Friday Caption Contest


The Iranian Model is Hitler | Lawrence J. Haas
No.10′s Andrew Cooper Should Look at this Poll | Douglas Carswell
Livingstone Has Form on Homophobia | ConservativeHome
Investors HBack Over RBS Meddling | CityAM
Riddled With It | Pink News
I Went Mad in the Seventies | Ken
Guy Newsroom Splits | Indy
Polly’s Voodoo Polling | UK Polling Report
Labour SpAd Backs the Bill | Mark Wallace
Guido Goes for the Lobby | Press Gazette

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Max Clifford says…
“Most people want to read nasty things about people, not nice things.”

Maybe if they really wanted to “decontaminate the Labour brand” with business people, they shouldn’t have totally buggered up the economy?
Just a thought.




Ah get zat man avay from me – eee is cursed!
Gordo: “I’ve a plan to save the world”
Sarko: “The last man who had such a plan insisted we greet him like this”
FOOD FIGHT!
“I know you throw mobiles but please don’t throw the cutlery!”
Iran on Friday welcomed US President Barack Obama’s olive branch to Tehran but urged him to take concrete steps to repair mistakes that have frozen ties between the two nations for three decades.
Err what fucking mistakes? Beware ………be very very aware.
Mmmmm…..
Well, they could be talking about the CIA plot to unseat the elected Mossadegh and replace him with autocratic monarchy (how would you like that) or possibly us giving Saddam Hussein intelligence, money and the benefit of a naval blockade after he attacked them, resulting in over 1 million casualties including attacks on cities including 520 scud attacks (terrorism much) or the fact that the USS Vincennes shot down civilian airliner Iran Air Flight 655 resulting in 290 innocent deaths, (imagine a July 7 bombing for 6 days straight) or the fact that Saddam did use WMD against Iran.
Maybe those mistakes?
Learn your history before talking.
See you next Tuesday.
cock
Ahh as always selected statements to support a worthless cause. Of course the other guys (Iran) have never done anything whatsoever to bring this apon themselves. Ohhhhh no they are pure as the driven so to speak as we all totally FUCKING know they are INNOCENT.
Have you worked there? No well I have
You sir are an absolute twat and I suggest you get your head out of your arse and look yourself at history not your warped one sided fucking verison of it.
Jeez no wonder we have fucking wars with twats like you around.
FUCK OFF
Talk to the hand, cause the face is not listening.
“We took the Reich decisions to help the Economy”
Hitler was elected.
Mmmm…. not entirely, if you are to look
True singleactsoftyranny. No majority government, plebiscite not election, appointed Chancellor and stole the Presidency later etc.
Still, surely allow that “Follow The Paper Trail: Labour Damned By Their Own Bureaucracy” is close enough for a caption competition?
Sarkozy: Gordon, he zaved ze world.
Everyone: hahaha
Heil Brown. Heil Brown. Heil Brown.
god save our gracious QUEEN
Are you talking about Mandleson?
can’t be
mandelson is not gracious; slimy maybe; but like the rest of the incompetents just ungracious
Ein Reich. Ein Volk. Ein Fuhrer.
Heil Brown. Heil Brown. Heil Brown.
Sarko: Move away from the buffet, you troughing Hoons
Sarkosy…
“…and only the kaiser, the fuhrer and now Herr Brown have ever caused the Motor Show to be cancelled – Zeig Heil!”
You may think it’s funny but I really hope it’s not that bloody fondue stuff again.
Credit crunch? What credit crunch?
Two Irishmen in a graveyard and one says to the other – that fella was really old when he died.
How Old?
179
What was his name?
Miles – from London
Somehow I can see the relevance.
No Gordon – vous ete une numpty – we are not going to salute you when Obama arrives.
Have we the deep-fried Mars bars for Mr Brown?
Gordon Brown, the known after diner speaker and part time PM tells the old one I say, I say, my banks got no money, brings his colleagues to hysterics.
Politicians practice movements for ‘Strip the Willow’. Or the ‘Gay Gordons’.
“La rive gauche is zat side, you ignorant rosbif!”
When the level of bullshit from Gordon reaches this high, those not drowned stand on the chairs ok?
What I said was: yes that wanker over there, its his fault
I am not joking mes amis, Brown’s head is zis far up his own derriere
That’s, erm, not somewhere you really want to be, I don’t think…
Herr Brown’s twin proposals of a 30 second Son of the Manse silence to pray for the poor and his call for renewed fiscal stimulus –based on his Mugabrownian Financial And Recessionary Target Strategy (or M’FARTS, as it is otherwise known) receives the measured and timely response that it so richly deserves.
That, is, fantastic.
Mugabrownian Financial And Recessionary Target Strategy
M’FARTS
Brilliant!
yes, I have a childish python-esque sense of humor …sue me
Thanks Toby!
And as Mr Brown said at a recent Cabinet meeting: “Och, folks! When the other world leaders get a sniff of M’FARTS, there’ll be nae stoppin’ me!”
Allons, we will divide the British and Prussian armies like zis and the world will be MINE!
Stanislav stands for Parliament: PRESS RELEASE
Stanislav is a Huhne, but of the useful variety.
Sarkosy to Brown.
No Gordon this is the first sitting, can you please take your seat in three hours.
shouldn’t this be next week, via the back door and on his own. Well thats how he seems to sign treaties.
And much else besides.
Get zose bottles of Highland Sprin awaaaay from ‘ere…!
Vadera: Oh that bollocks on green shoots of recovery was true… Look at me! I am perfectly fine in the recession in my cusshy ministerial job. Let them eat cake!
You would though, wouldn’t you? Well, I would, anyway.
“Jackets off, everyone! Errr… except you, Shriti, if you don’t mind”
That’s if you like your balls to be cut off and stuffed up your arse.
You clearly haven’t met her!
She is not only fat, but nasty… no redeeming features whatsoever, and an arrogance befitting someone who’s actually achieved something, when in fact she was pretty junior in her old banking job. Which might explain why she got the Tube PPP so wrong…
Oh, and she is the only person I know who can shout by email…
But funny when she was sent on a leave of absence from the Treasury because of bullying
Sir Humph – I was thinking of some other bulging little minx; I thus withdraw my previous comment.
TT – as an admirer of South Asian ladies, I completely understand.
BTB One of the few redeeming features of Gordo (yes, I know… but wait for it!) is that he once threw a chair at Ms Vadera! Even better than a Nokia or a computer keyboard…
Sarkosy…..
“when the music starts we run around the table to the right until the music stops, when the music stops you have to grab a chair and sit down, last one standing gets kicked out of the game.”
Lady…
“Gordon is not going to like this, he knows Sarky has been in training”
Gordon, put the cutlery back please, and we’ll say no more about it…
Gogon, ou est le Shitty bint a votre droite?
After losing their jackets in the first round of the G20 strip poker tournament, the French President asks if the lady was using marked cards.
“Hey Gordeogn – throw me the handbag of Merkel whilst she’s out of ze room. I go merde in eet! She’ll ‘ate eet!”
Like zis, I ‘old my arm and ‘voila’ in cinq minutes my deodorant, she is dry
The British have this little shit called McSnot. He acts like Hitler, what a Huhne!
Sarkozy has some impromptu practice for the EU saluting platform.
We passed upon the stair, we spoke of was and when
Although I wasn’t there, he said I was his friend
Which came as some surprise I spoke into his eye
I thought you died alone, a long long time ago
Oh no, not me
I never lost control
You’re face to face
With The Man Who Saved The World
“With the man who Sold the World”
The gang tired of the musical chairs game when Gordon kept adding more chairs and never let the music end.
Bastard.
You owe me a new keyboard – I just spluttered my White Lightning over this one.
Sums up the current fiscal lunacy perfectly, though.
“Gordon, why are you here?”
“I’m Prime Minister of Britain.”
“Really? Still?”
Off topic, but look at this wonderful tool for tracking BBC story changes:
http://www.newssniffer.co.uk/articles/207041/diff/0/1
I had to visit BBC last night and was shocked at the want-for-nothing furnishings and facilities.
Due to the credit crunch Sarkozy apologises to guests for bringing them to the EU equivalent of a “greasy spoon”.
The French for “greasy spoon” is gargote as any hoon kno.
I’m not a Hoon, that’s why I didn’t know
“Ha Ha ..non, mais non, mon ami, ze top seat is for Angela!! Ha ha”.
Oooooh gawwwwwwd. I can’t belieeeeeve I’m here. I could screeeeeeaaaam. Wait until I tell my mum.
“Zat’s eem! Zat’s ze batard ‘oo started zees ‘ole sing! get eem! Arrest eem in ze name of the low! What ees wrong with you peeple! Why does no-one do as I say!! Arrest eem , I tell you! Carla! Carla! Au secours!”
Gendarme arrives: “Good moaning!”
I was pissing by the door
When Angela comes in all hold out your arms like this and hum the ‘Dambusters’ music.
“No Gordon, we are not laughing WITH you, we are laughing AT you – you dumb shit”
Little do you realise how true that is.
“I’m sorry Gordon, but we only have 19 seats at the table, you will have to sit on the balcony.”
Sarkozy: “Gordon, it is 50 euros a head if you can’t afford it get out.”
Guido: do I win a bottle of Champagne? Good to see that while we are all roughing it the people responsible for getting us into this mess and now out of it (God help us) are cutting back on their extravagant dinners….good to see the tax payers money being well spent.
Sarkozy: Pardonez mois, Gordon mon ami, je penser la femme ete une serveuse!
Vadera: Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek!!!
Sarkozy: Quand votre femme fait l’amour, elle garde vous a pris au piège dans la garde-robe comme ceci.
Sarkozy: When your wife makes love, she keeps you trapped in the wardrobe like this.
This is the French as she is spoke in the Hongrie, non?
Vader (in David Walliams voice): I’m a lady you know.
“oh zat is really funny Gordon, show me again – so I stick my arm out like this and then its ‘I’m a little teapot…”
Sarkozy: An’ zee wall be’ind you we ‘ave in magnolia on, ‘ow you say, le woodchip. Carla, she choose zee colour scheme.
Brown – “No, the joke is on you Sarkozy – I put rohypnol in your glass and now your sweet little French bum is mine”
Watch zee curtains!!!! Ecosse Labour shits sometimes set fire to ‘em!!!!
Mauvaise Conduite Financière = Conservatives
Le plus grand connard en Angleterre = L’Inquisition
(suive a nez en cul de Ambrose Silk)
La planche financiere = ?>?>?>?>?
mémoire perdu………
L’erreur
////////////////////////////
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poupée système robotisé en différé.
fermeture
Le salaud de merde de putain = L’Inquisition = petit chien du parti socialiste
Developing – Jealous Brown sees Sarkozy make Shriti appear
Green Brown fires glance at magical French PM – still needs improvement.
Cyclops watches frog spawn green shoots.
Come and find me, my name is Macarena
Always at the party con las chicas que soy Buena
Come join me
Dance with me
And you fellows chant along with me
Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena
Que tu cuerpo es pa darle alegria y cosa Buena
Dale a tu cuerpo alegria Macarena
Hey Macarena
Monsieur Brown, ze chef has prepared your favourite starter, l’escargo de nasal.
Bon Appetite
And Merkel said “It was over Herr, not there…geddit…Herr” “Oh never mind it went down well in Austria” said Sarkozy
Sarkozy “No, no, no Gordon put your little thing away – my my that is so small it is practically inverted”
Vadera “Oh not again, he tried this at the White House the other week”
let’s screw the peasants for as much as we can before they string us up!
You’re first.
Let us toast my big nose!
And I said to Gordon….”Zis is the only fistal stimulus I know about. Just ask Carla”
Apart from your anal fistula, Gordon!
“and the deep fried mars bars are a gauche”
“And then – this is the best bit – when he put them in the DVD he found they were all region 1!!”
Sarkozy’s impersonation of Harry Worth breaks the ice, but strangely the mirrors don’t show Gordon’s reflection…
Sarkozy: Sit down Monsieur Brown, when I said Gaudy I was referring to the decor, not trying to be familiar.
oh that is a good one
Sarko. Sacre Bleu, She would be taller than me if I were not standing zis box!!
Sarkozy: Oh Obama must be joining us, here’s his butler!
Ahaha, you save the world, you superman yes? You fly next?
“Tradesman’s entrance, round zee back.”
Toilet Traders Only.
Was that Gordo or Sarko?
Ah oui Gordon, we decorate zis room wis ‘alf of ze British gold reserves, after all, it was so, ‘ow you say, cheap!!!
Sarkozy: You’re a pistol, you’re really funny. You’re really funny.
Brown: What do you mean I’m funny?
Sarkozy: It’s funny, you know. It’s a good story, how you saved the world, it’s funny, you’re a funny guy.
Brown: What do you mean, you mean the way I talk? What?
Sarkozy: It’s just, you know. You’re just funny, it’s… funny, the way you tell the story and everything.
Brown: [it becomes quiet] Funny how? What’s funny about it?
Vadera: Gordon no, You got it all wrong.
Brown [in full on McMental mode]: Oh, oh, no Vadera. He’s a big boy, he knows what he said. What did you say? Funny how?
Sarkozy: Jus…
Brown: What?
Sarkozy: Just… you know… you’re funny.
Brown: You mean, let me understand this cause, you know maybe it’s me, I’m a little fucked up maybe, but I’m funny how, I mean funny like I’m a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I’m here to fuckin’ amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
Sarkozy: Just… you know, how you tell the story, what?
Brown: No, no, I don’t know, you said it. How do I know? You said I’m funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what’s funny!
Sarkozy: [long pause] Get the fuck out of here, Gordon!
Brown: [everyone laughs] You motherfucker! I almost had him, I almost had him. You stuttering prick you. Vadera, was he shaking? I wonder about you sometimes, Nicolas. You may fold under Jackie Smith’s questioning.
Yawn, Goodfella
Well I liked it. Simon r.
Maybe that’s what that Nobel Prize story was earlier. As if HE would get a Nobel prize for Economics FFS!
Gordon thinks he’s getting the award but finds himself in a storage cupboard with a couple of SAS behind him.
Then Harriet Harman gets a call from Sarkozy.
“Gordon.. He’s gone now.”
“Gone?”
“Oui. You know gone.. These things happen. So …. he’s gone. ”
{covers mouthpiece with hand and indicates to waiter he’d like some more cheese}
“Yeah…He’s gone, and we couldn’t do nothing about it. You might not want to give him an open casket funeral though.”
“Really !” They shot him in the face?”
“Non. Its just he’s so very ugly.”
“And this is my impression of Gordon sinking…”
And this is my impression of Gordon going down.
P
Ah zed ah wood get you wiz ze whoopee cushion, did ah not? Zat is ze British humour, no?
Sarko – “Gordon did you get lost again like you did in Windsor with the Queen”
GB – “Address me as Emperor, short arse. For I have saved the world”
Sarko: And zen Gorrrrdon shows me his little dance, I zink it go like this – [sings] – NIGHT FEVER!! NIGHT FEVER!!
C’est vrai…
Mauvaise Conduite Financière = Conservatives
Espece de Hoon
Soutenus par les fonds de l’haie
= Nouveaux Travailleurs
People on the other side have been saying that Wall Street took their checkbooks down to Washington and lobbied to get the regulation they wanted rather than stricter regulation. And actually said, therefore, Congressmen were the victims of this. I’m sorry, but Wall Street was not debauching a virgin, it was paying a harlot.
Oui,
Mauvaise Conduite Financière = Conservatives
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
Repetition.
Repetition and boredom.
Well, just because the Keystone Kops couldn’t catch the gang that couldn’t shoot straight, doesn’t absolve that gang from its guilt, in not only looting the system with material intent but materially abrogating their fiduciary responsibility to their clients and the nation.
Let them eat cake!
So as to spare Vadera’s blushes Sarkozy, ever the gentleman, deploys the old line “he who smelled it, dealt it”. Brown responds with a sickly smile but secretly wonders what to do with the solid that’s landed on top of his shoe.
The big 5 US investment banking firms at the beginning of 2007 had total assets of 4.3 trillion dollars. To put that into perspective, the national budget of the United States in those years was about 3 trillion dollars. They were leveraged greater than 30 to 1. Their assets were long-term in nature, frequently quite risky, frequently illiquid, and they were financed with mostly liabilities payable on demand. Most of the managements of these institutions were completely incapable of managing the risks that their firms were assuming.
Merde.
The toilet Gordon, its over there.
Fair enough, that’s where I always do my trading.
Ah the toilet. If only the quality of my leadership could match the quality of my bowel movements.
Herr Braun…. I have, how you say, pissssed my self laughing at that NuLabList website, that dolly, so funny, so pc, seeing racism everywhere, we don’t have that problem here, we just don’t do muslim lords or black persons promoted just because of their colour, here you have to be able to do the job, not just provide votes. We are very quaint like that.
peuvent les flammes de l’Islam consommer votre style de vie dégénéré, gras hoon
Unseen, grandad is already loosening the nut above the chandelier.
Like it
“No! I thought he said croissant-neuf!”
Sarkozy : Gordon, you’ve wet your pants! Ha ha ha ha ha …
Everybody in the room except Gordon : Ha ha ha ha ha …
Mr Brown, just look at all this opulence, only your Queen would spend more than this on a banquet, no, not that prat Mandleson
Monsieur Brown, I love the photo that ze British newspapers keep publishing of you doing the ‘Heil Hitler’ salute, like zis….
Sarkozy: “Hey Gordon…do that funny thing with your jaw”
I only do blow jobs for Barry now.
Lord Kinnock (third right in picture) says: The wife thinks we should get the EU to re-do the gold leaf on the walls and doors, but I said we should just take the money and tell them we’d do it ourselves…….
Fuck me ,but zis Gordon Brun iz just as loony as our spies are reporting back to Paris.
But ee iz mad.
I offre eem a salute and little black moustache to put on pour un moment of jocularitee and straight away he must clamber sur le Bechstein and tell zee whole salon of heez plan to save zee worl’
Eh bien, and Carla, she always say he is fou as well as gai.
“No, Gordon. Over there. I wish to sit opposite Geri Halliwell.”
Vadera: Did Sarkozy just call the Prime minister a Huhne in French?
Man in Blue: Shhhh, yes, but Gordon thought it was a compliment.
Sarkozy: And you thought me and Barak had deliberately not told you about the D Day celbrations
Sarkozy is laughing at gordons new t-shirt.
no
O/T and following the ‘seen elsewhere’ link to ‘Westminster’s Dirty Little Secret’ well no secret really but……Wheeeeeeeeeere’s Jacqui!
Vaz in a wig, cracks up at Zarkozy’s wit.
“…said the bishop to the actress.”
Brown remains dour at Sarkozy’s offer to get some practice in for Strictly Come Dancing.
Sarkozy uses Compiegne railway carriage to gleefully accept the Führer’s surrender of his country’s last little bit of sovereignty to the EU.
OT – Saint O’Bummer loses his halo.
Barry is in deep shit for likening his bowling skills to someone at the Special Olympics. Link: Telegraph
Grovelling apologies followed. Ha bloody ha.
I thought you said this new right shit was working Gordon!
Now I have a nation-wide strike on my hands, count yourself lucky the English are so easily cowed.
Mr Bean insults veterans AGAIN!!
http://subrosa-blonde.blogspot.com/
Vive Le Difference!
I am under this table, and I would like to remind everyone that I am a complete Hoon. Thank you very… oh fuck, do I smell piss? Not again, Gordon!
Hoon are you calling a cnut?
Hey, zis ‘okey cokey is utteerrr crap.
Sarky to Shriti: I’ll have my coffee strong, no milk, one sugar.
After Gordon demonstrates his Girls Aloud routine, Sarkosy takes the chance to show the others how his Take That dance is progressing
It is amposseeble zat I dine wiz zis Jonah personajh.All of you, leesen to me! Ze reesks of dining with zis man are eemonce! It will be noro veeroose for al of us! He is ze keesse of death, I tell you..ze KEESE OF DEATH!
I neely peese in my knickairs when read zis!! A leetle beet of oui come out.
After ze viagra, zat is what my Dago wife sees in ze bedroom.
No zee can’t do a visit to Renault.
there was an Englishman, Irishman, Welshman and One Eyed Scotsman. and hte Englishman said the trouble with political jokes is that they get elected.
Sarko,
“Thats him Thats the knob head who said he saved the world, everyone laugh at him”
Sarozky: Merkel told me that you liked this sort of thing, Gordon.
Man in foreground: “Just give me a little feel!”
Sarkozy: Nom de Dieu de putain de bordel de merde de saloperies de connards d’enculé de ta mère. It’s like wiping your ass with silk Gordon, I love it.
I can see the size of your stimulus package from here you dirty bastard.
The most surreal moment of Alistair Darling’s session in front of the Commons Treasury Select Committee came when the soft-spoken Labour MP Jim Cousins said: “Chancellor, if you are going to lead us into this Temple of Doom I think the British people will be looking to you to behave a little bit more like Indiana Jones.”
Mr Darling’s mouth opened and then closed. His eyebrows, which have been trimmed but still look like giant black caterpillars, just ones with recent haircuts, shot up. The room tittered.
I tried to imagine Mr Darling, hat askew, shirt open, racing across a rope bridge. Simply not possible. I could only see him as Edinburgh Jones, wearing a suit (trouser legs rolled up), creeping along, each eyebrow fastened to the bridge by bungee jump cables. Behind him crawled an army of aides, with binders.
Do caterpillars have haircuts?
Moi stimulous package is considerowbly bigger than yown.
Sarko: Ah ‘ave ‘erd storiez of your laaarge fisty stimulus from La Dame Mandy and ‘ave no wish to go zere!
Wee-smelling Jocko: I decorated this table with my nasal flora
McDoom: I tell you it can work!
Sarcaustic: Non my leetle Scotish tete de merde, ze wife swop idea of yours is impossible. On ze other hand if you were to allow me to leeft your kilt as did Obama,the Republic of France would be more zan’appy to ram ze idea home..
Gordon glad to see you, hope your not pissed off with me sacking Mandelson for incompetence.
Gordo :- Not a jot, he was happy with the backhanders (Oooer missus) and the pension sorted the rest. He also sleepwalked into a huge payoff with really no achievements other than being a caught out MP. A lot like Keith Vaz, you know not nice and very dim – we call him 5 watt.
Sarkozy:- Sacre blue ou est la fenetre. J’iame Davi les deux fils aux yeux d’une renarde
Just had a peep at Draper’s site – couldn’t resist it. What a bucket of shit. I hope you humiliate him good and proper on the Daily Politics. Wipe that smug grin off his bloated greasy face. The lying, fat fucking Huhne.
Sarko: “And let us not forget that Gordon will be giving us each a commemorative DVD of the occasion. It won’t be the wrong region though, like the ones Barack gave you, will it? Gordon? What are you doing with that mobile phone Gordon?”
Young lady: Is he really saying I can be the table dancer?
Man beside her: Yes; spread your legs for G20.
Sarko: You made HER a fucking Baroness? For God’s sake you fucking nutter, why??
Wee Jock Poo Pong McPlop: She said “green shoots” and I got all excited, and Queenie thought we could spin “Baroness Vadera” into “Lord Vader”
Vader: Don’t be too proud of this technological terror you’ve constructed. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Force. I find your lack of faith quite disturbing.
Well she does have two large assets in her favour.
Vadera gets in by telling them that she’s Scary Spice
psycho-shriti-sarko
And I claim my prize
“Nice meal Sarky, I would have liked to bring a few veterans over with me but they would feel out of place in such an opulent building, better we keep it for ourselves and just let the Riff Raff do the sacrifice bit. They know how to do that sort of thing better than us.
Wheres that bloody Cognac bottle gone.”
“Monsieur scotch Brown, look the guests are not sitting down.
ziz better next time to do ze fistal stimulus after ze diner, non? “
Gordon, come back to this table when you have actually been elected, just like me!
Ye bastards! Ye Scunners! Ye’ain green shoots grew intae sumthun!
Mind ye – nuthen’s ma fult ye understand!
Sarko – But -Gordon where’s your sense of humour ? Even the Chinese do not agree with you
Sarkozy…”ok people all of you who have been elected on this side…..gordon you sit over there with the staff oh and Angela and I will work out the bill, maths doesn’t seem to one of your strengths….bit like bathing and brushing….nahh just kidding…..not!.”
Hey guys, fancy a bowl in my back yard? Window lickers need not apply.
o/t but…
Government cash must be used for new mortgages claims expert
What? Instead of allowing the Dunce of the Manse to give it away as bonuses to his favoured City mates?
Sarkozy:- “No, I dont want to split the bill 7 ways. You had a starter and an extra sweet.
Gordon told Sarkozy earlier that he is taking a leaf out of President Obama’s book and appearing on a popular British TV chat show to get his message out to the public before the crucial G20 Meeting.
An aide who has visted Britain has just told Sarkozy who exactly Jeremy Kyle is.
…and Gordon was doing this under the table with his left hand. When he had counted to 99, he changed hands!
I ‘ave been told by many Mr Brown, zat you are, ‘ow you say, ‘special’.
Nappy changing room first on left
OT – more text lost off the left hand side
Looks like your ‘g’ key is missing too.
join me as i celebrate the launch of my new book.
Fucking idiots, we put them all out of work and they still believe us when we say there will be green shoots
champagne for everybody!
Sarkozy: Gordon I understand the Hungarian PM has offered to resign in view of his falling popularity in the polls over his handling of the financial crisis hitting his country – le couillon ! Where would we all be if we followed him ?
For you Gordon, ze economy is over.
Brilliant!
As the night wore on the assembled members all gave Gordon the famous G20 sign of confidence – touching their forefinger to their thumb and shaking their hand up and down vigorously.
non, non, this is not all for you, your Mon. Derek Simpson is hiring this room while in France.
o/t but are labourpist having an outward bound team bonding session somewhere?
So Gordon you fell for my cunning trick of saying Obama is attending the 65th anniversary of D Day. 10 minutes you announced you were going.
Pity you forgot about the Veterans. I heard they are going to snub you at the dias salute by looking the opposite way. What a cock…..
Is Gordon now what they call “soiled goods”?
Gordon have you heard the one about you being the best PM ever. Laugh I nearly coughed up a lung. Mon Dieu….
Have you heard the one about the new French battle tank, 1 forward gear, 5 reverse. Goes like Mandelson on a Brazilian.
Priceless !!!!!
You still haven’t got a winning entry then?
How about: “Apres moi, le deluge.”
NBEWS FROM SCOTLAND, Stanislav’s Blues
HAHAHAHH Une HOON
Alors, Monsieur Brun – voici la creme anglaise, vert naturalement, pour ta tete.
Apres la press conferance Le Hoon deluges his pantalons
” Zat woman! She ‘ave a knife! When is arrive ze Snakebite?”
Brown: British soldiers used to wear red uniforms, so that when they were wounded in battle the sight of blood would not demoralise the troops.
Sarkozy: Is zat why you are wearing ze brown trousers?
Sarko: When we av finished fleecing ze taxpayers we can pull up ze drawbridges, like zis, and let the fuckers freeze in ze dark!
Bankster Buddies: Hahahaha!
Ah Meester Brown, I ‘ ere zat as ever, you’ve started ze quantitative easing wizout us.
I ‘ear zat 30% of Britons vill still vote for you Gordon. I know each coontray ‘az it’s fair share of de simpletons, but WTF?
I can reveal where Monsewer Braun keeps his Moral Compass, it is up his Moral Arsehole.
zeig heil von braun!
I instinctively know Gordon Brown is one of the few individuals who you could not knock any sense into.
Even several kickings to the plumbs and the anus in polished shoes would not cause him to question himself for a moment, even a soldering iron up the jap’s would only strengthen his resolve
Gordon has got to be allowed self destruct, his own negative energy will implode himself, watch him do it, stephen hawkings could write about it
Is a crying shame the tool is probably under suicide watch in his bunker.
In all ze gin palaces in all ze world, you ‘ave to walk into mine you Huhne.
I ‘ear zat 30% of Britons vill still vote for you Mr Brown. Everay nation ‘az it’s fair share of ze simpletons, but WTF?
Shitzy Veedera get out! I am ze only dwarf in ze village.
Ich bien eine retard.
Fair enough.
Zeig heil Herr Braun! You ‘ave succeeded ware ‘itler failed, and brought Perfidious Albion to it’s knees. Tomorrow ze world!
M.Sarkozy, this is Shrity Vadeera.
Ahh, your famous eenglish sense of ‘umour non?
Nokia should rebound during the G19.5
The BBC are Huhnes.
GB: I look down on you, because I have a bigger stimulus package than you, but I look up to Barry because he has a bigger stimulus package than either of us.
Sarko: I’ve got a stiff neck.
GB: Give me the tools and I will do the job.
S: But M. Brown, surely you ‘ave already consulted your Cabinet?
MAIL ON SUNDAY
Minister’s £60,000 expenses for parents’ home: ‘Rumbled’ Tony McNulty drops claim… then calls for it to be curtailed.
Another Labour Minister has been caught out in an expenses scandal after effectively admitting he had been wrong to claim £60,000 of taxpayers’ money for a property which is his parents’ main home – not his.
OINK OINK! RESIGN!!!!!
City Minister pockets £200,000 from Bermudian tax dodge company
Lord Myners is facing questions today about a business he set up in the tax haven Bermuda – just as Western governments are cracking down on such arrangements.
Do as he says, not as he does.
Labour schools backer quits after taxpayer cash ends up in his charity
Labour’s flagship academies scheme is in disarray after a leading backer was forced to resign over
Financial misconduct =
Oh.
Doesn’t the Inquisitive one work weekends?
Labour at war as Blairites launch plot to parachute poll guru’s daughter, 22, in to safe seat
A feud has broken out between supporters of Tony Blair and Gordon Brown over a bid to shoehorn the 22-year-old daughter of one of the ex-PM’s advisers into a plum Labour seat.
Anger over Gordon Brown’s five-star ‘jamboree’ to Chile
Gordon Brown was under fire last night for ‘jetting off’ to an international Left-wing jamboree at a top South American resort while UK unemployment soars.
Not another leftie wankfest FFS? We have enough of that in the EU.
Lord Mandelson spawns new spin empire
The business secretary has racked up a £2m-a-year wages bill for his empire of media consultants and public relations advisers
“We’ve got to give him a chance to think up a plausible excuse.”
“Another Labour Minister has been caught out in an expenses scandal after effectively admitting he had been wrong to claim £60,000 of taxpayers’ money for a property which is his parents’ main home – not his.
OINK OINK! RESIGN!!!!!”
Haven’t you heard? Labour have removed’ RESIGN’ from the lexicon.
Who gives a fuck, with the billions in my control £2m is mere chicken feed!
‘jerking off’ surely.
Hey, left margin fixed on IE7! (and IE6, one presumes). I hope all those thousands of people who say Guido is a prat will retract immediately.
“flagship academies”? Surely ‘opportunities for local crooks to cream off the taxpayer’!
There’s a BBC in Albanian on my money
The ****s the total ****ing ****s
I don’t ****ing believe it, ****ing Albanian
jesus ****ing wept – give me my ****ing money back
why????? is there BBC in ****ing albanian on my ***ing money
No fuck!
fuck yes….
Byeeeeeeeeeee
RIP
Saint Jade of Goody beckons.
She died on Mother’s Day. How – er – suspicious is that?
I demand an enquiry.
Who killed Jade?
Typical chav mum, drops 2 kids then fucks off.
I see McDoom is once again commenting on how wonderful it was of Jade to raise money to give her children a better start in life than herself. I thought he hates private schools. He should have been castigating her for buying privileges not available to all. Never mind if, by chance, they happen to get good qualifications he’ll do all he can to make sure they don’t get to a decent university.
WE WILL NEVER FORGET YOU JANE GOODY
Who?
Guido,
Well done on the win yesterday. Is that the reason for no blog?
Fuck off you spaz.
OMG NO!! She woz such a lovin and carin person, a real ledge, a star, an exampl to us al. She was Posh and Muvva Terreeza rapped up in 1.
OMG I fink im gonna end it all meself.
OMG
Yea, a reel ledge woz Jade. I fink Im gonna send her poor lil boyz a big bunch of flowers so they dont starve
Shes gon, not wiv us anymore!! OMG!!!XXXX!!!!xxxx
((
“Former minister Nigel Griffiths, a close friend of Prime Minister Gordon Brown, cavorted with a naked brunette in his Parliamentary office on Remembrance Day. ”
The real shocker here is that 1.the guy likes women and 2.gordon has a friend.
2> Gordon has a ‘friend’ who like women.
“Britain’s ambassador in Washington, Nigel Sheinwald, has delivered a diplomatic but decisive rebuke to Barack Obama’s refusal to give Gordon Brown a full-scale Press conference at their White House meeting two weeks ago.
Sheinwald has written to bosses at America’s Fox TV – which led a campaign protesting at Obama’s behaviour – warmly thanking them for standing up for the PM.” Black Dog Mail on Sunday21 March 2009
He’s got another friend too it seems ! Obviously that gift of the Blockbuster DVD Box Set still rankles although rumour has it that Downing Street are planning to present Obama with a reciprocal DVD Set of Coronation Street and East Enders when he calls in April
All hail ze Obamassiah!
http://scattershooting.files.wordpress.com/2008/11/change-hitler-obama-lenin.jpg
He thinks I’m special.
More lies and cover-ups from NuLab
gordon has a friend??????????????????
He’s invisible.
Sarkozy “And then McNulty said Let them eat cake. The stupid taxpayers deserve to be ripped off and pay for my parents living in my other house.”
Gordim “But the best thing was he did nothing wrong”.
——————
Email him here House of Commons: mcnultyt@parliament.uk
I suspect the servers will crash
—
Comment
Piano wire sales up 500%.
Nu labour seats forecast @ next election ~50.
McNulty replies
“I don’t accept that. This is my standard reply to any question that has facts that don’t suit the spin. So if I can just reiterate..I don’t accept that”
I simply do not accept that.
Unless the question is, “Would you like some more money?”
“Mon ‘overcraft est full of asylum seekers!”
Everayboday out except ze asian bint, I need to inject zome liquidity.
And zen she say “If you call me Brunilda – I call you Nicholastic Sarcastic.’”
Sarkozy: are we go to eat ze chocolate starfish that Monsieur Mandelson has told me so much about?
coffee all over self! dammit, but perfectly formed!
Doesn’t the lovely Tony McNulty know what happens to looters?
Yeah, they get 50″ plasmas for gratis.
David Mitchell (who?) thinks we’re too rude.
MP’s ‘FIDDLING” while Rome burns…
Hmm, you forgot to preface that with KIDDY.
Kiddy MP’s ‘FIDDLING” while Rome burns…
Jade Goody has died of cancer of the Huhne.
Nice article by the snot eating coward on CIF 300+ comments all bad bordering on abuse….go add to the fun.
Looks like McTwat is preparing to cancel the election.
Linky thingy
Apropos Terrorism – Jacqui Smith was interviewed by Jon Sopel on BBC Politics Show this lunchtime and in between all her claptrap alongside Gordo’s “Smoke and mirrors” vigilance distraction she was asked by Sopel if the people demonstrating against the Troops march in Luton were extremists ? “That’s not the point,” she replied, “what the British people want to know is that where the law is broken the offenders will be arrested and dealt with via the Courts!” “Yes but”, said Sopel “the two people arrested were actually demosnstrating against those with placards and none of those that were holding up offending posters were actually arrested at all !” “Exactly!” said Jacqui “but you’re missing the point entirely” You couldn’t make it up !!!!!
Like this one
SWEETIEPIE
22 Mar 09, 12:35am (about 14 hours ago)
I hope no one is planning to fly soon, as I guess Brown thinks it’s time to surround Heathrow with tanks again.
PLEASE give it a rest, Mr Brown! We are not fools. We all realise that you are invoking the threat of a terrorist attack to make people think twice about demonstrating at the G20, but it won’t work. The whole world is about to see how much we despise you and your government!
indrossi
22 Mar 09, 1:17am (about 14 hours ago)
Lies, spurious lies. I, like many others reading this, feel patronised by the arrogance of your arguments. The presumption of our allegiance to your cause.
You have kidnapped and tortured foreigners.
You have overthrown governments to secure strategic advantages.
You have destroyed entire countries only to seek profit from their reconstruction.
You have lied to your own population to encourage a war of aggression.
There isn’t a damn thing you can say that will redeem you.
Guido’s away, obviously. See Snotty’s diary at,
http://oldrightie.blogspot.com/2009/03/snotty-diary-entry.html
Aye bastards! Ye Scunners!
But, thanks tae’ ur’ long term stratgey, – an’ Mz. J Boot, we’ve got far mae terroists than ye ‘ave!
Take that!!
Mind ye, nuthen’s’nae ma fult ye understand!
Another building society is getting into difficulties:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/scotland/7957756.stm
Don’t think it will be the last, either. There’s no incentive to save any more, and nobody in their right mind is going to spend their savings knowing there are another million job losses around the corner and huge tax rises on the way. I’ve pulled £25K out of my local society in the last week to invest elsewhere, as far as I’m concerned UK banks and building societies just aren’t worth bothering with any more.
Another Scottish financial business fucked…..surely not
deep fried pizzas all round.
“Concern has been raised over the future of Scotland’s largest building society, amid reports it may have to be bailed out by the UK Government.”
hmmmm………”it started Scotland”
Let me put ze ozzer eye out
If Guido can’t be arsed come to :
SUNDAY WITH STANISLAV, Stanislav’s Blues
Do we get a free pizza?
Bastards.
If Guido can’t be arsed come to:
SUNDAY WITH STANISLAV, Stanislav’s Blues
Bastards.
” Beurre de Shriti Monsieur le Président?”
I think Sarkozy’s about to start a dance-off
Ag-a-doo-doo-doo, push pineapple, shake the tree
Aga-doo-doo-doo, push pineapple, grind coffee
To the left, to the right, jump up and down and to the knees
Come and dance every night, sing with a hula melody
Shriti:
I liked the toasted rat’s anus, but there could have been more stuffing.
Sarko:
I like my anus well stuffed too.
El Gordo:
It was divine, but nothing beats the crunchy texture and earthy taste of a freshly picked snotter.
The winner IMHO.
Aye, man, you’ve gotta eat yer greens!
did I win?
Sarkozy:”Don’t worry Gordon…I took the batteries out of Carla’s Stimulator-Fiscal before leaving for London”
Gordo “you are a one eyed Scottish idiot”
When are you going to announce the winner? It’s Tuesday already. Please stop calling it ‘Friday Caption Competition’ unless you want to be done under the Trades Description Act 1968.