Rich & Mark’s Monday Morning View
Another Twittish Tweet from Kerry McCarthy | BBC
What’s the Point of Our Anti-Business Secretary? | Ruth Porter
HuffPo Hiring Pro-Iranian Mehdi “Act of Desperation” | Fox News
Krugman is Seductive, Simplistic and Unrealistic | Jeremy Warner
Lower Taxes, Higher Growth, the Statistical Evidence | CPS
Bash the Unions, Gatecrash the Quangos | ConservativeHome
I Told You So: Euro is Doomed | Douglas Carswell
PM Speaks for the Nation When Bashing Balls | Quentin Letts
Time for an Alliance | Dan Hannan
Farage’s Plan | ConservativeHome
Guardian Open News is a Failure | Heather Brooke
Balls Calls for Deeper Cuts | Speccie
Lessons from the Thirties | CPS
PMQs Idiots | Harry Cole
Jon Cruddas is Not the Messiah | Dan Hodges
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Lord Lamont told ITV News…
“I think the PM is just human and Ed Balls is a pretty irritating person”
is that Hoons Ass
My God just when you thought MP’s couldn’t sink any lower:
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article6262083.ece
Great cartoon!
How much longer can we put up with these bastards putting OUR money down OUR toilets?
I’m surprised he hasn’t charged taxpayers for someone to wipe that arse as well.
This is a real treat for our society and will be preserved in its annals.
Isn’t it disgusting to think that the taxpayer has subsidized the useless and repulsive sexual predator John Prescott to turn food into shit within his foul digestive system, and then pay for the toilets seats required to hold up his fat stinking arse.
Revelations covering a day where four British Soldiers died in Afghanisatan, one a Gurkha whose grieving wife then had to deal with the fear of the foul treasonable and dishonest government of the UK throwing her and her children out of the country. the same government that panders to Islamo-Fascism in order to hold or secure seats in certain key constituencies. Add to this the scandalous claim for a 5p shopping bag, defended by one ludicrous Labour supporter as OK because it was ‘resumable’ and then consider that soldiers in Afghanistan are short on essential equipment. The think what would happen if a single mother on benefits was caught cheating – social services snatch child and she goes to prison…and then step back and take a long hard look at our MPs?
What are they?, what class to they belong in?
Honourable and Gallant? or, benefit scroungers, thieves, liars and incompetents no better than an enemy within our once great democracy, worse than the IRA (four of whom have received 500,000 pounds of taxpayers money for not turning up for work), inflicting more real damage on the country than Al-Quaeda?
You decide.
Great summary of this ridiculous and repugnant country.
First?
Technically, yes…
Is that a No 1 (First) then for each toilet bowl?
Counter system is really down the shitter at the moment
Loo-Seats Were Chewed – It was Bulimia says Prescott
Former Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott today defended his claim to have his toilet seat replaced – twice – by explaining it was all a result of his bulimia.
“I don’t know if you know – but I know if you don’t,” claimed Prescott, “but this bulimia is a terrible affectation. First you eat something – on the taxpayer’s expense – then you chuck the whole thing up because you feel guilty at being a burden to all the pensioners on £96 a week who have to eat cat food.”
read more: http://plonquer.blogspot.com/
lolwut?
No, second…
Thurd
Isn’t the cartoon the wrong way round or are we meant to all be Alan Duncan and spend our time in the back of trap 4 waiting for glory?
It’s drawn from the perspective of “Going Fouth” a return to roots?
Imagine being the poor odd-job man / plumber who fitted it…
You would imagine Prescotts jobbys would be more like depth charges than turds.
I bet most of the commons avoided the loo’s for an hour after a Prescott visit.
That’s exactly right, absolutely, no questions asked, on the money, no dispute, yup, no mistake err…. is that enough ed?
Ha ha!
Ho Ho
Bum bum
This is called Mock Tudor beams…
I win the prize Guido…hand down….aA ticket to the Strangers gallery for the next PMQs please …we will laugh our arses off…before “adjourning” to the Westminer Arms to celebrate…
You have to find a friendly MP for that. How many friendly MPs does Guido know now?
You mean there is not ONE MP who wants to clean up the act ?!
“”You have to find a friendly MP for that”
I’m sure, viewing their characteristics, you will find one that will sell you a ticket…
Bleagh. Think I’ll wait until you have a few more posts up before opening up this page again.
Yeah, I did not need to see that image.
Gordon Brown said that is a lovely sight!
Mandelson probably beat im to it
Luvvery jubberly!
Comment+Name=Priceless.
Well lubricated for entry
This is called Mock Tudor beams..I won Guido…and the quickest…I want the prize please…A ticket to the Strangers Gallery to laugh my balelless off at the next PMQs…with you…!!!
Mock Tudor arse more like…
Holy shit. Eeeww.
Thats not the Pope is it?
Typical Prezza – two bogs that we paid for and he still manages to shit on the floor…
John Prescott finally gets the honour he deserves
vote Labour, get Brown
Bloody hell the electrode woke up
Nice idea but the execution seems as rushed as one of Prescotts stools sadly.
Much better to have had the now infamous Prescott “gurn” staring back from the “double decker”.
Or the two bowls aligned with the Prescott “head” down one Toilet and his arse down the other.
)
(if we can assume for a minute there is some actual differentiation
Fucking Scat King
was there no room for tracy in this cartoon? may be he just shat on her eh?
The question that needs asking is did he have two toilets in the same bathroom?
If so.. why?
It was a bogof offer in B&Q.
We have a winner…!!
Only in a walled garden
oh come on! you are better than this!
its not even a good drawing!
What the hell did you want? A photograph??
Would have to be wide angle lens.
I don’t think you will find a young Soul Rebel up there!
I’m calling them Ed and Yvette.
Shit guzzlers the pair of them.
Biggest toilets in politics – no wonder they get Two arseholes John to shit on them – he has enough for a whole cabinet.
whilst no one smells of flowers in this it is worth noting just how much tax payer money was given to the failed bank bosses !!
Post all this we need an election labour have thrown our pension future into the casino let alone the immediate balance sheet problems .
puzzled to know why posts 1000 and 1001 needed erasing ??? nothing unkown in them
Prescott speech.
Brown’s make-up tips left in cab:
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2422245.ece
It’s because he’s worth it.
I think I’m going to be having nightmares this evening after seeing that.
enough!
That is filth.
But it’s good filth.
no… actually its shit
Another ribtickler. Roll over Steve Bell and tell Gerald Scarfe the news.
My God just when you thought MP’s couldn’t sink any lower:
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/politics/article6262083.ece
Labour Scorched Earth Project
The chances of Anything useful from Marr,
Where a million to one they said!
Andy Marr is getting worse – which is quite a bloody achievement. FFS there’s Peter Sissons doing the Saturday afternoon shift on BBC News 24 looking a bit bored and then Marr popping up doing utter drivel in all the headline slots. It’s a piss take of the highest order. Sissons is an old school journo who has more gravitas in his sock than shagger lefty Marr (never got any at school and even with fame & cash finds munters) has in his entire life & career.
It’s just fucking wrong.
hahahaha talk about making it look even worse
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2009/05/09/gordon-brown-to-go-nuclear-in-reshuffle-that-will-replace-jacqui-smith-with-alistair-darling-115875-21346084/
Go on, make it an even bigger landslide for the Tories.
you just could not make it up. At least we would be rid of that odious hypocritical chipmunk
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8zACFVUYYoE prezza
You know Prescott, the two bogs and Expenses are so rich in Political metaphor as to have Hogarth himself wet his nib in anticipation of such an event.
Here is another version that also explains the entire Expenses farrago…..
Imagine the two bogs at each end of the bathroom.
Prescott defecating in one while his head is momentarily rasied and gurning back at the viewer after upchucking in the other.
Above him is a large container marked “Iceland” (or wherever the Precott purveyor of feedstock was) from which there emerges a large funnel emitting Pizzas and other choice morsels so Prescott does not have to do more than crane his head up to recieve more “fuel” for he defecation/vomit endevours.
We also see tubes leading from underneath both Toilets link to one giant tube which emerges into a large Septic Tank.
This Septic Tank is inscribed proudly as FEES OFFICE.
The toilet recieving the Vomit is marked NEW and the Toilet receiving the turds is marked LABOUR.
The two bogs are also marked prominently with EXPENSES as are the tubes emerging from them and feeding the FEES OFFICE Tank.
And of course the container feeding the Prescott vomecation beast is also marked clearly as EXPENSES.
The toilet peper is of course red with the Red Rag label.
And to finish the whole Carnival of the Grotesque off…
There is a leak from the sceptic Tank marked FEES OFFICE spurting it’s effluent onto the front page of the… Telegraph.
Possible captions or this could be,
“Joined up Government!”
“Prescott leads the way on recycling!”
“2 jags doen’t give 2 shits and gives 2 fingers to the voter!”
“Efficiency cuts at the Fees Office were unlikely”
etcetera
Apologies. Various typos crept in there. Wondering why it needs moderation though ?
Mmm… kinda falls between two stools, really.
A demonstration of Turd way politics?
Last
Who said brevity is the soul of wit?
Fair enough I’ll stick with,
“2 Jags doesn’t give 2 shits and gives 2 fingers to the Voters”
Happy now ?
interesting digging going on into Blair how did he have a 240k mortgage for a 30k house , wonder if its similar scam to mandelsons ??, wonder if its a NR mortgage ?? wonder if its now a toxic debt ???
Looks more like a misprint to me.
Caesar’s Wife
He bought it for 30k several years previously, the (re)mortgage was for 100% of what it was worth at the time (240k), which he then used as a deposit on the London townhouse.
The thieving hoonery was that he could then START claiming interest on that loan from expenses as it was on his second home, which he didn’t do before as there was no mortgage…
That’s fraud, plain and simple. We won’t get the c’unt on starting an illegal war based on lies but we can on this one.
What you can hear in the Toilet:
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2009/05/09/gordon-brown-to-go-nuclear-in-reshuffle-that-will-replace-jacqui-smith-with-alistair-darling-115875-21346084/
and why the Balls are wearing a box
I deny everything. Especially the Tudor beams. And the deluxe croquet set. What? They didn’t find out about the croquet set? dammit!
Can I make it up on the assault cause near my ancestral home in wales
So anyone who says John Prescott couldn’t give two shits would be wrong! Heh!
Meanwhile, o/t but this is real sexism, Saudi-style
Sexism Saudi style
Fair play to her for rising above the terrible attack on her.
Such a gross concept – don’t know whether to laugh or puke.
Or have a shit.
One for you here, Mark.
Oh my God, all my chocolate fountains have come at once.
Skin dive!!
Cillit Bang – you KNOW it makes sense.
Election now.
Scat’s Entertainment….
I seriusly don’t think that i wil be abel to eat my lunsh after havin looked at that draing. Yukk that is disgustin
Anatolie
So you’ll be giving the pub curry a miss then?
Just a thought, chasps, but I wonder if you would care to join me on dwp.gov.uk/benefitfraud and fill in Benefit Thieves Reporting Forms on some, or all, of these mendacious, cork-soaking, self-abusers?
At the very least, it will make the Minister’s comments on the subject, should the system become overloaded, interesting to hear.
already done mate!
Message on website as follows….
Sorry, that page cannot be found
You are attempting to visit the following page:
http://dwp.gov.uk/benefitfraud
Unfortunately, this page cannot be found. This might be for one of two reasons:
1. The page has been moved or deleted
You can go to the Department for Work and Pensions homepage to locate the page you’re looking for. Or you can try to find it via the site map.
You can notify the Department for Work and Pensions about faulty links on this website.
2. You may have entered the address incorrectly
If you typed in the address of the page you were trying to reach, you may have entered it incorrectly. Check the address for errors and try entering it again.
If you are looking for an advertised job with DWP, go to http://www.dwp.gov.uk/working/vacancies.asp
Error 404: page not found
Scallywag
The Benefit Fraud site is on their secure server https://secure.dwp.gov.uk/benefitfraud/
You could try going onto the Met Police Website – and getting fraud in Westminster as one of the areas policing priorities.
It’s still there.
Go here and fill in the form online
https://secure.dwp.gov.uk/benefitfraud/
If anybody wants to make a point about Margaret Moran’s boyfriend getting his damp rot seen to in Southampton although Moran has homes in Luton and London, according to Wiki he is Mick Booker, who lives and works at Southampton University as the Safety Adviser.
Why we are paying to maintain Moran’s third love-pad is inexplicable. When a certain Mr Brian Riley fiddled his housing benefit to get two homes, neither the court nor Tony McNulty of the DWP accepted that Riley was “entitled to a family life” as an admissible excuse, although his actions were precisely that – his new wife (not just his girlfriend) was living in Sri Lanka and he kept popping over to see her. Riley got 6 months for a £30k fiddle.
http://tinyurl.com/the-life-of-Riley
A little lenient as far a fraud cases go, but a useful yardstick to measure the MPs expenses irregularities. A 12 month sentence per £50k’s worth of fraud. Good idea.
These Minister and MP twats will get out of bed this morning, relieved that over the weekend they haven’t been hung, drawn and quartered, look in the mirror and smerk “Business As Usual”.
What’s new? Prescott has been showing his arse for years
Bye-Bye darling monday morning and back to the Westminster pig farm and don’t forget to get a Safeway receipt for the toilet rolls.
well he has to have two shit-pots, one for the rich and one for the poor , you don’t think tjis two jag twat will just shit on the rich do you,… and leave himself open to being la-belled a class bigot
It’s 56,308 plays 23 including such luminaries as…
Ivor Broquen-Printer
Albert Tatlock
Willy E. Kerslyke
Rex Mobiles
Gerry Mannering
Wrecks
Lou Tenon-Pillargin
Chuck Brown
Ivan Astitempurr
Phil Mitroff
Ivor Knowe Morrell-Kumpass
E Lexyunnow
Ty Mtugosed
Zeb E Dee
Impressive, or what?
The original ‘Support the PM’ Petition is now up to a massive 76. Names there include:
# Ben Tazzanine
# Bob Knowett
# Bourne Knievel
# Alexandra Torregrosa-Jones
# Miss Inga Phuscruze
# Dee Menscher
# A. Sandwich-Short
# Thomas Saxondale
# Maurice Yeatman
# Chucky Harbottle
# Spense S Fiddler
# Phil Mitroff
# Chuck Brown
# Charles Godfrey
# Joe Walker
# Carol Sell-Magic
# Ermintrude Lavache
# Ivan Astitempurr
# Robin M Blighend
# Mr Rusty
# E Lexyunnow
# Ty Mtugosed
# Zeb E Dee
And don’t forget the new one http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/GoToCountryNow/
2,468 and counting on that one.
Happy Monday morning
In the words of Roy Keane to Alf-Inge Håland: “Take that you Hunt!”
Pounds? Pounds? Euroturds have been quoted in kilos for years!
I find that cartoon of Mr Prescott grossly offensive. He helped set Common Purpose up and should be applauded for his efforts instead of being reviled by the riffraff who produced that drawing.
LOL
Guido, you are incredibly disgusting. How could you publish such a thing? Would never be allowed in the MSM. Greetings from a hot and sticky New Delhi.
I blame the chillies.
And now i feel ill, thats an image that`ll take a while to rid my mind of
Haven’t heard a lot of “Nothing to hide, nothing to fear” recently. Very strange.
I’ve shat(tered) both seats now! That’s what you get for Ruskin’ ah s’pose……Bugger!
I’m sick of the sight of that spluttering, wheezing old tosser Stuart Bell on every news channel telling us that MPs “feel our pain” !! They really do think we plebs are stupid.
He is a sleazebag caught in a hilariously backfiring case of Nepotism had him hiring his own son as a researcher who then stole £2000 from another MP and got charged by the Police for it.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/1766321.stm
That should be E-Mailed to every News outlet who carries the words and disgusting excuses and justifications of this odious shameless cretin but does not have the guts to ask him how he has the brass neck to presume to lecture the Electorate on the “honesty and probity” of MP’s.
If the public are made aware that he is a close friend of Gorbals mick any proposals he is making is coming the problem itself and is certainly not the solution.
As I said in OUR money down OUR toilets, his food was paid for on expenses: £4,800 per year. A pensioner has to live on £4,900 per year.
Look, I said sorry this morning on TV. Now fuck off and leave me and my snout in trough in peace.
P.S. Don’t forget to vote for me, thanks (I need to keep up the mortgage(s) payments don’t ya know) and the wifes seen some new wallpaper she wants.
sqweeeak, sqweeak, I just got a new porn film, its called Taxpayer Deliverance.
SQUEAL SQUEAL WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Britain’s biggest arsehole
Seconded
Cheeky boy.
Two fat bogs – click click click
Absolutely revolting, you have captured him to perfection.
Our resident plumbing specialist has an update on Sir Stuart Bell MP: The Horrible Fucking Bastard
Why was Stuart Bell ‘knighted’?
Obviously for this kind of creepy excuse making – is he standing down at the next election? Hope so.
Even northerners are going to be pissed off by that pseudo attempt at what he thinks is a posh accent.
Another Poster on here brought this to attention and it deserves as wide an airing as possible. Here is EXACTLY the kind of man “Sir” Stuart Bell is.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/1766321.stm
Here is exactly the kind of man Stuart Bell is.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/1766321.stm
Thanks again to the poster who first caught this as it should be read as widely as possible.
That’s “posh Geordie” he is speaking with and, fair enough, he’s from Gateshead. But what I want to know is this? Which team will the Invisible Man be supporting tonight in the dual to the death relegation clash between Noocassel and the Mighty Boro? In which executive box will he be sitting?
Was talking about this better fed George Formby lookie-likey yesterday. Nobody had a good word. Perhaps a stenographer sdrewed up and they meant Cur Stuart Bell?
SIR Stuart Bell if you don’t mind. He is a Freeloader, sorry Freeman of the City of London. Is there any fcuker in the Labour party who isn’t a Sir, Lord or Baroness.
Anyway Middlesborough are going down after tonights derby game with Newcastle and 3,000 steelworkers are about to lose there fcuking jobs on Teesside, but who the fcuk cares. Not that Prat.
can Prescott actually wipe his own arse?
He’s one of those no-neck short arms, fat gut kinda guy. So highly unlikely he could reach round his fat arse to his smelly crack. Which leaves the question – who does the evil deed?
Has any of ‘em claimed, yet, for a Mobile Dog Wash service?
Pauline, get ‘ere petal, I’ve done one of them faecal puddles again, luv. Do us a favour and get that slapper of an Estonian cleaner girl to roll up her fookin” sleeves and get busy, will yer luv? It’s what we pay her for — well ok, what we get the bloody little people pay her for. Same difference. Bleedin’ ‘ell, I’m ‘ungreh. Wot time does that bloody pie shop close?
Sounds like a job for Abu Hamza.
Charlie Brooker on Brown:
“In fact Brown’s extended drubbing has gone far beyond mere eeriness, and now teeters on the verge of harrowing spectacle – a protracted humiliation so total, so crushing, that merely witnessing it feels almost as terrible as being the man on its receiving end. It’s like someone’s dropped an indignity bomb directly on his head, and we’re all caught up in the blast.
Normally, to experience this sort of shared mutual shame, you would have to stumble unannounced into a room and unexpectedly catch someone doing something acutely embarrassing, such as masturbating or miming to Kaiser Chiefs in front of a mirror. ”
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2009/may/11/charlie-brooker-gordon-brown
Even funnier, his comment on waiting for the end of Brown’s premiership:
“It’s like being trapped in a hot room filled with an overpowering fart smell, waiting for someone outside to come along and open the window”
We pissed ourselves over our kippers this morning.
Anyone else want to try Gord’s make-up??
From the Current Bun-
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2422245.ece
Heard about Gordon’s slap? : Gordon Brown – You Couldn’t Make Him Up. Oh ho ho.
Prescott shows us where he got all his ideas from.
Hilarious cartoon.
I’m sure that John Prescott would find it funny too.
Such a disappointment as a government politician. I really rated him in opposition.
Did Rich & Mark draw this cartoon live or from memory?
For their sakes I hoped they drew it using their imagination. Trauma is a difficult thing to shake off, these days.
“Lynne Featherstone, a Liberal Democrat MP said members deserved public scorn over allowances. She said: “We have acted disgracefully and we are getting our due punishment.” it says in the DT.
What ‘punishment’ would that be, then? A bit of bad publicity? Hardly the sanction of the century. No one has been sacked, and repaying the cost of some dog-food doesn’t really atone for their crimes. Hit them in the pocket, that’s the only ‘punishment’ that will mean anything.
Cameron is right to apologise. I think he should also make his MPs pay back what they took and the worse culprits should resign – this would really show Brown and his motley crew of pigs for the dreadful leeches they are.
Listening to Margaret Moran yesterday trying to warrant the tax payer subsidising her partner’s home in Southampton was quite pathetic and she should be sacked. Does this woman have no integrity or moral values? Clearly not. Her lies and excuses just reveal how warped and twisted her mind is as she tries to cover up her fraudulent behaviour. The police should deal with her.
The irony is, she even looks like a bloated little shiny pink piggy. Too much of the good life me thinks!
He’s always spent so much time talking out of his arse .. I’m amazed it isn’t actually SIX loos …
Well you know people it really is a SHIT job, but someones gotta do it. Come on sing along together now.
“Woke up this morning wantin’ a SHIIIIIITTTTEEEEE, Ooooooohhhh ooooooohhhh I’m an ex-blairiteeeeee!”
Two Jags
Two Jugs
Two Jigs
Two Jogs
Two Bogs
And two fucking shags, as often as not!
O my God – Not again
Is that it then from the Telegraph, a waste of £300,000. Hope the mole gave a receipt, bound to turn up on someone’s expenses claim.
Rather low grade stuff this, isn’t it?
Prescott’s OK, Toilets Maguire will come along and clean up after him.
Sounds like a job for Mark Oaten!
Lovely!
The cartoon is a tad “tasteless”, but it gets the message across. Cameron has said sorry which is more than Brown has been able to muster. But if Cameron really wants “change” he needs to lead the way by firing his shadow cabinet members who have in the public’s opinion cheated the taxpayer out of their money. Now that would be real change and very admirable in my opinion. Remember Cameron actions speak louder than words.
Latest reaction from our politicians about expenses.
Labour: Create a new private expenses function. Make it outside the freedom of information act and then its back to the trough. That will fix the nasty general public for saying unkind things.
Conservative: We know this is not quite right and think this maybe bad for the publics perception of politicians.
No sh*t Sherlock. The tory answer is akin to someone standing in Hiroshima in August 1945, pointing at the B29 and saying “That looks like it may cause a little disturbance”.
I am not looking for some modern day rerun of the Monty Python “Four Yorkshiremen” sketch. The politicians do not have to bid against each other to see who can be toughest on expenses and the causes of expenses.
What they have to do is acknowledge the error of what has happened, create a new regime that mirrors the public experience and provide a timetable for implementation that has weeks as the longest time measurement.
If Lord Carey can understand the problem, how much harder can it be for MPs?
disgraceful (the MPs expenses not the RM picture)
Guido, you really, really, really need a new cartoonist. This is pathetic.
Listen you wankers; you’ve had your fun and now you can fucking well shut up for a minute and listen to the words of the world’s greatest orator! The reason that I need two bogs is that I have to eat a lot to set an example to the rest of this lot in the Westminster Club. We have a system of expenses you see and it’s a case of “use it or lose it” as far as I am concerned, so I need to show “honourable” members how to make the most of it. That’s why I shit a lot and need two bogs – simple as that. Hey though; talking of “honourable members”, I make sure that my honourable member gets a regular workout with anyone who needs to keep their job badly enough. Mind you, the lkabour chicks are getting a bit frayed round the edges and I’ve tried most of them (even “Lordy” Mandy), so I’m thinking of turning Tory and giving their fillies a go for a change. Anyway, now that I have so much money, I need to ditch Labour before the new tax band starts to hurt me. That’s all for now – I’m off for a shit!
Hey bigboy – maybe we could turn Tory together. I’ll give Dave a ring just as soon as you climb off me
Bugger off Mandy! I want to get my leg over some Tory pussy and try some of that caviar pie!
This is brilliant
Hell, that cartoon has put me off my chocolate surprise desert….
Last!