Wednesday, August 31, 2005

The Sandeman Can..?

Mandelson’s Influence on Blair?

The boy Blair (Euan, pictured), is exhibiting chilling evidence of an unhealthy svengali influence. Guido remembers as a 14 year old tragically nursing a few bristles, before growing the luxurious affair you see above.

Leave it Euan.

KC : Fedora in the Ring “Its Time to Win”

His Fedora is formally thrown in the ring via the traditional Tory device of an interview with the Daily Mail.

KC’s slogan is going to be “Its Time to Win.” His pisspoor campaign website is up at www.kenclarke.co.uk

Odds on KC to win have been slashed from 10/1 to 5/1, after thousands of pounds in bets were made by punters this weekend.

Undemocratic Reforms Looking Unlikely

In a letter to the Torygraph six former chairmen and presidents of the National Convention – the Tory party’s ruling body – say the proposals to return the decisive vote to MPs are undemocratic and should be rejected.

It will be interesting to see if the wider Tory membership loathes Ken Clarke as much as the journalistic consensus reckons – Guido suspects not. Now he has confessed the error of his ways on the Euro they will be more likely to forgive his apostasy and be willing to have him lead them to the promised land of government.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

You Don’t Say…

Research says journalists read blogs.

Guido has taken to putting excerpts of his hit-logs in the bottom right column, just so the next time somebody at the Guardian claims (after they have lifted a story without attribution) that they have never read the blog… well you be the judge.

The weblogs show that skiving lawyers, investment bankers, journos and public sector “workers” are the majority of readers. (Incidentally, would the avid blog-reader from South East of England Development Agency please just stop working altogether – the South East of England is over-developed.)

Monday, August 29, 2005

Trust the People…

Guido counts only twenty-one Tory MPs to have so far declared that they think the next leader should have to win the confidence of rank-and-file members. This democratic imperative may seem like a trifling detail to some Tory MPs, but it is obvious to those of us in the 21st century.

Apparently only to Michael Ancram MP, Douglas Carswell MP, William Cash MP, Nadine Dorries MP, Iain Duncan Smith MP, Michael Gove MP, John Hayes MP, Andrew Lansley MP, Edward Leigh MP, Barry Legg MP, Julian Lewis MP, Theresa May MP, Owen Paterson MP, Mike Penning MP, Andrew Rosindell MP, Richard Shepherd MP, Bob Spink MP, Ed Vaizey MP, Angela Watkinson MP, Ann Widdecombe MP and David Willetts MP.

No word from the rest… apart from Ken Clarke, who definitely doesn’t want to lead the party if members have a say in it.

UPDATE: Liam Fox says he is against the reforms. So 22 MPs are against them – any more names readers?

Bye Yeo (Again)

Guido seems to recall Yeo telling friends some months ago that he would not run, so how can he now in all honesty say he is pulling out to urge his non-existent supporters to back KC?

Portillo also came out for KC in the Sunday Times.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

Normal Service Wil Be Resumed

Saturday, August 27, 2005

"MY BOOZE AND SEX SHAME"

Jim Devine wants to represent Labour in Robin Cook’s old seat. He wants to carry on in the same tradition as Cook.

Shouldn’t be too hard for him. When Robin Cook abandoned his wife for his mistress she wrote fondly of finding him passed out on the floor after he had boozed himself senseless. The Daily Record reports Jim Devine yesterday telling

…of his shame over a string of affairs and a drink-driving conviction.

The union official has been selected by Labour to fight the Livingston by-election after the death of Robin Cook. And he promised to honour his friend’s memory by being honest about his own past mistakes. “I had a number of affairs which I regret…Temptation has been there and I gave in to it. I am not going to pretend otherwise… I caused a lot of pain.” He also admitted a drink-driving conviction five years ago.

So he is another drunken, shagger just like Robin Cook. Bravo Livingston Labour party for maintaining traditions.

Bonkers : No Joking

Taking time off from imagining he was running the country while Tony and Cherie holiday at Cliff’s place in Barbados, Bonkers Blunkett has had his lawyers fire off a few threatening letters to Channel 4 – warning them he takes a dim view of their new satire “A Very Social Secretary”. (If someone at Channel 4 wants to share the letters, Guido’s fax number is on the right!) No longer Home Secretary, he is unable to ban it as a Threat to National Security*, instead he thinks nobody should be allowed to take the piss out of him just because he fathered a bastard child by another man’s wife, and she wants to have it brought up by her husband, rather than Bonkers. Ouch.

It is of course no breach of the child’s right to privacy, but it will make Bonkers even more of a laughing stock. Ha!
*Translated : something politically embarassing that we don’t want you to read about in the papers. Like “What I did on my summer holidays”
©Tony Blair


Seen Elsewhere

Tory MP Tells Leftie Jon Snow to Retire | Guardian
Russell Brand’s New Book “Sub-Undergraduate Dross” | Telegraph
Tory MP Barrister Represents Monaco Billionaire | Scrapbook
MOBO Singers Slam UKIP | ITV
Could UKIP Keep Britain in the EU? | Iain Martin
Why Piketty is Wrong | ConHome
Guido Whips Politicians Into Shape | Guardian
Milburn Levelling Down | Kathy Gyngell
Crosby and Carswell Make Friends at Guido’s Dinner | Mail
Mrs Danczuk Beats Mensch to Win Guido | Telegaph
PM Congratulates Blogger Who Destroyed Minister | Mail


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Rob Colvile reviews Russell Brand’s new book:

“Oddly, the person I feel sorriest for isn’t Brand himself – although he certainly comes across as a rather pitiable figure, projecting his own brokenness on to the world around him – but Johann Hari. Drummed out of Fleet Street for plagiarism, the former Independent columnist has washed up as “my mate Johann, who’s been doing research for this book”. For a genuinely talented polemicist, it would have been a humbling experience to have to treat this sub-undergraduate dross as the scintillating wisdom of a philosopher-king.”



Mycroft says:

Have you read the last bit of Animal Farm?

You know where the animals are looking through the Farmhouse window?

My TV screen was that window at lunch-time today.

Be careful, the sudden self-congratulatory tone, the slightly pudgy outline of indulgence and you become exactly what you should despise.

The jolly face of the Quisling Cameron poses for your camera has mesmerised and deceived you, you who were once not so deceived.

You were no firebrand, you were a damp squib in my opinion, sorry.

You need a damned good kick up the ahse!


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