Mephedrone: Dealing with the Facts – ASI blog
Deficit in a Spin – City Unslicker
I Was BNP Bigot Until I Fell for My Jamaican Colleague – Mirror
Conservatives Baffled by Letwin’s Policy Pyramid – Times
Piers Morgan is a Tory – Fraser Nelson
The Bunker Bod Funded Entirely by Unite – Standard
Welcome to the e-Election – John Harris
Mad Nad: Declaring War on Scantily Clad Women - Devil’s Kitchen
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Nick Clegg said…
“Charlie Whelan and Lord Ashcroft are exactly the same. One is the baron of the trade unions, and the other one is the baron of Belize. Both are bankrolling political parties, both are trying to buy seats.”
+ Crude (June)
As of 16 Mar 2010
-Gilts (Mar)
As of 26 Feb 2010
Flat – No Positions
As of 23 Feb 2010 +30.81%
First = Dumbfucksgate
Sorry-its-all-been-a-terrible-mistakegate
Guido, surely only one thing for it…..
The Re-moat Parliament
Bunch of thieving, self-regarding, self-pitying Hoons who should be strung up from the nearest lamp post ~ GATE
The Dry Rot Parliament.
Got to be the best example of the excess: Tens of thousands of pounds, not in Westminster, not in her constituency and not her residence until a couple of days before the dry rot treatment.
I’m sure all the lefties would like to refer to the moat surrounding an MP’s house in his constituency, but this one trumps it on cost, location and lack of permanence.
Flipgate?
WASTEMINSTER
Profli-gate copyrighted on Anna R’s site a week ago……..
Too late, Too late, Too late……..
‘Moatsandbeamsgate’ – covers both parties and reminds us of the most ridiculous claims.
“Snoutgate” does not do it. How about “Thieving Statist Moneygrubbers”?
TRUFFLEGATE
The last goodbuy.
Exit Gate
It’s the system’s fault -gate
systemgate
flippergate
The end of Brown gate
But it is not going to be the end of Brown gate. That slimy fucker and his party have abolished shame and made snouting the trough a right, not a privelige. The weird fucker will only go if the Queen tells him to do one and that isn’t going to happen. So… We’re all fucked for another twelve months and like it or not there isn’t a fucking thing we can do about it except march on Westminster with flaming torches. Any takers? No I thought not.
V for Vendetta. It’s not a film, it’s an instruction manual.
So lets call it Screwed Up The Back Gate For Another Twelve Months Gate.
All-within-the-rules-gate?
Bunch-of-thieving-Hoons-gate
I’ve been going with the word TROUGHLIGATE and it even has it’s own bona fide definition!
Oops, sorry.
The correct link is TROUGHLIGATE.
Armageddon rich seems appropriate- Royston
I still think Troughalypse is best, but maybe someone else’s “The Re-Mote Parliament” just trumps it.
‘Poli-Kristalnacht’
After all there has been one window put in already – maybe more to come…
The ‘Speaker’s Day Massacre’ is a possible – a nod to gangsters being sorted.
The Ides of April’
The ‘Night of the Wrong Claims’
Failing that how about “Tony & Gordon’s Crowning Achievement”
Surely it all started as Speakersgate – Jimmy?
Guttergate.
We only need one ‘gate’ to describe this treason – TraitorsGate
Heads on spikes always worked the last time we had to get rid of a corrupt Speaker.
dirty stinking lowlife scumsucking thieving conning embezeling pondlife trousering trougher gate
WASTEMINSTER LOOKS GOOD WITH HINDSIGHT
WASTEMINCESTIR INQKLUDES THE HANDYCANDYMANDYDATE WITHOWT A DEMOCRATIQK MANDYD8*
THIS IS FOR THE KLAOUWNS IN THE ROOSTING HAOUSE
HERE IS YOUR THREE LINE E~WIP STARTER FOR 10
*
FAT BOY TEDDY,
THE HAMPSTEAD HAM,
ALSO KNOWN AS SIDCUP MAN
free baseball bat’s for all gate vist your mp’s surgery and make sure he fucking needs surgery when you leave gate
how about GALLOWSGATE we need a military coup gate
NICK BROWN £18,800 on food he must have been paying for his homeless rentboys with bags of food
Firstgate?
Swine fever.
SWINEGATE
48 beat you
The Great Swine Robbery.
Swine Fivers
Dripgate!
Second fuckersgate
oinkgate or oiksgate
Aporkalypse Now.
Love it!
Gets my Vote!
Best so far.
The Dishonourable Members Totally Unacceptable Caught With Their Snouts In The Trough The Bastards And Should Be Shot Or Hung Expenses Gate
The word is “hanged”
Neck or genitals?
not in scotland
If we had not gone “into Europe”, would all this expenses nonsense ever have got so bad?
I think the WestMonster-bastards have “learned the wrong sort of lesson” from nasty continental Eurpoean autarkic politicians inside the EU, whose despising pose towards electorates, and whose cavalier but ferociously acquisitive attitude to what they see as the perquisites of power, may have infected our Enemy Class.
The sooner we either_
(1) Expel the EU from the UK, or
(2) cause England to leave the UK, (the Scotch and Welsh will want to stay in or they will die of starvation freezing in the dark)
the better. I think actually we might tell the scotch to go now, don’t you? They can take the Forth-Clyde-Fascist-Mafia with them while they are at it.
Oh, also, I’d _/give/_ them “The Oil”, or the revenues therefrom as it would turn out to be, and tell them to get on with it. if they charge too much, BP etc will close up and ship out. If they charge less, they will get more oil and more revenue…..
Teach the buggers a lesson in liberalism and economics it so will. then we don’t need all there “Gates”. Ever.
alternatively known as PIGSGATE but this could be used for the MET :0)
Piss-gate?
Grand Theft Politico.
Swillgate!
9th!
They laughed when we said we wanted to be comedians. Well, they’re not laughing now.
Bistogate
Sage stuffing gate
Pigmegate, Profitmegate, Commonscon.dotcom.
‘Hamscam’ or ‘Hamscan – ID’d’ – sorry if anyone has done these yet.
Why not call it for what it is, A Great British Larceny or the rise and fall of the kleptrocracy or if you need a ….gate, rulesgate. Not forgetting of course Robber Barronsgate.
Just call it the Rotten Parliament
Soon to be the Hung Parliament.
Hanged Parliament would be better to watch on the tellybox
Farmgate
Some are more equal or corrupt than others usually having the letters MP attached.
Snoughts in the trough.
Commons-gate
The Peculation Sensation?
By the by, your fetus lovin’ hero is squirming with the best of them: http://blog.dorries.org/Blogs/2009/May/15#15
I love the way she reckons the expenses she tried to claim were okay because they were rejected -she thinks. I REALLY love the way she doesn’t have a second home and so somehow suggests the world is her second home so it’s quite reasonable that she claims a second home allowance. I’ve thought she was a space cadet for years so it makes sense to me.
You sure Cherie didn’t wtite this, funny how professional women always claim everything in my favour is against me, whenever they fuck up. Fucking hard life someone made her work in parliament. Cheeky b*tch
I really, REALLY love that she (or possibly her PA, who is apparently blame for all of her boneheadery) went back and edited out some of the rantier bits and capitals from the blog post (luckily only after the Telegraph published the original for posterity, in all its insanely over-defensive, illiterate glory), and still managed to leave ‘immediately’ spelt ‘IMMEDIATLEY’.
Calling this woman a cheeky b!tch is insulting the intelligences of cheeky b!tches everywhere.
“Greedgate”
shut the fucking gate
Troughgate of the Pork Parliament.
Rip van Winkle Gate:
The public wakes up a little!
Within-the-rules-gate
Free the English….
Bliarsgate
Traitors gate
142 brilliant
My choice too!
142 has it. Even better than mine.
142!
142
142 has my vote…
How about Flippergate?
hmm — snappy , sounds good.
The Troughalypse, is the winner it’s pure class, laugh out loud reading that gem. Another reason I like it is cause it hasn’t got gate, this gate term is getting very old.
How about Troughageddon?
36
Troughageddon,
Sounds like a good title for Brown when he is an ex-primeminister.
LORD SNOTTER of TROUGHAGEDDON
… or even just Flipgate?
thats the winner
Squealygate , the’re squealing like stuck pigs. Real pigs are lovely creatures, but not
that type!
Mortgage-gate.
Porkfest
Downfall.
a preview from a lucky hit on utube.
Within the rules gate
prisongate
Snoutgate or fiddlegate or perhaps Wisteriadiddle
The Fiddler`s Ball
The fiddler balls.
Thank god that odious Malik is suspended and hopefully being deselected & run out of Dewsbury (parachuted in by the labour party).
The arrogance of this muppett on Sky yesterday trying to brazen this out was unbelievable. Crying later when his claims into a monster tv, sound system and dodgy rent meant that not even Brown could stomach the cretin for a moment longer. Not such a big man now are you.
This dullard was arrested during the Burnley race riots and then whinged all over the place. Searched at Dulles airport and then said he was singled out because of racism. Sorry muppett you were searched and checked just like the rest of us. Nothing else, you are simply not special.
He said on Radio 4 that he earned more before he entered parliament. He’s such a talent he’s bound to be alright. We’re doing him a favour letting him go.
He can go back to Quangoland then.
Malik doesn’t get it at all. Apart from the social engineering Stazi’s who believe in wealth redistribution most of us don’t begrudge anyone earning a decent wage for working hard. It the freeloaders screwing over the taxpayer that pisses us off.
I’m afaid his local party has given him 100% support
FFS
If this islamuppet wants Sharia Law introduced in this country, perhaps he should put himself forward so we can see how it deals with thieves.
Do you think he believes that? no chance he is a grifter putting on a show to pocket the readdies that our politically correct socialist masters are giving away to such people…
As a quick reminder of who we’re talking about, here’s the YouTube clip of this gentleman wishing for a 100% Muslim parliament and a Muslim prime minister within 30 years.
The justice Ministry – sounds Kafkaesque doesn’t it? Now it is a proven fact, and it’s
head is a stranger from the truth as well, – to put it mildly!
Cheatgate
Wisnaeme-gate
GAMESUPGATE!
C**tgate
animal farm gate
slaughterthepigsgate
Profligate
Damn, I wish I’d thought of that! ;-)
Winner.
Yes – this is the one.
no wonder MFI went bust £1495 for a chest of drawers gate
WINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Profligate – yes!
But I smiled at Aporkalypse now (4) too.
Sounds too much like the word and wouldn’t run well in a sentence.
You, Sir, are a Mirthless Pedant
Top Drawer. Well done!
troughligate is better
ROTFL – brilliant
That Peter Mandleson does not have the right letters in his name the rotten barsteward!
Neat! Profiligate! :D
Flippergate
Traitorsgate
Troughergate
Gravygate
Taking-The-Absolute-Mick-Gate
Sleazegate
Within-The-Rules-Gate
Speakersgate
Ed-Balls-Gate
Browngate
Oh, I could go on! :-)
i like gravygate. does what it says.
Trough-gate
Fraud-gate
Expense-gate
Greed-gate
Or you could look to the future and look to reducing Government
Bloat-gate
Revenge of the proles.
Swinegate
Swine Coup (like Swine flu)
Porking Parliamentarian Purge (P3 instead of G3)
What de problem ?
It GOOD gumment.
Dey should all be congatulated for dere enterprise.
I will employ de Chayter as mah chancellor of de exchekker, what a good thief he is, and dis Malik chappie de right cullah too.
I will employ all dese clever crooks, I want de Government of all de Talents
The Big Plug of 2009.
Purge the swine in 2009
I like that. It’d be great on a T-shirt.
Buggerme-didIreally-claim-thatgate?
Give us a fuckin’ general election-gate
Her Majesty The Queen,
Buckingham Palace,
London,
SW1A 1AA.
Friday 15th May 2009
Your Majesty,
As a loyal subject and patriot, I am seriously concerned about the House of
Commons, in relation to the scandal over Members of Parliament and their expenses. This has caused great upset and our democracy is in danger.
I am of the view that the Country needs a Parliament with a new mandate from your people.
May I respectfully request that you speak to the Prime Minister and suggest to him that because of the level of disgust within the Country, over the issue of expenses which involves all political parties, that Parliament should be dissolved and a general election called.
Yours sincerely.
He’ll just claim travelling expenses for going to see her.
Free the English, M’am ….
god save the queen and her bolshevik regime
To be fair, all of the expenses claims combined could be paid by recovering Goodwins pension.
Approved by the government gate
Or by recovering the MP’s pensions. If you want to punish Goodwin for his sins then go after Goodwin’s pension. If you want to punish the MPs for their sins then go after their pensions.
Harold Shipman topped himself before they could remove his pension so that his missus would still receive her cut. I can’t say I’d lose a wink of sleep if any of these fiddling MP’s took the same exit strategy.
Shipman couldn’t give a shit about his wife, nor anyone else. He topped himself because he knew what would happen to him when he went to prison
profligate
Gordon doesn’t understand You Tube, but there are plenty of satirical remakes of downfall. Is Ed Balls Goering?
Manuregate
Hey Guido, How about publishing the names of MP’s that have not been bending the rules?
I really can’t believe they are all “at it”.
For example Kate Hoey
Oborne, in today’s Mail actually manages to identify about half-a-dozen apparently honest MPs.
Out of 646.
Does this country have a hope?
troughligate
This is the winner.
Captures both the clever word play of “Profligate” and the greedy troughing pigs that MPs are
I’ve been going with Troughligate, I thought it was perfect.
Check out THE DEFINITION
The Troughocaust.
or profligate
Hello, Is that the fees office, can I claim for palacegates?
westminster palace gate
I notice Balls & Cooper still aren’t mentioned on the BBC website.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk_politics/8039273.stm
Is there some deal done?
Don’t miss tomorrow’s Telegraph.
drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip… drip…
That drip is getting worse
Better call in a plumber about that drip…don’t worry, you can put the cost down on expenses…
head of the bbc is a member of labourgate,card carrier. all stitched up.
Relaxedaboutthisgate (Tam Dalziel)
PIG ROAST
Stinkbums.
Traitors gate
stick-fingers gate
I’m all right mate gate
marmite gate (they either fiddle or don’t, none in between)
pick-your-pocket gate
second rate gate
fill your boots gate
I’m trying to get more from the system than Jack-boots Jacqui
We’re worth jackshit morally, but got loads of your money gate
call an election gate.
masterbate gate – wankers
24carot gate
Traitorsgate?
RIVERSIDE GATE M8*
Kleptomaniagate
Help Oneselfgate
Chiselgate
House of Common Crooks
“SO WHAT” GATE
Hoongate.
OT Has anyone else noticed the lack of DWP “we’re targeting benefit thieves” adverts of TV and Radio recently? I wonder why. Overload perhaps?
Good observation.
Where on earth do you go to buy an £18K bookcase or a £8K television?
Kauffman and a rug – was it for his head?
I can sell any number of these on that there ebay.
Anyone remember when Chancellor Brown launched attack after attack on ‘the black economy’? – No more loopholes; no more cash-in-hand work, no more ‘cheaper if you don’t neeed a VAT receipt’; full tax to be paid on everything; the people must not be cheated out of their tax money.
Obviously none of that could reasonably have been thought to apply to MPs.
This dont apply to the crime syndicate who are looting our country. The police still dont know what to do about this organised crime and have decided to carry on with real police work – targeting the fucking motorist.
“NIGHT OF THE WRONG LIVES”?
Iwanttoknowwhosgotthefilmrightsgate?
Given everything people have been claiming for, the one thing I haven’t noticed yet is a “garden-gate”.
Or how about expur-gate, fusti-gate or proro-gate…:)
‘Sorry’gate
GREEDFEST-gate 2009
There’ll be another one in 2010 for sure
‘Profligate’
Delicious isn’t it: IT COULD BE YOU – MCNULTY, BLEARS, SMITH & THE MACKAYS IN THE FRAME.
and from last nigth’s HIGNFY: HOUSE OF COMMON CRIMINALS.
Pork-Pie-Gate?
Please! No references to pigs in any way, shape or form.
Pigs are intelligent, useful and honest animals whose existence on this plant should not be impugned by linking them in any way with the thieving, self-serving, dishonourable and thoroughly disreputable bunch of free-loading bastards in Westminster.
Scallywag has it right – pigs are clean, intelligent and companiable creatures unlike those MPs waiting investigation by Mr Plod.
Oigs also taste good. Although perhaps a few of thes MPs would taste okay, stufed as they are with garlic, truffles and caviar and their flesh tenderised over the years by alcohol and their muscles tender due to lack of exercise.
They’d be like Kobe politicians. Nicely marbled and tender as fuck. I say hang ‘em and eat ‘em.
SO WHAT gate
It’s the last chance saloon gate
Oink gate
flaming liberties gate
Averice gate
shameless gate
Pigging Hell
“Fiddlers on the hoof”
“Parasites Found”
“Night of the wrong lives”
“An MP (a thief), his wife and their troughing”
“An MP (a thief), his wife and their troughing”
Good one
M O A T G A T E The thinking being a ‘moat’ is a defensive dirty water ditch, they were defensive trying to protect their scams by rejecting Freedom of Information requests. Dirty water also being appropriate. On twitter use the hashtag #MPSCANDAL
For a bit of fun, considring that some 600 MP’s may have to give back the £250 and GO TO JAIL we need an alternative Parliament, here are some suggestions from the Twitterati…..
@JULIANBRAY Ken Dodd should be adviser to mp’s on tax affairs – he invented self-assessment!
Noot54, about 21 minutes ago
@MoragIrving @Julianbray Elton John for Housing! #mpscandal
Noot54, about 7 hours ago
@JULIANBRAY Graham Norton for culture minister
markhillary, about 7 hours ago
@Noot54 @Julianbray – Lisa Tarbuck for health!!
MoragIrving, about 8 hours ago
@JULIANBRAY Clarkson for transport minister??
bevashwell, about 8 hours ago
@JULIANBRAY How about Julian Clairy for MOD?
Noot54, about 8 hours ago
@JULIANBRAY you couldn’t do a worse job, that’s for sure!
Luggy7, about 8 hours ago
@JULIANBRAY ha ha. Shalid Malik is really a magician His trademark illusion is called ‘The Cardboard Box’. Does he turn it into a penthouse at taxpayers expense?
solarpilchard, about 8 hours ago
@JULIANBRAY if advice needed re jobsearch, they can call me. In return, maybe they can tell me how to get Job Centre to pay for dog food?
Noot54, about 8 hours ago
Eddie Izzard for First Sea Lord
“Dirty Water” is a trademarked name of Dirty Water Records so think again.
fecfoundoutgate
It-started-in-America-gate
nothin’ to do with us
No references to pigs in any way, shape or form.
Pigs are intelligent, useful and honest animals whose existence on this plant should not be impugned by linking them in any way with the thieving, self-serving, dishonourable and thoroughly disreputable bunch of free-loading bastards in Westminster.
Pigs also taste good. So perhaps a few of these MPs would taste okay, stuffed as they are with garlic, truffles and caviar and their flesh tenderised over the years by alcohol and their muscles supremely relaxed due to lack of exercise.
They’d be like Kobe politicians. Nicely marbled and tender as fuck. I say hang ‘em and eat ‘em.
extermingate
“24/7″
……….a bit like “9/11″ or “7/7″- but it represents the round the clock effort MP’s were willing to charge their every expenditure to the taxpayer.
Prison-gate?
Browntrousergate.
Just heard that tosser Tam Dalzell on Toady, justifying his purchase of bookcases.
A career of such distinction would be served adequately by IKEA.
Yes,
What a pratt he is
” I am quite relaxed about this claim”
£8000 he was granted ffs!!
I had many books and things to move and store- he then quoted his many copies of Hansards- and wanted (I forget the exact words) some thing to store them on.”
Tosser!!
I think the best is the post above ( can’t find the number now) suggesting:-
“THE ROTTEN PARLIAMENT”.
It’s what they are “THE ROTTEN BLOODY PARLIAMENT”.
Kick the barstards out worthwith, if not sooner.
Will the lady in the palace please tell the nastiest PM in history to go. Please, please please.
payola
The Long Claim
“Rotten Parliament” has my vote
The late Idi Amin DeFence???
‘cos de carpenter cummin in de morning wid de nails for de Fence
John Renbourn used to play in a band called “Hogsnort Rupert and his Famous Porkestra”
This is a clear example of Porkestration.
On the other hand its just a CRIMEWAVE
“I have a little List” …. gate
Gardengate
expensivegate
GREED!
Troughgate – (I thought that’s what it was being referred to by everyone as anyway)
Grand Theft Autocrat
“Medieval Total Charlatans”
Trough Wars4: THere’s No Hope
Trough Wars5: The Proles Strike Back
Trough Wars6: Return of the Fawkes
Trough Wars1: The Phantom Flippers
Trough Wars2: Attack of the Nokia Phones
Trough Wars3: Revenge on the Spliff
My lawyers will be in touch shortly…
Fiddlegate
THe Great Expose
Onanigate; fantasising over Jacqui too much, perhaps.
I’ll get me mac….
The broke Parliament.
Fiddlefest
Fraudfest
Commons theft
Is my “trufflegate” awating moderation?
Stretching it slightly I would go with OBFUSGATE.
“DoTheyMeanUs?Gate”
Reality
Pun on trough, of course with the luxurious and expensive truffle often found by pigs!
Parliamentary pillage
It’s the end of an era
Dear Mr. Guido,
I am considering making a complaint to the Broadcasting Standards Authority as the BBC keep showing Margaret Beckett before the 9 o’clock watershed.
My pets and children have been traumatised and are now having difficulty sleeping.
Are any of your other contributors experiencing similar problems?
Yours sincerely etc…….
I agree, saw her on Question time, strewth.
She was on Newsnight a few years ago. Paxo asked a question-she replied-Paxo then stated to the other bloke being interviewed ” So you’ve heard it from the horses mouth” After what he said had sunk in, there was barely supressed giggling-a classic moment !
Incitatus not is she
Sorry if this has been mentioned already but Dimbleby saying to Becket something like “…and the Daily Telegraph has fingered you a little hasn’t it?” was both a riotously funny cock-up and the cause of a deeply unpleasant mental picture.
one expence becket never claimed for was plastic surgery which would be essential to her job as an mp
delegate, fumigate, irrigate, relegate, castigate, expurgate, subjugate, interrogate, investigate
abnegate?
Gate is rather limiting as a descriptor
How about the Great Gravy Train Robbery ?
Why should “Tam o’Shitter” Dalyell get £8k of bloody bookshelves for his wee bawbies as a retirement present to himself from us. This opinionated Scottish leech and self-appointed parliamentary “expert” (on what-accountancy, fiddling,”the rules”?) should pay it back forthwith.
He actually claimed £16,000 but was knocked down to £8,000.
Red Tam socialist in tooth and claw.
What is it about these hypocritical socialist that hides their venal thieving ways.
Prefer the Tory Toff moat dredgers – at least they don’t pretend to be good.
Parliabent.
I like that one – Parliabent
Mastergate.
Kaufman the true Red Socialist. Kaufman the unctous. Kaufman the aesthete. Kaufman the moral leader. Kaufman the noble politician.
£8,000 TV
Kaufman the thieving piece of sanctimonious shit.
A fair point well made.
Doesnt the name Kaufman translate rather appropriately. Should be Kauf(withthetaxpayersmoney)man.
We should call it Animal Farm.
Everything-including-the-kitchen-sink-gate
Everything-including-the-kitchen-sink’s-plug-gate
Steal of the century.
How to claim a million.
Fraudsters`r`Us.
The unbroken rules.
Immoralgate.
Spivs law.
Days of dishonour.
Catch us if you cangate.
The worthless will.
Apocalypse Sows ( for the Harmpersons )
Westmonster claimsgate.
The pocket pickers.
The no shame claimers.
Green book scroungers.
Feedom of the damned.
Gimmiegate.
Add gate or scandal where appropriate.
Rulegate
the untrustables
the indefensables
or my fav the lying cheating selfserving scum sucking theives
How about Feesgate?
The greed of MPs has been shown up but also how ineffective the Fees Office has been (perhaps not completely the fault of the staff but it all revolves them).
moatgate
Monopoly-gate
They move their houses around with abandon. They use our money as if it isn’t real and get more without really having to do anything. Only problem is the ‘go to jail’ card seems to be missing.
the untrustables
the indefensables
or my fav the lying cheating selfserving scum sucking thieves
It is simply The Great MPs’ Expenses Scandal.Let us get away from the use of the word “Gate”
Caught-cull-’em
The Troughfathers (Expenses gate editions Part 1 2, and 3
The commissars say they are sorry? yeah I fucking bet they are!
‘The thieving bastards are only sorry they got caught gate’
The fucking bloated two faced scumbags have the sheer brass fucking neck to lecture us and expect us to follow the rules with no excuses and yet when these scum are caught with their grubby fingers in the till they spew out all the excuses in the world, bastards!
‘Fingers in the till and thieves together, fuck the poor people and let the scum eat cake gate’
Dave says he is sorry? yeah I fucking bet he is, he fucking will be when the voter finds out just how much money has been stolen, how little will ever be returned(yes Blears you fucking poison dwarf im looking at you) and how few will get punished, even the few scapegoats will be lavished with quango nonjobs and will be stealing more money from us not less.
The fucking sponging parasites even say “it was all a mistake” can you adam and eve it?
Knowingly stealing cash from ordinary people who could only dream of the tax free perks these commissars get and then cry about its all a mistake, uuuuugh these fuckers have no shame!
And your point is?
Name it Swine sue.
Independence Day
Zanushi – the absence of conscience
No doubt Swindlegate of Fiddlegate or some such dreary name will emerge. Not many entire Parliaments get a nickname (has there been one since the 1830s Reform Parliament?), but this House of Horrors is so egregious it deserves one. I hope it goes down in history as the Moat Parliament.
I think you will find that the B Liars parliament or the Brown parliament are best placed, until the next installment of respect destroying behavior comes along.
The Wrong Parliament? Where is our New Model Army though?
Cheque Gate
seconding “profligate”
Water Feature Gate
PORKMINSTER
Loreal Gate (because I’m worth it)
How apposite! Unfortunately, all the perfumes of Arabia (or L’Oreal) will not sweeten their little hands. The political classes have betrayed us all, and the stench of NuLab hypocrisy is the worst of all.
Parliamentfarmgate
(Have you read Animal Farm recently)
Trousergate
Hey I was gonna say that, great minds and all that. : 0
Jaffagate.
It’s all lies, I tell you.
Wastegate, then.
HOCgate
Gorbalsgate
Headlines: Telegraph please feel free to use.
Sin City Scandal.
The mother of all Parliaments- has died.
Meltdown2009.
Parliamentary Pickpockets-Exposed.
Unfair to pigs.
Pig sues for defamation of character.
We follow the rules and treat you like fools.
SwillGate.
ScaMP’s.
The Great British Expenses Con.
Odour! Odour! in the sty.
Walk of shame.
PIGSWILLGATE GOVERNMENT
Fiddlers Hall
The Wrong Parliament
Endgate
Parliament of Thieves
Memberscam
Porkonomics! :-)
Erected memberscam
Scumgate
Rulesrape
Fiddlegate
Don’t-give-a-toss-coz-we’ll-still-shit-all-over-you-fucking-proles-by-doubling-our-salaries-once-the-heat-is-off-gate.
Lucky In The Sty With Diamonds.
The name will be decided by an independent committee of senior MPs from all parties who will investigate and review this matter fully and report back in 2016.
the “eXes Files”
The Truth is In There – Somewhere….
We should not forget the young lady that started all this. What about Heathergate?
sorry posted this below, not having seen this first. Credit goes to you
SW1Gate
HOPgate
Troughligate as in pigs in the proverbial.
The Peasants Revolt.
Gotta-peculate-to-accumulate-gate?
The Great Debauchery
Gyonogate…….a bunch of twats being inspected very closely
Whoregate
How about ‘Pork-barrel-buffet-gate’?
The glorious and bloody revolution of 2010.
IMHO, the “-gate” suffix has been used for too long. As I heard on a comedy radio programme recently, just imagine the confusion that would ensue if ever there were a scandal about water.
Time for a new suffix. Why not pick another way of keeping people out of the grounds to your property?
So how about this as name: expensesmoat.
Porkcullis
Gordonghast
Not us, Guv – it woz the B N P wot dunnitgate.
FLOODGATE
After tomorrow it might be Ballsgate!!!
Great point
Blinky and his missus pin head are innocent of all charges. It was in the rules
Billings Gate
or possibly……billinsgate
Politicide
Down-The-Sink-Plug-Gate
Litigate
The dishonourable Parliament
For Alan Duncan – Garden Gate ?
For me this (ultimately unsurprising) exposé has demonstrated a tyranny far greater than that of the monarch Charles II that prompted, indeed drove, Oliver Cromwell to act, precipitated the Glorious Revolution and resulted in the supremacy of Parliament, the Declaration of Rights 1688 (a solemn and binding promise between the monarch(s) and the people that may not be repealed) and the consequent Bill of Rights 1689.
I propose that this episode be known as:
The Inglorious Revolution
Let-them-eat-cake-gate
Sorry, ‘-gate’ does rather seem to have been absorbed into the English language as a synonym for a major scandal.
Apologies also to the much-maligned Marie Antoinette.
No apologies whatsoever, though, to the vermin who infest Westminster, Whitehall and most areas of local government. You lot give pigs a bad name.
You missed the obvios there:- Sorry_Gate
dead-tree-gate
It’s-over- gate or just over-gate
times-up-gate
fiddlers under the roof
Thames-gate
emmpee-gate
gogate go-now-gate
shamegate
watergate II
disk-gate
i-came into-politics-to-make-a-difference-gate
The West-trough affair.
Orduregate.
reimburse_me_for_the_new_gate_as_well_gate
don’t_forget_the_receipts_gate
Oh_no_I_forgot_I’d_paid_the_mortgage_off_gate
or just the Cromwell quote:
venalslavegate
AH (C)
big-bengate
justgogate
From: Barefoot Boy with Squirrel for the Pot Pistol
To: Guy Fawkes with Faggot for that Barrel of Pistol Powder
“THE PORNOGRAPHY PARLIAMENT”
or
“THE PORNO PARLIAMENT”
Courtesy of Kingdom of England State Police Minister
nee Jacqueline Jill “Jacqui” Smith (Mistress Richard J. Timney)
who completely legally claimed on her Government of
England expenses, several of her pornography movies.
SWINEGATE springs to mind.
As for these “forgotten” paid mortgages…….. RUBBISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Today I received notification of completion of mortgage. It consists of a formal letter of acknowledgement and a massive package, containing Title deeds and a plethora of legal documents……….. all delivered by recorded delivery, addressed to the TITLE HOLDERS (me and Maw).
I fail to understand how you can forget something of that size and weight!
Advice to Old Grumpy – I was in the same situation a few years ago. Several months later I checked on the Land Registry online, and the bank’s charge on my property had not been removed. It was easily cleared up with a phone call to the bank, but I would encourage you to check the Land Registry in due course.
(The explanation was that electronic notification had been sent, but not paper, and LR won’t act without paper)
MoralityCheque
Just lose the f*cking annoying american ‘gate’ suffix !! surely the english langauge can do better…
Alternative suffixes…
‘trough’,
‘ceit’ (as in deceit, or conceit),
‘moat’,
‘mal’ (as in malady – thats malady, not m’lady),
‘cidious’ (as in incidious),
‘bauched’ as in debauched,
‘foul’,
‘fraud’,
’sploit’ (as in exploit),
‘niquitous’ (as in iniqitous),
‘farious’ (as in nefarious)
‘taint’
or just call the whole thing “the bloody great piss take”.
“still got the stuff from years gone by and our whopping great pensions- you stupid fools’gate”
sorrygate
I-don’t-believe-it-gate.
MOATGATE
Because for me, it symbolises the extravagance they expected us to pay for.
The End of an Error.
Red hot readers wife gate
Wankgate
isn’t the suffix “gate” getting a bit past its best?
how about the suffix “famy” from “infamy” which could be used for any scandal or con.
In this case snoutfamy
Wankfamy
Hmmm
They are a complete shower of wanking troughoonanists.
doomsday
Perhaps ‘inadvertantoversighti’llpaythemoneybackgate’ lacks brevity, but not accuracy.
I quite like the idea of an apostrophe in the middle of a 41-letter word. Grist to the mills of pedantry.
Troughgate
Brownstuff.
BathPlugsRUS
Greedygate – i think it has been suggested before or was it greedgate
“The Great Malfeasance Scandal”
Actually, just seen
“Profligate”
up the thread and think its excellent! Especially with a definition like this:
prof⋅li⋅gate [prof-li-git, -geyt]
–adjective
1. utterly and shamelessly immoral or dissipated; thoroughly dissolute.
2. recklessly prodigal or extravagant.
–noun
3. a profligate person.
If the shoe fits…
PimpOurPayGate
showthemthegate
The Motherf*ck£r of All Parliaments
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/8051577.stm
Sureley Heather Brooke must be in the name. she deserves it more than anyone
Koshergate – No pork anymore !
The Greedy Parliament
This will go down in history as the Rotten Parliament.
We’ve already had one of those. The Ripoff Parliament?
How about:
“Moatminster”
It can be,
A noun………………..The Moatminster Scandal
An adjective…………To get Moatminstered
A verb…………………To Moatminster
“Bonfire of the vanities”
I hope we have the largest possible turnouts to the June elections and next years’ general election.The parties have become used to voter apathy which in no small part has led to the overwhelming attitude of complacency and arrogance. It is clear Brown and co. will hang on to the last possible moment.
This is a watershed moment and it must not be wasted. The mainstream parties need a severe and unforgettable kicking. Let’s see a lot of independants standing to the point there is N.O.M and maybe the true voice of the people (the vast silent majority in the middle) will finally be heard.
The temple needs to be cleansed. Enough is enough.
Twoloosgate. Plays on “to lose”. Has a dig at Two-Jags, always a pleasure.
At least Two Bogs buys cars made in Britain. Cameroon is chauffered around in a bloody Lexus. See how much he supports our industry – just like the police in their BMWs.
what british car is there to buy?
The Head-Swill Role
Thievingbastardsgate
Expense gate? Is that an instruction?
This government is so keen on league tables maybe a Troughers league would be a good idea Guido you could call it Top of the Troughs or The Troughers Rankings, be interesting to see how the Parties compare.A prize of a pigs head to the top trougher,bet the bookies would run a book.
Sounds like a winner to me!!!
EXSPENATHEFT SPINAFEST
TOTALXS
The Parliament of Drools
And some variations:
The Parliament of Jewels
The Parliament of Mewls
The Parliament of Rules (They were within them..)
The Parliament of Fools
Depre-gate
(From a definition of Deprecate: “to pray for deliverance from”)
I’m personally referring to this SCANDAL as:
Troughgate.
Enough said, really.
The Scandal of the one eyed tax man in dark glasses.
Not very snappy is it? But when is someone going to get around to this individual’s leading part in this affair?
I put it to you bloggers, that if you had made outrageous expense claims of your employer, and unbelievably got them paid, you would have come up against the eagle eye of his all seeing colleague in very short order. The current state of affairs could not possibly have got to the state that it has, without the very passive attitude of the tax authorities.
I predict with complete confidence that no one will publicly question the inaction of this all powerful sycophant and we seem to have no means to deselect him.
Maybe we should wait to see who the biggest piss taker has been, and just name it after them?
What a mess – they it’s a den of martins.
They all martin’d their claims.
How do you plead “stupid hoon” or “thieving martin”?
Its just the tip of the martin.
Another thought and more neutral. As everything revolves around houses.
“Houseminster”
The Great Betrayal
“Swinegate flu”
The pandemic of the noughties.
trottergate
Whilst being grammatically incorrect:
The Louses of Parliament.
spellt this way tROTTERgate or tROTTERSgate
tROTTERSgate
‘Billings-gate’ is the best -gate.
‘Troughery’ for the form of behaviour.
‘Heathered’ is the past participle describing those caught.
‘The Pong Parliament’. (The Wrong Parliament fits too much of the recent political mess.)
‘The Great Stink’ was a Victorian coinage for Westminster without proper sewers; it appeals to a sense of tradition.
‘Hard disks’ is the phrase that will replace ‘hard cheese’.
‘The Slimetrails Affair’ would do for an instant book
‘Telegraphic Receipts’ would give credit where it is due; and paid for.
‘Fawked Manure’ could be used to describe the eventual fall-out.
But ‘The Downloads Affair’, soon to shorten to ‘ Downloads’ is what will stick. After all, we all do a download in the appropriate place most days.
*
THOSE SUKKERS IN PARLIAMENT NEED SUPERSIZING
THE MORALSTATE SCANDAL
In the old days it would have been:
Profligate?
Expurgate
Newgate
THE COULDN*T CAREY STREET LESS
SANDAL
THE COULD KNOT CAREY STREET LESS
SANDAL
cpl jones says
the bastards don’t like it upm
this is the day the daily telegraph took back democracy for the british public
the revolution has started
Hans(ard) in the till?
scaMPsgate
fLaw n’ Order (order)!
PLEASE support the Daily Mails campaign to have these low life people brought to justice.Perhaps they will then get there memories back.
I hope that the former occupants of No.10 are included in the proceedings.
There will be a lot of happy people around when they are lead away.
Vouchergate ?
Tabgate ?
Slategate ?
NIMBYgate ?
Flippergate ?
Martingate ?
Speaker’s Corner(ed) ?
Mickgate ?
Residence Evil ?
Broons a HoonGate
ATMgate ?
Receiptgate ?
Fillyerbootsgate?
Guidogate ? more McPoison tale
Castigate ?
Unevengait ?
Dogsdinnergate ?
Kellygate ?
The Great Flip and Stole Swindle.
PerksRus
Trottersgate ?
Guido,
So who won the prize?
The prize being a second home at a location of your choice, with new kitchen and bathroom, fully decorated & furnished with Plasma TV and crystal lamps (all from J.Lewis), free cleaning, free gardening (moat & manure included) and free first-class travel?
All on your generous expense account of course with no plod or Inland Revenue in sight.
Your local Labour MP
Mr Ivor Expense-Account
You forgot the free food, free dog food, free gerbil food, and the £50,000 a year salary for ‘constituency work’ to the relative of your choice. Plus business class air fares anywhere you want, or first class if you are one of the hundred MPs anywhere near the government, and best of all…
Free chauffeur-driven limousines to all of the ‘manly’, ‘working class’, ‘proletarian’ football games of your choice (with free champagne and caviar in the executive box of your choice).
Greedygate ?
Greedgate ?
Pariahgate ? play on pariah state
The silence of the pigs.
Houseofparliamentgate ?
HOPgate ?
or 2HOPgate ?
Brawngate… (Pig dish plus a pic of McIdiot)
Moi?gate (with a Miss Piggy pic)
What about a T shirt competition? And some bumper stickers…
Can we have a list of ALL MP’s and where they stand in the fingers-in-the-till-gate??? The 2 MP’s round my way are refusing to disclose anything, and the Telegraph has yet to disclose anything… they both voted with McBraindead against the Gurkhas, and, for that alone, I would like to see them caught out! Sanctimonious areslickers, the pair of ‘em…
Hoongate
mentalist cripplegate
Let us not forget those that deserve to be remembered:
Nice Mr. B. Liar famous for ‘trust me I’m a kinda straight sort of guy’ and his infamous wife Cherie Blair who charged New Labour a £7,700 bill for a personal hair stylist during the last election campaign.
Unfortunately it seems that B. Liars expenses have been shredded ‘by mistake’ so all that’s left to uncover is his ‘blind’ trust.
Then there is Derry Irvine the man who first employed Anthony & Cherie as pupil barristers who later became LORD CHANCELLOR under the Blair government. A total of approximately £650,000, including hand-printed wallpaper worth £59,000 of taxpayers funds, was said to be spent doing-up his official residence.
But pride of place is still given to Gordo for his sick understanding of what is right all as epitomised in his his 200-page survival guide, Alternative Edinburgh, in this he openly encouraged students to “use and abuse” the Welfare State. Mr. Bean the ‘Saviour of the World’ who has no work experience in the private sector but has all but sold his soul to it gets the nod.
“Browntrowsergate”
Tony Blair was a pretty straight sort of guy but if he were completely bent this would not have happened.
A name? StephenFrydidnot getanyandhadtogoweeweeweeallthewayhomegate.
Moregate ?
Morgate ?
Curtainsgate ?
Locationgate ?
WEANgate – wholly exclusively and necessarily
Nemesisgate ?
Hubrisgate ?
Gordons’knotgate
Business as usual.
Colgate, mate – it’s given us that ‘ring of confidence’ smile.
Then there’s the move rights to consider …
Swineflu over the Commons Nest
Filthgate, sir but don’t expect us to clear up the mess. Over.
It’s Cash for Cushions:
http://www.libdemvoice.org/cash-for-cushions-the-wordcloud-14671.html
We need to be angry not amused.
This too: Should have been funny, but really isn’t.
Raw Meat Gate – or the RM scandal.
This Little Piggy Gate – or TLP.
The reckoning.
It HAS to have Heather Brooke in the name. She deserves to go down in history for exposing this
I Agree
Comeuppance
Pork-a-Thon
The expenses crunch
The people strike back
Troughing bubble crash
Telegate
Barclays Revenge
The Sark Lark
But above all:
“Speakers Gate”
We need a comparison with the claims made before the Speaker purged the top tier of Commons officials – to remove those who would not only give good “advice” but ensure it was followed: whether with regard to police raids or expense claims
143 does it for me -
Animal Farm
Works on several levels.
The Purge. The Great Firing.
I like this. ^
It’s all getting a bit tabloidy with the -gates. We need something more historic sounding.
Yes, ‘The Purged Parliament of 2009′ has certain ring to it and I can see it in the pages of a history book.
The Snollygoster`s Club
( Snollygoster: etm. American 19 century – a shrewd, unprincipled person, shyster, especially a politician – word used by President Truman in 1952 who defined it as a man born out of wedlock. Meaning is very apposite to-day.
It has to be WISTERIAGATE.
“Snotgate”
Pig Fright. Pig Flight. Some article here even said ‘Pigs Flu’.
Pirates of the Privy Purse…………. The Curse of the Silver Disc….
The fright of the pigs.
The silence of the pigs.
The flight of the pigs.
The firing of the pigs.
‘Gravygate’ combines the necessry elements of lucrative scam and criminal abuse.
The raid on the piggy bank.
Alternative ordering.
The firing of the pigs.
The fright of the pigs.
The flight of the pigs.
The silence of the pigs.
Shouldn’t the frying of the pigs be in there somewhere?
Excellent suggestion.
“Absolutely brilliant” Chris!
Or you could just say
The firing of the pigs,
The silence of the pigs.
Swine Flu
I can’t read through all the above, so if not yet mentioned how about:
PIGGYGATE
ANIMALFARMGATE – let’s face it, Orwell was spot on describing NewLab “… some are more equal than others”
Asnout turn
TwoLoosgate?
marrgate – but only if he has been fiddling expenses.
Shame none of them bought a trumpet on their expenses (as far as I know),
as then I could say
The Last Trumpet.
Watergate
“No whitewash claimed for at the whitehouse”
Wankergate
“Open-Gate”
Captures the political culture, the public perception, and politicians’ angst.
Greed feed.
Broomsday.
You know, need a broom to clear out the mess. Pity if none of them “bought” one of those. Did they?
Has to be Porkergate!
The “Purer than pure furore”.
How about a “Purer than pure cure”?
Hoongate
…and watch the gate doesn’t hit you on the arse on the way out.
Hog-mania (and not just the Scottish piggies at New Year or that jolly good chap with the moat)
The hogmen.
I reckon Guy Fawkes night should be moved to June 5th.
There’s gonna be a party!
What tiresome repetitious nonsense to call every political scandal “gate”
Get some imagination people.
OK – here’s a good one:
“Back-Door”
Politocalypse.
Definition:
A culling of the excesses of the politocracy eg
– snouting or silverspooning
– smearing or spinning
– anything else we don’t like
The exposition of greed in politics.
Alternatively, the political class see themselves as predators, political predators. So they naturally see Predation on the Public Purse as a just entitlement. Making them Political Predators of the Public Purse. Having been exposed this surely makes them
Political Parliamentary Predators of the Public Purse, Exposed
or shortened to PPP-PPE
better than poo-poo I suppose.
From the Telegraph this morning :
“Tales from the Trough”.
Not bad.
How about
“Porkatrough”
or even
“Totas Porcus”
How about:
“Bill Gates”
Can’t imagine the BBC going for it though, could change it to:
“Bills-Gate”
Ooops,
Should be: “Totus Porcus”
Broomsday Broonsday.
Fall of the moat bridge.
Have we had, Porkagate, I am sure we have but that’s how I feel. What a load of *****s
The Westminster Bacon-slicer Massacre
The Big Stink! OK I know it’s been used before but it was as correct then as it is now
Hoongate
ornamental gate on expenses gate
speakergate
Gardengategate
Stygate
Horse-shit Gate
manuregate
Animal Farmgate or the Piggy Parliament
Bonfire of self-idolatry.
WestminsterFuckpigs Gate
The day MPs found how crass their slogan of “If you have nothing to hide you have nothing to fear” really is.
slight error of judgement gate
PoliticiansAreFuckingNotWorthShite Gate
ParliamentSux Gate
A big boy did it and run away Gate.
LaughingMySocksOff Gate
“Marks and Expenses”
JailTheBastards Gate
TheSystemIsWrong Gate (not my fault…)
Fucked Gate
TheDayDemocracyDied Gate
Order-Order Gate
How about ‘Another Labour Government’? Don’t even need a Gate, Guv’nor.
Welcome to a party political event of the highest order where even now as their party crumbles, politicians dig that hole deeper with their snouts and their silver’d spoons deep in the trough, while simultaneously vying to not lose face.
For your entertainment we have not one, not two, not three, five or even ten, just simply uncountable hordes of officials, elected at great, nay monstrous public expense, who will talk, squirm, cavort, or just about anything you can think (and a lot of things you woudn’t dream of) if you will only believe in them, trust in them and take of their coin (which is actually your coin).
Methinks you are surely on the verge of witnessing a mass extinction event of the highest quality. All the pain is self inflicted, all a joy to watch
The Politicides of Expenseminster
The Reckoning. The Great Shaming.
ServesThemRight Gate
ManuresticksGate
Off with their heads to the Tower of London Gate
From The Sunday Times
December 21, 2008
June election would be ‘ideal’, says Gordon Brown ally
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article5375670.ece
So, Six months is longer than a week in politics!
Theyclaimforthem Gate
or perhaps
Theyclaimforthemselves Gate
Both of which are plays on http://www.theyworkforyou.com
Swinegate … accurate AND topical ….
It’s America’s Fault Gate.
Or maybe Martingate ? Speakergate?
Someone switch the light off and close the gate.
Very Good!
Expense Seive
Fannygate after Jaquis second porno allowance
By Junius
What about ‘ Feesgate’ ( already proposed) – for strict relevance
or ‘ Robbergate’ – for clarity
The Corrupt Parliament
The Fifth, Last & Worst Labour Parliament – ever (I hope)
Meek-gate
… when they are gone , what will be left for us tax payers ?
“Fiddle-gate”
Bill-gate : or would that be extremely-soft on them?
The curious case of fraud and glutton
Close encounters of the fraud kind
moatbusters
Dachagate.
It’s Nixon. It’s Brezhnev. It’s another Labour government [sic] on its knees in the midst of economic and social ruin..
I agree, that ‘-gate’ suffix feels dated and has been done to death, but then, so has this current shower of churlish ex-Marxist-student oafs who deign to rule over us. Let’s finally put it to bed with Gordon. It seems strangely *right* to do so.
Now recruiting! Hogmanauts for exploring swillspace in search of Planet Pork. You will be using the recently invented flipping drive guided by the ingenious moral compass software and using Brownian motions.
Lack of moral fibre an advantage.
What’s wrong with the blindingly obvious: “Troughgate”
In homage to a fine tradition, surely “Troughergate”?
How about a James Bond theme:
The spies who robbed me
Buy and let now
Two homes are not enough
Buy another day
Dr Moat
You only steal twice
Moneyraker
For your pokets only
Licence to Steal
Bearing in mind the defence used by these troughers when they were caught:
The Nuremburg Parliament.
when one becomes an MP one walks through the Pearly gates of the Parliamentary Fees Office…”just gimme the cheque there’s a good chap..”
this scandal is thus dubbed..
Parli-gate
” The Rottery “
Ripoff dot commons
The pong parliament
Phewthankgoodnessthey’reonlygoingbackfouryearsgate
BRITAIN’S GOT CRIMINAL TALENT
Traitorsgate!
THE CHARGES OF THE SHITE BRIGADE
[there are about 600 of them....and it ought to be the valley of their political demise]
How about Gnome-Gate maybe as its the only thing they haven’t ‘yet’ been claiming for.
or reuse and old one and make it more topical.
Plug-WaterGate as I remember that was what all this started with.
CLAIM CHOWDER
gate-gate
gategate-gategate
GATE
gatey-gate
get-a-gate
gota-gate
greater-gate
greatest-gate
grab-a-gate
The Parliament With No Shame.
Gorge-gate (in line with the theme of stuffing themselves and greedy pigs)
The 646 Fraud
or, The 646 Scam
Bill-in gate
FIDDLERS ON THE SPOOF
The should be hung Parliament
Aw, come on, it’s got to be “Brit-gate”!
This name has got everything. The self-appointed, smug ‘Mother of Parliaments’. A state with no written constitution, so it’s legislature is above the law. The bizarre concept of Parliamentary Democracy which puts these MPs above other people.
All British unionist parties involved but not the Scottish and Welsh nationalists. This is definitely a long-running British disease.
And, of course, no revolt on the streets. Imagine if this was France, Italy, Belgium. There’s be riots by now.
or, to give credit to new media’s part in the shoot ‘em down……..
Massively Multipiggy Outlay Recovery Pisstake Game
The Great Expenses Swine-dle
I need a new top of the range Garden Gate Gate.
Newgate now!
….but they’ve probably claimed for that already… :-(
Pigs ‘R Us?
Well, could we maybe credit them with the addition of a new word to the lexicon? How about
‘disclosophobia’
The Awakening
Snoutminster:
noun…..a snoutminster
adjective…..snoutminstered
verb……..to snoutminster
gerund……snoutminstering
Stewminster?
The snoutminstering Justice Minister Smart Malik said he was 1000% clean.
I wonder how many of his constituents might think it right for the taxpayer to buy him a ₤2,600 home cinema?
We all know. Precisely none!
That is snoutminstering of the highest order
When are we going to hear about Cooper and Balls ? It’s too quiet.
?
“Animal Farm”
as all MPs are equal but some are certainly consider themselves more equal than others.
Like it! (plus added bonus, it doesn’t have the cliche USA word ‘gate’ attached)
ordure gate
Book paper and film titles.
The Big Fuckoff Surprise (not) Gate.
Swillers with trotters on the Tillers.
Curly tails and audit trails.
The Bacon Connivance.
Climbing the “Walls”.
The thief of DadsBag.
Pigs for a day. ( poor pigs are far nicer than any Mp)
Above the Law.
Hoggs and hospitality.
Swine Fever.
Spit Roast Shahid.
Uk Parliament- The day after democracy.
Ali Malik Babba and his 600 thieves.
The MP’s guide- how to lie, cheat and steal your way to the top.
Accounting for Dummies.
Accounting for MP’s.
427 ways to make a claim.
Lies for professionals.
Suspicion- a beginners guide to avoiding it.
How to fuck up a country.
The art of Makeup.
Jaqui does Dallas.
How to look young by Margaret Beckett.
Courage- an in depth assessment by Gordon Brown.
How to mismanage your mortgage.
Plasma Tv’s- how to fiddle with them.
Second homes- how not to fiddle with them.
The Pig Roast
Who could oversee our Masters when they want to oversee themselves.
Quis custodiet custodes.
I like the sound of Swinegate
“Swinegate” is good.
It has my vote.
TROUGHligate !
MP’s first day at The Palace of Snoutminster:
The difference between secondary and primary (aka how to trough the taxpayer)
Secondary is primary when not secondary and secondary when not primary but can be secondary-secondary when there is no primary or can be secondary today, primary tomorrow and secondary the day after once you’ve trousered a tax free gain and want to buy a home cinema, bookcase, silk cushions, light bulbs, a take-away, a fridge, a masssage chair or have your moat cleaned.
Secondary or primary can relate to houses, flats, an under stair cupboard in a relative’s house, a designer hotel or a private members club.
Sleep-overs with lovers and pets could influence the location of where you normally sleep and whether the silk sheets are essential to your performance and thus an allowable expense. Such a claim could only apply to sleep-overs in a secondary site but as you are both judge and jury on this matter, the Fees Office will defer to the discretion of the Right Honourable Member.
How about “Parliamentary expenses scandal”?
Total Balls-up gate
Abrogate
Expurgate
Investigate
but my favourite is Trousergate
Supermarket Sweep
Snottergate
Dungate.
There’s a farm near Reigate, Surrey of this name, oddly enough.
the Mother Of All Gravy Trains
Martinsgate
Floodgate
“Flipping Parliament”
All I know is that for the first time in 20 years of marriage I am ranting less than the wife. People who don’t usually give two thoughts about politics are suddenly discussing why the British system is so sick. That must be healthy. But only if we don’t all go back to sleep.
I humbly suggest:
(The) Pick-pocket Parliament
Profli-gate
‘Swinegate’ seems to be the popular choice.
Snouts, troughs, flu – it all fits perfectly.
The 2nd Great Stink
or the even greater stink
how about Traitorsgate because that is what they should be going through to the tower
sorrygate
Has anyone claimed for a gate?
In which case, gategate
I think the whole ‘gate’ thing is too American, we need something more unique and more British, how about ‘The expenses party’
Plasmagate
MediaHypeFeedingFrenzy )!(
How about Trottergqte?
FLIPPERGATE
Grabbergate. As any fule kno.
Profli-gate
Money Parliament
Remember, that is what MP now stands for
And remember it again when they give themselves a big pay rise.
Claimgate or
Hoongate
becaus they’re all a bunch of fuckin hoons.
Halloween has come early with a twist, it’s now “Trick and Treat”, Trick the public out of their money and treat themselves. There fore the scandal should be called “Grabgate”, as they are out to grab anything they can get.
Mercenary Parasites -gate!
Hide Perk Gate
Excellent!
I really like that one.
Troughgate is difficult to bypass.
A simple Saxon/Norman word, which says it all.
Now lets hang draw and quarter them.
Yes, Troughgate sounds just about right.
I sense history may well call it MoatGate — but of course the gate normally at a moat is a portcullis
The Great Gravy Train Robbery
Let’s call it what it is – The Spiv Parliament
Houses of Plenty – gate
Anything but *gate, dear Guido!
The history now unwinding before us is not a pale echo of American history.
It is our own history, here on our island home!
PorkLips Now!
Fuckoffnowgate
The Pigflu Purges
Shits United
Loanbusters
Taxi for Martin?
Tumbrils for Troughers
Nixon’s Heirs
Who’s Sorry Now?
Sausage Factory Favourites
Pigs_in_shit_a_gate
Fiddlegate?
a ‘LIGHTBULB MOMENT’
Buffersgate , as in the day the gravy train hit the buffers.
Flippergate.
Flippergate sounds good…I fired off a letter to The Sun suggesting they run with the Headline :
======================
SACK THE FLIPPING B’STARDS?
======================
Billsgate
Scumgate
Well whenever a bloody laugh was needed, it is now, some of the suggestions have cheered me up no end, after reading on the f2c blog, at least 3 of the biggest troughers are the biggest anti-smokers ever errrghh.
I can smell the stench of hatred and anger brewing, from here!
I do feel sorry though, for those who have not been troughing. None of them will get my vote though, but I will vote.
Mine is “portuculis downgate scandal” lol
mandyv
Troffergate
Ripofferama
This-is-what-happens-when-you-allow-some-talentless-jerk-to-install-himself-unelected-as-Prime-Minister-but-he-doesn’t-have-the-fucking-balls-to-tackle-all-the-thieving-shysters-that-infest-Westminster-gate.
Or ‘Thisgate’, for short.
unbefuckinglievable-gate.
claimed-for-a-gate ?
have we had ‘fiddlegate’ yet ?
fleecegate ?
we-have-your-money-and-we-are-laughing-at-you-gate ?
your-granny-starved-to-death-in-a-filthy-NHS-hospital-but-i’ve-just-had-the-bowling-green-done-thanks-old-chap-gate ?
Why-the-fuck-are-the-Police-not-making-arrests-gate
The Credit Munch !!
Animal Farm-Gate?
Shame Claim Gate
The Estuary of Pigs fiasco
Seeing as it was all the fault of Mrs Thatcher I propose
Missusthatchergate.
Remember kids Vote Labour!
JULIE KIRKBRIDE MP
David Cameron and the Telegraph have only part-facts. The graud is far greater than reported and Kirkbride is more culpable than MacKay. They do not have aa `family` home in the constuency. Ut is a flat on the top floor of Beoley Hall, and is the home of Kirkbride`s brother, Ian Kirkbride. He therefore benefits in kind at taxpayers expense. He is also paid for computer work out of parliamentary expenses and has no other job. Kirkbride purchased the flat for £95,000 in 1997 and completely refurbished and furnshed it at taxpayers expense. The mortgage was repaid and a new mortgage taken out in order to continue with the fraudulent activities. After only four years it was refurnished again at taxpayers expense but the new items were receipted to Bromsgrove but delivered to London. The £50,000 claim for a bedroom extension is also a fraud as the Bromsgrove flat is not capable of extension and it is a listed building. Where is the planning application and listed building consent? It would also be interesting to have the name of the recipent of £2,100 cleaning costs and the receipt. Kirkbride also claims £1,300 spouse travel costs even thogh MacKay is hardly ever there and Beoley Hall is certainly not `home`. Meanwhile Mackay claims £500 in reciprocal travel costs for his wife in yet another spectacular act of deceit.
Nor do this pair own a flat in London as reported . They live in a large Georgian house in Vincent Square. Is spouse travel for trips to Bracknell or simply a double scam for going home? David Cameron has it wrong when he says the remedy is deselection because Kirkbride has her association sewn up and they will back her. The rerason is simple: Kirkbride exerts total financial control over the Dent family. Rita Dent is association secretary paid out of taxpayer funds, and a councillor following Kirkbride`s unsavoury discrediting of the sitting councillor who was anti-Kirkbride. Unemployed husband Alan Dent became a councillor under similar circumstances, and is now also association chairman. Daughter Naomi Dent was employed full-time as nanny to Kirkbride`s son Horatio at their London home, and her salary was claimed on parliamentary expenses as secretary. This family control the association on Kirkbride`s behalf. Any selection meeting would be fixed. David Cameron needs to grasp the nettle and remove her. If he does not his welcome tough-talking will be a sham. The problem will not go away. Kirkbride is a liability and these latest frauds are just the tip of the iceberg and there will be more to come. However messy Cameron must grasp the nettle now or the Kirkbride problem will continue to grow. A major fraud has been committed and Cameron needs to distance himself and the party from it – now!
(ps for an excellent analysis of the MacKay character see `Cranmer`- it reads as if the author knows MacKay almost as well as I do!)
Totally agree, we must clean out the debris – the hollier than thou class – who are basically self intrested hypocrites and not ‘wise persons from and answering to the electorate’.
*
IS VICTOR BLANK A BLANC BLANQUE BANGQKH CZECH
OR IS VICTOR BLANK A DGJEWISH
NAME
[...] controversial British blogger Guido Fawkes (the nom de guerre of Paul Staines) took up Hoggart’s challenge and solicited ideas from his [...]
Trousergate
Moatageddon
Please, Please, Please……….ENOUGH
The truffle kafuffle