Thursday, February 8, 2007

C4 Political Awards : No Totty Report

Harriet Harman was gutted not to win, Charles Clarke is clearly embittered and laughed heartily at the expense of his enemies colleagues. Charlie Kennedy ostentatiously drunk a Coca Cola, mind you he did leave early, (keeps the Tennents Extra at home obviously).

Sandra Howard charmed Mrs Fawkes, whatever happened to her husband? Aitken played up his ex-con status amusingly. Event was otherwise lacking in senior Tories who were all at the Black and White Ball, only Dominic Grieve showed up in incongruous black tie before he hopped off to Battersea.

Jon Snow was surprisingly bad at reading his auto-cue and we were repeatedly asked to clap and laugh a second time at his fluffed jokes. The live link to the Tory Ball with Cameron was a needle match. Snow couldn’t hide his loathing and made a jibe about tickets to the ball costing £5,000.* Cameron (through a gritted smile) retorted “Well on your salary Jon that wouldn’t be a problem”. Wonder if that will be cut?

*Was actually £325 on Guido’s invite. 325 quid to spend an evening with Tories? Guido might charge that to spend a night with the Tories, but not a hope in hell of paying it.

Lashed, for No Honours

Guido got hammered celebrating with Brian Haw at the Channel 4 Political Awards, then went on to the alternative Tory not-the-300-quid-a-ticket do at the Collection.

Ended up helping the police with their enquiries at about 3.30am. No charges resulted, but Guido will confirm that “I am a personal friend of Commander Yates” works a lot better* than “Do you know who I am?”. Guido would like to thank the officers concerned for dropping Guido off at home in the back of their van and confirm that another donation to the The Metropolitan & City Police Orphanage and Orphans Fund is on the way.

*Does not work on Mrs Fawkes at 4am.


Seen Elsewhere

Osborne’s Daycare Obsession is a Time Bomb | Kathy Gyngell
BBC Marr Pinko Trying to Ban the Queen | Speccie
Eric Hobsbawm: Companion of Dishonour | Standpoint
Guido Party Gossip | Iain Dale
Russell Brand Comes Out as 9/11 Truther | Guardian
Health Revolution is Underway | Fraser Nelson
UKIP Gets Professional | Red Box
Kelly Tolhurst Wins Rochester Open Primary | BBC
No.10 Ambushed by EU Prosperity Tax | Times
10 Years of Guido | Iain Dale
Tory MP Tells Leftie Jon Snow to Retire | Guardian


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Rob Colvile reviews Russell Brand’s new book:

“Oddly, the person I feel sorriest for isn’t Brand himself – although he certainly comes across as a rather pitiable figure, projecting his own brokenness on to the world around him – but Johann Hari. Drummed out of Fleet Street for plagiarism, the former Independent columnist has washed up as “my mate Johann, who’s been doing research for this book”. For a genuinely talented polemicist, it would have been a humbling experience to have to treat this sub-undergraduate dross as the scintillating wisdom of a philosopher-king.”



Mycroft says:

Have you read the last bit of Animal Farm?

You know where the animals are looking through the Farmhouse window?

My TV screen was that window at lunch-time today.

Be careful, the sudden self-congratulatory tone, the slightly pudgy outline of indulgence and you become exactly what you should despise.

The jolly face of the Quisling Cameron poses for your camera has mesmerised and deceived you, you who were once not so deceived.

You were no firebrand, you were a damp squib in my opinion, sorry.

You need a damned good kick up the ahse!


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