Our Gordon, who art in Number 10
Hallowed be thy mental illness
Thy party conference come
Thy will be done, in Manchester as it is Westminster
Give us this day our daily policy
And forgive us our requests for nomination papers, as we forgive them that nominated you previously
And lead us not into Toryland
But deliver us from election wipe out
For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever and ever.

Amen

Via a co-conspirator