but not supporting scum who have attempted to turn this country into one big prison makes us far better than gullible little weasels like you MB.

      • 500
        dirtyden says:

        Yeah, but there’s an agent provocateur in it leaking like mad and paralysing the government. And….


        Brown really is bonkers, isn’t he.

        • 590
          Benny says:

          it’s not an agent provocateur…

          The whole Goverment is pissing and leaking like a sieve…

          Never seen so much incontinence

          We need a huge delivery of Wollas’ nappies please…

        • 650
          Harri says:

          As mad as a fucking hatter !

          And as pissed off as a bulldog chewing on a wasp whilst licking piss off a stinging nettle.

        • 789
          Harri says:

          Totaly certifiable !

          Mc Mental has gone way beyond madness, with a bit of luck he might go into one and and axe everyone to death at PMQ’s.

        • 1070
          Tea Room Powder Puff Plot says:

          Well that worked a treat.

    • 547
      Anonymous says:






      • 550
        Benny says:

        Ignore the post above

        Another McBride fraud !!

      • 581
        Anonymous says:

        Paxman is a luvvie Hoon

        • 593
          Benny says:


        • 597
          Boris says:

          Paxman is preparing his multi-millionaire’s retirement thanks in large part to what the Taxpayer has paid him…

          But he does still love himself still in the Mirror even if others dont’ !!

          Like the awful obsessive attention seeker Rantzen…

        • 611
          Anonymous says:

          BBC make me sick. I hope the boy David has some plan for shafting these bastards after the GE (which hopefully be in July sometime!)

        • 687
          thick as thieves says:

          Paxman’s pants, innit?

        • 908
          Don't put your X next to a trough box says:

          July 2010

      • 731

        16 times he refused to tell the truth.

        16 fucking times he lied.

        One after the other.

        Do NOT vote Tory tomorrow. They are thieves, frauds, cheats and liars. As proven by the above

        • 754
          Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

          Hague is too vague on this and the Lisbon treaty referendum for my vote. He had more sweat than than a whale

        • 900
          Harri says:

          Hague used to be indisicive !

          And now he is not too sure.

        • 1010
          going down the pan says:

          ive told you a million times dont exaggerate

      • 984
        Don't put your X next to a trough box says:

        William Hague, SHAFTED BY CAMERON RIP 2009, probably the best PM we never had. His class made Cameron look SHITE.!!!!!!!

        • 1009
          Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

          Silly me. Hague, Redwood & anti Uk being in europe would have had my blessing. Sadly not to be. Probably. Cameron is just messing it up. UKIP for me and whatever is the future. I feel we have nothing to lose and much to look forward to.

        • 1013
          going down the pan says:

          here !here ! the only tory i would ever vote for .

    • 1119
      Emmanuel Goldstein says:

      Quite apt really: BBC’s “In Our Time” is on right now on this election day morning and it is discussing the destruction of another scotch anti-democratic unelected tyrant who almost ruined England, namely King Charles I.

      Links here:
      MP3 download (after 11:0am): http://www.bbc.co.uk/podcasts/series/iot/
      Main In Our Time web page: http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b006qykl

    • 1141
      Anonymous says:

      A little song I wrote and performed recently… Enjoy!

      Hazel the Ginger Fraudster (to the tune of Puff the Magic Dragon)

      Hazel the ginger fraudster lived a life of ease
      and flicked between three properties paid for by you and me
      All the tabloid papers loved that rascal Hazel
      As she bought TVs and furniture and all that she was able

      Hazel the ginger fraudster lived a life of ease
      and flicked between three properties paid for by you and me
      Hazel the ginger fraudster lived a life of ease
      and flicked between three properties paid for by you and me

      In Europe she would travel, her life a fairy tale
      as she lied to con the tax man out of tax from her house sale
      No Youtube, she insisted knock on doors – That’s my game
      And ministers would turn blind eyes when Hazel made her claims

      Hazel the ginger fraudster lived…

      Receipts they live for ever, but not so ministers
      Commons seats and cabinet posts go to those who most deserve
      One grey night it happened; the papers told the hordes
      and Hazel the twisted minister had to cease her scandalous fraud

      Hazel the ginger fraudster lived…

      Her head was bent in sorrow, she tried to shift the blame
      Hazel no longer commanded trust and failed to clear her name
      Without the public’s trust, and support she needed most
      Hazel that twisted minister resigned her cabinet post

      Hazel the ginger fraudster lived…

  2. 2
    • 12
      Hugh Janus says:

      A matter for the police, surely? Ah no, I forgot, they don’t usually do political wrongdoing, do they? Not after their bungled Damian Green investigation and the numerous alleged crooks currently getting away with some major expenses fiddles which would have had anyone else banged up long ago.

      • 221
        Postal Vote says:

        Welldone Buttox!

        Postal votes will be the big scandal at the next general elections. Labour has honed its postal voting skills in various local elections, last year’s Glenrothes byelection (where the marked voters register went missing and view on counting tables was obstructed) and very recent candidate selections, including the Gould problem with the broken into ballot box in labour hq.

        It’s obvious that the beeb, the guardian and the mirror will not publish about the postal voting dangers since they are in bed with labour. But unfortunately other media outlets do not seem that keen either.

        • 232
          Reg Buttox says:

          all credit to Craig Murray

        • 510
          Mr Ned says:

          We need to have volunteers at the counts with cameras to record everything. Any shenanigans should be posted to every political blog on the net.

    • 289
      The Wasp says:

      Definitely something for Guido to look into – especially if it means dragging Jack Straw into the mess.

      I agree, postal vote rigging will be rampant within Labour in order to “fix” the next General Election.

      It’s worse than Zimbabwe.

      • 315
        Churchill's Cattleprod says:

        Sorry, Mr Straw is far too busy drafting up his resignation speech right now to look into this matter.

        Will the last member of the cabinet to leave Number 10 please switch Sarah’s rabbit off.

      • 724
        Robert Mugabe says:

        Credit where credit is due

        You Brits are getting quite good at this sort of stuff

    • 352
      The "Angry Aberdonian" says:

      The sad reality of this scandal is that no media outlet would dare investigate it for fear of being branded racist.

    • 549
      King Richard II says:

      Bring me the head of Jack Straw!

  3. 3
    Hugh Janus says:

    No surprises there, then.

    • 255
      Charles E Hardwidge says:


      One of the big problems with parliament is politicians are so obsessed with power and populism they can forget to be professional. Labour have a problem with management just as much as the Tories are nasty, and the Liberals have no spine. If they spent less time investing in their egos they’d generate better outcomes.

      I watched some coverage of the Last Labour conference. It was a much more well produced affair than they’re used to but the usual suspects started whining about control freakery, pimping their hairshirts on the fringe, or running off with their mouths in elevators. It’s like they’re scared of change and have a death cult problem.

      I’ve lost the link to it but there was a good article on how Star Wars made it from concept to the screen. While George Lucas vision was a bit hazy he had good team leaders and staff who helped bring their skills and enthusiasm to the project to make it succeed way, way better than was originally conceived. Labour need to learn this.

      © Zenboy Buttockclencher 2009™

      • 278
        resurgemus says:

        Totally agree Charles. Events need to be organised professionally to impress voters – perhaps if people were better co-ordinated in say brown shirts with catchy logos on their sleeves, and with a torch-lit rally in front of the leader all carefully recorded on a DVD with a catchy title like “Triumph des Willens” ,and black clad security guards to deal with troublemakers etc. for the next 1000 years.

        • 307
          Charles E Hardwidge says:

          I can’t speak for “the left”, whoever they are, but Gordon Brown has prioritised R&D and welfare in the teeth of difficult economics, Cruddas and Compass get jobs and fairness, and Purnell gets “invest in loss”. That’s a clear and unfied strategy that’s good for the country, and the Tories have no answer to it.

          You might want to leave the propoganda and bad mouthing to your masters. Their big claims and nasty attitude isn’t something worth following and, I can assure you, if you think you’re in the Tory club, boy, are you in for a shock. That’s the oldest Tory party trick in the book but when things get tough you’ll find out exactly what side of the line you’re on. You’re just collateral.

          © Zenboy Buttockclencher 2009™

        • 332
          resurgemus says:

          Gordon Brown has promised everything imaginable – ” an end to boom and bust ” – and delivered on nothing .

          People are worse off through his mismanagement of the economy and his trashing of the national finances.

          Unlike you, I have no master and do not slavishly follow a party line. You might even like to give thinking for yourself a try, then you could go out and get a life instead of writing apologies for sad-cases like Brown.

        • 338
          Anonymous says:


          I’ve spend a professional lifetime in R&D. Pure private sector – scientific civil service – government sponsored (UK and EU) within large companies and SMEs – the lot. The idea that Gordon Brown has usefully invested in R&D is tractor production statistics style fantasy

        • 507
          Sarah says:

          I think they’ve got the “black clad security guards to deal with troublemakers” – remember Walter Wolfgang’s removal from the Labour Party Conference? It’s the only thing they’ve got right – those peacenik, Jewish, octogenarians are a real threat!

        • 1035
          going down the pan says:

          charles :would you like to knock on my door with your red and yellow rosette ? first i will educate you in the ways of the world , then you will be able to sample one of your partys fantastic hospital a+e departments .

      • 316
        Cassandra King says:

        “labour have a problem with management” ??? er…. they are a bunch of twats!

        You cannot polish a turd and you cannot flog a maggot infested corpse of a party with a flashy video/conference.

        When will the political class learn that its not about presentation and gloss, its about substance and delivery.

        The labour party is the austin allegro of political parties, built by lazy and stupid layabouts led by nasty marxist agitators and slick crooks.


      • 377
        Chewbacca's Hairy Ring says:

        Ha ha hilarious effort to somehow make the Labour Party learn from George Lucas. I work in the film industry and Lucas is a well known control freak and mini tyrant.

        “His vision was a bit hazy he had good team leaders and staff who helped bring their skills and enthusiasm to the project.”

        My god are you 11? Is this the kind of shit you talk about on your tragic sci-fi blogs when you’re not jacking off?

        Run along and vote for Gordon tomorrow – and may the force be with you knobwidge.

      • 402
        Sungei Patani says:

        Interesting that you believe that Labour have problems with management. Government is all about the management of the economy; management of the education system; management of the police and justice; management of the prisons; management of the armed services et al.

        No wonder the country is in such a mess with clearly incompetent management running it.

      • 409
        Cjamesk says:

        Charles E Hardwidge my god, things that bad on your friend Nick “toenails” Robinsons Blog??

        Get ready for a full on socialist utopian dream everybody!

      • 1076
        William says:

        What we certainly don’t need is ‘professional’ politicians.

        What we do need is a few ‘amateurs’ who have lived in the real world, developed successful businesses, improved schools and hospitals and don’t belong to any agenda-driven parties.

  4. 4
    • 297
      Sean Ryder of the Happy Wednesday! says:


    • 339
      D. Cameron says:


    • 609
      Gooey Blob says:

      Still can’t see it happening. Brown will have to go voluntarily, and that is unlikely.

      In any case, who would replace him as caretaker and whipping boy? The only candidates of the calibre to do the job of PM still have a future in politics ahead of them. Does Jack Straw really fancy the prospect of early retirement from front-line politics in a few months? We might easily end up with a nutty left-wing backbencher for the next few months, and despite Brown’s obvious flaws, that could be far worse for all of us. Be very careful what you wish for…

      The process of rebuilding and modernisation of Labour will only begin after the next election, and that is the time when Johnson, Harman or Purnell will want to move. Going for the top job now will be too early and they will suffer as William Hague did when he became Tory leader before his time.

      One other thought – replacing their leader without holding a general election will increase the pressure for a general election. The public are already calling for it, and so are the media. If Brown goes, the volume will be turned up to an unbearable level, and the new leader won’t get much of a honeymoon if he doesn’t call one for the Autumn. I’m not sure backbenchers want to hasten their own demise in this way, when they can still carry on for another 11 months or so.

      • 701
        thick as thieves says:

        stop being such a sp@stic gooey blob.
        Alan Johnson is on stand-by.
        you dopey c’unt!
        try to keep up old man.

        • 819
          Anonymous says:

          Johnson isn’t mad enough to want the job now.

          I hear John McDonnell is being readied as whipping boy for the Autumn election.

        • 925
          Perversity Outreach Officer says:

          How come you think the terms spatic and cripple are ok to be bandied about as insults Mr Thick?

        • 930
          thick as thieves says:

          fuck off cripple.

        • 978
          Harri says:

          FFS ! Just how low can you get , how very very dare you take the piss.

          A man walks into a pub with a dwarf with learning difficulties under his arm, the landord tells him… look how many more times do i have to tell you, stop bringing that in here… it aint big and it aint clever !

          Have a heart for fucks sake .

  5. 6
    Tony Blair says:

    I am on tenterhooks waiting for comments at 1 minute past 10 tomorrow night.

    • 299
      srting up the war criminals says:

      Why’s that Tone?
      Are you being hanged in the morning?

      • 366
        Charles E Hardwidge says:

        This “left” and “right” ding dong is like watching engineering and marketing tear each other apart. Somwhere in there people might like to focus on shipping a product and customer service. Politicians (and Labour politicians) are nothing special whatever their *sigh* ideology or status *rolls eyes* as MPs. Nobody is “entitled” to win but nor is crashing and burning inevitable. People are looking like prize tools at the moment and need to focus on getting over themselves.

        © Zenboy Buttockclencher 2009™

        • 407
          Sungei Patani says:

          It has always been thus in the Labour Party. Tony Blair managed to keep the lid on it but they have now reverted to type.

          The fact is that the “Comrades” hate each other.

        • 425
          MrPeregrination says:

          There’s certainly one person looking like a prize tool.

        • 446
          Yoda says:

          Chuckie,Dear Boy…I don’t know what cowboy organisations you have ever worked for,apart from video game makers….but Engineering and Marketing in any decent organisation have a joint goal..that is to produce the most technically competent product which has customer appeal. Engineering sort out the technology..Marketing hone it to customer appeal.

          In other words,they have to work together..or the Company fails.

          Just like Brown and his lot can’t do!

        • 461
          The REAL Yoda says:

          Chuckie, Dear Boy…I what cowboy organisations you have ever worked for don’t know, apart from video game makers….but Engineering and Marketing in any decent organisation a joint goal have ..that is the most technically competent product to produce which customer appeal has. Engineering the technology sort out .. Marketing to customer appeal hone it .

          In other words,they have together to work ..or the Company fails.

          Just like Brown and his lot do can’t!

    • 417
      Cjamesk says:


      Did you forget to shred something?

  6. 7
    Master Baiter says:

    David Cameron is the got kicked in chief.

    • 51

      What the fuck are you on about now, you incoherent little wanker?

      The Penguin

      • 60
        no longer anonymous says:

        His last name says it all, his purpose here is to bait us, which inevitably means talking bollocks.

      • 238
        Frank says:


      • 320
        Wank my titties says:

        (A guide to incoherent wankers)

        “”Shoot the fucking lot, or better still, hang them as with pirates in years past when Britannia really did rule the fucking waves.

        The Penguin “”

        I bet this Hunt dreams of being jeremy clarkson, luckily he needs to post a link to his twattish rambling blog.

        • 323
          Wank my titties says:

          hoon obviously is a autocorrect for c.unt, which is obviously far more appropriate than hoon in this instance.

      • 420

        Master Baiter: rearrange these words into a simple sentence:

        I, Am, A, Fucking, Hoon

        • 584
          Baster Maitre says:

          I am fucking a HOON?

        • 715
          thick as thieves says:

          I like this game!
          ok, re-arrange the following words to make a sentence -
          david cameron is a thieving c’unt.
          not to david cameron: pay back the £102,874 that you have falsely claimed from the taxpayer you dishonest bastard.
          if you refuse to return the money you have stolen from the public purse, then so be it.
          but I will have my pound of flesh you thieving fucking c’unt.

        • 928
          Perversity Outreach Officer says:

          will your arse take a full pound, TwAT?

        • 938
          thick as thieves says:

          you are the big fat sweaty man-hating lesbian Scorched Earth and I claim my £5.

    • 85
      Anne Robinson says:

      MDepps? Is that you?

    • 88
      I am Sick says:

      Hey MB, ZanuLab are going to come in fourth tomorrow, good eh?

      • 231
        Bob A Job says:

        No they’ll be 5th

        • 269
          You've 'ad yer chance now get the f*ck out! says:

          This is fucking great telly – can’t get any work done watching the disintegration of Socialism.

          Bring it on :)

        • 275
          Aristotle says:

          in Wales and Scotland , maybe even 6th ….

        • 525
          Mr Ned says:

          Labour 5th? Shame, they should be 10th and last and then killed and then their remains sliced and diced into tiny pieces, then ground up into a paste and then burned, the ashes placed into concentrated acid and the resulting gunk put in a rocket and fired into the sun. Even then they would not be dead enough for me!

          I did want them hung on lamp-posts, but I would not want to contaminate good rope!

      • 345
        The Brown Stuff says:

        Brown to be forced out this evening 80 MPs to stand against him.take it to William Hill
        If you strike me down I will become stronger than you can imagine

        Obi One (eyed) Brown

      • 795
        Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

        Not even I think Zanulab can beat Conservative.

    • 419
      Sungei Patani says:

      No doubt you went to (are at) a bog standard comprehensive. Only reason I can think of for such an illiterate posting.

      • 450
        Master Baiter says:

        Oooo ‘ark at her, lardee darr

      • 725
        thick as thieves says:

        this is just a blog.
        and you are just a wanker.
        er, I think that covers the whole spelling and grammar jihadist thing.
        oh, and if somebody has had a bad education provided by a useless government then that is not their fault.

        • 808
          Old fart says:

          Well we’re really down the pan, then, if everyone educated since 1970 has a ready-made excuse for being illiterate. That said, it is only a blog, and people here only sneer at the grammar if they disagree with the comment.

        • 863
          thick as thieves says:

          yes we are you fucking imbecile.

        • 934
          Perversity Outreach Officer says:

          Thick as Thieves: hard on a blog, soft when your fist crashes into his skull

        • 945
          thick as thieves says:

          excellent, my very own stalker!
          shame she’s an ugly old butch lesbian though.
          note to tory HQ: you are having a fucking laugh by sending sweaty fat lesbian trolls.
          you c’unts really are scraping the bottom of the fucking barrell.

      • 892
        Harri says:

        Education , education education …

        Oh really you piss taking lefty fuckwits.

        I used to be dsylexic and according to you i am now cured ! i dont think so ?

        “Olde Mc Dornald hard are fram … e i o ee i owe uuu eee yuuu”

        Lying bastards

        I should have taken the fucking hint , when the lefty halfwit teacher gave me my first book to read ” Dickslexxiaah fur Begonias ”

        Groodnigght !

        • 1019
          Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

          I remember you Harri. You were at that Toga Party dressed as a Goat.

    • 1041
      going down the pan says:


  7. 7
    Stronghold Barricades says:

    48 hours to get in all the ammunition and stores for a long siege?

    Just block off Drowning Street, isolate it and let the rest of the country get on with the new agenda

    • 214
      Indigo says:

      People will write PhDs about this time – when it came to pass that all the £100m/year bribes for “loyalty” and all the bullying to ensure “loyalty” was not enough to hold together a British government.

    • 735


      • 1038
        Gordon Brown says:

        OHHHH fcukohfcukohfcukohfcukohfcukohfcuk OHHHH fcukohfcukfcukfcukfcukfcukfcukfcukfcukfcuk ohfcukohfcuk fcuk

        Och crivens, I’ve soiled meself agin……….ahhhhboohoohooohoooohooooooo

  8. 9
    Boris says:














    • 40
      MI5 says:


      There must be a public enquiry after the General Election

      The terms of reference for this clear misuse of public funds should include the following names :

      “Prime Minister” Brown

      “”Smearer in chief” McBride

      Tom Watson, Minister for Smearing

      Nick Brown Thug Chief Whip expenses fraud and “Shit kicker in chief”

      Little Alexander, smearing accomplice

      And their accomplices in the Press to this criminal defamation of political opponents and criminal deceit of the British people…..

      Starting with Andy “the smearing hack” Colson (who will soon be out of a job anyway…

      This investigation will bring to light the most sordid and digraceful abuse of political power and public finance in Britain’s history…

      “Gordon the compulsive liar” Brown and his Dirty Tricks team have DISGRACED DOWNING STREET AND THE BRITISH PEOPLE ALREADY..

      And will lead to Court action..


      • 293
        Jennifer Convention says:

        Can we have a war crimes trial at The Hague too please?

        • 509
          AnonyMousse says:

          Can’t we have them at my house. I want to be close to the action and make sure the little bastards get their just desserts? I’ll put a big screen up in the garden for visitors – bring a bottle….

      • 577
        Cheshire Cat says:

        I thought Nick Brown was Shit Stabber in Chief?

    • 44
      St George Spits says:


      It’s Labour, it’s what they do best.

      • 62
        Lloyd George of Hain says:

        Can I claim royalties from Broon?

      • 75
        Boris says:


        But this time Brown and his Thugs are clearly acting criminally and are looking fighteningly HITLERIAN…

      • 138
        David Chappell says:

        WTF do you expect, he’s a politician.

        Personally, I’m glad to be watching this from 8000 miles away.

      • 628
        Over by Christmas says:

        No, it’s a Presbeterian compass-you too can have one

  9. 10

    Its getting like Star Wars. All those generals visiting the dark lord Vader, then suddenly finding there’s a shortage of oxygen.
    if only Billy Hague had not stayed his sword.

    “You can’t win Peter. If you strike me down you shall become more powerful than I could ever imagine”
    and he did.

  10. 11
    nell says:

    Oh Guido please don’t call Browns team ‘Brownies.’

    Brownies are dear little girls who meet once a week to give allegiance to the Queen, say a prayer, play games and learn useful things.

    There is nothing dear, little (think TomW) or girlish (at least not attractively girlish) about these thugs.

    • 37
      ELECTION NOW !! says:

      Or loyal to the Queen…

    • 90
      Dr Nuts says:

      I thought Brownies were a food-stuff, very nice too.

      Whatever happened to the girl-guides? Aren’t brownies small girls in mini-skirts trying to be sweet?

    • 235
      Elby The Beserk, loving the current proceedings enormously, voting UKIP tomorrow, and 'avin a larf says:

      No. “Motions” is the correct turn for followers of Brown.

    • 243
      Henry Crun says:

      The terms “Shits” would be more appropriate.

      • 537
        Lonesome Dave says:

        …or Brown haters?

      • 554
        Mr Ned says:

        Short for shower of shits? good and apt description.

        I prefer the term necrotic pustular basket of cowards, cheats, thieves, swindlers, con-artists, fuckwits lying bastards, child abusers and war criminals.

        Shower of shits, as a phrase, rolls off the tongue easier though.

      • 633
        Gilles de la Tourette says:

        As some people with Tourette’s Syndrome have Coprolalia perhaps Brown is the first leader of a Coprocracy?

  11. 13
    Siberian Tory says:

    Darling needs to grow some Balls before we end up with Balls.

    Darling’s front bench career is over anyway. If he does what needs to be done he can go down in history as the chancellor who stopped the 2nd fiscial stimulus and brought down a delusional PM.

    At least he’d get dragged on to the D.P. to give economic comment with Ken Clark.

    • 94
      Dr Nuts says:

      Difference is Balls will continue what Brown’s policy – and attack people’s pensions.

      Balls will plunder pensions and savings arguing it’s good for the economy!

    • 515
      AnonyMousse says:

      *******breaking news******

      Darling has challenged Ball to a live tv wrestlemania type fight tonight on BBC4

      Winner is Chancellor until the general election

  12. 14
    Frank says:

    At least it keeps Brown in for a while longer. Who knows what will happen to the balance of power if the socialists vote in someone like Frank Field

  13. 15
    Davey Jones says:

    Blears is being publicly praised by Downing St.
    Will this deter her putting the knife in? Who can bring Gordo down?
    Darling could do it maybe, but only Straw has the ego to see himself as Kingmaker

    • 34
      Brown and Brother Cleanco says:

      Blears has been taken BY the cleaners.

      • 518
        AnonyMousse says:


        She has been wrapped up in a curtain, thrown in the back of a van and delivered to the people of Salford, with whom she wants to get re-aquianted

        • 539
          Dr Nuts says:

          Is she going to be doing that on street corners after the GE?

          Got to pay for her acorns somehow!

  14. 16
    bergen says:

    They really do hate each other.I’m wondering how long the vendettas will be played out in opposition if they’re like this in power.Could be a decade.Hope so.

    • 78
      Boris says:

      Labour are detroying themselves FOREVER


    • 1054
      Master Baiter says:

      Vendettas? The naff chocolate & ice-cream dessert?

      I quite like them

    • 1069
      Steve Expat says:

      I’m thinking the LibDems are looking more and more like the next Official Opposition…

  15. 17
    Master Baiter says:

    Cameron has lost the agenda.

    Osborne has lost his marbles.

    • 19
      Siberian Tory says:

      Hmmm lost his marbles. What’s it like living is a glass house Baiter?

    • 25
      Canary Wharf Rat says:

      And Brown is losing half his cabinet. Pretty careless I’d say

      • 106
        Dr Nuts says:

        Oh well, all he has to do is look under a slimey rock to find plenty more potential cabinet ministers.

        Some 40 back-benchers cite they’re unhappy – there’s a list for promotions as a sweetner!

      • 667
        Decimation Thursday says:


    • 26
      Seaman O'Philic says:

      Meisterwank ain’t lost his virginity

    • 32

      Only 48 hours and then you can take off your party armband,tear up your membership card and burn the red flag. You can join the crowds of people fleeing west telling your captors that you had no idea there were really 5 million on benefits and unemployed.
      “I was just a footsoldier. I hated Brown. I was only obeying orders.. I have never heard of quantitative easing….”

    • 33
      Dr Wolf says:

      And you are still waiting to loose your virginity.

    • 47
      Mrs George Osborne says:

      George is fully upholstered. Thank you.

    • 102
      I am Sick says:

      Labour fourth tomorrow, happy days.

    • 217
      Dodgyastheycome says:

      Lost property first right

    • 266
      moral compass says:

      Which lost agenda’s that then.
      1) Massive Govt expenditure will lead to national bankruptcy? no thats still there.
      2) Buggered up education policy leads to millions of working class kids failing to get properly educated, no thats still there.
      3) Labour desire to suck up to hampstead liberals and pass HR Act leading directly to non-deportation of terrorist, leading to kidnap and death of British citizen. No thats still there. Should I go on?

    • 743
      Harri says:

      And Mc Mental has just… lost it ?

  16. 20
    Master Baiter says:

    Blairites don’t talk to Guidorcs Oaf.
    Conservitudes don’t talk to Guidorcs Oaf.
    Guidorcs Oaf doesn’t know anything about anything.
    Look over there, duck!

  17. 21
    Anonymous says:

    Ooh. Can I get the popcorn?

  18. 22
    Vimeiro says:

    This soap opera is better than ‘The West Wing’

  19. 23

    Friday should be fun.

    • 422
      Dick Emery (in Character) says:

      Yes Im off to get my hair done.

    • 800
      Mr Ned says:

      I have booked the day off work and arranged a party for the Evening :D

      This will be a nice warm up act for the general election.

      I will be getting sky +HD to record that one, just to watch the retarded, in-bred, fuckwit labour faithful crying into their beers as the slaughter of their traitorous party yields a potentially bright future.

      I’ll have NONE of that fake “things can only get better” bollocks that labour deceived the nation with in 1997 either.

      Slaughtering the labour party will be a good start, but the next lot will have to make massive significant changes very very quickly before we start celebrating about things getting better. One thing IS certain. Things will not get any better under a party that has collapsed twice in four years.

  20. 24
    Master Baiter says:

    Sumbarine Toolie,
    Please tell what is the Conservitude logo meant to evoke.
    Ask a dog.

    • 35
      Canary Wharf Rat says:

      Every dog has it’s day and the Conservative Bulldog is about to shit all over your lot big time, cock it’s leg and piss on your parade. Time to eat shit and die.

    • 182
      Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

      I thought it was ‘Eat your greens’. I don’t know why the torys can’t use a euro flag, really?

  21. 27
    Scott says:

    These people disgust me, they really do. To a man they are unfit for the offices they hold.

  22. 28
    Mandelson Blair-Balls says:

    A lesson from the Mandelson school of politics :

    Fool Broon once, shame on Mandelson

    Fool Broon twice, bye bye Prime Minister.

    • 193
      Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

      Brown: ‘I want to stay in my job to fight hard working people and fairness’.

      • 239
        Adolf Hitler says:

        I am getting on with the job.

        • 351
          Right Bastard says:

          I’ve got the job in hand.

        • 521
          GordonBrownBalls says:

          No, I’m getting on with the job, two jobs actually, fixing the economy and fixing the expenses – all at cost to the electorate.

        • 544
          Dr Nuts says:

          Four jobs
          Fixing the economy
          Fixing the expenses
          Fixing the squirrel
          Fixing the ballots

  23. 29

    All aboard those deck chairs for the Titanic!

  24. 30

    Fucking ferrets in a fucking sack.

    Meanwhile, who’s running the country?

    • 46
      Hugh Janus says:

      I think you’ve got it wrong CF – the longer they are fighting each other the less they can do to foul up the country any further. You are making the silly assumption that ‘running the country’ by this lot is a good thing, when the very opposite is the truth.

    • 72
      Lloyd George of Hain says:

      That’s where a most useful.

    • 219
      Indigo says:

      Civil servants are running the country – if they can remember how, after all these long years of politicisation and interference.

      However, I share your concern.

      • 842
        Mr Ned says:

        That is one of the single most disgusting things that labour did from 1997. We used to have an impartial civil service. Labour turned the civil service, the police, education, the military, and mental health and the intelligence and security services into party political tools of the labour party to the extent that Labour were allowed to commit war crimes.

        Labour are a cancerous tumor in the rotting heart of our constitution and they must go.

        I am sick of their hatred of this country and the honest and decent hard working people who are increasingly butt-fucked by this shambolic excuse of a government.

        If there are any labour supporters can you answer this, If it was the tories that collapsed twice (in office) into attacking the leader and trying to inflict another unelected dictator on this country without an election, could you think of any way in which one could persuade people that they should still be re-elected?

        Why the fuck should we support a completely dysfunctional bunch of fuckwits that are incapable of even keeping their own party from collapsing for more than two years?

        Not only have they betrayed the people of this nation by wilfully breaking their own election pledges about raising income tax, by disgustingly attempting to DOUBLE the income tax of the poorest workers in the land so that they could attempt to bribe the middle-classes and by shitting on all democratic principles in a style that Mugabe would be proud of by refusing a promised referendum, but also they have collapsed in office TWICE!!!

        They are a sick and twisted joke. Incompetent, inept, unprofessional, completely dysfunctional and incapable of even pretending to look like anything remotely resembling a functioning government.


        I do not expect to get a rational answer though. Debating with the sort of person who STILL supports this collapsed labour party is like debating with inmates at a lunatic asylum. expect lots of circular, irrational, illogical, self contradicting arguments, heavily interspersed with vast quantities of lies and delusions and false memories.

        • 1062
          St George Spits says:

          Good one.

          Labour has 90% of the media spinning for them, that helps a lot.

          I hope & pray they’re defeated so soundly that the party ceases to exist in its present form and perhaps a principled replacement will eventually arise from the ashes.

          The damage they’ve done to the UK is likely irrepairable and that’s not counting the usual predictable Labour economic disasters.

          I’d like to see some of them in the dock too, start with Udders.

    • 359
      Oil Be Dammed says:


    • 524
      GordonBrownBallsCooper says:

      er, yes,erm…..?

  25. 31
    Master Baiter says:

    Conservitudes, couldn’t spin a washing machine.
    Just like their loser ‘war hero’ John McCain, of ‘I don’t know how many houses I own’ fame.
    By the way is George Osborne David Cameron’s Sarah Palin?
    What’s his clothes and makeup allowance?
    How many flies did he catch at PMQs?

    • 39
      Canary Wharf Rat says:

      Goodness me, all those words, all those posts and not one on policy.

    • 64
      Anonymous says:

      Oh god! are you back – I thought you had died

      MB – not a single poster on this blog is interested in your half-baked opinions and musings. Go away, you lower the tone and quite frankly – if you were sat next to me I would punch some sense into you..

    • 114
      I am Sick says:

      Labour fourth tomorrow.


      • 219
        Anonymous says:

        Was that what they meant by Go Forth?

        • 261
          Postal Vote says:

          Prezza going for 4 broken loo seats. He’s scouting for 2 more female office juinors or political wannabes for an exchange of body fluids, whichever they may fancy, in the unrestroom.

      • 225
        Boris says:





    • 149
      Dr Nuts says:

      “Conservitudes, couldn’t spin a washing machine.”

      High praise indeed from MB. After all – I for one have had enough of the Labour Spin machine, with its Machiavellian headline operations, Good Days to Bury Bad News, lies, deciet, more lies, headline politics of non-policies, vacuous statements intended for airheads, hypocrisy … the list goes on.

      DC cuts it as honest in your book – that’s refreshing to read!

      • 248
        my name's dave cameron, I'm a benefit cheat addicted to making false claims for free cash! says:

        Now you are being as silly as the fifth columnist, masterbates.
        Dave’s a thief.
        Unfit for the job he desires.
        Shame really.

      • 264
        Postal Vote says:

        Rather have a washing machine that spins than spinning the washing machine. I’m probably strong enough to spin the washing machine 1400 times, but I’m not sure whether the wiring and plumbing are up to scratch for that.

        • 330
          What on earth is that silly tory going on about? says:

          Now you are just talking gibberish.

      • 364
        Wank my titties says:

        There’s very little essential difference, a change in policy and revitalised electorate would be a good thing, but don’t overlook how DC got in to the top echelons of the tory party, don’t overlook the fact that he has yet to achieve a single thing in his life that demonstrates he is not merely a benefactor of circumstance.

        I personally don’t like the idea of a modern nation being run by etonian old-boys. Nothing to do with class, I just prefer the idea that we should be encouraging people who have succeeded without the backing of trust funds, daddy, or daddy’s friends.

        DC looks like a pathetic mewling bitch compared to Obama, for one.

        • 661
          Anonymous says:

          You mean like positive discrimination? Very PC

        • 855
          Mr Ned says:

          And he still looks like a messianic leader compared to Brown. Seriously, Brown is not fit to clean Cameron’s feet, and I hate Cameron as he is just another Rothschild puppet.

          So is Brown, but he is a seriously deranged, incompetent, cowardly, lying sack of shit Rothschild puppet.

          Cameron is ten times the leader that Brown is.

          Come on you pathetic mewling labour trolls. Is that the best you can do?

          We must vote for Brown to prevent Cameron getting in?

          That is like saying we should infect ourselves with cancer, herpes, syphilis and AIDS to stop ourselves from catching a cold!

          Step it up a notch will you, this is getting way too easy you pathetic amateur trollsters. Why should we vote for a Government that is so weak, divided, incompetent, cowardly and dysfunctional that they have collapsed twice in the last 3 years???

        • 1063
          St George Spits says:

          What has Obama done that actually produced anything ?
          He’s just like Jacqui Smith, Balls & the rest of them. Political hanger-on since college, never contributed or produced anything useful in his life – well he has quadrupled the national debt since January 20 but that’s not anything to boast about.
          Would you like him as PM ? He might even qualify as a Commonwealth citizen !

        • 1132
          Susie says:

          Two words: Shaun Bailey. Tory candidate for Hammersmith & Shepherds Bush


          And no, I don’t admire him just because he’s black, like a Labour honky would.

    • 156
      resurgemus says:

      Clothes and make-up ?

      You just couldn’t leave Phil Woolas alone could you ?

    • 274
      moral compass says:

      well he did fight in a war against communists and got tortured. Um. Your point is?. Obviously he should have gone to university at 15, become a marxist and spent the rest of career being a vicious sociopath shafting all his comrades in a desperate bid to get ahead?. Thats the sort of heroism that probably turns you on.

    • 949
      nearlyheadlessnicky says:

      Sarah Palin is serious MILF crumpet … Drooooool!

  26. 36
    Jonathan Cook says:

    It doesn’t take much to have to hate Labour does it?

    So now the Blairites are holding a gun to Gordon’s head – so after 10pm they will start dishing the dirt back and aim to blow Brown’s reshuffle off course.

    Why do Labour insist on fighting each other by anonymous briefings?!!! Take a leaf out of the Tories book for once. Challenge each other in the open and have a fair fight in the playground.

    Oh – and none of the usual Labour ballot rigging from either side please.

  27. 38
    Ed Balls MP and Yvette-Cooper-Mrs-Balls MP says:

    At an imminent historic moment in British and World history, we are grateful to Guido for his support and understanding.

    £5 ( NOT expensed) in the post.

    • 142
      Labour MP Frank Crook says:

      That’s MY five pounds !! Give it back !!

      • 531
        Ed Balls MP says:

        Will do, tomorrow, when I am Chancellor of the Exchequer, and I will introduce
        a 100% gift tax. So, you owe me a fiver.

    • 1056
      Memory Loss says:

      How come everyone forgot about your house shenanigans?

  28. 41
    Dr Feelgood says:

    Barry Sheerman, Lab, Huddersfield on BBC News now complaining about collapse in entire PLP. Snubbing of MPs by Brown and whips; MPs alienated and disillusioned; resent command and control leadership style; lack of involvement and ability to influence; risks losing base of support.

    Brown needs to act fast to avoid unstoppable collapse in support.

    • 86
      Anonymous says:

      He is doing. That is what this bit of ‘Rat Fucking’ is about.
      Unfortunately for Our Glorious (and Courageous) Leader, he has his enforcers rushing round knifing people in the back when he should be out there ‘winning friends and influencing people’.
      That is why McDoom will be gone by the end of next week – he misjudges everything.

    • 87
      Boris says:




      • 242
        Australian says:

        Where the hell’s Sir John Kerr when you need him? He sure knew how to get rid of a crackpot, spendthrift Labour Government in the name of Her Majesty and for the good of the country!

        • 560
          Benny says:

          Quite agree

          There is a definite lack of cojones here in Britain ?

          What do you call them in OZ ??!!

        • 570
          Australian says:

          “Balls”, mate. But that’s what you call wannabe Chancellors, I gather!

      • 428

        The 6th of June (D-Day) is when we remember the beginning of the fight back against forced European Integration plans.

        • 630
          Anonymous says:

          There is no better time for young Dave to ask the European question. All those UKIP would vote Tory. EU need to keep us on side to buy all those German and French cars (UK second biggest market outside France for their cars.)

          At uni’ all the politics and IR bang on about being better in than out (of the EU.) But for to a man they can’t tell me why. I hate being called a little Englander. If I remember my history we were once the hub of an empire that circumvented the globe. In a world of massive container ships and the internet why do we have to fall into line because of geography when we didn’t have to in the 18th, 19th and the 20th centuries?

          The make me laugh when they say the EU has made us more secure.

          I have opted to study the EU next year. I am looking forward to kicking lecturer butt. Bunch of lefty arse ‘oles……

        • 966
          Dredrick Tatum says:

          Good for you. Then, when you graduate, apply for a work Visa in Oz and get the hell out of this sh1thole.

  29. 42
    Fausty says:

    Meanwhile, Labour backbenchers are circulating a “round robin” letter calling for Brown to stand down. Once they receive 80 signatures, which could happen today, they’ll deliver it to Brown. They might hold off until the results of all elections are out, on Monday.

  30. 49
    Praguetory says:

    Good stuff, Guido. I like the fact that you are increasing the risks of copy-taking. If we had a clearout of lazy/inadequate journos we wouldn’t have many left. Oh well.

  31. 50
    Red Rhondda says:

    If it’s capital gains tax on selling flipped property, what about the Deputy Leader of the Commons, Chris Bryant? He seems to be squirming in the Welsh press today.

    • 283
      moral compass says:

      i wish he eas squirming a press, a wine press. Not sure what sort of wine he’d produce though . A rather cheap Rose i suspect.

    • 464
      Trough Mixture says:

      Origami underpants eh? Dirty little devil! What that boy needs……

  32. 53
    MI5 says:







    • 260


      • 292
        moral compass says:

        calm down mandy. it will all be alright. really at will. you will foreign secretary. and you wont make pigs ear of it. like your grandfather.

        • 311
          David Cameron is a benefit thief. and you are criminally minded as well! says:

          Your moral compass is not working, must be rusty.
          Dave is a thief and you want to ignore the fact.
          Bloody hell, you Tories are just as bad as New Labour.
          Tony Blair and David Cameron are two cheeks of the same backside.
          The last thing this country needs is another Tony Blair running the show.
          Dave would probably invade Iran.

      • 442
        Cjamesk says:

        Just look at Labours front bench if you want millionaires.

        Socialists are worst than a cornered rat.

      • 490
        Labour thieves, liars and hypocrites says:

        That multimillionaire Woodward sat next to the millionaire Brown alongside the niece of the Countess of Longford Harriet Harmperson, meanwhile back in the studio multimillionaire G. Hoon answered on behalf of the socialist party. Hilarious parody.

      • 541
        BoMI5 says:

        I REPEAT




        AND I CAN GO ON


        • 654
          Querty says:



          No need to shout ol’boy we all agree.

    • 468
      Trough Mixture says:

      …and the accuracy of a sniper I would suggest.

  33. 54
    Johnny says says:

    “Watson is still unofficially doing his old enforcer job, even the semi-detached Douglas Alexander is back on the bunker team.”

    Is McSnide still hanging around like a bad smell too?

    Why do no Blairites come forward with these bits of information publically? Because they are shits. It is not in the interest of the Labour Party or the Nation to allow underhand, backroom, shadowy dealings to continue but as ever, most politicians put themselves above all else.

  34. 55
    Canary Wharf Rat says:

    Keep your friends close, your enemies closer. Harriot was practically on his lap during PMQ’s
    Mark my words, no election for a year
    Harriot + majority of wimmin to make up the cabinet to ringfence the wimmin vote (15% bounce)
    Hung and unhung parliament.

    • 61
      Reg Buttox says:

      which women did you have in mind ?

    • 137
      I am Sick says:

      Oh please, please, please, let it be Harmperson, current minister for discrimination and sexism. Oh dear Lord I am not a religious man, but please anoint Ms Harmperson of Wimmin to be Gordon McSnots successor. The wimmin will vote for her, the women and men will not. ZanuLab are finished, over, dead.

    • 257
      Henry Crun says:

      And Woodward was practically performing fellatio on Gordon.

      • 471
        Trough Mixture says:

        He was interviewed before PMQs. He appears to have significant mould growth upon his scalp.

      • 558
        Benny says:

        Woodward has probably promised Dirty Tricks a job when the whole Great New Labour Project finally explodes…

      • 578
        BunkerBalls says:

        watch out for a promotion for woodward…if the government lasts any longer

        • 637
          Anonymous Misogynist says:

          Woodward would appear to be his new confident. Sitting down from answering Cameron’s last question Brown said, “that didn’t go down too well, did it”?

        • 652
          NewGirl says:

          yes they’re v cosy aren’t they? mind you he hasn’t many friends left…

    • 259
      Henry Crun says:

      Mandelson must be hoping for a well hung parliament.

  35. 56
    Harpoon at the ready Sah! says:

    Yesterday I thought Gordon Brown was going down with the Titanic.

    This morning though, Brown dressed himself as a woman, climbed into a lifeboat, threw the real women overboard, and is now paddling away as fast as he can shouting “I am Captain of this boat”.

    The sly Hoon.

    • 69
      Captain Smith - Ice, what ice, oh fuck did that come from America says:

      It cannot be coincidence that Brown shares with me one of the most common of surnames

    • 116
      Robert Ballard says:

      Same shit, different boat.

      • 265
        Captain Smith - Ice, what ice, oh fuck did that come from America says:

        You wouldn’t want to dive on his wreck tho’

  36. 57


  37. 59
    I smell a pup..... says:

    Dizzy has an interesting take on this too


    • 73
      Siberian Tory says:

      If Blears is going to strike home she’d better do it very soon. I’d being giving Newsnight a call.

    • 82
      Spank Sinatra says:

      Fascinating – well spotted. Free roll of Andrex coming your way!

  38. 66
    nell says:

    The Guardian is reporting that the groing rebellion in the Labour Party has a timetable that will see Gordon removed from office by 9th June, potential new Leaders nominated on the 11th and a Leadership election on the 29th.

    Can this be true?

    If it is I am not happy because I don’t think Labour should get the chance to put another new leader in and regroup before it goes for a GE.

    I was hoping the SNP would win through with it’s dissolution motion next week and that we would then see Gordon take Labour into an election.

    • 89
      • 121
        13eastie says:

        9 June: The prime minister is forced from office.

        Not normally celebrated nowadays, but that date happens also to be my birthday.

        Look out for me at the pub, where I might well be dishing out Guinness to all comers (even Master Baiter if he brings his fake ID).

        • 302
          Augeas says:

          And my silver wedding anniversary, so I should not be joining you. Which pub, just in case we do not get through the week?

        • 354
          13eastie says:

          Lions are playing the next day. Elangeni hotel?

    • 112
      Stepney says:

      If they do have a timetable they’ll either

      a) fuck it up because they’re incompetent fuckwits
      b) fuck it up because they didn’t think it through
      c) outsource it to Accenture or Capita and let them fuck it up for £30,000 a day.

  39. 67
    dirtyden says:

    The LEFT is mobilising against BROWN!

    First time I’ve ever seen them serve a useful purpose.

  40. 68
    Master Baiter says:

    I like little boys.

  41. 70
    Lloyd George of Hain says:

    Andrew Porter?

    I may have met his great-granny.

  42. 71
    Horace says:

    Straw and Mandy are so quiet we can only imagine them to be sharpening their knives off-stage, ready to seize control of whatever government we have left.

  43. 73
    Master Baiter says:

    Conservitude ‘leader’ Cameron photo opping in front of a gaggle of Tim Nice-but-Dims, priceless. Each holding a placard, not exactly taking it to the streets, is it?

    • 80
      Siberian Tory says:

      Better than hiding in a bunker dribbling though?

      • 95
        dirtyden says:

        Don’t talk to the little boy. Let him wank himself to death.

        Run along now, baiter.

        • 230
          LadyGrecian says:

          Unlike the brave Broon, I suppose? He won’t go near the public, barring old ladies, that is. Oh, and he was spotted last week jiggling a poor baby up and down….maybe he thought some coins might drop out of its bottom.

          He knows that given the chance those on “the streets” would make their feelings known in no uncertain terms. It would make the booing and jeering Andy “Zsa Zsa Gabor” Burnham got from the Liverpool football fans look like loving acclaim.

    • 760
      Master Baiter says:

      I iz window lickin’ good, innit

  44. 76
    backwoodsman says:

    Ahh, The smell of fried chipmunk in the morning !
    Interestingly, friends saying they still have’t gone back to buying the Telegraph, after its nasty outbreak of disloyalty.

  45. 77
    • 92
      dirtyden says:

      Top notch stuff, dizz.

    • 139
      michel de montaigne says:

      Keep thinking Dizzy. Plebs like me still take too much at face value. I’m hopless at chess and poker

    • 318
      Well done Dizzy, you are clever and everyone else is stooopid(not) says:

      Gold star for dizzy. (Should stop the cry baby from bawling his eyes out… again!)

      • 658
        Anonymous Misogynist says:

        I commented about a month ago regarding the sudden change in the Torygraph’s pro Tory articles, saying that, ‘one swallow does not a summer make’.
        I didn’t trust them then, even less now.

  46. 81
    Cynthia Clapp says:

    Hazel Chipmunk has sharp claws and a brass neck.

    Hope Broon has tons of toilet paper stocked up.

  47. 84
    Master Baiter's Mum says:

    I beg you to please leave my son alone, I know he’s a naughty boy for fouling this site with his nonsense but don’t be cruel, being a member of McStalins League of Guilded Youth is about as low as it goes and since his dad was convicted of fondling him recently he’s got worse.

  48. 91
    Master Baiter says:

    Just think the Labour NEC can bar Blears from standing again.

    Isn’t power interesting?

  49. 93
    rocking horse preservation society says:

    … shit-kicker in chief ….

    shit LICKER, more like.

  50. 96
    DisgustedOfMitcham2 says:

    It’s clear that Labour needs a new leader with more charisma and leadership than Brown can offer. Does anyone know if Michael Foot is still alive?

    • 98
      Boris says:

      No no

      But the Blubbering Hattersely is available to re-invent Old Labour style bankruptcy for you !

    • 103
      Anonymous says:

      Dont know but Kinnock is-just!

    • 126
      Double take says:

      Michael Foot is ninety six and still alive.


    • 164
      Lofa on the Sofa says:

      Some would argue that he wasn’t really alive when he was leading the Labour party! That said, he did have more charisma, leadership skills and political nouse than Broon, at least they came second under him!

    • 557
      nell says:

      Maybe not ‘more’ charisma and leadership just ‘some’

      May I suggest Denis Healey – though not sure he is stilll alive, but then again that won’t matter it would still be an improvement on the present incumbent.

      Mr Healey’s eyebrows would provide an interesting foil to Darling’s badger looks.

      • 694
        Ghost of Herbert Morrison says:

        The obvious solution is to have a caretaker prime-minister who doesn’t have to worry about being deselected or re-elected.

        Genes will out…

        • 865
          Baldprick says:

          Do you have someone in mind My Lord?

        • 1133
          Susie says:

          Shame George Brown drank himself to death, both the surnames and the crazeee economics wouldn’t be much of a shock for tender Labour sensibilities (not sure about the juxtaposition of the last 2 words — doesn’t seem right at all somehow).

          Labour are only happy when unemployment is rocketing over the 2 million mark, the UK is the laughing stock of the rest of the world, and having to beg a bailout from the IMF. Anything approaching normality and sanity is out of their comfort zone.

  51. 99
    Siberian Tory says:


    The biographer of Brown (coming to a bargin bin near you) just said

    “The problem with Gordon Brown is that he’s got so many problems he can’t deal with them”

    He also described him as a bully who has nothing left to offer and bribe people with.

  52. 101
    Anonymous says:

    Here’s a thought – Hazel Blears has repayed the unpaid Capital Gains Tax that she didn’t pay on the sale of her “second home”; and David Cameron has demanded all Tory MP’s who did the same must repay the Capital Gains Tax.

    Why then has Eric Joyce, Labour MP for Falkirk, not offered, or been asked, to repay the Capital Gains Tax that he ADMITTED was unpaid on the sale of his “second home”?

    Why has he slipped through the net/under the radar? Someone investigate please.

  53. 105
    Anonymous says:

    “This is Downing Street back up to its old tricks, getting dirt on enemies, putting the dirt into the public domain via friendly Lobby hacks.”

    These are very old Downing Street tricks remember John Biffen and the sewer aka Bernard Ingham

  54. 107
    You Know Who. says:


    What is happening now is about as unedifying as it gets, worse even than the death of Stephen Milligan.

    For the sake of the country someone has to put a stop to this. It seems you may be the only person able to do it.

  55. 108
    The Inquisition says:

    Financial misconduct = Conservatives

    • 135
      Anonymous says:

      Electoral annihilation = Labour

    • 192
      Anonymous says:

      Fuck off Ambrose.

    • 253
      Elby The Beserk, loving the current proceedings enormously, voting UKIP tomorrow, and 'avin a larf says:

      Oh God. There was me thinking you had been put to death at the stake.

      • 405
        Anonymous says:

        Don’t remember to tell Lilith to clean behind the fridge – could I suggest you do it before voting for the BNP in suits.

    • 306
      Anonymous says:

      Financial misconduct = All of them bar Dennis Skinner.

  56. 109
    VotR says:

    We could always grab some pitchforks and revolutionise Downing Street, with extra knitting.

    • 566
      nell says:

      I hear Sarkozy would be happy to lend us a guillotine. I’m sure we wouldn’t be short of people hapy to bring their knitting and stools.

      • 608
        Cheshire Cat says:

        Huh – the French are a bunch of Johnny-come-latelys when it comes to gravity based decapitation. We had one over here some 250 years before their amateurish attempts.

        Bring back the Halifax Gibbet, I say…

        • 678
          nell says:

          Well of course a British gibbet would be most appropriate !!!!!!!!!!

          Great History Cheshire Cat I never knew that . This is what I love about this site. Always something else to learn.

  57. 110
    Judas says:

    Anybody need thirty pieces of silver

    • 579
      nell says:

      Darling? Nope- he hasn’t got the backbone more’s the pity.

      I think Mandy is going to be the one to make the last cut – he’s playing a deep game and he’s more than capable of it.

      Ironically he doesn’t need thirty pieces of silver because he has this russian friend who’s richer than Croesus and who’s very grateful for the opportunity he has been given by Mandy to purchase Vauxhall along with all those jobs he can now transfer to russia.

  58. 113
    Julie Kirkbride says:

    Stephen Milligan always knew how to keep people in suspence.

    • 506
      Unsworth says:

      Well Julie, is that ‘pence’ or ‘pense’? You of all people should know the difference….

  59. 115
    Dr Feelgood says:

    On BBC News just now, Alan Johnson’s PPS quoted as denying that Johnson is involved in or supports any anti-Brown plot.

    This confirms there IS a plot.

    He who wields the knife, never wears the crown.

    Very clever Postman Pat

    • 141
      M.T.BUCKET says:

      He looked a bit jaded on P.M.Q. To many late nights probably.

      • 180
        Siberian Tory says:

        LL is reporting that the Guardian is reporting that few people are signing the letter because it’s being touted by a known trouble maker and people who are far too left wing.

        LL reckon Frank Field or John Cruddas.

  60. 117
    Interesting_Times says:

    You folk crack me up.
    I’ve never really been interested in politics until I started reading Guido, and now I can’t stop. I’d just like to thank you all for turning a political ignoramus (me) into some one who is starting to care about what my government are up to.


  61. 118
    Anonymous says:

    Vai plantar favas e mete um chouriço no cú!

  62. 119
    Jonathan Cook says:

    I’m not sure that it is correct to say the “Blairites” are against Brown.

    Mandelson has been spinning the same line as Liam Byrne:


    The vile black heart of the Labour government is still beating…….

    • 165
      I am Sick says:

      Ah, Mandy ” I`m a fighter, not a quitter” Fondlebum, giving Gordon “courage” Braun a lesson in character, who would have guessed?

    • 591
      nell says:

      I guess Mandy was the one giving Gordon a pep talk before PMQ’s “You must hold your nerve”

      Can just hear it – “Don’t lose your temper, keep smiling (try not to look too demented when you do that) and DO NOT throw the mace at anyone but especially at Cameron or Clegg – toys need to be kept in the pram”

      Interesting in PMQ’s that Clegg spoke so strongly against him holding onto to power when there has been all this Labour spin this week about a Lib Lab pact and Vince Cable becoming the next Chancellor.

      • 1134
        Susie says:

        Perhaps there’ll be one only after Brown goes… or perhaps the Liberals have grown a spine.

  63. 120
    Lloyd George of Hain says:

    In my day a woman’s place was in the house, and Caroline Flint totty would have been working for me in No 10.

    And she would have no reason to resign.

  64. 122
    Flashback from the Vomitorium says:

    All I believe and all I try to do comes from the values that I grew up with: duty, honesty, hard work, family and respect for others. And this is what my parents taught me and will never leave me: that each and everyone of us has a talent, each and everyone of us should have the chance to develop their talent, and that each of us should use whatever talents we have to enable people least able to help themselves. And so I say honestly: I am a conviction politician. My conviction that everyone deserves a fair chance in life. My conviction that each of us has a responsibility to each other. And my conviction that when the strong help the weak, it makes us all stronger.
    Call it the driving power of social conscience, call it ‘the better angels of our nature’, call it ‘our moral sense’, call it a belief in ‘civic duty’. I joined this party as a teenager because I believed in these values. They guide my work, they are my moral compass. This is who I am. And because these are the values of our party too the party I lead must have more than a set of policies – we must have a soul.

    • 132
      Sub Editor says:

      And then you said:

      This week marks a new start
      A chance to renew.
      And I say to the people of Britain:
      The new government I will lead belongs to you. I will work hard for you. I shall always try my utmost.
      I am ready to serve.

      You’ve had your chance you Jock numpty and you fucked it up.

      Now do us all a favour and fuck off back to Haggis Towers.

    • 213
      Anonymous says:

      Whilst I respect your views and beliefs, I’m afraid it really doesn’t matter how strong your convictions are. The damage has already been done and we need a fresh start.

      We just can’t believe a word you lot say any more.

    • 401
  65. 123
    righty right wing (mrs) says:

    Andy Porter is just another shill.

    Soon they will all publicly condemn him & retract & recant.

    The Fuhrer is down to his last bottle of amphetamines in the bunker & there is no-one willing to be seen publicly fetching more for him due to the advancing mob & of course death by association that always comes with these final days of all despots.

    The tsunami of shite heading towards the bunker is now unstoppable.

    Get some Shiraz in, sit back & enjoy – the next week is going to be absolutely delightful – payback for the last 12 years.

    Dissolve Parliament. Arrest the troughing MPs.

    Depose & deport McMental & his jock junta.

    • 270
      Australian says:

      Too right, Mrs RRW. I reckon now’s about time to dig out one of those old bottles of “Grange” from the cellar – been waiting a long time for a good enough reason to celebrate with that!

    • 598
      nell says:

      South African preferably

  66. 127
    Dogsbollocks says:

    Just read an interesting article in The Times ” Police crime map plots Scotlands 367 gangs” Leaves one question open Which one is Gordo in ??

  67. 129
    Anonymous says:

    Corrupt Labour

    This advert appeared in our local paper.

    John Prescott MP
    Former Deputy Prime Minister After Dinner Speaker. Book with JLA

    Come on guys lets have some fun sending this letcherous old soak to fictitious dinners.

  68. 130
    Flemingcrag says:

    If there is any holding back the dirt on expenses it just might be the Telegraph doing the holding.
    I mean what a grenade that would be, allow Gordon to fire the one or is it two Ministers who haven’t already resigned, get the photograph done of the new cabinet then pull the pin.
    I dream on…..

  69. 133
    Augeas says:

    Why does the Telegraph need a lickspittle stooge like Porter when they have Brogan? Surely the Barclays can tell which way the wind is blowing.

  70. 140
    Master Baiter says:

    I’ve got poo-poo on my pee-pee.

  71. 143
    • 258
      Elby The Beserk, loving the current proceedings enormously, voting UKIP tomorrow, and 'avin a larf says:

      Brief. And to the point. Thanks.

  72. 147
    Anonymous says:

    Problem is for Labour, Alan Johnson is not going to solve anything, total lightweight thats going to get torn up, he has only been in cabinet since 2004 and not held any of the big beast PM making departments. He has not run any of the big beast depts like Home, Foreign or treasury and has had 4 cabinet positions in 5 years.

    Hardly a good recommnedation for running the country.

    • 174
      Alan Johnson says:

      I’ll re-open all the Post Offices though

    • 175
      Anonymous Misogynist says:

      And tell me about Obama.

      • 199
        Anonymous says:

        point proven total lightweight is Obama, he’ll be dead in the water within a year.

        Besides Americans are stupid.

    • 757
      thick as thieves says:

      oh do keep up you fucking cripples.
      the more loyal readers will remember that thick as thieves predicted, against all odds, not only a victory for President Obama but also that he would win a large victory.
      I seem to remember that all you retards were rimming the arse off the ugly midget mccain.
      now I predict that Alan Johnson will be the Prime Minister of the country.
      within eight weeks.
      I don’t get shit like that wrong.
      that is why I am a genius and AM and anonospaz are not.

  73. 151
    It's just not British says:

    Can I just say Prime Minister that hanging on by your fingertips, well, it’s just not British is it?

    • 208
      michel de montaigne says:

      Just realised what causes those facial expressions. Sarah is painting his fingernails with that horrible tasting stuff. Better with boxing gloves

  74. 153
    Lloyd George of Hain says:

    Will Mandy be the last woman in the Broon cabinet?

  75. 154
    Horace says:

    Whatever will happen next, Guido?

    In Banana Republics, the failing dictator can only respond to unpopularity with still bigger lies, and more ugly repressive measures to shore up his tyranny.

    Will Brown go out with a bang, or a whimper? Or will his whole regime simply collapse into a decomposing mass sluiced away down the drain-pipe of history, when the septic tank cleaners at last come to pump out the Downing Street cess-pit?

    We live in interesting times!

  76. 158
    cato the uncensor says:

    Just seen Andrew Porter on yesterday’s Politics Today show (I know, I still work).

    He should be an MP instead of a journalist. He couldn’t answer a question straight – the hoon!

    • 613
      nell says:

      The DT should sack him and unless they do most of us won’t go back to buying it.

      Probably won’t anyway . The digital age has taken over. Bye Bye Telegraph.

  77. 160
    Master Baiter says:

    Dog to Nuts
    David Cameron is a constant liar, he’s just very very weak at it.
    You may go

    • 170
      resurgemus says:


      given Brown is about to get knifed ( not intellectually up to the job ) which side of Labour will you be backing the TBs or the GBs ?

    • 171
      Anonymous says:

      unfortunately you are just a dog that needs putting down.

    • 197
      michel de montaigne says:

      I’ll get you at playtime!

  78. 166
    jgm2 says:

    The more flaccid my idea, the more flaccid my comment, that’s why I’ll be voting New ConKip Ass ertive, like. They like me there.

  79. 176
    Hugh Janus says:

    I do wish BBC News would change their front page, so that we have Flinty walking into No10 (following her resignation) instead of having the watch the unedifying ginger minger’s arse disappearing through the doorway every 10 seconds. A bit tedious, to say the least. It’s enough to put a chap off politics.

  80. 177
    michel de montaigne says:

    God this is boring almost 6 hours without a resignation. This is not wot I came into bloging for

  81. 178
    John McCain says:

    Sarah Palin = George Osborne

    • 286
      Mrs George Osborne says:

      You can’t be serious.

      My George and Mrs Brown???

    • 290
      Postal Vote says:

      if you’re a labour hack, this might just backfire on you, and we may think you do not even know that africa exists

      palin has what americans call a ‘folksy’ style, quite the opposite of the style that beebistas and guardianistas comrades emphasize when spekaing of osborne, cameron or redwood

    • 480
      Trough Mixture says:

      Tom Watson = Ted Stevens

  82. 185
    Tartwatch says:

    Hilary Benn Labour Party Unity PM

  83. 186
    michel de montaigne says:

    Present day collective Cabinet thinking.

    ” Now how do I maximize my book sales”

  84. 188
    Bore is Johnson says:

    Re the wreath on egg thpenthes thorry.

  85. 189
    Jonathan Cook says:

    The Guardian’s “Gordon Brown Leadership Crisis – Live” is amusing – they’ve picked up on the Downing Street smear operation too…..


  86. 194
    Bishop Stubbs-Costin-Watson says:

    Folks you do all seem to be forgetting something. Is not this the hour at which Dave and the Conservatives should table a confidence vote? If Labour rallies together to fend off defeat, I don’t think they will be doing themselves much of a favour. And conceivably the government might fall. In which case we would get our early election.

    • 225
      Sir Reginald Titbrain says:

      Labour lobby fodder don’t want an election that would destroy them, they want a new leader who can give them hope that their inevitably large defeat will still leave the party intact.

      Generally they are desperate not suicidal, cowardly, not decisive.

      And a bunch of wankers.

      • 621
        nell says:

        A new Leader to give them hope !!!!- simple!!!!- they need bliar the evangelist who has found God.

        Why did they swap him for this delusional presbyterian?

        Hair shirts all round!!!!

    • 263
      JMT says:

      I think the SNP are tabling one for next Wednesday, I also think that the SNP tabled the one which ousted the last labour lot in 1979.

      Quite ironic really.

      Labour gives the Jocks a parliament to keep them quiet, and they bumfuck Labour in gratitude.

      1979 all over again.

      Plus ca change, plus la meme chose.

      • 424
        Dr Feelgood says:

        To get the full 1979 experience, we need a desperately ill Labour MP who will have to be dragged out of his deathbed to vote.

      • 745
        MI5 says:

        But the SNP are going to wipe out the Scottish Labour Mafia this time as well..

        Good for them

        I would then give them their independence…

        For services rendered to England…

  87. 196
    Sir Reginald Titbrain says:

    If the Government had any sense they would stuff the Telegraph by making the dodgy disc available to one and all and minimise the drip feed of bad publicity over a lengthy period, at the Telegraph’s pleasure. It will all come out in the end anyway.

    Or will it? I wouldn’t put it past these lowlifes to try and do a deal- go in too hard and you’ll loose your scoop; if we’re going to get shafted then we’ll decide the agenda. And I certainly wouldn’t put it past the DT to agree.

    • 244
      Indigo says:

      They can’t make the disk available to everyone – would be a breach of the data protection AND the EU/UK data privacy directive. Yes, I can imagine this Government breaching British data protection laws without a backward glance but they would hesitate to breach the EU equivalents: the litigation by wronged MPs and their families (some of whom are very wealthy and influential) would go on for years.

      There are now about 40m enraged voters ready to conduct their own investigation of material on the disk, were its contents to come into the public domain, and – in my view – if that happened someone would get killed. Or their entire property would be set alight by someone who had recently suffered repossession. I don’t need to spell it out – you get my drift.

      • 271
        Anonymous says:

        It is OK you can breach the Data protection Act anytime you like. Government agencies do it daily. The ICO is totally powerless and inept. It would be 5 months before you even get a letter from them. Then just respond with any untruth and they will close the file.

        The agencies have been encouraged to make as much money as they can from their assets. (your personal information). Giving out their data on the web would be minor to their intentional selling of information.

        You can do anything, if there is nobody that cares. The ICO is a joke.

      • 276
        Hugh Janus says:

        Besides, the DT has had a number of people working on the data for many weeks. Release of the disc now would require similar analysis by anyone intending to run a story on any of the MPs. They only have to get a detail wrong to face a libel action, so it would have to be a painstaking exercise – and perhaps McBust will have fallen on his light bulbs long before then.

    • 246
      Anonymous says:

      Everyone has their needs. Telegraph just wants circulation.

      Guy Fawkes (original) wanted to kill the King and destroy the country over religious differences.

      My needs are simple: I need to leave the UK before someone succeeds where GF failed.

  88. 200
    Anonymous says:

    It was inevitable that they would turn on each other; after tomorrow it will be an absolute free for all. When liars cheats and thieves plot they invariably bring about their own demise. But who on earth cleans the dog shit up for Blunkett? To see the odious pair, Balls and Cooper, hounded out of office and seat would be a truly wonderful gift to me as I lay in my hospital bed.

  89. 201

    Just heard a rumour that Caroline Flint is resigning as I write.

    • 205
      Anonymous says:

      No great loss there, then.

    • 235
      Two More To Go? says:


      Following Home Secretary Jacqui Smith’s resignation from the cabinet yesterday, Hazel Blears will also resign her position as Communities Secretary and it’s rumoured that two more ministers will step down by the end of the day, although not, as earlier rumoured, Europe Minister Caroline Flint.


  90. 202
    Master Baiter says:

    Boris Johnson claimed on expenses for a Remembrance Sunday wreath, yikes!

    How cheap can a highly paid Telegraph windbag columnist get?

    • 216
      Come off it Boris says:

      I’m disappointed with Boris. He has hardly put a foot wrong since being made Mayor, but this really stinks.

      Let’s hope he doesn’t get his fucking cheque book out and wave it around. Something more meaningful might be in order – a mea culpa and a big donation to charity perhaps?

      • 252
        Hugh Janus says:

        I agree, quite indefensible. Poor show Boris, we expected better of you.

      • 284
        Olaf says:

        It was a mistaken claim while an MP, not London Mayor. Even the BBC present the explanation in a rational and clear way, check the facts before guzzling bile from Masterbator!

      • 392
        Dr Feelgood says:

        The cost was billed directly to his office on account and was submitted by his office. As soon as it was rejected, he realized an error had been made and the claim was cancelled.

        End of story.

        NOT the same as writing out a handwritten note to reclaim a £5 church donation like Frank Cook (Lab.) at a Battle of Britain memorial service. That was a conscious act.

        • 430
          Master Baiter says:

          The cheapskate still made the claim though didn’t he?

          That yahoo has a terrible temper too, he’ll go gawumph and harumph every time someone mentions it.

        • 472
          Frank Cook MP says:

          It’s great that Boris made a similar mistake to me, takes the heat off completely, preparing constituency leaflets as I type. Cheers

        • 817
          Master Baiter says:

          I lick windows don’t cha know :)

        • 829
          Anonymous says:

          Given the number of wreaths he has to lay and supposedly buy I guess you would buy them all yourself huh baiter.

          Oh do fuck off.

          Any wreath is laid on behalf of the peiple you reprecsent so we purchase it. If he was laying his own wreath and claimed well fair enough stuff the twat

    • 300
      More Tories Please says:

      Don’t let the facts get in the way of a good dig will you.

    • 312
      Call me Infidel says:

      OK here’s an example. You attend a public ceremony as a dignitary. Lets say you are Gordon Brownstainovich for example laying a wreath at the Cenotaph. Are you trying to say that Brown or the Queen etc. put their hand in their pocket to pay for the wreath? If you think that is the case then you are a brain dead fuckwit.

      • 394

        True – context is key in these cases.

      • 744
        Off to the polls says:

        At last! some commonsense. As an ordinary member of the public I would certainly pay for flowers/wreath etc myself if attending a funeral of a friend or relative. I would donate from my own pocket for lapel poppies, Help for Heroes marathon runners, church collection plate etc. However, I would never be called on to lay a remembrance day wreath – it is done by representatives as part of their role and, as such, it isn’t at all strange to think it might be covered by expenses. The acid test would be – did Tony Blair ever pay for his own remembrance day wreath? About as likely as the chance that his Missus nipped down to the Stationery Office (formerly Her Majesty’s but strangely removed from her) to buy that copy of the Hutton report which was auctioned for party funds.

      • 1066
        Trough Mixture says:

        HM lays her wreath on behalf of the nation. We all shove a couple of Sovs in the Legion tin – don’t we?

        McTwat lays his on behalf of the ‘government’, so they probably send out Hoon or some other sticky fingered clag nut to pinch it back when everyone’s gone.

    • 333
      Anonymous says:

      Keep posting master wanker, with every one you post your beloved party sink deeper in the polls. You are doing a great job. Carry on !

  91. 204
    Anonymous says:

    So. The Poisoned Dwarf resigned because she wants to spend more time at her constitency. Perhaps she should have thought of that when she blatantly made her claims for CGT on two properties.

    If there’s anyone out there who has the knowledge, money and power to take these shysters to Court – please do.

  92. 206
    Craig Brown: The Wheels on the bus come off, come off says:

    As I climbed aboard the coach, I thought there was something familiar about the driver. Perhaps it was his Scottish accent, or that funny thing he did with his mouth.

    ‘Could you tell me where we are going?’ I asked.

    ‘I was brought up to believe that there was only one place to go, and that that was the right place, not the wrong place,’ he said.

    ‘I see,’ I said. ‘But could you be more specific?’

    ‘I hope and trust we can move forward,’ he replied. ‘And, when the time is appropriate, we may continue to move forward. I was brought up to believe that you can only get to where you want to go by moving forward. And that is precisely what I plan to do at this moment in time.

    ‘It is the right course for me, the right course for this coach, and, above all, the right course for all the passengers who are travelling with us.’

    More at…..


  93. 207

    Since you and Dizzy are making the same accusation against Andrew Porter, I feel I should point out that all he was actually doing was drawing attention to the fact that his own newspaper’s expenses scoop played a part in Hazel Blears’ downfall. It is fairly standard practice for journalists to do this, and bloggers too if your repeated attempts to claim the credit for bringing down Peter Hain are anything to go by.

    What Mr Porter actually wrote was: “Hazel Blears’ resignation as Communities Secretary was partly triggered by the discovery that she had allegedly avoided paying capital gains tax on the sale of another property.” I would say that is probably a statement of fact, rather than Downing Street spin.

    • 294

      Apart from the fact that Guido has been told that the trawl of cabinet expenses has yielded menacing information.

    • 294

      Apart from the fact that Guido has been told that the trawl of cabinet expenses has yielded menacing information.

      • 301
        NewGirl says:

        so who else is off guido? Do tell!

      • 319
        moral compass says:

        so come on….when are you really going to stuff Porter?

        • 491
          MI5 says:

          Porter is stuffing himself royally all by himself

          He can’t help it poor chap

          Just has the wrong “freinds” !!

          He’ll be out of ajob soon so don’t worry…

  94. 215
    Anonymous says:

    Brown is such a fucking loser. Blairites? What is a Blairite? That’s a fancy way of calling someone a Hunt.

  95. 223
    Anonymous says:

    Apparent Hazel Blears is going back to knock on more doors.

    That will be her first property, second property, third property, …

  96. 224
    Anonymous says:

    I’d still like to remind every body, that still no one has been arrested or prosecuted with regard to the expenses scandals. All those standing down at the next election will benefit considerably at the taxpayers expense via their parachute payments. No by-elections have been called, no one has stood down yet. Get it into perspective. It’s still very much business as usual. The politicians still do not see that they have done anything wrong.They are still there loking after number one, namely themselves.

    We still have a Labour government that does not have to call a general election until this time next year. Labour are still spinning, sorry lying. Nothing has changed. Me thinks you are all getting too excited.

  97. 234
    Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

    Shouldn’t Nick Brown be called Chief Shit stabber?

  98. 240


  99. 245
    Anonymous says:

    It’s fun to watch the entire labour party tear itself to pieces.

    After 10pm on June 4th (or, more precisely, after around midnight when they start getting an idea of the overall results) they’re going to go into mega-panic mode, and they’ll make their situation 100 times worse. By around noon on June 5th they’ll be in such a mess that an imminent general election will (hopefully) be called. There won’t be time to unseat brown; the momentum for a general election will be too great and having 2 unelected PMs in a row will result in riots by that stage.

  100. 249
    Lofa on the Sofa says:

    @145, a good argument, I have to say I’d hardly considered his lack of experience.

    what had concerned me was that the same people who knew, as some of them certainly did, that Broon was ‘psychologically flawed’ and not up to the job, claimed he was the best man for the job. Now these same people, without consulting the people, are admitting they got it wrong, without actually saying it. Yet instead of calling for a general election as the polls all suggest is demanded by the majority of people. They stick two fingers up to the people, saying ‘it’s none of your business who your prime minister is – this is a Labour party matter.’

    I didn’t agree with Major taking over from Thatcher, Broon from Blair or anyone from this fool. I’ve always felt that when voting in a general election, you are voting for the leader of that party and the people they have surrounded themselves with, not the lobby fodder foisted on my constituency by the parties concerned.

    PS. Cameron pulled his punched at PMQs, is this in the best interests of the country or the conservatives? tells you a lot!

    • 298
      It's all Balls says:

      I thought Cameron was smart today. He painted Brown into a corner ref Darling but he led with soft hands so as not to get the Labour bank benchers riles up. Cameron will know there are plots afoot and the worst thing he could do is rally support for Brown by going for the jugular.

      So if you think an election forced by Brown being unseated is the best thing for Britain – he did well today.

      • 348
        Lofa on the Sofa says:

        Keeping Broon in place would suit Cameron, he remains the greatest asset of the tory party. As long as he’s there, government won’t function properly, debts will rise and Cameron will get a bigger majority when the election finally comes. I’d argue that Cameron is putting long term party interests before the country’s by going easy on Broon, and I want Labour out, now!

        • 828
          Master Baiter says:

          Brown is indeed the greatest gift to the Tory party since The Blessed Margaret seized the helm of this great nation.

          He must be removed

    • 414

      Indeed it wouldn’t matter, if the position of Prime Minister was not imbued with more ower (relatively) that the POTUS himself.

  101. 250
    Postal Vote says:

    Re Blears

    Smearing or not, where are we on the issue that if Blears and other flippers do not hand in revised tax returns, these cheques to HMRC merely represent prepayments of future tax liabilities rather than paying for liabilities that should have arisen in the past.

    • 882
      whatever... says:

      HMRC issued an unprecedented public statement earlier this month relating to this issue. They are renewing their investigation. They are the only one’s who regulate and enforce UK tax law. They told MPs in 2005 that claiming for personal tax advice was inadmissable, and they have given clear guidelines regarding other matters which dishonourable members claim are within THEIR ‘rules’. Their rules are not LAW, as administered by HMRC.

      Awww, poor lil piggies in a pen, covered in their own muck. HMRC will have to clean them up, if only as a warning to other miscreants in the future. That is the law ;-)

  102. 254
    Margaret Thatcher says:

    I’ve got a one incher, can I join you all ?

  103. 272
    Osama Ich Bin Dead says:

    I can project my voice from six feet under

  104. 279
    pauline says:

    Go to Jail DO NOT pass GO!

  105. 280
    Gordon O'Sama Bin Brown says:

    I’m scary, no, really I am.

  106. 281
    pauline says:

    GO to JAIL BITCH!!!

  107. 282
    First!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! says:

    Flint gone 4:18

  108. 285
    Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

    Classic BBC. On Sky Jeff Randall basically said Balls is a useless wanker and not thought well of in the City (Balls was behind robbing our pensions and the slag regulation of the City)

    On the BBC ‘Balls is a genius”

    And we pay these Hunts at the BBC 3.5 billion a year.

    I can’t wait to hear Toenails on the 6PM news that should be a real hoot.

    “A great day for Gordon and Cameron humiliated” will no doubt be Toenails’ line.

    • 499
      MI5 says:

      It is not just the pensions which was a disgrace

      Balls was the arrogant little prick who originally wrote the paper in 1992 recommending complete independence fot the Bank of England

      Shorn of its regulatory powers

      which were given by Brown as Chancellor to the FSA

      with instructions for “‘light touch”‘ regulation

      Balls spent years vaunting this in the City…

      Until it blew up in all our faces..
      Now he just lies and spins about that period…aznd the real causes for our financial implosion…

      Brown is a very intellectually limited (apart from being mentally ill)

      He gobbed all this nonsense proposed by Balls

      Directly producing the financial disaster we all know..

      This is all on the record…

      Balls is a dangerous little man “inebriated by the falsehood of his own bullshit”

      This story must be repeated every time he speaks….

      Only idiiots like Brown and Blair would even listen to a pipsqueak like Blinky !

      And of course Mandlescum does not understand anything about finance or economics (except for fiddling expenses, getting fasle mortgages, cuddling up to Russian oligarchs, organising tax free Euro pensions etc etc) (which was also the approach of lots of City bankers who pillaged the City of London under New Labour with their encouragement)

      Enough for the moment…

      • 689
        Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

        And your list was just starters. Main course would give us a ton of shit on McTwat

    • 504
      Boris says:

      re the BBC

      I have said before here that someone must find the courage to break it up…

      Sell of the profitable parts – documentaries co-producrtions, etc

      Buyers would flock to pay…

      and just wind up the BBC News Service

      They have proven that they are not independent..

      Just wind them up

      We have plenty of other more independent news sources…

      Save ourselves £ 3.5 billion right there

      Easy to do but it needs cojones to depose the overpaid self-appointed frauds at the BBC …

      • 1065
        Lofa on the sofa says:

        there are plenty of state institutions who have a left of center default position. The last 12 years has allowed them to say what they think, because what they think is what Labour think. Today the people will demonstrate that the mood of the country is no longer left of center, will the BBC position itself closer to the center or indeed to the right? don’t hold your breath!

  109. 287
    Ian Dale at it again, the old charmer says:

    Ian Dale’s Blog:

    Readers know that I have a lot of time for Hazel Blears. I do think that she has been one of the more talented Cabinet Ministers, not that she has had a lot of competition for that accolade. But the most important thing is that many of her colleagues underestimate her.


    • 303
      NewGirl says:

      that’s precisely why I’m not a reader, Iain.

    • 374
      Dr Feelgood says:

      Blears was atrocious, but yes, better than many of the others – which says it all really.

      Never have we had a government of so many incompetent, talentless, uncharismatic, devious, lying, duplicitous nobodies.

    • 454
      JonoTheGreat says:

      You depend a lot on gossip from these Hoons, so no surprise that you keep being nice to the socialists

    • 564
      David Dycke says:

      If I wanted to read this sort of stuff I would pick up a copy of Cecil Parkinson’s memoirs.

    • 862
      Anonymous says:

      but she can’t do an interview without being totally patronising in the extreme …

  110. 288
    13eastie says:

    According to Sky News, Braun has issued a statement expressing his hope that Blears will be back in the government before long.

    I noticed he was smiling a lot (despite looking generally moribund) during PMQ’s today. Is it just possible that he has dveloped something approaching a sense of humour?

    Or, perhaps, is he completely shitting himself about what the grubby little minx might say about him on Friday morning?

    • 308
      NewGirl says:

      Hazel; “Sorry Gordon, I’m going to have to defecate over you”
      Gordon; “Defect? Over me? Why, you’ll be back in government in no time Hazel”.

    • 398
      Anonymous says:

      Someone switched his meds

  111. 291
    Anonymous says:

    ‘ow do.

    Cometh the man cometh the hour

    God bless


  112. 305
    John Crudarse says:

    Who is semi detached Dougie Alexander spying for in the Fuehrer’s bunker?

  113. 309

    What’s happening with my perage?

  114. 317
    dr. sipp says:

    10pm thurs night—gord will last as long as the two starship commanders at beginning of new star-trek film


    • 326
      Anonymous says:

      Shit – I haven’t been to see it yet and you’re giving away the plot. Next you’ll be telling me Kirk becomes captain of the Enterprise.

  115. 322
    Moley says:

    Don’t know if anybody else has said this because I’ve only just got in.

    We know that information is going from Downing Street to Telegraph.

    Is it by any possible chance going the other way so that Downing St can use it to blackmail and bully as usual?

    DT Editor Clarify please.

    Guido dig please.

    • 896
      whatever... says:

      Why would Downing Street assist the DT Editor et al unless it was a two way street? Realpolitik. Journos, politicos, policemen, lawyers, doctors…thick as thieves; same ‘skill set’, and egos.

  116. 324
    Brooned off says:

    Where’s that orange cuuunt Hain, why is he so quite, where is he, why hasn’t he gone yet!

  117. 325
    Master Baiter says:

    Brown had a stunning PMQs and knocked seven bells out of Cameron. Even the odiously smug Botox beast female on Sky and the cratered Boulton from the Sky agree.

    Wassap with Cameron?
    Was it having Osborne so close?

    • 346
      Hugh Jardon says:

      you, sir, are tramps cock sucking inbred.

    • 355
      resurgemus says:

      Are you backing the brownites or the blairites when Brown goes ?

    • 362
      Master Baiter says:

      I spend all day doing this guys, saying nasty things about the Tories and nice things about serial wankspanner Gordon. Not something to be proud of!

      Truth is Gordon has gone mad, hence the gurning!

    • 365
      Anonymous says:

      Hmmm…I wonder what The Guardian thinks of Brown?

      It wouldn’t be that he should fuck off would it?

  118. 327
    The PM hopes Hazel Blears will return to Govt "before too long" says:

    Panic and chaos continue. She must know the location of some hefty bodies!


  119. 331
    Gordon Brown BBC says:

    Hazel, come back soon, pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

  120. 335
    Hugh Jardon says:

    according to SKY,
    Brown wants the chipmunk back in the cabinet!!

    what a complete coward & Hunt!

    • 340
      Hugh Jardon says:

      ..I’m a Hunt too…sorry!!

      by the way, I’ve not mentioned that I may have boned Mrs D over the bonnet of my spitfire for a while have I?
      Do i need to????

    • 358
      Mafia Boss says:






      I LOVE IT…

    • 361
      Chipmunk Pride says:


      I always knew Gordon had a sense of humour somewhere

    • 378
      Anonymous says:

      It’s what happens to all Labour Ministers who resign, even twice.

  121. 336
    Anonymous says:

    Nick Robinson on BBC News Channel reporting that John Reid saw Brown last night “to discuss being recalled to Home Office” but turned it down – the official line from No10 is that Brown called Reid in to discuss Celtic Rangers performance

    In another unsubstantiated rumour Robinson said that prior to that eeting Brown called Darling to offer HIM the Home Office which Darling refused

    • 344
      anonymous says:

      Shaun Woodward now likely candidate for Home Office I suspect after a meeting this morning. John Denham to Communities Secretary

      • 385
        Hugh Janus says:

        Sky News report that the rearrangement of the deck chairs is underway tonight.

        • 388
          Anonymous says:

          So they’re rearranging the deck chairs even after the Titanic has sunk?

        • 587
          Robert Ballard says:

          Brown is now busy getting on with the job of rearranging the deckchairs on RMS Carpathia, having been rescued this morning from an empty lifeboat wearing an evening dress.

          Unfortunately for Gordon (and not a lot of people know this) on the 17th July 1918 RMS Carpathia was struck by three torpedoes off Southern Ireland and sank the same day.

          The curse of Jonah indeed.

  122. 342
    Gordon's glass eye says:

    Guido I and i’m sure others would be grateful if you put this article up on the main page for comment.

    Private Eye, issue 584, 4 May 1984. ‘New Boys column’

    Dr Gordon Brown

    The new Labour member for Dunfermline East, Dr Gordon Brown, is typical of the brand of mediocre, middle-class careerists who make up an increasing proportion of the undistinguished lobby-fodder and whom Labour habitually returns from Scotland, though he has greater academic pretensions than most.

    Brown shot to provincial fame on being elected as Edinburgh University’s first student Rector in the late 1960s and ever since his ambition has outstripped his ability. Although, in a tribute, his old history tutor Dr Paul Addison has stated that Brown was “always more than a swot”, it appears that he lacked certain essential social graces. He never fully recovered from his rejection as suitor by the lovely Princess Marguerita of Romania (who works as a computer programmer in the University’s Computer Department) and ever since has devoted himself obsessively to his political career.

    Before becoming Labour’s Scottish Chairman (a meaningless appointment made on the “Buggins’ Turn” principle) Brown worked on a series of current affairs documentaries for Scottish TV which were so excruciatingly dull that he was mercifully taken off the air (he has two brothers in the Scots media).

    Once again he has been exceeding his limitations in his new role as a Scots lackey in the outer limits of Kinnock’s kitchen cabinet. A recent Sunday Times article which he had ghosted for the new labour leader had to be withdrawn as “hopeless” by Kinnock’s press officer, Patricia “Harpie” Hewitt.

    In June, Brown will enjoy a three-week CIA freebie trip to the USA (he will get $60 a day pocket money while out there.) Kinnock felt obliged to approve this unfashionable hostage to fortune because he himself had been on a similar trip some years ago.

  123. 343
    dr. sipp says:

    labour backbenchers

    watch new star trek film—get an idea what you have too do

  124. 347
    MI5 says:




    • 379
      Moley says:

      The Telegraph is the other source with the information.

      • 404
        Boris says:

        And using information criminally obtained for blackmail is a serious CRIMINAL OFFENCE…

        And these gangsters don’t even know it !!

        Theyc ommit crimes every day…

    • 390
      Mafia Boss says:




  125. 353
    Master Baiter says:

    What is the real relationship between Julie Kirkbride, John Redwood and the Starship Enterprise?

    • 363
      resurgemus says:

      They discovered an alien called Yvette and brought it back to earth – much to their eternal shame

    • 381
      Anonymous says:

      Who fucking cares, we’re watching a government implode?

  126. 356
    dr. sipp says:


  127. 357
    Rog says:

    Sky reporting that the re-shuffle is underway NOW.

  128. 360
    Insider says:

    Sky news – reshuffle underway!!

    • 410
      Deckchair Attendant RMS Titanic says:

      Oh, no !! Are you sure you’re not wasting time, Captain ??

  129. 369
    Snotty says:

    Sky News are now reporting that the reshuffle is underway! Is McHunt trying to secure his position before leaving for France?

    • 415
      crackers says:

      McHoon is the cleverest of all the NuLab on the make types. He realised in 97 that Blair-Brown called all the shots. McHoon focused his attention not on Defence or Roads or Europe or Whatever but on ‘Whats in it for Me’. He swallowed shit by the bucketload whilst optimising Expenses.

      He may be a hoon but he is Fucking Rich Hoon.

      • 431
        Snotty says:

        Sorry, I should have been clearer. I was actually referring to McTwat aka Snotty aka Broon. I guess there are just too many hoons in this “Government”. It’s hard to keep up!

  130. 371
    Am Snot Two aka Tom Watson MP says:

    Adolph Balls and Mandelson Ballsed up the Chipmunk shafting.

    I had nothing to do her sacking. If I had, she would stay sacked.

    Now , the wimps plus Der Fuehrer are having a large dose of the vapours and are booking themselves into the overflowing Priory.

    Even Farmer Nick Brown is running out of manure to cover their sorry asses.

    • 660
      Cheshire Cat says:

      Nick Brown a farmer?

      I thought he was a gardener, of the uphill variety…

  131. 376
    ron Vibentrop says:

    Have a look at http://www.snoutintrough.com and VOTE.

  132. 380
    TARTWATCH says:

    Brown has cracked.


  133. 382
  134. 383
    dr. sipp says:

    Beeb reporting that PM and John Reid met last night at Downing Street and that John Reid was offered his old job of running the ‘not fit for purpose’ Home Office. He reportedly declined.

    PM is also reported to have offered the position to Alistair Darling, who has also declined it.

    PM is now finished—his plotting against blair all these years–now its payback time by the blairites

  135. 384
    • 436
      Alan Philip Bonggg says:

      Makes sense for Brown to sack half of his cabinet before they get the chance to resign

  136. 386
    bandersnatch says:

    Have any of Guido’s really reliable informants actually seen the ‘get lost Gordon’ letter supposedly circulating amongst back benchers?… There is always a rumour of such a missive in hard times, whoever is the beleaguered PM. Is it a House of Commons myth this time?

    • 433
      Anonymous says:

      Dale says there was 40 signed by 1pm.

      make of that what you will.

    • 487
      bergen says:

      Its existence was mentioned as breaking news at the end of PM just before 6 on Radio 4.

  137. 391
    Yobbo. says:

    Labour OUT OUT OUT


    I’m gonna happy slap some lefties tommorow and put it on youtube init as well, get on the telly.

    You should all join in

    Happy Slap A Leftie Day init yoofs.

    Make it national oliday.

  138. 393
    Hermann Fegelein..Im off..but I think I might get shot says:

    it’s madness down here in Q/whitehall

  139. 407
    Rt Hoon Alistair Darling says:

    I will remain Chancellor of the Exchequer.

  140. 413
    Kirkcaldy Loyal says:

    We still love you Gordon.

    Please don’t be so mean to our wee laddie.

  141. 416
    Anonymous says:

    Lord Mandelson is in Downing street now telling Gordon Brown his time is up!
    Sky News*****

    • 427
      Anonymous says:

      Darling has let it be known “via a friend” that he will categorically turn down any job offered to him other than remaining as Chancellor of the Exchequer and go to the backbenches if needs be(Doubtlesss to spend more time with his family;constituents or to write his memoirs)

    • 455
      DIGNITAS Switzerland says:

      Mr.Gordon Brown ??

      Got hundreds of thousands of people from all over the (dis) United Kingdom booking you in.

      Can we do you now, sir ???

      • 460
        Rick Nobinson says:

        Fuck !! Let me climb out from up his arse first !!

        Where do I go now ??

        • 625
          Lord Mandelson to you, Nils Blythe says:

          Over here, young man, but take those dreadful specs off first.

    • 478
      Old Granny says:

      I love it when Labour go CANNIBAL

      Is someone eating Gordon’s BALLS then ?

      Do tell me WHO ?

      (Grandpa tells me I should not be so vulgar…)

  142. 426
    charleyfarley says:

    Re Nick Brown.

    Was at school with him. Didn’t like him then, even less now. Too much of a bully.

  143. 429
    Cherie Booth Housewife and Superwoman QC., says:

    This cabinet chaos would not have happened in my Tony’s time.

    The Prime Minister has my continuing support. Tony knows that.

  144. 432
    Vince Cable MP and Star of TV and Radio says:

    I am available to serve the country, Gordon, please.

  145. 435
    Master Baiter says:

    Euro opinion showing

    Conservitude 24, Labour 22, Limp Dumb 14, WEKIP 17, Green 15,

    Very interesting

    • 441
      Sub Editor says:

      Commissioned by the Greens.

      Here’s another like that

      Com Res/Soviet

      Communist 100%

      Do the math you twonk.

      • 447
        Master Baiter says:

        It makes you wince though doesn’t it?

        You know why? Because it’s accurate.

        Duck island, tennis court, helipad, moat, horse manure

        These are the things that people find hard to swallow and that stick in their minds.

        • 465
          P.Handlesman says:

          I tried to swallow the horse manure; think I’ll just stick to the real thing.

        • 503
          Anonymous says:

          Yeah, that’s why Labour are gonna barnstorm into third place.


      • 656
        Anonymous says:

        Because it’s accurate

        How can an opinion poll be accurate? By its very nature it is a guess. If such things were accurate, Ladbrokes would be in liquidation.

        MB I think you owe thick as thieves a pint. If it were not for him, you’d be the doziest get on this blog.

        Anyway come back on Friday if you dare.

        • 780
          thick as thieves says:

          cheeky c’unt.
          you are too dozey to even think of a name you silly sp@stic!

    • 443
      It's all Balls says:

      Not long until the real poll.

    • 508
      Benny says:

      Go fourth Labour

      In Prezza’s Bus


  146. 438
    Sub Editor says:

    Not so fast oh great Fenian.

    Two more resignations tonight to hit news at Ten.

    The die is cast.

  147. 439
    Stephen Byers says:

    I am available to serve my country, Gordon, you swine.

    • 473
      Railtrack Shareholder says:

      I would nt let you serve me a hamburger, you snivelling little git.

  148. 440
    Dave H. says:

    Nick Brown is a ‘Shit-Kicker’.

    I’ve heard him called something very similiar to that before, though on that occasion his preferred weapons were knives rather than boots.

  149. 444
    David Milliband MP says:

    I wish to spend some time with my family.

    ( = About 48 hours to dump the Scottish weirdo )

    • 448
      Ed Milliband MP says:

      Fuck off, you creep!

      • 452
        David Milliband MP says:

        You can have a job in my cabinet, you mad ass Broonnoser.

        You are not after the job too????

        • 475
          Ed Milliband MP says:

          Seriously, fuck off you little Hunt.

          You’re an areshole. Mum and Dad always said you would turn out a complete twat.

          Go and spend some time with someone-else’s family. We want nothing to do with you, shit-head.

          You cocksucker.

        • 607
          EdBallsBalls says:

          Don’t look at me….

    • 485
      Arrogant fool says:

      I’m going to be Foreign Secretary “for 4 more years”

      So there !!!

    • 526
      Haringey Hortense says:

      Yah! You’re both adopted

  150. 445
    Alan Johnson MP says:

    I wish to spend more time with my family.

    • 510
      Anonymous says:

      Get back to your post, private !

    • 629
      Alan Johnson says:

      …until after Gordon (or a caretaker leader) loses the next election very badly, then I’ll parade them in front of the cameras to demonstrate my family-man credentials in my bid to become leader.

      Now all we need is a whipping boy to become temporary leader until the election. Has anyone seen Jack Straw…?

  151. 448
    Harriet Harman Terribly Important WOMAN MP says:

    I wish to spend more time with real women. Thank you Gordon and David, that will be enough.

  152. 456
    Captain Smith - Ice, what ice, oh fuck did that come from America says:

    I’ve got Mandlebum up in ma crowsnest, he’ll watch oot for me

    • 469
      Major Bumsore says:

      Make sure he does nt try and migrate south from your crowsnest to your arsecrack.

      • 477
        Captain Smith - Ice, what ice, oh fuck did that come from America says:

        I’ve got ma wee chastity belt on, wi a canny wee chomping bit in, he’ll na get thro’ it.

        But your canny warning fair gave ma wee tears running doon ma mast pole.

        • 481
          Brace !! Splice the man::No. I mean splice the mainbrace says:

          Oooooh !! NOW I see what Gormless has been going on about…
          It’s all part his ‘apparatus’


    • 483
      Boris says:

      Mandelbum has his own private lift raft you know

      He never has a problem when ships sink…

      The others die but never him..

      Even though he is the cause of the generalised crime, corruption and collapse…

      His life raft is reserved for select women and children…Direction Corfu…or is that Russia ?

      • 496
        Brace !! Splice the man::No. I mean splice the mainbrace says:

        Not sure Boris….I suspect he’ll volunteer to down on…..on all fours….and then on the crew….

      • 712
        Boris says:

        Aint’ no motherfuckers like McBride and Draper where I am…!!


        We do not put up with that sort of scum here…

        But I am not anywhere near you…mystery…

        • 742
          :--) says:

          I’m darn Sarf, Boris. We must stop meeting like this or Guido will charge us parking fees HAHA !!

          Just relaxing now waiting for the Private Ambulance to arrive in Downing Street. There must be lots of dead Nokias to bury..

  153. 457
    Pope Tony I says:

    Don’t worry Gordon. Slot Gob has already booked you a room at the retirement home.

  154. 459
    Mrs Gordon Broon's Diary says:

    The men in the white coats are asking to see you, Gordon.

    Be with you in a moment , dear, I am speaking to the men in grey suits.

  155. 467
    Anonymous says:

    What was that on Sky a minute ago about an email campaign by backbenchers to oust Brown? Any news?

  156. 474
    Tartwatch says:

    According to Iain Dale, Blunderer Blunkett is back at the cabinet table.

    • 482
      No one left at the helm of state says:

      He’ll be busy looking for a bit of braille fanny soon enough.

      • 484
        Benny says:

        Really will be the blind leading the blind…

        Nurse……please do something…

      • 684
        Cheshire Cat says:

        Apparently he found a girl with a full Brazilian, but had to make do with just the girl, ’cause the full Brazilian was Mandelbum’s boyfriend.

    • 494
      Anonymous says:

      So will he be in line for a third £18K redundancy payment when he gets sacked again ?

      He’ll never need to claim for dog food.

      • 514
        Boris says:

        They are serial resigners these people

        All this fucking dirty linen

        Makes me quite ill

        We now know why

        They get their zillions without going to JAIL !!

      • 644
        David Spunkedit says:

        I just want to shag somebody else’s wife and have more illegitimate kids and all I get is grief from you people….I mean, what’s wrong with you non-MPs ??

        • 714
          Benny says:

          Calm down

          We will leave you in peace now

          Well done for having turned down the offer from Dirty Tricks !!

    • 534
      No one left at the helm of state says:

      I’m sure he’s the one who said and quite honestly for once,” I can’t see any illegal immigrants”

  157. 489
    Anonymous says:

    I’m getting up early tomorrow so I can show all those B’stards from the main 3 parties exactly what i think of them all.

    I’m voting for that bloke from Watford who’s party fecked off the EU.

    Looking forward to the results as well.

  158. 493
    Anonymous says:

    Hazel Blears to be replaced “Shortly” ? That rules out the fragrant and slightly taller Caroline Flint (Phoar!!) Or has she also gone back to her constituents at grass roots?

  159. 495
    John Du Bois says:

    Hazel Blears to be replaced “shortly”? That rules out the fragrant and slightly taller Caroline Flint. (Phoar!!) Or has she gone back to her own constituents and grass roots aswell?

  160. 497
    John Du Bois says:

    Sorry, 4got me handle there

  161. 498
    Anonymous says:

    Swine Flu

    “Britain is one of the worst affected countries outside North America”

    Didn’t Gordon tell us a few weeks ago we were “best place to cope” etc.

  162. 500
    michel de montaigne says:

    good news, brown has just picked another cabinet minister…………………………………………………………………………from his nose

  163. 502
    Alan Philip Bonggg says:

    Hazel Blears has insisted that the £13,000 she is to pay back was for both properties. It was widely reported that the property that had been the main focus had gained £45k in value. I make that £8.1K capital gains tax owed so presumably the rest of the £13k was for somewhere else. But of course, no-one spotted it until now (even though she mentioned both properties on her website) so she had to resign right now without further delay and for that reason only. Obviously.

    • 543
      It doesn't add up... says:

      She bought for £200k – so £2k in Stamp Duty and say £500 conveyancing. Sold for £245k, less say another £500 conveyancing, and 1.5% estate agent fee, so a profit of about £39k after allowable costs, less about £8k CGT allowance gives taxable gain of about £31k at 40% (no taper relief) is ~£12k. How do you get £8.1k?

  164. 505
  165. 513
    Mandy says:

    Speaking of copy takers, the same thing seems to have happened with the “Balls for Treasury” stories circulating yesterday. Even Erwin was at it!


    • 519
      Boris says:

      It is SIMPLY UNBELIEVABLE that a Telegrapg correspondent can say “Balls is respected in the City”

      He is DESPISED by everyoine who knows the twin disister of BoE independence and “light touhc” regulation

      I have seldom seem an article so far from the truth

      The Telegraph has become a DISGRACE to journalism…

    • 522
      Boris says:

      These telegraph journalists are not even journalists

      They are cheap propoganda hacks for a totally despicable government

      At the same level as the BBC

      No objectivity and no independence (and juding by this article completely and totally ignorant)

      How low can they fall ?
      (except for Ben Brogan !)

  166. 517
    Lucy aged 12 says:

    dear Jim,
    Can you fix it for me to be massivley in debt for the rest of my life and pass this on to my own grandchildren and ensure there is no state pension for the bleating little cnunts to fall back on. My Mum says your a twat. Thank u. Lucy, aged 12

    • 655
      Broken Briton says:

      Yes, of course, Lucy. Come back when you’re 13 and pregnant and we’ll sort you out with a council house and some lone parent benefits.

  167. 523
    Anonymous says:

    Sky News has the letter from MP’s to get Brown to step down, its fact now.

    • 540
      Trough Mixture says:

      That’s buggered it. Matey at sky has just held it up to camera with the addy they’re supposed to reply to clearly visible. Feckin’ server will be overloaded in a couple of minutes!

  168. 527
    alfonso de gonzo says:


    A hotmail conspiracy afoot!

  169. 528
    ShugNiggurath says:

    There’s the email on SKY News;

    Dear Gordon,

    Over the last 12 years in government and before you have made an enormous difference…blah blah blah

    …However it’s time to go.


    Post your intentions when ready to:

  170. 529
    Agent 99 says:

    Apologies if this already posted but its moving fast and travelling so get links occasionally

    Up to 70 MP’s reported to be signing a ‘Get McTwat out now’ letter and it appears they are saying 100+ by Friday

    It don’t look good for the Son of the manse.

    • 544
      nearlyheadlessnicky says:

      This is the end for the person formerly know as the Prime Minister.

  171. 529
    Ratsniffer says:

    As the infighting continues it cannot be long before one of them breaks ranks and sticks the boot into snotgobbler’s aching, withered nuts. Not like Blears may have done – a proper “et tu Brute?” moment is required.

    I suggest the day after tomorrow might be a good time not to bury bad news – when the results of the elections are being digested and labour finally realises that it is dead, buried, and finished with its MPs trussed up like stinking, mouldy kippers festering in a dustbin.

    Will the Laughing Postie be PM by the end of the month? If so, could you please get your mates to stop dropping those rubber bands all over my path? There’s a good chap…

    • 723
      Naughty Granny says:

      And to deliver on time

      Thats a good fellow…

      But he is so lightweight the Postie that I fear he will be carried away by the Summer Wind alone…

    • 729
      The Overpromoted Postie says:

      When I become Prime Minister

      I will appoint the Poison Dwarf straight away as my personal body guard…

      With orders to screw anyone before they get anywhere near me…

      That way I will govern in peace

  172. 535
    Ratsniffer says:

    Snotgobbler must be grabbing the works of art and jewelry and thinking about a nice retirement in south america….

  173. 536
    alfonso de gonzo says:

    a scoop! i can die a happy man.

  174. 537
    signonnow@hotmail.com says:

    goodbye gordon you moronic hoon

  175. 542
    Gordon Broon says:

    it wasnae me

  176. 546
    The Master says:

    The PLOT letter exists! Sky have it

  177. 551
    Agent 99 says:

    Dales Blog reporting

    Blunkett Says No to Brown
    Iain Dale 6:50 PM

    “I understand from a senior Labour source that David Blunkett has refused an invitation from Gordon Brown to rejoin the Cabinet for a third time”

    It really must be all over for him now when even the crook Blind Pew refuses to get out of the lifeboat and back onto the ‘Browntanic’

    • 563
      Agent 99 says:

      Sorry to reply to my own post (sad I know)

      Jsut that second as I posted I saw blind Pew on Ch4 news indicating support for Brown and now’s the time to support him ya de yah de yah etc etc
      The man had to be lying outright to the camera if Dalesblog is right as the best way to support the Mental twat is to join in and fight from the inside.

      Browns a gonner and beyond redemption. Just a matter of days now and I suspect and don’t be at all surprised when you hear as soon as he has got his photocall with Obamarama he has needed to hurry back from the beaches.

      Your Maj. Suggest you keep your diary open for the next few days.

      • 594
        Tattooed_Arry says:

        Now we know why the Queen was unable to attend the D Day Commemoration.

    • 583
      Awaiting Moderation says:

      That’s a shame. I wanted to trot out the old adage “In the country of the blind the one-eyed man is king”.

      Perhaps I will anyway.

    • 1029
      Reid Told Brown: STAND DOWN says:

      Reports earlier today said that Gordon Brown offered John Reid the job of Home Secretary in a secret meeting last night in Downing Street. What the media haven’t reported is that not only did John Reid turn the job down, he told the Prime Minister he should resign. I am told that this is how the conversation went.

      Brown: Will you be my Home Secretary?
      Reid: No
      Brown: You have to support me.
      Reid: No I don’t. I have to support my country and my party, and that means
      you have to stand down.


  178. 552
    Dack Blog says:

    Dale and Holton and Duffy on Sky.

  179. 553
    Anonymous says:

    There is a rumour that the Labour whips have circulated the Gordon Resign now email to smoke out the Rebels! Those who have signed it will look chumps!

    Just think how he could find a reason to desect them and the golden goodbye they would loose! Gordon is a sly bugger! All about the money!

    • 568
      Ginger Minger - Dont rock the Browntanic says:


      Toenails just read it out on Aljabeeba

      Something along the lines of

      You are a totally mental twat which gives fuckwittery a good name do please go now.

      or something like that

  180. 559
    Miliband says:

    Dear Gordon,

    Over the last 12 years in government, and before, you have made an enormous contribution to this country and to the Labour Party, and this is widely acknowledged.

    However we are writing now because we believe that in the current political situation, you can best serve the Labour Party and the country by stepping down as party leader and prime minister.

    And so allowing the party to find a new leader to take us into the next general election.



    • 665
      nell says:

      A little while ago Millitwit person said he was interested in moving on to working in the United Nations (presumably because the remunerations there are even greater than can be gleaned from being in the UK cabinet).

      Why has he subsequently said (ridiculously) that he is looking forward to staying as Foreign Minister for the next four years. Does he have any intelligence ???

      Does he really think that this GE which is coming down the tracks like an express train with failed brakes, is going to return Labour to power???

      • 728
        Miliband says:

        I’m pretending to be as mad as he is so I can get close enough to stab him in the back.

      • 857
        MI5 says:

        and UN pay and pensions are tax free

        Like Mandy’s payments from the European Union

        They know how to organise tax free income these Labour thieves

  181. 567
    Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

    Jack Straw , Channel 4 News. 5mins ago:
    “He’s a man (McMental) who has been very decisive”

    FFS – Beam me up, Scotty – the Cabinet has gone crazy.
    Call the Queen !

    • 575
      Ghost of Danny La Rue says:

      Someone call?

    • 588
      Call me Infidel says:

      Vaz is 100% behind him….so that’s alright then.

      • 626
        Trough Mixture says:

        Slime will show the wiser….

      • 657
        nell says:

        Vaz , knowing that Gordon is struggling to find people to fill major cabinet posts , is publicly praising gordon in the hope that Gordon hears and offers him a significant cabnet post.

        Sadly Vaz may be playing the right game !!!!!!!!

        Vaz for Home Office?????!!!!!!!!!!

      • 680
        Spook says:

        Vaz is 100% behind everyone.

        • 756
          R.McGeddon says:

          As someone famously commented, ” Your opponents are before you and your enemy are behind you ” Having The Rt. Hoonarable Keith Vaseline behind you would be a slight worry

        • 872
          nell says:

          753- a bit like the French in WW2 then???

        • 911
          Torrey Canyon says:

          Vaz – the first human oil slick

  182. 571
    Anonymous says:

    Iain Dale says that Blunkett and Reid have both turned down Cabinet posts in the reshuffle. Perhaps that can’t see Snotty lastig much longer.

    • 645
      Anonymous says:

      Is that Sandy Tosvig’s brother?

      • 768
        Mr. Chimney says:

        You’re confusing them with Jacqui Smith’s husband, Richard Tostoff.

    • 677
      Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

      Reid’s already got his hands full with a bunch of Losers.
      Doesn’t want to join another one.

  183. 573
    Anonymous says:

    It’s time Brown asked for his personal protection officers Glock semi-auto and retreated into his bunkers living room.

    • 604
      13eastie says:

      For historical accuracy, a Walther PPK would be the weapon of choice.

      Given that Braun’s head could well be bone all the way through, the FN Five-seveN would be a more sensible option.

      Maybe he tested the cyanide on Blunkett’s dog?

  184. 576
    dirtyden says:

    The email’s been leaked. Things are accelerating! Here it is…


    • 653
      nell says:

      OK you are saying they only need fifty names – somewhere earlier I read they need seventy names – to force Gordon to step down so that they can elect a new Leader.

      Which is it? And do they have any chance of raising it?

      • 734
        dirtyden says:

        They expect to get between 75 and 100 (rumour has it). The 50 mark is almost certainly part of the labyrinthine Labour party bullshit rules. Or they’re making it up as they go along (far more likely).

    • 690
      CSE needlework init says:

      FFS, who came up with the wording?

      Fucking comprehensive Hoons.

      • 765
        Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

        It’s real. 100%
        Just look at the syntax.
        It’s most definitely comprehensive Nu-Labour.
        Education, Education, Education.

        • 1086
          Alan Johnson says:

          Agreed. The letter is disgraceful, illiterate and vapid. Someone should get a pupil from a decent grammar school to write something less risible for them. If I received a letter like that one, I’d send it back with a note saying “and your point is?”. I would also add “PS. – You have sent this to the wrong person – I am not Prime Minister”.

  185. 580
    Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:


    If McMental resigns, what is the % chance there is an immed GE.
    The reason I ask is that I suspect NuLabour will not allow that GE but it was almost a foregone conclusion, previously, that it was politically impossible for the filth to subject the electorate to TWO consecutive unelected PMs.

    Has anything changed in the last 3 months ?

    • 751
      Anonymous says:

      It is a question of momentum. There have been a lot jokes here about McFuhrer etc. I can see there being a McDonitz.

      If they have their arses kicked Thursday and then there is second round on Monday the government’s position could become untenable. I think that is why Blears went now. Imagine if she went Friday or over the weekend after the event. Not a question of adding momentum but more when is that momentum added. It isn’t a question of what happens it is more a question of what could happen. Imagine if they stay in situ over summer and then the CPS decide to prosecute over expenses. They are living on a hair trigger and therefore can’t function.

      Let’s see what happens with that back bencher signature campaign.

      I agree what really has happened over the last 3 months? MPs standing down at the next election aren’t bi-elections.

  186. 585
    cut him loose says:

    How many resignations does it take to change a lightbulb ?

  187. 589
    The female of the species is more.... says:

    As predicted Hazel Blears IS the suicide bomber who does it for Gordon.

    • 648
      nell says:

      She hasn’t been completely successful we need a few more yet!!!! cFLINT? perhaps??

      Or what about purnell – not much chance from such a self serving- “I’m in it for what I can get” sort of person.

      No doubt he and martin got along really fine.

      Shame – ” It can get only get better” is just coming to it’s natural conclusion -albeit with a bit of a bang!!!!!!!

      • 899
        MI5 says:

        She has been damned good

        The Blackmailer Brown tried “to persaude” her to put off her resisngation until Friday

        She knew the No 10 Dirty Tricks Department would then Smear her (as usual)

        and went ahead

        Good girl…

        Courageous I would say…

        Far more cojones than anyone else in this Criminal Goverment

        • 1004
          I love Hazel says:


          Good riddance to the hypocritical troughing stuck up arrogant bitch.

  188. 595
    Decimation Thursday says:

    Not long now.

  189. 596
    Gordon Brown says:

    I have decided to step down and concentrate on my other businesses.

    For those MPs who are looking for another second home, they might like to see my new listings:


  190. 601
    shellingout says:

    Whilst I applaud the plans to rid us of this oaf, Gordon Brown, replacing him with another expense-exploiting, self-serving politician is defeating the object. If Labout are to have any credibility with the public, they need to call a General Election. It is for us to decide who runs this country, not them!

  191. 606
    Tony Blair says:

    I am still waiting for my phone to ring !!!

    • 1092
      Alan Johnson says:

      Hi Tony, still on for the BBQ at yours on Sunday? Alan and Stephen are cooking things up, and Hazel will bring some carrots. Will Cherie be there as well, or are you expecting Gordon to attend?

  192. 612
    Pip says:

    Why are there 4 policemen waddling behind Hazel Blears at the Manchester railway station ? Has Gordon moved on from chucking Nokias ?

  193. 615
    Giovanni Drogo says:

    SKY reporting
    Last Euro poll before election tomorrow showing NuLAB on 16%!!!
    UKIP/Green/BNP to hoover up third of votes.
    Tories on 26%
    Rebels to publish letter when it hits 50 names

    It’s the end for you Gordon!

  194. 617
    lolol says:

    PoliticalBetting.com has a Euro Poll.

  195. 618
  196. 619
    Anonymous says:

    Dale reports Blunkett turning down job offer from Brown.
    Isn’t it fantabulous?

    • 638
      nell says:

      I read earlier that John Reid had done likewise. Surely Brown is in deep trouble if he can’t find enough people to accept cabinet posts.

      Lost the confidence of his own cabinet and his backbenchers? Trip to the Queen then. That of course, is David Cameron’s preferred option.

      Well we can dream!!!!!!

      • 711
        Anonymous Misogynist says:

        Let’s hope the fat lady is clearing her throat as we speak, but don’t be surprised if the ‘One Eyed’ has something up his sleeve.

        • 717
          nell says:

          SuBo not quite ready yet. Needs a few more days in the Priory Clinic. But when she is ready – she’ll sound magnificent.

        • 748
          Anonymous Misogynist says:

          Ha, Ha, very nearly put SuBo down as a ‘Prime Suspect’, didn’t want to be accused of being Fatist.

  197. 620
    Gordon Brown says:

    I’m coming on here because I can’t find YouTube.

    Now listen to me for a minute.

    I am getting on with the job. The job of sorting out the expenses thingy. I am also getting on with the job of sorting out the economy.

    Shit, that’s two jobs!

    No wonder I’m tired.

    Anyway, I’m the only man who can do this because it’s what I’ve been doing all my life, from my Presbyterian beginnings right through school, through my university studies then my home studies and hiding in the cupboard which makes me an expert at bunker technology ask Damien Duff, he’ll tell you.

    Antway, where was I? Agh, yes, only me and me alone can save you from the terrible destiny that awaits you all. Don’t believ what the do-nothing Tories say or the Liberals they are rubbish. Just believ me when I say I feel your pain and I hope it goes away soon when I have completed my jobs, both of them.

    Vote BNP, sorry vote LabourLost

  198. 623
    Moley says:

    How do you verify signatures on an e mail?

  199. 627
  200. 635
    pleb says:

    Any chance of getting our real lives back?

    Who would be best for achieving this, I feel I can’t wait much longer….

  201. 640
    A NON says:

    Ester Rantzen on radio 4: wanting to be an independent MP on the subject of moral authority. Ester Rantzen ‘world’s greatest expert on expenses and freebies’ when she worked at the BBC…..WTF

    • 670
      Boris says:

      and husband stealing…

    • 820
      Cheshire Cat says:

      And we have enough Levantines in Parliament anyway – any more and we may as well call it the Knesset.

      Time was, when the buggers were banned from even standing…

  202. 647
    Anonymous says:

    Breaking News

    Sky News are reporting that Mandelson has visited Brown this evening to tell him he must resign.

    • 685
      The Director of Politically Correct ‘n Convenient Troof at AlJaBeeba, the State Broadcaster, says:


      If MincingBum told him anything, it would be how pretty he looked.

      Get a decent news channel – AlJABeeba for instcne

    • 688
      DIGNITAS Switzerland says:

      Come out, Brown, come out !!! Bring Handelsman with you and we’ll do you both on a BOGOF…………

    • 763
      Overpromoted Postie says:

      Breaking news

      Brown has just invited Prescott to become Deputy Prime Minister

  203. 649
    NewGirl says:

    guido please put up new thread1 This one’s all over the place again and I’m sure there’s loads to talk about…Please….!

    • 674
      M.T.BUCKET says:

      Think Guido may be enjoying a celerbratory pint.

    • 695
      Anonymous Misogynist says:

      Now, now, everything comes to he who wait’s.

    • 732
      nell says:

      Not yet New Girl- not yet. There are things happening tonight, let’s just wait a bit.

      Amazingly – the media , and us , are not concentrating on tomorrow’s election – but events ‘happening’ in No.10.

      I’ve lived a long time, at least I feel I have – and I don’t ever remember a political upheaval that even resembles this one.

      Good watching!!!!! Wonder what MrsT in her heyday would have made of it????

      • 741
        NewGirl says:

        I know Nell, its so exciting…I’m trying to work with one eye on Guido, one eye on clock (don’t want to miss news) and wishing I knew what was going on in the bunker. NOT very conducive to work. So far I’ve resisted wine, but its only a matter of time! We’ve got news then newsnight, what are you doing (blooddy last episode of Desp Housewives tonight too, bugger, oh well, this will hopefully be funnier)

      • 747
        Anonymous says:


      • 753
        Anonymous Misogynist says:

        Slow deep breaths required and a nice bottle of Rioja, enjoy.

    • 752
      Boris says:

      and when we get to about 750 posts the whole shebang collapses like last night..!

      • 755
        Benny says:

        Like the Government…

      • 769
        NewGirl says:

        Yes it bloody will. Prob just as something really interesting happens….

        • 776
          Boris says:

          Crossed messages

          Not surprising

          I’m writing from the West Indies…

        • 781
          Boris says:

          I think the most interesting thing tonite will be that Prezza is promoted to become Deputy prime Minister again

          There is no one else left…

        • 785
          NewGirl says:

          Bloody hell boris, are you? how exciting. Whaddya doing, cricketing?

        • 791
          Boris says:


          But watch the Windies of course…

          I’m actually putting in safe storage one of the copies of the expenses file in case any Labour Gangster tries something silly in London..

          Apart from that enjoying myself with the sultry ladies here (true !)…

        • 796
          NewGirl says:

          Ha ha still exciting! Make sure you hide it well!!

        • 803
          Boris says:

          It’s in “safe hands”…no worry about that…

          There is a huge conspiracy going on now to get these rogues out as you probably know…

          A lot of people in a lot of places…

          Many outside of the jurisdiction of UK Courts for obvious reasons

          But it has worked and we will just have to clean up now…

          I’m waiting for my first Planter’s Punch now…It’s about 5.00 p.m. here !

          Getting late for you…

        • 805
          Boris says:

          Any news from no 10 ?

          Did Mandy actually go and see GB ?

          Or was that spin ?

        • 818
          Boris says:

          Still got my eye on ya New Girl !

          Tell us iof anything interesting happens at 10 your time please…

      • 814
        NewGirl says:

        dunno, haven’t heard. Boris are you a very important spy or just trying to impress me? (Hell, wait till Twat comes across this later, Anon Misog is right, he’ll crucify me in his own inimitable style ha ha…)

        • 823
          Boris says:

          Just doing my job…

          and enjoying it…

          But low profile

          I like it that way…

        • 839
          Boris says:

          Don’t worry

          You have powerful protection here…

          These Labour jerks are infants when it comes to the real stuff..

          (and I mean non-criminal but devasatating answers to their criminality)

          And I’m not trying to impress..

          I’m just an interesting pretty ordinary sort of guy with some good international experience…!

          Who’s on at 10 ??

        • 864
          NewGirl says:

          Mandlebum…the only one dragged out on both channels…looks a bit pale I’d say…

        • 868
          Boris says:

          Hardly suprising

          He’s spent half the day with the MadMan

          He must know it is the end…

          The backbenchers seem to have 70-80 signatures for PM must go according to the Times Online..

          Toast I would say for GB

  204. 651
    Jim says:

    I think there is a income tax liability here rather than merely CG tax – the level of transactions would indicate a ‘real estate trader’ in tax terms, rather than merely a taxpayer cashing in on occassional investments. (which would imply a CG liabiity perhaps). In the year when the tax was due, the marginal tax rate of income tax for higher rate taxpayers was 40%. Now it is 50%. So in order to get ‘off the hook’, Hazel Blaears etc, how much tax do you need to through at the camera/IR now? Bad luck criminals – its up to the IR how miuch tax you pay in cases of evasion – it is also up to IR whether or not to prosecute in such cases. PISSFEAR AND FUCK YOU WORTHLESS SCUM.

  205. 663
    Loch Ness Monster says:

    Some people have common sense and the ability to read situations and some people do not.

    Tony Blair was one – but his ego took over.

    Gordon Brown is not one. As Chancellor the signs were there – at budget time he would always finish on some pretty pathetic soundbite that looked good until 5 mins after when people saw the small print and relised we were actually losing out not gaining. You have to be mighty thick to repeat that trick as often as him.

    Its a shame as a Scot myself that when we did finally get someone from our country at the top of the tree it was one of the Scottish Labour mafia – they type idiots up here would vote in even if it was a Sheep with a red rossette. To think the lot they left behind are even worse!!! The SNP would have to really self destruct to let that lot back in but people still vote for them “Ive always voted Labour by ‘ra way in that!!

    • 794
      Anonymous says:

      Alex Salmond was on good form this morning. Twittering on about ringing the Queen to tell her she still had an effect government up in Scotland. Nice sop to the Unionists in Haggis Land. And he mentioned transparency in MSP expenses.

  206. 664
  207. 666
    Susan Boil says:

    yer doing a grand job Gordon

  208. 668
    Jim says:

    Will Brown go ‘all the way’ – and refuse to stop untill sectioned. And then there was Cameron – who took the Extasy bad trip (and came down). STUPID FUCKER.

  209. 672
    Anonymous says:

    Been at work work all day, anything happened?

  210. 675
    The Director of Politically Correct ‘n Convenient Troof at AlJaBeeba, the State Broadcaster, says:

    Our Beloved And Glorious Leader, Herr Comrade Kim McStalinGabe Brownstainovich is not in any sort of difficulty.


    There is no plot to remove Him.

    His Glorious Reich will continue for a thousand delirious years.

    Tractor production has reached an all time high, and our Pensions are safe, as is the TV Licence Tax if we do a good job and report that 110% of the population have voted for him and his policies – which are after all – the only ones that will work.


  211. 682
    Anonymous says:

    Some guy on Jeff Randall said that the past 12 years have been the Brown-Balls financial era. Yup that pretty much sums it up. What I believe he meant though was that Ed “So what” Balls was in on all the financial disasters including the raid on the private sector final salary pensions. Fucking magic isn’t it. The only people in this country with a decent pension are the crooked marxist politicians who robbed everyone else of theirs. Brown-Balls indeed.

    • 705
      M.T.BUCKET says:

      Looking back how did they manage to win two more elections after that, it fcuked my main pension completley.

    • 726
      Anonymous Misogynist says:

      And the waffle Brown came out with today in PMQ’s saying it was due to the current economic crisis and fall in share prices.
      He must think we’re fuckin’ stupid!

      • 738
        M.T.BUCKET says:

        B.P. are closeing their final salary scheme, they have no deficet at present but does that say something about the future.

      • 1094
        OED says:

        Brownballed – a new phrase that captures incompetence, rudeness, ignorance and vindictive back-stabbing for personal pleasure and gain. As in ” I used to have a pension, but then it was brownballed”, or ” Great Britain used to have some gold reserves, but they were brownballed”.

  212. 683
    Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

    Are you looking for some good cheap hot anal action boys? Sign up here


  213. 693

    Here’s The email that could finish Gordon off.

    We know what it looks like, but we don’t know how many will have the balls to send it.

    If you’re an MP, ans you’re hovering over the ‘Send’ button, for fucks sake click it now.

    We’re long past party political considerations now – we just need to get rid of this man before he can do any more damage.

  214. 698

    Has the post numbering gone all to cock, or have I had one too many shelebratory lagersh?

  215. 699
    Voter A says:

    an e-mail from the electorate

    Dear Gordon

    Fuck off

    The British People

    • 710
      NewGirl says:

      Ha ha ha!

    • 935
      Jim says:

      Message to british people from the Welsh: Grow the fuck up you silly british colonialist pricks.


      • 997
        Bobby says:


        TAKE IT YOU TRIBAL Hunts…



      • 1022

        Welsh people ARE British.

        • 1059
          Master Baiter says:

          a message to all the peoples of Britain from the people of Wales does not preclude the latter from being part of the former

  216. 700
    Anonymous says:

    “she had allegedly avoided paying capital gains tax on the sale of another property”

    Greedy bitch.

  217. 703
    Anonymous says:

    ” Ronnie Biggs to repay proceeds of Great Train Robbery after ‘genuine oversight’

    Notorious Great Train Robber, Ronnie Biggs, has announced that he is to return the proceeds gained from the 1963 multi-million pound train heist in an attempt to restore public confidence in the once honourable criminal classes. Biggs, currently serving a sentence in Norwich prison after returning to the UK in 2001, has described the manner by which he came into the money as ‘an honest mistake’, and has called for a change in the rules which are making morally-upright criminals look like money-grabbing cheats.

    ‘I didn’t realise I was doing anything wrong,’ said the ailing 79-year-old today in a prepared statement. ‘The train stopped and everyone just jumped on the wagon, so I assumed it was totally on the level. But I tell you, as soon as I checked the law some 36 years later and found that I may have been in the wrong, I couldn’t have been more embarrassed. I turned myself in straight away. I just hope that by giving the money back now it’s not too late to change the public’s opinion of me.’

    After initially being convicted for the Great Train Robbery in what he thought was a gross miscarriage of justice, Biggs escaped from prison in 1965 and remained on the run until he discovered his mistake in 2001. Although he insists that at the time of the robbery he stuck to the gang’s rules 100%, he has admitted that he felt ‘uncomfortable’ claiming so much money. And he has now called for a complete overhaul of the system which forced him to acquire second, third and fourth homes in different countries just to avoid being apprehended by the police and returned to prison.

    Yet despite getting his comeuppance, Biggs remains nostalgic for a time when robbers had standards. ‘There was a time when being a criminal meant something, when you were looked up to by the community,’ he lamented today. ‘But this modern generation of criminals is completely lacking in moral fibre. They’ll take anything, and it’s decent everyday people who are left to foot the bill.’

    courtesy https://nodpi.org/forum/index.php/topic,1555.msg17979/topicseen.html#msg17979

  218. 708
    James says:

    Why is Sir Peter Tapsell still an MP. His question on PMQ’s today took him about 5 minutes to get out. He is obviously unfit. Surely this guy has had his innings. He should be retired?

  219. 719
    Lofa on the sofa says:

    sky reporting they have seen copy of email by Labour MPs asking Broon to resign, will publish when they have 50 signatures.

    shouldn’t take too long

  220. 720

    What can we expect, Guido? He is, after all, only A Porter. Someone who carries things to and fro for other people…


  221. 733
    Anonymous says:

    >2,250 comments in one day!


    • 1068
      British Library Moderator says:

      Many of them will be deleted of course before they enter the National Archive.

  222. 750
    + + + NEWSFALSH !!!!! + + + says:

    To ensure fair play, a special consignment of vote counters, riggers and boxes have arrived from RhumGabeLand and N. Chorea.

    They will be distributed overnight.

    Counting will begin at 7am Thursday June 4, with results announced at 9am.

    Specially selected kids from ‘acadamies’ (sic) will count the votes on the machines the treasury use to tally the national debt an’ that, innit.

    The Glorious Leader, Herr Comrade McStalinKimGabeBrownstainovich and His buddies, will be declared elected at 10am.

    That is all. Get stuffed!

  223. 762
    Dr Feelgood says:

    Labour 3rd, risk 4th in new YouGov EURO Election poll:
    CON 26, LAB 16, LD 15, UKIP 18, GRN 10, BNP 5


    This is of definite voters. If those not sure to vote all do, then:
    CON 37, LAB 21, LD 19, UKIP 8

  224. 769
    Dr Feelgood says:

    Labour 3rd, risk 4th in new YouGov EURO Election poll:
    CON 26, LAB 16, LD 15, UKIP 18, GRN 10, Toytown Nazis 5


    This is of definite voters. If those not sure to vote all do, then:
    CON 37, LAB 21, LD 19, UKIP 8

  225. 774
    Lofa on the sofa says:

    Meanwhile over at LabourList there’s a list of what they stand for entitled;

    Here’s why were Labour

    then a list of all the shit thay really care about, followed by the line;

    For this post, no negative or distracting comments will be published. We want to know why you will continue to support Labour and why you will cast your vote tomorrow.



    • 792
      R.McGeddon says:

      I note that the Grandmaster Baiter, thickos & thieves and numerous other trolls are observing radio silence. Are they listening to the sort of music that Soviet radio stations used to play when Brown’s role models ( Andropov, Brezhnev, Stalin etc ) used to keel over or is it just way past their bedtime ?

      • 831
        Goebbels says:

        In my professional opinion it seems to be that Master Baiter is a paid propagandist – which is why he only posts during working hours – and clearly doesn’t give a shit that he turns everyone even further against their cause (if that were possible).

        The Dear Leader has probably set a norm of getting 12 positive comments for Labour on Guido’s site each day.

        Hardwidge and TaT are just random nutters.

        • 878
          thick as thieves says:

          what the fuck are you going on about?
          you are a troll I am not.
          I am independent.
          you must be new here to be ignorant of that fact.
          it is better to read first before shooting your mouth up or you end up looking like a right c’unt. just like wot you do.
          and questioning peoples mental health is so old fashioned, very new labour.
          it is far too rich coming from someone who uses a nazi pseudonym…..
          hold on….. you are nick griffing the one eyed nonce leader of the british nazi party and I demand my 5 euros!
          bye bye mr nobody.

        • 907
          gay boy the dog baiter says:

          But mr tat, you are a random nutter.

        • 933
          Anonymous Misogynist says:

          Hey Gay Boy.

          It’s Mr TwAT to you.

        • 947
          NewGirl says:

          He’ll always just be TwaT to me

        • 965
          thick as thieves says:

          we shall let the reader decide, eh rimmer.

        • 969
          NewGirl says:

          Yes good idea. Anyone?

        • 1017

          Random Nutter +1 Vote

      • 835
        Anonymous says:

        no they are awaiting new orders from ‘their master’. At this rate they may never come.

  226. 783
    Swine Flu Hits Scotland says:

    Four people suffering from swine flu are being treated in intensive care wards in hospitals in and around Glasgow tonight.


  227. 793
    Barrowboy. says:

    Twas said by The Master of the English language that the inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of blessings. The inherent virtue of Socialism is the equal sharing of miseries.

  228. 806
    R.McGeddon says:

    Rumour that Bernie Madoff has turned down Gordon Brown’s offer to become Chancellor of the Exchequer. Says he does do Ponzi schemes but not on such an epic scale.
    Also, in another surprise twist, Nick Griffin has declined the offer of Foreign Secretary.

    • 846
      Ronald McDonald says:

      The Hamburglar and I turned down the roles of Home Secetary and Health Minister.

    • 851
      Mr N.T.Christ says:

      Gordon has been on the phone asking if my friends the Four Horsemen are available to take up positions in his new cabinet. They should be in place by the weekend.

  229. 809
    Anonymous says:

    Has Hazel left because she’s embarrassed, or has she left because she didn’t want to be reshuffled – she wants to stand for the leadership?

    • 1021
      I love Hazel says:

      capital gains and 80k or something?

      Need a big cheque to pay back that shit. Maybe one of those big cardboard ones the banks give out for photo ops once in a while

      Troughing cow

  230. 810
    Dr Feelgood says:

    +++ This is dynamite if true +++

    Senior minister accuses No 10 of smearing Hazel Blears

    Blears’ allies explain that, following the Telegraph’s first expenses revelations, ministers were required to submit all their expenses-related paperwork to Sue Gray, director of the propriety and ethics team of the Cabinet Office.

    Documents relating to second home claims were to be handed in three weeks ago, with office expenditure paperwork submitted on Monday. Gray’s team has been checking to ensure there have been no violations of the ministerial code.

    But Brown’s critics believe operatives in Number 10 helped themselves to Gray’s files for the sake of a political attack. “They used something given to a civil servant in order to do in Hazel,” said one minister.

    • 825
      NewGirl says:

      Shit! He’s blackmailing them….Wonder who the senior minister is?

      • 836
        Damp Squid says:

        Well there aren’t many left to choose from

        • 848
          Dack Blog says:

          One’s on Newsnight tonight – ‘senior cabinet minister’ (so no one confirmed yet, then) – Clegg, Farage.

      • 849
        Boris says:

        I’ve been saying this for days New Girl

        The No 10 Smear Unit are actively criminal…

        • 912
          MI5 says:

          Brown has disgraced Dowing Street to the point where there is now a mountain of evidence that he has used and is using the position of Prime Minister to blackamil his own Ministers

          Not to speak of the rest of his crimes

          This Man is an active CRIMINAL…

          And if Carter Ruck or anyone else would like to issue a wrie of defamation I would happily go before any Court RIGHT NOW……….


          We will not forget you or your cronies Brown

          Until you have been condemned in a Court of Law…

  231. 816
    nell says:

    OK. Where is Prezza’s Campaign Bus?? Not seen for days even though we are on the eve of a major election. Has he retreated to the bunker with Brown??????

    What is mandy’s game?? Is he really holding up the incompetent Brown as Govt collapses around Labour’s ears?? If so —Why??

    Have Reid and Blunkett really said NO!!, tonight, to Brown’s offer of Cabinet posts in Gordon’s Govt.???

    Where is Gordon??

    Is this the end of Labour!!!???

    • 850
      Boris says:

      Mandy’s book will earn him a fortune

      How I assisted the Mad Prime Minister in his last hours etc…

      Then off to Corfu with his toy boy…!!

      • 916
        nell says:

        No!! Sorry!!

        Deripaska is benefitting from his friendship with Mandy.

        Look at Vauxhall and the jobs that Mandy has sold to Russia.!!!!!

        How much has Mandy made out of this deal ?????

        Is that why he is staying in Broon’s govt??? supporting idiot Broon when everyone else is leaving the sinking ship????

        Because he has other deals going on????

        I suspect that is so!!!!!!!!!

        • 927
          Boris says:

          Listen Nell

          Brown has been mad for years..

          He does not even understand what a conflict of interest means…

          Mandy runs cirles aroung the MadMaN…

          Mandy will make a fortune out of this “crisis”

          Deals, book contracts, invitations from all his European friends to come and describe how he fucked Britain..

          The popssibilities are endless for a corrupt traitor like him…

    • 876
      Prezza says:

      Me bus is parked up in South Mimms Services – at least until the supply of Ginsters’ pasties is gone, and the onboard chemical lav is unblocked.

      • 885
        Rt Hoonarable J. Pressclott says:

        We changed the name of our website from gofourth.co.uk
        to comeinfourth.co.uk in anticipation of our final rankings after Thursday’s elections.

        I want to connect with our voters, preferably if they’re called Tracey and go over very easily.

        • 919
          Boris says:

          Thank you my friends…

          I have just had my first Planter’s Punch

          You make my evenings…

          Your chum

          Boris (soon to be ex-Mayor of London)

  232. 832
    1000 fuck offs says:


  233. 833
  234. 837

    Breaking news: bet on when gordon brown will leave has literally just been taken down or paddypower

  235. 840
    Switched on Voter says:

    I’m beginning to think that Mr Brown may have psychological flaws.

  236. 841

    an interestingly so has ‘who will be the next labour party leader?’

  237. 842
    thriftybeatnik says:

    Oh yeah and your RSS has moved
    Old one is dead

    so you’ll need to updaye to

  238. 844
    The Beast of Clerkenwell says:

    Twats leaving a sinking shit.
    McMental you couldnt have been given a better name
    “Brown” the colour
    sof getting on with the jobbies

  239. 847
    Johnny says says:

    Does the PM have to be the leader of their Party?

    • 1024
      My Bonnie lies over the Expenses says:

      Just look at Brown he has never achieved such a thing

  240. 852
    Grateful for small mercies says:

    Life is shit, but at least i have’nt got that fat Hunt Adam Boulton standing across the street shouting “Are you gonna fuck off or what?” every time i come out my front door

  241. 854

    Sick of Brown’s recession? Well this might help ease the pain a little!
    Worried by Brown’s recession? Here are some on and offline voucher codes and discounts!

    Well, you have to try to save money somehow, don’t you?

  242. 859
    Labour 1997 says:

    Things can only get better

  243. 861
    Ratsniffer says:

    Mandy on AlBeeb tonight talking about Snottus Gobbulous: “what you saw today (in PMQs) is a man at the top of his game”

    If that’s him at the top of his game, I’d hate to see him in the gutter.

    • 870
      Heads on poles says:

      Wouldn’t you?
      I’d love to see him there.

    • 993
      English Liberation Front says:

      Scripted. The reptile Woodward said exactly the same thing.

      Oiliness, Labour and the BBC. The unholy trinity.

  244. 871
    The Brussels Octopus stalks us all says:

    Conservative Eurosceptics emphasise that they are going to keep silent until the close of the polls tomorrow at 10pm. That leaves the Cameroons a free run to have the mother of all factional fights to save the current European non-policy and Kenneth Clarke.

  245. 873
    National Socialist Plan Unveiled says:

    Gordon Brown’s much vaunted National Socialist Plan has been leaked on the internet this evening. Here it is in full:

    1) I, Gordon Brown, am the Lord your God
    2) You shall have no other gods before me
    3) You shall not make for yourself an idol
    4) You shall not make wrongful use of the name of your God
    5) Remember the Sabbath and keep them holy
    6) Honor your father and mother
    7) You shall not murder
    8) You shall not commit adultery
    9) You shall not steal
    10) You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor
    11) You shall not covet your neighbor’s wife
    12) You shall not covet anything that belongs to your neighbour
    13) You shall vote Labour
    14) Er, that’s it

    • 988
      English Liberation Front says:

      10 & 12 are a bit unlikely. The National Socialists want people spying on and stitching their neighbours up and coveting anything that belongs to anyone who earns more than they do and works for a living (which does not include local government commies, teacher commies and other assorted public sector commies).

      14 is probably “Thou shalt wear two ginormous commie chips on your shoulders”.

  246. 874
    It doesn't add up... says:

    Dead tree press version of DT has story claiming she made £80k on her property dealing before tax:


    Story not available online yet

    • 881
      It doesn't add up... says:

      She, of course, is Hazel.

      Previously DT had put her down for £45k.

  247. 879
    Agent 99 says:

    An apt time for a brief reminder just before the polls open

    Gordon Brown, financial advisor:

    Sells gold at rock bottom right before bull market

    Deliberately leaves out house prices in calculation of inflation, leading to artificially low interest rates thus spawning an unprecedented housing boom (which later crashes of course)

    Spends entire national reserves, racks up record debt

    Encourages local councils to save with Icelandic accounts which later go bust, purely based on high interest rates offered

    Run on pound against a basket of currencies, reaches below parity mark with Euro for high street exchange rates

    Encourages people to keep on spending and borrowing to invigorate the economy despite the UK already having the highest levels of personal debt in Europe.

    Recommends to Lloyds TSB (which has a reputation for being a slow and steady bank) acquisition of another bank which is subsequently shown to have losses of over £10billion

    IMF as well as the EU central bank but ignored it.

    These are the IMF warnings which give the lie to the your protestations of innocence:

    1) Dec 2003 IMF gives Brown borrowing warning

    2) Sep 2005 IMF report warning over £1 trillion mountain of debt

    3) Sep 2005 Brown besieged over growth and borrowing plans

    4) Dec 2005 IMF fires new warning over Britain’s finances

    5) Sep 2006 IMF warns over possible UK property crash

    6) Oct 2007 IMF report UK house market is ‘heading for crash’

    7) Apr 2008 IMF: UK vulnerable to US-style housing slump

    This last October, the IMF said that the UK was worst placed of all the major economies to weather the coming recession.

    • 1007

      > unprecedented housing boom

      I prefer the phrase unprecedented crash in affordability.

    • 1131
      Off to the polls says:

      hang on? I’m sure some Labour MP at PMQs asked a probing question which, by sheer coincidence, revealed that the IMF says Britain has less debt than anyone else.

  248. 883
    Sieg Heil says:

    Brown’s New Labour are nasty shits aren’t they. They couldn’t give two hoots about the country or their constituents. The only thing they care about is keeping their fuhrer Herr Braun in power.

    • 912
      Fuck you,its my career we're talking about says:

      The first two sentences, i’ll go with. But as all political commentators say, that on the eve of an election all mps toe the party line and show solidarity. However the bleatings of Smith,Blears and others show that its just me me me!

  249. 884
    Jihadi Voter says:

    Just preparing my suicide bomb vest, prior to popping down to my local polling booth first thing.

  250. 886

    [...] transparency ahead of tomorrow’s election. The list shows clearly that it is not just in the UK Parliament that elected representatives have been working hard to cover up their exorbitant expense claims. If [...]

    • 945
      just saying says:

      Have no clue who my MEP is but tomorrow I will be voting for one who is from the party that shall be nameless.

  251. 887
    Simon Wiesenthal says:

    Could someone tell me where I can find Mr. Tony Blair, Mr. Alistair campbell and Mr. Gordon Brown?

    • 1048
      Bobby says:

      In Lord Levy’s house in Hampstead probably…

      That’s where all this shit New labour Disgrace started

  252. 888
    Agent 99 says:

    Woodward just stated on Shitenight that Brown is a PM at the top of his game



    • 918
      Anonymous says:

      Brown came out with the same old bollocks at PMQ’s, do nothing Tories, getting on with the job, it’s the right thing to do etc etc, and suddenly that’s the top of his game. It is indeed laughable.

    • 961
      I'll have some of that says:

      Woodward epitomises the corruption of the body politic. A D list celeb with a good marriage (what a sad bitch his wife must be) jumping to where he thought the power lay. It must be fabulous to be so important! And what a difference he makes to so many people’s lives!

      People complain about Mandelson? Mandy’s a smooth operator – as he was tonight on AljaBeeba, who waited til the end of the 10 pm News to platform him live outside No 10. Mandy may be a crook, but he made it on his own terms, not on his missus’ chequebook. Not only that – he’s a heavy hitter.

      Woodward is scary because he doesn’t need to do this shit. But soon Mama Esther will be back to calm him down.

    • 974
      Jim says:

      Woodward – the ex Chief Inspector of Schools – who likes to date schoolsgirls. Frankly thats what 17/18 years old sixth formers are Mr Woodhead. Got away with that one didn’t the old dog? Smiled and smarmed his way through that one. Fight the power? Not those scum. Lie with the power. Cheat with the power. Fuck with the power. Abuse with the power. Create illusion with the power. Like that mentally ill Italian geezer who smiles too much. Games up now matey boy. Revolver and Whisky time. With God’s finger on the trigger. (Time lapse). Back to the start. Again. Not enough retribution. Again. And Again. For infinity. For real. Ha.

  253. 889
    Sean Woodward says:

    Hello Nige. Want another convert?

  254. 891
    Agent 99 says:

    I have heard 3 different government lackeys now state in regard to the email

    “I heard it was first a hundred then it was 50 then its a letter”

    Mandleson on BBC news now woodward on Newsnight

    this is the government damage limitation line underway along with spreading blame. They must still think we are utter loons to think they can get away with this.

    • 905
      Dr Feelgood says:

      Crick was interesting with story that Lab Chief Whip Nick Brown has named some of the plotters – Byers was one, missed the others named.

      One was not a plotter and so upset by it apparently went into an anti-No. 10 rant.

      Must have read ‘How to make enemies and alienate people’.

      • 921
        Dack Blog says:

        Stringer, Milburn, Farrelly and Allen.

      • 951
        MI5 says:

        Ah the Thug Chief Whip back in action..

        Another fucking criminal…

        “Persuading” labour backbenchers to make false expenses claims

        And he’s “naming” Labopur backbenchers now…

        And certainly criminally blackmailing them like his Mafia Boss Gordon Brown ?

        There will be a very, very bloody end to this…

        But we will get these gansters and put them in JAIL..

        There is not other place for them..

        They are destorying Britain and are CRIMINALS…

    • 917
      NewGirl says:

      that, and Hazel went for family reasons…Unbelievable. They treat us like fools. PM on top of his game today?? He didn’t answer a single question! I guess that’s what he meant. Emily was crap. Still waffling on about moats and duck houses…oh, and Nick Clegg – the door wide open? Cuz none of the Libs are troughers, natch. Bloody BBC.

      • 957
        MI5 says:

        Wind up the BBC when we get back…

        Its simple

        • 1136
          Susie says:

          And shockingly, not a single mention of the elections today on the 8′oclock News, Today programme.

          Are they keeping the elections quiet in the hope we haven’t noticed? I doubt whether they’ll even tell us the result.

  255. 893
    Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

    Sean Woodward on Newsnight. What a Hunte

  256. 895
    Piers says:

    When Susan Boyle rang Downing Street to inquire about Gordon’s state of mind, what was she told?

    • 962
      Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

      What is it with fat jocks? Are they all mentalists?

  257. 897
    Agent 99 says:

    A further reminder

    1) Tony Blair: 1997 Conference Speech
    “I want this to be the New Labour Government that ended Tory boom and bust forever.”
    2) Gordon Brown: July 1997
    “Today, the Bank of England has agreed with me that, if we are to prevent the cycle of boom and bust, inflationary pressures in the economy, which the previous Government negligently failed to tackle, must be brought under control ”
    3) Gordon Brown: November 1997
    “I am satisfied that the new monetary policy arrangements will deliver long-term price stability, and prevent a return to the cycle of boom and bust.”
    4) Gordon Brown: April 1998
    “We will not return to the stop-go, boom-bust years which we saw under the Conservatives. ”
    5) Gordon Brown: May 1998
    “The Government have put in place policies to deliver that objective and are determined to avoid a return to boom and bust.”
    6) Gordon Brown: June 1998
    “rigorous financial discipline that, together with monetary stability, ends once and for all the boom and bust that for 30 years has undermined stability ”
    7) Tony Blair: February 1999
    “Moreover, for decades we have been prone to far greater swings in the economic cycle than our continental counterparts. It has been boom and bust….Under this Government, there is an entirely new framework for economic management in place ”
    Ruth Kelly: November 1999
    “The Government have rejected the boom and bust of the Conservative party ”
    9) Tony Blair: November 1999
    “We have the best chance of ending boom and bust in years.”
    10) Gordon Brown: November 1999
    “Indeed, Britain was set to repeat the old, familiar cycle of boom and bust. Since then, we have created and rigorously adhered to a new framework of modern economic management ”
    10) Alistair Darling: January 2000
    “On top of that, we have a healthy and stable economy and an end to the boom and bust that characterised the Tory years.”
    11) Alan Johnson: February 2000
    “The Government’s first priority on coming to office was to secure long-term economic stability and put an end to the damaging cycle of boom and bust.”
    12) Gordon Brown: March 2000
    “Britain does not want a return to boom and bust. ”
    13) Tony Blair: 2000 Conference Speech
    “The first big choice: a government with the strength to deliver stability, or a government that takes the country back to boom and bust.”
    14) Gordon Brown: November 2000
    “Our approach is to reject the old vicious circle of the ’80s–rising debt, higher long-term interest rates, higher debt repayment costs, lower growth, higher unemployment, then enforced cuts in public spending. That was the old boom and bust.”
    15) Gordon Brown: March 2001
    “We will not return to boom and bust.”
    16) Ruth Kelly: May 2002
    “We must avoid a return to the days of boom and bust that manufacturers had to endure for a long time under the Conservatives.”
    17) Yvette Cooper: May 2004
    “We know that they want to turn the clock back, but it would be foolish to turn it back to a policy of boom and bust.”
    18) John Prescott : January 2005
    “Labour economic stability has replaced Tory boom and bust ”
    19) Tony Blair: 2005 Conference Speech
    “In the first two terms we corrected the weaknesses of the Tory years: boom-and-bust economics ”
    20) Alistair Darling: March 2005
    “As I said, there are two approaches—first, a strong economy, stability and helping families or, secondly, the Tory cuts, the undermining of stability, and a return to the boom and bust of the 1990s.”
    21) Gordon Brown: March 2006
    “I have said before: no return to boom and bust.”
    22) Gordon Brown: December 2006
    “Boom and bust is a term that applied to the Conservative years and two of the worst recessions in history”
    23) Gordon Brown: March 2007
    “We will not return to the old boom and bust.”
    24) Alistair Darling: June 2007
    “…acknowledges the outstanding performance of the economy under this Government with the longest unbroken economic expansion on record, in contrast to the boom and bust of the previous Government “

    • 923
      chronic says:

      No more boom and bust, now it is boom and completely bust.

    • 924
      Fuck you,its my career we're talking about says:

      What the fuck are you complaining about?
      He abolished boom and just left bust. Its called a stable economy.

    • 939
      Final Reminder says:

      Gordon, oh Gordon you’ve taken us for fools.
      You lied about Prudence and your ‘Golden Rules’.
      You plundered our pensions and decimated our savings,
      We’re fed up of listening to your ‘global’ ravings.
      Blair claimed you’re a genius; he lied to us too
      The ‘British’ economy is in deep doggy-doo.’
      No booms, no busts !’ you used to shout out.
      That was all hubris, of that there’s no doubt

      .You bang on and on about your Presbyterian daddy,
      Born a son of the manse and raised in Kircaldy.
      Now how would he regard you, with disgust or with pride ?
      Seeing you’ve got friends such as Draper and McBride ?
      You say your ‘moral compass’ does n’t point toward sleaze
      But what about Darling, McNulty,Malik,Moran, Smith and Blears ?
      Of the Top Twenty Troughing MPs, NuLabour’s got SIXTEEN !
      Your Cabinet, sir, is rotten – you’re nowt but a has-been

      .Now,if you’d like us to show a scintilla of affection,
      Screw up some courage, CALL A GENERAL ELECTION !

    • 968
      Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

      They were half right.
      They abolished Boom.

  258. 902
    Anonymous says:

    “Dear Gordon,

    Over the last 12 years in government, and before, you have made an enormous contribution to this country and to the Labour Party, and this is very widely acknowledged.

    However we are writing now because we believe that in the current political situation, you can best serve the Labour Party and the country by stepping down as party leader and prime minister, and so allowing the party to choose a new leader to take us into the next general election.



    Who the fuck is XXXX?

  259. 909
    Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

    Yawn. slapper Emily Maitlis interviewing Nigel Fararge. Same old BBC questions, BNP, expenses, blah blah blah

  260. 910
    Anonymous says:

    What an unelectable rabble. Who would want to lead this party as it disappears down the drain? The more this speculation continues, the worse it gets for them. It’s a slow-motion car crash.

    Compelling viewing, though. Popcorn, anyone?

  261. 941
    dirtyden says:

    The back bench is being led by Charles Clarke. That’s that fcuked then.

    I guess it’s down to us, then. Remember, do your duty folks.


  262. 943
    Jim says:

    Quoting myself from the Guardian blog a couple of years ago:

  263. 950
    Jim says:

    Quoting myself from the Guardian blog a couple of years or so ago in advice to Labour MP’s:

    “Do not, in any circumstances allow Gordon Brown to become MP…”


    • 960
      Jim says:

      (The occult is not on Gordon’s side it seems – nor Cameron’s, so you can wipe that smile off your face, Tory weirdo).

      • 1000
        Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

        Need a razor to cut the smile off this Tory weirdo’s face, I can tell you !

    • 986
      Jim says:

      PM I mean. I really did say that. And then there was the inaction surrounding the oitsidethebox incident of Northern Rock. A watershed happening I would suggest. Incredibly the rabbit broke out of the headlight induced trance and stopped capitalism/babylon vampire system from imploding as per biblical prophecy – and the stupid idiot thinks he was doing us all a favour?. IDIOT> Stop helping it/them!

      My goodness its quite annoying trying to type using a micro notebok. That should read book. Go and read a book. Trite. LOL. Sic.

      • 1005
        Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

        I “met” the bloke on a flight almost 20 years ago when he was shadow chancellor.
        I honestly detested the man from that day after witnessing his personality, his ego, his arrogance firsthand I then watched in facination and horror that any party would support his type never mind make him a PM.
        If I could see that in 40 minutes, why oh why couldn’t The Party see it ?
        I once told a friend that I kind of wanted him to become PM as the electorate would find him out after 6 months and kick Labour out at the first opportunity.
        (they had already won twice, looking at a third time and were invincible at the time – seems such a short time ago now, huh ?)
        I was wrong of course – it took only 3 months before he was rumbled.
        An the rest, like him, is history.

        • 1028
          Jim says:

          …a steady Eddy!

        • 1034
          Jim says:

          …but not risk adverse. Gordon likes risk! A chancer. A player. A gambler. A politition. But not good at hiding/staying inner thoughts which are an essential prerequisite for such a job. ..and of course it creates more pain and torture for Gordon to realise that ‘we’ can see into his mind in this way…the way the camera seeks out the weakness to display it as a persons entire personality is…disconcerting. Yes, all 60 million are watching you Gordon. Neighbourhood watch, travellers watch – now all watching you Gordon. …wheras Cameron the tory Hunt loves it. Cameron needs to be kiddnapped by Islamic militants and put through a real time hell/healing until the british bastard is no more sir! Then he might have something worthwhile to say. As it is he is a very dangerous tory bastard. mmm, definitly needs that puffy tory face smaking until bleeding profusely. (for real obviously, not some sort of political drubbing or anything.)

        • 1037
          Jim says:

          ..so I guess that realistically in the political game, leaves us the Greens. And what a game it is sirs! A game for winners and losers…ok, ok, no need to go over the accounts business again. Just watch that Maoist bastard, Jim Killock, for sure that boy must have some dodgy history about him. No seriously. MORE POLICE = FAILED SOCIETY. ESPECIALLY community level policing. Please understand this truth, and your own history, Green Party. We help each other – or had you forgotten Green Party? More E prescriptions methinks sirs!

        • 1118
          Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

          But .. Cameron doesn’t NEED to say anything on policy.
          Why should he ??????
          We all know what he’s going to do so why tell us in advance and open it up to allow an onslaught from the remnants of the Labour Party
          (Hint: Read “The Plan” for a rough guide to real radical politics, the real Consrcative Manifesto)
          It’s ZaNu’s election to lose – not the Tories to win.
          I suspect you’ll hear little about policy unless Zanu get to within 5% of Tories in popular polls.
          My own viw is Cameron will make an exceptional PM – because he simply HAS to be radical.
          But don’t expect NUT/Unite/BMA and the rest of the stalwarts to be happy.
          It’s going to be a whirlwind and for any PS Unions that withdraw their labour and take to the streets to support their feather-bedded employment terms and pay rises better look forward to missiles rather than words of support from the rest of the nation.
          We are in for a tough time and we are in this together.

        • 1138
          Susie says:

          I’m reading The Plan at the moment. If Cameron delivers a quarter of its sanity simplicity and good sense, life in the UK will be much improved.

          The beauty of it is, it won’t cost us a thing (unless you are one of them — a public sector CEO on £200k a year).

  264. 952
    nell says:

    I wonder what Gordon is going to think as he stands on the podium with Sarkozy, Obama , the Canadian PM, and The Prince of Wales taking the salute from the last 800 men of those brave 80,000 who stormed the Normandy beaches on D-Day.

    Not much I suspect!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Frankly this man doesn’t have much depth of thought!!!!!!!!!!!

    • 971
      I'll have some of that says:

      He’ll be thinking:



      Courage? I wrote the book!

      Now I’ll just squiggle in between Sarko and Ob for the photo op and I’ll be made up….

      Letter? “The Post Office has been stolen, and the mail box is blocked”…….

    • 1042
      A Pensioner says:

      He’ll be hoping none of them still have guns

  265. 955
    nearlyheadlessnicky says:

    Is this a FAIRY story?

  266. 964
    whatever... says:

    Ahhh! So sue me for the last post. It was meant as a reply to ‘shellingout’ at 8.41pm. Crikey. My timing is getting as bad as Gordon’s.

  267. 977
    English Liberation Front says:

    Something going on. Labour’s mouthpieces are all looking much too pleased with themselves tonight given the circumstances.

    Rigged election or intel that they are not going to do so badly?

    • 991
      Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

      Carlsberg don’t do Escape Acts … but if they did …

    • 994
      Stalemate says:

      If there is enough of a protest vote,we could be left with a hung parliament with no two parties able to cobble together a working coalition?

  268. 979
    nell says:

    These are exceptional times.

    Will Gordon be gone tomorrow???? Maybe by mid June .

    The spotlight is on Gordon’s people —TomW- DAlexander (and McBr hiding in the No.10 basement)

    Alastair why won’t you act?????? What is wrong with your backbone???????

    Where is Mandy??????

  269. 982
    NuLabour? ScruLabour says:

    We are left with a Cabinet of bedwetters: some bright and decent people among them – but where’s the backbone, where’s the beef? Their fate could be to become the third party; perhaps by as early as this weekend; perhaps never to return.

    ^ saw this in the Times and I came in my pants

  270. 985
    Babar was a very poorly baby Elephant says:

    Wed 03 June 2009.

    Been a good day. Then one thinks “tomorrow” …

    Things Can Only Get Better.

    Rejoice and Enjoy.

    • 1016
      nell says:

      Yes Babar I loved that song!!!!!!!!!!

      “Things can only get better”

      Oh well. All ‘good’ things must come to an end

      As an after thought?? Where are the Blairs and their Uddin friend now ??!!!!!!!!!

      Good night . God Bless.

  271. 986
    Anonymous says:

    I wonder if Brown will do the same thing as last time. Last time when his leadership was challenged he used his heavies to stop the ballot papers from being physically sent, and said “nobody can sign that form until you already have at least 70 people on the form that I’m not going to let you have in the first instance.”

  272. 990
    nell says:

    As Gordon would say- I put my trust in God .

    Gordon your days are numbered.

    I suspect by the end of June Gordon will be gone.

    Hopefully there will be an election by October.

    What are the betting odds of a General Election this year???

  273. 998
    mutley says:

    I am sorry Hazel left as I am very fond of nuts…

  274. 1006
    Jim says:

    ..yes, but all polititions are ‘sociopaths’ – lying criminal pyscopaths on a a society wide scale of influence/action. They lie as actors do – quite well, thus they con people…they ‘blag’ – and they are quite good at it. Of course they don’t mean what they say! The point is that you are not suppost to ‘sus’ them out, and if you do (you being the ‘general public’) then they have failed as illusionists, and must be torn apart whilst still alive by a pack of wolves. Cameron is a great magician. A chancer. A dangergous madman you would do well to lock up in small and padded room for ever. Do not let that british upper caste Hunt anywhere near your daughters nor give the beguilingly soft bodied sea creature any real power whatsoever. Hes not angry. Hes a bullshitting tory weirdo who’s forgetton what Extasy is like. Take care of that british bastard 1-2-3 lunatic. Brown never thought he’d get caught out by economic/finance implosion. He thought you were too short in memory, that you were too hooked into his babylon bad trip to realise, to recall that he boasted of successful capitalist economic alchemy solution – but his masonic breadhead challace turned sour. (obviously). A poisonous parody of poetry….In the bardic sense of creating nu realities by the process of magically empowered thought – kinda like the (continuing and eternal) act of Creation (of the universe/s). From the dreamspace sirs! Remember Cameron, you fucking weirdo.

    • 1014
      Lab Rat says:

      I think Gordons putting something in the water.

    • 1018
      Jim says:

      Yes Cameron, thats what you and your ike, your order of money and abuse, do to Tibetan Lama doing tantric Love – white skin wank at best, and at worst, so called Skitzaphrenia. I.e you do everything that you possible can sicko money poison scum head. to implode auspcious communal consciousness realisation. You’re a disrespectful Hunt Cameron. You’re a a Hunt Cameron. I would never ever ever ever ever vote for you or your party of sick old evil tory Hunts.

    • 1126
      Tattooed_Arry says:

      That was a Party Political Broadcast by The Natural Law Party.

      • 1139
        Susie says:

        Yes, They seem to have given up on their Yogic Flying agenda and are concentrating on Yogic Tourette chanting. What a shame.

  275. 1015
  276. 1020
    "Gus" O'Donnell says:

    Goodnight all. Quiet day tomorrow – until about 10.00pm of course.

    Then it’s cabinet re-shuffle time.
    Darling to stay at HMT or else he’ll scream.
    Balls to Home Sec to keep Brown happy
    Miliband to stay at FCO or else he’ll scream
    Hoon to Communities Sec (thus avoiding power vacuum and yet strangely creating a new one).
    Mandy – oh dear – he’ll scream anyway.

    Looking forward to it.

  277. 1023
    troglodyte says:

    Jack Straw at 10 to 1 at Corals looks a good bet. Might as well try to profit out of this unholy mess. Might have a saver on the postman as well.

  278. 1031
    VotR says:

    Ah so the sisterhood were forming a coup against Gordon and his male MPs and Blears resignation is part of the show.

    Admirable but their actions demonstrate feminism at its worst. Women will not be trusted in politics again, especially by male prime ministers.

  279. 1033
    Anonymous says:

    Did any one notice that Yesterday Merkel was having a right go at McFuckwit for printing money.

  280. 1036
    Anonymous says:

    I’ve just read brown’s reply back to blears’ resignation letter (sky posted a pdf copy) – I see he still uses thick black felt-tip pen and has the handwriting of a 3 year old.

    At least Blears can do joined-up writing.

  281. 1040
    Wallace says:

    “Im comin home, I’ve done my time.
    Now I’ve gotten to know what is, and isnt mine…”

  282. 1042
    aswinsterstale says:

    mp’s under pressure, are they fucking joking or what.
    been watching brown, he’s going nowhere, and he will bring his house down.
    A knight in shining armour is going to turn up and save the day (economy). I think not.
    Good bye labour, and good fucking riddance

  283. 1046
    caesars wife says:

    As the email does it circuit , fevered wavering fingers ,tap the future , will the great leader be toppled ??, is the next blow being lined up , why does alan johnson look like a man who doesnt like his future, why are so many people upset at ed balls being touted as chancellor (totally legitmate concern in CW way of thinking) .

    alas when you go abroad decisions are made and just as it happened to mrs Thatcher , gordon brown is to go to France , the theater of it , lays wreath to dead ww2 D Day landings , rushed in royal has to do duty despite browns airbrushing of history attempt , old soilders look on pondering how the country has been ruined .

    public are fed up by there troughing failed politicians and unelected leader , only real lancing of the festering boil is a general election , but gordon has this apsect if universal suffering and wants the enuchs to be sacrficed with him .state recognition for the glorius leaders running of the country ??.

    to vote labour would be an admission of not knowing any detail about what labour have done , the hard core socialists thinks gordon has somthing to offer. but the plots and lies are becomming complex now , too complex for gordons cabal to handle , more will be sacrificed as he carries on , the policies may even get more wonk , the brand “labour” will be tagged for a generation and perhaps have an historical end , like one of those old chisled staues of stalin , children will ask mommy and daddy “how did he become leader” , they will shudder and recall one of the darker times of uk hsitory.

    • 1051
      MI5 says:

      Excellent CW

      I really think they will ask mommy and daddy why..

      Funny that many of these labour gansters were commies in their youth as well?

      they continued the tradition of horror and disgrace and financial disaster…

      • 1083
        P1 says:

        After Brown goes, I think there will be a move to airbrush him from the history of PMs. He’ll probably still get his picture on the wall in No.10, but perhaps just round the corner, in the recess, where the light is not so good. His Chancellor years will be played up to make him feel better, but no-one will forget the way he trashed private pensions, sold gold at the bottom of the market (remember McMillan’s jibe about the family silver?), fiddled figures, ran up huge debt and taxed and spent, spent, spent to no avail.

        He, and Labour, will not be missed.

  284. 1047
    Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

    I can’t sleep. I keep going down to the scout hut/polling station to make sure it’s still there. In a couple of hours I’m going round town to make sure there aren’t any Vote labour yard signs, too.

  285. 1055
  286. 1061
    Anonymous says:

    I’d certainly buy shares in Nokia come later today :)

    To be fair I actually like Gordon the man, I’m afraid Gordon the politician doesn’t cut the mustard, very sad.

    PS, they always say you can tell a man by his choice of wife. Sarah Brown strikes me as a very decent person.

    • 1106
      Anonymous says:

      I agree with you that the best thing about Gordon is his better half.

  287. 1072
    End the license fee says:

    Expenses: equal treatment by BBC –


    4 Jun 2009 71% relevance
    * Conservative MPs’ expense claims

    A summary of expenses claims made by Conservative MPs over the past few years, as published by the Daily Telegraph.
    3 Jun 2009 71% relevance

    Unable of course to find same item for Labour

  288. 1074
    Doctor Mick says:

    Tis a beautiful mornin’ for a bloodbath.


    Brouhahaha, BROUHAHAHAHA!!!

  289. 1079
    BrianSJ says:

    Home Secretary job now on eBay.

  290. 1080
    nell says:

    Lovely morning.

    See the papers are suggesting Alastair Darling may walk if GB tries to move him. I wonder about dear little Mr Millitwit – if he will do the same.

    CarolineF on the other hand is said to be ‘holding out for promotion’. I wonder if that’s Downing St briefing her against in the hope of getting rid of her.

    Oh and it’s polling day. Another interesting day!!!1 Morning folks.

  291. 1081
    Rocking The Horse says:

    Was Hazels badge a coded Rocking Horse dig at Brown?

  292. 1084
    South East Voter says:

    Sorry a bit off topic.
    Should I vote for Dan Hannan, or Vote UKIP to push Labour in to 4th Place to help get rid of Gordon?

    • 1090
      Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

      I am voting UKIP ‘cos I don’t trust the Tories on europe. ‘Respect Hannan but he’s not the present chief. Cameron is, who I have no regard for. IMO.

      • 1091
        Sir Robin Knest-Magpie says:

        P.S; I meant to answer your question as hopefully there are others who are like me including Tebbit, Kalms, Heffer, etc, etc..

        • 1105
          Moley says:

          Hannan said in his Blog that he didn’t know why he bothered to campaign because the voting system guarantees him in whatever.

        • 1125
          British Library Moderator says:

          What has happened to the numbering system and why do people insist on the use of dubiose language?

        • 1129
          The MacSnotty tragedy says:

          Is that librarian-speak?

  293. 1085
    The Beast of Clerkenwell says:

    “shits leaving a sinking rat”
    I come up with those and you Hoons get it for free
    I’m seriously thinking of storming the office of Mr Fawkes and demanding cold hard cash

  294. 1088
    Our Astrological Correspondent says:

    A real humdinger of a full moon coming up this weekend!

  295. 1089
    Gordon's Message To The Labour Party says:

    Fancy a dirky weekend then? I’m up for it.

  296. 1093
    Cassandra King says:

    The premier lunatic prime mentalist loony in chief Gordon McMental is praying for a low turnout today, he is planning to justify his maniacal cinging onto power by saying that most people are concerned with the economic disaster gripping the UK and that because most people didnt vote he takes that as a sign that people want him to lead them through the difficult times ahead!

    • 1096
      M.T.BUCKET says:

      We will have to scupper his little game then, it’s a nice day to vote here in the south. Morning all.

      • 1099
        Amateur Psephologist says:

        Yes a low vote for Labour and a high turnout will look even worse for them.

      • 1110
        DisgustedOfMitcham2 says:

        Absolutely. I’ve voted, and I didn’t vote Labour. I’m looking forward to the results.

  297. 1097
    Media Watch says:

    Martial [?] Music on Radio 3. Has Brown “resigned”?

    Oh no – it’s just a normal Radio 3 broadcast

  298. 1101
    Erasmus - Updated says:

    In the land of David Blunkett, Gordon Brown is prime minister

  299. 1102
    Anonymous says:

    The final, final, final “Downfall” spoof promises to be superb, with a bit of luck.

  300. 1104
    nell says:

    John Reid issued statement this morning saying categorically he is not returning to cabinet. One more Gordon can’t count on.

    At this rate he’ll be having to offer the vacant cabinet posts to his cleaning ladies.

    • 1124
      nell says:

      David Blunkett has now also said he is not returning to cabinet.

      Wonder if Gordon will be forced to appeal to Charles Clarke – now that would be funny !!!!

      Except I suspect that Charles has probably got his name on that email that’s circulating.

      Oh well better go and do some work.

  301. 1108
    finger of fudge says:

    why should Labour bother about coming last in the polls? Brown has no respect for democracy

    Brown is a dictator he will be getting on with the job regardless

  302. 1109
    Anonymous says:

    Reid was enough second-raters on his staff right now.
    Goodness knows why Brown would think he’s need another parasite ?

  303. 1111
    Anonymous says:

    My mum used to tell me “A madman thinks everyone is mad but himself”
    She didn’t even know Mad Jock McMental.

  304. 1114
    Tin Cunliffe says:

    Nothing interesting happening today then?

  305. 1115
    Anonymous says:

    It is all a stage act. We had the promise of Brown, for all the Blair years, to keep voters loyal. Now we have the idea of Brown going to keep the voters from complete desertion. It is the light at the end of the tunnel policy.

    There is no way that Labour will crash and burn, they are paying bribes to the majority of households, who know the bribes will have to disappear if Labour is crushed.

    Just look what happens when you stop a gravy train (MP’s expenses): they all move on to the next provider. The debt society is exactly what is going to maintain them.

  306. 1116
    Odds Bodkins says:

    Gordon Please Go petition nearing 65K.

  307. 1120
  308. 1122
  309. 1127
    michael says:

    sod trying to get 70 gutless labour m.p.s.to sign an email…as of ten thirty today,(thursday 4th.june)64,935 voters have signed the petition for brown to go, its on the number 10 website.
    please add your name today,after you have been out to vote,michael.

  310. 1137
    Porky Pies MP says:

    The ginger minger strikes again.

  311. 1140
    Susie says:

    Off to vote now… Conservative x 2. Want a nice hefty percentage for the Euros (PR) to get Gor/balls to piss off.

  312. 1142
    Anonymous says:

    Hazel the Ginger Fraudster (to the tune of Puff the Magic Dragon)

    Hazel the ginger fraudster lived a life of ease
    and flicked between three properties paid for by you and me
    All the tabloid papers loved that rascal Hazel
    As she bought TVs and furniture and all that she was able

    Hazel the ginger fraudster lived a life of ease
    and flicked between three properties paid for by you and me
    Hazel the ginger fraudster lived a life of ease
    and flicked between three properties paid for by you and me

    In Europe she would travel, her life a fairy tale
    as she lied to con the tax man out of tax from her house sale
    No Youtube, she insisted knock on doors – That’s my game
    And ministers would turn blind eyes when Hazel made her claims

    Hazel the ginger fraudster lived…

    Receipts they live for ever, but not so ministers
    Commons seats and cabinet posts go to those who most deserve
    One grey night it happened; the papers told the hordes
    and Hazel the twisted minister had to cease her scandalous fraud

    Hazel the ginger fraudster lived…

    Her head was bent in sorrow, she tried to shift the blame
    Hazel no longer commanded trust and failed to clear her name
    Without the public’s trust, and support she needed most
    Hazel that twisted minister resigned her cabinet post

    Hazel the ginger fraudster lived…

  313. 1144
    Mrs Sandra Lindop says:

    3rd June, our 48th Wedding Anniversary – What a Gift! Poo Gordaon could really implode – it could not happen to a ‘nicer’ bloke!! I really, really hope that this could mean a General Election early October. We need a change – yawn – we are so over-goverend it’s time we got some sense into the whole situation. I hope that Mr Cameron is up to the job because whoever takes over has a plateful of problems. I wish I could help personally. I would be a pleasure!

  314. 79
    Master Baiter says:

    Put ‘em up, go on put ‘em up. Yah you pussy.

  315. 103
    McGroom says:

    This wanker is clearly a dead red dolly/damo media hed who thinks Gordo can clean up the augean mess created by “the government of all the talents”

  316. 187
    Reichsminister Balls says:

    Baiter dear, have you been issued with your cyanide pill yet? They must never take us alive!

    And don’t forget to pop down to the Dear Leader’s quarters tomorrow evening – he wants all of his loyal comrades to witness his wedding to his one true love (the rocking horse) before the end comes.

  317. 400
    Canary Wharf Rat says:

    My Mum loves your posts, don’t do a charles whatever you do, she needs a laugh now and then!!

  318. 976
    Reg511 says:

    New Definition; Countryside, te killing of Master Baiter.

  319. 136
    Dogsbollocks says:

    Calls peple a pussy eh obviously never been near one !

  320. 229
    michel de montaigne says:

    talents or talons ?

  321. P.Handlesman says:

    You rang ? (again)

  322. Master Baiter says:

    Yes I have, I put my finger up my mum’s cat’s bum once. Delicious!

  323. Mark Oaten says:

    I could be interested in arranging a meeting.

  324. Dr Nuts says:

    It’s time you took your medications.

    No, seriously, it’s time you took your medications!

  325. Farmer Nick Brown MP The Whip says:

    With me?

  326. Chewbacca's Hairy Ring says:

    So could I

  327. The Master says:

    Badgers on Clapham Common, midnight

  328. 387
    Hermann Fegelein..Im off says:

    ….and before Frau Go Balls kills off all the kids.

  329. Anonymous says:

    Herr Fegelein just cos you were Adolf’s brother-in-law didn’t save you did it and it won’t save the Balls either being closely asssociated with the wreck of the Hesperus that Brown’s Premiership is fast becoming by the minute. Better to work out an exit strategy for Monday – Ed

  330. alfonso de gonzo says:

    sky news, i said, get on that ruddy sky thingy NOW!!!!

    Hotmail letter shox!!!

  331. alfonso de gonzo says:

    the address is signonnow@hotmail.com

  332. Anonymous says:

    - Labour are playing an interesting game as there is a rumour that the Labour whips have circulated the Gordon Resign now email to smoke out the Rebels! Those who have signed it will look chumps!

    Just think how he could find a reason to desect them and the golden goodbye they would loose! Gordon is a sly bugger! All about the money!

    All about control of the PLP!

  333. Dick Scratcher says:

    it’s .co.uk NOT .com

  334. Call me Infidel says:

    I think you give them too much credit. If (and I think it unlikely) the whips were behind this. It could blow up in their faces when they realise just how little support comrade Brownstainovich really has. In any case do they lose the golden goodbye if deselected? I would have thought it was part of their severence package and “all within the rules.” Being deselected means they don’t get a space at the trough anymore but they would still get the payoff.

  335. Anonymous says:

    First John Reid turned down Brown’s offer of the Home Secretary job and this evening David Blunkett has also turned him down.

    The shits have left the sinking rat.

  336. Anonymous says:

    I can concur. The whips power has gone. What can threaten an MP with now? De-slection? Withdrawing the whip? I think most would be glad to have the whip withdrawn. In fact distancing yourself from the parliamentary party might be a life line.

    Where did Liebour dig up their culture sectary?

  337. Tattooed_Arry says:

    Now it is, I have an earlier account which is still .com.
    My more recent accounts are .co.uk

  338. Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

    You’re right. So if you’re after cheap hot good anal action.


  339. shellingout says:

    I wonder if he’ll call an election – then none of them can succeed him.

  340. anonymous says:

    “The shits have left the sinking rat.” classic line.

  341. chut ney says:


  342. Lofa on the sofa says:

    now there’s a thought

  343. whatever... says:

    I think Gordon Brown has a scorched earth policy. He would rather call an election (if he gets the chance) than be ousted by his own party, and he hates the English. I’ve believed that since last year. Maybe, I should have believed it earlier. Hey ho. Better late than never. He’s a loon. That’s why I think Peter Mandelson is the right man to get rid of him. Getting rid of a PM is difficult, and requires great political skill…even if we in civvy street are shocked by political machinations.

  344. Give me 650 Lamp Posts and a role of piano wire and I can fix democracy says:

    Brown has admitted he hates the English, in particular the middle class English. Charlie Wheelan said that years ago when he was working at 5 Live if I remember.

    like I say McTwat should be sent back to Scotland just like William Wallace was, no balls and no fucking head.

  345. whatever... says:

    No doubt, you write what you know to be correct, but even so, it’s quite a shock to non-combatants when we realise that Gordon Brown is a sociopath, and his hatred is directed at the ‘hard working families’ he claims to protect. Reality: he only protects himself. Sociopath; a wolf in sheep’s clothing. Horrible.

  346. Anonymous says:

    I don’t think he just hates the english.

    I think he simply hates the human race because he’s not part of it. That’s why he’s intentionally destroyed the uk economy and done everything he can to try and convince other countries to follow his mad plans in their own countries.

    I think he just wants all humans to die a horrible, oppressed, slow, painful death.

    He’s a sick fuck, and he’s most definitely not human.

  347. Anonymous says:

    I hate the morris dancers too-they have NO BALLSat all!

  348. Projection is one of the core symptoms of the mental illness know as socialism.

    The other symptoms are Envy and Narcissism.

  349. Mercian says:

    I think he’s sicker than that. He hates the human race because he IS part of it, and he hates himself so much.

  350. Anonymous says:

    If you are deluded you KNOW you are right! It’s a fixed irrational belief held in tthe face of all the evidence to the contrary. Gordon’s attitude is probably-”I’m alright, it’s the other buggers”.

  351. Gordons Id says:

    Why can’t you sick fucks realise that Gordon, and only Gordon, is right?

  352. Anonymous says:

    Iain Dale has new slant on the Brown/Reid interview that took place yesterday when Brown offered the Home Office to Reid who turned it down and allegedly told Brown that for the sake of the party and country he had to resign !

    Brown merely said no doubt ” John – I am g.g.g.g.g.g…getting on with the job – it is THE right thing to do. Only I can steer the country through this crisis and the British People expect me to be focussed on that. I know what the British people want. Not you.It’s not my fault.It LL started in America. I could have got the Queen an invite you know…………….. ”

    Nurse increase the dose immediately will you……….??

    I know Reid has a reputation as a “hard man” but that’s just plain suicidal. Reports that the “good doctor” had to remove a nokia from his forehead before leaving are grossly exaggerated

  353. 1112
    Master Baiter says:

    How bizzarre.

    You’re definitely very new.

  354. Dick emery's Cock says:

    Is that code for undisclosed activities?

  355. 1121
    Master Baiter says:

    Nick Brown is quoted as being the excrement kicker, therefore Cameron was the kicked in chief.
    That’s all.

  356. Anonymous says:

    Please bring back Spitting images, that story, if only it was totaly true, would be a classic.
    can’t help laughing at the thought, priceless!!

    P.S. What model Nokia?? Was the camera running…. Hope it had sharp corners.

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Guido-hot-button (1) Guido-hot-button (1)

Rod Liddle on the loony UN sexism special rapporteur:

“There is more sexism in Britain than in any other country in the world, according to a mad woman who has been sent here by the United Nations.

Rashida Manjoo is a part-time professor of law at Cape Town University in the totally non-sexist country of South Africa (otherwise known as Rape Capital Of The World).

Mrs Magoo has been wandering around with her notebook and is appalled by the sexist “boys’ club” culture here, apparently.

I don’t doubt we still have sexism in the UK. But is it worse than in, say, Saudi Arabia, d’you think, honey-lamb? Or about 175 other countries? Get a grip, you doolally old bat.”

orkneylad says:

What’s he been doing FFS, mining bitcoins?

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