A claret enhanced co-conspirator emails:

I am sure you will be delighted to learn that one of the highlights of the Crewe campaign was seeing Quentin Davies canvassing the streets of Crewe on Tuesday. In his immaculate Saville Row suit he looked both uncomfortable and ridiculous as he banged doors in Oxford Street – an area of Crewe which bears zero resemblance to its London namesake.

I particularly enjoyed drawing my car up beside him and shouting “Labour Toff” – which was met with a bemused grin somewhat akin to that of someone feeling the effects of perhaps 2 bottles of claret at lunch!

Skipping along behind him was little Ben Bradshaw – who with his numerous Labour badges and neat little back-pack bore a remarkable resemblance to some sort of serial trainspotter.

Quentin, it is too late to go back…