Sir Michael White Gives Prezza Soft Soap

The Guardian’s Michael White was chosen to provide the outlet for Prezza’s mea culpa this morning. Now why could that be? Why was Michael White favoured out of all the journalists in the lobby?

Guido is not one of those wingnuts who decries all Guardianistas as leftie, anti-American, moonbat al Qaeda fellow-travellers, they clearly are not and produce some of the best serious journalism. So shouldn’t White be embarrassed that his colleagues disrespectfully call him “Sir Michael” behind his back, mock his windbag questions and think he is the government’s patsy? Did he imagine all those years ago when he was young and hungry that one day he’d be seen as an establishment mouthpiece?

When Prescott and Blair go it will be time for White to collect his pension, there are plenty of Guardian journalists willing to “speak truth to power” rather than write excuses for those in power.

See previous.


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Razzall Gone Out of Lib Dems’ Campaigns

Unconfirmed rumour that the splendidly named Baron Razzall is out as Chair of the Liberal Democrats’ Campaigns and Communications Committee. Will miss him just because he had a name that sparkled.

Source couldn’t say if he jumped or was pushed, the LibDems flatline local election results would suggest the latter. Any insights co-conspirators? Email Guido.

UPDATE : Confirmed in the comments (can there be anything more reliable in politics than this blog’s comments) that Baron Razzall is now Ming the Mumbler’s personal spin-meister. That will keep him busy. Very busy.

UPDATE : Cowley Street press office professionalism demonstrated by conversation with co-conspirator “Can you confirm that Lord Razzall has been sacked?” other end hesitates, says what sounds like “uh, yeah” and then says “I’ll have to get back to you on that one”.

Nigel Evans, All-Party Groupie

With recess upon us MPs can jaunt off on a foreign freebie courtesy of some obscure All-Party Group. The travel is one of the great side benefits of being a member of parliament and MPs do manage to turn up in very strange places. Some years back Guido was in Angola with anti-Marxist freedom fighters during that country’s bloody civil war. Deep in the bush back from the frontline with my AK-47 carrying friends we met up with another unit of rebels who had, much to my surprise, two posh English MPs with them dressed in full safari outfits. It was a bit like something out of White Mischief, but at least they had some whisky.

So who is the King / Queen of All Party Groups currently? It looks like Nigel Evans could lay claim to that title:

All-Party Parliamentary Ukraine Group – Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Malaysia Group – Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Identity Fraud – Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Export Group – Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Advertising – Vice Chair
UK-Egypt All-Party Parliamentary Group – Vice Chair
UK-Bahrain All-Party Parliamentary Group –
All-Party Parliamentary Botswana Group – Vice Chair
Associate Parliamentary Manufacturing Industry Group – Vice Chr
All-Party Parliamentary Leisure Group – Vice Chair
All-Party British-Turkish Parliamentary Group – Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Group for Small Shops – Vice Chair
Occupational Safety and Health All-Party Parliamentary Group – Secretary
Parliamentary Space Committee – Treasurer
All-Party British-North Korea Parliamentary Group – Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Sports Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Channel Islands Group – Treasurer
All-Party Parliamentary British-Qatar Group – Treasurer
All-Party Parliamentary Theatre Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Music Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Nigeria – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Historic Vehicles Group – Treasurer
All-Party Parliamentary Beer Group – Vice Chair
British Council Associate Parliamentary Group – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Vietnam Group – Joint Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Group on Cuba – Vice Chair
All-Party Parliamentary Drugs Misuse Group – Vice-Chairs
Indo-British All-Party Parliamentary Group – Membership Secretary
All-Party Parliamentary Retail Industry Group – Vice-Chairs
Associate Parliamentary Group on Serbia and Montenegro – Vice chair

That is a hell of a lot of committee meetings to attend as an executive officer. On top of that he is an ordinary member of 69 (at the last count) other All-Party Groups. How he finds the time to attend them all, particularly when he has to fly off on so many resultant overseas freebies, is baffling. The list of junkets he has been on goes on for pages (he is not shy of freebie upgrades either). Guido can’t help but feel that he is putting himself about a bit too much for the voters of the Ribble Valley.

Most surprising to Guido was the declared complimentary membership of Stringfellows lapdancing club. Obviously Nigel will be supporting Guido’s Campaign for Sir Peter Stringfellow.

Rickitt’s Wit and Wisdom

The Torygraph is reporting that Adam Rickitt has applied for Michael Howard’s old safe seat. Adam is getting a lot of stick as the A-list’s ingenue “mincing metrosexual” par excellence. Guido has to his surprise had a few emails, from people who should know, saying that this is being unfair.

Guido is admittedly judging Adam on the basis of his single Question Time appearance and his pop video, which may not be representative. Certainly his QT analysis of Rwanda’s plight – ‘tootsies vs hootsies’ – suggested his foreign affairs knowledge was a little shaky. Having asked around however, a few people insist he is as smart as he is pretty.

Guido fears his first impression might be like judging Ronald Reagan on his appearance in Bedtime for Bonzo. So can any co-conspirators send Guido evidence of Adam’s wit and wisdom, his political judgement, any issue based campaigns he has been attached to, any evidence of political activism? What exactly is on his political CV? Adam, what have you got to say for yourself?

New Tasteful Alastair Campbell Auction Fundraiser

Alastair Campbell is always ready to lend a hand at auctions when not signing death warrants for Dr David Kelly, sexing up dossiers and generally doing his bit. Twisted Genius Tim Ireland has a little wheeze to finance his sifting through the Labour party’s election receipts.

The manic prankster is auctioning Campbell’s telephone and fax numbers. The auction finishes next week. Don’t worry about missing it, Guido will warn you when there are 45 minutes to go.

Rebekah Takes Bit ‘o Posh to Posh ‘n Becks’ Party

Some snide and ill informed commentators claimed that Cameron’s office had gatecrashed Posh ‘n Becks party – begging them for an invite to get himself pictured with some street credible footballing heroes. Guido understands that Dave was actually the guest of Rebekah Wade. That would be the former New Labour loving Sun editor, now rapidly becoming cheerleader-in-chief for her new best friend, Dave.

Wondering where Blair is currently? Guido understands he sneaked off to suck up to Murdoch whilst in the U.S. en route to holidaying with former Italian PM Berlusconi. Don’t worry Prezza is in charge…

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Were you up for Twigg?

Guido bows to no-one in his mocking of the Cornerstone crowd of head-banging, Christian, old school Tories. Yet their latest publication (Were you up for Twigg?) seems eminently sensible – local candidates do better than A-list mincing (or otherwise) metropolitan metrosexuals foisted by CCHQ on constituencies.
Exhibit A is Andrew Rosindell, a campaigning machine in Romford, a local champion who defied the trend in 2001 winning Romford from Labour. He is “Mr Romford” in tune with his voters and viewed as a local son and “our MP”. He is as far from being an identikit A-lister as it is possible to get.

It is all very well Dave and Frankie changing the Tory party’s face, but if they really want the Tories to be more representative of Britain and in tune with their voters, maybe local candidates should be the emphasis?

Now We Know What Prezza’s SpAds Do

A few weeks ago Guido asked : “Any idea what Joan Hammell and Mick Halloran, Special Advisers to the DPM do for Prezza?” Now we know. In the case of of Joan Hammell she plays croquet with him. (See there how Guido resisted the temptation to mention balls – that would be cheap).[…]

+ READ MORE +

Lib Dem MP in Heterosexual Affair Shocker

It is almost boring to record that buried on page 94 of the News of the Screws today goodie-two-shoes LibDem MP Matthew Taylor admits he is at it with someone else’s wife. Remember how censorious and “holier than thou” he was about Charlie’s personal problems?[…]

+ READ MORE +

Tucker Max Strikes A Blow for Online Freedom

My drinking buddy Tucker Max has won a breakthrough ruling (DiMeo v. Max. [PDF]) exempting a website owner from legal responsibility for comments made by third parties. Would any of the many expensive lawyers who read this blog care to reflect for free in the comments.[…]

+ READ MORE +

Fifty Tory Applicants for New Seat

Shussh, don’t tell anyone, but this is the full list of Tory applicants for the new South Northamptonshire constituency:


Simon Walker
Mel Stride
Amber Rudd
Alexandra Robson
Jason Steen
Adam Rickitt
Kulveer Singh Ranger
Heather Kay Wheeler
Margaret Alison Punyer
Mark Pawsey
Priti Patel
Emma Moffett
Ali Miraj
Cordelia McCartney
Amanda McLean
Paul Christopher Maynard
Melanie Lylla McLean
Julia Manning
Kit Malthouse
Katharine Annabel Lindsay
Brandon Kenneth Lewis
Dr Phillip Lee
Andrea Leadsom
Pauline Elizabeth Latham
Margot Cathleen James
Katherine May Hemmings
Chris Heaton-Harris
Rebecca Elizabeth Harris
Hannah Hall
Samuel Phillip Gyimah
Laetitia Gunn
Vicky Grace Ford
Ashley Gray
Andrew Griffth
Caroline Flynn-MacLeod
Jane Ellison
Peter Jonathan Cox
Timothy Richard Coleridge
Matthew Collings
Tim Collins
Damian Collins
Pamela Chesters
Conor Burns
Jonathan Bullock
Dr David Richard Bull
Sibby Buckle
Fiona Claire Bruce
Karen Anne Bradley
Harriet Baldwin
Louise Daphne Bagshawe
Tariq Mahmood Ahmad

Totty count includes Louise “Barker” Bagshawe and Adam Rickitt.
[…]

+ READ MORE +

Lib Dem’s Lord Rennard Complains to Guido

Somebody claiming to be Lib Dem Chief Exec. Chris Rennard has contacted Guido about the last post to complain about the coverage of the Lib Dems and Ming – don’t know why he didn’t just contact the Blog Complaints Commission.

“Most of these claims about polls etc.

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Polls Give Cameron Good Reason to Smile

After six months Cameron’s Conservatives have good reason to smile;

  • Tories are polling as good as they have since White Wednesday
  • The LibDems are polling the worst since they were founded
  • The Tories are ahead of Labour on schools and hospitals – even Thatcher didn’t achieve that
  • Crucial women voters are attracted to Cameron more than Brown or Ming
  • The Sun has abandoned Blair, gone cold on Brown and warmed to Cameron
  • The old Tory right is mutely eclipsed as “Project Cameron” makes progress
  • After 9 years New Labour is mired in sleaze and Lord Levy will probably be arrested by the end of the year
  • Blair is loathed by much of his own party and may face a divisive challenge at the party conference
  • Labour’s much vaunted “Chameleon Cameron” attack gambit backfired, a campaign upon which senior Labour strategists had pinned their hopes
  • Local Elections saw 316 Tory gains, Lib Dem’s flatlining and Labour losing everywhere
  • The polls say that a Brown v Cameron head-to-head will see Cameron win
  • Donors are giving generously to the Conservative Party as the Lib Dems look in financial trouble and could be forced to repay £2.4m given by a fraudster.
[…]

+ READ MORE +

Pity Ming, Be Charitable

Ming’s poll numbers are the worst since the Lib Dems were founded, his performance at PMQs is painfully embarrassing (as is his feeble line that he trots out repeatedly – “If leadership was all about performing at PMQs, William Hague would be PM”, oh purrleease…)

Puja Durbari has been brought in to spin for him, remind him what day of the week it is and administer his medication.

[…]

+ READ MORE +

Did the Tories Really Vote to Abolish EU Primacy?

Have the Tories voted for UK independence? What exactly is Bill Cash on about? In the FT he had a letter claiming:-
“The Conservative party as a whole last week voted to support my backbench amendment to the Legislative and Regulatory Reform Bill, expressly to override the European Communities Act 1972 by providing the legislative means to deregulate European burdens on British business and make this binding on the British judiciary.
[…]

+ READ MORE +



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Quote of the Day

Sky’s Faisal Islam on the mood in Parliament at the moment:

“It’s a totally febrile atmosphere here. It’s kind of like Game of Thrones meets House of Cards – and if you chuck in the Labour Party – Laurel and Hardy too.”

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