Where is Sir Peter Stringfellow?

Scanning the New Year honoours list, Guido again fails to see Peter Stringfellow getting a knighthood for his services to politics. Demi-billionaire Michael Spencer has just been made co-chairman of the City Circle Tory fund-raising operation by Cameron – bet he gets his much sought after gong soon.

The Tories owe Stringy, they should put his name forward for a gong – meantime the Campaign for a ‘Sir’ Peter Stringfellow petition to the Queen needs your signature. Do it, and right this wrong.

Previous Campaign for a ‘Sir’ Peter Stringfellow stories.

2006 In / 2005 Out

Its thin politically, so to fill in…

In / Out
Poverty of Historicism / Make Poverty History
Liberal Conservatives / Liberal Democrats
Debt / Prudence
TaxPayers Alliance / Stealth Taxes
Iran / Iraq
Choice / Stakeholders
Pimp My Party / Traditional Values

(Please add your own in the comments.)

Miliband Favourite Son

Guido’s prophecy and Gordon’s nightmare are pictured above. David Miliband is now the hot second favourite (an astonishingly short 8/1) to takeover from Blair – Brown still being the bookies favourite. Guido has laid Brown, and put a little on Ruth Kelly @ 250 / 1 – in order to profit from the prayed for re-Catholicisation of England. Guido seems to recall David and Ruth were once rumoured to be an item. Some say Miliband’s oratory is Labour’s answer to John Redwood, has anyone seen him singing the Welsh national anthem?

Tom Brake is Sad

In a press release which desperately screams “look at me, look at me please somebody”, Liberal Democrat Shadow Transport Secretary Tom Brake MP, sent out a tragic Christmas Eve press release in which he advocated that Santa used more environmentally friendly public transport. More environmentally friendly than magic flying reindeer?

UPDATE: Alex Drake in Australia emails to point out that the Hon. Warren Truss MP (really, I know the name sounds like a kinky sex position but it is his name) gave permission for Santa to over-fly Australia. Guido’s mother points out that the Irish government did the same. Why this should be the necessary when we know that Santa uses quantum effects to travel through time and space beats Guido. You didn’t think he really came down the chimney?

Merry Christmas Everyone

Before Guido gets in to the Christmas spirit of goodwill and cheer, perhaps ’tis wise to reflect and to take a moment to consider those unfortunates who were cruelly smitten this past year. The pain caused to expense fiddling MPs, name changing Tory aparachtiks, cut ‘n paste journalists, whoring wonks, Basher Davis and the shower of other hypocrites who have caused me offence. The mocking, exposing and humiliating has sometimes verged on cruel. It was not always dignified or even honourable.

But Guido has enjoyed every minute of it. Back after Christmas and in the New Year, watch out for something a bit special: GuidoandtheMonkey.Com

Seriously Organised Criminal Carol Singers

In breach of Section 132 of the Serious Organised Crime Act 2005, assorted political dissidents sang Silent Night, Come All Ye Faithful and Hark the Herald Angels Sing. These two in the red look seriously cute. Ceaseless protester Brian Haw bored on at the end (that’s him in the hat on the far left), giving a bonkers speech that Guido totally disagreed with, but was still nevertheless glad to hear. That’s democracy for you.
Tim Ireland, twisted genius that he is, looked gleeful to see 200 or so carol singers in full voice outside parliament. Including that girl who read out the names of British Iraqi war dead and was promptly arrested outside Downing Street. Maya Evans, 25, convicted for breaching the Act last week, sure is pretty. Yes, Guido has been drinking…

Twigg Wants £10,000 for Straw

Wonk for Sale : Pundit Payola they are calling it in the beltway. Think-tankers on the take is what it is, and cash-for-access is the game at the Foreign Policy Centre – this month their newsletter offers multinational corporations two choices, firstly the chance to meet Jack Straw at the Foreign Office for £10,000. Not much beating about the bush here – its by invitation only and those invites cost £10,000. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, they aim “to facilitate a dialogue between policy makers and key stakeholders on how government decisions impact on commercial and organisational plans.”

If you are a media conglomerate or just can’t afford £10,000, for £300 you can meet second choice James Purnell MP, the Minister for Media and lobby him about that juicy broadcasting licence you wanted (Kip Meek from OFCOM will be there so you can put it to the regulator as well at the same time). Guido would pay £300 to avoid meeting James Purnell…

Carol Singing Tonight

Tim Ireland, situationist political prankster extraordinaire, urges us to Don we now our gay apparel“. Doesn’t Guido always?

The Beeb will be covering this particular Carol Service organised by the blogosphere. Guido feels that failing to attend would be a betrayal of all those Brits who died for freedom whilst fighting Baathist tyranny in Iraq. Guido looks forward to mince pies, mistletoe and mulled wine…

See you in Parliament Square tonight at 6pm. Details here.

Cameron Spams LibDems

A Guido embedded operative in parliament tells me that Dave’s overture to the LibDems includes emailing individual LibDem MPs setting out his social justice and green credentials – near enough inviting them to swap sides. The emails contain the line “I have always been a liberal” The email also talked of “actions not words”.[…]


Think-Tankers on the Take

Wonk for Sale : The Times has an article that will seem familiar to this blog’s readers and will make a few wonks in London nervous. As the fall-out from the Doug Bandow scandal in Washington spreads – London based wonks who have taken cash to write press releases in the form of pamphlets will be keeping a low profile.[…]


Christmas Comes Early at CCHQ

If the boys and girls at Tory HQ weren’t already smiling the Indy reports they have been given a £1000 bonus each. Reports that Francis Maude has been seen in a red suit and white beard are unconfirmed.


Charlie Denies Drink Problem

“I am an extremely infrequent and moderate consumer of alcohol.”



Travel Advice

When travelling in Europe to Brussels, Berlin or Paris, always remember to take a handbag with you. Failure to do so may cost you £7,000,000,000.


Wacko Zacko to Be Proxy Target?

The plutocratic environmentalist Zac Goldsmith is part of the new look Cameron’s Conservatives. However over at ConservativeHome.Com the Tory troops in the comments section are beginning to mutiny and Zac looks likely to be the proxy focus of their ire.[…]


Speccie Blog Talks a Load of Boles

Looks like the Speccie post-Boris has gone downhill already. It has a story about a ‘coalition’ meeting held at the Adam Smith Institute on Tuesday 6 December. (The ‘coalition’ is an informal coffee morning for right-wing wonks hosted at the ASI.) This particular meeting was sparsely attended despite the mince pies – and most of those there had backed Davis.[…]


2009 Tory Manifesto to be Orange

On reflection Guido thinks its tactical genius to canvass liberals for support and destabilise Charlie at the same time. With Charlie gone by spring say, the LibDems will be plunged into civil war with the choice of Menzies Campbell, their answer to Malcolm Rifkind, Mark Oaten their answer to Basher Davis or Simon Hughes, the darling of the LibDem’s backroom boys.[…]


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Quote of the Day

Trump jokes about media bias…

“The media is even more biased against me than ever before. You want the proof? Michelle Obama gives a speech and everyone loves it. It’s fantastic. They think she’s absolutely great. My Wife Melania gives the exact same speech! And people get on her case! And I don’t get it! I don’t know Why!”

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