Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Sir Michael White Gives Prezza Soft Soap

The Guardian’s Michael White was chosen to provide the outlet for Prezza’s mea culpa this morning. Now why could that be? Why was Michael White favoured out of all the journalists in the lobby?

ont>Guido is not one of those wingnuts who decries all Guardianistas as leftie, anti-American, moonbat al Qaeda fellow-travellers, they clearly are not and produce some of the best serious journalism. So shouldn’t White be embarrassed that his colleagues disrespectfully call him “Sir Michael” behind his back, mock his windbag questions and think he is the government’s patsy? Did he imagine all those years ago when he was young and hungry that one day he’d be seen as an establishment mouthpiece?

When Prescott and Blair go it will be time for White to collect his pension, there are plenty of Guardian journalists willing to “speak truth to power” rather than write excuses for those in power.

nt> t>See previous. >

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Razzall Gone Out of Lib Dems’ Campaigns

Unconfirmed rumour that the splendidly named Baron Razzall is out as Chair of the Liberal Democrats’ Campaigns and Communications Committee. Will miss him just because he had a name that sparkled.

Source couldn’t say if he jumped or was pushed, the LibDems flatline local election results would suggest the latter. Any insights co-conspirators? Email Guido.

UPDATE : Confirmed in the comments (can there be anything more reliable in politics than this blog’s comments) that Baron Razzall is now Ming the Mumbler’s personal spin-meister. That will keep him busy. Very busy.

UPDATE : Cowley Street press office professionalism demonstrated by conversation with co-conspirator “Can you confirm that Lord Razzall has been sacked?” other end hesitates, says what sounds like “uh, yeah” and then says “I’ll have to get back to you on that one”.

Nigel Evans, All-Party Groupie

With recess upon us MPs can jaunt off on a foreign freebie courtesy of some obscure All-Party Group. The travel is one of the great side benefits of being a member of parliament and MPs do manage to turn up in very strange places. Some years back Guido was in Angola with anti-Marxist freedom fighters during that country’s bloody civil war. Deep in the bush back from the frontline with my AK-47 carrying friends we met up with another unit of rebels who had, much to my surprise, two posh English MPs with them dressed in full safari outfits. It was a bit like something out of White Mischief, but at least they had some whisky.

So who is the King / Queen of All Party Groups currently? It looks like Nigel Evans could lay claim to that title:

All-Party Parliamentary Ukraine Group – Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Malaysia Group – Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Identity Fraud – Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Export Group – Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Advertising – Vice Chair
UK-Egypt All-Party Parliamentary Group – Vice Chair
UK-Bahrain All-Party Parliamentary Group -
All-Party Parliamentary Botswana Group – Vice Chair
Associate Parliamentary Manufacturing Industry Group – Vice Chr
All-Party Parliamentary Leisure Group – Vice Chair
All-Party British-Turkish Parliamentary Group – Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Group for Small Shops – Vice Chair
Occupational Safety and Health All-Party Parliamentary Group – Secretary
Parliamentary Space Committee – Treasurer
All-Party British-North Korea Parliamentary Group – Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Sports Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Channel Islands Group – Treasurer
All-Party Parliamentary British-Qatar Group – Treasurer
All-Party Parliamentary Theatre Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Music Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Nigeria – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Historic Vehicles Group – Treasurer
All-Party Parliamentary Beer Group – Vice Chair
British Council Associate Parliamentary Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Vietnam Group – Joint Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Cuba – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Drugs Misuse Group – Vice-Chairs
Indo-British All-Party Parliamentary Group – Membership Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Retail Industry Group – Vice-Chairs
Associate Parliamentary Group on Serbia and Montenegro – Vice chair

That is a hell of a lot of committee meetings to attend as an executive officer. On top of that he is an ordinary member of 69 (at the last count) other All-Party Groups. How he finds the time to attend them all, particularly when he has to fly off on so many resultant overseas freebies, is baffling. The list of junkets he has been on goes on for pages (he is not shy of freebie upgrades either). Guido can’t help but feel that he is putting himself about a bit too much for the voters of the Ribble Valley.

Most surprising to Guido was the declared complimentary membership of Stringfellows lapdancing club. Obviously Nigel will be supporting Guido’s Campaign for Sir Peter Stringfellow.

Rickitt’s Wit and Wisdom

The Torygraph is reporting that Adam Rickitt has applied for Michael Howard’s old safe seat. Adam is getting a lot of stick as the A-list’s ingenue “mincing metrosexual” par excellence. Guido has to his surprise had a few emails, from people who should know, saying that this is being unfair.

Guido is admittedly judging Adam on the basis of his single Question Time appearance and his pop video, which may not be representative. Certainly his QT analysis of Rwanda’s plight – ‘tootsies vs hootsies’ - suggested his foreign affairs knowledge was a little shaky. Having asked around however, a few people insist he is as smart as he is pretty.

Guido fears his first impression might be like judging Ronald Reagan on his appearance in Bedtime for Bonzo. So can any co-conspirators send Guido evidence of Adam’s wit and wisdom, his political judgement, any issue based campaigns he has been attached to, any evidence of political activism? What exactly is on his political CV? Adam, what have you got to say for yourself?

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

New Tasteful Alastair Campbell Auction Fundraiser

Alastair Campbell is always ready to lend a hand at auctions when not signing death warrants for Dr David Kelly, sexing up dossiers and generally doing his bit. Twisted Genius Tim Ireland has a little wheeze to finance his sifting through the Labour party’s election receipts.

The manic prankster is auctioning Campbell’s telephone and fax numbers. The auction finishes next week. Don’t worry about missing it, Guido will warn you when there are 45 minutes to go.

Rebekah Takes Bit ‘o Posh to Posh ‘n Becks’ Party

Some snide and ill informed commentators claimed that Cameron’s office had gatecrashed Posh ‘n Becks party – begging them for an invite to get himself pictured with some street credible footballing heroes. Guido understands that Dave was actually the guest of Rebekah Wade. That would be the former New Labour loving Sun editor, now rapidly becoming cheerleader-in-chief for her new best friend, Dave.

Wondering where Blair is currently? Guido understands he sneaked off to suck up to Murdoch whilst in the U.S. en route to holidaying with former Italian PM Berlusconi. Don’t worry Prezza is in charge…

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Were you up for Twigg?

Guido bows to no-one in his mocking of the Cornerstone crowd of head-banging, Christian, old school Tories. Yet their latest publication (Were you up for Twigg?) seems eminently sensible – local candidates do better than A-list mincing (or otherwise) metropolitan metrosexuals foisted by CCHQ on constituencies.
Exhibit A is Andrew Rosindell, a campaigning machine in Romford, a local champion who defied the trend in 2001 winning Romford from Labour. He is “Mr Romford” in tune with his voters and viewed as a local son and “our MP”. He is as far from being an identikit A-lister as it is possible to get.

It is all very well Dave and Frankie changing the Tory party’s face, but if they really want the Tories to be more representative of Britain and in tune with their voters, maybe local candidates should be the emphasis?

Monday, May 29, 2006

Now We Know What Prezza’s SpAds Do

A few weeks ago Guido asked : “Any idea what Joan Hammell and Mick Halloran, Special Advisers to the DPM do for Prezza?” Now we know. In the case of of Joan Hammell she plays croquet with him. (See there how Guido resisted the temptation to mention balls – that would be cheap).

This could be interesting, if they get rid of Prezza, it will weaken the security of Blair’s own position. Brownite Harriet Harman’s suggestion that the next DPM must be a woman was as subtle as Prezza’s chat-up lines.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Lib Dem MP in Heterosexual Affair Shocker

It is almost boring to record that buried on page 94 of the News of the Screws today goodie-two-shoes LibDem MP Matthew Taylor admits he is at it with someone else’s wife. Remember how censorious and “holier than thou” he was about Charlie’s personal problems?


Seen Elsewhere

Can Jim Murphy Save Scottish Labour? | Guardian
There is Still Appetite for the Westminster Lunch | Jon Craig
Labour Turn Their Backs on Jewish Community | Dan Hodges
Chivalry is Not Dead | Laura Perrins
Jonathan Jones is a Tw*t | Iain Dale
Second Scotland Poll Suggests Labour Wipeout | Times
Paedo Probe Boss Urged to Quit | Sun
Keynesian Tories Won’t Eliminate Deficit | Tim Montgomerie
Whitehall Doesn’t Work | Dom Cummings
Russell Brand’s Tax Avoidance Firm | Sun
1 in 7 Young Britons Back ISIS | Times


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