C4 Political Awards : No Totty Report

Harriet Harman was gutted not to win, Charles Clarke is clearly embittered and laughed heartily at the expense of his enemies colleagues. Charlie Kennedy ostentatiously drunk a Coca Cola, mind you he did leave early, (keeps the Tennents Extra at home obviously).

Sandra Howard charmed Mrs Fawkes, whatever happened to her husband? Aitken played up his ex-con status amusingly. Event was otherwise lacking in senior Tories who were all at the Black and White Ball, only Dominic Grieve showed up in incongruous black tie before he hopped off to Battersea.

Jon Snow was surprisingly bad at reading his auto-cue and we were repeatedly asked to clap and laugh a second time at his fluffed jokes. The live link to the Tory Ball with Cameron was a needle match. Snow couldn’t hide his loathing and made a jibe about tickets to the ball costing £5,000.* Cameron (through a gritted smile) retorted “Well on your salary Jon that wouldn’t be a problem”. Wonder if that will be cut?

*Was actually £325 on Guido’s invite. 325 quid to spend an evening with Tories? Guido might charge that to spend a night with the Tories, but not a hope in hell of paying it.

Lashed, for No Honours

Guido got hammered celebrating with Brian Haw at the Channel 4 Political Awards, then went on to the alternative Tory not-the-300-quid-a-ticket do at the Collection.

Ended up helping the police with their enquiries at about 3.30am. No charges resulted, but Guido will confirm that “I am a personal friend of Commander Yates” works a lot better* than “Do you know who I am?”. Guido would like to thank the officers concerned for dropping Guido off at home in the back of their van and confirm that another donation to the The Metropolitan & City Police Orphanage and Orphans Fund is on the way.

*Does not work on Mrs Fawkes at 4am.



Tip offs: 0709 284 0531
team@Order-order.com

Quote of the Day

Jean-Claude Juncker:

“We will never let the Greek people down. And we know the Greek people don’t want to let down the European Union.”

Top Posts This Week

Guidogram: Sign up

Subscribe to the most succinct 7 days a week daily email read by thousands of Westminster insiders.

Facebook

Owen Jones Gets Owned Owen Jones Gets Owned
Read Sajid Javid Speech Slamming CBI Read Sajid Javid Speech Slamming CBI
Watch: BBC3 Greatest Hits Watch: BBC3 Greatest Hits
LORD DEBEN’S CLIMATE ALARMISM LORD DEBEN’S CLIMATE ALARMISM
WATCH: Terror Training Exercise in London WATCH: Terror Training Exercise in London
Meet the Next Generation of Troughing MPs Meet the Next Generation of Troughing MPs

Boris on £275,000 at Telegraph Boris on £275,000 at Telegraph
Supercar Socialist Polly Toynbee Supercar Socialist Polly Toynbee
Read CPS Janner Statement in Full Read CPS Janner Statement in Full
UKIP Broke, Homeless UKIP Broke, Homeless
Doctors: Capitalism ‘Conflicts With Health and Public Interest’ Doctors: Capitalism ‘Conflicts With Health and Public Interest’
Gates: Capitalism Innovates to Save Planet Gates: Capitalism Innovates to Save Planet
Guido’s Column Guido’s Column
Awkward Ed Miliband Moments: Nick Clegg Edition Awkward Ed Miliband Moments: Nick Clegg Edition
Man Beheaded in France, Islamist Flag Found Man Beheaded in France, Islamist Flag Found
GREENPEACE DUPE SUPPORTERS INTO THINKING THEY OWNED HEATHROW PROTEST PLOT GREENPEACE DUPE SUPPORTERS INTO THINKING THEY OWNED HEATHROW PROTEST PLOT
Cameron’s Broken EU Promise Cameron’s Broken EU Promise
Suzanne and UKIP Make Up Suzanne and UKIP Make Up
Labour Establishment Stitch Up Corbyn Labour Establishment Stitch Up Corbyn