Surprisingly, knowing the mindset of co-conspirators, they voted not to give tax relief to farting and shitting, but to not having children.

Guido of course being a good and fertile Catholic is not impressed with the no-children Green tax credit idea, but it does have a certain anti-humanity, Green ideological logic consistency to it. Perhaps Huhne or Zac will take up the idea…

If AntiCitizenOne is not too paranoid to email in with his address, his prize will be sent to him by return.

Just got back from lunch. On the table next to me was a denim clad Carol Thatcher. Obviously Guido listened in to her conversation. She was drinking rosé with a younger Latino, possibly South American guy, bemoaning the tax man. “No the money in Switzerland is in my own name” was the tone of the conversation. Out of respect for her mother and a shared loathing for the Inland Revenue, Guido will leave it at that. She definitely has no luck with men – she split the bill…

Political correspondents can breathe a collective sigh of relief. As we exit the substance desert that was the silly season they can now start writing “party split” stories.

Keith Vaz, a former minister for Europe, is calling for a referendum on the European constitution that Jim Murphy, the current minister for Europe says isn’t a constitution, just a bit of administrative tidying up. The FCO traditionally lies for its country, Murphy is lying for a foreign superstate. Blunkett says a referendum was promised and Miliband says Labour is not split. Super…

Gummer is getting a kicking from John Redwood saying basically that the mad burger-eater will damage the economy with his Green taxes and plans for increasing airport congestion. Cameroonie sources are briefing that they won’t pay much attention to the loopier ideas from Zac and Gummer. Fantastic…

So we have splits, splitters and lots of easy copy ahead of the party conferences. Cynics among you might wonder if the splits haven’t just been teased out by the media to manufacture a storyline, the Sun (Vaz article) and GMTV (Redwood interview) can take the credit for getting it going. The show must go on…